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Courage to Change (C2C) 10/14/16
(Preview)
TGIF - Thank Goodness it's Friday! Good morning MIP family. Today's reading in Courage to Change is all about Step 10 and how it helps us continue to grow, learn and change. A line that really speaks to me says, "Much of what I find wrong in my life is related to my opinions -- that is, my prejudices, assu...
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Iamhere
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2
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434
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New here. Daughter of alcoholic, sister of addict. Could use some advice.
(Preview)
Hello everyone, I am really glad I have found this forum. I have found an Al Anon group in my area as well, and I will be attending my first meeting tonight. I am nervous, but ready. My family is in shambles and I know it's time to walk away. I have tried to help in various ways, and everything came to a head a fe...
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sarahGee
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10
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2769
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They say it comes in waves - mom has cancer.
(Preview)
I apologize for the barrage of posts. I mentioned yesterday that my mom was sick & going through tests. My dad just called me (mom still not speaking to me) - Dr says mom has cancer. She is having surgery on Thursday this coming week, so their trip was cancelled. They don't know much now, but will kno...
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sarahGee
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7
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571
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Crush on a guy
(Preview)
Yep I have a crush on a guy that doesn't have a clue about me ,I don't think anyway,his now x wife divorced him for I don't know why reason,I knew him a bit back in my teen yrs just hanging out with ppl,I pm him we had a very brief conversation about nothing really ,then I saw I had a missed call from him on my mess...
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lookingup
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8
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581
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New to Al-Anon
(Preview)
I'm brand now to Al-Anon but not new to the effects that alcoholism has had on me as a person, not the effects it and drugs are having on my family and I now.
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Gary1957
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6
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496
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My Giant Thumb
(Preview)
Has shrunk so much. Its so good. It does inflate now and again and I get the whole 'I know best' 'do what I say' the whole you should... kind of vibe on the go but mostly my ego and my thumb is down to relatively realistic proportions. Hows your thumb these days?
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el-cee
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13
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688
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Honouring my feelings
(Preview)
Feeling quite low today. Time of the month. Anyway in the past I had always felt obliged to put on a happy pollyanna face for AH. Enabling his illusion that my life is wonderful. Ie that he is a fabulous husband and his daily drinking is normal. Now, when I am down. I own it. I act it, I am true to myself I will n...
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Calm Lady
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16
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658
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Trying to heal from the storm
(Preview)
Hi, I am severely depressed and I just don't know how to get through this feeling of betrayal. I have been dating an alcoholic for over a year. We just recently broke up. I know it needed to happen. There were just to many negatives to keep this relationship afloat 1) No intimacy (he's unable to get an ere...
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starcatcher2
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33
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4300
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Courage to Change (C2C) 10/13/16
(Preview)
Good morning MIP family - happy Thursday! Today's reading talks about the Al-Anon slogan of "Easy Does It". Before coming to Al-Anon, the insanity and chaos often was too much. We, without intent, did not consider that joining in, slamming doors, shouting, etc. was not the best way to handle alrea...
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Iamhere
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4
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526
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The Band-Aid That Wouldn't Come Off
(Preview)
Sigh. Last weekend x(I thought) abf asked if he could come over and I said no, I don't want you to, sorry. I guess we still hadn't had "the talk" but it's been months since we've seen each other and we talk less than once a week now (and only if he's drunk and calls me anyway). Anyway he called before and he st...
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MissM
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14
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742
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Ah relapsed again and moving out again
(Preview)
Well my ah who has relapsed a couple of times is moving out. Me- don't know what to do bc he just can't seem to stay sober and won't let things go and doesn't keep his promises to attend aa meetings or blah, blah...Him- wants to be sober but can't figure out what is wrong to not stay in recovery, and didn't wan...
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Helpangel
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8
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649
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Now that I'm sleeping better I'm having nightmares!
(Preview)
I have put a lot of work into improving my sleep and it has brought me a lot more sanity during the day. It has taken a big overhall. I've decreased my caffeine intake, Set an earlier bedtime, had to work on how to get back to sleep when I woke up in a panic about one thing or another. But in the past two weeks...
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KT2015
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4
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3369
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Realize its me
(Preview)
Things in the home front has been great. Sobriety remains in the home. That is a miracle. However, I find myself very miserable. I feel the anger inside me building up. I am so use to the insanity that now that there is structure and sanity I find it hard to deal with. I am not sure how to respond to it. Everyt...
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joker
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3
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545
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guidance and boundaries
(Preview)
I have an AH. We are young with 2 small children.. AH has been to rehab and we have done couples counseling for a while now. I set boundaries and unfortunately AH responded with yes he would follow them, but didnt follow through. I had to eventually take action. Does Al Anon support this decision? I am hav...
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searchingserenity
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9
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629
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Apparently I'm a "disease" now
(Preview)
On Thursday, in a wave of loneliness/horniness, I made a Tinder. Ex-ABF has apparently already been all over Tinder and texts me "I saw you on Tinder." Tells me Tinder is none of my business but he's been on some dates. Then proceeds to be mad because I won't be home when he is available to come pick up his c...
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Thurrayya the Khajiit
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8
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935
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A blend of progress
(Preview)
Just wanted to take a moment and share what I thought was a hint of progress on my part.. One of my AH's complaints is that I am always getting involved in his recovery. I discovered that really what was happening is that he was pulling me into his hula hoop to handle some portion of his chaos and to get me b...
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Fooled
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9
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652
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Support groups/books/etc recommendations for new girlfriend of an alcoholic in recovery
(Preview)
Hello! Can anyone recommend online support groups.. books.. any type of material really.... for dating an alcoholic? It's a new relationship - about 2 months. My boyfriend is graduating from a 30 day recovery program this weekend. He has been fighting his addiction for over 10 years and has been in m...
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Lys
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16
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703
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Waiting to hear "sorry."
(Preview)
This is something I still need to work on. I progressed to not accept abuse and such, but am still easily offended and upset by others' behaviors. If I perceive insult, slight, disrespect, or undue criticism, I will expect an apology and give stank attitude, rudeness, or snarky sarcastic comments an...
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pinkchip
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14
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1216
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Meetings with oneself.
(Preview)
I've had two today. Jest sayin'. Sorry, I really am a doofus newbie and shouldn't be holding them alone.
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geems
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13
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618
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I'm Not Measuring Up to His Program
(Preview)
I have been lurking here for over a year, and thank you all for all of the wisdom, humor and love exchanged. I was in Al-Anon many years ago, then fell away as circumstances changed. 25+ years ago met DH, who had then been in recovery for a decade...but 3 years ago went out again. 1.5 years ago he stopped dri...
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Suburban Denizen
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9
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670
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Boss and Friend relapsed. Grace in the Storm.
(Preview)
Found out a couple of days ago my boss relapsed and had an affair. While this has been really hard for me God is giving me strength to get through. Had I not just read a book on co-dependency I think I would rush into trying to "save her" mode. I have not. Insted I have been holding her accountable to her own be...
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fiercefemaleflyer
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1
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414
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C2C 10-12-16
(Preview)
Today's page shows the value of flexibility in our concepts of recovery and happiness, as becoming attached to how things "should" be creates more work for us and can delay our journey. The author first thought a fairytale relationship would be possible if only their mate was sober. Then, after find...
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Enigmatic
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2
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502
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Oh Yeah - and then there is golf.....
(Preview)
Some of you know that I took up golf about a year ago. A bit of back-story - my father golfed m whole life. My brothers all learned to golf as kids. I was not allowed - I was pushed into girl things - tap dance (not my cup of tea), jazz dance (better but still....) and finally gymnastics (love, love, love!)...
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Iamhere
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6
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693
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sadniss
(Preview)
thanks to all of you...we are a good support group . i have only been here for a couple of weeks maybe...but have gained encouragement ...united we stand...
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wildhorsehomimy
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3
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546
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Silver linings.
(Preview)
I'm in a bad mood today. About an hour ago I threw a tantrum at my computer and the cried like an overtired 3 year old while my daughter sat staring at me in horror. So I figure I'll write it out here and try to figure out where the silver linings are. Issue 1. I had to withdraw from a couple of subjects this seme...
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MissM
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9
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602
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what's a regular relationship like??
(Preview)
OK .. so it's not Facebook official .. LOL .. it's official enough. I am seeing someone exclusively .. I love every min of it and boy oh boy it would be very easy to get consumed with this relationship. He hasn't met the kids yet and will next weekend. We have been seeing each other sporadically over the...
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SerenityRUS
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21
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3098
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feeling the peace of the program more and more frequently
(Preview)
As I have probably mentioned already I have been working through step 3 with my sponsor and almost ready to move on to step four. As I work away at letting things go more and more I let things go and give them to HP I feel so much more peaceful. I'm not always peaceful all the time but I have long periods of...
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KT2015
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3
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512
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Alanon Thinking
(Preview)
Isnt it great that we have this amazing way of thinking? Im very grateful today that I can see things differently, I can think differently, I can feel good about working towards making my life a good one. For me this good life comes from my own thought processes always. Its not about material possession...
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el-cee
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5
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713
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Head and emotions aren't in sync
(Preview)
I met my daughter for lunch today,and mentioned a trip to London I am thinking of planning when I have a week off work,she has a big corparate meeting in London which involves her stopping overnight and it is an event that will involve a lot of drinking,she has said she has told people now that she is cutti...
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Marcusjohn
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3
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572
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When AnyOne, Any Where Reaches.....
(Preview)
We are know it, we've all said it and we've all probably done this to the best of our ability - Let It Begin With Me.When anyone, anywhere,reaches out for help - let the hand ofAl-Anonand Alateen always be there, andLet It Begin With Me. I made plans last week with my active son for tonight. He was to have a d...
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Iamhere
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10
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605
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Laugh for the day!
(Preview)
How many alanons does it take to screw a light bulb? None. They just detach and let it screw itself!!! -- Edited by kspec85 on Monday 10th of October 2016 05:44:30 PM
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kspec85
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12
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759
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No matter how old I get....
(Preview)
My mom possibly being angry at me still gets to me. Without going into detail I didn't invite my mom to be part of a short visit with my in laws and I did so because she hasn't participated in any visits with them in the past few years. I didn't do it to hurt her or insult her I just didn't think it was important t...
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KT2015
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10
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857
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Hope for Today Oct 11
(Preview)
Good morning everyone: Today's reading deals with some of the survival techniques we may have used growing up or being part of the chaos of an alcoholic home. The writer speaks about 'not dealing' by escaping into a world of books and art works. He goes on to say how even when he found hims in Alanon mee...
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yanksfan51
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2
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498
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a little loopy
(Preview)
going through an emotional rollercoaster today. woke up in a good mood, almost estatic. played some upbeat music, ..then suddenly i was in tears,mourning the end of my marriage. entirely my choice and a good oe..BUT its soo sad. for so many reasons. 25 yrs in which i didnt grow,go to school or further m...
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YARNCRAZY
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5
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490
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Hope for Today 10-10-16
(Preview)
Today's Hope for Today page has a tool that I have found to be extremely useful: using Step 1 backwards. It goes like this: I don't always correctly identify things I am powerless over or should not be trying to control. I do know, however, when I am feeling that things are unmanageable. When I am feeling...
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Enigmatic
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11
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599
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Rescue dog
(Preview)
I gained a new addition to my little family yesterday -- Bosco, the Boston Terrier. He's a 9 year old sassy and sophisticated senior and has merged seamlessly in with the other pets (another Boston and two cats). These sweet pets are so healing and therapeutic (and fun!). It's really hard for me to feel...
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e_i_m
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14
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668
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short tolerance span.
(Preview)
Jeepers this disease has taken its toll. I am finding it incredibly difficult to find compassion or tolerance for the willfully ill. The loved one in question is so sick! So martyred and controlling and just bloody crazy. I don't know if recognising this is because they've gotten sicker or I've gotte...
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a4l
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7
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723
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NewComer
(Preview)
Good Morning, I hope this is the correct place to post this introduction. As indicated, I am a newcomer to Alanon and so happy to have found this resource. I live in a small town with only a couple of meetings per week, not well attended even so. I took my 24 year old son to treatment this past Friday. i was fi...
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RecoveryMom1491
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7
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546
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Choosing to disengage
(Preview)
Today is our Canadian Thanksgiving. We have not heard from our son and do not expect to. That is his choice and we are learning to live with it. We were invited to a sister's outdoor cookout but chose not to go. She also has invited one nephew who is an 'in the closet' alcoholic. In the closet because no one i...
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deacon
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5
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605
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Wavering in my resolve to set boundaries
(Preview)
Dh and I decided we are going to give the twins a choice: sobriety and they can live here or not living a sober life out there. This will leave them homeless because after nearly 4 years of the stealing, drinking, lying, drugs, puking, etc other family members are done allowing the chaos in their homes as...
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themoonandthestars
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7
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753
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I would like to find a sponsor here
(Preview)
I cannot attend face to face meetings but would love to find a sponsor who can help guide me through the steps. How do I go about finding a sponsor?
If it helps someone decide if they are a good fit for me-I have been coming to this online site for almost four years. I came because I finally realized that my (...
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lgnutah
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1
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464
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Living the single life
(Preview)
I'm going on 3 mths being single for the 1st time in my life,wow,lol.i can laugh about it now for I always thought it to being impossible to do without a qualifier in my life,there's down days and good days,im finding everyday to be a healing day,it's totally diff,living alone and without any qualifier...
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lookingup
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12
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726
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Tallinn Al Anon 23th birthday...
(Preview)
Yes today will be Tallinn Al Anon 23. Birthday and i as organizer of it feel bit scary as i am not sure in guidelines still....praying for serenity over myself...
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kadriliisa
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6
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682
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Can't stop worrying?
(Preview)
I can't seem to stop worrying. I got home from a great day with my 13 yo daughter to find an empty house. None of my 3 boys are responding to my texts. That's a bad sign. Dh isn't here and I just don't feel strong enough to deal with drunk/high teens. It was just a week ago when someone dumped one of them in my yar...
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themoonandthestars
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6
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623
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And.....it's here - grateful
(Preview)
Today is the day...29 years ago, right about now, I woke up in a treatment center that I arrived at the night before. I arrived in a 'state' so, upon awakening on 10/8/87, I began a journey like no other. Had someone, anyone told me then I would be here now, I would have laughed in their face and probably s...
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Iamhere
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19
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717
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Sunday Grattitudes n Stuff
(Preview)
I've been kind of morose and defeatist of late and I think gratitude might be the cure so, I'm trying to be on a gratitude binge. So far so good. This morning I woke reasonably early and lazed in bed for a good hour writing and daydreaming and being grateful for Sunday. I then suggested to my offspring that...
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MissM
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8
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580
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Apple!
(Preview)
Is there anything more annoying than the sound of a sloppy drunk eating an apple? *** Pauses to think ****. Nope, don't think there is. As she quickly dashes off to another room to escape it!!
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Calm Lady
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13
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513
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C2C Reading 10-9-2016
(Preview)
The C2C reading for October 9 speaks about our attitude toward God. It suggests that prior to program, many of us have had an adversarial relationship with God. We were engaged in the battle of wills and we didn't want God to win. We refused to accept God was all powerful and many therefore hit a huge, e...
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hotrod
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4
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497
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What do you think this means?
(Preview)
So my BF has been at rehab in Florida, he called me tonight and said someone asked him if I was going to come down for family week, where they integrate us etc into their treatment I guess, etc. He told me, ever since someone put the idea in his head, he was "all for it" as far as me coming down. I said of course I...
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Desperateinnyc
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3
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528
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Handling things well
(Preview)
AH was in touch to apologize and get back on track again and asked to come home. I offered to meet for coffee. He had me pick him up because he was drunk. I felt sorry for him. i think he really wants to do better. He has his plan of what to do. He said he would work on detoxing the rest of the day so he could drive ho...
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sunmustshine
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3
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559
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Husband gone to rehab - but what now?
(Preview)
After a pretty awful couple of months (years?) My husband has finally gone into rehab. He will be there for a month at least. I am so happy that he is finally sorting out his problem. The trouble is, things have been pretty horrible for me for a while now. I have learnt to detach from him and get on with my own...
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TheWife
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8
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719
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I am somewhat nervous.
(Preview)
It has been months since I have posted anything on here. I haven't been really practicing my program & haven't been to very many meetings. I feel kind of ashamed to admit that I may be backsliding into some of my old behaviors. I miss being on here but sometimes feel what I say may go on a deaf ear since I...
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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521
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Progress
(Preview)
So today I did things a little differently. AH is working from home, and drinking while doing it. While part of me wanted to feel sorry for myself, I reminded myself that's his choice and what will my choice be? Always have that plan B :) I went to the gym, ran errands, cleaned house, all things that made me...
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MidnightOwl
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6
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578
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Drama and Passion
(Preview)
Are they somehow linked? Why do some of us get away from our qualifiers and then find ourselves once again in a similar relationship? Do we miss the drama? Is it somehow "passion" we are really looking for? Are we drawn in by drama mistaking it for passion? Just thinking about this today, what do you thin...
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LinSC
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6
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619
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Courage To Change 8/10
(Preview)
Today's c2c speaks of the miracles that result from finding al-anon and realising that we are not alone, and our situation is not hopeless after all. Learning that others have been through the awful emotions that come with trying to live with someone else's alcoholism- and that they have not only got...
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MissM
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2
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476
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Funny little exercise in detachment.
(Preview)
I like Magpies. They're smart. When my daughter was just learning to toddle around our back yard, many moons ago, a magpie family started to visit each day when we were outside. Mum and dad would sit on the fence and watch while baby magpie and my teetering offspring chased each other very slowly around...
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MissM
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9
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774
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Off topic...
(Preview)
Why in some posters posts and replies does their message have a black diamond with a white question mark in it after the sentences??
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jojo8466
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3
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416
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online sponsorship?
(Preview)
Does online sponsorship exist? I was just reading, and one of the important ways to work the program is by having a sponsor. I'm very isolated here and don't have access to Al-anon meetings. Working full time with kids makes is impossible to travel the 6-hr round trip it would be to the closest Al-anon m...
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hiraeth
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6
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992
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More than depression
(Preview)
I am not happy. There I said it. I am not happy its more than just unhappiness its unrest. Its every morning not wanting to get out of bed because I have responsibilities to face that should not be just mine. My A is an emotional and physical cripple that just cannot handle any type of responsibility...
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Fooled
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8
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759
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This too shall pass!!
(Preview)
I love that slogan, sounds so simple and can role of the tongue without much meaning but today I can see that everything passes, good times, bad times, the lot. My dis-ease raised its ugly head the last couple of days, got stuck in my own head and it was all me, me, me. Why cant I control the people in my life?...
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el-cee
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6
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1210
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