Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Satori · Satori

Hello Everyone - I am survivor of child sexual abuse by my father. On Dec. 10, 1994, similar to a day an addict would choose not to use again, I chose a day to no longer be a victim but a survivor. Having been educated in many avenues of recovery up to that point, I embraced the 12-step progra...

nycbt · nycbt

I am angry with what happen last night. I work very hard on my tempter. I did well I didn't call him that much which was a good thing. I didn't go running after him which was another good thing. I didn't cry when he left. But I did snap and I end up hitting him lightly. But I yelled I lost it. I am mad that I am going...

Ratchie · Ratchie

The following is a quote from the book "The Four Agreements" by Miguel Ruiz "The limit of your self-abuse is exactly the limit that you will tolerate from someone else. If someone abuses you a little more than you abuse yourself, you will probably walk away from that person. But if some...

Christy · Christy

I am responsible for... from "Codependent No More" by Melody Beattie I am responsible for myself. I am responsible for leading or not living my life. I am responsible for tending to my spiritual, emotional, physical, and financial well-being. I am responsible for identifying...

sanddie · sanddie

I can't sleep-- too much going on. My ex had me in court today to continue to keep the relationship going in anyway possible since our divorce 9 years ago. We have kids, so he uses the kids to get to me... Ok, so I got through that concept, so now he uses any means to bring me into court to financially sabotage...

nycbt · nycbt

Last night was not a good night.Well at the job he was working out he ws very arguementive. Then it started when he wanted to take my car while was at my meeting. In the begin I didn't want him too but I thought how much trouble can he get into a hour. I told him I wanted him to be back in an hour. When I came out he w...

hudsond · hudsond

Thank you so much for all of your prayers yesterday. It was a good day. I kept the computer on this website all day. I tried not to worry and did pretty good. When I did begin to worry I would say a prayer and try to let it go. When I got home--he was home and sober. I was so ha...

nikkilou · nikkilou

Hi all, I'm feeling down so i came here to vent a little. I just did my check book and I'm short minus -$28.00. I know it not much but something going to bounce. I've been looking around the house for short change and found some only $10 left to find. ...

pixel04 · pixel04

I've been having some trouble in my marriage lately. I have talked about it with my sponsor, and at her suggestion I've sought outside help to help me figure out how to handle it. I've never done anything like this before, and I'm not confortable with it. I've searched around and seen a few people and s...

hudsond · hudsond

I am not looking forward to today. I am extrememly worried about my a. We got a letter in the mail yesterday about his latest law stuff. They want to make a deal, but it isn't a good deal. He was upset, but acted alright to begin with. By 1:00 this morning he was all down and...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

j this daily, i really needed.....last night was *nighmare on elm street* for me...with my A and NA brother, flipping out........ Detaching with Love Sometimes people we love do things we don't like or approve of. We react. They react. Before long, we're all reacting to eac...

sg · sg

blech...what a night. A. was suppose to go to work out of town and our daughter had wanted to plan a bday party for 14 of her friends while he was gone. Bon fire, scarey movies, pizza and sleep over. Plan was since the A. is rather impatient, tempermental and so unhappy damn near all of the time that we w...

bcraindrop70 · bcraindrop70

Hi all I am new here. I have been married to my A for 7 years (together for 12). We have had a very roller coaster relationship as most of us have. In 2002 we seperated for a period of 10 mos. He went in to a rehab program, and I went back to him. He was still an active A but t...

bd · bd

Hey Gals & Guy's Going to see my parents this weekend as I posted before. For some reason I feel this calm. Even though I'm disappointed because they never call and when I get there my dad will be sitting drunk in his van. I just really miss them. Even if they are both disf...

jj · jj

If we willingly surrender ourselves to the spiritual discipline of the Twelve Steps, our lives will be transformed. We will become mature, responsible individuals with a great capacity for joy, fulfillment, and wonder. Though we may never be perfect, continued spiritual progress...

nycbt · nycbt

My dad signed himself into a rehab this weekend. It is the 4th attempt at this. I spent some time with my mom because I didn't want her to get lonely. My mom is a strong person. She is going to have to go to a program which maybe she will then end up going into alanon as well. I can only hope. But I am happy f...

Cathy · Cathy

What a beautiful mastiff you have. Here are my two. Hopefully it'll work. :)

twinmom2 · twinmom2

Hello Group, I have not posted in quite a while. I guess I have strayed from working program, but have still been focusing on changes to myself. I have recently been working on refinancing my home to lower my monthly cost of living expenses. I believe I had posted previously that...

marmare · marmare

It's been three days since my A returned home. I thought when he came home he would come back with a chip on his shoulder, he didn't. He returned home very humble. He shared how he missed me, even though he said he didn't, he said he was hurt and wanted to hurt me back. (this is the...

Cathy · Cathy

Hello, I hope I'm in the right place. My b/f is an alcoholic and I'm trying to deal with it. I'd love to talk with others who are going through the same thing. Thank You. Cathy

warramra · warramra

Hi. I have been reading through and trying to decide if I should post or not. Normally not very good on these boards. I am a sober A in recovery (11 yrs) married to an A who is in the middle of a relapse after 12 yrs. He started drinking sometime this summer with me clueing in sometime in early Sept. I have...

hadit · hadit

Hi everyone, Thank you all for your input in my last two posts. As always they were very helpful and insightful. More importantly, they made me think about decisions I have to make in my own life to benefit me. Wow, I just realized what I said in that last statement...I put me first! I thin...

nycbt · nycbt

If you are willing to sponsor someone please put you name down. Maybe we can hook people up so they will have good matches and helps everyone. There is alot of people including me that are looking for online sponsors. -- Edited by nycbt at 13:49, 2005-10-18

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

Hope for Today - October 20 In my first Al-Anon meeting, I listened intently to other people share. One woman spoke of feeling as if she were in a dark and lonely place, like the bottom of a well. The tools of the program helped her see the light at the top of the well, but it was still going to be a t...

mastiff · mastiff

hi all, had a bit of a hard night last night with my a. I got a bit jelous and fearful when he decided he was going to take a day off work right before we go on vaction in Nov. The reason he wanted to take a day off is to do a favor for a sponsee of his.... the reason i got jelous and fearful is bec...

WakingUp · WakingUp

Went to Al-Anon last night feeling pretty good. No new crises in our home this week etc. After listening for awhile, though, I didn't feel as happy. There was one reading in particular that they real regularly at this meeting from one of the pieces of literature (I think it was in my...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

Not Just Another Customer Service Call Customer: Okay, I'm done. LOVE has started installing itself automatically. Is that normal? Service Rep: Yes it is. You should receive a message that says it will reinstall for the life of your HEART. Do you see that message? Customer: Yes I do. Is it completely...

debilyn · debilyn

She has been by his side thru it all. Until she saw the man she loved turn into a 70 pound man. He died this morning. please say a prayer for our sheila in England and her A. send her love, love yous,debilyn

kerry5 · kerry5

There is a alateen speaker coming to speak for the teens on Sunday at 8pm est in the Family TEEn chatroom. You are all welcome to come and give him your support and listen to a teen thats been in recovery for a long time.. I can't wait... I hope you will come give your support Thanks ke...

jj · jj

Tonight I lost my temper with my A husband. I was fumming mad when he got home but rather than saying any thing or yelling like I would have before alanon I just left. I did hang up on him earlier and when I did actually loose my temper let him know that his deception did anger me... It cou...

kitty · kitty

I'm disappointed. My step-father says he's going to meetings but who knows?!! The junk he comes out with is so awful! He says he doesn't think he even has a problem & resents my mother for telling him if he wants to live with her, he has to go to mtgs & abstain from alcohol. ...

sg · sg

I posted my update on the original thread, but I think it got lost! Just wanted to share w/those that were following my weekend plans. Here it is.... Well we went out last night..went to dinner. Nice lil' place that serves good cajun food in town. I was excited to spend some "alone" time w/my A.,...

captcodee · captcodee

You guys are so great! Thanks to all of you who just let me be me! I am so thankful that you all supported the part of me who actually NEEDED to sit on the pity pot. The stupid voice inside my head that tells me that I am not allowed to take an emotional break did not like to hear all the suppo...

chrissy · chrissy

hi guys: i don't know what to feel anymore i guess i feel numb

. i miss my husband very much we spent a couple of hours on sunday together it was so nice. my husband told me he misses me so much. he loves to spend time with me but it hurts to leave

. we talk on the phone a couple a times a day but...

Magpie · Magpie

Hi everyone, These last three days have been particularly tough. My A has been drinking a lot and has been particularly nasty. In the past it has always been directed at me, although often in the presence of my kids or directly involving my kids ("don't listen to mom, she's mean"...

nmike · nmike

I sympathize with you all that are trying to leave your A or get them to leave you alone. My A who moved out in June has done the opposite. A counselor called it an amputation. He doesn't want very much interaction with me at all. He says that we will always have some sort of relationship because of our three...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

One of the conclusions I have come to in my old age is the importance of living in the ever-present now. In the past, too often I indulged in the belief that somehow or other tomorrow would be brighter or happier or richer. --Ruth Casey How easily our minds jump from the present to the foibles of the pa...

bd · bd

Hey Friends I have been living with someone for about a year. We have been together for about a year and a half. Things haven't been that great for the last month. He is not an A but he is emotionally retarded as far as I'm concerned. Well anyway....we have spoke little over t...

UncleLou · UncleLou

I'm hoping my ex wife has finally hit bottom. For the past month she has been depressed to the point of almost not functioning, especially on Sunday nights and Monday mornings. God put another couple in our lives, our daughter's friend's parents. Although alcoholism wasn't involved with them, they...

bd · bd

Hi I've been trying over week, but there is no way for me to get to a meeting. I have no to watch my daughter at night and work during the day. I can't go on my lunch because there's just not enough time. Feeling a little discouraged about all. It feels like there is some force ag...

SashaBear · SashaBear

I haven't posted here before but have hung out in the chat room from time to time. I really blew it with my AH this last week. He had gotten into more trouble at the end of August and spent 10 days in jail. I had planned on not letting him come back home this time. We talked, I put forth some conditions, he a...

Kim · Kim

Hello Roomies: I got my copy of the Dilemma of the Alcoholic Marriage today. I was so excited that I read it through dinner and didn't even turn on the TV. I definitely related to alot of it. I have a few questions to throw out to you though. 1) as my husband has had the tendency to frequent establishmen...

captcodee · captcodee

Here is an update on true progress. My hubby still is not sober, but MY changed attitude was shown clearly today. We had to punish our children for quite a severe lie today, and we actually sat at the table and talked it out, finding the best solution we could think of. He is not in a program. M...

kerry5 · kerry5

I read these when my mom died somehow they came by email at the right time. The letter from heaven one was read at my moms service, the priest read it for her it was the poem read at the pope's service , thought it might be a little comforting to you, was to me I know that even a little relief his suffering has en...

Diane43 · Diane43

Hello everyone, I am new here and have been affected by alcoholism. It is a very sad thing, yet I know I am powerless over his disease. I met this man a year ago, and I grew to care about him. He drank a few times when I was with him, but never did I expect him to be an alcoholic. As t...

sandie123 · sandie123

I had a tough day yesterday. Someone told me something I did not want to hear. I felt like they were belittling my actions. This sent me into a negative downwards spiral. I began self doubting myself once more. It really hurt my mind-set and my progress. I had been told 3 times that morning that I was w...

bd · bd

Hi Friends Just wanted to let you all know that as each day goes by and the more and more posts I read, I can feel myself getting stronger. For the first time in my life I don't feel alone and still can;t get over the honesty and openess of this group. Everyone's post hits close to home and has...

Lani · Lani

Friends, "It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. ...I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing." -- Oriah Mountain Dreamer In love and spirit, Lani Children of Alcoholics: http://lanipicard.com/coa.htm

gardengal · gardengal

"Keep coming back" is a phrase we often hear in alanon. Why is it so important? Because many of us have grown so hardened in our fights with alcoholics or flights from alcoholics that we literally found it difficult to sit still for the process of recovery. We had to have answers right away or take action...

pixel04 · pixel04

I have learned in this program how to open my mouth and express myself and to ask for help. I didn't do those kinds of things when I was growing up. Last week at a meeting I mentioned a problem I was having and what my approach to it was. After the meeting, others shared with me what had worked for them. It ne...

Jeannie · Jeannie

I'm having a bad day, my mind id going in a million directions. I have so many questions that I am tired of rationalizing. How is my husband in denial. He knows what his drinking has done, he knows it is destroying his health. He knows it has cost him several jobs, he knows it is costing him his family, a...

nycbt · nycbt

Yesterday was a good day. I went to the park and walked around the track. And then I went to my sisters house and spent time with her and her family. It was a very good day. My active alcholic father has sign into a rehab.

nikkilou · nikkilou

I just found this and love it. I think all of us here will like it to. Please look at this webpage http://www.inspiringthots.net/movie/to-letgo.php enjoy my friends NIKKILOU

-- Edited by nikkilou at 12:15, 2005-10-17

hadit · hadit

Good Morning Everyone Well, after I wrote my post here last night, I decided to give it one more try. I gave him another call. As usual, I got the voicemail and left a message telling him that obviously he really didn't want me to keep in touch, so I won't bother him anymore, I love you..Goodnight. About...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

Throwing Out the Rule Book Many of us feel like we need a rulebook, a microscope, and a warranty to get through life. We feel uncertain, frightened. We want the security of knowing what's going to happen, and how we shall act.We don't trust life or ourselves.We don't trust the Plan.We want to be in c...

marmare · marmare

You guys are the best! I was almost afraid to post, my friends and family have been supportive with me, and you all have been there. I was afraid of the negative, but you all have come through once again giving me examples of living with an active A. My expectations are realistic.&nb...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

When people bother you in any way, it is because their souls are trying to get your divine attention and your blessing. --Catherine Ponder We are in constant communication with one another and with God in the spiritual realm. No matter how singular our particular course may appear, our path is...

hudsond · hudsond

Last week was a good week. After his last high (Friday a week ago), I tried to stay very calm. I cried, he cried. But I told him how I felt and what I wanted from our relationship. I told him I am not calling it quits, but there will come a time if things continue the way they are that I will have to l...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

Hope for Today - October 18 The guidance embodied in the Serenity Prayer was a foreign concept when I walked into my first Al-Anon meeting. I soon realized it must be important because every meeting I attended since has used it as part of the opening. Applying it to my recovery seem...

tullemars · tullemars

I am good Today. Thank You all for your kind words. This has been the toughest road I have ever traveled. But, I am at the top of the mountain. I am going to enjoy the ride down. I know now why it is so tough to let the A go with love. That is the only way you can truly help your A. If you love you...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	11 years recovery and now on the other end (Preview) Hello Everyone - I am survivor of child sexual abuse by my father. On Dec. 10, 1994, similar to a day an addict would choose not to use again, I chose a day to no longer be a victim but a survivor. Having been educated in many avenues of recovery up to that point, I embraced the 12-step progra...	Satori	11	742	Oct 21, 2005 by rosie light shines
	I am angry (Preview) I am angry with what happen last night. I work very hard on my tempter. I did well I didn't call him that much which was a good thing. I didn't go running after him which was another good thing. I didn't cry when he left. But I did snap and I end up hitting him lightly. But I yelled I lost it. I am mad that I am going...	nycbt	7	434	Oct 21, 2005 by rosie light shines
	Abuse / Self-Abuse (Preview) The following is a quote from the book "The Four Agreements" by Miguel Ruiz "The limit of your self-abuse is exactly the limit that you will tolerate from someone else. If someone abuses you a little more than you abuse yourself, you will probably walk away from that person. But if some...	Ratchie	7	735	Oct 21, 2005 by kitty
	I am responsible for... (Preview) I am responsible for... from "Codependent No More" by Melody Beattie I am responsible for myself. I am responsible for leading or not living my life. I am responsible for tending to my spiritual, emotional, physical, and financial well-being. I am responsible for identifying...	Christy	5	449	Oct 21, 2005 by nmike
	Just When We Think We Have It All Worked Out.... (Preview) I can't sleep-- too much going on. My ex had me in court today to continue to keep the relationship going in anyway possible since our divorce 9 years ago. We have kids, so he uses the kids to get to me... Ok, so I got through that concept, so now he uses any means to bring me into court to financially sabotage...	sanddie	9	581	Oct 21, 2005 by Satori
	Last night (Preview) Last night was not a good night.Well at the job he was working out he ws very arguementive. Then it started when he wanted to take my car while was at my meeting. In the begin I didn't want him too but I thought how much trouble can he get into a hour. I told him I wanted him to be back in an hour. When I came out he w...	nycbt	4	657	Oct 21, 2005 by nycbt
	Thanks/ wondering (Preview) Thank you so much for all of your prayers yesterday. It was a good day. I kept the computer on this website all day. I tried not to worry and did pretty good. When I did begin to worry I would say a prayer and try to let it go. When I got home--he was home and sober. I was so ha...	hudsond	3	556	Oct 21, 2005 by Jeannie
	having a bad morning (Preview) Hi all, I'm feeling down so i came here to vent a little. I just did my check book and I'm short minus -$28.00. I know it not much but something going to bounce. I've been looking around the house for short change and found some only $10 left to find. ...	nikkilou	3	337	Oct 21, 2005 by Emmie11
	just a little scared (Preview) I've been having some trouble in my marriage lately. I have talked about it with my sponsor, and at her suggestion I've sought outside help to help me figure out how to handle it. I've never done anything like this before, and I'm not confortable with it. I've searched around and seen a few people and s...	pixel04	7	500	Oct 21, 2005 by lin0606
	trying not to worry (Preview) I am not looking forward to today. I am extrememly worried about my a. We got a letter in the mail yesterday about his latest law stuff. They want to make a deal, but it isn't a good deal. He was upset, but acted alright to begin with. By 1:00 this morning he was all down and...	hudsond	3	436	Oct 21, 2005 by kitty
	BAAAD night last night with my A/NA brother (Preview) *j this daily, i really needed.....last night was nighmare on elm street* for me...with my A and NA brother, flipping out........ Detaching with Love** Sometimes people we love do things we don't like or approve of. We react. They react. Before long, we're all reacting to eac...	rosie light shines	4	506	Oct 20, 2005 by kitty
	We're just miserable (Preview) blech...what a night. A. was suppose to go to work out of town and our daughter had wanted to plan a bday party for 14 of her friends while he was gone. Bon fire, scarey movies, pizza and sleep over. Plan was since the A. is rather impatient, tempermental and so unhappy damn near all of the time that we w...	sg	10	624	Oct 20, 2005 by sg
	Where do I go from here? (Preview) Hi all I am new here. I have been married to my A for 7 years (together for 12). We have had a very roller coaster relationship as most of us have. In 2002 we seperated for a period of 10 mos. He went in to a rehab program, and I went back to him. He was still an active A but t...	bcraindrop70	4	512	Oct 20, 2005 by leo
	This Weekend (Preview) Hey Gals & Guy's Going to see my parents this weekend as I posted before. For some reason I feel this calm. Even though I'm disappointed because they never call and when I get there my dad will be sitting drunk in his van. I just really miss them. Even if they are both disf...	bd	2	350	Oct 20, 2005 by leo
	A share from survival to recovery (Preview) If we willingly surrender ourselves to the spiritual discipline of the Twelve Steps, our lives will be transformed. We will become mature, responsible individuals with a great capacity for joy, fulfillment, and wonder. Though we may never be perfect, continued spiritual progress...	jj	1	601	Oct 20, 2005 by Peggy7
	MY DAD (Preview) My dad signed himself into a rehab this weekend. It is the 4th attempt at this. I spent some time with my mom because I didn't want her to get lonely. My mom is a strong person. She is going to have to go to a program which maybe she will then end up going into alanon as well. I can only hope. But I am happy f...	nycbt	7	512	Oct 20, 2005 by Flora123
	This is for Mastiff (Preview) What a beautiful mastiff you have. Here are my two. Hopefully it'll work. :)	Cathy	7	465	Oct 20, 2005 by dogscribe
	Coming out of my hole (Preview) Hello Group, I have not posted in quite a while. I guess I have strayed from working program, but have still been focusing on changes to myself. I have recently been working on refinancing my home to lower my monthly cost of living expenses. I believe I had posted previously that...	twinmom2	5	525	Oct 20, 2005 by twinmom2
	No Crisis (Preview) It's been three days since my A returned home. I thought when he came home he would come back with a chip on his shoulder, he didn't. He returned home very humble. He shared how he missed me, even though he said he didn't, he said he was hurt and wanted to hurt me back. (this is the...	marmare	5	427	Oct 20, 2005 by nycbt
	I'm new here. (Preview) Hello, I hope I'm in the right place. My b/f is an alcoholic and I'm trying to deal with it. I'd love to talk with others who are going through the same thing. Thank You. Cathy	Cathy	21	557	Oct 20, 2005 by nycbt
	New Here (Preview) Hi. I have been reading through and trying to decide if I should post or not. Normally not very good on these boards. I am a sober A in recovery (11 yrs) married to an A who is in the middle of a relapse after 12 yrs. He started drinking sometime this summer with me clueing in sometime in early Sept. I have...	warramra	10	465	Oct 20, 2005 by nycbt
	My Decision List & Thank You's (Preview) Hi everyone, Thank you all for your input in my last two posts. As always they were very helpful and insightful. More importantly, they made me think about decisions I have to make in my own life to benefit me. Wow, I just realized what I said in that last statement...I put me first! I thin...	hadit	5	524	Oct 20, 2005 by kitty
	PEOPLE THAT ARE WILLING TO SPONSOR (Preview) If you are willing to sponsor someone please put you name down. Maybe we can hook people up so they will have good matches and helps everyone. There is alot of people including me that are looking for online sponsors. -- Edited by nycbt at 13:49, 2005-10-18	nycbt	3	389	Oct 20, 2005 by hudsond
	transferring the focus onto me (Preview) Hope for Today - October 20 In my first Al-Anon meeting, I listened intently to other people share. One woman spoke of feeling as if she were in a dark and lonely place, like the bottom of a well. The tools of the program helped her see the light at the top of the well, but it was still going to be a t...	rosie light shines	0	400	Oct 20, 2005 by rosie light shines
	Trying to work my program (Preview) hi all, had a bit of a hard night last night with my a. I got a bit jelous and fearful when he decided he was going to take a day off work right before we go on vaction in Nov. The reason he wanted to take a day off is to do a favor for a sponsee of his.... the reason i got jelous and fearful is bec...	mastiff	7	487	Oct 20, 2005 by WakingUp
	Not Doing As Well As I Thought (Preview) Went to Al-Anon last night feeling pretty good. No new crises in our home this week etc. After listening for awhile, though, I didn't feel as happy. There was one reading in particular that they real regularly at this meeting from one of the pieces of literature (I think it was in my...	WakingUp	5	548	Oct 20, 2005 by WakingUp
	not just an ordinary service call (Preview) Not Just Another Customer Service Call Customer: Okay, I'm done. LOVE has started installing itself automatically. Is that normal? Service Rep: Yes it is. You should receive a message that says it will reinstall for the life of your HEART. Do you see that message? Customer: Yes I do. Is it completely...	rosie light shines	3	370	Oct 20, 2005 by shimo
	An A dies, but not alone (Preview) She has been by his side thru it all. Until she saw the man she loved turn into a 70 pound man. He died this morning. please say a prayer for our sheila in England and her A. send her love, love yous,debilyn	debilyn	18	722	Oct 20, 2005 by jonibaloni21
	Family Teen Support (Preview) There is a alateen speaker coming to speak for the teens on Sunday at 8pm est in the Family TEEn chatroom. You are all welcome to come and give him your support and listen to a teen thats been in recovery for a long time.. I can't wait... I hope you will come give your support Thanks ke...	kerry5	2	367	Oct 19, 2005 by Maria123
	HP Stuff (Preview) Tonight I lost my temper with my A husband. I was fumming mad when he got home but rather than saying any thing or yelling like I would have before alanon I just left. I did hang up on him earlier and when I did actually loose my temper let him know that his deception did anger me... It cou...	jj	2	601	Oct 19, 2005 by TLC2
	our A is still @ Zero (Preview) I'm disappointed. My step-father says he's going to meetings but who knows?!! The junk he comes out with is so awful! He says he doesn't think he even has a problem & resents my mother for telling him if he wants to live with her, he has to go to mtgs & abstain from alcohol. ...	kitty	5	540	Oct 19, 2005 by cidboy
	update on Saturday night (Preview) I posted my update on the original thread, but I think it got lost! Just wanted to share w/those that were following my weekend plans. Here it is.... Well we went out last night..went to dinner. Nice lil' place that serves good cajun food in town. I was excited to spend some "alone" time w/my A.,...	sg	3	546	Oct 19, 2005 by cidboy
	POP Off falls the pity pot.... (Preview) You guys are so great! Thanks to all of you who just let me be me! I am so thankful that you all supported the part of me who actually NEEDED to sit on the pity pot. The stupid voice inside my head that tells me that I am not allowed to take an emotional break did not like to hear all the suppo...	captcodee	4	391	Oct 19, 2005 by Flora123
	i feel numb (Preview) hi guys: i don't know what to feel anymore i guess i feel numb. i miss my husband very much we spent a couple of hours on sunday together it was so nice. my husband told me he misses me so much. he loves to spend time with me but it hurts to leave. we talk on the phone a couple a times a day but...	chrissy	8	631	Oct 19, 2005 by SashaBear
	How did you set/enforce boundaries about abusive behavior (Preview) Hi everyone, These last three days have been particularly tough. My A has been drinking a lot and has been particularly nasty. In the past it has always been directed at me, although often in the presence of my kids or directly involving my kids ("don't listen to mom, she's mean"...	Magpie	7	586	Oct 19, 2005 by SashaBear
	Amputation (Preview) I sympathize with you all that are trying to leave your A or get them to leave you alone. My A who moved out in June has done the opposite. A counselor called it an amputation. He doesn't want very much interaction with me at all. He says that we will always have some sort of relationship because of our three...	nmike	3	483	Oct 19, 2005 by SashaBear
	staying in the NOW (Preview) One of the conclusions I have come to in my old age is the importance of living in the ever-present now. In the past, too often I indulged in the belief that somehow or other tomorrow would be brighter or happier or richer. --Ruth Casey How easily our minds jump from the present to the foibles of the pa...	rosie light shines	1	351	Oct 19, 2005 by pixel04
	Here I go again on my own (Preview) Hey Friends I have been living with someone for about a year. We have been together for about a year and a half. Things haven't been that great for the last month. He is not an A but he is emotionally retarded as far as I'm concerned. Well anyway....we have spoke little over t...	bd	5	535	Oct 19, 2005 by SashaBear
	Cautiously optimistic (will this lead to re-marriage?) (Preview) I'm hoping my ex wife has finally hit bottom. For the past month she has been depressed to the point of almost not functioning, especially on Sunday nights and Monday mornings. God put another couple in our lives, our daughter's friend's parents. Although alcoholism wasn't involved with them, they...	UncleLou	8	758	Oct 19, 2005 by browneyes
	Can't get to a meeting (Preview) Hi I've been trying over week, but there is no way for me to get to a meeting. I have no to watch my daughter at night and work during the day. I can't go on my lunch because there's just not enough time. Feeling a little discouraged about all. It feels like there is some force ag...	bd	6	347	Oct 19, 2005 by hudsond
	I blew it. Venting. (Preview) I haven't posted here before but have hung out in the chat room from time to time. I really blew it with my AH this last week. He had gotten into more trouble at the end of August and spent 10 days in jail. I had planned on not letting him come back home this time. We talked, I put forth some conditions, he a...	SashaBear	9	476	Oct 19, 2005 by SashaBear
	I read the dilemma of the alcoholic marriage: Questions (Preview) Hello Roomies: I got my copy of the Dilemma of the Alcoholic Marriage today. I was so excited that I read it through dinner and didn't even turn on the TV. I definitely related to alot of it. I have a few questions to throw out to you though. 1) as my husband has had the tendency to frequent establishmen...	Kim	3	4645	Oct 19, 2005 by captcodee
	Progress starts with ME (Preview) Here is an update on true progress. My hubby still is not sober, but MY changed attitude was shown clearly today. We had to punish our children for quite a severe lie today, and we actually sat at the table and talked it out, finding the best solution we could think of. He is not in a program. M...	captcodee	3	451	Oct 19, 2005 by gknee
	For Sheila (she123) (Preview) I read these when my mom died somehow they came by email at the right time. The letter from heaven one was read at my moms service, the priest read it for her it was the poem read at the pope's service , thought it might be a little comforting to you, was to me I know that even a little relief his suffering has en...	kerry5	1	518	Oct 19, 2005 by leo
	Looking for support (Preview) Hello everyone, I am new here and have been affected by alcoholism. It is a very sad thing, yet I know I am powerless over his disease. I met this man a year ago, and I grew to care about him. He drank a few times when I was with him, but never did I expect him to be an alcoholic. As t...	Diane43	3	437	Oct 18, 2005 by Jeannie
	Take what you want..... (Preview) I had a tough day yesterday. Someone told me something I did not want to hear. I felt like they were belittling my actions. This sent me into a negative downwards spiral. I began self doubting myself once more. It really hurt my mind-set and my progress. I had been told 3 times that morning that I was w...	sandie123	4	488	Oct 18, 2005 by tea2
	Holding my own (Preview) Hi Friends Just wanted to let you all know that as each day goes by and the more and more posts I read, I can feel myself getting stronger. For the first time in my life I don't feel alone and still can;t get over the honesty and openess of this group. Everyone's post hits close to home and has...	bd	3	374	Oct 18, 2005 by Karilynn
	A Good Quote (Preview) Friends, "It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. ...I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing." -- Oriah Mountain Dreamer In love and spirit, Lani Children of Alcoholics: http://lanipicard.com/coa.htm	Lani	0	332	Oct 18, 2005 by Lani
	KEEP COMING BACK,,,,,,, (Preview) "Keep coming back" is a phrase we often hear in alanon. Why is it so important? Because many of us have grown so hardened in our fights with alcoholics or flights from alcoholics that we literally found it difficult to sit still for the process of recovery. We had to have answers right away or take action...	gardengal	1	581	Oct 18, 2005 by captcodee
	Easy does it...but do it (Preview) I have learned in this program how to open my mouth and express myself and to ask for help. I didn't do those kinds of things when I was growing up. Last week at a meeting I mentioned a problem I was having and what my approach to it was. After the meeting, others shared with me what had worked for them. It ne...	pixel04	1	587	Oct 18, 2005 by captcodee
	Questions (Preview) I'm having a bad day, my mind id going in a million directions. I have so many questions that I am tired of rationalizing. How is my husband in denial. He knows what his drinking has done, he knows it is destroying his health. He knows it has cost him several jobs, he knows it is costing him his family, a...	Jeannie	6	440	Oct 18, 2005 by marmare
	GOOD DAY (Preview) Yesterday was a good day. I went to the park and walked around the track. And then I went to my sisters house and spent time with her and her family. It was a very good day. My active alcholic father has sign into a rehab.	nycbt	5	398	Oct 18, 2005 by marmare
	let go (Preview) I just found this and love it. I think all of us here will like it to. Please look at this webpage http://www.inspiringthots.net/movie/to-letgo.php enjoy my friends NIKKILOU -- Edited by nikkilou at 12:15, 2005-10-17	nikkilou	3	398	Oct 18, 2005 by chrissy
	Update: Advice & Strength (Preview) Good Morning Everyone Well, after I wrote my post here last night, I decided to give it one more try. I gave him another call. As usual, I got the voicemail and left a message telling him that obviously he really didn't want me to keep in touch, so I won't bother him anymore, I love you..Goodnight. About...	hadit	4	692	Oct 18, 2005 by marmare
	i "trashed" the rule book (Preview) Throwing Out the Rule Book Many of us feel like we need a rulebook, a microscope, and a warranty to get through life. We feel uncertain, frightened. We want the security of knowing what's going to happen, and how we shall act.We don't trust life or ourselves.We don't trust the Plan.We want to be in c...	rosie light shines	0	297	Oct 18, 2005 by rosie light shines
	The Best (Preview) You guys are the best! I was almost afraid to post, my friends and family have been supportive with me, and you all have been there. I was afraid of the negative, but you all have come through once again giving me examples of living with an active A. My expectations are realistic.&nb...	marmare	3	403	Oct 18, 2005 by browneyes
	no, i am NOT my brothers keeper (Preview) *When people bother you in any way, it is because their souls are trying to get your divine attention and your blessing. --Catherine Ponder* We are in constant communication with one another and with God in the spiritual realm. No matter how singular our particular course may appear, our path is...	rosie light shines	0	405	Oct 18, 2005 by rosie light shines
	Good Week (Preview) Last week was a good week. After his last high (Friday a week ago), I tried to stay very calm. I cried, he cried. But I told him how I felt and what I wanted from our relationship. I told him I am not calling it quits, but there will come a time if things continue the way they are that I will have to l...	hudsond	4	357	Oct 18, 2005 by hudsond
	serenity prayer....INDUSTRIAL strength (Preview) Hope for Today - October 18 The guidance embodied in the Serenity Prayer was a foreign concept when I walked into my first Al-Anon meeting. I soon realized it must be important because every meeting I attended since has used it as part of the opening. Applying it to my recovery seem...	rosie light shines	0	309	Oct 18, 2005 by rosie light shines
	I am OK part 2 (Preview) I am good Today. Thank You all for your kind words. This has been the toughest road I have ever traveled. But, I am at the top of the mountain. I am going to enjoy the ride down. I know now why it is so tough to let the A go with love. That is the only way you can truly help your A. If you love you...	tullemars	0	322	Oct 18, 2005 by tullemars
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.