Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

Today's reading is about unacceptable behavior. The writer shares about their experience growing up in an alcoholic home where they experienced unhealthy behaviors particularly criticism from others. They had trouble sorting out acceptable behavior from unacceptable behavior. The reading...

SoggySlippers · SoggySlippers

When I am caught up in the obsession of what my AH is or isn't doing,there's problems between us(of course).My controlling ways cause many huge arguments and make me feel miserable.If I try to talk to him about anything he completely shuts me out and gives me the silent treatment.It's like a punishmen...

pumkin26 · pumkin26

Hi All, just thought I would pop up here today as it marks 1 yr of recovery- for ME. A year ago, crying and broken, mad and hurt- I would've never thought in a year this is where I would be- today I am very thankful for everyone here that helped me in those early days and overall very thankful and grateful to Al...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Does anyone have any ESH on not having kids for one reason or another? Need to let go of the dream at 51?

Iamhere · Iamhere

Hey all... I am on mobile and don't see where to send private messages... I usually post a daily each Thu and Fri, and have no literature with me... Can someone please take care of tomorrow? Thanks in advance...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading is about learning and practicing to do and be different. The writer talks about how attending meetings helps us learn new ways of working our recovery program. She attended one, and the chairperson passed around a basket full of slogan. She asked that each person take one, and try...

Jerry F · Jerry F

It isn't only about not drinking ...is it. I so related to this page and what he was sharing. Seeing the big picture is 20/20 eyesight. Gratitude lists are a must. (((hugs)))

StarryAmmo · StarryAmmo

I have never asked for help or guidance outside of HP. I've been reading posts upon more posts. My AH has progressed to the point of not being able to hold a job. We've been married 27 yrs. Raised 3 children who are all moved out. He progressively got to where we are now. He's always been addicted to one sub...

lgnutah · lgnutah

I have a 37 year old college educated daughter who suffers from what seems to be anxiety/depression/ocd exacerbated by alcoholism/prescription and other drug abuse, and a tragic history of domestic violence and sexual assault. She has seemingly adopted the emotional abuse which was heaped on he...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Today's reading in Courage to Change is about the beauty we each hold inside. The author shares that, after living with a disease of attitudes for a lifetime, they did not think that anything good would come out of their efforts, because they didn't have self confidence or self esteem. The author lea...

Skorpi · Skorpi

In my home group, we have been working the steps as a group on Thursday nights. I've found it useful to work through them again. Today, I came home from my Sunday meeting to a cheerful wife. We walked our Chloe, and met the neighbors from across the street for the first time. We stayed and chatted with the...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Well I was in there & didn't know how to respond. Can anyone tell me how? I want to go back in there.

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

This one has really been on my mind lately especially as I deal with my oldest. What is the difference between the issue of Responsibility vs Expectation for me. In watching my oldest struggle pretty hard this past semester one thing I have really seen is that what are my expectations in terms of beha...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODAT reading for March 6 things about the importance of anonymity between Al-Anon members and while attending an Al-Anon meetings. The reading points out that what we hear in meetings or what is shared between each member must be held in confidence and kept locked in our minds and hearts, We can al...

CASphilbrook · CASphilbrook

I accidentally posted in the business forum a while ago. I'm new to this. My husband is (was) a recovering alcoholic. When I met him he went to just about every meeting nearby. Work and other responsibilities reduced the times he attended. But if he ever started getting in a "mood", I would very nicely l...

Jennifer617 · Jennifer617

Iâm really struggling with my husband. He is unable to stay sober, Iâm not sure at what point I should leave. Iâm new to all of this. Any advice ?

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for March 3 speaks about the fourth step. The reading indicates that if we look inward deeply enough we may find that many of our attitudes, and actions and unrealistic, immature and childlike. It then goes on to explain what mature behavior looks like which includes: " knowing ours...

Elabella · Elabella

So here I am hiding in my bedroom because Iâm avoiding AH who is on a complete rampage on me. He got angry at me when I suggested he should not come to friends of the family tonight. Our daughter is going over to sleepover. He wants to go over to have a talk with our friend. She is dealing with a lot today- havin...

CedarTexas · CedarTexas

So my story, my fiance slipped 4 weeks ago after being sober for 400+ days. We have known each other since we were 11, but had not been in touch for 20 years until we reconnected in 2016. When we first reconnected she told me that she was an alcoholic and was in recovery, at that time only for 6 months, but sh...

Lyne · Lyne

Character defects: The writer discussed her fear of removing her defects. She imagined herself like Swiss cheese, full of holes. But she soon learned that by working the steps, all she lost were the things she didn't need. Then she had room for her strengths, skills, and feelings. Today 's rem...

ginnyc · ginnyc

hello I have been around reading the post, getting a lot of useful information and help but never posted. I am an adult children of an alcoholic. very abusive and dysfunctional. My family finally got out from under the physical abusive stuff when I was 17 when the alcoholic left. Anyway, fast forward,...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning Everyone: Todays reading is about the difficulties we might face when making decisions. The writer notes that in the effort to make the perfect decision, instead he/she can be almost paralyzed considering all the possible effects the decision may have. In order to sort out a directio...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Awareness Acceptance Action right? I picked these out of my box this morning. Since then I have been more aware of what I have to deal w what is in front of me. Acceptance is a real big issue for me. I read in the AA big book that acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. Or issues. Now I am taking act...

Elabella · Elabella

Good Morning all. So this morning while going through my 14 yr olds social media I saw her post videos of her and her friends doing shots! Ugh! She was over at a friends for a sleepover- which was a Godsend because AH was having an episode. Iâm so worried . I donât know how to deal with this. I know as a teenage...

Jennifer617 · Jennifer617

Iâm really struggling with my husband. He is unable to stay sober, Iâm not sure at what point I should leave. Iâm new to all of this. Any advice ?

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I fell a little while ago. I guess winter is still here up here. I & other people in my town were hoping for an early spring & we might just get it but not yet! We still have the blessing of seeing God's handiwork--the snow. I am sitting at the library as I used to do when I didn't have a tablet & a sm...

MeTwo2 · MeTwo2

So the other night my daughter and i talked about going to a movie .. we decided on the movie we want .. the next night when it was time to go .. she said in the car would you mind if we went to this other movie instead .. I began to really want to see the movie we were originally going to see and i said no .. i Really w...

Wolfie55 · Wolfie55

My wife Nancy and I have been coming to MIP for about 15 years. We used to use the old IRC channels, but now we just use the web. Anyway, I been in and out of here over the years, I hang around for a while, then I disappear. I just recently returned and this time I set up Nancy's old account. Nancy is an old school...

Elabella · Elabella

Just wanted to leave a positive note for a change. Today I had the pleasure of taking part in a really great online meeting. Iâm thankful for hearing everyoneâs shares. I felt more at ease and happy when it was over. So for today, right now in this moment- Iâm in a happy place and thankful for these boards a...

AnnieFenk321 · AnnieFenk321

My husband asked me to tell him when to call me from rehab. I gave him two times. It is possible the wires got crossed because he doesnât have his own phone and I had to pass on a message. Either way, he missed both times without a word to me. I feel heartbroken. I have been feeling very positively toward...

wifeofalcoholic · wifeofalcoholic

I know that alcoholism is a disease and even with attempts at sobriety with meetings and counselors, there can be relapses. My AH drinks every few months and this has been the way it has been for years. When that happens, I feel angry. He lies and then confesses. I am tired of it. I share my feelings wh...

PosiesandPuppies · PosiesandPuppies

So my STBXRAH was finally served with his divorce papers this past weekend! Whew! One more thing off my plate... for now. That whole thing was a lesson in patience, that's for sure! At times it was hard for me to let it go, b/c I had the company that is helping with the divorce prodding me about getting him s...

AnnieFenk321 · AnnieFenk321

I have learned something being with my mum. When something goes wrong, she becomes anxious, swoops in and doesn't let me cope with it and learn myself. My car broke down, we plugged it into the battery charger and then I went for a walk. When she came back it wasn't working and she called an organised a re...

Gemini31 · Gemini31

I'm 42 and in love with a functional alcoholic that I have been living with for 2 years. Since he has made changes to the frequency of the drinking he thinks he is fixed,but he's still hiding, lying, and drinking..I need help with making sure that this don't effect me anymore. I want to stop counting, que...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Good morning MIP and happy Friday! Today's reading talks about one of our great tools - CAL or Conference Approved Literature. The writer suggests that the literature taught her to replace a long-established, negative way of thinking with a new, healthier, more positive approach to life and lo...

blueskies18 · blueskies18

I just started attending alanon meetings after a 19 year hiatus from alanon. I go there and act like I'm an oldie. I know the steps, I know the slogans etc, and I have stories about how I overcame stuff thirty years ago. But I'm a newbie. The truth is I'm afraid to be vulnerable. I don't trust. I act li...

Jerry F · Jerry F

A person I have made up my mind to contact and make an amends to for something I selfishly did years ago which might have been very dangerous answered a FB request from me this morning. I had time to think my plan over and was in the process of taking control and at the keyboard of my computer when my wife w...

Elabella · Elabella

Hi everyone, Iâm really struggling right now mentally trying to deal with my AH. His denial runs very, very deep which exhausts me to no end. Now to add to the matter, he is under a ton of stress in regards to life, finances, our marriage, his broken ties with his family. Heâs been snapping out of nowhere...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I just want to be positive today * stay out of self-pity I also want to stay out of my head.

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Oh my! My mother is starting something again. Over & over. I am beginning to think that she doesn't live me or is capable of loving me anymore. I have taken so many emotional beatings in the last few years. I know she is sick but do I have to be dragged along w her? Some ESH us needed. I am desperate.

Iamhere · Iamhere

Good morning MIP. Today's reading is about knowledge and how what we know might change as we embrace recovery. Knowledge is helpful to look at the past for information about ourselves. We can learn a ton from inventories, memories, and reasoning things out with others. Yet - waiting for insight...

hotrod · hotrod

Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery together! Step 3 has been posted to the Step Work Board here is the link: http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t64420142/alano...

Jerry F · Jerry F

This is an attachment and continuation to a post from days ago regarding my 4th stepping. I got reminded that often times when I think I am done my Higher Power has issues and evidences I need to take a closer look at and I was cued at my morning meeting that this was again the case. While others were sha...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! Today's reading in courage to change is about the third step, turning our wills and lives over to the care of a higher power. The author shares that at first, they turned over only the really big problems, things about which the author had no choice and clearly no ability to control or impro...

Wolfie55 · Wolfie55

God has such a wry sense of humor. The word I pulled from my god box today was Action. I had planned to attend my home group(different fellowship) tonight because it's a birthday meeting. So, I figured I'd listen to the speaker tonight and see how he or she takes action in his or her program. Just before th...

Wolfie55 · Wolfie55

The word God gave me today is Expectations. In my experience, they are premeditated resentments. I place expectations on the people around me to act a certain way or do a certain thing and of course I don't tell them. I just expect them to know their role. They, being human, do not live up to my expectatio...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODAT reading February 27 speaks about attaining a new point of view. The reading suggests that if we listen attentively enough at meetings, read Al-Anon literature with concentration, we will absorb a new point of view. It points out that when we enter program we are always asking "why does he...

PeacefulLove · PeacefulLove

Hello Everyone! I am struggling a bit today. After spending a WONDERFUL weekend with my RAH on a mini vacation, we really had some time to connect. My Hubby is no doubt got a LOT on his plate these days with work stress, family drama (mainly his side of the family), and I know he is very concerned with try...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

So much has gotten me upset lately & I held some of it in an exploded! I am working my program to climb out of it. I don't need to lose it like I never walked into the doors of alanon. I don't remember the last time I got this upset so I think that might be a good thing! Bless you all for putting up w my ranting...

Wolfie55 · Wolfie55

Uh-oh. I can access this site with my phone. I could become addicted to miracles in progress. Little play on words. I suppose there are worse things to be addicted to.

Lyne · Lyne

Mistakes and shame: The reading talks about the fact that we all make mistakes, and we can learn from those we've made. We can make amends, and change our behavior and attitudes. The writer further says that the biggest obstacle about learning this process is shame. Shame prevents us from knowin...

aabbcc1 · aabbcc1

I'm 24 years old and I would love for someone who has left a rough relationship with an alcoholic to private message me. I feel absolutely lost and I really need to talk to someone. Please

Katy F · Katy F

Does Al-Anon take a stance on co-sponsorship? I have 20 years in program and do not feel I need guidance to do step work. I do need a trusted friend to share my recovery and process some step 10 work from time to time. I would like someone to share experiences with step 11 and 12.

lilkbbk · lilkbbk

I have been going through this in my head for months now and finally did it last night...I told my husband that he was going to have to move out if the drinking did not stop. I have never actually said those words before and it was the hardest thing I have had to do. The only problem is that he told me I am being a...

Wolfie55 · Wolfie55

Yesterday morning, right after I read the reading from ODAAT, I reached into my god-box and pulled out the word Gratitude. I remember reading somewhere, in one of the fellowships I am in, that gratitude is not about having everything I want, but wanting everything I have. Coincidentally, my wife and...

AnnieFenk321 · AnnieFenk321

Hi there, I am grateful to say that after how ever many months of feeling like whenever I shared I was updating on the next installment in some kind of protracted soap opera, I don't have much to update practically speaking. I am still living with my mother. It has all kinds of unique challenges. I miss...

Wolfie55 · Wolfie55

Hi. How are ya? I stopped by the conference on the way to work this morning. There were several meetings going on at once. I chose one on Alanon slogans. It was pretty good. I didn't share. I chose to Listen, but one that kept coming up was How Important Is It. I like that one. Be interested to hear any though...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about our slogan Let It Begin With Me. The writer interprets it as the message of al-anon we may carry to others in need, and that if asked we might share our experience in the program but that does not include an expectation of a response or how it may be received...

lookingup · lookingup

Today's reading suggests that we focus our attention on looking inward to search out the negative defects that exist and harm our decision making process. It points out that a 4th Step inventory need not be painful but a brief look within to see why we do what we do and say what we say. It is important t...

Finding grace · Finding grace

Hi everyone, so happy to have found this board, Hopefully the 3rd time will be the charm with trying to post my introduction! So here is my story, as brief as possible. My husband and I married young, basically right out of high-school, (hindsight, not a great idea) shortly after my husband started dri...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Hope for Today March 9 (Preview) Today's reading is about unacceptable behavior. The writer shares about their experience growing up in an alcoholic home where they experienced unhealthy behaviors particularly criticism from others. They had trouble sorting out acceptable behavior from unacceptable behavior. The reading...	tiredtonite	12	1008	Mar 10, 2018 by Iamhere
	A Vicious Cycle (Preview) When I am caught up in the obsession of what my AH is or isn't doing,there's problems between us(of course).My controlling ways cause many huge arguments and make me feel miserable.If I try to talk to him about anything he completely shuts me out and gives me the silent treatment.It's like a punishmen...	SoggySlippers	14	969	Mar 10, 2018 by pumkin26
	1 Yr, today! (Preview) Hi All, just thought I would pop up here today as it marks 1 yr of recovery- for ME. A year ago, crying and broken, mad and hurt- I would've never thought in a year this is where I would be- today I am very thankful for everyone here that helped me in those early days and overall very thankful and grateful to Al...	pumkin26	8	785	Mar 10, 2018 by pumkin26
	how to deal w not having kids? (Preview) Does anyone have any ESH on not having kids for one reason or another? Need to let go of the dream at 51?	Hoot Nanny	5	661	Mar 10, 2018 by MizzB
	Service Opportunity - Tomorrow (Preview) Hey all... I am on mobile and don't see where to send private messages... I usually post a daily each Thu and Fri, and have no literature with me... Can someone please take care of tomorrow? Thanks in advance...	Iamhere	4	667	Mar 9, 2018 by tiredtonite
	Courage to Change 3/8/18 (Preview) Today's reading is about learning and practicing to do and be different. The writer talks about how attending meetings helps us learn new ways of working our recovery program. She attended one, and the chairperson passed around a basket full of slogan. She asked that each person take one, and try...	Iamhere	3	676	Mar 8, 2018 by The1975jen
	Hope For Today 3/7/2018 (Preview) It isn't only about not drinking ...is it. I so related to this page and what he was sharing. Seeing the big picture is 20/20 eyesight. Gratitude lists are a must. (((hugs)))	Jerry F	4	677	Mar 8, 2018 by Iamhere
	1st Post Where to Start. Desperate!!! (Preview) I have never asked for help or guidance outside of HP. I've been reading posts upon more posts. My AH has progressed to the point of not being able to hold a job. We've been married 27 yrs. Raised 3 children who are all moved out. He progressively got to where we are now. He's always been addicted to one sub...	StarryAmmo	20	979	Mar 7, 2018 by Maresie
	Boundaries request isn't being respected (very long) (Preview) I have a 37 year old college educated daughter who suffers from what seems to be anxiety/depression/ocd exacerbated by alcoholism/prescription and other drug abuse, and a tragic history of domestic violence and sexual assault. She has seemingly adopted the emotional abuse which was heaped on he...	lgnutah	11	655	Mar 7, 2018 by Maresie
	Courage to Change March 7 (Preview) Today's reading in Courage to Change is about the beauty we each hold inside. The author shares that, after living with a disease of attitudes for a lifetime, they did not think that anything good would come out of their efforts, because they didn't have self confidence or self esteem. The author lea...	Skorpi	3	955	Mar 7, 2018 by Lyne
	A lesson in powerlessness (Preview) In my home group, we have been working the steps as a group on Thursday nights. I've found it useful to work through them again. Today, I came home from my Sunday meeting to a cheerful wife. We walked our Chloe, and met the neighbors from across the street for the first time. We stayed and chatted with the...	Skorpi	10	872	Mar 7, 2018 by Iamhere
	in the chatroom (Preview) Well I was in there & didn't know how to respond. Can anyone tell me how? I want to go back in there.	Hoot Nanny	10	676	Mar 6, 2018 by Hoot Nanny
	Responsibility Vs. Expectation (Preview) This one has really been on my mind lately especially as I deal with my oldest. What is the difference between the issue of Responsibility vs Expectation for me. In watching my oldest struggle pretty hard this past semester one thing I have really seen is that what are my expectations in terms of beha...	SerenityRUS	7	1391	Mar 6, 2018 by Maresie
	ODAT Reading 3-6-2018 (Preview) The ODAT reading for March 6 things about the importance of anonymity between Al-Anon members and while attending an Al-Anon meetings. The reading points out that what we hear in meetings or what is shared between each member must be held in confidence and kept locked in our minds and hearts, We can al...	hotrod	3	2011	Mar 6, 2018 by Lyne
	Still getting the hang of this (Preview) I accidentally posted in the business forum a while ago. I'm new to this. My husband is (was) a recovering alcoholic. When I met him he went to just about every meeting nearby. Work and other responsibilities reduced the times he attended. But if he ever started getting in a "mood", I would very nicely l...	CASphilbrook	5	670	Mar 6, 2018 by Iamhere
	When to seek a divorce? (Preview) Iâm really struggling with my husband. He is unable to stay sober, Iâm not sure at what point I should leave. Iâm new to all of this. Any advice ?	Jennifer617	11	1952	Mar 5, 2018 by SerenityRUS
	C2C reading 3-3-2018 (Preview) The C2C reading for March 3 speaks about the fourth step. The reading indicates that if we look inward deeply enough we may find that many of our attitudes, and actions and unrealistic, immature and childlike. It then goes on to explain what mature behavior looks like which includes: " knowing ours...	hotrod	12	2693	Mar 5, 2018 by hotrod
	Desperate for ESH... (Preview) So here I am hiding in my bedroom because Iâm avoiding AH who is on a complete rampage on me. He got angry at me when I suggested he should not come to friends of the family tonight. Our daughter is going over to sleepover. He wants to go over to have a talk with our friend. She is dealing with a lot today- havin...	Elabella	16	790	Mar 5, 2018 by MeTwo2
	Fiancé relapsed 90 days before wedding (Preview) So my story, my fiance slipped 4 weeks ago after being sober for 400+ days. We have known each other since we were 11, but had not been in touch for 20 years until we reconnected in 2016. When we first reconnected she told me that she was an alcoholic and was in recovery, at that time only for 6 months, but sh...	CedarTexas	18	856	Mar 5, 2018 by Iamhere
	C2C, 3/5 (Preview) Character defects: The writer discussed her fear of removing her defects. She imagined herself like Swiss cheese, full of holes. But she soon learned that by working the steps, all she lost were the things she didn't need. Then she had room for her strengths, skills, and feelings. Today 's rem...	Lyne	3	925	Mar 5, 2018 by Skorpi
	finally facing myself (Preview) hello I have been around reading the post, getting a lot of useful information and help but never posted. I am an adult children of an alcoholic. very abusive and dysfunctional. My family finally got out from under the physical abusive stuff when I was 17 when the alcoholic left. Anyway, fast forward,...	ginnyc	6	675	Mar 5, 2018 by MeTwo2
	Hope for Today Mar 4 (Preview) Good morning Everyone: Todays reading is about the difficulties we might face when making decisions. The writer notes that in the effort to make the perfect decision, instead he/she can be almost paralyzed considering all the possible effects the decision may have. In order to sort out a directio...	yanksfan51	5	929	Mar 5, 2018 by DavidG
	the 3 A's (Preview) Awareness Acceptance Action right? I picked these out of my box this morning. Since then I have been more aware of what I have to deal w what is in front of me. Acceptance is a real big issue for me. I read in the AA big book that acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. Or issues. Now I am taking act...	Hoot Nanny	4	2069	Mar 4, 2018 by Bo
	New situation.. (Preview) Good Morning all. So this morning while going through my 14 yr olds social media I saw her post videos of her and her friends doing shots! Ugh! She was over at a friends for a sleepover- which was a Godsend because AH was having an episode. Iâm so worried . I donât know how to deal with this. I know as a teenage...	Elabella	8	1007	Mar 4, 2018 by Elabella
	When to seek a divorce? (Preview) Iâm really struggling with my husband. He is unable to stay sober, Iâm not sure at what point I should leave. Iâm new to all of this. Any advice ?	Jennifer617	2	637	Mar 4, 2018 by MeTwo2
	I fell oh well... (Preview) I fell a little while ago. I guess winter is still here up here. I & other people in my town were hoping for an early spring & we might just get it but not yet! We still have the blessing of seeing God's handiwork--the snow. I am sitting at the library as I used to do when I didn't have a tablet & a sm...	Hoot Nanny	5	579	Mar 4, 2018 by Iamhere
	Just feelings ? (Preview) So the other night my daughter and i talked about going to a movie .. we decided on the movie we want .. the next night when it was time to go .. she said in the car would you mind if we went to this other movie instead .. I began to really want to see the movie we were originally going to see and i said no .. i Really w...	MeTwo2	9	876	Mar 4, 2018 by MeTwo2
	Who Dat Girl (Preview) My wife Nancy and I have been coming to MIP for about 15 years. We used to use the old IRC channels, but now we just use the web. Anyway, I been in and out of here over the years, I hang around for a while, then I disappear. I just recently returned and this time I set up Nancy's old account. Nancy is an old school...	Wolfie55	5	612	Mar 3, 2018 by DavidG
	Thankful.. (Preview) Just wanted to leave a positive note for a change. Today I had the pleasure of taking part in a really great online meeting. Iâm thankful for hearing everyoneâs shares. I felt more at ease and happy when it was over. So for today, right now in this moment- Iâm in a happy place and thankful for these boards a...	Elabella	6	863	Mar 3, 2018 by Elabella
	Just sad. (Preview) My husband asked me to tell him when to call me from rehab. I gave him two times. It is possible the wires got crossed because he doesnât have his own phone and I had to pass on a message. Either way, he missed both times without a word to me. I feel heartbroken. I have been feeling very positively toward...	AnnieFenk321	8	3472	Mar 3, 2018 by AnnieFenk321
	Detaching with Love (Preview) I know that alcoholism is a disease and even with attempts at sobriety with meetings and counselors, there can be relapses. My AH drinks every few months and this has been the way it has been for years. When that happens, I feel angry. He lies and then confesses. I am tired of it. I share my feelings wh...	wifeofalcoholic	2	631	Mar 2, 2018 by Jerry F
	Finally! (Preview) So my STBXRAH was finally served with his divorce papers this past weekend! Whew! One more thing off my plate... for now. That whole thing was a lesson in patience, that's for sure! At times it was hard for me to let it go, b/c I had the company that is helping with the divorce prodding me about getting him s...	PosiesandPuppies	13	962	Mar 2, 2018 by Maresie
	Character flaws (Preview) I have learned something being with my mum. When something goes wrong, she becomes anxious, swoops in and doesn't let me cope with it and learn myself. My car broke down, we plugged it into the battery charger and then I went for a walk. When she came back it wasn't working and she called an organised a re...	AnnieFenk321	8	708	Mar 2, 2018 by Maresie
	New at this (Preview) I'm 42 and in love with a functional alcoholic that I have been living with for 2 years. Since he has made changes to the frequency of the drinking he thinks he is fixed,but he's still hiding, lying, and drinking..I need help with making sure that this don't effect me anymore. I want to stop counting, que...	Gemini31	15	1631	Mar 2, 2018 by Maresie
	Courage to Change 3/2/18 (Preview) Good morning MIP and happy Friday! Today's reading talks about one of our great tools - CAL or Conference Approved Literature. The writer suggests that the literature taught her to replace a long-established, negative way of thinking with a new, healthier, more positive approach to life and lo...	Iamhere	3	579	Mar 2, 2018 by PosiesandPuppies
	HALT (Preview) I just started attending alanon meetings after a 19 year hiatus from alanon. I go there and act like I'm an oldie. I know the steps, I know the slogans etc, and I have stories about how I overcame stuff thirty years ago. But I'm a newbie. The truth is I'm afraid to be vulnerable. I don't trust. I act li...	blueskies18	9	1196	Mar 2, 2018 by Tude
	Higher Power at Work.... (Preview) A person I have made up my mind to contact and make an amends to for something I selfishly did years ago which might have been very dangerous answered a FB request from me this morning. I had time to think my plan over and was in the process of taking control and at the keyboard of my computer when my wife w...	Jerry F	6	615	Mar 2, 2018 by Iamhere
	Lost and lonely.. (Preview) Hi everyone, Iâm really struggling right now mentally trying to deal with my AH. His denial runs very, very deep which exhausts me to no end. Now to add to the matter, he is under a ton of stress in regards to life, finances, our marriage, his broken ties with his family. Heâs been snapping out of nowhere...	Elabella	28	840	Mar 1, 2018 by Elabella
	fighting negativity (Preview) I just want to be positive today * stay out of self-pity I also want to stay out of my head.	Hoot Nanny	2	2239	Mar 1, 2018 by Iamhere
	growl (Preview) Oh my! My mother is starting something again. Over & over. I am beginning to think that she doesn't live me or is capable of loving me anymore. I have taken so many emotional beatings in the last few years. I know she is sick but do I have to be dragged along w her? Some ESH us needed. I am desperate.	Hoot Nanny	4	2260	Mar 1, 2018 by _bunny_
	Courage to Change 3/1/18 (Preview) Good morning MIP. Today's reading is about knowledge and how what we know might change as we embrace recovery. Knowledge is helpful to look at the past for information about ourselves. We can learn a ton from inventories, memories, and reasoning things out with others. Yet - waiting for insight...	Iamhere	6	920	Mar 1, 2018 by Aline
	Step 3 (Preview) Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery together! Step 3 has been posted to the Step Work Board here is the link: http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t64420142/alano...	hotrod	1	547	Mar 1, 2018 by Iamhere
	MORE searching fearless and moral... (Preview) This is an attachment and continuation to a post from days ago regarding my 4th stepping. I got reminded that often times when I think I am done my Higher Power has issues and evidences I need to take a closer look at and I was cued at my morning meeting that this was again the case. While others were sha...	Jerry F	8	907	Feb 28, 2018 by Jerry F
	Courage to Change February 28 (Preview) Hello MIP! Today's reading in courage to change is about the third step, turning our wills and lives over to the care of a higher power. The author shares that at first, they turned over only the really big problems, things about which the author had no choice and clearly no ability to control or impro...	Skorpi	6	583	Feb 28, 2018 by Aline
	God's Sense of Humor (Preview) God has such a wry sense of humor. The word I pulled from my god box today was Action. I had planned to attend my home group(different fellowship) tonight because it's a birthday meeting. So, I figured I'd listen to the speaker tonight and see how he or she takes action in his or her program. Just before th...	Wolfie55	1	1026	Feb 28, 2018 by Iamhere
	Expectations (Preview) The word God gave me today is Expectations. In my experience, they are premeditated resentments. I place expectations on the people around me to act a certain way or do a certain thing and of course I don't tell them. I just expect them to know their role. They, being human, do not live up to my expectatio...	Wolfie55	10	669	Feb 27, 2018 by Bo
	ODAT Reading 2-27-2018 (Preview) The ODAT reading February 27 speaks about attaining a new point of view. The reading suggests that if we listen attentively enough at meetings, read Al-Anon literature with concentration, we will absorb a new point of view. It points out that when we enter program we are always asking "why does he...	hotrod	6	924	Feb 27, 2018 by Enigmatic
	Need some ESH-Wisdom... I know I am not perfect (Preview) Hello Everyone! I am struggling a bit today. After spending a WONDERFUL weekend with my RAH on a mini vacation, we really had some time to connect. My Hubby is no doubt got a LOT on his plate these days with work stress, family drama (mainly his side of the family), and I know he is very concerned with try...	PeacefulLove	4	840	Feb 27, 2018 by Lyne
	been upset but climbing out! (Preview) So much has gotten me upset lately & I held some of it in an exploded! I am working my program to climb out of it. I don't need to lose it like I never walked into the doors of alanon. I don't remember the last time I got this upset so I think that might be a good thing! Bless you all for putting up w my ranting...	Hoot Nanny	5	885	Feb 27, 2018 by Aline
	Mobile Maniac (Preview) Uh-oh. I can access this site with my phone. I could become addicted to miracles in progress. Little play on words. I suppose there are worse things to be addicted to.	Wolfie55	4	617	Feb 26, 2018 by Hoot Nanny
	C2C, 2/26 (Preview) Mistakes and shame: The reading talks about the fact that we all make mistakes, and we can learn from those we've made. We can make amends, and change our behavior and attitudes. The writer further says that the biggest obstacle about learning this process is shame. Shame prevents us from knowin...	Lyne	8	953	Feb 26, 2018 by Lil99
	Trying to escape an alcohlic, I really need some help (Preview) I'm 24 years old and I would love for someone who has left a rough relationship with an alcoholic to private message me. I feel absolutely lost and I really need to talk to someone. Please	aabbcc1	4	866	Feb 26, 2018 by Iamhere
	Sponsorship (Preview) Does Al-Anon take a stance on co-sponsorship? I have 20 years in program and do not feel I need guidance to do step work. I do need a trusted friend to share my recovery and process some step 10 work from time to time. I would like someone to share experiences with step 11 and 12.	Katy F	8	621	Feb 25, 2018 by Jerry F
	I actually did it (Preview) I have been going through this in my head for months now and finally did it last night...I told my husband that he was going to have to move out if the drinking did not stop. I have never actually said those words before and it was the hardest thing I have had to do. The only problem is that he told me I am being a...	lilkbbk	13	811	Feb 25, 2018 by Wolfie55
	Gratitude (Preview) Yesterday morning, right after I read the reading from ODAAT, I reached into my god-box and pulled out the word Gratitude. I remember reading somewhere, in one of the fellowships I am in, that gratitude is not about having everything I want, but wanting everything I have. Coincidentally, my wife and...	Wolfie55	8	2406	Feb 25, 2018 by bud
	update - husband in rehab getting on with life (Preview) Hi there, I am grateful to say that after how ever many months of feeling like whenever I shared I was updating on the next installment in some kind of protracted soap opera, I don't have much to update practically speaking. I am still living with my mother. It has all kinds of unique challenges. I miss...	AnnieFenk321	3	577	Feb 25, 2018 by bud
	Slogans (Preview) Hi. How are ya? I stopped by the conference on the way to work this morning. There were several meetings going on at once. I chose one on Alanon slogans. It was pretty good. I didn't share. I chose to Listen, but one that kept coming up was How Important Is It. I like that one. Be interested to hear any though...	Wolfie55	9	772	Feb 25, 2018 by Wolfie55
	Hope for Today Feb 25 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about our slogan Let It Begin With Me. The writer interprets it as the message of al-anon we may carry to others in need, and that if asked we might share our experience in the program but that does not include an expectation of a response or how it may be received...	yanksfan51	3	531	Feb 25, 2018 by DavidG
	CTC 02/24/18 (Preview) Today's reading suggests that we focus our attention on looking inward to search out the negative defects that exist and harm our decision making process. It points out that a 4th Step inventory need not be painful but a brief look within to see why we do what we do and say what we say. It is important t...	lookingup	3	928	Feb 25, 2018 by Iamhere
	Hello...new here (Preview) Hi everyone, so happy to have found this board, Hopefully the 3rd time will be the charm with trying to post my introduction! So here is my story, as brief as possible. My husband and I married young, basically right out of high-school, (hindsight, not a great idea) shortly after my husband started dri...	Finding grace	12	647	Feb 25, 2018 by Finding grace
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.