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ODAT Reading 11-21-2017
(Preview)
The ODAT reading for November 21 speaks about the importance of keeping an open mind and embracing the humility of the program. The reading provides an example of a family who are accustomed to entertaining and when one enters AA, cannot understand why the alcohol consumption must be eliminated Th...
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hotrod
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3
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1832
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hi i guess
(Preview)
im debbie, and im engaged to an alcoholic. he doesnt lie, cheat or steal, like some. hes the hardest working man ive ever known, honest to a fault, and a good man. And most of the time, his drinking doesnt affect anything. Except when it does. We are in the process of him moving from Canada to the US. He is ho...
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wikedfairy
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6
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1434
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does it ever just go away
(Preview)
Living with an active A, at times could be pure hell. I never knew who was walking through the door. I was always on guard of what I said, as not start some pointless argument. I would often go to bed feeling empty and alone. Now here I am getting some of what I had prayed for, yet still feeling as crappy as I h...
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Curlyblu
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6
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452
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Do I go along with the lies?!
(Preview)
Hi everyone, it's been so long since I have posted here, but I read this board religiously and it keeps me grounded, especially the stories from a few of you that have recently left their alcoholic partners like me, I have been separated since July. I still try and make it to f2f meetings, and I'm in thera...
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VickiR
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8
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1865
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Need help in understanding my relationship with AH
(Preview)
This is all so hard and I am soooooo thankful I have found this community to help me through this difficult time, and allows me to vent frustrations. So as I have said before in other posts--my AH is one that drinks only at night and usually 3-4 beers about 4 -5 nights a week. In order to cope and keep sane an...
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Dancer66
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2
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2100
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STEP 10
(Preview)
http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t64131660/alanon-step-10-11-19-2017/
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hotrod
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1
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2135
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Sinking feelings as I join the new PSA!
(Preview)
My two girls have just started school. Its a great time in our lives. I eagerly volunteered to be a member of the new Parent Staff Association. However, one meeting in and two days of WhatsApp messages I am experiencing sinking feelings, dread, anxiety and probably a good dose of confusion. I feel that...
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Faintly Falling
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17
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1019
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Not proud of my behavior
(Preview)
I am feeling so angry this morning again. The feeling inside me feels so awful. I feel in rage. I went to a face to face meeting last night and shared my feelings. I was so angry and i cried. I came home to the alcoholic drunk and he spend hours, upon hours talking to to his ex-wife who he says he plans to go back...
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joker
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3
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2921
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Tenderness
(Preview)
I had never heard that as a topic before in any recovery meeting I've ever been to. I went to the morning meeting because I needed to be in the dialogue where I often find the characteristics of my Higher Power and a friend of mine started the sharing and with the topic of Tenderness and I got triggered b...
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Jerry F
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6
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1047
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A Practical Sleep Tip
(Preview)
I'm often reading something on my phone before bed or pulling it out if I've been tossing and turning. Once that light hits my eyes it's all over. Very difficult to get back to sleep. And even with the screen dimmed completely it's too bright. A couple months ago I downloaded a blue-light filter app. I fa...
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WestMan
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5
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1676
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Light and Polite
(Preview)
Hi Folks Iâm new to the board and Al-Anon. Iâve been to 4 meetings and asked someone to sponsor me. Iâve been in and out of 12 step meetings for many years. In other programs I was encouraged to work an honest program but my new sponsor keeps telling me to keep it light and Polite and it seems like sheâs telli...
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The Learner
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4
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2079
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Hope for Today Nov 19
(Preview)
Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is about accepting the work we need to do for ourselves. I understand that many (including me) came to this program thinking it may help fix situations that arose with our qualifiers or even, may help fix our qualifiers! I quickly learned that I had plenty to do i...
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yanksfan51
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2
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2684
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odat 11/18/17
(Preview)
I am Grateful for Alanon ,and that I'm a part of a worldwide group that offers me a better way of life despite the difficulties of living with an alcoholic/drug addict . their social and customs are different from mine,the spirit that motivates us is the same .this holds us together as one united fellow...
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lookingup
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2
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1646
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Told my son
(Preview)
Yesterday I told my son that I changed the legal separation to DIVORCE. I told him that it took awhile, but in looking inward and working on me, I realized that even if his dad came out of rehab a new and improved version of himself, I would be thankful for that, and so happy FOR HIM, but I found that I will al...
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PosiesandPuppies
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5
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2101
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Anger
(Preview)
My husband just decided to go to rehab and it's been a long struggle before hand. I'm relieved that he went because it has been a long time struggling to deal with the consequences of his actions and the pain that he's caused our family. because I have two beautiful children that I didn't want to separate...
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Willing2try
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3
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1429
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As a Child of an Alcoholic
(Preview)
... and as an adult member of Alanon, I'm grateful for lessons learned in this program. I wish my non alcoholic parent had had the benefit of this program when I was living in our home with an active alcoholic. If my parent had been a member of Alanon, they might have read the Merrygoround of Denial pamphl...
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tiredtonite
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4
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1259
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Is al anon right for me?
(Preview)
I am considering attending an al anon meeting where I live but I'm not sure if my situation is right for these meetings, so I help that someone can help me. I've looked the things on our UK website that help you decide whether al anon is right and some of them I answer yes to but only a few. My husband is sobe...
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Juno
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10
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2711
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Spoke my truth
(Preview)
After last night alcoholic being drunk and calling me down again, said I was lazy, I refuse too work, he is disgusted that I am not working, while he has to get up every morning and go to work, ect..I went to bed and put in ear plugs and went went to sleep. I did not wake up this morning at 5 am like I usually do, a...
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joker
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1
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1242
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When will I learn
(Preview)
I've been slowly building evidence of my husband's drinking problem and looking for a way out. I'm a stay at home.mom with no access to our money. However, things have gotten to the breaking point. Yesterday I had a Dr appt and he said the kids could stay home with him while I went. However, he was drink an...
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Isthisreallife
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1
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1695
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Courage to Change (C2C) 11/17/17
(Preview)
Good morning all. Today's reading is about "Keep Coming Back". It's a phrase that is stated and heard in recovery all the time. The writer discusses why it's so important. Many of us have grown so hardened in our fight with alcoholics or flights from them that we find it difficult to sit still for th...
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Iamhere
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2
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2078
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How to keep busy
(Preview)
I have been trying to keep myself busy so that I am thinking of the alcoholic and ways to keep myself so busy he does not see me. I have been going to face to face meetings but I find I am still around the house when the alcoholic is around and I really need to get a life of my own so I do not see the alcoholic much. W...
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joker
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1
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2422
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The A and social media
(Preview)
Did/Does anyone have issues with the A posting on social media? this was One of my biggest problems and I donât see anyone addressing this.. my boyfriend would be drinking and go on Facebook and post the most ridiculous statuses or pictures and it was obvious that he had been drinking . was very embarra...
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Aerin
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11
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2717
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Alcoholic 20 something son...
(Preview)
First time to this board. I think, as a mom, I'm just trying to stick to the "rules" as given to me at Hazelden. I learned a lot in the classes that I attended as my 23 year old son was an inpatient there for 30 days. I was so optimistic and he seemed so much better. Although during his stay, he never relented fr...
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Auntielala
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14
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2595
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Down again
(Preview)
I was in such a good place yesterday. I am not back in the dumps again. I cried this morning, as I was so hurt. It felt good to cry. I went to a face to face meeting last night and I came home to the alcoholic drinking beer again. I got angry with him as I came home to see him drinking. I should have known better the...
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joker
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1
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2004
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Feeling acceptance
(Preview)
My crazy emotions of anger feels like it has gone down, finally. I was feeling so angry and now I feel a sense of giving up. I can not change the alcoholic. I do not discuss drinking anymore with him. I just let him be. Drink, see if I care. I just have given up completely. He is drinking daily now and I say what...
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joker
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2
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346
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Hope for Today 11/16/17
(Preview)
Today's reading in Hope for Today shares about letting go and letting God. The writer discusses a first trip after becoming handicapped. She was anxious to be travelling alone and even a bit more so because her travel was to another country with different customs, etc. She used her tools to get read...
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Iamhere
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2
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2012
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Thursday Morning MIP ALanon Meeting About to Start
(Preview)
Good Morning Everyone, If you would like an Alanon meeting, please join us. Our topics this morning are Choices, Courage to Change ane the slogan Listen and Learn. Thanks TT
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tiredtonite
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1
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2427
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Breathe/Stay on my side of the street
(Preview)
Difficult day today filled with much drama and extreme worry. As I had anticipated, AD relationship has gone from bad to worse. I did involve myself to the extent of calling the police this afternoon following a text from her that he had thrown her keys to her vehicle in the bushes when she attempted t...
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serenity47
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13
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492
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can you help me understand? (double winners?)
(Preview)
i'm still processing everything i went through with my ex, who is recently in recovery. wondering if anyone can shed light on this addiction question. when we were together he went through 2 outpatient detox programs and 2 inpatient detox/rehabs. he stopped drinking, at least for some time. but the...
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Junenine
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12
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451
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Today's Hope November 15
(Preview)
Good morning MIP! I am off my normal routine today, and so I'm using yesterday's posting from today's hope online for today's topic. That seemed like a great fit because the share is about accepting change. The author shares that there have been times they are terrified of change, and that fear prev...
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Skorpi
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3
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368
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Nervous about first al anon - angry and feeling sick
(Preview)
Most days this is how I wake up. As the day goes on I do get better as I will speak to myself and do things to take my mind off my AH. todsy Is not a good day Ive woke up shoutwe at my kids and now I feel terrible. I feel hurt and rejected today and used. AH keeps sending me messages each day - sMall ones. their s...
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CarlyH
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3
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395
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Looking back on breakup with A BF- he seems great
(Preview)
I had a breakup for the books with A ex bf. I moved on to date someone who is a non drinker. We have a wonderful time together.. it has been 2 years since I saw my ex. I cut all contact with him. He trailed off on trying to contact me this Jan. If you had asked me then what was going to happen to him, I would have sa...
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giraffe13
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11
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618
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ODAT reading 11-14-2017
(Preview)
The ODAT reading for November 14, states the simple fact that we find that God is more conscious to us when we are in the depths of despair. The reading suggests that this is when we are able to say" please God help.".It then goes on to remind us that when we do receive. help we should turn to God to ack...
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hotrod
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6
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425
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ALANON STEP 9 POSTED TO THE STEP WORK BOARD
(Preview)
Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery together! Step 9 Has been posted to the Step Board. Here is the link : http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t64115420/alan...
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hotrod
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1
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332
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Need help
(Preview)
Ive not felt this insecure in years.... my AH has been sober for almost a month and he is doing great. Going to outpatient classes and AA meetings. He is making new friends that understand his struggle. I guess you can say Im jealous.... I want to Be his person but he has all these new people (men and w...
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Heaven76
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10
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598
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Just checking in!!!!!
(Preview)
Hey all!! Just checking in to say "hey" and to let you all know that , no, I wasn't kidnapped, I had a back spasm and have been doing research on what I can do to PREVENT or at least, Lessen these horrible episodes...This year I have had THREE...usually I get one, maybe 2 per year but this year has been awful....
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mamalioness
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3
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341
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Should AH have consequences?
(Preview)
My AH was sober for many, many years. I told him I was going to divorce him and he stopped out of fear. Then the disease was back. He attends AA meetings but relapse is common. I've been told relapse is part of recovery. Recovery seems far off. I used to ask if he was drinking and he would always lie. No...
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wifeofalcoholic
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8
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751
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How Can A Alcoholic really give up people he loves?
(Preview)
I do know its disease and I guess I should know by now that they are sick. But I still atruggle with how can they give up someone they love (wife, gf, kids, parents) just for a drink? Even during early recovery it seems they would rather lose it all than have the most supportive people around them. Is it sham...
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Aerin
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15
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647
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C2C, 11/13
(Preview)
First Things First: The writer speaks of getting caught up in day-to-day trivial matters and therefore he/she forgets to have time for the really important things. For him, a helpful slogan is First Things First, to get priorities in order. He says that his serenity if his first priority, and tha...
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Lyne
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3
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360
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Hope for today nov 12
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about serenity; how doe we achieve it? Why did it seem elusive when we were new to the program? Can we be in control of our serenity? Something that resonated with me from this page was how the writer described her experience as a weathervane- her movement (sere...
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yanksfan51
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7
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460
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Checking in, and checking myself
(Preview)
Hi MIP family - So, Im still living with my STBXAH. Hes staying at our house during the holidays and moving out in the New Year. He has gone entirely underground with his drinking. This is a guy who doesnt pick up after himself for 20 years, and now I havent seen an empty beer can for months and theres not...
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BethBethBeth
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6
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585
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C2C 11-11-2017
(Preview)
C2C reading for today speaks about the 3rd step in addition to the the definition of insanity. I love this explanation of insanity as it described my reaction so well. It suggests that doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results is insanity and offers the 3rd Step as a succe...
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hotrod
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4
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497
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Good visit with my sponsor!
(Preview)
I have been sitting lately with lots of guilt, lots of resentment, and lots of anger. Not sure why, as I thought I had let all that go. So after reading so many posts yesterday, I had dinner with my sponsor to talk these feelings out. I won't share it all here, but it was such a good meeting for me! I went to sig...
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PosiesandPuppies
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7
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620
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The strength to move forward
(Preview)
i havent been here in almost 2 years. I was living in blissful denial that my AH was doing well. Heck I even celebrated his 2year mark with telling him how proud I was of him...Deep down I knew he was drinking, I had hoped he would honor his promise of being honest with me if he drank. Our deal was as long as he w...
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Paisley74
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4
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503
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Not sure how to handle this
(Preview)
My husband was in rehab for a month. Stayed sober for about 3 months. I am in retail and need to work weekends. When I come home from work I can tell that he has been drinking. I havent said anything to him about it yet. I love him dearly and he is a wonderful person when sober. Need some advice as to how to handl...
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Carla61
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12
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480
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On gratitude and faith.
(Preview)
Bit out of sorts so as per the subject line, I must remind myself of what matters.
Today I am grateful for my true friends.
I am grateful for the yard I'm sitting in with the tree and the grass and the birds singing with the blue sky.
I am grateful for my able body.
I am grateful for my sponsor.
I am g...
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a4l
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7
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508
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Epiphany
(Preview)
Hi :) I've been through some pretty serious inner turmoil this week, but yesterday brought something very important to the forefront of my mind, something I'd been hiding from since I was 10 or 11. I'm very grateful that my recent pain and worry has brought me to this, and I think this might be the first t...
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Aline
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4
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389
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Courage to Change (C2C) 11/10/17
(Preview)
Today's reading discusses our concept and slogan of "One Day at a Time". We are reminded in recovery that we can only deal with the here and now. When we can stay here and now, we are more realistic about what we can do to improve our situation. Being and staying present helps to get rid of the constant u...
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Iamhere
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5
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417
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How Important Is It?
(Preview)
Today I have some serious stressors, and it is important for me to focus on my alanon tools instead: How important is it, Keep it simple, Let go and let God, etc. I have a choice before me to succumb to the pain and worry, or be aware of what blessings I do have, and what I can accomplish for me. Sometimes I...
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Lyne
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3
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375
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Mum/Dad prototypes and being a baby
(Preview)
Good evening (or morning), MIP :) I just realized clearly what I've been kind of suspecting for a while now. A part of my interactions/relationships with any people is an almost precise copy of the relationship dynamic I saw between my parents. Sometimes I'm Mum (well-meaning yet bossy, "managing"...
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Aline
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3
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398
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Natural consequences
(Preview)
Im working on my enabling behaviors and acceptance that Im powerless over it all but that Im not helpless and Im sure not going to sit around in denial. After adjustments to my boundaries I made progress and it feels like another level of growth and maturity. Being the watcher of my alcoholics conseque...
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_bunny_
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5
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3358
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Can he do it
(Preview)
My partner/best friend (we don't live together) is due to come out of hospital tomorrow after being in for 2 weeks. He was told if he drinks again, he will not make it to Christmas. He is saying he "just wont drink". I keep asking him what he is going to put in place to make sure he doesn't drink again - his...
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Thistime
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8
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400
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Stuggling still ..
(Preview)
I'm going to dismiss most of this to hormones because that's what it seems to be based upon the calendar however that doesn't change my frustration at the moment. My daughter and I had an outstanding visit that was LONG overdue. A month is to long for her not to be home and I do think some of it is that she c...
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SerenityRUS
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6
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1142
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Courage to Change (C2C) 11/9/17
(Preview)
Today's reading talks about how we use manipulation as a ways of coping to the affects of the disease of alcoholism. Alcoholism can create such a threatening environment that manipulation seems necessary. As we progress through recovery, we are learning to do more than just survive! We also lea...
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Iamhere
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3
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362
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Seething with anger
(Preview)
Just for today, I HATE my AH! I am currently seething with anger, feeling out of control and just pissed off. I thought I had a handle on blaming my qualifier for what I have to go through, but I guess I don't. I've just spent 20 minutes bawling my eyes out because I am so angry! At this moment, I can't just sit...
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PosiesandPuppies
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16
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589
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Courage to Change November 8
(Preview)
Good morning, MIP! Today's reading is about the act of service, or an act of kindness. The author shares that doing something nice for someone else without them knowing about it, and without expecting to get anything back in return is a strategy they used to build their own spiritual well-being. Eng...
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Skorpi
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11
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408
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advise/suggestion/help, minor coming home from rehab
(Preview)
hi all, its been a while. granddaughter 17, coming home from rehab, (2 months), in about a week. her parents and us live in one house. she seems to be doing well. since we all live together i want to ask 'being her village/support, now that she is coming home, what/how do we help her to be successful'...
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runi
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4
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371
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Using program to handle sarcasm
(Preview)
My partner can be quite sarcastic and, oftentimes, our humor doesn't really match up. I don't care for sarcasm but I understand it because my XAH was so skilled at using it and I became pretty good at it, myself. Hey, he taught by example and I caught on, I guess. But, I truly try to NOT be hurtful and to g...
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andromeda
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5
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475
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posting question new
(Preview)
How to I change the writing to single space. thanks sherry
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sdsherry
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2
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310
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Hope for Today nov 5
(Preview)
Good morning everyone: Todays reading focuses on the suggested closing we have which includes-...though you may not like all of us, youll love us in a very special way- the same way we already love you. The writer remembers not believing the words in that statement because he/she did not feel that way...
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yanksfan51
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4
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328
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