Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

annieb · annieb

What do they say "You only get what you deserve". I'm beginning to wonder what I did in the past to deserve what is on my plate now. My life is so complex and such a long story its not worth boring anyone with except to say that my partner started binge drinking in 97 and has contin...

Mandi · Mandi

I don't know how my life ended up this way. This isn't how things are supposed to be. I try so hard to smile and tell the world how happy I am but I don't think I'm fooling anyone anymore. I went out dancing last night for the first time in years. I had such a blast. I loved bei...

marmare · marmare

I get daily affirmations in my email, I sometimes print them at work to share with the counselors or post them on my computer monitor but today I have to share this one for us dog lovers.... Okay, so you don't have a tail. I don't either, but that’s not the point. I was watchin...

megan · megan

Alcoholism ruined our marriage A startling revelation made to me by my alcoholic husband. I met him for dinner and he uttered these words. He said that alcoholism is a disease and he is Irish and that alcoholism has been in his family for generations, so he can't help it. He must be reading th...

haximon · haximon

What a first day! First order of business was to buy a transit pass; without which here you're screwed. next was a meeting Senora bob clued me in to...NW at noon...40 people...topic was gifts of the program :) There was a Vietnamese place nearby which had my favorite comfort food of all.....

Iris · Iris

My daughter is recovering and has been sober from alcohol for over 3 months. She is 21 and also taking a university class. Tonight she said she wanted to go to family counselling because she said my husband (step dad) is gossiping about her. She heard a couple of stories that she is c...

mizcathi · mizcathi

My husband and I have been married for almost 28 years and have two grown children. Our oldest son, 27, just recently called to tell us he was getting a divorce, and oh yes, could he come back home to live because he now realized how “important” family is and he wants to start over. We told him...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

The quote below : Infidelity is a need for power, not a lack of love or romance. I am confused. (?) Seeking infidelity when feeling powerless in a committed relationship? Men needing a sense of power? &...

beachbaby · beachbaby

I am so afraid right now-----I want to run! My A and I have spent some time apart this week, he needed to focus on self and so did I-now he wants to talk tonite-very afraid he wants to call it off-told him I need time before we talk but I think I am just avoiding him because I feel hes go...

kimmie · kimmie

Well I am proud of myself last night. My "A" had some friends over and he got drunk. Not just the normal drunk, but the agrumentative drunk. And I just humored him and said things like "yes, honey" and "ok honey" and I didnt bite. The things h...

princess433 · princess433

Hi- My mom is a alcoholic. I have been very hurt by her. If anyone needs to talk, I am here.

kitty · kitty

I am really struggling with having any hope for them. I cannot go there, for hoping for them, is a slip for me. I cannot think about them at all - I have done this for 20 years, I MUST think of myself. Having hope for myself is a foreign & a new concept. I am trying to g...

kitty · kitty

I spent the entire day w/ my mom & we made it to our first f2f (yaay for us!) As I was driving home just now, I realized I made some comments at last night's chat mtg & I want to humbly apologize to everyone. I have no right to say anything to anyone in here (or anywhere els...

princess433 · princess433

It is hard to have a parent how has a problem with alcohol.

kathy570 · kathy570

I was replying to Apple and realized that I had to share this with ALL. From the Alcoholics side.......... There was no way on earth that I was going to admit that I was an ALCOHOLIC. The word itself was horrific, demoralizing and just plan nasty.. I wasn't...

fiona123 · fiona123

HI Kerry SO SORRY i *poofed on you * had a lil kitty emergency that pulled me away from screen before i could write it down .... I am behind you .. good work Love in recovery Fiona

browneyes · browneyes

Last night at the meeting we were talking about boundries and I brought up the subject about setting boundries for our children because they are too young to set them for themselves. My children are 8 and 5, so I feel like they are still too young to stand up for themselves. so I n...

haximon · haximon

[[ room ]] I am in Portland, and in one piece. I'm okay so don't worry. I know I need to sell my car and work on shelter and transit issues. Tomorrow I pick up my mail and the real work begins. I have had a real adventure that i could write volumes on. I can't thank the room as a whole enough for th...

Apple Pie · Apple Pie

This has been a week-- or more. My 'A' is pic-pic-nit-pic constantly-- sometimes I feel like he sees me as more of a child than an adult. That's okay-- maybe you can laugh when you read the latter part of this post.... Last Friday we went out with several other friends. The 'A' of course was oblit...

wmed · wmed

Today I am finding myself angry...Yesturday I was angry as well....I have been haveing trouble sleeping and when I get up in the a.m. I find myself angry...not a good way to start your day.... I shared a couple of weeks ago that My brother has picked up again and has been drinking for awhile now...I was...

jrtjosey · jrtjosey

Talked to cdb tonight. Her Dad is better, he was having problems with pacemaker. With some med adjustments he is doing much better. CDB and her Mom even went out Loveseat shopping today. She will probably be gone through the weekend. josey

Apple Pie · Apple Pie

I had been reading alot of the prior posts about crying and getting it out-- and I guess for me, I'm crying for all the things I think I've lost (besides my mind)... I keep thinking about what it was like when we first met and how we laughed, and dreamed and life seemed limitless. I'm just crushed at the thou...

kathy570 · kathy570

I drank I drank for Happiness and became unhappy I drank for Joy and became miserable I drank for Sociability and became argurmentative I drank for Sophistication and became obnoxious I drank for Frienship and made enimies I drank for Sleep and awakened without rest ...

dove · dove

8/8/2005 AM: Today started out running – like all systems go. When there’s lots to do, I do better. p.m.: The afternoon session with the therapist left much to be desired. Andrew & I had been given “homework” assignments. This consisted of a relationship workshe...

beachbaby · beachbaby

Hi everyone. Today I am sad and feel lonely, I want to cry to get out the tears but they wont come. Several weeks ago, my A relasped and he is now backing away from me to focus on himself, he put himself back into recovery the day after his relaspe, attending 2 mtgs a day, dail...

tullemars · tullemars

I could blame other people. (Wrong) I know it is my emotion and how I react is why I get upset. (and upset is covering fear) I choose to be with people who's behavior is not acceptable to me. (I own this one) I have to choose not to be near those people. ( I need to own this one) I am slowly learni...

hurtinginindy · hurtinginindy

A movie recommendation...if you haven't seen "The Upside of Anger" and are up for a good movie, this is with Joan Allen and Kevin Costner. Powerful, funny, thoughtful, wise. Best movie I've seen in some time. Here are the last words by the youngest daughter in this movie: "Anger and...

hurtinginindy · hurtinginindy

I am reading "Traveling Mercies...Some Thoughts on Faith" by Ann Lamott. Last night I ran across this and thought I would share... "Stop living in the problem and move into the solution." Good advice I think...it may be my new mantra. BTW the author of this book went through a pretty wild...

marmare · marmare

I noticed sometimes when I reply to a post I think hard and long before submitting it. Funny how my own words sometimes help with healing. I know I have to work hard sometimes at my program, sometimes harder then others. It's nice to know that self talk is so important and after years...

catherine · catherine

i don't cry much anymore. Part of the symptoms, I get numb with or w/o drugs, booze, etc. I have been noticing lately, that I really don't cry a lot. Sometimes, wish I did.....lol Anyway, when I do cry--it can be because I'm happy or sad........when i'm happy & I cry, i can usually s...

holly123 · holly123

Wow, Thanks everyone for your responses that is why I come here to know I am not alone or crazy. Lildee a special message to you, I understand so much about building resentments towards my daughter, my son and I get along great, although he is...

holly123 · holly123

Hi everyone, I have gone through and so many of the posts and so many relate to how I am feeling or things going on in my life. My lastest crisis is my kids emotions. It is so hard not to carry resentments straight through to them, especially my daughter w...

debilyn · debilyn

did you get the envelope i sent you? how are you and the kids doing? Please post me private or whatever. love,debilyn

i am a new member · jspooh

I feel the need to talk to others and have thought of al-anon before. I'm very happy to have found this sight and hope it will help. My husband is a alcoholic and now knows he has a problem but trying to fix it by himself. He was badly hurt at work 3 months ago and is still under doctors care but his drinking has...

JulieLynn · JulieLynn

I left my husband Thursday night and I haven't heard a word from him. I am trying to be strong and demand respect but I have let self-doubt rear it's ugly head. I took a stand and said that I didn't have to live like this anymore, that I deserved more. Now I need to be strong. If I le...

melanieL · melanieL

SORRY FOLKS REALLY NEED TO VENT. MY EX-A STILL DRIVING ME MAD. HE HAD BEEN REALLY NICE LAST FEW DAYS, THINK BECAUSE HE HAD A FRIEND STAYING WITH HIM AND WANTED TO SHOW HIM AND HIS FRIENDS THAT WE WERE ALL A FAMILY AND FULLY SUPPORTING HIM. HE IS GOING TO AMSTERDAM FOR THIS WEEKEND TO SPEAK ON...

JennyLynn · JennyLynn

Hi Everyone! My name is Jenny. I just found this site, and not a minute too soon. I'm having a really rough time lately. It's hard for me to go to meetings in my area because a lot of my qualifier's (my husband's) friends go to the Alanon meetings around here, and I don't feel c...

kitty · kitty

I've been in chat a lot lately & I try to read something on the boards everyday, I don't get to them all. But I have to say, the strength & wisdom I have gained in this painful month has been profound. Now, I want to give the same phrases back... Grief is a part of letting go. Al...

Peggy7 · Peggy7

Everyone needs this list to live by!!! habit.................................................... Joy.................................................................... The greatest loss..............

wallsal55 · wallsal55

Anyone in the midwest, this is near Chicago in Bloomingdale, IL. 2005 IL State Alanon Convention, Oct 7th -9th, 2005 with AA participation. Contact: kayakillinois@yahoo.com or go to: www.niafg.org and click on Events. Costs: Alanon $...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

Somedays are pretty neat, but then some days are just pretty empty. Some of my days have purpose enough for me. Some days I wander. I know I am waiting patiently for my HP to fill the void. Patience. Patience. :y...

nmike · nmike

Hi all, I am getting my youngest son ready to leave for college. He keeps playing a Moby produced song over and over again called In My World that starts out "Lordie, don't leave me all by myself". How fitting for me. My A husband has been gone all summer golfing, finding himself, and "getting away from...

Dolphin123 · Dolphin123

Ok I have a question, I am asking this for some tools, and I really need some help. For those of you who have/ had children: What do you tell them when their parent (the "A") doesn't come home because the "A" is out drinking/using? And what do you tell them when the "A" finally does come home and is d...

Stephanie · Stephanie

My A is behind me snoring after being out until three in the morning. I she just finished days of very hard work and her birthday is this week...funny but I came up with a saying last night when I was laying in bed waiting for her..."reason # 365." Meaning A's will find 365 good r...

jj · jj

Hi I know that it has been quite a while since I have posted and I just want to check in. I have been keeping bussy this summer doing things with the kids. I am doing good and have really noticed the progress of my program and keeping bussy helps alot to keep the focus on me. This summer ha...

debilyn · debilyn

After about dieing going and getting feed in this hot, sticky, icky, horrible, bright, sunshine... and getting groceries. OH no could not go early when it is cool. Have to put it off. After all this, I drive home, get out and see FeeFee is in distress. She is my tame white turkey, I am chasin...

hurtinginindy · hurtinginindy

Just coming off a short period of sobriety with my A...he's back to drinking. soooooooo tired... ...can't stand to hear one more time..."I'll get better"...empty words Opened the credit card bill today...he spent over $1000 on booze and cigarettes last month I went for a job interview tod...

Tammy · Tammy

I am writing this to seek opinions/advise or just validations of my emotions. My husband is an "A" . He grew up in an enviroment where both parents were alcoholics. His grandparents were alcoholics and family drank at every occasion. We have been married for almost 19 years and I can ho...

hvnly1 · hvnly1

You need it. I need it.They need it. Whoever THEY are. Love brings us to it like a moth to a flame. So, I've been hurt. You've been hurt. They've been hurt. Do not be mean. Don't treat someone in a way you wouldn't want to be treated. Come on now really, would...

haximon · haximon

[[ room ]] Ogden, Utah (1030 mountain, 1230 eastern) It seems I needed the room-night worse than I thought. I found a room near the meeting place to make life easier. The meeting itself was quite large, around 30 people and the topic was courage (apropos, dontcha think?). Good to see so many in...

kitty · kitty

My mother & step-father made it to their second session with this "family therapist". I am so disturbed about the behaviour of this woman doctor, I am actually horrified. She is jumping to judgement, feeding the A answers, telling my mother she is unreasonable, because she is setting bou...

megan · megan

Moving forward was one of the topics of last nights online meeting. I am working very hard on moving forward. This is after 3 1/2 years of stagnation and hoping things would change. Waiting around for things to change. Wishing that my life was different. But last July I found ala...

Sallen · Sallen

I have to share with you all the messed up perspective that my A exhibited last night and you will all understand and maybe get a chuckle. He wanted to use the phone. So in that ever so polite way, I'm sure some of you will understand the abusive nature of the demon, says, Bleepity, ble...

kismetstrand · kismetstrand

Comes A Dawn After awhile you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul. And you learn that love doesn't mean leaning, And company doesn't mean security, And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts, And presents aren't promises, And you begin to accept your defea...

swolves · swolves

Has someone ever said something to you that took a long time for you to fully understand? This recently happened to me, it was an epiphany.As many of you know my 1st husband died 4 1/2 years ago of an alcohol induced condition. He died sober and happy. At some point he had said to me "I'm &nb...

kismetstrand · kismetstrand

“Resentment will do nothing except tear us apart inside. No one ever found serenity through hatred. No one ever truly recovered from the effects of alcoholism by harboring anger or fear or by holding onto grudges….Forgiveness is no favor. We do it for no one but ourselves….Alth...

kismetstrand · kismetstrand

From Courage to Change, Feb. 2, pg. 33. "Today, being humble means climbing down from the ladder of judgement of myself and others, and taking my rightful place in a worldwide circle of love and support." May 21, pg 142. "Humility is said to be perpetual quietness of the heart. It means that I do m...

kismetstrand · kismetstrand

Dear Al-Anon/Alateen Members, At our World Service Office we have experienced an increase in expenses as we have increased our services to the fellowship: Half-price Forum subscriptions offer for groups Increased US and Canadian Public Outreach Activities Free public out...

kimmie · kimmie

I found meetings in my area finally but the page I printed out has "beginner meetings and regular meetings" do I go to a beginner meeting. I am new to this and I am not sure of the protocal. If anyone knows what I have to do or bring please let me know. Thank you

tullemars · tullemars

1. It is not my fault. 2. I can't cure it. 3. I can leave it. 4. Our kids are most important. 5. I deserve alot. 6. I deserve to be loved and to love. 7. I know the county sheriff's phone number. ...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Despair (Preview) What do they say "You only get what you deserve". I'm beginning to wonder what I did in the past to deserve what is on my plate now. My life is so complex and such a long story its not worth boring anyone with except to say that my partner started binge drinking in 97 and has contin...	annieb	14	737	Aug 13, 2005 by mom to 2
	This isn't how things are supposed to be (Preview) I don't know how my life ended up this way. This isn't how things are supposed to be. I try so hard to smile and tell the world how happy I am but I don't think I'm fooling anyone anymore. I went out dancing last night for the first time in years. I had such a blast. I loved bei...	Mandi	4	778	Aug 13, 2005 by mom to 2
	I have to share (Preview) I get daily affirmations in my email, I sometimes print them at work to share with the counselors or post them on my computer monitor but today I have to share this one for us dog lovers.... Okay, so you don't have a tail. I don't either, but that’s not the point. I was watchin...	marmare	1	662	Aug 13, 2005 by afmom03
	Alcoholism ruined our marriage (Preview) Alcoholism ruined our marriage A startling revelation made to me by my alcoholic husband. I met him for dinner and he uttered these words. He said that alcoholism is a disease and he is Irish and that alcoholism has been in his family for generations, so he can't help it. He must be reading th...	megan	4	741	Aug 13, 2005 by isabela40
	Haxigonian V (Preview) What a first day! First order of business was to buy a transit pass; without which here you're screwed. next was a meeting Senora bob clued me in to...NW at noon...40 people...topic was gifts of the program :) There was a Vietnamese place nearby which had my favorite comfort food of all.....	haximon	6	681	Aug 13, 2005 by whitie
	Recovering Daughter Problems (Preview) My daughter is recovering and has been sober from alcohol for over 3 months. She is 21 and also taking a university class. Tonight she said she wanted to go to family counselling because she said my husband (step dad) is gossiping about her. She heard a couple of stories that she is c...	Iris	3	717	Aug 12, 2005 by Iris
	Our son's little alcoholic houseguest (Preview) My husband and I have been married for almost 28 years and have two grown children. Our oldest son, 27, just recently called to tell us he was getting a divorce, and oh yes, could he come back home to live because he now realized how “important” family is and he wants to start over. We told him...	mizcathi	7	1238	Aug 12, 2005 by kitty
	kitty... (Preview) The quote below : Infidelity is a need for power, not a lack of love or romance. I am confused. (?) Seeking infidelity when feeling powerless in a committed relationship? Men needing a sense of power? &...	wallsal55	1	590	Aug 12, 2005 by kitty
	Confused (Preview) I am so afraid right now-----I want to run! My A and I have spent some time apart this week, he needed to focus on self and so did I-now he wants to talk tonite-very afraid he wants to call it off-told him I need time before we talk but I think I am just avoiding him because I feel hes go...	beachbaby	3	673	Aug 12, 2005 by Tammy
	One night at a time... (Preview) Well I am proud of myself last night. My "A" had some friends over and he got drunk. Not just the normal drunk, but the agrumentative drunk. And I just humored him and said things like "yes, honey" and "ok honey" and I didnt bite. The things h...	kimmie	6	723	Aug 12, 2005 by Christy
	my mom is an alcoholic! (Preview) Hi- My mom is a alcoholic. I have been very hurt by her. If anyone needs to talk, I am here.	princess433	3	617	Aug 12, 2005 by megan
	hope for us (Preview) I am really struggling with having any hope for them. I cannot go there, for hoping for them, is a slip for me. I cannot think about them at all - I have done this for 20 years, I MUST think of myself. Having hope for myself is a foreign & a new concept. I am trying to g...	kitty	1	605	Aug 12, 2005 by megan
	forgive me room! (Preview) I spent the entire day w/ my mom & we made it to our first f2f (yaay for us!) As I was driving home just now, I realized I made some comments at last night's chat mtg & I want to humbly apologize to everyone. I have no right to say anything to anyone in here (or anywhere els...	kitty	4	715	Aug 12, 2005 by marmare
	Children of alcoholics (Preview) It is hard to have a parent how has a problem with alcohol.	princess433	4	648	Aug 12, 2005 by lin0606
	Both sides of the Fence - Aug 11 (Preview) I was replying to Apple and realized that I had to share this with ALL. From the Alcoholics side.......... There was no way on earth that I was going to admit that I was an ALCOHOLIC. The word itself was horrific, demoralizing and just plan nasty.. I wasn't...	kathy570	5	650	Aug 12, 2005 by marmare
	For Kerry Sorry (Preview) HI Kerry SO SORRY i poofed on you had a lil kitty emergency that pulled me away from screen before i could write it down .... I am behind you .. good work Love in recovery Fiona	fiona123	1	586	Aug 12, 2005 by kerry5
	Help for the Children (Preview) Last night at the meeting we were talking about boundries and I brought up the subject about setting boundries for our children because they are too young to set them for themselves. My children are 8 and 5, so I feel like they are still too young to stand up for themselves. so I n...	browneyes	6	764	Aug 12, 2005 by isabela40
	haxi-gonian IV (Preview) [[ room ]] I am in Portland, and in one piece. I'm okay so don't worry. I know I need to sell my car and work on shelter and transit issues. Tomorrow I pick up my mail and the real work begins. I have had a real adventure that i could write volumes on. I can't thank the room as a whole enough for th...	haximon	12	700	Aug 11, 2005 by bubbles1990
	When is enuf, enuf? Please post! (Preview) This has been a week-- or more. My 'A' is pic-pic-nit-pic constantly-- sometimes I feel like he sees me as more of a child than an adult. That's okay-- maybe you can laugh when you read the latter part of this post.... Last Friday we went out with several other friends. The 'A' of course was oblit...	Apple Pie	8	812	Aug 11, 2005 by isabela40
	Angry (Preview) Today I am finding myself angry...Yesturday I was angry as well....I have been haveing trouble sleeping and when I get up in the a.m. I find myself angry...not a good way to start your day.... I shared a couple of weeks ago that My brother has picked up again and has been drinking for awhile now...I was...	wmed	3	673	Aug 11, 2005 by kismetstrand
	cdb and dad (Preview) Talked to cdb tonight. Her Dad is better, he was having problems with pacemaker. With some med adjustments he is doing much better. CDB and her Mom even went out Loveseat shopping today. She will probably be gone through the weekend. josey	jrtjosey	0	570	Aug 11, 2005 by jrtjosey
	Mourning? (Preview) I had been reading alot of the prior posts about crying and getting it out-- and I guess for me, I'm crying for all the things I think I've lost (besides my mind)... I keep thinking about what it was like when we first met and how we laughed, and dreamed and life seemed limitless. I'm just crushed at the thou...	Apple Pie	6	683	Aug 11, 2005 by mom to 2
	Part 2 -I DRANK FOR...from Both Sides of the Fence - Aug 11 (Preview) I drank I drank for Happiness and became unhappy I drank for Joy and became miserable I drank for Sociability and became argurmentative I drank for Sophistication and became obnoxious I drank for Frienship and made enimies I drank for Sleep and awakened without rest ...	kathy570	3	644	Aug 11, 2005 by Apple Pie
	The Rat Takes a Therapist (Preview) 8/8/2005 AM: Today started out running – like all systems go. When there’s lots to do, I do better. p.m.: The afternoon session with the therapist left much to be desired. Andrew & I had been given “homework” assignments. This consisted of a relationship workshe...	dove	4	828	Aug 11, 2005 by dove
	Sadness (Preview) Hi everyone. Today I am sad and feel lonely, I want to cry to get out the tears but they wont come. Several weeks ago, my A relasped and he is now backing away from me to focus on himself, he put himself back into recovery the day after his relaspe, attending 2 mtgs a day, dail...	beachbaby	3	603	Aug 11, 2005 by marmare
	Who made me upset? (Preview) I could blame other people. (Wrong) I know it is my emotion and how I react is why I get upset. (and upset is covering fear) I choose to be with people who's behavior is not acceptable to me. (I own this one) I have to choose not to be near those people. ( I need to own this one) I am slowly learni...	tullemars	4	633	Aug 11, 2005 by browneyes
	The Upside of Anger (Preview) A movie recommendation...if you haven't seen "The Upside of Anger" and are up for a good movie, this is with Joan Allen and Kevin Costner. Powerful, funny, thoughtful, wise. Best movie I've seen in some time. Here are the last words by the youngest daughter in this movie: "Anger and...	hurtinginindy	1	656	Aug 11, 2005 by Belongtome
	Problems & Solutions (Preview) I am reading "Traveling Mercies...Some Thoughts on Faith" by Ann Lamott. Last night I ran across this and thought I would share... "Stop living in the problem and move into the solution." Good advice I think...it may be my new mantra. BTW the author of this book went through a pretty wild...	hurtinginindy	0	580	Aug 11, 2005 by hurtinginindy
	My words come back (Preview) I noticed sometimes when I reply to a post I think hard and long before submitting it. Funny how my own words sometimes help with healing. I know I have to work hard sometimes at my program, sometimes harder then others. It's nice to know that self talk is so important and after years...	marmare	3	622	Aug 11, 2005 by hurtinginindy
	Question about crying..... (Preview) i don't cry much anymore. Part of the symptoms, I get numb with or w/o drugs, booze, etc. I have been noticing lately, that I really don't cry a lot. Sometimes, wish I did.....lol Anyway, when I do cry--it can be because I'm happy or sad........when i'm happy & I cry, i can usually s...	catherine	6	710	Aug 11, 2005 by QnJoan
	resentments and kids, cont. (Preview) Wow, Thanks everyone for your responses that is why I come here to know I am not alone or crazy. Lildee a special message to you, I understand so much about building resentments towards my daughter, my son and I get along great, although he is...	holly123	1	615	Aug 11, 2005 by Carol
	resentments and my kids (Preview) Hi everyone, I have gone through and so many of the posts and so many relate to how I am feeling or things going on in my life. My lastest crisis is my kids emotions. It is so hard not to carry resentments straight through to them, especially my daughter w...	holly123	10	830	Aug 11, 2005 by twinmom2
	Dori where are you???? (Preview) did you get the envelope i sent you? how are you and the kids doing? Please post me private or whatever. love,debilyn	debilyn	2	651	Aug 11, 2005 by Diva
	i am a new member (Preview) I feel the need to talk to others and have thought of al-anon before. I'm very happy to have found this sight and hope it will help. My husband is a alcoholic and now knows he has a problem but trying to fix it by himself. He was badly hurt at work 3 months ago and is still under doctors care but his drinking has...	jspooh	4	817	Aug 11, 2005 by holly123
	I am feeling down (Preview) I left my husband Thursday night and I haven't heard a word from him. I am trying to be strong and demand respect but I have let self-doubt rear it's ugly head. I took a stand and said that I didn't have to live like this anymore, that I deserved more. Now I need to be strong. If I le...	JulieLynn	6	728	Aug 11, 2005 by JulieLynn
	PEE'D OFF (Preview) SORRY FOLKS REALLY NEED TO VENT. MY EX-A STILL DRIVING ME MAD. HE HAD BEEN REALLY NICE LAST FEW DAYS, THINK BECAUSE HE HAD A FRIEND STAYING WITH HIM AND WANTED TO SHOW HIM AND HIS FRIENDS THAT WE WERE ALL A FAMILY AND FULLY SUPPORTING HIM. HE IS GOING TO AMSTERDAM FOR THIS WEEKEND TO SPEAK ON...	melanieL	1	615	Aug 11, 2005 by holly123
	Hi Everyone...new here. (Preview) Hi Everyone! My name is Jenny. I just found this site, and not a minute too soon. I'm having a really rough time lately. It's hard for me to go to meetings in my area because a lot of my qualifier's (my husband's) friends go to the Alanon meetings around here, and I don't feel c...	JennyLynn	4	859	Aug 11, 2005 by abbyal
	wisdom in here (Preview) I've been in chat a lot lately & I try to read something on the boards everyday, I don't get to them all. But I have to say, the strength & wisdom I have gained in this painful month has been profound. Now, I want to give the same phrases back... Grief is a part of letting go. Al...	kitty	3	699	Aug 11, 2005 by hvnly1
	List to Live By (Preview) Everyone needs this list to live by!!! habit.................................................... Joy.................................................................... The greatest loss..............	Peggy7	1	622	Aug 10, 2005 by Mandi
	Illinois State Alanon Convention (Preview) Anyone in the midwest, this is near Chicago in Bloomingdale, IL. 2005 IL State Alanon Convention, Oct 7th -9th, 2005 with AA participation. Contact: kayakillinois@yahoo.com or go to: www.niafg.org and click on Events. Costs: Alanon $...	wallsal55	0	933	Aug 10, 2005 by wallsal55
	What Do You Do With The VOID? (Preview) Somedays are pretty neat, but then some days are just pretty empty. Some of my days have purpose enough for me. Some days I wander. I know I am waiting patiently for my HP to fill the void. Patience. Patience. :y...	wallsal55	8	788	Aug 10, 2005 by wallsal55
	Don't Leave Me All By Myself (Preview) Hi all, I am getting my youngest son ready to leave for college. He keeps playing a Moby produced song over and over again called In My World that starts out "Lordie, don't leave me all by myself". How fitting for me. My A husband has been gone all summer golfing, finding himself, and "getting away from...	nmike	4	679	Aug 10, 2005 by Peggy7
	Touchy Subject regarding KIds (Preview) Ok I have a question, I am asking this for some tools, and I really need some help. For those of you who have/ had children: What do you tell them when their parent (the "A") doesn't come home because the "A" is out drinking/using? And what do you tell them when the "A" finally does come home and is d...	Dolphin123	7	688	Aug 10, 2005 by mamasan
	Snoring (Preview) My A is behind me snoring after being out until three in the morning. I she just finished days of very hard work and her birthday is this week...funny but I came up with a saying last night when I was laying in bed waiting for her..."reason # 365." Meaning A's will find 365 good r...	Stephanie	2	596	Aug 10, 2005 by marmare
	hi everyone (Preview) Hi I know that it has been quite a while since I have posted and I just want to check in. I have been keeping bussy this summer doing things with the kids. I am doing good and have really noticed the progress of my program and keeping bussy helps alot to keep the focus on me. This summer ha...	jj	3	600	Aug 10, 2005 by nmike
	Get my gun and start the barbecue (Preview) After about dieing going and getting feed in this hot, sticky, icky, horrible, bright, sunshine... and getting groceries. OH no could not go early when it is cool. Have to put it off. After all this, I drive home, get out and see FeeFee is in distress. She is my tame white turkey, I am chasin...	debilyn	10	884	Aug 10, 2005 by Christy
	Sooooo Tired (Preview) Just coming off a short period of sobriety with my A...he's back to drinking. soooooooo tired... ...can't stand to hear one more time..."I'll get better"...empty words Opened the credit card bill today...he spent over $1000 on booze and cigarettes last month I went for a job interview tod...	hurtinginindy	2	612	Aug 10, 2005 by Carol
	Help, I think I am going CRAZY (Preview) I am writing this to seek opinions/advise or just validations of my emotions. My husband is an "A" . He grew up in an enviroment where both parents were alcoholics. His grandparents were alcoholics and family drank at every occasion. We have been married for almost 19 years and I can ho...	Tammy	6	680	Aug 10, 2005 by megan
	The power of LOVE (Preview) You need it. I need it.They need it. Whoever THEY are. Love brings us to it like a moth to a flame. So, I've been hurt. You've been hurt. They've been hurt. Do not be mean. Don't treat someone in a way you wouldn't want to be treated. Come on now really, would...	hvnly1	3	809	Aug 10, 2005 by kismetstrand
	haxi-gonian III (Preview) [[ room ]] Ogden, Utah (1030 mountain, 1230 eastern) It seems I needed the room-night worse than I thought. I found a room near the meeting place to make life easier. The meeting itself was quite large, around 30 people and the topic was courage (apropos, dontcha think?). Good to see so many in...	haximon	5	631	Aug 9, 2005 by kathy570
	Bad Therapist - (mommy I love u) (Preview) My mother & step-father made it to their second session with this "family therapist". I am so disturbed about the behaviour of this woman doctor, I am actually horrified. She is jumping to judgement, feeding the A answers, telling my mother she is unreasonable, because she is setting bou...	kitty	2	675	Aug 9, 2005 by dove
	Moving forward (Preview) Moving forward was one of the topics of last nights online meeting. I am working very hard on moving forward. This is after 3 1/2 years of stagnation and hoping things would change. Waiting around for things to change. Wishing that my life was different. But last July I found ala...	megan	10	678	Aug 9, 2005 by mom to 2
	persception of reality and behavior (Preview) I have to share with you all the messed up perspective that my A exhibited last night and you will all understand and maybe get a chuckle. He wanted to use the phone. So in that ever so polite way, I'm sure some of you will understand the abusive nature of the demon, says, Bleepity, ble...	Sallen	3	717	Aug 9, 2005 by kitty
	Repeating an Oldie - Comes A Dawn (Preview) Comes A Dawn After awhile you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul. And you learn that love doesn't mean leaning, And company doesn't mean security, And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts, And presents aren't promises, And you begin to accept your defea...	kismetstrand	1	593	Aug 9, 2005 by TLC2
	expectations (Preview) Has someone ever said something to you that took a long time for you to fully understand? This recently happened to me, it was an epiphany.As many of you know my 1st husband died 4 1/2 years ago of an alcohol induced condition. He died sober and happy. At some point he had said to me "I'm &nb...	swolves	4	726	Aug 9, 2005 by kitty
	Resentment/Forgiveness (Preview) “Resentment will do nothing except tear us apart inside. No one ever found serenity through hatred. No one ever truly recovered from the effects of alcoholism by harboring anger or fear or by holding onto grudges….Forgiveness is no favor. We do it for no one but ourselves….Alth...	kismetstrand	0	800	Aug 9, 2005 by kismetstrand
	Humility (Preview) From Courage to Change, Feb. 2, pg. 33. "Today, being humble means climbing down from the ladder of judgement of myself and others, and taking my rightful place in a worldwide circle of love and support." May 21, pg 142. "Humility is said to be perpetual quietness of the heart. It means that I do m...	kismetstrand	0	661	Aug 9, 2005 by kismetstrand
	From AFG Headquarters - (fyi) (Preview) Dear Al-Anon/Alateen Members, At our World Service Office we have experienced an increase in expenses as we have increased our services to the fellowship: Half-price Forum subscriptions offer for groups Increased US and Canadian Public Outreach Activities Free public out...	kismetstrand	0	544	Aug 9, 2005 by kismetstrand
	I got a question about meetings... (Preview) I found meetings in my area finally but the page I printed out has "beginner meetings and regular meetings" do I go to a beginner meeting. I am new to this and I am not sure of the protocal. If anyone knows what I have to do or bring please let me know. Thank you	kimmie	2	590	Aug 9, 2005 by lin0606
	What I have learned (top Twenty) (Preview) 1. It is not my fault. 2. I can't cure it. 3. I can leave it. 4. Our kids are most important. 5. I deserve alot. 6. I deserve to be loved and to love. 7. I know the county sheriff's phone number. ...	tullemars	7	647	Aug 9, 2005 by Dolphin123
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.