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Got some sleep. so maybe I can think clearly
(Preview)
I was able to finally get some sleep, of course after I yelled and cried a lot which has no effect on my AH. He slept on the couch and acts like he is not at all bothered by anything and that hurts even more. He woke me up this morning saying he was going to the bank to make things right and that he thought I shou...
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mamakat71
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7
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597
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C2C,,,6/9
(Preview)
The C2C reading or June 9th speaks of the 7 th step which suggests that we" humbly ask HP to remove our shortcomings." The reading focuses on the word humble and explains that it does not mean begging for mercy, because real humility is discovered by our ability to see our true relationship to God and to...
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lookingup
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3
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395
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Dipping my Toes in the Recovery of Life...
(Preview)
Hello MIP Family ... Welp. Its Been Way to Long... Seems Life takes over sometimes and I Forget were I got our Footing to Carry on... I Love that even after all this time, I can Come back and still see Sooo Much Recovery here... My Recovery Road is Still Carrying On at a Rather Steady Wonderful Pace :) Thi...
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Jozie
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6
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432
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any quick fixes for the anxiety ?
(Preview)
So I am really trying to work on things, go to meetings, vent here.... but what can I do to immediately know out the anxiety, obsessive thoughts etc when he drinks and gets loud and then I can't concentrate. So not like I haven't used up energy--worked at the hospital for 6 hours. then did gym for 2 hours...
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Dancer66
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9
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692
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not sure if I am crazy or obsessed or normal. definitely frustrated and confused , angry and resentful
(Preview)
I still so confused and don't understand things. So many things AH does when he drinks still bother me. Like being loud and tuning out others. So I am suppose to "accept" this or ignore it and just concentrate on me. It's hard--his smell and loudness hard to do--and I feel resentful having to move my...
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Dancer66
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6
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1252
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Courage to Change 6/8/18
(Preview)
Today's reading is about Step 6 - Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character. Many of us find that we our defects have become habit, and we may even cling to them as they give pleasure or comfort. Consider revenge - many of us spend tons of time creating mental scenarios where w...
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Iamhere
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3
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381
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got the dreaded call
(Preview)
While I was posting the update earlier I got the dreaded call to come and pick up my AH from detox. I have worked the last 5 nights (busy), lost sleep and finally had a moment of peace and in an instant I feel that coming unraveled because I instantly had a meltdown and lost it. I have had all this anger and h...
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mamakat71
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6
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489
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F2F meeting was much needed. Glad I went
(Preview)
I went to a f2f meeting tonight and I am glad I did. It was so nice to hear other's stories and know that I am not alone. I have only been a few times before and like with this on-line group I know I need to keep going. My AH has made no efforts to go to any meetings and he is still behaving the same so I am keeping...
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mamakat71
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3
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402
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Growing up?
(Preview)
Trying to sort out what is hormonal and what is actual since my perceptions are a little skewed at the moment. I'm watching things play out around me at the moment through work and some friendships I have .. I'm trying to put boundaries up and not make them walls it's just hard when it seems others won't l...
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SerenityRUS
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4
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401
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Newcomer and depressed
(Preview)
I'm sick of going through this cycle. My AH is an alcoholic and addict. he thinks alcohol is not "as bad" and says stuff like at least he's just drinking. Or at least it's "just beer" instead of hard liquor. Or at least it's "just marijuana" instead of hard drugs. And he keeps saying over and over how he's g...
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sakina
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15
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617
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Courage to Change 6/7/18
(Preview)
Today's reading is about Step 5 - Admitted to God, to myself and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs. The writer realizes there is a reason and purpose that God is first in this step. In theory and practice, God does know who we are, where we are going, where we have been and will lead and g...
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Iamhere
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1
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359
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Update about Work
(Preview)
Hi Everyone,
Been trying to keep to my side of the street as best I can but assert myself when needed. Yesterday brought a new incident with my supervisor. She wanted me to grant her access to my work email so when I'm out, she could respond to work related requests. She assured me she would not read any pe...
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tiredtonite
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12
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727
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5th anniversary
(Preview)
Tonight I'm celebrating with another group member, our 5th anniversary in Alanon. We are having a cake and receiving 5 yr Alanon coins. I'm psyched! I'm so grateful, healthier, and so much better able to cope with all the grief in my life. I want to thank all of you, for listening and supporting me....
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Lyne
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10
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707
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Anger
(Preview)
Today my overwhelming emotion is anger. I want to throw thing. I want to break things. ABF has been off alcohol a week now with the help of medication. And in that week, he just wants to brush everything that happened, all the hurts he's caused under the rug like it never happened. THis is his usual defaul...
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MizzB
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16
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1059
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Got compassion and empathy?
(Preview)
Give it away. My heart and head is feeling numb and bruised and I am trying to increased the hopefulness that comes from being a long time member of the AFG. Still it bothers the hell out of me and brings out the negative emotions that our disease seems to thrive on. I am a dual member and recently spok...
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Jerry F
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12
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616
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update on been awhile
(Preview)
I had my attorney appointment today and I felt sad at first and by the end of it I felt mad at my situation. I still haven't heard from my AH who I assume is still in detox, but I was painted a very bleak picture of how hard and expensive it can be legally to separate the AH from my life. The attorney seemed to t...
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mamakat71
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0
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383
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Courage to Change June 6
(Preview)
Today's reading in Courage to Change is about the fourth step. The author shares that it can be easy to justify our own unacceptable behavior, but the fourth step helps us to overcome this with courage and self-discipline. When we freely acknowledge who we have been, we can make positive changes and c...
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Skorpi
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3
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461
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Been awhile
(Preview)
I am back! I was out there for awhile believing that things had gotten better. You would think with my years of exposure to the alcoholics tricks, lies and empty promises I would know better. My AH has been drinking vodka every day, even on his driving job putting himself, our families financial sec...
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mamakat71
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8
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458
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Another ruined week/summer
(Preview)
Been awhile since I've been on. Hope all is ok with everyone. Seems like I only get on when things have gotten bad. Looks like things have changed on here or am I just not signing on right? So I hope I'm doing this right. In March my alcoholic father in law died, he was 84 and living in a nursing home. He was al...
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pixie
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6
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472
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Family Craziness
(Preview)
So, dealing with some craziness this weekend, but I am thankful that I have my Anon-tools that I can use when necessary! Kid is graduating on Wed. Last month I reached out to his father to let him know the date and that each graduate gets ONLY 6 tickets. We could split them in half. He could decide who gets h...
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PosiesandPuppies
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9
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527
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C2C Reading 6-5
(Preview)
The C22C reading for June 5 speaks about the 3rd Step-- Turning our will and lives over to the care of a Power Greater than ourselves. . The reading goes on to clearly remind us that this HP is filled with compassion and loves us unconditionally.i When we pray for guidance and become willing to turn o...
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hotrod
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4
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353
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Heavy physical depression after a disappointment - then lifts
(Preview)
Yesterday I had prepared a bbq to bring to my parents. My dad had also prepared a good bit of stuff. This was all for the BIL and three kids. When I got there I got the message that they weren't coming as the oldest wanted to catch the 6pm bus to Dublin. There should be no big surprise there as there are always c...
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Faintly Falling
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7
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504
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When will I have some relief from this paranoia if ever.....
(Preview)
My husband was sober for the first 5 years of our relationship. I never saw him use and we started dating at around 6 or 7 months sober. I didn't know the signs or any reason to look for signs. Last year he relapsed around this time. We had alot of life changes and I think he freaked and his fear brought him bac...
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Bodhismom
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10
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664
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Need help
(Preview)
Hello, I've been a lurker on here for the last few months. My husband was an alcoholic and we have struggled so much with his drinking. Ive tried so hard to work the steps and detach and last night he shot himself in the head while we were watching a movie together in our bed. He was extremely intoxicated af...
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2143
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11
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611
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C2C, 6/4
(Preview)
Possibility and Hope: Step two says we come to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. We are asked to open our minds to this possibility. A source of assistance may be able to do for us what we have not been able to do for ourselves . The writer says we don't have to belie...
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Lyne
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6
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436
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Situation with friend quickly escalated
(Preview)
Hi everyone I have a friend who has been struggling with alcohol, and has had the issues of countless DUI, going to rehab and drinking shortly after, etc. His wife is a good friend of mine and weve gone to Al-Anon and shared our experiences to help each other. While shes out of town, hes been on his drinkin...
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gabigail
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7
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416
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Me... now...
(Preview)
hi y'all... ... [kia ora koutou... he mihi ana... ]... ah were always set up against "city hall", and the gummint, as i used to call it. fact is- I lived in a valley that was flooded to provide electric power- in the 80's and 90's. As as an adult child i was always going to have issues with authority. No...
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DavidG
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8
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549
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New comer
(Preview)
hello! i am excited to get started with this program. In person meetings would be awesome, but are not possible for me at this time. Im looking forward to being part of the online al anon group!
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Dottie5
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11
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437
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Hope for Today June 3
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about how coming into Alanon is a life changer for so many reasons. Like many others when I first came to the program I figured it would help me change the behavior of my then AH; I soon realized that the help in alanon was for me. As this reading describes, many of...
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yanksfan51
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6
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403
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Funding of the MIP Boards
(Preview)
Hello all Good News Tanin has turned off the Community fund request on each message Board. The Community Funding solicitation. was extremely successful as we received enough to cover. about 20 months at $17.98 per month.We are now paid up until l April 2019. Thank you all for your generosi...
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hotrod
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5
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406
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CTC-6-2
(Preview)
C2C reading for today reminds us of the benefits that we obtain from working the alanon program it suggests that by facing the many problems that life brings, using the program tools we become convinced that HP will never abandon us or let us down. Life may be difficult and we may not get what we want...
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lookingup
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4
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316
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Metaphors
(Preview)
The kids and I will start moving this weekend. It has been beyond stressful. I've had to downsize and pack up a four-bedroom house almost single-handedly. I will be moving into a nice tiny little two-bedroom place back in town close to their school. Once we get through this part I think life will be a lot...
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WestMan
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14
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786
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6/1/18 C2C - Expectations -> Resentments
(Preview)
Today's Courage shares one member's take that "an expectation is a premeditated resentment", and therefore, a felt resentment has expectation as a likely source.In a situation where a pattern of behavior in another is known, say habitual tardiness, resentment may be avoided by scheduling a meet...
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Enigmatic
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8
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365
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5/31/18 C2C - Hero Goes on Journey
(Preview)
Pinch hitting today for IAH...Today's Courage to Change reading refers to one of the two stories told by man: Hero goes on a journey, overcoming great challenges on the way to claiming treasure or something of great value.Our recovery path in AlAnon often follows this story along spiritual lines as...
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Enigmatic
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6
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351
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A By-Product
(Preview)
So a little update on me... I have finally finished my schooling. I am graduating at the top of my class tomorrow! There were times that I just didn't think I could emotionally get through this... but my goal of independently supporting my kid was a strong one! For the last two months, in addition to scho...
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PosiesandPuppies
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11
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396
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A need to vent
(Preview)
I'm about to pop with stress. The ExABF is sleeping on my couch atm because his treatment is down here. He's been clean for a week now but keeps pushing and pushing back at work which is his trigger. It's stressful as I can't move on while he's there. His treatment is important which is why he's here. My u...
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MizzB
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8
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539
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Life...sometimes you just have to keep living it.
(Preview)
Well it's one foot in front of the other over here. I am having to battle with that familiar companion, depression, and try to stay in the moment. The kids are good and for that I'm grateful. School is going well and already that's a half year gone with some good interim grades. My last exam for the semes...
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a4l
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3
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434
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Kratum
(Preview)
Hi everyone. I have an online friend who is hooked on pain pills.........and started using Kratum...Kratom(sp?) to get away from them...... I won't get into the what is legal and what is natural and all that. To me, anything that changes the way I feel/act is an issue. Lately she's been lying, A LOT, th...
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Tude
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8
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658
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Courage to Change May 30
(Preview)
Today's reading in Courage to Change is about the slogan "Be gentle with yourself". The author shares that this concept was a foreign one. What was familiar was striving for perfection and hating oneself when perfection was not achieved. The author struggled to understand how to be gentle with th...
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Skorpi
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6
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472
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Newcomer
(Preview)
So, Iâm 23 and Iâve lived with my mother who is an active A all my life. Sheâs been sober on and off, and she was sober for the last 4 years but 6 mo ago sheâs completely fallen off the wagon. Itâs very hard. She fell down the stairs because she was impaired, and I worry about her so much. Iâm moving in a few days,...
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Kitty9876
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8
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385
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I'm new, I'm scared, tired, angry and ovewhelmed
(Preview)
I guess this is the 1st step. I've looked around for meetings in my area, so maybe that will be step 2. I've reached a critical stage it seems w/my fiancé. More then anything 'different' it's just that I'm fed up w/the cycle. My story. I'm divorced, mother of 2 teen boys 17 and 18. I divorced their d...
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overit2
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6
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439
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For Groo-Al Anon Forum Article
(Preview)
Many years ago I had an article shared with my from Al Anon's Forum magazine. I wanted to share it here because when I truly sat down and read it word for word, line by line, I came to understand that I had a part in this disease and how it was playing out in my life. I hope this helps others here on the board, a...
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andromeda
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11
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549
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ODAT Reading 5-29
(Preview)
The ODAT reading for May 29 speaks about the principle of" detachment". The reading suggests that detachment is at times confusing and some attempt to practice it by having a grim resolve not to speak. Such silence is filled with bitterness and does nothing to communicate our love and compassi...
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hotrod
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5
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401
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The Talk ..
(Preview)
Oh goodness .. we finally had THE talk with my youngest about the oldest .. and I am soooo grateful I listened to my gut regarding the situation as a mama. I know this has been difficult with my oldest because he's wanting to tell his brother .. I was insistent the timing be good for the youngest .. I wanted...
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SerenityRUS
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8
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502
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Interesting thing happened with KID yesterday
(Preview)
So my kid is about to graduate from high school. His dad is still in rehab, but hopefully will be out to attend. His dad has missed every big event in his kid's high school life for the past 3 years. Either due to actively drinking, or in the case of the last 5 months, being in rehab. My son is graduating from t...
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PosiesandPuppies
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19
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610
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Living alone
(Preview)
This past weekend, I finally stepped out and said I am doing this alone! I went camping alone. I returned yesterday and I was so proud of myself for stepping out of my comfort zone and taking care of me. I live alone with my adult daughter and I am adjusting to a new lifestyle. I was in fact grateful that I did...
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joker
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7
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447
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Best Fictional Books to Read
(Preview)
Hi there. I am completely new to Al Anon and am still in a state of shock. I am finding that while all the self help codependency books are helpful, I find more healing in a narrative/fictional story that paints the details out of being in a relationship with an A that I can relate to. Whenever I search f...
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slybib
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3
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4342
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Just for laughs......a parenting story
(Preview)
I figured I'd share a story from yesterday where I was able to laugh at my controlling/not trusting God kind of parenting things.... Yesterday, my son was out hiking and doing some photography with a friend he had met online. He was picking the guy up at his house across town and they were going to drive...
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andromeda
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5
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414
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C2C, 5/28
(Preview)
Comparing: The writer says that the only valid comparisons are between herself as she is and the self she used to be. When she thinks of Step 2, being restored to sanity, such a comparison comes to her mind. She talks of an incident 20 years ago, where she crashed her bike, and instead of being gratefu...
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Lyne
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2
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332
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Sunday morning meeting starting NOW!!!!!
(Preview)
May 27, 2018SUNDAY MORNING SPIRITUAL AL-ANON MEETING 10AM EST (7AM PACIFIC)TOPIC: IN WHAT WAY'S HAS YOUR HP "CLEARED THE PATH" FOR YOU TO HAVE A BETTER LIFE? or Open Topic as it relates to living with an alcoholic.The website link to the group meeting room is http://www.12stepforums.net/chatro...
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Overcome
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2
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403
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Getting along to my area assembly...
(Preview)
Attending an Alanon Assembly... I did not so alone- as I usually do... which was great... when people came up with group reports... I stepped up at the end. I wanted to upload what had happened to my group- and the part I played in it. I could have called in the district rep- and I didn't. I am committed to...
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DavidG
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4
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387
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Hope for Today May 27
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about the presence of sanity/insanity in our lives, and step 2- believing a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. When I first began considering these ideas, I always immediiately attributed the chaos and crazy situations that my then A...
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yanksfan51
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3
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360
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Keeping distance from drama while trying to do the right thing by kids
(Preview)
It has been a bit of a fraught time but, thankfully, there is light at the end of the tunnel. My BIL is moving to Dublin, back to his home town, and the kids are going. This is a great move for all of them as they are all city folk and have spent a good bit of time there. It is also where my BIL works so practical day...
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Faintly Falling
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6
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472
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Looking up posted today's C2C reading to the business board- i transferred it
(Preview)
Post InfoTOPIC: CTC,,,5/26lookingup ~*Service Worker*~ Status: OfflinePosts: 835Date: 1h agoIP: 172.8.13.94CTC,,,5/26Permalink Reply Quote More The C2C reading for May 26 speaks about the slogan ' keeping an open mind." The reading suggests that many times our idealistic rules for be...
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hotrod
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4
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411
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Trust issues in relationships
(Preview)
hi,this is my first post. My mom was a Raging Alcholic and still is. She was also a mean narcissist. I am 47. I have come to terms and built my strength through hard work but my issue that plagues me is in relationships. I fell in love with a new woman. We are really in love and getting along so well. No drama. S...
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Jojijung
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6
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5349
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just things
(Preview)
I haven't posted in a few days as I was doing well and I was still doing well. For those having read my last thread, it ended (I think) in the fact that my recovering husband had a small seizure whilst we were getting ready to swim with the girls for the first time in a long time and everyone was very excited....
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Dutchy
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12
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558
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Courage to Change 5/25/18
(Preview)
Today's reading is about this disease and denial. We learn in Al-Anon that while the alcoholic may be in denial about their drinking, many of us who have been affected by this disease deny our problems as well. Although we have possibly been living in chaos and worry, full of self-doubt and depleted...
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Iamhere
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9
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439
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A question or opinion
(Preview)
My sister and I are having a discussion. I haven't seen my family since February (they are in Holland and I am in London, not a great deal of water in between but still) and as next week is a half term for my eldest I was hoping to visit my family back home and get some more scrumptious Dutch food while I am ther...
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Dutchy
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10
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601
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Step 6 on the step Board
(Preview)
Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Step 6 has been posted to the Step Work Board . Please join in and share your thoughts. Here is the link http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t646...
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hotrod
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3
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371
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Courage to Change 5/24/18
(Preview)
The daily for tomorrow talks to me about how my will gets me into trouble! The writing suggests that even when we get our way, we are rarely satisfied. It doesn't make our life complete, so we want more or raise the ante, set a new goal and push even harder. The other option - we don't get what we want and f...
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Iamhere
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9
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398
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