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I feel finally feel like I am starting to let go
(Preview)
I have been home now for two weeks and I returned home to empty promises which I know is my own fault. After all, nothing changes if nothing changes. The honeymoon period has already ended and I have watched my husband rant and rave on a couple of occasions about whatever injustice he seems to thin...
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JulieLynn
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2
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681
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Angry
(Preview)
Yesterday night wasn't that good. Well my husband said he was going to Quick Check and then when his boss called I went out side and there was no car. He had taken my car without saying he was going to take it. I was upset with him. His boss came to pick him up because he said he would be back. I was...
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nycbt
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1
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654
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Quote to share
(Preview)
" I may not be where I want to be, but I'm sure as heck not where I was!" Wynonna Judd
She is going through her own difficulties in life and said this on Oprah yesterday and it just grabbed at me!!
Her thought for the day deffinately applies to all of us.
When we are not feeling quite as good about our rec...
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jj
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3
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595
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An update from the long lost CAPTCODEE
(Preview)
   Hey all. I have been such a delinquent (how the heck do you spell that anyhow). Since I have moved back with the hubby, and into the big city, I have been so bad. I don't think I have posted once since I have lived in Calgary! What kind of example is that.
So, j...
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captcodee
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3
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657
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mental health answering machine
(Preview)
Answering Machine at the Mental Hospital: "Hello, and welcome to the mental health hotline. If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you or offer to press 2 for them. If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5, and 6. If you...
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rosie light shines
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2
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638
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my first post
(Preview)
Hi Everyone,
I am not sure if I am doing this right but here goes. I found this website last night and just wanted to say thankyou to everyone who has already posted. Just reading the messages has helped me enormously. I have contacted a counsellor today for me to heal and find out obstacles that lay a...
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leo
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14
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843
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The disease/the human person
(Preview)
hi, just thought i would say how i see the separation of the disease and the loved one.
I use the analogy that if he had a brain tumor that made his behavior not something
very loveable, I would still love him.
My mother was the best to me. She got a tiny bit impatient when she was so bad
with the b...
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debilyn
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6
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689
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Scared to ask for a sponcer
(Preview)
I love this board! I have been going to f2f meetings for about 6 weeks and I know that I need a sponcer but I feel some weird shame and fear and so much resistance from myself...like I don't deserve one or someone will say yes but not want to...i am very reluctant to ask and I find it almost impossible to make p...
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Maypole
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7
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910
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Sunday night chair needed
(Preview)
Hello OP's
Could someone please chair the Sunday evening 7pm meeting for me?
I leave for the Netherlands tomorrow to visit my brother and his family and will be unable to chair.
Thank-you so very much
Megan
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megan
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0
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637
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Lou
(Preview)
Yes, I did know my husband for three years before we married, and yes, he did neglect to tell me that he was a recovering alcoholic. I think your word, "recovered" is a word I do not use. He lived in England you see, so our f2f meetings were not on a daily basis. We would see one another every three or four mont...
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Diva
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2
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859
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I did something for ME last night
(Preview)
Last night I went to a rubber stamping party. I can't tell you how good it felt. I really was hesitant about going because Tues. especially are one of the A's drinking nights. He of course stopped at the bar after work and he knew I was going to this and that I had to leave early. So I just starting dinner - gri...
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dogscribe
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9
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708
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just a poem.....
(Preview)
this is a poem i wrote one day, when i was trying to understand my how alcoholics think and react......not sure how true it is.
I AM Sober
This is how I see the alcoholic
CONSUMED, LIQUID HELL
MY MIND SATURATED…EMPTY
...
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debi
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0
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539
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A Lesson in Change
(Preview)
Found this in my email today - just wanted to share.
A Lesson in Change It took a major health scare for me to learn that I needed to start paying attention to my life. By Alan Alda I was in an ambulance, bumping down a mountain road for an hour and a half. Someone on a gurney was moaning at the top of his voice...
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kismetstrand
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4
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687
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My work
(Preview)
Hi Rommies,
I just need to get some stuff off my chest about work. I took off some time from work. (since July 4th) I was fighting with my boss and told his boss about his inablilty to manage many times. Which I'm sure got back to him. Well I asked for some time off at the begining of the summer. Well now I w...
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nikkilou
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4
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697
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Anyone heard this before??
(Preview)
Hey all
I went to a new f2f last week just to see what it would be like. Well I heard two things that were pretty cool to me.
1. A woman said that she had a God Box. And some of you probably know what this is but for those of you that don't. A God Box as she explained it is wher...
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browneyes
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5
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788
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hp's still working
(Preview)
well, i guess whether people are interested in what i share or not, i'm going to keep sharing, cuz it's helping. my a just got done with ANOTHER one of his weeks of 5 weeks of vacation a year, and i have been AMAZED at how i have not engaged in the things he does when he is on vacation. usua...
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search41
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4
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568
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Life in Sobriety (ROFLMAO)
(Preview)
Pardon my Humor here, [I am a mischievious alanoner!] My now sober spouse of 9 months thought I 'HAD' to say 'goodbye' to him, before I came to town.
(hello, like does he ever say 'bye' to me when he scrambles to town for coffeeshop?)
Anyway, I smile, grinned, and " Saluted!"
He just smiled bac...
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wallsal55
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1
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609
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my best friends!! steps 1-2 and 3
(Preview)
Basic Text, p.92
As using addicts, despair was our relentless companion. It colored our every waking moment. Despair was born of our experience in active addiction: No matter what measures we tried to make our lives better, we slid ever deeper into misery. Attempts we made to control our lives fre...
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rosie light shines
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1
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678
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Quote for Today
(Preview)
xxxxxxxxxx If God has a Hand in it, Then That's Love [italic]/i]
Are there not two points in the adventure of the diver? One...when a beggar, he prepares to plunge? Two--when a prince he ri...
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wallsal55
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0
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516
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Childhood baggage
(Preview)
"Hope for Today"...Sept 26th reading
"My husband was not the sole cause of our troubles. I had been denying that my illness was deeply affecting our marriage."
"If I am experiencing difficulty in a relationshiop, the root cause may be in my alcoholic upbringing. Once I find that ro...
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sg
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2
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621
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living with my God within
(Preview)
A.A. Thought for the Day
Continuing the consideration of the term spiritual experience: "What often takes place in a few months could seldom have been accomplished by years of self discipline. With few exceptions, our members find that they have tapped an unsuspected inner resource which they p...
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rosie light shines
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0
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493
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Panicky
(Preview)
Today I am panicky over things - some I am powerless over.
1. I have to move Oct. 31 & there is no 1 bed. apt. available to date - esp. w/ hurricane vics moving in. I have to have 1st floor & other needs since I'm disabled. If I don't move, my rent will increase by $300 per month. I've been calling - turning thi...
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cedarpines
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2
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546
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love me or leave me....i am gonna be me!!!
(Preview)
Love me or leave me…but it will be AS I AM!!!!!
What I have wanted is consistency, ever since the day back in Wyncote when my mom and dad split. I have wanted to be liked. I have wanted to be loved. I have wanted to be in a family-type atmosphere. --Reggie Jackson
How many of us gave ourselves away...
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rosie light shines
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1
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788
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slipped again
(Preview)
Hello all:
Well, as you know yesterday was my birthday. My A had been calling for a week about our anniversary and my birthday to see me. I passed on our anniversary. After this weekend and his being there for me, I gave in on my birthday. I was having a horrible day all day, and he called several times to s...
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Kim
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3
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624
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need support....i slipped
(Preview)
sept 27, 2005
NEED SUPPORT_big slip
i have been playing my affirmation tapes for 36 days now, trying to be able to love and accept me as i am...not demanding perfection out of me...but to love me as i am....well i thought i was making huge progress, lately........than the big test
las...
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rosie light shines
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5
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634
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Looking back on early recovery
(Preview)
Had an interesting session with my therapist last night, the guy my ex and I stopped going to a year ago. Talking to him about what happened between my wife and I these past couple of years, something became clear to me. We were talking about what I was or wasn’t doing to meet my wife’s expe...
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UncleLou
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7
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798
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M-I-L put things into perspective
(Preview)
My mother-in-law put things into perspective for me. I interviewed at Wal-mart yesterday and was not crazy about the idea of a job there because it was a pay cut of almost $4.00 per hour. I guess I somehow felt it was beneath what I was capable of. I was trying to hold off for one of the m...
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Powerless
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2
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641
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"right back up" or trying to
(Preview)
September 27 Right Back Up
"There is something in our self-destructive personalities that cries for failure."
Basic Text, p.77
######ROSIE…I am sharing on this NA share because no matter what the group??? It is still 12 steps and still recovery…..
"Poor me;...
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rosie light shines
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0
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585
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how can i get his car out of my name
(Preview)
our two cars are in my name and i want to get his out of my name and to get the plates and turn them in. otherwise tickets and trouble will come to me and i cant afford any more problems in my life right now. my family said report the car stolen but i dont want him to get any trouble. he has enough pro...
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chrissy
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6
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687
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Sponsor Advice Needed!
(Preview)
I am doing a lot better these days. Working on doing things for me (and my kids) not my A. I have started going to 2 f2f meetings a week ....not sure if i will be able to keep this up since i need someone to watch our foster child when I'm away! I'm going to kep trying though! I have set a few boundries and am stick...
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sandie123
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2
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681
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Can it be so simple,,,to,,,,"Let it begin with me?:
(Preview)
I can easily itemize my loved ones limitations. Hours pass while I list the ways in which "he" could stand to change.
But not one thing has ever improved as a result of this mental criticism, All it does is keep my mind on someone other than me. Instead of admitting my powerlessness over another person...
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gardengal
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4
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1189
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My ex's inappropriate behavior part II
(Preview)
This was my ex's weekend with the kids. (We are both in the same house in seperate bedrooms until it sells) Friday evening, while she's still not home from work, my 14 yr old son has 2 friends over, one from the neighborhood, another driven over by his parents. I leave them at 7:00 to go to an AA meeting. My e...
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UncleLou
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8
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861
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Uncle Lou
(Preview)
Believe it or not, I have never known another alcoholic besides my husband, so have chosen you to hopefully answer a couple of questions. I read your post below about the alcoholic hating himself, being insecure and afraid, and I suppose I believe all of that is true. At the same time, my glorious A seem...
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Diva
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14
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755
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haxigonian XXIX
(Preview)
[[ room ]]
I'm sorry for being such a wet blanket this weekend. I now understand what's going on and there is nothin I can do about it. It's called complex grief. The losses have come so fast and there has been so much additional crap that I haven't had the time to grieve em.
Th...
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haximon
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3
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667
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hello again
(Preview)
Hi everyone.
Well, my birthday is today. And the whole weekend a bust. An argument with my friends (one of whom is my best friend) erupted (it is a long story) however, it was my standing up for myself and not accepting unaccpetable behavior that started it however, in the end I also got v...
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Kim
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4
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616
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sharing my path and miracles
(Preview)
HI Ya'll, I have not done a yak in a long time. Been so into reading everyones
shares. What a strong, neat group of people!!
Life sorta settled for a bit. Have been seeing Social Security fall into place and to begin my benefits. I was told by them that my long term would not be offset, that I would
c...
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debilyn
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4
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797
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It is so odd...
(Preview)
It is so odd that I feel more productive now that I am not working than when I was. I have been able to really get the house clean and keep it that way, cook wonderful meals, go to the library, run errands, apply for food stamps, recertify for medicaid for the children and...
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Powerless
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2
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586
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now i found out he is doing drugs too
(Preview)
i am so dumb i cant believe he is doing drugs this guy called my husbands cell phone. i was playing dective and it was his drug dealer he said he just sold my husband 30dollar weed bag.
i didnt even know he was doing drugs too. he said him & this other guy hooked up he said my husband...
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chrissy
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10
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775
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update
(Preview)
For those that have followed my story here's an update.
As most of you know my husband has been seeking sobriety for 6 months. He has mostly failed and has been on very long binges, no work and been pretty unavailable to myself, his family and his small children.
He is sober 18 days now....
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mom to 2
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11
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709
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looking for Frank33 from chat room
(Preview)
I'm looking for Frank33 from the chat room. I talked to him a week ago and really would like to get in touch with him. If anyone sees him please ask him to read this post and send me a message where I can get in touch with him. Or just reply to this and I will send him my message. Thanks.
Sandie123
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sandie123
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0
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521
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Footwork
(Preview)
I have been having such a hard time lately keeping my mind on "one day at a time" worrying about what will I do IF I make the choice to leave the home for awhile. Of course, a gazillion scenarios come creeping into my head and w/three kids and a houseful of animals, I, at times, felt stuck...like I was powerl...
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sg
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2
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581
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Just drop'n in...Stressing Dr. checkups!, Necessary Time Outs!
(Preview)
Hi, Haven't been on Board for a while. Reached a crossroad in recovery where my "inner voice" was screaming at me and so was my soon to be "50" year old bod in November. Took time off from the boards, then skipped my 2 alanon meetings last week. Was able to h...
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wallsal55
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1
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688
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resentment
(Preview)
Hi everyone,
I have been doing so much thinking here lately. I have been brutaly honest with myself, and it does hurt.
I have been on this rollercoaster for so many years. Life has gotten relatively peaceful here lately. My husband is at his parents house, and unless I become willing to accept his d...
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Jeannie
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3
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628
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Should be an interesting session tonight
(Preview)
This morning my ex was looking at my son's wrist which was swollen from a dirt bike accident yesterday. I heard them discussing going to the doctor and asked if I could do anything. My ex got real angry with me and said in front of my son, "I don't want anything from you, I don't want you involved, stay out of...
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UncleLou
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1
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728
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FIRST LOIS WILSON BIOGRAPHY
(Preview)
THE LOIS WILSON STORY - WHEN LOVE IS NOT ENOUGH
Choices Recovery Bookstore will be holding a book signing and Author discussion on:
MONDAY, OCTOBER 3, 2005 at 7:00pm
404 East 87th Street (St. Joseph's Church)
between 1st Ave & York Ave, New York City
THE FIRST BIOGRAPHY OF THE GR...
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napnyc
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0
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665
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New to All This, But Yet Feel At Home!
(Preview)
Hi all. I'm writing my 1st post. Have been to a few internet meetings, which are very helpful. I would just ask for your prayers and support in my situation. I see myself in so many of you. My A of 17 years is packing as I type. We have finally decided to separate aft...
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Ratchie
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6
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651
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well he cleaned the bank out since it was closed & he took the card we now have $32.00
(Preview)
i cant believe he took out more money and left the bank with $32.00 i am so messed up right now. sometimes i feel like this is hell you know i just cant take it how am i going to survive
  
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chrissy
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9
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943
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its now 7:56 am and he did it again he never came home
(Preview)
i want to hurt him he never came home. i feel numb i only slept a few hours i am so wiped and my daughter has a game at 12. im so hungry my stomache is rumbling thats what woke me up. all i ate yesterday was frosted flakes in the morning. yeah happy 3yr anniversary we were suppo...
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chrissy
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13
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757
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Day 7 of living without my A
(Preview)
Today is day 7 of living without my husband, my a. As many of you know I left my husband last Saturday. I just felt that God wanted me out of the way so that he could get to him. I kept making excuses, pleading and begging for him to quit drinking. It was making me miserabl...
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Tammy
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9
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734
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Daily Reminder
(Preview)
Hi all!
I just read the following in an Alanon phamplet, I thought maybe someone else could benefit from sharing in the reminder. I think it speaks to AA and Alanons a like.
*Accept the fact that there is a problem with alcohol, and that you can learn to deal with it.
*Recogniz...
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Jersey
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2
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671
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Are they really having fun "out there"
(Preview)
Many of us feel that our addicts/alcoholics have it so easy. They have no responsibility, or at least don't take any,and they ae out partying or drinking all of the time. Are they really having fun? They have lucid moments and self doubt and self-loath...
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Powerless
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7
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1084
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strugging with reality
(Preview)
Few of us intentionally refused to see the reality of our lives or the circumstances in which we find ourselves. But the the truth is that most of us have indeed done so. In Alanon , we eventually come to see the many ways we had unknowlingly blocked out whole segments of our past and present. W e recognize...
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gardengal
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3
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749
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Another Night Alone
(Preview)
Thanks to everyone who responded to my post last night. It really felt good to know there are people out there everyday who have gone through what I am going through!
Well, another night alone.....While in the shower today (about 11:30 a.m.) I heard "I'll be back in a little bit". How co...
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Audrey
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8
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748
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he came home he said oh i only had 5 beers & 1 shot
(Preview)
thank you for all your kind advice & prayers.
i am so pissed i could scream.he came home late i made dinner for nobody i guess beacause nobody ate. once again i trusted him good old trustable jerk that i am. he was so sick last night and i was happy .he wasnt feeling good i mean praying to the&nb...
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chrissy
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9
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1128
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RE: never ends
(Preview)
Thank you all for responding to my post. It means so much to be able to have that support! There is so much that I don't know. The best thing I could have done is find this site.
He's in bed because he stayed out with his friends all night. I'm at the computer bawling. There is something so WRONG about this p...
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Jersey
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6
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993
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The Dilemma of the Alcoholic Marriage
(Preview)
An excerpt from the chapter on "What Manner of Communications are These?...this really struck me. (p.17)
You know that no improvement can be accomplished unless we're consistent. If we haven't the courage to speak up whe the drinker is in a sober phase, he'll just go on believing that t...
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sg
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5
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1328
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First Post..I'm sorry it's long
(Preview)
This is the first time I have posted here. I found this site a while ago and have read many posts but never had the courage to post one of my own. I have been living with an active and partially functional alcoholic up until almost a month ago when we split. My feelings have gone from loneliness to total melt...
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hadit
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5
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699
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roygbiv
(Preview)
I read your response to my post and it meant very much to me. At first, I was disappointed that that you agreed with me about being crazy and out of control. Then I realized you were agreeing with me because it was true and what I needed to hear. What meant the most to me was the fact that you had r...
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Powerless
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5
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627
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First Timer Who Is Feeling Alone
(Preview)
Wow! Tonight is the first time I've started looking for support from people who can understand what I am going through!
I began to read a few posts, and couldn't believe how some of the stories sounded so much like mine.
I am remarried (2nd marriage) for almost 4 years now. I've got thr...
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Audrey
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7
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835
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Feeling trapped and angry - sorry very long
(Preview)
Hi all
I haven’t posted on here much. Just a little background: My A is my boyfriend. He lives with me, I own the house. He is verbally abusive when he’s drunk. And it seems that he is drunk a lot lately. He’s had various surgeries in the past year or so –...
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dogscribe
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12
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809
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