Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

cmw2429 · cmw2429

Yesterday was our 39th Wedding Anniversary. No presents, no "happy anniversary", yes a lunch out but it really could have been any other day of the year. The only mention in relation to our Wedding Day was about the difference in weather! I think I'm finally accepting that life is nothing like I want...

ThreeCmom · ThreeCmom

Hi, I'm new to the site and could use some advice & wanted to see if anyone else has been in the same or similar situation and what your outcome was. After 17.5 years of marriage, my AH & I are in the middle of a divorce. He has been an alcoholic/addict our entire marriage with the addictions spira...

lgnutah · lgnutah

Is there no meeting tonight?

StargazerLily · StargazerLily

I've got a few updates and I want to talk about what's going on currently. I enjoy being able to use this platform to sort of chronicle my progress and set backs. Today was the last day of school for my son. He is eight and just finished the second grade. These transitions are really hard for me. Adjusting t...

lookingup · lookingup

These 3 things irritate me cause I feel that I can't work them or make them work for me,I have a hard time saying no,and setting boundaries or standing my ground these are all aimed at my abf was xabf,we have been getting along great he has slaved himself my yard ,got it looking beautiful,I feel like I'm l...

gingerfizz · gingerfizz

Hi all, it's been a long time. My AH has been dry for over 2 years. He did not do any recovery work. Things are certainly much calmer. He is nicer for the most part. No late night crazy drunk shenanigans. However, I am dealing with a lot of what I call "tests" in my mind from him and I am not sure if I am han...

Jerry F · Jerry F

and this morning I participated in another as I went to my AA home group..."By the Bay". I left our van to walk over to the cabana where we hold the group and recognized the station wagon we were next to...God!! Both RJ and his MOM clean and sober and the last time I saw her she could not even stand up much...

CyndiODAT · CyndiODAT

Hi all, I've mentioned my friend that I've been spending time with. I guess we are dating but it's more like 'hanging out' together. Not only does he drink straight whiskey on the rocks, he is also wierdly enmeshed with his sister and other family members. He is one of 9 siblings. He is very close wi...

joker · joker

This program is a miracle. Since my last post much has changed. The ABF stopped drinking. It was a terrible withdrawal-shaking, sweating, anxiety, sleeplessness, restlessness for 3 days straight. Its now been a month and he remains sober. He found beer and vodka, coolers in the house that I had hid a...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for June 18 speaks about what we often feel when we first enter program. Many of us are filled with anger and resentment because it appears other people's live are perfect and we envy what we think they have. The reading goes on to state that in time, after working the program...

milkwood · milkwood

I know that I shouldn't be angry about this, and usually when I feel angry it is because I am angry at myself but. Our relationship counsellor's response to my comment that I seemed to have had the emotional systems of PTSD was that my parents had problems and as a child I felt helpless. No mention of what...

Jennie72 · Jennie72

Im here because I need help dealing with my life. I haven't been to a meeting and think it would help so I need to get the courage to go. I've been married for 13 years. When we first met, my husband drank all night in the basement with his friend. He then slowed down for a while. He was going out once ever...

createive · createive

Hi, I found this in the "How Al-Anon Works" book. I feel so selfish feeling jealous over the time he spends between mettings and phone calls. And here's another dysfunction feeling I have, I feel worried he will meet an AA woman who has AA in common with him. I know he loves me and is the most dedicated man,...

KT2015 · KT2015

When things with my AH are not going well I am very good at detaching and that has been a wonderful gift of this program because he can be in any kind of mood and I am able to get on with my own life. I can do the things I need to do for myself. But my AH doesn't drink every day and goes through periods of not drin...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading talks about the basics of our program of recovery. We are helped by the program in times when we could not or can not do it on our own. We learn to lean on a Higher Power, live one day at a time and with faith and support, we find we can live and even grow through difficult times. Most of us fi...

Sarahcolorado · Sarahcolorado

Hi, I am new to this board and I started Al-Anon and therapy after I realized that my life has hit a physical and mental low dealing with a binge drinking alcoholic family member all of my life. Everytime he's not in a drinking phase everything seems fine and I keep feeling that I don't need to go to Al-an...

Lyne · Lyne

This month is my 3rd year anniversary. I love my f2f group but no one seems to care about their anniversary except for myself and one other member. So the two of us will do something special at one of our meetings. It could be because she and I are older. We haven't had years and years to get better. I spe...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Just a reminder for me to focus on what I am doing before I act on something. Prayer doesn't hurt either. Prayers change lives & give opportunity that otherwise may never happen. Just a quick thought.

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading is about detaching with love. The reminder and quote are very powerful ----- Today's reminder --- I am learning the difference between help and interference. Today I will examine the way I offer support. Today's quote --- "Detachment did not mean disinterest....I considered d...

Minniegirl · Minniegirl

My parents were alcoholic. I.ve seen my father so drunk he xouldn.t stand. I.ve seen my mother cry and pray and try to fix him. I.ve seen my father try to kill himself with a gun. I.ve seen my father push my mother around and us kids defending our mother. I.ve seen my father soil himself, be arrested,...

Jennyp · Jennyp

Just needing to share. Last night after another " I'll be home in half an hour" which turned into 4 hours coming home drunk,I think I finally realized I'll be ok on my own. If it comes to that, I will be incredibly sad and heartbroken but will survive. Had a good rational sober talk with him today and I know h...

Lsh8175 · Lsh8175

Hi. this is my first time posting something but I really don't know where else to turn. My husband is an alcoholic. We have 3 beautiful boys and have been together for almost 8 years now. In the past 2 years he has been in and out of rehab twice. The last time I really thought he had it. He was sober for six mont...

miamid47 · miamid47

Good morning! I am a 53 year old woman that has been dating an alcoholic for 8 years. He has always been what is called a "functioning" alcoholic until the past six months. The roller coaster has been rough but now it is becoming a dangerous ride. I am in fear of getting into any vehicle with him. I hav...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

Ok .. I have discovered because things are not going at rocket speed .. I'm not comfortable with letting someone else set the pace. At the same time .. grrr .. I do not like the whole dating game stuff. I'm a little on lock down at the moment out of sheer stubbornness .. I figure I sent the last text so he can...

DontWantToBeHere · DontWantToBeHere

I don't know where to start. I've been with my fiance for about 2 and a half years. He was sober when we got together and started using behind my back sometime within the past 6 months. Things have come to a head recently where he lost his home and job. He is staying with his mother who is very into AA and Al-An...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Today's c2c talk about the use of sarcasm as a weapon, noting that it does nothing to help fix the problems in a relationship or interaction; it might provide a temporary bit of satisfaction but in the long run does more harm than good. The reading suggests that when feeling frustrated with a person or s...

YARNCRAZY · YARNCRAZY

again,crapped on by the world...i did everything possible at new job and still boss not pleased and oh..forgot to tell me id be lid off in a day or two anyway cause they are moving office to manhatten beach way way to far to get to by bus or train. ...so in 6mths only able to get 11/2 wks of work ...money tight...

ghen7865 · ghen7865

Our 28 year old son is a alcoholic and drug addict. His wife had a baby a little over a year ago and he stopped all of his bad ugly habits. He was in a accident and got put on Tramadol, and you can guess the rest of the story. He has been drinking again and his personality is ugly. We talked to him about the pai...

Lyne · Lyne

Good morning~I am still dumbfounded, and I shouldn't be any longer, when my A looks straight into my eyes and tells me a bold-faced lie. She says she loves me, she wants to stay married, she will work harder, but I don't see any work. Her toolbox is lying, sneaking, deception, self-destruction, rati...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I noticed that the courage to change reading is not posted today. I feel like that I am working the 12th step on a daily basis & that it is not for me to try to change everyone to think the way I do but to carry the message to others whether they are in program or not. I have had the spiritual awakening that I...

Miller · Miller

I have had several people say that one thing I need to do for AA-Husband is to cut off access to his money. Since all is quite tied up (and we are a community property state), I'd like to hear how some other folks have been able to do this. Cut debit card - he got new. Do I just close check account and give him all...

Mirandac · Mirandac

I am glad message board is back up, thank you hugs

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good Morning MIP: Today's reading is about trust, and turning things over to our HP. The writer speaks to the idea behind the phrase 'came to believe' from Step 2, and it made me think of the decision we make to trust and have faith. I always believed, but making the decision to believe and to trust tha...

Minniegirl · Minniegirl

Why is it that I keep beating a dead horse. I never seem to learn. I.ve been married to my AH for 28 years now. And come from a family of drinkers. I guess it.s what I know and maybe comfortable with. This website is great and i.ve been here before. But then I quit coming. I have it in my head that I can st...

John · John

Thanks to Betty, erin, and ken ours site hosting cost is now covered for a year again. Thank each of you for stepping forward and helping me with this situation. I have spent the last few weeks pretty sick with a 3 day stay in hospital, so things just got away from me completely. Now trying to bring things b...

John · John

Dear Friends, I finally started to get some medical help with my daily anxiety attacks, plus bad diarrhea as a symptom of the anxiety attacks, severe depression, chronic fatigue, and my respiratory system being so bad. I was in the hospital for 3 days just a few weeks ago. It appears that most everythi...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Funerals stink! 52 sad, mentally ill, sad, drug addict sad, alcoholic sad. SUICIDE, sad. What more can I say? I can relate to the mental illness part. It is just so sad that people who really didn't know her thought she was the crazy lady in our town. I am not much different. If I had the addictions that she...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Today's c2c refers to step 11, where we seek to improve conscious contact with our HP through prayer and meditation. The reading suggests that how we go about identifying our HP at work in our lives is up to us entirely but it is important that one way or another, we do so if we wish to have the courage to cha...

el-cee · el-cee

I learned in this program that when I put the word 'should' in front of anything Im about to say then Im being judgemental. Who am I to decide what another human being in this world (minus children) should be doing or not doing. If we are following this spiritual program then how do we know what is right or w...

newleaf66 · newleaf66

Hello all, I've not posted in quite awhile but am reaching out to you all for support. I am married 25 years to my AH. We go round and round the alcohol merry-go-round. The lies, being impaired when I expect him to care for the children, driving under the influence, avoidance, smoothing over...polite r...

blindsided · blindsided

My AH is really wearing me down. He tells me he has had a good life and is ready to die, so will not quit drinking. He is mentally abusive to me. He snaps at me all the time. He has urine and bowel incontinence, back problems, heart problems, emphysema (keeps smoking). I can't help it, but sometimes I j...

Jerry F · Jerry F

You all get an A for the proper answer....I get tired of loosing control because of a basketball game thousands of miles away, completely out of my control is being played and referred not to my liking...good I got u p from the sofa and left the room because I still don't do judgement and active resentm...

Dinger045 · Dinger045

Before you read this I want you to know that I write this today for my healing and my coping with having lived with an addict. This is not here to tell you how to feel, or how to make a decision in your life, and it is by no means direction on how to deal with living with an addict. This is just my story, that I fe...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

Ohhh I'm in such an ornery mood. I'm sitting in Starbucks at the big table and this young woman sat down at the big table I'm at which honestly don't care about that however RUDE MUCH!? She has slammed things trying to get my attention and let me know she's irritated that I have the nerve to use two of the p...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for June 12 speaks about the 10th step and suggest making it part of our daily routine as It is a gentle, warm and loving way to take care of ourselves. The steps help us to learn that living one day at a time, facing all issues honestly and with courage we will grow in spirituality and co...

Mirandac · Mirandac

i am a member of recovering doormats and proud of it. It took me a long time in alanon to get there though. I was very glad i could stand up for me by the time my xah left. i was ready for the fallout and Emotionally stronger to cope. i still struggle with my emotional sobriety that is a work in process. I still...

hotrod · hotrod

http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t62267347/alanon-step-11-6-12-2016/

gabigail · gabigail

Hi everyone- My spouse has been sober now 28 days. Part of that was in the hospital, but she's been really committed to not drink and trying to make herself healthy, talking to a counselor and working on healing. She is still very sick physically and looks it still. It's a hard road. Anyway, she's come c...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Going to be lounging in Central Valley CA. for 3 weeks soon so I will be off of the board unless I bum my wife's IPad or something. Understand I am not a Continental U.S. person and even while I have family relatives living there I just am not into it. I will not complain. I am an island boy surrounded by...

poptart · poptart

I think my boyfriend may be alcoholic. He has a high stress c-suite job. He drinks 750ml of either tequila or bourbon in 2 nights. But he never gets violent or even angry. He gets up and goes to work every morning. So I question that I even question him. He slurs and stumbles. It worries me because I fear f...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

I did it....the house is up for sale. First step to a new life Thank you all!!

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for June 11 talks about Step Nine. In this step we are asked to make direct amends to people we have injured. The reading points out the logical progression of the Steps, as it is in Step 8 where we learn what making "amends" means and become willing .to do so. Since these amends ar...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Good morning MIP family.....I type this morning with only one eye - my right eye is swollen shut. Yesterday, I went out to play softball - it is a program league and usually very fun and even spiritual. I was pitching and a guy hit a line shot back at me - I did not get the glove up and it tagged me hard on the fo...

MrsW · MrsW

I'm feeling lost and not sure if I'm the problem or if this is normal....my husband is a recovering alcoholic he did a 28 day inpatient and is now attending an outpatient program. He rarely shows me any affection since he's been home from rehab he came home the first week of May and we had sex twice the firs...

a4l · a4l

months ago, I really didn't know what colour of the sky was, I was so we wrapped up in insanity. Its amazing what even small changes can bring about and I'm grateful though still have a way to go. I was perpetually guilty feeling, always trying to accommodate crazy and not really even knowing why. The sma...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading in Courage to Change is about Step 8 - Made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all. Many of us look at this and pause, longer than necessary and many more are not ready/willing to consider making amends to some we have hurt. The reading suggests if...

Crau · Crau

Perspective taking is key to many things in my life. For me it helps to understand where people are coming from, where they have been and perhaps the motives behind their current choices. Having dated an alcoholic, who now is in recovery; I find this to be even more helpful as I try to navigate the rel...

SandyG · SandyG

I am really struggling with anger and sadness tonight. I have been working hard to work my program and put the focus on me tonight, but not doing a very good job of it. My AH was in recovery when we met and married so I never knew him as a drinker. In fact, he told me he didn't drink...he was in recovery from d...

El · El

My adult daughter is in recovery although I really have no idea if she has had any relapses. She suffers from depression and anxiety and has difficulty coping with even the smallest amount of stress. Even with medication she has struggled. I have really had to use detachment with love because for year...

Connie Sue · Connie Sue

Hello! I am Connie Sue. I first walked into the rooms of Al-Anon on April 3, 1995. I cried my first two years and was not sure of what I was getting myself into as it seemed that most everyone was happy! After deciding to get a sponsor, I took a leap of faith with beginning to learn and use the 12-Steps, I...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	When life is not what you dreamed it would be (Preview) Yesterday was our 39th Wedding Anniversary. No presents, no "happy anniversary", yes a lunch out but it really could have been any other day of the year. The only mention in relation to our Wedding Day was about the difference in weather! I think I'm finally accepting that life is nothing like I want...	cmw2429	6	694	Jun 19, 2016 by Iamhere
	I'm new & Struggling! (Preview) Hi, I'm new to the site and could use some advice & wanted to see if anyone else has been in the same or similar situation and what your outcome was. After 17.5 years of marriage, my AH & I are in the middle of a divorce. He has been an alcoholic/addict our entire marriage with the addictions spira...	ThreeCmom	10	692	Jun 19, 2016 by Iamhere
	Its 7 pm Sunday but no one is in Meeting Room (Preview) Is there no meeting tonight?	lgnutah	2	593	Jun 19, 2016 by Iamhere
	Some updates and my current mood (Preview) I've got a few updates and I want to talk about what's going on currently. I enjoy being able to use this platform to sort of chronicle my progress and set backs. Today was the last day of school for my son. He is eight and just finished the second grade. These transitions are really hard for me. Adjusting t...	StargazerLily	4	633	Jun 19, 2016 by Mattie
	Saying no,boundaries and taking up for self (Preview) These 3 things irritate me cause I feel that I can't work them or make them work for me,I have a hard time saying no,and setting boundaries or standing my ground these are all aimed at my abf was xabf,we have been getting along great he has slaved himself my yard ,got it looking beautiful,I feel like I'm l...	lookingup	1	472	Jun 19, 2016 by Tampa
	Dry drunk behaviors? H "testing" me. (Preview) Hi all, it's been a long time. My AH has been dry for over 2 years. He did not do any recovery work. Things are certainly much calmer. He is nicer for the most part. No late night crazy drunk shenanigans. However, I am dealing with a lot of what I call "tests" in my mind from him and I am not sure if I am han...	gingerfizz	11	5069	Jun 19, 2016 by Tampa
	I love watching and being a part of Miracles (Preview) and this morning I participated in another as I went to my AA home group..."By the Bay". I left our van to walk over to the cabana where we hold the group and recognized the station wagon we were next to...God!! Both RJ and his MOM clean and sober and the last time I saw her she could not even stand up much...	Jerry F	5	612	Jun 19, 2016 by hotrod
	I think I'm dating a double winner (Preview) Hi all, I've mentioned my friend that I've been spending time with. I guess we are dating but it's more like 'hanging out' together. Not only does he drink straight whiskey on the rocks, he is also wierdly enmeshed with his sister and other family members. He is one of 9 siblings. He is very close wi...	CyndiODAT	7	743	Jun 18, 2016 by Mattie
	Al-Anon works (Preview) This program is a miracle. Since my last post much has changed. The ABF stopped drinking. It was a terrible withdrawal-shaking, sweating, anxiety, sleeplessness, restlessness for 3 days straight. Its now been a month and he remains sober. He found beer and vodka, coolers in the house that I had hid a...	joker	5	580	Jun 18, 2016 by Jerry F
	Courage to Change Reading 6-18-2016 (Preview) The C2C reading for June 18 speaks about what we often feel when we first enter program. Many of us are filled with anger and resentment because it appears other people's live are perfect and we envy what we think they have. The reading goes on to state that in time, after working the program...	hotrod	3	1112	Jun 18, 2016 by Iamhere
	Spitting Nails... (Preview) I know that I shouldn't be angry about this, and usually when I feel angry it is because I am angry at myself but. Our relationship counsellor's response to my comment that I seemed to have had the emotional systems of PTSD was that my parents had problems and as a child I felt helpless. No mention of what...	milkwood	9	3600	Jun 18, 2016 by Iamhere
	I'm new and need help (Preview) Im here because I need help dealing with my life. I haven't been to a meeting and think it would help so I need to get the courage to go. I've been married for 13 years. When we first met, my husband drank all night in the basement with his friend. He then slowed down for a while. He was going out once ever...	Jennie72	11	705	Jun 17, 2016 by Iamhere
	He's finally sobe in AA and everything is going well for him. Why am I still so miserable? (Preview) Hi, I found this in the "How Al-Anon Works" book. I feel so selfish feeling jealous over the time he spends between mettings and phone calls. And here's another dysfunction feeling I have, I feel worried he will meet an AA woman who has AA in common with him. I know he loves me and is the most dedicated man,...	createive	2	597	Jun 17, 2016 by hotrod
	How to stay detached with love (Preview) When things with my AH are not going well I am very good at detaching and that has been a wonderful gift of this program because he can be in any kind of mood and I am able to get on with my own life. I can do the things I need to do for myself. But my AH doesn't drink every day and goes through periods of not drin...	KT2015	4	757	Jun 17, 2016 by kalorrah
	Courage to Change (C2C) 6/17/2016 (Preview) Today's reading talks about the basics of our program of recovery. We are helped by the program in times when we could not or can not do it on our own. We learn to lean on a Higher Power, live one day at a time and with faith and support, we find we can live and even grow through difficult times. Most of us fi...	Iamhere	2	518	Jun 17, 2016 by Hoot Nanny
	Dealing with a binge drinker (Preview) Hi, I am new to this board and I started Al-Anon and therapy after I realized that my life has hit a physical and mental low dealing with a binge drinking alcoholic family member all of my life. Everytime he's not in a drinking phase everything seems fine and I keep feeling that I don't need to go to Al-an...	Sarahcolorado	12	11335	Jun 17, 2016 by a4l
	Alanon anniversary (Preview) This month is my 3rd year anniversary. I love my f2f group but no one seems to care about their anniversary except for myself and one other member. So the two of us will do something special at one of our meetings. It could be because she and I are older. We haven't had years and years to get better. I spe...	Lyne	7	606	Jun 16, 2016 by Mirandac
	Focus then act. (Preview) Just a reminder for me to focus on what I am doing before I act on something. Prayer doesn't hurt either. Prayers change lives & give opportunity that otherwise may never happen. Just a quick thought.	Hoot Nanny	3	440	Jun 16, 2016 by hotrod
	Courage to Change (C2C) 6/16/2016 (Preview) Today's reading is about detaching with love. The reminder and quote are very powerful ----- Today's reminder --- I am learning the difference between help and interference. Today I will examine the way I offer support. Today's quote --- "Detachment did not mean disinterest....I considered d...	Iamhere	3	587	Jun 16, 2016 by hotrod
	What I have seen (Preview) My parents were alcoholic. I.ve seen my father so drunk he xouldn.t stand. I.ve seen my mother cry and pray and try to fix him. I.ve seen my father try to kill himself with a gun. I.ve seen my father push my mother around and us kids defending our mother. I.ve seen my father soil himself, be arrested,...	Minniegirl	7	589	Jun 16, 2016 by hotrod
	Had "the talk" (Preview) Just needing to share. Last night after another " I'll be home in half an hour" which turned into 4 hours coming home drunk,I think I finally realized I'll be ok on my own. If it comes to that, I will be incredibly sad and heartbroken but will survive. Had a good rational sober talk with him today and I know h...	Jennyp	5	754	Jun 16, 2016 by Jerry F
	Starting to lose hope (Preview) Hi. this is my first time posting something but I really don't know where else to turn. My husband is an alcoholic. We have 3 beautiful boys and have been together for almost 8 years now. In the past 2 years he has been in and out of rehab twice. The last time I really thought he had it. He was sober for six mont...	Lsh8175	6	612	Jun 16, 2016 by Jazzie18
	My Boyfriend (Preview) Good morning! I am a 53 year old woman that has been dating an alcoholic for 8 years. He has always been what is called a "functioning" alcoholic until the past six months. The roller coaster has been rough but now it is becoming a dangerous ride. I am in fear of getting into any vehicle with him. I hav...	miamid47	2	503	Jun 16, 2016 by Mirandac
	Dating .. (Preview) Ok .. I have discovered because things are not going at rocket speed .. I'm not comfortable with letting someone else set the pace. At the same time .. grrr .. I do not like the whole dating game stuff. I'm a little on lock down at the moment out of sheer stubbornness .. I figure I sent the last text so he can...	SerenityRUS	25	808	Jun 16, 2016 by SerenityRUS
	New and can't detach....I'm suffocating (Preview) I don't know where to start. I've been with my fiance for about 2 and a half years. He was sober when we got together and started using behind my back sometime within the past 6 months. Things have come to a head recently where he lost his home and job. He is staying with his mother who is very into AA and Al-An...	DontWantToBeHere	10	832	Jun 15, 2016 by Iamhere
	Courage To Change 15/6 (Preview) Today's c2c talk about the use of sarcasm as a weapon, noting that it does nothing to help fix the problems in a relationship or interaction; it might provide a temporary bit of satisfaction but in the long run does more harm than good. The reading suggests that when feeling frustrated with a person or s...	missmeliss	1	455	Jun 15, 2016 by Iamhere
	LAID OFF AGAIN (Preview) again,crapped on by the world...i did everything possible at new job and still boss not pleased and oh..forgot to tell me id be lid off in a day or two anyway cause they are moving office to manhatten beach way way to far to get to by bus or train. ...so in 6mths only able to get 11/2 wks of work ...money tight...	YARNCRAZY	5	558	Jun 15, 2016 by SerenityRUS
	addict son has started using pain pill and it out of control. (Preview) Our 28 year old son is a alcoholic and drug addict. His wife had a baby a little over a year ago and he stopped all of his bad ugly habits. He was in a accident and got put on Tramadol, and you can guess the rest of the story. He has been drinking again and his personality is ugly. We talked to him about the pai...	ghen7865	4	572	Jun 14, 2016 by ghen7865
	Lying right to my face (Preview) Good morning~I am still dumbfounded, and I shouldn't be any longer, when my A looks straight into my eyes and tells me a bold-faced lie. She says she loves me, she wants to stay married, she will work harder, but I don't see any work. Her toolbox is lying, sneaking, deception, self-destruction, rati...	Lyne	6	1033	Jun 14, 2016 by Jerry F
	Step 12 (Preview) I noticed that the courage to change reading is not posted today. I feel like that I am working the 12th step on a daily basis & that it is not for me to try to change everyone to think the way I do but to carry the message to others whether they are in program or not. I have had the spiritual awakening that I...	Hoot Nanny	2	423	Jun 14, 2016 by Iamhere
	Question on How to Cut off Access to Money (Preview) I have had several people say that one thing I need to do for AA-Husband is to cut off access to his money. Since all is quite tied up (and we are a community property state), I'd like to hear how some other folks have been able to do this. Cut debit card - he got new. Do I just close check account and give him all...	Miller	4	538	Jun 14, 2016 by Iamhere
	Yeah we are up (Preview) I am glad message board is back up, thank you hugs	Mirandac	3	519	Jun 14, 2016 by Iamhere
	Hope for Today June 14 (Preview) Good Morning MIP: Today's reading is about trust, and turning things over to our HP. The writer speaks to the idea behind the phrase 'came to believe' from Step 2, and it made me think of the decision we make to trust and have faith. I always believed, but making the decision to believe and to trust tha...	yanksfan51	3	498	Jun 14, 2016 by Iamhere
	One more time (Preview) Why is it that I keep beating a dead horse. I never seem to learn. I.ve been married to my AH for 28 years now. And come from a family of drinkers. I guess it.s what I know and maybe comfortable with. This website is great and i.ve been here before. But then I quit coming. I have it in my head that I can st...	Minniegirl	5	505	Jun 14, 2016 by KennyFenderjazz
	Site back up (Preview) Thanks to Betty, erin, and ken ours site hosting cost is now covered for a year again. Thank each of you for stepping forward and helping me with this situation. I have spent the last few weeks pretty sick with a 3 day stay in hospital, so things just got away from me completely. Now trying to bring things b...	John	6	752	Jun 14, 2016 by KennyFenderjazz
	my status lately... (Preview) Dear Friends, I finally started to get some medical help with my daily anxiety attacks, plus bad diarrhea as a symptom of the anxiety attacks, severe depression, chronic fatigue, and my respiratory system being so bad. I was in the hospital for 3 days just a few weeks ago. It appears that most everythi...	John	10	689	Jun 13, 2016 by wp
	funerals & memories (Preview) Funerals stink! 52 sad, mentally ill, sad, drug addict sad, alcoholic sad. SUICIDE, sad. What more can I say? I can relate to the mental illness part. It is just so sad that people who really didn't know her thought she was the crazy lady in our town. I am not much different. If I had the addictions that she...	Hoot Nanny	1	496	Jun 13, 2016 by Iamhere
	Courage To Change 13/6 (Preview) Today's c2c refers to step 11, where we seek to improve conscious contact with our HP through prayer and meditation. The reading suggests that how we go about identifying our HP at work in our lives is up to us entirely but it is important that one way or another, we do so if we wish to have the courage to cha...	missmeliss	2	497	Jun 13, 2016 by Hoot Nanny
	Should-ing (Preview) I learned in this program that when I put the word 'should' in front of anything Im about to say then Im being judgemental. Who am I to decide what another human being in this world (minus children) should be doing or not doing. If we are following this spiritual program then how do we know what is right or w...	el-cee	4	580	Jun 13, 2016 by Iamhere
	I am weary (Preview) Hello all, I've not posted in quite awhile but am reaching out to you all for support. I am married 25 years to my AH. We go round and round the alcohol merry-go-round. The lies, being impaired when I expect him to care for the children, driving under the influence, avoidance, smoothing over...polite r...	newleaf66	8	570	Jun 13, 2016 by newleaf66
	What to do? (Preview) My AH is really wearing me down. He tells me he has had a good life and is ready to die, so will not quit drinking. He is mentally abusive to me. He snaps at me all the time. He has urine and bowel incontinence, back problems, heart problems, emphysema (keeps smoking). I can't help it, but sometimes I j...	blindsided	9	660	Jun 12, 2016 by Iamhere
	Can I still lose my composure and get out of hand?? (Preview) You all get an A for the proper answer....I get tired of loosing control because of a basketball game thousands of miles away, completely out of my control is being played and referred not to my liking...good I got u p from the sofa and left the room because I still don't do judgement and active resentm...	Jerry F	7	617	Jun 12, 2016 by Jerry F
	How do you pick up the strands of an unwoven life? (Preview) Before you read this I want you to know that I write this today for my healing and my coping with having lived with an addict. This is not here to tell you how to feel, or how to make a decision in your life, and it is by no means direction on how to deal with living with an addict. This is just my story, that I fe...	Dinger045	6	697	Jun 12, 2016 by likemyheart
	Ornery Mood .. (Preview) Ohhh I'm in such an ornery mood. I'm sitting in Starbucks at the big table and this young woman sat down at the big table I'm at which honestly don't care about that however RUDE MUCH!? She has slammed things trying to get my attention and let me know she's irritated that I have the nerve to use two of the p...	SerenityRUS	0	1904	Jun 12, 2016 by SerenityRUS
	C2C reading for 6-12 (Preview) The C2C reading for June 12 speaks about the 10th step and suggest making it part of our daily routine as It is a gentle, warm and loving way to take care of ourselves. The steps help us to learn that living one day at a time, facing all issues honestly and with courage we will grow in spirituality and co...	hotrod	1	399	Jun 12, 2016 by Iamhere
	recovering doormat (Preview) i am a member of recovering doormats and proud of it. It took me a long time in alanon to get there though. I was very glad i could stand up for me by the time my xah left. i was ready for the fallout and Emotionally stronger to cope. i still struggle with my emotional sobriety that is a work in process. I still...	Mirandac	18	856	Jun 12, 2016 by Mirandac
	Step 11 (Preview) http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t62267347/alanon-step-11-6-12-2016/	hotrod	0	442	Jun 11, 2016 by hotrod
	Dealing with friend "support" while A is sober Sober support friends (Preview) Hi everyone- My spouse has been sober now 28 days. Part of that was in the hospital, but she's been really committed to not drink and trying to make herself healthy, talking to a counselor and working on healing. She is still very sick physically and looks it still. It's a hard road. Anyway, she's come c...	gabigail	6	4096	Jun 11, 2016 by Iamhere
	will be West Coasting in June - July (Preview) Going to be lounging in Central Valley CA. for 3 weeks soon so I will be off of the board unless I bum my wife's IPad or something. Understand I am not a Continental U.S. person and even while I have family relatives living there I just am not into it. I will not complain. I am an island boy surrounded by...	Jerry F	14	709	Jun 11, 2016 by Jerry F
	Help :( (Preview) I think my boyfriend may be alcoholic. He has a high stress c-suite job. He drinks 750ml of either tequila or bourbon in 2 nights. But he never gets violent or even angry. He gets up and goes to work every morning. So I question that I even question him. He slurs and stumbles. It worries me because I fear f...	poptart	8	787	Jun 11, 2016 by Jerry F
	House is up for Sale (Preview) I did it....the house is up for sale. First step to a new life Thank you all!!	Cathyinaz	19	872	Jun 11, 2016 by LinSC
	Courage to Change Reading 6-11-2016 (Preview) The C2C reading for June 11 talks about Step Nine. In this step we are asked to make direct amends to people we have injured. The reading points out the logical progression of the Steps, as it is in Step 8 where we learn what making "amends" means and become willing .to do so. Since these amends ar...	hotrod	2	487	Jun 11, 2016 by Hoot Nanny
	Ball to the Head......Prayers Welcome (Preview) Good morning MIP family.....I type this morning with only one eye - my right eye is swollen shut. Yesterday, I went out to play softball - it is a program league and usually very fun and even spiritual. I was pitching and a guy hit a line shot back at me - I did not get the glove up and it tagged me hard on the fo...	Iamhere	25	799	Jun 11, 2016 by Cathyinaz
	No affection/sex (Preview) I'm feeling lost and not sure if I'm the problem or if this is normal....my husband is a recovering alcoholic he did a 28 day inpatient and is now attending an outpatient program. He rarely shows me any affection since he's been home from rehab he came home the first week of May and we had sex twice the firs...	MrsW	16	1134	Jun 11, 2016 by Jerry F
	growth (Preview) months ago, I really didn't know what colour of the sky was, I was so we wrapped up in insanity. Its amazing what even small changes can bring about and I'm grateful though still have a way to go. I was perpetually guilty feeling, always trying to accommodate crazy and not really even knowing why. The sma...	a4l	4	519	Jun 11, 2016 by SerenityRUS
	Courage to Change (C2C) 6/10/2016 (Preview) Today's reading in Courage to Change is about Step 8 - Made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all. Many of us look at this and pause, longer than necessary and many more are not ready/willing to consider making amends to some we have hurt. The reading suggests if...	Iamhere	4	512	Jun 10, 2016 by hotrod
	perspective (Preview) Perspective taking is key to many things in my life. For me it helps to understand where people are coming from, where they have been and perhaps the motives behind their current choices. Having dated an alcoholic, who now is in recovery; I find this to be even more helpful as I try to navigate the rel...	Crau	4	853	Jun 10, 2016 by hotrod
	Struggling and angry (Preview) I am really struggling with anger and sadness tonight. I have been working hard to work my program and put the focus on me tonight, but not doing a very good job of it. My AH was in recovery when we met and married so I never knew him as a drinker. In fact, he told me he didn't drink...he was in recovery from d...	SandyG	5	607	Jun 10, 2016 by Mirandac
	Detaching (Preview) My adult daughter is in recovery although I really have no idea if she has had any relapses. She suffers from depression and anxiety and has difficulty coping with even the smallest amount of stress. Even with medication she has struggled. I have really had to use detachment with love because for year...	El	6	517	Jun 10, 2016 by El
	Introduction of myself to this online Al-Anon Family Group MIRACLES IN PROGRESS (Preview) Hello! I am Connie Sue. I first walked into the rooms of Al-Anon on April 3, 1995. I cried my first two years and was not sure of what I was getting myself into as it seemed that most everyone was happy! After deciding to get a sponsor, I took a leap of faith with beginning to learn and use the 12-Steps, I...	Connie Sue	7	611	Jun 10, 2016 by Hoot Nanny
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.