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Ugh.
(Preview)
I cut contact with my A biol father when my daughter was a baby, and with very good reasons. It was necessary to stay out of contact with all of that side of the family and that's mostly a good thing as they are unfortunately pretty messed up on the whole and crime, drugs and drama were just normal to all. So i...
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missmeliss
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2
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543
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My life had become unmanageable
(Preview)
My AH is trying all the time to blame me. He says I throw away his documents, clothes and valuables. Before Al-Anon I believed him, and tried to remember if I have not thrown in the trash his stuff.One day he told me that I threw in the trash his shirts, and I believed him. I bought him two new shirts. And the...
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salvie
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8
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705
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Introducing myself
(Preview)
Hello, I often come to the boards and read as a guest, but after 4 years I thought why have I not joined..... Anyway glad to be here and apart of today! I was raised in an alcoholic home, married to an alcoholic who is now in recovery. I have dabbled in alanon for about 4 year, but started working a honest prog...
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Katisfreetoday
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7
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437
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Hope in Myself
(Preview)
I had a very bad day, but I picked up the phone and called my beloved alnon friends, who helped me come back to reality to change my attitude. Here I have been hoping for my AA dh who stopped drinking since December but I found him today in the parking lot at lunchtime drinking. it was a God moment for me to pla...
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Cottonjeans
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4
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619
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Need ESH, How to Cope
(Preview)
So ABF and I doing ok. He is working on him, I am working on me. Things have been going well. I'm at work right now. He typically texts me throughout the day. In the past, I have always known if he relapsed because all texts and communications stop. I have associated a lack of communication with him to be &qu...
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kspec85
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4
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517
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What works for you
(Preview)
i thought I would ask you all what helps you get through that bad moment or to change your attitude. I need an alnon meeting. My AA uprooted me to a new state with no friends and I feel so isolated which doesn't feel good. Especially when all I have is the AA for company. i am so angry because he is drinking aga...
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Cottonjeans
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3
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416
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I feel LOST!
(Preview)
I recently was in a relationship with a man I love. We had one argument one evening, while both of us were intoxicated. I said some ugly things that were very hurtful, however, my intoxication level was a lot higher as opposed to his. He has been drinking for quite a while now, and so His consumption do...
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cherrin872
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11
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522
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the difference between knowing and accepting
(Preview)
Hey guys. I popped in a few weeks ago or more, and then have been kind of MIA -- still feel kind of weird about talking about this stuff. But, since then I have left to stay at my dad's. My husband has been "dry" and talking about how he may drink in the future -- of course, at this point, he's try...
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rt
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10
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768
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Met someone...no red flags...but he is an alcoholic
(Preview)
Greetings beautiful people. I have been away for a while. Busy with life and happiness for a change. I am happy to say that I have filed for divorce (final in june). (nothing was changing and I was verbally abused.) I have taken back control of my life, and even moved. Following where I am being led. I re...
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sadsusie
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9
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1079
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Got my inventory taken....
(Preview)
gave it to my Higher Power. Aloha Family just got back from the post op meeting at the Medical Center on Oahu and then stay several more days with a calabash sister (calabash means very close friend from the past) and we had a great time doing catch up with each other which included my present wife. M...
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Jerry F
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4
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517
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Thanks for nothing, Wednesday.
(Preview)
Well, for a start my grandmother isn't speaking to me.....last night she articulated one of her extremely forceful political opinions, and in my usual style I said "Fair enough, perhaps that's right" but on this occasion she wasn't content with that and she demanded to know "Why, w...
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missmeliss
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5
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647
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Being in relationship with a man who works his AA program showing me I have work to do.....
(Preview)
My story is this: My alcoholic husband took his life 5 years ago. I went to Al Anon in the 2 years before his death and also afterward. I am now 6 months into a relationship with a man who is almost 9 years sober and works his AA program faithfully. I am discovering how much work I still need to do with my ow...
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Maine Girl
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3
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315
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resentment
(Preview)
Hi all, very new to al-anon. Question to ask, does anyone carry around resentment and if so how do they deal with it? It consumes me sometimes and although after a couple of hours I'll start reading my literature and feel better it takes me the couple of hours to turn to my literature. Will I always feel li...
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Erry
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7
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1007
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Struggling with Step3
(Preview)
I sat and worked with my sponsor last night on Step 3. This one is hard for me. I get the whole frog on the lilly pad thing and that making the decision is only the first step that I have to JUMP too... (from Paths to recovery) I can't got that He can (got that) LET HIM this one is hard for me... ...
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ladybugnessa
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9
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470
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Posting on AA board?
(Preview)
Occasionally I see a post on the AA board to which I would like to offer e/s/h. Is that permitted? If so, am I able to use my al anon MIP screen name and password to log in over there? Thanks
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Irish7
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2
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452
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I have come to the conclusion
(Preview)
I think I probably have known this for a while but after giving it quite a bit thought I have come to the conclusion that I have lost respect for my husband. We have been together for 38 years with the drinking 10+ years. We have both changed dramatically over those 10 years and it has been hard. I find my...
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Jen61
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9
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615
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C2C 4-29
(Preview)
The Courage to Change reading for April 29 speaks about holding onto guilt and shame. It points out that many members have grown up in an alcoholic home, and because of this are very familiar with harsh criticism and constant fear. We tend to react with guilt and exaggerate the significance of any e...
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hotrod
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5
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355
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Lack of self esteem
(Preview)
As I dig deep into my emotions I notice a constant fear driving a lot of my actions. I feel like I'm not worthy. I feel that I can get involved with recovery for myself and my wife will end up finding someone else. It scares me. What I really want id a healthy partner to spend my life with. I want my wife to be tha...
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Hillyard
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10
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930
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My stomach is in knots
(Preview)
Lots of anxiety over here. I feel like I'm constantly in fight or flight mode. Does anyone else deal with this? My wife f bombed me and I told her not to and that I don't like that language. Then she told me she didn't say it. What???? I'm in the twilight zone. Am I going crazy?
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Hillyard
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12
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973
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ODAT 4-30
(Preview)
The ODA T reading for April 30 is a very powerful reflection on the word "selfishness". The reading points out that this word is often maligned and frowned upon and that we must look up at this in a different light. I know that I always thought that I was unselfish and giving until Al-Anon as...
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hotrod
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0
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281
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Turned it over to my hp
(Preview)
I just have to share. I am not new to Alanon. I attended some meetings years ago but never have worked the steps. Now my life is unmanageable and I am ready to get to work on myself. Growing up in an alcoholic house, I became a perfectionist. This includes always working a full-time job and a part-ti...
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Complexnatural
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1
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334
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Conflicted about court appearance.
(Preview)
3 months ago my husband drove drunk and flipped the car (with me in it.) His court date is this week. His lawyer asked me to be present at the trial and vouch for his progress and sobriety. When we had that original conversation, I was okay with it. AH had been making progress- using his meetings, spon...
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Bloodshotbetty
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18
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669
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C2C and ODAT thoughts for 4-27
(Preview)
The C2C reading for April 27 speaks about self-esteem and how to attain it. It points out that self-esteem grows when I love and accept myself as I am and that each time I base myr self-worth and what we do or what others think of us, our self-esteem is reduced. If we concentrate on making others happy,...
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hotrod
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4
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441
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AD Continues to Pull at My Heartstrings
(Preview)
This past Monday was my AD and her twin sister's birthdays. My AD joined us at our family Easter Brunch at the beginning of April, and we spoke to each other, though not much. She has a boyfriend now, and he seems to be good for her. She looked good (I hadn't seen her for almost two months). I decided to send h...
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Green Eyes
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10
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656
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ACOA
(Preview)
I am an adult child of 2 alcoholics. They are both still active. I haven't spoken to them in a little over 2 years now. We were pretty close before so it has taken me this long to adjust to our estrangement. I came across some ACOA information through someone on facebook this week that has stirred some thin...
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StargazerLily
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3
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288
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Just me and my baby
(Preview)
I made the geographic change to leave when i was 20 weeks pregnant from AHBF. I quit my job, sold my car, and went to my parents, they were abusive and my mom hurt the baby, then i drove 1000 miles in 3 days when the baby was 4 months old to go to my aunt's house. my aunt didn't tell me that she was with an abusiv...
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abell
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4
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496
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Adult Children of Alcoholics?
(Preview)
I'm wondering if there is a support group online for specifically adult children of alcoholics? Alanon has been great and I want to continue to attend meetings but am looking for extra support. I'm about to go to an alanon meeting with my sister who is working very hard in AA. The support of the alanon...
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kathleen1212
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1
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228
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help me!!!
(Preview)
ah wont sign off on "my" pension leaving me without money to move out. I knew it was a long shot. he wants to keep me prioner here while he is drunk every day and nite. i dont drive, live out in the booneys. im not 25 anymoer,i cant leave with $100 and a few prs of jeans. it is so terribly expensive he...
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YARNCRAZY
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8
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782
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Court
(Preview)
Well, I got through court just fine. I haven't had that kind of anxiety since I originally had XAH served, his last over the top reaction in January really freaked me out. That had so little to do with me and so much to do with his lack of communication .. nothing new there. I had to laugh to myself though...
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SerenityRUS
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3
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501
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New to Al-Anon
(Preview)
Hello, everyone. I'm very new to Al-Anon but I think it's something I'm going to need to be a part of. I have been married for almost 19 years. About 10 years ago my wife began to drink in response to the divorce of her parents. I was drinking at the time too but I eventually slowed down. I still drink but it's...
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Hillyard
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18
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615
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how can I be free of this?
(Preview)
Hi allThis is the first post I am making on here and I am very new to Al Anon.I have been reading some of the posts and am wondering if my situation is relevant.A little bit of back story might be useful, but I must say I have never written any of this down or even vocalized the situation in a way that was comple...
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purav
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13
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678
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Baltimore
(Preview)
Just out of concern for any in the fellowship of Al-Anon and MIP.... please be extra careful and of course anyone else on the rim of danger. ((((Hugs))))
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Jerry F
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5
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2017
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Aloha Kwrocks
(Preview)
And welcome to the board. You checked in on Hillyard's post and asked how does one work step 1. Lots of family's gonna stop by and offer their experience on the question also and for me working Step one meant realizing that the problem was alcohol and drug addiction and that everything I had wished o...
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Jerry F
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1
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399
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How do you keep the anger and resentment at bay?
(Preview)
Got home last night from work only to see that my husband had been drinking. Of course he denied it but that only made me more pissed as I want him to know that I am no longer ignoring it and wanted to call him out on it. I know I shouldn't be doing this but I just couldn't help myself. I am still pissed today a...
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Jazzie18
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13
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876
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Talked to Ex
(Preview)
Talked to my ex A today and I been talking to him daily I should say , since we been divorced we get along better and have more respect for each other's recovery , again I wish I didn't divorce him I just wish he would of given me my space to work on me and get healthy but I guess sometimes a divorce is needed . Wel...
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Wisdom67
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3
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513
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Husband in recovery just relapsed. Now what?
(Preview)
I'm new to both this forum and Al-Anon. I have been married to an alcoholic for 14 years. We have two children, 18 and 10. His drinking had become so traumatic I insisted he go to rehab or move out last October. He was in rehab for over a month, then sober for nearly 6 months before he relapsed. That was...
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Steffa
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15
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845
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New to group & Mom is Alcoholic
(Preview)
I've read a lot of threads & can relate some to my situation but I'm looking for guidance . My Mom is 72 year old active alcoholic with cirrohhis who has tried to get sober via AA but it doesn't last. I have one sibling who lives 3 states away & pretty much has nothing to do with her. My husbands job br...
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Fullcup
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11
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662
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Encouragement needed
(Preview)
I went to my first al-anon meeting yesterday. My AH thinks it was a support group for parents of special needs children. When I came home he asked how it went. I told him how much I liked it and how I wanted to start going every Sunday and Monday. He was totally on board, at first. Then he responded, what abou...
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vlia1029
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5
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386
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Started feeling overwhelmed, so here I am!
(Preview)
My intention for today was to be gentle with myself. Then, I went to work and got to deal with a few issues, went to my intake appointment with a counselor who was really pushing me to do and commit to more than I felt I was able to do, got back to work and helped clean out the kitchen, returned to my office to...
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Skorpi
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5
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543
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Al Anon widow of alcoholic
(Preview)
Been away from Al anon a long time; now I'm back. My life has become unmanageable. My alcoholic husband who was in recovery died of cancer 3.5 years ago and I am lost. I am back to find myself as I feel as though I was buried along with my husband.
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mobius
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14
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3532
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resentful
(Preview)
It's been a while since I've been on the board or to a meeting and need to get to one asap. It's also been about 6 months since AH and I have lived together. I have already grown so far apart from him especially with all the recent events. But still I can't let him go and I don't know what I'm holding to. A couple...
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4myboys
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10
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2358
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Hope For Today Apr 28
(Preview)
Morning Everyone: Today's reading in Hope for Today is about the difference between Step 11, to pray "only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out" and the praying for God to allow our own wants and what we think we need, through OUR will, to be carried out. This is a gr...
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yanksfan51
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2
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272
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stinking thinking
(Preview)
Well it's been almost a month since the kids and I moved out. in so many ways it's better living on my own than with AH and I don't regret the choice BUT he hasn't said a word to me about anything besides when he sees the kids. No I miss you, I wish you'd move back, nothing. Like he could care less, just as long a...
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Kerrymom
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3
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680
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New to Al-Anon, not to alcoholism
(Preview)
I live in a very urban area so I have no excuse for not finding a face to face meeting, but I'm a little lost as to which one I should start with, as they often have different "titles". My son is 24 and an alcoholic. He just finished a 30-day program for the 2nd time in his life and is entering a 90-da...
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aymees
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9
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543
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new and scared
(Preview)
I havent got any guidebooks or found any meetings yet and really want to understand what the steps are and the ideas surrounding them so i can quit being angry. I know sometimes i get angry because if i dont i will break down and cry and i just dont have the time! I also care for my aging mother who is also drug...
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kelllkelll
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8
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557
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Meth
(Preview)
I have a young cousin. She is the prettiest, funniest, most adorable person that ever walked the earth. She is also about 12 years younger than me and a super-smart-ass. Did I mention gorgeous. She sent me a message tonight, to tell me she feels angry, I am the only person in the family she trusts, she is a...
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missmeliss
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13
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1104
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What books?!
(Preview)
Laurabobaura mentioned picking up books off her shelf can someone help me by telling me what books i should start with, can get from library, or when i can afford or find a meeting. I am dealing with meth and heroin addicted daughter, with a child, and an aging, addicted mother. Thank you.
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kelllkelll
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7
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560
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I can only ever start from now.
(Preview)
I saw this little parable today and it really spoke to me. It was just posted anon on facebook so I can't quote a source. "One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well. The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do. Finally, he decided the animal was old, and the we...
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missmeliss
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4
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615
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ODAT Reading 4-26
(Preview)
The ODAT reading for today, April 26, asks the question:' What do I want. Al-Anon to do for me?". It points out that this program is a powerful tool for those of us who are brave enough to acknowledge our faults with courage and honesty. Al-Anon ask us to look at our good and bad qualities so that we ca...
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hotrod
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4
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493
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Upcoming divorce
(Preview)
Divorce depression, grief, recovery and trauma are putting me on edge and i am not feeling very centered or emotionally stable. I will get thru this, only three more weeks before the divorce. God is holding my hand. May15 th is the court date we still have no financial agreement and might need the judg...
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Mirandac
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14
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634
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Tradition 7
(Preview)
http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t60093481/alanon-tradition-7/
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hotrod
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0
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724
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I could be wrong.....
(Preview)
I was looking at pinkchip's profile, was gonna ask if the parrot was his and glanced at his whiteboard messages, then over to Jerry's whiteboard to see what else was written on the subject of saying "maybe I'm wrong". Interesting, and something I'm not very good at, considering that my tak...
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likemyheart
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4
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488
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Tiny beautiful things.
(Preview)
I have a friend that lives in America that I met via an al-anon type group on the internet and we have become pretty close, "soul sisters" we say. Just before, as I sat in my room in the middle of the night huddled by my heater, she told me it is morning over there and she is going outside to plant su...
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missmeliss
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6
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468
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Accepting the things I cannot change...
(Preview)
I can see the progress in myself thanks to this program tonight. One year ago my step daughter revealed she had bee cutting herself. Arms, legs - her beautiful 14 yo baby skin scabbed over from self harm. I immediately got into "fixer" mode. AH is her father, and without tools, verbiage...
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LedfootJenny
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9
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654
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ODAT Reading 4-25
(Preview)
The O D A T reading for April 25 speaks about alcoholism being a disease and only the alcoholic can set himself free from this compulsion. It validates the point that we non alcoholics enter Al-Anon, believing that we should be able to correct the situation that is causing us so much suffering. We fi...
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hotrod
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3
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461
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Just saying hi
(Preview)
Good morning--I'm new here, altho not new to Alanon. I've been active in an online alcoholism/addiction forum for over 2 years and am endlessly grateful for the ES&H I've been privileged to receive there. Recently the site underwent a revision and now has a very commercial feel to it. There a...
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honeypig
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10
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603
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Good News ... Not so good News
(Preview)
Work is going well ... Finally pushing through our two year project. My mom is staying with us. My son is excited to have grandma with us. She has been helping a great deal and it is appreciated. I have made it to the gym and my house is just about fixed.
The not so good news ex-A quit paying child support. I...
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Truth
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2
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486
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Anxiety
(Preview)
I'm having some anxiety issues there is something to be said about not knowing how you feel about something .. lol. I didn't know it was anxiety and I was ok with that. Now I'm having nausea in the AM and waking up in the middle of the night. I have had a couple of nightmares. Needless to say I have court c...
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SerenityRUS
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9
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2343
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It works...it really works!
(Preview)
I might be a little more hard-headed than most, I'm not sure. I have been taking steps forward and then backwards, totally on the merry go round of craziness that is living with a very active A. (the getting disappointed time and time again, getting angry at the lack of caring, the sneaking around, the b...
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Fairlee
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5
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480
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What have you done for you lately?
(Preview)
Today I am planning on meeting a couple girlfriends for breakfast then we will walk our dogs as long as the rain holds off. I don't get many lazy days off and well I am going to enjoy it, but when I get back I have plenty of homework and studying to get at, but I find if I fit in the things I love to do I am more prod...
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Breakingfree
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14
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526
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