Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

This is what I've been praying about these days. I answered a few posts here tonight but not much to offer to others right now. It's hard to sit with things over which you have little to no control. I have worked through many of the feelings concerning the ending of my job. I received unemployment, have ap...

mamalioness · mamalioness

Hi everybody Hi everybody I just wanted to stop in and say hello And tell you that last Saturday I had a very very bad back spasm, it was so bad by Sunday I could not even get around. Dressing myself to get to urgent care was sheer agony I had to go to emergency care and found this really wonderful Doctor Wh...

Skorpi · Skorpi

In today's reading, the author reflects on expectations that many newcomers have for AlAnon. Many of us may have been governed by a strict rule of order as a way to feel that we had some control living with the disease of Alcoholism. We may have expected a program as successful as AlAnon to be even more ri...

SoulSearcher · SoulSearcher

Hi, I have yet to start the steps of alanon however, I have attended a few meetings. My on Ana doff boyfriend of four years just came back from rehab two weeks ago. Throughout our whole relationship he had promised to get help or get better and I kept holding onto his promises that never came true. Eventua...

jitsuka · jitsuka

Hi everyone Having a period of ups and downs. Mostly downs or flatligning. Just could do with some esh please. Sad when you realise situations won't change eh and you just gotta get on with things for the short term until you can get out. X

hotrod · hotrod

The odat reading for October 16 speaks about the negative coping tools that we develop when living with the disease of alcoholism. It points out that alanon is a fellowship of equals and that those who come to meetings with feelings of superiority often find that the people that they judge harsh...

Lyne · Lyne

Forgiveness: Today's reading talks about the most loving form of detachment, which is forgiveness. It doesn't wipe the slate clean, or pronounce someone "not guilty." Forgiveness cuts the strings of resentment that bind them to a problem or past hurt. By releasing resentment, you set yoursel...

VickiR · VickiR

Hi MIP! I'm just checking in to post a custody question and a quick update on my life. I love reading this board daily, it keeps me grounded and everyone here is so inspiring and following the principles of this program keeps me centred. I just moved into my new house and life is finally really coming toge...

mamalioness · mamalioness

there is absolutely ZERO that anyone can do about this and I think the stress of it caused my major back spasm lately my BIGGEST client has not been doing well...Bad decisions by the dad, doing really ill advised financial moves, its been bad of late (last 2 years) but when lenders don't wanna lend them a...

a4l · a4l

Greetings MIP family. Today's Courage to Change reading speaks of awareness bought to the authors' attention through attending meetings. The action to change includes the use of the slogans, and todays reading features a beautiful example of "Easy does it" as a new response to frustration prev...

Pol · Pol

Growing up I only had my mom as my dad passed away at an early age. So I have my "uncle" who is technically not related to me in anyway but him and my mom grew up together so wherever we were he would move in with us every few years to help my mom out with babysitting and being an alcoholic himself...they got alo...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Thirty-one years ago on the Sunday past, I ended up at a treatment center. I can readily admit that I did NOT go voluntarily; I had a nudge from a judge as I had two serious court cases/charges against me from 2 different states. I tied on the biggest 'one' possible on that day, thus consider 10/8 as my so...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I haven't heard from my friend and I don't think I will mostly because I believe if she's not in the hospital she is in a rehab facility and I have doubts if she is still in the throws of the disease even when she gets out she will not contact me. I understand the shame and self pity for lack of a better term. S...

Hi All - New Member · GrpThrpy41

Hello, I am new to the forum and wanted to say hi. I heard about the forum today via my husband's therapist. Today, for the first time ever, he asked me if I would join him for his therapy session. He started seeing a therapist within the last month after our fighting over his use got especially bad. I am th...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I saw my mom & survived the visit. I was so worried about what she might say about the past. She is in an assisted living center for mentally I'll people. She is doing well but me I feel anxiety because of the visit. It was too close to home

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

good morning everyone- Today's reading is about the relationship we have w our HP and how sometimes we may question it or the strength of the connection there. The writer mentions that after the loss of his parents he also felt the loss of his connection w God, or at least felt an abandonment at that tim...

bud · bud

I knew better but still have old unhealthy patterns of being conflict avoidant at any cost. I've recently been shocked at a "friend's" behavior towards me name calling, standing me up for plans and after I'm there sending a lame text "I'm out having fun with X, hope you're not upset." She had borrowed e...

Freetime · Freetime

One Day At a Time in Al-Anon, October 12, is the fable of a woman who kept her alcoholic husband and her three teenage children under her Enormous Thumb. Because they were stuck under the Enormous Thumb, the husband and kids were flattened and could not do any growing up. The woman was a Very Nice Lady, wh...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for October 9 speaks about our attitudes towards God.,prior to entering program. The reading suggests that many of us looked at God as an adversary and refused to reach out for help. I can so identify with that feeling. When the pain of addiction became too much, the reading indi...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading discusses how many of us tend to look for answers by over-analyzing with often black/white thinking. Many of us, when new to Al-Anon, were asked to learn about the disease of alcoholism. Many of us again sought to read, study, analyze all that we could on the subject. We then began t...

norasq · norasq

Hi - Im struggling with a situation and would welcome any ESH. i have been separated from my X-AH for 5 years, divorced for 1.5 yrs. his drinking and Xanax use were big issues. he was a zombie or mean and biting for the last few years. Denied having a proglem with substances. Refused to get help or do couns...

Carla61 · Carla61

My AH is adopted And met many of his brothers and sisters through ancestry.com. These people are in town tonight and he wants to have dinner with them I'm ok with that. However he texted me to call his IOP program to tell them he will not be there tonight because of a work crisis. I told him to call them hims...

pikelpak · pikelpak

Hi all, I am a grateful member of Al-Anon. We have a step meeting in our city, which is really helpful for recovery. We have been recently getting into the discussion, how much we can deviate from the step (one step a month, say, step 9 for September). I first thought, the step is like a topic in any other Al...

oceanpine · oceanpine

I knew his path must be taking him here, but it picked up speed so quickly that it is shocking. Unlike many A's, he has not been in and out of the ER or had multiple medical emergencies... hadn't been to a dr in over three years, and now he is in a nursing home and his body is shutting down from liver and kidney...

Pol · Pol

I consider myself new to alanon because I feel I don't have it down yet like other long time members do. But the trouble I'm having is that I don't know if I want to stick to the program. The reason I joined alanon was because alcoholism has effected me and is still continuing to do its damage. Because of thi...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Good morning MIP! Today's reading in Courage to Change is about accepting what we cannot change and changing what we can. The author shares that, as a child, they used to cling to the door handle of the car when the car went around a sharp curve so as to prevent the car from going over the edge. Of course,...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is both about the unique relationship of sponsor/sponsee and the gift of hearing and listening to our HPs will. The writer describes how early in the program as he/she was without a sponsor, the perception of the person who would one day become the sponsor was t...

Jozie · Jozie

Boy this Disease I Swear sits like a Gargoyle on a Post Waiting to Attack at any moment in my Family... One of the Hardest things I have had to work on thru my Own addiction is "Judgment" In my Family Everyone Judges Everyone (Mostly Based on Opinion) Never on Honest Truth, because Honestly I don't know...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

This is along the lines of another poster who spoke of "the lies". My understanding of the disease of addiction is it will do anything to survive and if given a place to hide it will remain stagnated however active in thought and deed. That doesn't mean out right confrontation is a solution .. althou...

Lyne · Lyne

I learned on Friday that a childhood friend died from breast cancer. I had little contact with her in my adult life, but did send a yearly birthday and holiday card. About two years ago we talked about making amends in my F2F meeting, and I realized with all the amends I had made, I owed her one. I didn't w...

Lyne · Lyne

Recovery, miracles, and gratitude: The writer points out that in spite of frustration, anger, disappointment, and anxiety, brought forth from coping with a loved one's alcoholism , they could still learn to live a serene and happy life. The writer says that this alone is a miracle, and by practic...

PosiesandPuppies · PosiesandPuppies

This reading from "The Language of Letting Go," By M. Beattie jumped out at me, and stuck with me throughout my day. So much so that I asked permission to post it. I think it may help others who like me, find themselves in the "second-half" of their life and are without their spouse who was the main bread-w...

RachelsMom · RachelsMom

Hi there! I've had a couple of good months with daughter making some progress. But, alas, the peaceful period of time is over. Again. She had a job but lost it. Moved in with a guy she had just met and, amazingly, it was going pretty well. This guy was her age (28) and was a father at 18. His Father had to sen...

Lyne · Lyne

In about an hour I am going to take a walk with my brother who abused me in childhood into teen years. I have decided that besides for his bad health heart-wise, that it may help me overcome my PTSD if I can be with him and feel in control. All my work in program has brought me to this point of strength and con...

el-cee · el-cee

Im thinking more and more about step 3 and God's will for me. I feel step 3 is a really important step and my understanding is becoming deeper. 'Made a decision to turn our will and our life over to the care of God as we understood him.' I can see that I have made the decision over the years without fully under...

a4l · a4l

Greetings MIP family. Today's reading speaks about how growth in recovery is an ongoing process and opportunity. "Although the crisis that bought us to Alanon may be past, there is always something new to learn, even after years of recovery".I am reminded in this reading of my own perspective tow...

Freetime · Freetime

This page talks about replacing negativity with gratitude for the positive qualities in ourselves, our circumstances, and other human beings. Negativity keeps our life at a standstill. The writer believes they have a beautiful spirit that has been created for some purpose, as do the other peopl...

canadianguy · canadianguy

Reading posts recently about whether or not our actions are enabling - reminded me of an old post of mine, with some awesome reminders from one of the leaders in the field - Toby Rice Drews (author of the Getting Them Sober series of books). She has an awesome, gentle, supportive way of saying so much - I...

DavidG · DavidG

Hi Y'all, I borrowed the title off of another member... My own take was a little boat sailing out into the surf. What I didn't say was that my sister and two brothers were on the boat with crowbars- ramming holes in the bottom. Or that is how it feels like to me. Not only am I affected, but I am surrounded with...

a4l · a4l

It's been a painful year. Painful in the ego sense I guess and my little people have had to endure a really tired mother. I feel at times really close to giving up, usually when I am confronted with huge mountains of washing, a bar of laundry soap and my two hands. I get a case of the "poor me's" and the "wh...

Carla61 · Carla61

I love my husband, don't get me wrong, I'm just done with the lies . I can support him when he is sober, but when he drinks, I just want to ignore him. Am I wrong? Please help me.

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! Today's reading in Courage to Change is about compassion. The author shares that at first, they did not know what compassion was, but they could identify what it was not. Compassion was not seeking revenge, holding a grudge, calling names, throwing things, etc. So the author began to try...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Posting for tomorrow - I've got golf plans... The reading in courage talks about how we suggest concentrating on our similarities instead of our differences. When we remember why we are all here, we need never feel alone. We do have differences and there is no reason they should not be acknowledged...

PosiesandPuppies · PosiesandPuppies

I have been thinking about something for about a week. Using my tools, etc. The latest I have settled on is, "When in doubt don't." The crazy thing is, I am having doubts about that! LOL! Today is my Ex's birthday. Last week his mother invited myself and Kid to a birthday get-together at her house this Su...

serenity47 · serenity47

I am feeling sad and frustrated today. My grown children whom have always been very close growing up are having a major falling out. We had attended the funeral of my sons young friend yesterday (age 18). My grown AD came to support her brother but that support was rejected by him. I know he is hurti...

hotrod · hotrod

Yhe ODAT reading for Oct 2 speaks about. Al-Anon being a fellowship of equals.The reading points out the danger of having a "managing controlling person directing the meetings. The discussion goes on to explain that if we were not a fellowship of equals no one would be free enough to think or a...

Lyne · Lyne

Chaos: The writer discusses the warning signs that their life has become unmanageable --racing thoughts going through their mind at an alarming speed--memories, broken promises, future fears, failed expectations, etc. Yet serenity is easily attainable with a phone call, acknowledgement o...

Bo · Bo

Some recent threads started me thinking -- when denial breaks, recovery and getting better, and gratitude -- made me think about all of these things. This Sunday is the anniversary of the death of a very good friend. While I met him "in the rooms" and some people here may not appreciate or relate to that...

A nother · A nother

So, I had a migraine this week. A worse than normal one for me. The day after the pain went I told him that I understood that he couldn't stop drinking. This was part of a bigger conversation about how I don't want to have to talk to him about his drinking or our relationship when he has been drinking (on Tues...

DavidG · DavidG

Hi y'all... I run towards the roar means I face things head on, right? My picture is much more gentle and sedate. I picture a wooden rowing boat heading out through the surf to open water. I have to keep alert and have a good hold on both oars. I just keep the prow of the boat facing into the waves. I ke...

hotrod · hotrod

ODAT reading for 9-29 reviews the slogan "Listen and learn": It reminds us that "Listen and learn is a sound doctrine, if we use it well. We do not make significant progress in our thinking if we're only listening to ourselves talk.and one of its quotes:"I pray that I may learn from listening whet...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about forgiveness, expectations, acceptance. The writer describes approaching his/her father to describe the hurt associated with growing up in an alcoholic home. The writer imagined airing out these hurts and hearing an apology (this was an expectat...

ling · ling

Hi AH has been with friends living away for a couple of weeks to rehab. He has no money should I send him some or is ithat enabling?

MellyBobelly · MellyBobelly

Hey guys. Thought I'd check in and say hi. How is everyone? I'm good, a little stressed at the mo as tomorrow I have to drive to the middle of nowhere and do camping The kid wanted to go to this particular music festival and of course I don't have the $$ to buy tickets so I volunteered us almost a year ago to d...

Freetime · Freetime

In Courage to Change, September 28, the writer proposed an idea to a home group business meeting. The group conscience did not vote in favor of the idea, but did vote to support another person's proposal. The writer let go of the feelings of wounded pride by remembering to Place Principles above Pers...

Temple · Temple

I am printing the entire thread on When Denial Breaks. What a lovely group of people are here. I am constantly amazed at the wisdom and compassion and generosity you all possess. . I think that whatever problem one might have, reading the entire thread will give direction, clues, answers. And I...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Tomorrow's reading is another reminder for us to focus on just one day at a time - this very day. I really like the quote from Just For Today --- "Just for today I will try to live through this day only, and not tackle all my problems at once." The reminder -- An old maxim says, "It'll shine when it shines."...

MellyBobelly · MellyBobelly

Hello MIP! It's been a long time since I visited here. I hope everyone is well! I don't spend much time online these days as it seems to take me to a bad place when I do, I tend to hide in my computer instead of dealing with things. It was probably fairly obvious that I had a lot of work to do on myself and I wasn't...

bud · bud

I'm really struggling this month... ... as one enormous thing resolves, another enormous brick wall crops up as if on cue. A work colleague called me today and let me know that he doesn't agree with my approach and had already let our mutual clients know. It wasn't a conversation he wasn't interested i...

Jozie · Jozie

Hi Family :) I Remember when I Landed here 10 yrs ago, I was coming to save my Baby brother from this disease, after just losing my Afather to it... I am the Older sister, so in my Family I was more of a Mother to him then his Sister, (I'm 6 yrs older) and as Children in our alcoholic home, My Mom worked anywhere...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	The Wisdom to Know the Difference (Preview) This is what I've been praying about these days. I answered a few posts here tonight but not much to offer to others right now. It's hard to sit with things over which you have little to no control. I have worked through many of the feelings concerning the ending of my job. I received unemployment, have ap...	tiredtonite	15	2332	Oct 17, 2018 by Jen61
	Recovering from injury (Preview) Hi everybody Hi everybody I just wanted to stop in and say hello And tell you that last Saturday I had a very very bad back spasm, it was so bad by Sunday I could not even get around. Dressing myself to get to urgent care was sheer agony I had to go to emergency care and found this really wonderful Doctor Wh...	mamalioness	12	2383	Oct 17, 2018 by PosiesandPuppies
	Courage to Change October 17, 2018 (Preview) In today's reading, the author reflects on expectations that many newcomers have for AlAnon. Many of us may have been governed by a strict rule of order as a way to feel that we had some control living with the disease of Alcoholism. We may have expected a program as successful as AlAnon to be even more ri...	Skorpi	5	1025	Oct 17, 2018 by a4l
	Broken Relationship - Any Advice (Preview) Hi, I have yet to start the steps of alanon however, I have attended a few meetings. My on Ana doff boyfriend of four years just came back from rehab two weeks ago. Throughout our whole relationship he had promised to get help or get better and I kept holding onto his promises that never came true. Eventua...	SoulSearcher	2	3073	Oct 17, 2018 by Skorpi
	having a crap day send me some ESH (Preview) Hi everyone Having a period of ups and downs. Mostly downs or flatligning. Just could do with some esh please. Sad when you realise situations won't change eh and you just gotta get on with things for the short term until you can get out. X	jitsuka	9	857	Oct 17, 2018 by jitsuka
	ODAT reading 10-16 (Preview) The odat reading for October 16 speaks about the negative coping tools that we develop when living with the disease of alcoholism. It points out that alanon is a fellowship of equals and that those who come to meetings with feelings of superiority often find that the people that they judge harsh...	hotrod	6	744	Oct 17, 2018 by a4l
	C2C, 10/15 (Preview) Forgiveness: Today's reading talks about the most loving form of detachment, which is forgiveness. It doesn't wipe the slate clean, or pronounce someone "not guilty." Forgiveness cuts the strings of resentment that bind them to a problem or past hurt. By releasing resentment, you set yoursel...	Lyne	7	2392	Oct 16, 2018 by PosiesandPuppies
	Checking in and more custody questions (Preview) Hi MIP! I'm just checking in to post a custody question and a quick update on my life. I love reading this board daily, it keeps me grounded and everyone here is so inspiring and following the principles of this program keeps me centred. I just moved into my new house and life is finally really coming toge...	VickiR	7	3120	Oct 16, 2018 by VickiR
	I think I just need a hug (Preview) there is absolutely ZERO that anyone can do about this and I think the stress of it caused my major back spasm lately my BIGGEST client has not been doing well...Bad decisions by the dad, doing really ill advised financial moves, its been bad of late (last 2 years) but when lenders don't wanna lend them a...	mamalioness	9	2712	Oct 16, 2018 by mamalioness
	C2C 13/10/2018 (Preview) Greetings MIP family. Today's Courage to Change reading speaks of awareness bought to the authors' attention through attending meetings. The action to change includes the use of the slogans, and todays reading features a beautiful example of "Easy does it" as a new response to frustration prev...	a4l	6	2241	Oct 16, 2018 by mamalioness
	So I had a visitor yesterday. (Preview) Growing up I only had my mom as my dad passed away at an early age. So I have my "uncle" who is technically not related to me in anyway but him and my mom grew up together so wherever we were he would move in with us every few years to help my mom out with babysitting and being an alcoholic himself...they got alo...	Pol	7	2400	Oct 15, 2018 by Pol
	The Miracles of Recovery (Preview) Thirty-one years ago on the Sunday past, I ended up at a treatment center. I can readily admit that I did NOT go voluntarily; I had a nudge from a judge as I had two serious court cases/charges against me from 2 different states. I tied on the biggest 'one' possible on that day, thus consider 10/8 as my so...	Iamhere	14	3477	Oct 15, 2018 by serenity47
	Update .. in a weird place (Preview) I haven't heard from my friend and I don't think I will mostly because I believe if she's not in the hospital she is in a rehab facility and I have doubts if she is still in the throws of the disease even when she gets out she will not contact me. I understand the shame and self pity for lack of a better term. S...	SerenityRUS	6	815	Oct 15, 2018 by andromeda
	Hi All - New Member (Preview) Hello, I am new to the forum and wanted to say hi. I heard about the forum today via my husband's therapist. Today, for the first time ever, he asked me if I would join him for his therapy session. He started seeing a therapist within the last month after our fighting over his use got especially bad. I am th...	GrpThrpy41	9	2923	Oct 15, 2018 by jitsuka
	I survived! (Preview) I saw my mom & survived the visit. I was so worried about what she might say about the past. She is in an assisted living center for mentally I'll people. She is doing well but me I feel anxiety because of the visit. It was too close to home	Hoot Nanny	4	2856	Oct 14, 2018 by PosiesandPuppies
	Hope for Today October 14 (Preview) good morning everyone- Today's reading is about the relationship we have w our HP and how sometimes we may question it or the strength of the connection there. The writer mentions that after the loss of his parents he also felt the loss of his connection w God, or at least felt an abandonment at that tim...	yanksfan51	2	2504	Oct 14, 2018 by Iamhere
	Alanon tools for dignity (Preview) I knew better but still have old unhealthy patterns of being conflict avoidant at any cost. I've recently been shocked at a "friend's" behavior towards me name calling, standing me up for plans and after I'm there sending a lame text "I'm out having fun with X, hope you're not upset." She had borrowed e...	bud	13	2662	Oct 12, 2018 by bud
	ODAT 10/12/18 (Preview) One Day At a Time in Al-Anon, October 12, is the fable of a woman who kept her alcoholic husband and her three teenage children under her Enormous Thumb. Because they were stuck under the Enormous Thumb, the husband and kids were flattened and could not do any growing up. The woman was a Very Nice Lady, wh...	Freetime	10	2511	Oct 12, 2018 by Pol
	C2C 10-9 (Preview) The C2C reading for October 9 speaks about our attitudes towards God.,prior to entering program. The reading suggests that many of us looked at God as an adversary and refused to reach out for help. I can so identify with that feeling. When the pain of addiction became too much, the reading indi...	hotrod	6	1976	Oct 12, 2018 by hotrod
	Courage to Change 10/11/18 (Preview) Today's reading discusses how many of us tend to look for answers by over-analyzing with often black/white thinking. Many of us, when new to Al-Anon, were asked to learn about the disease of alcoholism. Many of us again sought to read, study, analyze all that we could on the subject. We then began t...	Iamhere	6	2871	Oct 12, 2018 by mamalioness
	Boundaries and trying to stay in my lane (Preview) Hi - Im struggling with a situation and would welcome any ESH. i have been separated from my X-AH for 5 years, divorced for 1.5 yrs. his drinking and Xanax use were big issues. he was a zombie or mean and biting for the last few years. Denied having a proglem with substances. Refused to get help or do couns...	norasq	14	1435	Oct 11, 2018 by Pol
	Baby steps (Preview) My AH is adopted And met many of his brothers and sisters through ancestry.com. These people are in town tonight and he wants to have dinner with them I'm ok with that. However he texted me to call his IOP program to tell them he will not be there tonight because of a work crisis. I told him to call them hims...	Carla61	13	1034	Oct 11, 2018 by Pol
	Step meetings (Preview) Hi all, I am a grateful member of Al-Anon. We have a step meeting in our city, which is really helpful for recovery. We have been recently getting into the discussion, how much we can deviate from the step (one step a month, say, step 9 for September). I first thought, the step is like a topic in any other Al...	pikelpak	4	824	Oct 10, 2018 by pikelpak
	it's come to this: ex-AH has liver failure and is on hospice (Preview) I knew his path must be taking him here, but it picked up speed so quickly that it is shocking. Unlike many A's, he has not been in and out of the ER or had multiple medical emergencies... hadn't been to a dr in over three years, and now he is in a nursing home and his body is shutting down from liver and kidney...	oceanpine	28	1035	Oct 10, 2018 by Jazzie18
	The addiction of Drama (Preview) I consider myself new to alanon because I feel I don't have it down yet like other long time members do. But the trouble I'm having is that I don't know if I want to stick to the program. The reason I joined alanon was because alcoholism has effected me and is still continuing to do its damage. Because of thi...	Pol	10	931	Oct 10, 2018 by Bo
	Courage to Change October 10 (Preview) Good morning MIP! Today's reading in Courage to Change is about accepting what we cannot change and changing what we can. The author shares that, as a child, they used to cling to the door handle of the car when the car went around a sharp curve so as to prevent the car from going over the edge. Of course,...	Skorpi	4	725	Oct 10, 2018 by PosiesandPuppies
	Hope for Today Oct 7 (Preview) Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is both about the unique relationship of sponsor/sponsee and the gift of hearing and listening to our HPs will. The writer describes how early in the program as he/she was without a sponsor, the perception of the person who would one day become the sponsor was t...	yanksfan51	4	2076	Oct 9, 2018 by DavidG
	This Disease runs Deeper then any Bloodline... (Preview) Boy this Disease I Swear sits like a Gargoyle on a Post Waiting to Attack at any moment in my Family... One of the Hardest things I have had to work on thru my Own addiction is "Judgment" In my Family Everyone Judges Everyone (Mostly Based on Opinion) Never on Honest Truth, because Honestly I don't know...	Jozie	4	591	Oct 9, 2018 by Jozie
	Changing relationships .. (Preview) This is along the lines of another poster who spoke of "the lies". My understanding of the disease of addiction is it will do anything to survive and if given a place to hide it will remain stagnated however active in thought and deed. That doesn't mean out right confrontation is a solution .. althou...	SerenityRUS	9	706	Oct 8, 2018 by andromeda
	Made amends thank God (Preview) I learned on Friday that a childhood friend died from breast cancer. I had little contact with her in my adult life, but did send a yearly birthday and holiday card. About two years ago we talked about making amends in my F2F meeting, and I realized with all the amends I had made, I owed her one. I didn't w...	Lyne	7	610	Oct 8, 2018 by JerryF
	C2C, 10/8 (Preview) Recovery, miracles, and gratitude: The writer points out that in spite of frustration, anger, disappointment, and anxiety, brought forth from coping with a loved one's alcoholism , they could still learn to live a serene and happy life. The writer says that this alone is a miracle, and by practic...	Lyne	6	515	Oct 8, 2018 by Pol
	Faith & Money (Preview) This reading from "The Language of Letting Go," By M. Beattie jumped out at me, and stuck with me throughout my day. So much so that I asked permission to post it. I think it may help others who like me, find themselves in the "second-half" of their life and are without their spouse who was the main bread-w...	PosiesandPuppies	2	645	Oct 8, 2018 by Iamhere
	Problem child update (it's been awhile) (Preview) Hi there! I've had a couple of good months with daughter making some progress. But, alas, the peaceful period of time is over. Again. She had a job but lost it. Moved in with a guy she had just met and, amazingly, it was going pretty well. This guy was her age (28) and was a father at 18. His Father had to sen...	RachelsMom	7	642	Oct 8, 2018 by Jozie
	taking a walk (Preview) In about an hour I am going to take a walk with my brother who abused me in childhood into teen years. I have decided that besides for his bad health heart-wise, that it may help me overcome my PTSD if I can be with him and feel in control. All my work in program has brought me to this point of strength and con...	Lyne	9	647	Oct 6, 2018 by hotrod
	God's Will (Preview) Im thinking more and more about step 3 and God's will for me. I feel step 3 is a really important step and my understanding is becoming deeper. 'Made a decision to turn our will and our life over to the care of God as we understood him.' I can see that I have made the decision over the years without fully under...	el-cee	8	865	Oct 6, 2018 by JerryF
	C2C 10/6/2018 (Preview) Greetings MIP family. Today's reading speaks about how growth in recovery is an ongoing process and opportunity. "Although the crisis that bought us to Alanon may be past, there is always something new to learn, even after years of recovery".I am reminded in this reading of my own perspective tow...	a4l	4	568	Oct 6, 2018 by PosiesandPuppies
	Courage to Change 10/5/18 (Preview) This page talks about replacing negativity with gratitude for the positive qualities in ourselves, our circumstances, and other human beings. Negativity keeps our life at a standstill. The writer believes they have a beautiful spirit that has been created for some purpose, as do the other peopl...	Freetime	6	592	Oct 5, 2018 by Iamhere
	Labels of enabler or codependent..... (Preview) Reading posts recently about whether or not our actions are enabling - reminded me of an old post of mine, with some awesome reminders from one of the leaders in the field - Toby Rice Drews (author of the Getting Them Sober series of books). She has an awesome, gentle, supportive way of saying so much - I...	canadianguy	7	789	Oct 5, 2018 by Pol
	"I run towards the roar..." ... II (Preview) Hi Y'all, I borrowed the title off of another member... My own take was a little boat sailing out into the surf. What I didn't say was that my sister and two brothers were on the boat with crowbars- ramming holes in the bottom. Or that is how it feels like to me. Not only am I affected, but I am surrounded with...	DavidG	9	1060	Oct 5, 2018 by Bo
	Needing to start again. Again! lol (Preview) It's been a painful year. Painful in the ego sense I guess and my little people have had to endure a really tired mother. I feel at times really close to giving up, usually when I am confronted with huge mountains of washing, a bar of laundry soap and my two hands. I get a case of the "poor me's" and the "wh...	a4l	8	657	Oct 5, 2018 by hotrod
	The lies (Preview) I love my husband, don't get me wrong, I'm just done with the lies . I can support him when he is sober, but when he drinks, I just want to ignore him. Am I wrong? Please help me.	Carla61	13	748	Oct 4, 2018 by Jen61
	Courage to Change October 3 2018 (Preview) Hello MIP! Today's reading in Courage to Change is about compassion. The author shares that at first, they did not know what compassion was, but they could identify what it was not. Compassion was not seeking revenge, holding a grudge, calling names, throwing things, etc. So the author began to try...	Skorpi	7	565	Oct 4, 2018 by serenity47
	Courage to Change 10/4/18 (Preview) Posting for tomorrow - I've got golf plans... The reading in courage talks about how we suggest concentrating on our similarities instead of our differences. When we remember why we are all here, we need never feel alone. We do have differences and there is no reason they should not be acknowledged...	Iamhere	3	819	Oct 4, 2018 by Skorpi
	I think I need help with the way I feel (Preview) I have been thinking about something for about a week. Using my tools, etc. The latest I have settled on is, "When in doubt don't." The crazy thing is, I am having doubts about that! LOL! Today is my Ex's birthday. Last week his mother invited myself and Kid to a birthday get-together at her house this Su...	PosiesandPuppies	17	749	Oct 3, 2018 by Iamhere
	Stress and grief shines a light on the fractures in the family (Preview) I am feeling sad and frustrated today. My grown children whom have always been very close growing up are having a major falling out. We had attended the funeral of my sons young friend yesterday (age 18). My grown AD came to support her brother but that support was rejected by him. I know he is hurti...	serenity47	9	803	Oct 2, 2018 by Iamhere
	ODAT Reading 10-2 (Preview) Yhe ODAT reading for Oct 2 speaks about. Al-Anon being a fellowship of equals.The reading points out the danger of having a "managing controlling person directing the meetings. The discussion goes on to explain that if we were not a fellowship of equals no one would be free enough to think or a...	hotrod	3	538	Oct 2, 2018 by Iamhere
	C2C, 10/1 (Preview) Chaos: The writer discusses the warning signs that their life has become unmanageable --racing thoughts going through their mind at an alarming speed--memories, broken promises, future fears, failed expectations, etc. Yet serenity is easily attainable with a phone call, acknowledgement o...	Lyne	11	647	Oct 1, 2018 by Iamhere
	Denial? Recovery? Gratitude? (Preview) Some recent threads started me thinking -- when denial breaks, recovery and getting better, and gratitude -- made me think about all of these things. This Sunday is the anniversary of the death of a very good friend. While I met him "in the rooms" and some people here may not appreciate or relate to that...	Bo	15	748	Oct 1, 2018 by Bo
	Did I enable him? (Preview) So, I had a migraine this week. A worse than normal one for me. The day after the pain went I told him that I understood that he couldn't stop drinking. This was part of a bigger conversation about how I don't want to have to talk to him about his drinking or our relationship when he has been drinking (on Tues...	A nother	14	840	Oct 1, 2018 by Bo
	"I run towards the roar..." ... (Preview) Hi y'all... I run towards the roar means I face things head on, right? My picture is much more gentle and sedate. I picture a wooden rowing boat heading out through the surf to open water. I have to keep alert and have a good hold on both oars. I just keep the prow of the boat facing into the waves. I ke...	DavidG	20	1908	Oct 1, 2018 by bud
	ODAT 9-29 (Preview) ODAT reading for 9-29 reviews the slogan "Listen and learn": It reminds us that "Listen and learn is a sound doctrine, if we use it well. We do not make significant progress in our thinking if we're only listening to ourselves talk.and one of its quotes:"I pray that I may learn from listening whet...	hotrod	5	600	Sep 30, 2018 by mamalioness
	Hope for Today Sept 30 (Preview) Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about forgiveness, expectations, acceptance. The writer describes approaching his/her father to describe the hurt associated with growing up in an alcoholic home. The writer imagined airing out these hurts and hearing an apology (this was an expectat...	yanksfan51	5	539	Sep 30, 2018 by mamalioness
	money money money (Preview) Hi AH has been with friends living away for a couple of weeks to rehab. He has no money should I send him some or is ithat enabling?	ling	6	728	Sep 30, 2018 by Bo
	Hey Hey kids, it's Mel. (Preview) Hey guys. Thought I'd check in and say hi. How is everyone? I'm good, a little stressed at the mo as tomorrow I have to drive to the middle of nowhere and do camping The kid wanted to go to this particular music festival and of course I don't have the $$ to buy tickets so I volunteered us almost a year ago to d...	MellyBobelly	28	1434	Sep 30, 2018 by lookingup
	C2C 9/28/18 -- Letting Go (Preview) In Courage to Change, September 28, the writer proposed an idea to a home group business meeting. The group conscience did not vote in favor of the idea, but did vote to support another person's proposal. The writer let go of the feelings of wounded pride by remembering to Place Principles above Pers...	Freetime	5	654	Sep 28, 2018 by Bo
	Gratitude (Preview) I am printing the entire thread on When Denial Breaks. What a lovely group of people are here. I am constantly amazed at the wisdom and compassion and generosity you all possess. . I think that whatever problem one might have, reading the entire thread will give direction, clues, answers. And I...	Temple	6	646	Sep 27, 2018 by mamalioness
	Courage to Change 9/27/18 (Preview) Tomorrow's reading is another reminder for us to focus on just one day at a time - this very day. I really like the quote from Just For Today --- "Just for today I will try to live through this day only, and not tackle all my problems at once." The reminder -- An old maxim says, "It'll shine when it shines."...	Iamhere	6	650	Sep 27, 2018 by hotrod
	Hellooo (Preview) Hello MIP! It's been a long time since I visited here. I hope everyone is well! I don't spend much time online these days as it seems to take me to a bad place when I do, I tend to hide in my computer instead of dealing with things. It was probably fairly obvious that I had a lot of work to do on myself and I wasn't...	MellyBobelly	13	690	Sep 27, 2018 by Temple
	Abusive coworker - ESH needed for next right step please (Preview) I'm really struggling this month... ... as one enormous thing resolves, another enormous brick wall crops up as if on cue. A work colleague called me today and let me know that he doesn't agree with my approach and had already let our mutual clients know. It wasn't a conversation he wasn't interested i...	bud	14	717	Sep 27, 2018 by Jen61
	The Moment I Felt the Shift... (Preview) Hi Family :) I Remember when I Landed here 10 yrs ago, I was coming to save my Baby brother from this disease, after just losing my Afather to it... I am the Older sister, so in my Family I was more of a Mother to him then his Sister, (I'm 6 yrs older) and as Children in our alcoholic home, My Mom worked anywhere...	Jozie	7	687	Sep 27, 2018 by PosiesandPuppies
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