Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

pinkchip · pinkchip

I was wondering what you all even define as normal drinking? I can tell you that my definition changed throught my drinking career and then now in my sobriety. When in my active alcoholism, I really thought everyone drank to get drunk. I couldn't fathom or understand any other reason for drinking bec...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for August 5 speaks about resentments. It suggests that, prior to finding Al-Anon most of our waking hours were consumed by thinking/ obsessing over our resentments and the anger that it produces.Today, although it is important to notice my feelings, we dont have to continually re...

missmeliss · missmeliss

This time last year I was in serious crisis. I mentioned here several times that I have a friend who works as an abuse counselor, who was steadfastly supporting me through that time in a really cool non-pushy way. When Abf lost his crap in our final days together and was drunk and terrifying, I went to her...

Sooverthis · Sooverthis

Good morning- I stumbled upon your page while reading up on being married to a dry drunk. A quick background: married 19 years, first several years my spouse was using, he became sober and was for 14 years. Went back out for just over a year and last Dec checked himself into rehab. Worked his program v...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Well firstly, I had my first "advanced driving" class today. It was fun! I think this is going to be some of the best money I have ever spent. Yay! In other news, Daughter is starting Japanese classes which is a) fantastic and b) going to start a war with her father. See, daughter's school does...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's One Day at a Time in Al-Anon carried great weight for me, reminding me of the impact that our expectations can have in our own lives and in those around us. The reading reminds us that when feeling frustration toward others, we often miss a common culprit: our own high or specific expectations o...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Today's reading speaks about how growing up in an alcoholic home contributed to an unhealthy inability to express anger. The writer expressed how difficult it was to show anger so instead it was stuffed down where it would grow into a serious resentment. A fear of authority f...

hotrod · hotrod

http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t60650109/alanon-step-2/

PaulF · PaulF

Maintaining contact with my alcoholic friend is an ongoing dilemma. While I am glad she contacted me and told me she loves me etc I'm still uncertain of how to proceed with keeping in contact. She is still drinking. At the moment I'm more leaving it to her to call me. I send supportive texts and always put...

RealitySucker · RealitySucker

This is probably going to be all over the place, but...I mentioned in previous posts my AH has been in the throes of his addiction for 2+ years (abusing alcohol longer than that but out of control for at least 2 years.) He has been able to obtain good jobs but has trouble keeping them, not because they've f...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2c reading for August 3rd speaks about our use of denial and about how to look into the past without staring.It suggests that when we first found Al-Anon we may have used denial as a powerful tool to help us survive and to live life.Using the program and being honest, open and willing as well a...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I had to deal with my XAH yesterday and something that the kids immediately noticed after 9 weeks of not being around them is how things have slipped back to the way it was with me. At the time I did not realize what a blessing it was that I was removed from this man's life or him from mine. Is it sad that thing...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

LOL I thought I would begin a new post because it's been so long since I shared about this. My original post was on July 10. I had an interview and was asked immediately after if I could come back the next day or day after to be introduced to the other vp for whom I'd be working if I were selected for the job. I a...

serenity47 · serenity47

My AD has been lying chronically for the past four years. Often it is about things that are of no significance but in an attempt to make herself appear better more interesting then she believes she is. She also lies about the big things to. Just this past week she is again lying about another job loss...

Lost and scared · Lost and scared

The man I have loved for two years has over 15 years of sobriety. He called off the relationship 3 times in the first year. After a solid year, he's done so again. Each time has been for seemingly small issues. He comes back but I'm not sure if this is something that common with alcoholism or is it just not go...

Tashaking18 · Tashaking18

So my father has been seeking help. He stumbled across this. "Living with an alcoholic wife" some tips and ideas to help cope. And it read this.....mind you my mother yes is an alcoholic. But she binges. So it's either every night or every few nights. Depending I what she feels deserves a dr...

hotrod · hotrod

Hi , everyone I was walking in the park this afternoon and since I always carry my camera and am ever trying to be in the "moment", I was fortunate enough to see a mother sparrow gently feeding her baby on a bench. It was a perfect reminder of how nurturing my HP is to me. Thanks for letting me sha...

hotrod · hotrod

C2C reading for August 2 speaks about our need to be in control and to force solutions. It reminds us that the Second Tradition states that for our group purpose there is one authority-- a loving God. By practicing these traditions, we enable our groups to grow and remain healthy, and ifwe insist on h...

Mirandac · Mirandac

i am still struggling can not seem to get out of my funk and misery. I have had a bad month of dealing with highly Dysfunctional people on a case.That is done for the year. I Still have a tough caseload but not with family interference. I am going to rethink my two jobs when i get sane again. Now that the...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Nah-nana-nah nana-nah nana-nah nana-naaaah! The offspring woke me at 8.50am shrieking like some kind of disgruntled spirit. "OMG MUM I WAS MEANT TO BE AT SCHOOL HALF AN HOUR AGO!!!" Now said offspring catches a bus to school so strictly speaking she doesn't require my participation to g...

stephaniej · stephaniej

Hi all! I haven't been here in quite some time...for those of you who may remember me and my story, I just wanted to give you an update. My AH and I have been married for six years. He relapsed five years ago. There has been no physical abuse in our marriage, but the emotional abuse has been intense and gru...

IZ · IZ

Five years ago I went to an Al-Anon meeting. It wasn't for me. Those people weren't like me. My daughter was just a heavy drinker. So I never went back. I mean, she is married and has 2 kids and I've never seen her drunk. Sure, she drinks a lot and her house is always a wreck and she sleeps all the time. We bic...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I know that from my experience, God is very important in my life. I know some have another name for their understanding. If someone needs to have a different understanding, I hope you are not offended by what i say. I just want to remind myself of the power of God & of prayer. Once someone gets to step 1...

Karny · Karny

This is kind of long but I need to get it all out! My husband and I got sober in 1991, together, him through in-patient treatment and me through being required to attend therapy with him as part of his treatment, which led to me realizing I am alcoholic too. Recently we've had a lot of life changes involvi...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for August 1st speaks about our motives for attending our first Al-Anon Meeting. It states that most of us do so because we're trying to learn how to get somebody to stop drinking.When we keep coming back we discover the truth that we didn't cause the alcoholism, can't control it and...

Holly09 · Holly09

After a few lousy day's last weekend and beginning of the week dealing with my A's nonsense we have had a great few day's drama free and I am grateful! I have focused on me and the kids and things have smoothed out. I know this doesn't mean that is the end of the drama however I am focused on the good that is h...

likemyheart · likemyheart

I was asked the other day, wasn't I afraid to be alone? The question threw me a little because - of all the emotions/feelings I've gone through in the past years, fear of being alone just hasn't been one of them! Fear of being alone? Fear - of being alone in my peaceful house, able to do what I choose when I ch...

PaulF · PaulF

So finally after eight weeks she called. As I thought it wasn't good. She'd been locked in a house for several days and she'd been beaten. Sounds horrific. What I'm beating myself up for was I was so preoccupied about how hurt I'd felt it was hard to be compassionate. She didn't ask for it to happen. Whe...

andromeda · andromeda

Ok, so I need some advice about how to use program here. My son is 16 and old enough to learn how to handle his dad when he is required to spend time with him. I took my son to his first Al Anon meeting tonight and we talked about his father's drinking. Turns out there were things I didn't know, which I kind o...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Happy birthday and thank you for the amazing and selfless work you do. You are my biggest inspiration and I hope you have a wonderful day!!!

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for July 31 asks that we really think about and use the slogan:"Living one day at a time". It points out that when we take one day, one moment, one task at a time and really concentrate on it a lot more gets done. The reminder suggests that when we catch ourselves feeling o...

creatvepro · creatvepro

I have been attending Al-anon meetings for about 4 months now so I still consider myself relatively new. I hear some really sad and terrifying stories in my meetings and I sit there and think "my situation was so much different". My addict (family member) is in long-term recovery now and he...

PaulF · PaulF

Apologies for my overuse of this forum!

Italylover23 · Italylover23

Hi All, I am new to Ala-non and addiction somewhat as well. My sister is in recovery for 3 years but somehow now having an AH is a whole new ballgame. I guess it's the difference with living with the addict versus not. Anyway, my AH's "secret" was just found by me. He just spent 12 days (not nearl...

rainbow · rainbow

Many times have i wanted to reach out here but not feLt brave enough or worthy enough when i can see you have your own problems to deal with and there are so few of you always giving your time and precious support to those in need and I feel guilty drawing on your energy and time when i should be able to help m...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I do have to laugh we all got home however it was something. Spent the night at the airport I could have stood up a little more and probably gotten them to cover the hotel expense however .. you know it just wasn't worth it. LOL .. plus I figured well small airlines it's not like they are all going to talk to...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

and I mean well however good grief ... I really set myself up to be my own worst enemy. Today I'm suppose to fly out and pick the kids up. I booked tickets ohhh way long ago like in June. I got to the airport just to check .. gotta love small towns I can just fly in and out at a whim Anyway .. same crazy lady I had...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for today, July 30( my birthday incidentally), speaks about making a serious commitment to our recovery and that "finding happiness" is an inside job. It points out that we often are committed to happiness and working the program but at the first sign of trouble we abandon...

Theoceancalls · Theoceancalls

Well, i havent posted in awhile, id like to say its cuz im doing ok. .Which for the most part is true. But i realize staying away isnt good. Ive taken a new job. Working in a mental health clinic ft and summers as opposed to my former school job. the environment and peopke are FAR better. . Being away from hom...

almostThere · almostThere

Yes, I'm crazy. I've known this for a long time. Crazy and mean. Not mean in my soul, but mean on the surface from a lifetime of pain. I used to practice being mean in my head. I'm a professional. When someone stepped out of line, I could make them shrivel like a spider on a hot stove. And if no one was s...

Mattie · Mattie

I am trying with all my might to use my program tools and conduct my relationships in new healthier ways - but my emotions are scared as heck. One thing I've realized is that I typically have had a partner and friends who are not very sympathetic when things are hard. My parents were pretty dismissive of...

littlelionman · littlelionman

It just hit me. I have a fair amount going on...I share custody of 2 young kids that I'm present and engaged with, I'm navigating the emotions of divorce, drafted a legal separation mostly on my own, got our house repaired and under contract (fingers crossed the sale goes through), am getting my finan...

RealitySucker · RealitySucker

Hi all, I guess what I'm trying to ask is, is an alcoholic an alcoholic before they ever start drinking, and can behaviors/thought processes that occur earlier in the alcoholic's life be a result of the disease? My AH was talking to me the other night about some thought processes and behaviors that he...

PaulF · PaulF

Ok - first meeting done. Glad I did it. Felt comfortable and had a good safe place with which to share and identify. I'll certainly keep coming back. Naturally part of this is trying to understand my own actions in the situation with her. Sometimes I feel inadequate, sometimes I feel I'm losing my san...

el-cee · el-cee

Im struggling with a newish shortcoming recently, patience. What is it and how do i get it? What tools do i need? What causes impatience?

andromeda · andromeda

I left my bf's house last night in a foul mood and I know it had nothing to do with him, but everything to do with me. He was teasing me about the fact that I needed to go home and take care of my dog instead of spending the night with him and giving me a hard time. I know he was only kidding but I felt a bit put off:...

missmeliss · missmeliss

I made it to my class today, a little late so I had to squeeze in to a seat between 2 other ladies. One of them is a lovely smiling soul that I have sat with in classes before. The other was an older lady I've not met before who gave me a really dirty look when I sat down, enough to make me wonder if I'd forgotten to...

el-cee · el-cee

...just in case you were missing me. Im not recovered yet, all better!!! Haha, i wish, still affected by alcoholism, always will be. A lifelong member of this freedom programme, i love so much. Its given me new elements of freedom. First freedom from the addiction of alcoholics and dysfunction, mise...

Helpangel · Helpangel

I kicked my ah out of the house. He has been coming to visit my daughter and is charming one minute and then whamo. He says he can only say sorry so much and that I keep nagging him and wanting him to feel bad. I have been going back and forth with him every since When I have seen him, he makes a quick face of he is s...

PaulF · PaulF

Ok. Preparing for first Al-Anon meeting tonight. All I can say is I'm looking forward to it. I feel so impotent at the moment so I'm relieved I'm facing up to some pretty unpleasant feelings. I'm glad I found this board and over the last few days they have provided me with some small comfort. It's still so...

hotrod · hotrod

The Courage to Change reading for July 29 reinforces the fact that Al-Anon is a spiritual program and not a religious one. It points out that spirituality doesn't have to imply a particular philosophy or moral code. In alanon the principle of Spirituality simply means that we believe there is a Po...

missmeliss · missmeliss

So many new things are coming into my life just lately. I blame al-anon! I'm excited today. Daughter was sick and stayed home from school. (That wasn't the exciting bit, don't worry). I couldn't concentrate on my work with her chatter and the TV playing all day so instead I had one of those days where you...

ChamHam · ChamHam

My sister and I have always been best friends. We are a year apart and are adult women. Today, she went to her first AA meeting. I'm so incredibly proud of her... I didn't really think about how far her drinking had gotten but she has always been really wild when she drinks. She has a hard time maintaining c...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

good morning everyone- today's reading talks about sponsorship. It is the story of a young person who did not have alateen available to her, so was encouraged to attend alanon. She then asked for a sponsor and the sponsor tells how much she gained in working through the steps and program with her youn...

Quakeroat · Quakeroat

thank God for life changing honesty my local meeting is helping to make me see the need daily to practice this program every day of my life. my feelings may get hurt " just for today" but I will try not to show it. i worked through hurt feelings and overcame a terrible thought I had about my hermi...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

And the insanity that goes with it. How can one person do so much damage when they have only text 3x in a 5 week period to their kids? That is a redundant question do not answer that one .. lol. Oi. So I'm trying to figure out how to keep the focus on me and what is happening currently which is a move. First...

RealitySucker · RealitySucker

I'm new to the forums. Brief intro, I've been with my A for 4 years now, married for almost 2. I didn't even begin to suspect he might have a problem with alcohol until a couple of months before we got married, and even then I thought he'd just fallen into a bad habit, so we talked about it and agreed to cut bac...

Jacklynn · Jacklynn

Hello everyone! I might be new to this forum but I am definitely not new to being the daughter of an alcoholic mother. I think I am ready to cut all ties with my mother after 18 years of dealing with her crap. Heres my story. Please advise me as I have been going back and forth with the issue of finally sa...

PaulF · PaulF

firstly - my heartfelt thanks for all the responses yesterday. I'm getting some good perspective. A question that is on my mind a lot is the best way to communicate with the addict. I'm not looking for answers - just other people's experience. I like the notion of responding and not reacting. In my own c...

PaulF · PaulF

Bear with me - this is painful In brief - I'm an alcoholic with 15 months sobriety. I met a charming woman when I was in rehab. Nothing happened when we were there but we stayed in contact when she left in January. We admitted we had feelings for each other but what I didn't know was she'd relapsed soon aft...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	What is normal drinking? (Preview) I was wondering what you all even define as normal drinking? I can tell you that my definition changed throught my drinking career and then now in my sobriety. When in my active alcoholism, I really thought everyone drank to get drunk. I couldn't fathom or understand any other reason for drinking bec...	pinkchip	23	1586	Aug 5, 2015 by Green Eyes
	C2C 8-5 (Preview) The C2C reading for August 5 speaks about resentments. It suggests that, prior to finding Al-Anon most of our waking hours were consumed by thinking/ obsessing over our resentments and the anger that it produces.Today, although it is important to notice my feelings, we dont have to continually re...	hotrod	8	705	Aug 5, 2015 by The1975jen
	Lunch. (Preview) This time last year I was in serious crisis. I mentioned here several times that I have a friend who works as an abuse counselor, who was steadfastly supporting me through that time in a really cool non-pushy way. When Abf lost his crap in our final days together and was drunk and terrifying, I went to her...	missmeliss	14	913	Aug 5, 2015 by Jen61
	Frustated, angry, living with a dry drunk spouse (Preview) Good morning- I stumbled upon your page while reading up on being married to a dry drunk. A quick background: married 19 years, first several years my spouse was using, he became sober and was for 14 years. Went back out for just over a year and last Dec checked himself into rehab. Worked his program v...	Sooverthis	8	3428	Aug 4, 2015 by RealitySucker
	This will be interesting.. (Preview) Well firstly, I had my first "advanced driving" class today. It was fun! I think this is going to be some of the best money I have ever spent. Yay! In other news, Daughter is starting Japanese classes which is a) fantastic and b) going to start a war with her father. See, daughter's school does...	missmeliss	4	828	Aug 4, 2015 by hotrod
	ODAT 8/4 Do We Expect Too Much/Specific? (Preview) Today's One Day at a Time in Al-Anon carried great weight for me, reminding me of the impact that our expectations can have in our own lives and in those around us. The reading reminds us that when feeling frustration toward others, we often miss a common culprit: our own high or specific expectations o...	Enigmatic	3	666	Aug 4, 2015 by hotrod
	Hope for Today August 4 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Today's reading speaks about how growing up in an alcoholic home contributed to an unhealthy inability to express anger. The writer expressed how difficult it was to show anger so instead it was stuffed down where it would grow into a serious resentment. A fear of authority f...	yanksfan51	8	831	Aug 4, 2015 by Debb
	Step 2 (Preview) http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t60650109/alanon-step-2/	hotrod	1	614	Aug 4, 2015 by Iamhere
	Trying to maintain contact with an active alcoholic (Preview) Maintaining contact with my alcoholic friend is an ongoing dilemma. While I am glad she contacted me and told me she loves me etc I'm still uncertain of how to proceed with keeping in contact. She is still drinking. At the moment I'm more leaving it to her to call me. I send supportive texts and always put...	PaulF	6	762	Aug 4, 2015 by PaulF
	Anger, resentment, and fear/doubt... (Preview) This is probably going to be all over the place, but...I mentioned in previous posts my AH has been in the throes of his addiction for 2+ years (abusing alcohol longer than that but out of control for at least 2 years.) He has been able to obtain good jobs but has trouble keeping them, not because they've f...	RealitySucker	5	879	Aug 4, 2015 by RealitySucker
	C2C 8-3 (Preview) The C2c reading for August 3rd speaks about our use of denial and about how to look into the past without staring.It suggests that when we first found Al-Anon we may have used denial as a powerful tool to help us survive and to live life.Using the program and being honest, open and willing as well a...	hotrod	2	622	Aug 3, 2015 by IZ
	Honeymoon is over ... (Preview) I had to deal with my XAH yesterday and something that the kids immediately noticed after 9 weeks of not being around them is how things have slipped back to the way it was with me. At the time I did not realize what a blessing it was that I was removed from this man's life or him from mine. Is it sad that thing...	SerenityRUS	2	892	Aug 3, 2015 by Iamhere
	One Drama at a Time (Preview) LOL I thought I would begin a new post because it's been so long since I shared about this. My original post was on July 10. I had an interview and was asked immediately after if I could come back the next day or day after to be introduced to the other vp for whom I'd be working if I were selected for the job. I a...	tiredtonite	6	791	Aug 3, 2015 by tiredtonite
	Constant lies (Preview) My AD has been lying chronically for the past four years. Often it is about things that are of no significance but in an attempt to make herself appear better more interesting then she believes she is. She also lies about the big things to. Just this past week she is again lying about another job loss...	serenity47	10	899	Aug 3, 2015 by serenity47
	Do I belong? (Preview) The man I have loved for two years has over 15 years of sobriety. He called off the relationship 3 times in the first year. After a solid year, he's done so again. Each time has been for seemingly small issues. He comes back but I'm not sure if this is something that common with alcoholism or is it just not go...	Lost and scared	14	1016	Aug 3, 2015 by Lost and scared
	Alcoholic mother/wife (Preview) So my father has been seeking help. He stumbled across this. "Living with an alcoholic wife" some tips and ideas to help cope. And it read this.....mind you my mother yes is an alcoholic. But she binges. So it's either every night or every few nights. Depending I what she feels deserves a dr...	Tashaking18	4	785	Aug 3, 2015 by Jazzie18
	Good evening (Preview) Hi , everyone I was walking in the park this afternoon and since I always carry my camera and am ever trying to be in the "moment", I was fortunate enough to see a mother sparrow gently feeding her baby on a bench. It was a perfect reminder of how nurturing my HP is to me. Thanks for letting me sha...	hotrod	8	803	Aug 3, 2015 by KennyFenderjazz
	C2C 8-2 (Preview) C2C reading for August 2 speaks about our need to be in control and to force solutions. It reminds us that the Second Tradition states that for our group purpose there is one authority-- a loving God. By practicing these traditions, we enable our groups to grow and remain healthy, and ifwe insist on h...	hotrod	2	708	Aug 3, 2015 by Iamhere
	Still struggling (Preview) i am still struggling can not seem to get out of my funk and misery. I have had a bad month of dealing with highly Dysfunctional people on a case.That is done for the year. I Still have a tough caseload but not with family interference. I am going to rethink my two jobs when i get sane again. Now that the...	Mirandac	16	915	Aug 2, 2015 by Mirandac
	PROGRAM!! (I got it early in the mornin' now) (Preview) Nah-nana-nah nana-nah nana-nah nana-naaaah! The offspring woke me at 8.50am shrieking like some kind of disgruntled spirit. "OMG MUM I WAS MEANT TO BE AT SCHOOL HALF AN HOUR AGO!!!" Now said offspring catches a bus to school so strictly speaking she doesn't require my participation to g...	missmeliss	4	1074	Aug 2, 2015 by Breakingfree
	It's Been a Long Time - Update (Preview) Hi all! I haven't been here in quite some time...for those of you who may remember me and my story, I just wanted to give you an update. My AH and I have been married for six years. He relapsed five years ago. There has been no physical abuse in our marriage, but the emotional abuse has been intense and gru...	stephaniej	7	782	Aug 2, 2015 by SerenityRUS
	My First Real Meeting (Preview) Five years ago I went to an Al-Anon meeting. It wasn't for me. Those people weren't like me. My daughter was just a heavy drinker. So I never went back. I mean, she is married and has 2 kids and I've never seen her drunk. Sure, she drinks a lot and her house is always a wreck and she sleeps all the time. We bic...	IZ	11	975	Aug 2, 2015 by IZ
	God never fails...just when needed He is always there. (Preview) I know that from my experience, God is very important in my life. I know some have another name for their understanding. If someone needs to have a different understanding, I hope you are not offended by what i say. I just want to remind myself of the power of God & of prayer. Once someone gets to step 1...	Hoot Nanny	4	712	Aug 2, 2015 by hotrod
	Thanks for being here (Preview) This is kind of long but I need to get it all out! My husband and I got sober in 1991, together, him through in-patient treatment and me through being required to attend therapy with him as part of his treatment, which led to me realizing I am alcoholic too. Recently we've had a lot of life changes involvi...	Karny	7	749	Aug 2, 2015 by milkwood
	C2C 8-1 (Preview) The C2C reading for August 1st speaks about our motives for attending our first Al-Anon Meeting. It states that most of us do so because we're trying to learn how to get somebody to stop drinking.When we keep coming back we discover the truth that we didn't cause the alcoholism, can't control it and...	hotrod	3	590	Aug 1, 2015 by serenity47
	A breath of fresh air! (Preview) After a few lousy day's last weekend and beginning of the week dealing with my A's nonsense we have had a great few day's drama free and I am grateful! I have focused on me and the kids and things have smoothed out. I know this doesn't mean that is the end of the drama however I am focused on the good that is h...	Holly09	4	737	Aug 1, 2015 by Debb
	No Spirit of Fear (Preview) I was asked the other day, wasn't I afraid to be alone? The question threw me a little because - of all the emotions/feelings I've gone through in the past years, fear of being alone just hasn't been one of them! Fear of being alone? Fear - of being alone in my peaceful house, able to do what I choose when I ch...	likemyheart	5	876	Aug 1, 2015 by Jerry F
	My alcoholic got back in contact (Preview) So finally after eight weeks she called. As I thought it wasn't good. She'd been locked in a house for several days and she'd been beaten. Sounds horrific. What I'm beating myself up for was I was so preoccupied about how hurt I'd felt it was hard to be compassionate. She didn't ask for it to happen. Whe...	PaulF	9	627	Aug 1, 2015 by missmeliss
	XAH drinking around our son (Preview) Ok, so I need some advice about how to use program here. My son is 16 and old enough to learn how to handle his dad when he is required to spend time with him. I took my son to his first Al Anon meeting tonight and we talked about his father's drinking. Turns out there were things I didn't know, which I kind o...	andromeda	5	524	Aug 1, 2015 by Iamhere
	Happy Birthday Betty!! (Preview) Happy birthday and thank you for the amazing and selfless work you do. You are my biggest inspiration and I hope you have a wonderful day!!!	missmeliss	22	975	Aug 1, 2015 by Quakeroat
	C2C 7 31 (Preview) The C2C reading for July 31 asks that we really think about and use the slogan:"Living one day at a time". It points out that when we take one day, one moment, one task at a time and really concentrate on it a lot more gets done. The reminder suggests that when we catch ourselves feeling o...	hotrod	8	811	Jul 31, 2015 by Debb
	New to Al-anon (Preview) I have been attending Al-anon meetings for about 4 months now so I still consider myself relatively new. I hear some really sad and terrifying stories in my meetings and I sit there and think "my situation was so much different". My addict (family member) is in long-term recovery now and he...	creatvepro	8	875	Jul 31, 2015 by creatvepro
	Thank you (Preview) Apologies for my overuse of this forum!	PaulF	5	587	Jul 31, 2015 by pinkchip
	Hi All, I am new here. (Preview) Hi All, I am new to Ala-non and addiction somewhat as well. My sister is in recovery for 3 years but somehow now having an AH is a whole new ballgame. I guess it's the difference with living with the addict versus not. Anyway, my AH's "secret" was just found by me. He just spent 12 days (not nearl...	Italylover23	7	838	Jul 31, 2015 by Jerry F
	Heart shattered (Preview) Many times have i wanted to reach out here but not feLt brave enough or worthy enough when i can see you have your own problems to deal with and there are so few of you always giving your time and precious support to those in need and I feel guilty drawing on your energy and time when i should be able to help m...	rainbow	14	951	Jul 31, 2015 by Enigmatic
	Different perspective .. (Preview) I do have to laugh we all got home however it was something. Spent the night at the airport I could have stood up a little more and probably gotten them to cover the hotel expense however .. you know it just wasn't worth it. LOL .. plus I figured well small airlines it's not like they are all going to talk to...	SerenityRUS	2	756	Jul 30, 2015 by Iamhere
	My own worst enemy .. (Preview) and I mean well however good grief ... I really set myself up to be my own worst enemy. Today I'm suppose to fly out and pick the kids up. I booked tickets ohhh way long ago like in June. I got to the airport just to check .. gotta love small towns I can just fly in and out at a whim Anyway .. same crazy lady I had...	SerenityRUS	7	826	Jul 30, 2015 by SerenityRUS
	C2C 7-30 (Preview) The C2C reading for today, July 30( my birthday incidentally), speaks about making a serious commitment to our recovery and that "finding happiness" is an inside job. It points out that we often are committed to happiness and working the program but at the first sign of trouble we abandon...	hotrod	4	664	Jul 30, 2015 by Iamhere
	havent been here in awhile. . need tlc (Preview) Well, i havent posted in awhile, id like to say its cuz im doing ok. .Which for the most part is true. But i realize staying away isnt good. Ive taken a new job. Working in a mental health clinic ft and summers as opposed to my former school job. the environment and peopke are FAR better. . Being away from hom...	Theoceancalls	5	912	Jul 30, 2015 by Debb
	A BAD Mutha - Shut your mouth! (Preview) Yes, I'm crazy. I've known this for a long time. Crazy and mean. Not mean in my soul, but mean on the surface from a lifetime of pain. I used to practice being mean in my head. I'm a professional. When someone stepped out of line, I could make them shrivel like a spider on a hot stove. And if no one was s...	almostThere	5	831	Jul 29, 2015 by missmeliss
	Oh the emotions! (Preview) I am trying with all my might to use my program tools and conduct my relationships in new healthier ways - but my emotions are scared as heck. One thing I've realized is that I typically have had a partner and friends who are not very sympathetic when things are hard. My parents were pretty dismissive of...	Mattie	17	968	Jul 29, 2015 by andromeda
	I'm so calm. (Preview) It just hit me. I have a fair amount going on...I share custody of 2 young kids that I'm present and engaged with, I'm navigating the emotions of divorce, drafted a legal separation mostly on my own, got our house repaired and under contract (fingers crossed the sale goes through), am getting my finan...	littlelionman	15	1069	Jul 29, 2015 by Yankeerose
	Does the disease affect behavior even before alcohol ever enters the picture? (Preview) Hi all, I guess what I'm trying to ask is, is an alcoholic an alcoholic before they ever start drinking, and can behaviors/thought processes that occur earlier in the alcoholic's life be a result of the disease? My AH was talking to me the other night about some thought processes and behaviors that he...	RealitySucker	7	821	Jul 29, 2015 by Jozie
	First meeting! (Preview) Ok - first meeting done. Glad I did it. Felt comfortable and had a good safe place with which to share and identify. I'll certainly keep coming back. Naturally part of this is trying to understand my own actions in the situation with her. Sometimes I feel inadequate, sometimes I feel I'm losing my san...	PaulF	4	611	Jul 29, 2015 by Jerry F
	help me get patience please, quickly.x (Preview) Im struggling with a newish shortcoming recently, patience. What is it and how do i get it? What tools do i need? What causes impatience?	el-cee	3	666	Jul 29, 2015 by hotrod
	HALT: I'm in a foul mood (Preview) I left my bf's house last night in a foul mood and I know it had nothing to do with him, but everything to do with me. He was teasing me about the fact that I needed to go home and take care of my dog instead of spending the night with him and giving me a hard time. I know he was only kidding but I felt a bit put off:...	andromeda	9	918	Jul 29, 2015 by Iamhere
	Needed all my tools today! (Preview) I made it to my class today, a little late so I had to squeeze in to a seat between 2 other ladies. One of them is a lovely smiling soul that I have sat with in classes before. The other was an older lady I've not met before who gave me a really dirty look when I sat down, enough to make me wonder if I'd forgotten to...	missmeliss	9	826	Jul 29, 2015 by Iamhere
	im still here... (Preview) ...just in case you were missing me. Im not recovered yet, all better!!! Haha, i wish, still affected by alcoholism, always will be. A lifelong member of this freedom programme, i love so much. Its given me new elements of freedom. First freedom from the addiction of alcoholics and dysfunction, mise...	el-cee	9	792	Jul 29, 2015 by el-cee
	I'm sorry from a 9 day sober ah (Preview) I kicked my ah out of the house. He has been coming to visit my daughter and is charming one minute and then whamo. He says he can only say sorry so much and that I keep nagging him and wanting him to feel bad. I have been going back and forth with him every since When I have seen him, he makes a quick face of he is s...	Helpangel	7	767	Jul 29, 2015 by maryjane
	First meeting tonight (Preview) Ok. Preparing for first Al-Anon meeting tonight. All I can say is I'm looking forward to it. I feel so impotent at the moment so I'm relieved I'm facing up to some pretty unpleasant feelings. I'm glad I found this board and over the last few days they have provided me with some small comfort. It's still so...	PaulF	5	713	Jul 29, 2015 by PaulF
	C2C 7-29 (Preview) The Courage to Change reading for July 29 reinforces the fact that Al-Anon is a spiritual program and not a religious one. It points out that spirituality doesn't have to imply a particular philosophy or moral code. In alanon the principle of Spirituality simply means that we believe there is a Po...	hotrod	2	757	Jul 29, 2015 by Debb
	Cool happenings :-) (Preview) So many new things are coming into my life just lately. I blame al-anon! I'm excited today. Daughter was sick and stayed home from school. (That wasn't the exciting bit, don't worry). I couldn't concentrate on my work with her chatter and the TV playing all day so instead I had one of those days where you...	missmeliss	8	660	Jul 29, 2015 by Sweet Stanley
	My sister went to her first meeting today... (Preview) My sister and I have always been best friends. We are a year apart and are adult women. Today, she went to her first AA meeting. I'm so incredibly proud of her... I didn't really think about how far her drinking had gotten but she has always been really wild when she drinks. She has a hard time maintaining c...	ChamHam	12	913	Jul 28, 2015 by Debb
	Hope for Today July 28 (Preview) good morning everyone- today's reading talks about sponsorship. It is the story of a young person who did not have alateen available to her, so was encouraged to attend alanon. She then asked for a sponsor and the sponsor tells how much she gained in working through the steps and program with her youn...	yanksfan51	2	665	Jul 28, 2015 by Iamhere
	I need daily therapy to keep me mentally emotionally and spiritually well (Preview) thank God for life changing honesty my local meeting is helping to make me see the need daily to practice this program every day of my life. my feelings may get hurt " just for today" but I will try not to show it. i worked through hurt feelings and overcame a terrible thought I had about my hermi...	Quakeroat	3	747	Jul 28, 2015 by Iamhere
	Trying to commuinicate with an A (Preview) And the insanity that goes with it. How can one person do so much damage when they have only text 3x in a 5 week period to their kids? That is a redundant question do not answer that one .. lol. Oi. So I'm trying to figure out how to keep the focus on me and what is happening currently which is a move. First...	SerenityRUS	5	882	Jul 28, 2015 by Iamhere
	Why do you stay with your active A? (Preview) I'm new to the forums. Brief intro, I've been with my A for 4 years now, married for almost 2. I didn't even begin to suspect he might have a problem with alcohol until a couple of months before we got married, and even then I thought he'd just fallen into a bad habit, so we talked about it and agreed to cut bac...	RealitySucker	17	906	Jul 28, 2015 by Jazzie18
	Hi, Im new here - need advice ASAP (Preview) Hello everyone! I might be new to this forum but I am definitely not new to being the daughter of an alcoholic mother. I think I am ready to cut all ties with my mother after 18 years of dealing with her crap. Heres my story. Please advise me as I have been going back and forth with the issue of finally sa...	Jacklynn	9	995	Jul 28, 2015 by Iamhere
	Communication with the addict (Preview) firstly - my heartfelt thanks for all the responses yesterday. I'm getting some good perspective. A question that is on my mind a lot is the best way to communicate with the addict. I'm not looking for answers - just other people's experience. I like the notion of responding and not reacting. In my own c...	PaulF	11	785	Jul 28, 2015 by PaulF
	First post - help! (Preview) Bear with me - this is painful In brief - I'm an alcoholic with 15 months sobriety. I met a charming woman when I was in rehab. Nothing happened when we were there but we stayed in contact when she left in January. We admitted we had feelings for each other but what I didn't know was she'd relapsed soon aft...	PaulF	15	889	Jul 28, 2015 by KennyFenderjazz
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.