Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

nmike · nmike

Well, I hate to count it down but my recovering A husband who doesn't want to be in this relationship after 31 years is moving out June 1st. In the mean time, our youngest is graduating from high school. We have no plan except his and that is "I am taking my clothes and I don't want to have anything to do with y...

wille · wille

howdy do to all, I hope its great ur ways! Josh woke up from his coma. He does not know anyone, except he woke up after being taken off life support, then coding and being put back on life support. He woke up - those of ya seeing this post for the first time, he was in an accident where...

teddybear · teddybear

"Anticipating enjoyment is a good way to begin my day. If I lose my place, I'll remember I can start my day over at any time." This is something that I needed to read today. I know that my day will be better than it began!!

I decided to post this, because it may be helpful to someone els...

Jeannie · Jeannie

I just found out this morning that one of my husbands drinking buddies was attacked this weekend. Up until a year ago my husband spent most nights at this bar in a really seedy part of time. I gave him an ultimatum that I could no longer live with it and we could not afford it. If he continued going there I t...

nycbt · nycbt

On Wednesday my husband is going to go for a physical with the post office which means he problary got the job. I know some of you think that is great that he has a job in the post office and he will have good benifts and a retirement plan and so on. With me it means that things are going to change in my life, he is...

Powerless · Powerless

You are absolutely right in your post to me yesterday. Thank You for the advice. I don't want to do something that I will regret. A good friend at work warned me that I shouldn't make any decisions right now. He said that people may take advantage because I am vulnerable and th...

Michelle77 · Michelle77

Hi, I'm wondering if I can join this board. I'm not actively involved with an alcoholic. My grandfather was an alcoholic. My mother's father. He lived with us for a few years when I was a child. I recently just found out he was an alcoholic. Neither one...

dot · dot

Hi - you didn't do anything wrong on the Step Board. I just figured out what happened - I hit the wrong button and it closed your post. Sorry!!!!! Love and hugs - Dot

haximon · haximon

I will be out of town from 25 May to 30 May over the weekend of my mother's 75th birthday; I will try to log in when I can. I will need prayers as wel as I am going to try to get my aunt to refund some of the parental support money that was taken from me years ago. My fate will be decided soon and I need all the help I ca...

Powerless · Powerless

I have been doing so much thinking over the past couple of months. I have realized that I am not mentally in a position to make any decisions. I have not made good decisions in such a long time. All of my decisions seem to have an ulterior motive. I don't know how to make sound jud...

Powerless · Powerless

Yeesterday hubby tried to pick a fight. I ended up calling ther police who escorted him off the property. The officer informed me that I cannot take out a restraining order because hubby knows where to draw the line. I also cannot get him out of the house until I pay an attorney.&nbs...

whitie · whitie

Ive been contemplating leaving my marriage of 22 years for some time now. I finally decided that I am leaving. My son leaves for college in the fall and I plan to leave sometime after that. I have only told three people about this. So when my sister in law called friday night and said that my brother told he...

so lost · so lost

Hi everyone, I am new here and not even sure how this a works. A friend of mine suggested Alanon would help me. I have a close friend who is destroying himself with alcohol. His life is totally chaos and it hurts me to see all this and not be able to help. He drives me craz ye...

richard · richard

I am bored out of my mind this afternoon. I finally figured I would ride my trail bike up to a coffee shop that is a bit further away than the usual one that I go to. My son called, asked if I would be home. I said I was going out as if I had an important place to go. I have a feeling, residue feeling of being drained...

nikkilou · nikkilou

Just wondering when do things get better. My A stopped drinking 100 days ago. Before I was alone because he was allways drunk. Know I'm Alone because he is allways at meeting. I know I should not complain but I have three kids all under Five A little help would be nice. I...

mariposa · mariposa

Hello everyone. I just found this message board a few minutes ago. I signed up for two listserv style groups the other day, but noticed that most of the postings in those are related to meetings and have topics. I don't have the alanon books yet (I ordered them the other day), so I don't re...

jj · jj

This might be long not sure... Went to SIL's house just one of thoes feelings brought her one of our special treat coffee's... Well her hubby (just out of rehab) was on a rampage.... wont get into it... Helpped her just by being there. So any how it was time to get home and get the kiddies to bed a...

babs · babs

I’ve let this disease that belongs to another consume me Accepting impending doom; till I could no longer see I have fed it, fought it, and let it lead I have forgotten who I am, & what it is I need I’ve chosen an endless path with no light I’ve given it my all from day to night I am not winnin...

sanddie · sanddie

It isn't until we realize that we are NEVER alone, despite NOBODY being around that we can truly heal and overcome our circumstances, situations and start a new direction in our life. I remember the days I felt so alone, but now looking back, I realize I wasn't alone, especially because my children w...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

"Do not search for God's(HP's) will. Search for God(HP). Finding God (HP) is all we need to do. --(not sure which minister I scribbled this down from.)* *Neat thought, Find God/HP, the rest will come!

luv123 · luv123

Hi everyone--just some thoughts from the meeting earlier and my week: I have an attitude of gratitude for my hp today. He has been patient with me while I have been in a process of stepping away from Him in a state of doubt and spiritual confusion. Several things happened last week : including dea...

abbyal · abbyal

Hi , I have a friend traveling to Virginia Beach in June , she has committed to voluntering at the World Service Office and is trying to find accomadations close by. If anyone knows of a good bed an breakfast or reasonable hotel in the vacinity it would be greatly appreciated. Thanks Louise&nb...

confusedmom · confusedmom

How do you know when enough is enough? My husband and I are coming up on our 10th anniversary. We have a wonderful 3-year-old son. We have a nice house and new cars. My husband is obsessed with "keeping up" What he doesn't realize is that his drinking is about to shatter all of these "dreams" I d...

lil_feathered_one · lil_feathered_one

Today is a new day. I will not let my feelings get the best of me today. I am feeling better today a little bit. When hubby was late getting home from work last night the knots in my stomach started and those thoughts of "well I know what he will be like when he does get in" started. I must say I was suprised to fi...

lkmason · lkmason

Hi, my husband is an alcoholic and a user. He just finished a 3 week outpatient program last week. He feels like his biggest problem was his cocaine use. He thinks that he has a handle on it, and that a beer every now and then will be okay. He has been saying that if h...

confusedmom · confusedmom

Tonight I came home and dinner was cooking, yard work had been done, there was no drinking . . We had a good night and everyone was able to laugh. The sad part is that these nights are almost as hard as the drinking nights, sometimes. It makes me realize how good we can be and makes me wonder why so ma...

jj · jj

Well all the ultra sound tests came back clear and the cyst that I knew about is not growing but I have "several" small cysts that I was unaware of that have developed in the last 6 months. So it was good news I guess! My body is just having trouble adjusting. So I was glad that I didn't really...

jj · jj

I posted a while ago that my SIL wanted to have a talk to my AH about things that she has noticed in him and that she is concerned about his health. Well she had her talk with him and she thought he really listened to her which sounded good. He may have very well taken her talk to heart but has done...

Jeannie · Jeannie

Well we had another trip to the counselor and scheduled another one for next week. My husband said he has not had a drink since last Thursday when we last went. I do believe him as he looked better than he has and was obviously not drinking tonight. He also said he had been to 2 AA meetings. He did have hi...

Phil · Phil

What is patience? Patience is the ability to: Sit back and wait for an expected outcome without experiencing anxiety, tension, or frustration. Let go of your need for immediate gratification. Display tolerance, compassion, understanding, and acceptance toward those who are sl...

GirlSkates · GirlSkates

I am busy reminding myself that "I am powerless over my husband's alchohol". It's a new mantra...trying to get used to it. He called from the road last night (he travels for work often) and I caught a hint of it in his mood,...and his tone. I know the sound...I suppose we all do. So the...

nycbt · nycbt

I have a problem with my self-esteem. Before Alanon I would have a very hard time dealing with changes. I am trying to do alittle better with that. My husband has gotten his license and is now driving my car which is good, but I have less control over him. I know that is why I get upset when he takes the car....

Phil · Phil

What is insecurity? Insecurity is: Feeling of not being ``good enough'' to meet the challenge of a situation you face in life. Sense of helplessness in the face of problems, conflict, or concerns. Belief that one is inadequate or incompetent to handle life's challenges. Fear of b...

jj · jj

I have all 12 steps posted below, please keep in mind that I found this in naranon but it is the same program, just replacing addict with alcoholic. Addiction is addiction. This has helpped me out with working my program and I hope it helps others here. JJ Step One We admitted we were...

Powerless · Powerless

I am feeling so frustrated and angry today. The therapist came again on Friday and husband claimed to be clean for two weeks. I guess he forgot about the week he smoked last weekend and this week. Today I counted my Klonopin (My doctor gives them to me to sleep) and noticed that four a...

lil_feathered_one · lil_feathered_one

Well I talked to a counsler yesterday and she gave me a number for husband that he could call and make an appointment to be seen and she gave me some good guidence on how to approach him with it. That is what I did today. I couldn't hold my feelings any longer on how his drinking affects me.(although I know I s...

Trish · Trish

I have been in a al anon program for 13 months and I have been helping my a with going to meeting all. Now I think that it is time for me to start working the program for me. In my area there is one meeting a week and I don't feel right in there so that is why I look online for a meeting room. I have been told to work th...

cdb · cdb

Hello friends, I am still out of town helping my parents. I plan to stay with them longer to help them get settled into their cabin too in Canada. We plan to leave to Canada on Thursday. I am not sure if I will have a computer to use there yet or not but will sure come online if I find one to use. This visit has b...

Lanchas · Lanchas

I am working on the 12 steps. I need help with them. Is someone willing to hlep me? Lanchas

angel123 · angel123

Step One: RELAX-> I don't have to be in charge or in control anymore. It's going to be okay. Step Two: RELAX-> I can simply believe that somone stronger than I can restore me to health and wholeness. Step Three: RELAX-> I can easily turn my whole life and well-being over to God, as I understan...

Belongtome · Belongtome

My A has one year sobriety under his belt...and I must say I'm no longer afraid of the physical contact, but it's been a rough year verbally. This past year I opened a retail shop, and that's been my salvation...some time to myself. Since I'm inside all day, yesterday I started going to a tannin...

teddybear · teddybear

Hi, If I am feeling angry, I do not have to take my anger out on others in a destructive way, and I do not have the right. If my usual response is to scream, sulk or to lash out with cruel words, today I can find a new solution of what works for me when I get mad. I can start to see new ways to handle m...

GirlSkates · GirlSkates

hi all - my first post. My first al-anon meeting last night. And I keep thinking, "maybe I am blowing this out of porportion, maybe I am wrong...mabye I really dont need this" I don't think that is the case. I don't know anymore.

jessi · jessi

Hi all, I need your prayers and love like never before. I find myself in a position in which a former crush of mine and a current attraction of mine have decided to hook up. Both have expressed a willingness to not even pursue anything if it means losing my friendship. I feel completely...

Powerless · Powerless

You are wonderfully wonderful. I have felt so welcome and you having a calming effect onme. You all have opened my eyes and helped me to believe that the desire I feel to change is not for nothing. Believe it or not, the slogans are my favorite. Someone told me last night durin...

megan · megan

I left my husband 12 days ago and am living in a local hotel I like not having to deal with my A's drunken behaviour. I like relaxing and not having the high speed interented cut off on a whim I don't miss living in the insanity at all. My husband: scared sober. He wasn't at first, he drank harder....

lil_feathered_one · lil_feathered_one

I keep asking my self that. Husband keeps saying that he wants/ needs help with his drinking, but hasn't took that step to do so. Meanwhile I'm here still dealing with his drinking. My anger is building and my sadness when I look at him I'm finding more difficult to control. I can't help but feel like I nee...

Newbee · Newbee

I was shocked when I told my A sister that I went to Alanon and she was so mad at me! She has admitted to being an A and has gone to 2 AA meetings and was sober for about 2 weeks, but then went back to it and had a bad drunk in front of her kids and friends, etc and is now very upset, ashamed, etc....

Phil · Phil

We often use the expression "good self-esteem, "poor" self-esteem or "no" self-esteem. How does one "esteem" the self and what is the self anyway? Esteem involves loving respect and dignified caring. What of the self? We come into the world with it; it follows us through life like a shadow. If we lose...

nal · nal

Hi, Today I'm feeling a little sad, and I have that familiar knot in my stomach. My dad is my A (alcohol and pills), he has been attending AA daily for about eighteen months and as far as I know has been sober. My mother is a codependent without a program. Last night she was tel...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

"When one door of happiness closes, another one opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us." --Helen Keller

Samena · Samena

Hi everyone, I left my marriage of 10 years to an A last year and I am finding it very difficult to trust another person. I am always questioning their motives and their whereabouts, that it is just driving me insane. So much so, that I am having nightmares of being betrayed again!&n...

AngelBearPoet · AngelBearPoet

I am sorry to say I will not be able to chair the meeting.. The place where I meet for my F2F will be painting the room we meet in.. I am on the paint commity for this.. We will be meeting up there early and painting all morning till the 2pm F2F meeting starts.. Them meeting in another room for that and then pain...

Jeannie · Jeannie

Hi, Phil posted this on the AA board and I found it very interesting. I hope he doesn't mind but I copied it here. THE RELATIONSHIP DUET The Dance of Intimacy By Darlene Lancer, M.A., MFT The relationship duet the dance of intimacy that all couples do. If one partner moves in, the other...

mastiff · mastiff

Hi all, I find myself reciting the closing prayer like I use to say the pledge of allegence when i was a kid in school. It becomes a ritual and I loose the meaning of the words, and just say the words. I have found that a new twist on the same words can help me to bring that meaning back to them and r...

nycbt · nycbt

Hi Everyone I haven't been on this message board in a long time. I have been going to face to face. I have been talking to my new friends from Alanon. I have learn alot of things. My husband has gotten his license and in the begin I was very upset about the change. I have learn to deal with it better. I have be...

richard · richard

…and my God gently laughed. I have not been here for awhile. I have not been here for two reasons or so I thought. Now it seems there is there has been only one. I have been enjoying the heck out of myself by going to a beautiful State park and riding my trail bike eight very hilly miles around the big beautifu...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

Been reading your posts and I want to thank you for sharing. Yes, my spouse is now back in AA, 4 month sobriety, saw him start to teeter, and wondered if he would stop meetings. He did go to an "open" AA dinner last night, and he then went to a meeting last night. Someone in...

teddybear · teddybear

Hi Everyone, I am feeling sad today, because yesterday I spoke to my oldest son, and he started speaking against my younger son. I told him that we don't throw stones, when we live in a glass house. He was talking against my youngest son, telling me that he was drinking yesterday, that...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

" A racehorse has to run, A bird has to fly, An artist has to paint, A teacher has to teach. There is something in you that you have to do. All that is left to do, do it." --(in closing) from Self Matters, by Dr. Phil McGraw ...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	One week to go (Preview) Well, I hate to count it down but my recovering A husband who doesn't want to be in this relationship after 31 years is moving out June 1st. In the mean time, our youngest is graduating from high school. We have no plan except his and that is "I am taking my clothes and I don't want to have anything to do with y...	nmike	4	837	May 24, 2005 by jessi
	t y 4 Josh prayers (Preview) howdy do to all, I hope its great ur ways! Josh woke up from his coma. He does not know anyone, except he woke up after being taken off life support, then coding and being put back on life support. He woke up - those of ya seeing this post for the first time, he was in an accident where...	wille	3	623	May 24, 2005 by jessi
	Thought for the Day (Preview) "Anticipating enjoyment is a good way to begin my day. If I lose my place, I'll remember I can start my day over at any time." This is something that I needed to read today. I know that my day will be better than it began!! I decided to post this, because it may be helpful to someone els...	teddybear	2	792	May 24, 2005 by jessi
	drinking buddy (Preview) I just found out this morning that one of my husbands drinking buddies was attacked this weekend. Up until a year ago my husband spent most nights at this bar in a really seedy part of time. I gave him an ultimatum that I could no longer live with it and we could not afford it. If he continued going there I t...	Jeannie	3	601	May 24, 2005 by holly123
	ANOTHER CHANGE (Preview) On Wednesday my husband is going to go for a physical with the post office which means he problary got the job. I know some of you think that is great that he has a job in the post office and he will have good benifts and a retirement plan and so on. With me it means that things are going to change in my life, he is...	nycbt	1	734	May 24, 2005 by holly123
	Jeannie (Preview) You are absolutely right in your post to me yesterday. Thank You for the advice. I don't want to do something that I will regret. A good friend at work warned me that I shouldn't make any decisions right now. He said that people may take advantage because I am vulnerable and th...	Powerless	1	594	May 24, 2005 by Jeannie
	Can I join?? (Preview) Hi, I'm wondering if I can join this board. I'm not actively involved with an alcoholic. My grandfather was an alcoholic. My mother's father. He lived with us for a few years when I was a child. I recently just found out he was an alcoholic. Neither one...	Michelle77	4	513	May 24, 2005 by Jeannie
	mariposa (Preview) Hi - you didn't do anything wrong on the Step Board. I just figured out what happened - I hit the wrong button and it closed your post. Sorry!!!!! Love and hugs - Dot	dot	1	725	May 24, 2005 by mariposa
	Vacation (?) notice/prayer request (Preview) I will be out of town from 25 May to 30 May over the weekend of my mother's 75th birthday; I will try to log in when I can. I will need prayers as wel as I am going to try to get my aunt to refund some of the parental support money that was taken from me years ago. My fate will be decided soon and I need all the help I ca...	haximon	13	956	May 23, 2005 by Faith73
	New Realization (Preview) I have been doing so much thinking over the past couple of months. I have realized that I am not mentally in a position to make any decisions. I have not made good decisions in such a long time. All of my decisions seem to have an ulterior motive. I don't know how to make sound jud...	Powerless	3	856	May 23, 2005 by wallsal55
	Police Escort (Preview) Yeesterday hubby tried to pick a fight. I ended up calling ther police who escorted him off the property. The officer informed me that I cannot take out a restraining order because hubby knows where to draw the line. I also cannot get him out of the house until I pay an attorney.&nbs...	Powerless	4	582	May 23, 2005 by confusedmom
	It seemed like a God moment (Preview) Ive been contemplating leaving my marriage of 22 years for some time now. I finally decided that I am leaving. My son leaves for college in the fall and I plan to leave sometime after that. I have only told three people about this. So when my sister in law called friday night and said that my brother told he...	whitie	1	750	May 22, 2005 by sanddie
	so lost (Preview) Hi everyone, I am new here and not even sure how this a works. A friend of mine suggested Alanon would help me. I have a close friend who is destroying himself with alcohol. His life is totally chaos and it hurts me to see all this and not be able to help. He drives me craz ye...	so lost	4	862	May 22, 2005 by so lost
	Me, in relation to my son... (Preview) I am bored out of my mind this afternoon. I finally figured I would ride my trail bike up to a coffee shop that is a bit further away than the usual one that I go to. My son called, asked if I would be home. I said I was going out as if I had an important place to go. I have a feeling, residue feeling of being drained...	richard	3	789	May 22, 2005 by megan
	Alone again (Preview) Just wondering when do things get better. My A stopped drinking 100 days ago. Before I was alone because he was allways drunk. Know I'm Alone because he is allways at meeting. I know I should not complain but I have three kids all under Five A little help would be nice. I...	nikkilou	8	907	May 22, 2005 by Powerless
	New Here (Preview) Hello everyone. I just found this message board a few minutes ago. I signed up for two listserv style groups the other day, but noticed that most of the postings in those are related to meetings and have topics. I don't have the alanon books yet (I ordered them the other day), so I don't re...	mariposa	5	717	May 22, 2005 by mariposa
	VENTING (Preview) This might be long not sure... Went to SIL's house just one of thoes feelings brought her one of our special treat coffee's... Well her hubby (just out of rehab) was on a rampage.... wont get into it... Helpped her just by being there. So any how it was time to get home and get the kiddies to bed a...	jj	2	718	May 22, 2005 by jj
	my path, my choice (Preview) I’ve let this disease that belongs to another consume me Accepting impending doom; till I could no longer see I have fed it, fought it, and let it lead I have forgotten who I am, & what it is I need I’ve chosen an endless path with no light I’ve given it my all from day to night I am not winnin...	babs	8	954	May 22, 2005 by jrtjosey
	NEVER ALONE! (Preview) It isn't until we realize that we are NEVER alone, despite NOBODY being around that we can truly heal and overcome our circumstances, situations and start a new direction in our life. I remember the days I felt so alone, but now looking back, I realize I wasn't alone, especially because my children w...	sanddie	1	683	May 21, 2005 by Shay
	Thought for Today (Preview) "Do not search for God's(HP's) will. Search for God(HP). Finding God (HP) is all we need to do. --(not sure which minister I scribbled this down from.)* *Neat thought, Find God/HP, the rest will come!	wallsal55	0	586	May 21, 2005 by wallsal55
	transcending tuff stuff with HP (Preview) Hi everyone--just some thoughts from the meeting earlier and my week: I have an attitude of gratitude for my hp today. He has been patient with me while I have been in a process of stepping away from Him in a state of doubt and spiritual confusion. Several things happened last week : including dea...	luv123	1	749	May 21, 2005 by cloud
	anyone from Viginia Beach area? (Preview) Hi , I have a friend traveling to Virginia Beach in June , she has committed to voluntering at the World Service Office and is trying to find accomadations close by. If anyone knows of a good bed an breakfast or reasonable hotel in the vacinity it would be greatly appreciated. Thanks Louise&nb...	abbyal	0	680	May 20, 2005 by abbyal
	I don't even know where to start (Preview) How do you know when enough is enough? My husband and I are coming up on our 10th anniversary. We have a wonderful 3-year-old son. We have a nice house and new cars. My husband is obsessed with "keeping up" What he doesn't realize is that his drinking is about to shatter all of these "dreams" I d...	confusedmom	9	1012	May 20, 2005 by cloud
	a new day... (Preview) Today is a new day. I will not let my feelings get the best of me today. I am feeling better today a little bit. When hubby was late getting home from work last night the knots in my stomach started and those thoughts of "well I know what he will be like when he does get in" started. I must say I was suprised to fi...	lil_feathered_one	3	851	May 20, 2005 by she123
	New here! (Preview) Hi, my husband is an alcoholic and a user. He just finished a 3 week outpatient program last week. He feels like his biggest problem was his cocaine use. He thinks that he has a handle on it, and that a beer every now and then will be okay. He has been saying that if h...	lkmason	6	999	May 20, 2005 by lkmason
	Tonight was a good night (Preview) Tonight I came home and dinner was cooking, yard work had been done, there was no drinking . . We had a good night and everyone was able to laugh. The sad part is that these nights are almost as hard as the drinking nights, sometimes. It makes me realize how good we can be and makes me wonder why so ma...	confusedmom	6	818	May 20, 2005 by abbyal
	Just got home from DR (Preview) Well all the ultra sound tests came back clear and the cyst that I knew about is not growing but I have "several" small cysts that I was unaware of that have developed in the last 6 months. So it was good news I guess! My body is just having trouble adjusting. So I was glad that I didn't really...	jj	6	780	May 20, 2005 by jj
	Just a share (Preview) I posted a while ago that my SIL wanted to have a talk to my AH about things that she has noticed in him and that she is concerned about his health. Well she had her talk with him and she thought he really listened to her which sounded good. He may have very well taken her talk to heart but has done...	jj	4	884	May 20, 2005 by jj
	For tonight at least I feel happy (Preview) Well we had another trip to the counselor and scheduled another one for next week. My husband said he has not had a drink since last Thursday when we last went. I do believe him as he looked better than he has and was obviously not drinking tonight. He also said he had been to 2 AA meetings. He did have hi...	Jeannie	8	885	May 20, 2005 by TLC2
	Learning Patience (Preview) What is patience? Patience is the ability to: Sit back and wait for an expected outcome without experiencing anxiety, tension, or frustration. Let go of your need for immediate gratification. Display tolerance, compassion, understanding, and acceptance toward those who are sl...	Phil	0	841	May 20, 2005 by Phil
	IF I had the power.... (Preview) I am busy reminding myself that "I am powerless over my husband's alchohol". It's a new mantra...trying to get used to it. He called from the road last night (he travels for work often) and I caught a hint of it in his mood,...and his tone. I know the sound...I suppose we all do. So the...	GirlSkates	2	854	May 20, 2005 by melanieL
	self-esteem (Preview) I have a problem with my self-esteem. Before Alanon I would have a very hard time dealing with changes. I am trying to do alittle better with that. My husband has gotten his license and is now driving my car which is good, but I have less control over him. I know that is why I get upset when he takes the car....	nycbt	3	826	May 20, 2005 by DanaAngel
	Insecurity (Preview) What is insecurity? Insecurity is: Feeling of not being ``good enough'' to meet the challenge of a situation you face in life. Sense of helplessness in the face of problems, conflict, or concerns. Belief that one is inadequate or incompetent to handle life's challenges. Fear of b...	Phil	3	916	May 20, 2005 by lildee
	12 steps explained (Preview) I have all 12 steps posted below, please keep in mind that I found this in naranon but it is the same program, just replacing addict with alcoholic. Addiction is addiction. This has helpped me out with working my program and I hope it helps others here. JJ Step One We admitted we were...	jj	17	4075	May 20, 2005 by Lanchas
	So frustrated (Preview) I am feeling so frustrated and angry today. The therapist came again on Friday and husband claimed to be clean for two weeks. I guess he forgot about the week he smoked last weekend and this week. Today I counted my Klonopin (My doctor gives them to me to sleep) and noticed that four a...	Powerless	7	1040	May 20, 2005 by honeybunnydog
	unsure and scared (Preview) Well I talked to a counsler yesterday and she gave me a number for husband that he could call and make an appointment to be seen and she gave me some good guidence on how to approach him with it. That is what I did today. I couldn't hold my feelings any longer on how his drinking affects me.(although I know I s...	lil_feathered_one	6	1061	May 20, 2005 by Mark S
	online sponsorship (Preview) I have been in a al anon program for 13 months and I have been helping my a with going to meeting all. Now I think that it is time for me to start working the program for me. In my area there is one meeting a week and I don't feel right in there so that is why I look online for a meeting room. I have been told to work th...	Trish	5	868	May 19, 2005 by DanaAngel
	cdb is still out of town :) (Preview) Hello friends, I am still out of town helping my parents. I plan to stay with them longer to help them get settled into their cabin too in Canada. We plan to leave to Canada on Thursday. I am not sure if I will have a computer to use there yet or not but will sure come online if I find one to use. This visit has b...	cdb	6	802	May 19, 2005 by cloud
	Step Help (Preview) I am working on the 12 steps. I need help with them. Is someone willing to hlep me? Lanchas	Lanchas	6	627	May 19, 2005 by Lanchas
	relax (Preview) Step One: RELAX-> I don't have to be in charge or in control anymore. It's going to be okay. Step Two: RELAX-> I can simply believe that somone stronger than I can restore me to health and wholeness. Step Three: RELAX-> I can easily turn my whole life and well-being over to God, as I understan...	angel123	3	818	May 19, 2005 by nycbt
	Sober is rough too (Preview) My A has one year sobriety under his belt...and I must say I'm no longer afraid of the physical contact, but it's been a rough year verbally. This past year I opened a retail shop, and that's been my salvation...some time to myself. Since I'm inside all day, yesterday I started going to a tannin...	Belongtome	9	1301	May 19, 2005 by nycbt
	Reminder for today (Preview) Hi, If I am feeling angry, I do not have to take my anger out on others in a destructive way, and I do not have the right. If my usual response is to scream, sulk or to lash out with cruel words, today I can find a new solution of what works for me when I get mad. I can start to see new ways to handle m...	teddybear	8	695	May 19, 2005 by nycbt
	surely not (Preview) hi all - my first post. My first al-anon meeting last night. And I keep thinking, "maybe I am blowing this out of porportion, maybe I am wrong...mabye I really dont need this" I don't think that is the case. I don't know anymore.	GirlSkates	12	967	May 19, 2005 by Jeannie
	lost and scared (Preview) Hi all, I need your prayers and love like never before. I find myself in a position in which a former crush of mine and a current attraction of mine have decided to hook up. Both have expressed a willingness to not even pursue anything if it means losing my friendship. I feel completely...	jessi	2	574	May 19, 2005 by Jeannie
	I can't believe all of you... (Preview) You are wonderfully wonderful. I have felt so welcome and you having a calming effect onme. You all have opened my eyes and helped me to believe that the desire I feel to change is not for nothing. Believe it or not, the slogans are my favorite. Someone told me last night durin...	Powerless	2	783	May 19, 2005 by nycbt
	Day 12 Just an update. (Preview) I left my husband 12 days ago and am living in a local hotel I like not having to deal with my A's drunken behaviour. I like relaxing and not having the high speed interented cut off on a whim I don't miss living in the insanity at all. My husband: scared sober. He wasn't at first, he drank harder....	megan	7	973	May 19, 2005 by nycbt
	right thing to do? (Preview) I keep asking my self that. Husband keeps saying that he wants/ needs help with his drinking, but hasn't took that step to do so. Meanwhile I'm here still dealing with his drinking. My anger is building and my sadness when I look at him I'm finding more difficult to control. I can't help but feel like I nee...	lil_feathered_one	5	863	May 19, 2005 by jo4
	"A" mad that I went to Alanon (Preview) I was shocked when I told my A sister that I went to Alanon and she was so mad at me! She has admitted to being an A and has gone to 2 AA meetings and was sober for about 2 weeks, but then went back to it and had a bad drunk in front of her kids and friends, etc and is now very upset, ashamed, etc....	Newbee	11	1116	May 18, 2005 by lin0606
	Self Esteem (Preview) We often use the expression "good self-esteem, "poor" self-esteem or "no" self-esteem. How does one "esteem" the self and what is the self anyway? Esteem involves loving respect and dignified caring. What of the self? We come into the world with it; it follows us through life like a shadow. If we lose...	Phil	0	896	May 18, 2005 by Phil
	Stomach Knot (Preview) Hi, Today I'm feeling a little sad, and I have that familiar knot in my stomach. My dad is my A (alcohol and pills), he has been attending AA daily for about eighteen months and as far as I know has been sober. My mother is a codependent without a program. Last night she was tel...	nal	5	1063	May 18, 2005 by Powerless
	Quote for Today (Preview) "When one door of happiness closes, another one opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us." --Helen Keller	wallsal55	1	635	May 18, 2005 by Belongtome
	Trust? (Preview) Hi everyone, I left my marriage of 10 years to an A last year and I am finding it very difficult to trust another person. I am always questioning their motives and their whereabouts, that it is just driving me insane. So much so, that I am having nightmares of being betrayed again!&n...	Samena	2	877	May 18, 2005 by abbyal
	Saturday May 21,2005 (Preview) I am sorry to say I will not be able to chair the meeting.. The place where I meet for my F2F will be painting the room we meet in.. I am on the paint commity for this.. We will be meeting up there early and painting all morning till the 2pm F2F meeting starts.. Them meeting in another room for that and then pain...	AngelBearPoet	0	707	May 18, 2005 by AngelBearPoet
	From AA board- Relationship Dance (Preview) Hi, Phil posted this on the AA board and I found it very interesting. I hope he doesn't mind but I copied it here. THE RELATIONSHIP DUET The Dance of Intimacy By Darlene Lancer, M.A., MFT The relationship duet the dance of intimacy that all couples do. If one partner moves in, the other...	Jeannie	0	964	May 18, 2005 by Jeannie
	Our Closing Prayer (Preview) Hi all, I find myself reciting the closing prayer like I use to say the pledge of allegence when i was a kid in school. It becomes a ritual and I loose the meaning of the words, and just say the words. I have found that a new twist on the same words can help me to bring that meaning back to them and r...	mastiff	2	4080	May 18, 2005 by luv123
	I HAVE COME A LONG WAY (Preview) Hi Everyone I haven't been on this message board in a long time. I have been going to face to face. I have been talking to my new friends from Alanon. I have learn alot of things. My husband has gotten his license and in the begin I was very upset about the change. I have learn to deal with it better. I have be...	nycbt	4	831	May 18, 2005 by megan
	I told God my plans once... (Preview) …and my God gently laughed. I have not been here for awhile. I have not been here for two reasons or so I thought. Now it seems there is there has been only one. I have been enjoying the heck out of myself by going to a beautiful State park and riding my trail bike eight very hilly miles around the big beautifu...	richard	2	888	May 18, 2005 by Diva
	Jeannie.... (Preview) Been reading your posts and I want to thank you for sharing. Yes, my spouse is now back in AA, 4 month sobriety, saw him start to teeter, and wondered if he would stop meetings. He did go to an "open" AA dinner last night, and he then went to a meeting last night. Someone in...	wallsal55	1	654	May 17, 2005 by Jeannie
	It is never easy (Preview) Hi Everyone, I am feeling sad today, because yesterday I spoke to my oldest son, and he started speaking against my younger son. I told him that we don't throw stones, when we live in a glass house. He was talking against my youngest son, telling me that he was drinking yesterday, that...	teddybear	4	824	May 17, 2005 by teddybear
	Quote for Today (Preview) " A racehorse has to run, A bird has to fly, An artist has to paint, A teacher has to teach. There is something in you that you have to do. All that is left to do, do it." --(in closing) from Self Matters, by Dr. Phil McGraw ...	wallsal55	0	632	May 17, 2005 by wallsal55
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.