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Hope for Today Feb 25
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about our slogan Let It Begin With Me. The writer interprets it as the message of al-anon we may carry to others in need, and that if asked we might share our experience in the program but that does not include an expectation of a response or how it may be received...
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yanksfan51
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3
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350
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CTC 02/24/18
(Preview)
Today's reading suggests that we focus our attention on looking inward to search out the negative defects that exist and harm our decision making process. It points out that a 4th Step inventory need not be painful but a brief look within to see why we do what we do and say what we say. It is important t...
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lookingup
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3
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773
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Hello...new here
(Preview)
Hi everyone, so happy to have found this board, Hopefully the 3rd time will be the charm with trying to post my introduction! So here is my story, as brief as possible. My husband and I married young, basically right out of high-school, (hindsight, not a great idea) shortly after my husband started dri...
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Finding grace
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12
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445
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Thoughts and Feelings relapse....
(Preview)
I fooled myself. Celebrated my 39th year in recovery and got my chip (XXXIX) and must have unconsciously celebrated the false assumption that It was done now...gone away...never to be seen or heard of....LOL .NOT!! I got fooled after taking an inventory of what it was like then and doing the rela...
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Jerry F
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19
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1052
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First Meet Since Move-Out
(Preview)
Today was tax day. Appointment was made a year ago b/c they get so booked. At first I tried to do things through my STBXRAH's sister, as I was not strong enough to constantly talk with him about what was needed for this appointment. Then last week he called and said that he needed to start to manage things o...
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PosiesandPuppies
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7
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989
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OT - Response??
(Preview)
Ok, I don't have an easy relationship with my mother. She just had her very best friend like her person pass suddenly and I know this is devastating. UGH .. I don't want to think about it this was a woman who knew my mother since the 70's. It was highly unexpected. I am beside myself though in terms of I h...
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SerenityRUS
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16
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1133
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dealing with shoulds
(Preview)
Today I am going to rest without the guilt. There is so much work to be done around my home. I always beat myself up because I think I am a lousy housekeeper. I have told myself many times that I should be doing more. I compare myself to this imaginary supermom that can do all things. I am replacing that with a...
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kath
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14
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1003
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Courage to Change 2/23/18
(Preview)
Today's reading talks about care-taking and enabling. The writer suggests that even as a child, she had grown-up responsibilities. This taught her to give to others first and to dive into any crisis without any thoughts of self. In recovery, she learned that this was a form of self-destructiven...
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Iamhere
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1
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382
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prayer & faith
(Preview)
Prayer is asking for rain. Faith is bringing an umbrella!
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Hoot Nanny
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6
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505
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Call Me the Breeze
(Preview)
Hi, friends. Busy busy, but I thought I'd pop by and say hello. You know, I pulled a word out of my god box just the other day. Insanity. You know how that one goes. We define insanity as continuing to do the same thing, expecting different results. Last month I got a call from that transition house I used to...
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Wolfie55
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4
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563
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New To Al-anon
(Preview)
Hello everyone I had not heard anything about Alanon until today. You see my husband of 20 years is an alcoholic and has been since before we were married. He was not as bad (well really not bad at all) with his drinking as it is now. The incidents that occured from him last night validated my fears about t...
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Dynamite
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10
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761
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Emotional abuse or alcoholic behavior?
(Preview)
Help! My functiong alcoholic partner has been on one today and I'm left feeling hurt and confused. My partner phoned me in work today. To cut a long story short, he got in a huff about something I said over th3 phone that I thought was perfectly reasonable. He hung up the phone on me. Later on when I got h...
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Lil99
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12
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668
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Let go let god...What does this mean???
(Preview)
I have been thinking about letting go and letting god. I have been thinking about this and it sounds simple. I am struggling with it. Could it mean that faced with sharp and painful disillusionment, I must surrender my grasp on my possession, desires and everything else I have known. maybe letting...
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fishinmama
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15
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9851
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Courage to Change 2/22/18
(Preview)
Good morning MIP! Today's reading is about decision-making. I really like the quote: "When I used to make specific requests (of God), I was so busy waiting for them to be granted that I didn't realize the answers were staring me in the face." The reminder is: With the help of a Higher Power, decision...
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Iamhere
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2
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326
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Verbal Abuse
(Preview)
I am new to Al-Anon and have been reading One Day At A Time with Al-Anon. It talks a lot about focusing on me and the things that I can do to make myself healthy. But at what point does that include giving up on an AH? I hear people say that it is the disease that makes him so mean. He never hits, but his words...
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hicktownmom
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6
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426
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Alcohol in Other Relationships
(Preview)
2017 was a year of bad alcohol for my family and I. There were too many drunken tirades which finally culminated in a near tragic incident that forced my ExAW out of the home and into rehab. I caught the brunt of the fallout and it left me reeling. I'm still dealing with it in some ways. One thing that's com...
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WestMan
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8
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652
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Courage to Change February 21
(Preview)
Hello MIP! Today's reading in Courage to Change is about sponsorship and Tradition 10. Tradition Ten states that "The Al-Anon Family Groups have no opinion on outside issues; hence our name ought never be drawn into public controversy." The author shares that the spirit of tradition 10 allows A...
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Skorpi
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3
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495
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Actually hate this day
(Preview)
Yea, I do. I guess because it's all hyped to be all about love/commitment/etc. I have learned over the years to try and treat it like it's any other normal day... but it is hard when it is splattered as advertisement everywhere! In the past I have tried to do things for myself, and also to get my kid involve...
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PosiesandPuppies
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12
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564
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The things I can't control ..
(Preview)
I am really struggling today and I am learning which is all good however WOW WOW WOW .. this has been a week of lessons .. not all of which I have been thrilled with. My oldest in college is still struggling with some health issues that I am finding out are brought on by themselves not taking care of themselv...
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SerenityRUS
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9
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617
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Alcoholic love of my life
(Preview)
When I met him I fell in love hard and fast. I am 7 years older than him and that scared me and still scares me. He's 25 and still a little immature and can be selfish. Very infrequently but it can happen. He's also a very high functioning alcoholic. His father was an alcoholic who passed away from liver canc...
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MrsBear
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11
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556
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ODAT Reading 2-20-2018
(Preview)
he ODAT reading for February 20th speaks about the importance of the tool of" detachment". The reading suggests that whether we are living with someone who is still drinking or not, the situation calls for patience, acceptance and resolution. It suggests that we can acquire these qualities by det...
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hotrod
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3
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392
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Flipped the Script
(
1 2 3 4
)
(Preview)
My AW and I are moving towards divorce. I believe it is the best thing I can do for myself now. Last week's incident ( some of you saw my other post) was an extreme display of the constant badness that runs in our relationship. My wife is truly a wonderful person but also disturbed in many ways. She also suff...
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WestMan
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145
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10471
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Reunion this weekend...
(Preview)
Hi Y'all... The feature recovery centre in my country has been closed down for over 20 years. 20 or thirty years ago many people from my town went through the centre. 12 or 15 of us. All were going to AA or Alanon when they went and most did well afterwards. My father's step-dad was a doctor and an alcoholi...
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DavidG
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10
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684
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C2C, 2/19
(Preview)
5th Step-The writer reflects upon writing her 4th Step, and reaching the 5th. She saw that many of her behaviors paralleled the alcoholic, except she did them sober: blaming others, took everything personally, insanity, and many responses were fear based. She didn't see change right away, but...
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Lyne
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6
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421
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Courage to Change 2/16/18
(Preview)
Good morning MIP - Happy Friday. Today's reminder -- The times I most want to hide out with my secrets are probably the times I most need to reach out and share them with others. When facing a difficult situation, let me remember that my Higher Power speaks through other people. I don't have to face it...
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Iamhere
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5
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470
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Hope for Today feb 18
(Preview)
Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is about how making an 8th are list, of people we have harmed, may include ourselves. I know over the course of time, when I became in a situation that was not healthy for me, or made a decision that was not good for me I did not see it as harming myself. After having b...
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yanksfan51
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3
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452
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We are not a religion...
(Preview)
Okay this post is a reaction to the previous post using the theme "There but for the grace of God". When and where I got into program I found myself attending meetings on the grounds of a religious sect and I balked because religion was one of the addictions in my life which tore up family relationships...
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Jerry F
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14
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602
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CTC 02/17/18
(Preview)
C2C reading for today talks about FAITH. It suggests that fears loom large and that Faith takes a great deal of practice. Faith becomes real when we are in a situation and can see no way out that is when we can stop and ask for guidance That is when I see that a miracle can happen and that unexpected help a...
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lookingup
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3
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431
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Enabling?
(Preview)
My addicted fiance is working on his recovery. I have been going to AlAnon meetings for my own sanity. But I still feel like his mother when we are home. I make sure the bills get paid (with little or no contribution from him, building resentment), I clean the house daily, wash dishes, do laundry, and put...
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Engaged2Drugs
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3
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599
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Why is my ex ringing me because they’ve relapsed
(Preview)
I havent had any contact with them for 2 months. During that time theyâve not had a drink and now this week Iâve been drunk dialled. Telling me all about their problems and that they need me In their life they miss me.
I said ring me sober and out the phone down. What do I make of this? Do you think their bein...
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CarlyH
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5
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470
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over the valentines day slump...
(Preview)
Today is a new day & I am over the valentines day sadness. I celebrated my dads birthday w joy & sadness. Tears & smiles. Even laughter! He was born on a saints day. Does that make him a saint?
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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421
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A Character Defect
(Preview)
Once again, I have blown up at an unsuspecting good person that just happened to be there when I got very irritable. I immediately regretted it and tried to apologize but I could tell she was very hurt. We are volunteers at a charitable agency and work side by side every Friday afternoon. It is not the f...
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MovieGal
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6
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687
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The loneliness in a marriage with an A
(Preview)
I do not know why I stay. He is at AA meetings, I spend most evenings alone. I have a job, friends, church group, etc but the emptiness from being married to a man who is incapable of really ever loving me is beginning to take its toll. Why do I stay in this marriage? He can never meet my needs the way a normal he...
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Laura2018
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13
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859
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Another update - life on life's terms.
(Preview)
Hi there all. I really just need to share my process around something. Background: my husband is in rehab and I am overseas (in my country of origin let's call it B- (( sorry for being so mysterious its just the two countries are kinda unusual and it would compromise my anonymity to share them I believe)...
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AnnieFenk321
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5
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590
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How to handle feelings of sadness
(Preview)
Happy Valentineâs Day! Today I am thankful for my three little loves and that the sun is shining and it is warmer today. But today I am also sad. I am sad that this disease has affected my life and my husbandâs life and our marriage. Iâm sad that I feel completely disconnected from my husband and that I feel...
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Holly73
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8
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623
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Courage to Change 2/15/18
(Preview)
Good morning MIP. Today's reading discusses practice in recovery and how that leads to a different outcome than before! The quote is from Aristotle, and speaks to me --- "We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit." In recovery, we talk about working the program - wh...
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Iamhere
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2
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401
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Resentful - having to defend that I need a meeting
(Preview)
Pretty much everyone, everyone, I have ever been related with has been active addicts. Today I wake up and my thoughts are suddenly occupied by a former friendship - being drawn right back into the situation; quite a few steps back. Am I suddenly not an al-anon valid individual? Do you know what i...
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ieei
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5
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459
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ODAT Reading 2-13
(Preview)
The ODAT reading for February 13 speaks to the fact that in Al-Anon we concentrate on looking at our own mistakes to see how we have contributed to the destruction in our lives . The reading suggests that we were not living in a vacuum with the alcoholic doing all the damage. We reacted in many ways and th...
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hotrod
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3
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788
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Not nice ..
(Preview)
Over the past year I have learned a lot about myself and I am grateful for the experiences I have had, .. they have given me a lot of time to reflect on a few things. I want to clarify .. my XAH is an ass .. that hasn't gone away .. LOL .. at some point with enough program I may be open to it .. at this time I pray for t...
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SerenityRUS
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5
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487
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update - husband in rehab - decided to stay with my mum
(Preview)
Hello all, I just wanted to quickly update on my situation. I am still here in my home country, living with my mother and my son, while my husband is in rehab in the country where we all lived until recently. I heard from the rehab today and they say that he is doing well. I am not really sure what that means i...
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AnnieFenk321
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7
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522
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How do I support my alcoholic brother?
(Preview)
Hi all, My brother (in his 40's) recently talked to me about being an alcoholic, and how he's even been to an AA meeting a couple times. This was in the context of how terrible his life is right now. He's been drinking all his money, and his current workplace is having trouble staying in business, so h...
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concernedbrother
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10
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671
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Brand Spanking New
(Preview)
Brand new to this group and looking for advice. I am confident that I cannot get through this by myself but I donât know where to start. I have been online reading for hours and listened to a phone meeting this morning. Everyone was sharing about their own recovery I am completely overwhelmed. Is there a...
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Rosepro
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6
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533
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managing desire
(Preview)
Hi all, I've been in the program for a little over a year, have 2 young kids, and am in the process of separating from my AH of 12 years. We have had zero physical or emotional intimacy for over a year, and I have a lot of pent up energy. Preparing for separation and divorce is liberating, and I thank the prog...
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yolanda
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11
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707
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Inspired to seek out al anon
(Preview)
"that no bearer shall bear anothers burden" http://al-quran.info/#53:38 https://www.random.org/ Generate random number 1-114 and 1-number-of-verses-in-chapter I tweeted this, having found it through above method - although segments of holy books selected as the content pool, in Janua...
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ieei
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3
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461
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Courage to Change February 14
(Preview)
To those who celebrate the holiday, happy Valentine's Day! With today's reading in Courage to Change, the slogan "When in doubt, don't" came to mind. The author shares that, in those times when they felt the most need to find an immediate solution were also those times when they were not yet ready to...
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Skorpi
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4
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854
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all new to me
(Preview)
Thiss topic was posted to the alanon Business board by Post InfoTOPIC: All new to me...CASphilbrook l new to me...Permalink Reply Quote More I'm new to this, new to alanon. I've read a lot of different posts and I feel like mine may seem minor to most others. I met my husband 11 years ago. He was...
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hotrod
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5
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533
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QTIP
(Preview)
I did a search here and read old posts about QTIP.Instead of bumping one of them up and digging up old "dirt" from years ago,I decided to start a new thread. Last night,someone blamed me for something that I didn't do,something that had absolutely nothing to do with me at all.Actually,it was such a pet...
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SoggySlippers
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6
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611
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Slogans as Meeting Topic
(Preview)
How do I know which slogans are considered approved by Al-Anon? I want to use the topic of Al-Anon slogans and how we apply them to our lives when I lead our meeting next week, but don't want to share slogans which aren't CAL approved. Your input would be greatly appreciated, as I don't want to ruffle any f...
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Green Eyes
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11
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4876
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Fear, but took action
(Preview)
Hi all, I'm rambling here. I've been dealing with some health issues in my broken thinking............I keep thinking they are just simply going to go away if I eat right and keep on putting one foot in front of the other. I guess that fits in with "denial" and fear. I looked at the calendar and it's been o...
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Tude
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5
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669
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Me thinking ..
(Preview)
Which let's be clear I get into trouble every damn time .. ugh. I had a comedy of errors go on over this weekend. First was I had the nerve to go out with a girlfriend I hadn't seen in 6 months and my youngest had a dance. My poor boyfriend missed the whole parenting part of his kids because he played a very s...
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SerenityRUS
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2
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448
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Control Issues
(Preview)
Hi all, sorry for the long post. I'm really stewing over this one! I had a conversation with my AW last night at dinner that just isn't sitting well with me. I'm stewing over it, and I think I've put my finger on why it isn't feeling right, but I hope some of you can give me some ESH so I can think more clearly ab...
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Skorpi
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13
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1136
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ESH please- feeling scared, angry, unsure
(Preview)
Hello all,
It's been a long while since I posted last. I've been working hard at making my marriage work and trying to be strong. Yesterday we crossed the bridge I knew was inevitably in our path with my AH heavy daily drinking. His health is now affected. He got scared when he discovered blood inhis sto...
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Elabella
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13
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719
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Quick update
(Preview)
After AHâs relapse 2 weeks ago, I was concerned he wouldnât be willing to keep working on his issues. Iâve been pleasantly surprised though. No more episodes since then and our relationship is continuing to improve. A lot of the little things that mean so much and have been missing for a long time have s...
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Twinkies
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4
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543
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C2C, 2/12
(Preview)
Detachment: The writer comments that detachment is easy with casual friends, but not with loved ones. He says that with family, he is likely to take on their negative frame of mind. He says he needs to pay attention to his own mood, so he does not take on the mood of someone else. Today's Reminder: If...
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Lyne
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5
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488
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Observations/perspectives/aging
(Preview)
SO, this is totally off topic from program. I'm sure many of you can relate, though. I took a job at a company where I worked over 20 years ago and I worked there for 4 years in various roles/departments. One of the things I loved(and still do) about it is that it is so diverse culturally and, to some degre...
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andromeda
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6
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589
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Hope for Today Feb 11
(Preview)
Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is about the unique relationship we develop with our sponsors. The writer describes how difficult it was in the beginning, to trust that her sponsor would not run away after hearing all of the terrible facts about her, and how there were times she would actually...
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yanksfan51
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5
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482
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ESH needed for No Drinking but No Program
(Preview)
Hi Everyone - I could really use some ESH.....here's what is happening that I've alluded to but haven't posted on yet. My AH is on day 11 of using naltrexone to not drink but that's it; he's not in any program and has underlying anxiety (and most likely depression??) which has probably contributed to...
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jtpickle
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6
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674
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Great news
(Preview)
my last post here I shared my great news about daughter and family coming back to live in the states from Japan, waiting on news of where they will living at here in states finally came,,,they'll be living in Las Vegas , more great news.i know how much of a relief that must be, now it's the transition part,...
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lookingup
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6
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545
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Courage to Change 2/9/18
(Preview)
Today's reading is about "keep it simple", so I will try to do just that. The reading discusses how non-simple life was before recovery - stressful job, limited/no time, obsessive focus on the A and denial about all of the above! Al-Anon, when we practice it, brings about awareness and a breakage of t...
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Iamhere
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6
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662
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CTC. 2-10
(Preview)
C2C reading for sat 2-10 speaks of how we do not appreciate our talents and creative gifts after living with the disese of alcoholism. It suggests that we take the time, to look within and discover the creative energy that dwells within. Once we see this energy we can develop this energy by tak...
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lookingup
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7
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565
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