Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

el-cee · el-cee

Im struggling with a newish shortcoming recently, patience. What is it and how do i get it? What tools do i need? What causes impatience?

andromeda · andromeda

I left my bf's house last night in a foul mood and I know it had nothing to do with him, but everything to do with me. He was teasing me about the fact that I needed to go home and take care of my dog instead of spending the night with him and giving me a hard time. I know he was only kidding but I felt a bit put off:...

missmeliss · missmeliss

I made it to my class today, a little late so I had to squeeze in to a seat between 2 other ladies. One of them is a lovely smiling soul that I have sat with in classes before. The other was an older lady I've not met before who gave me a really dirty look when I sat down, enough to make me wonder if I'd forgotten to...

el-cee · el-cee

...just in case you were missing me. Im not recovered yet, all better!!! Haha, i wish, still affected by alcoholism, always will be. A lifelong member of this freedom programme, i love so much. Its given me new elements of freedom. First freedom from the addiction of alcoholics and dysfunction, mise...

Helpangel · Helpangel

I kicked my ah out of the house. He has been coming to visit my daughter and is charming one minute and then whamo. He says he can only say sorry so much and that I keep nagging him and wanting him to feel bad. I have been going back and forth with him every since When I have seen him, he makes a quick face of he is s...

PaulF · PaulF

Ok. Preparing for first Al-Anon meeting tonight. All I can say is I'm looking forward to it. I feel so impotent at the moment so I'm relieved I'm facing up to some pretty unpleasant feelings. I'm glad I found this board and over the last few days they have provided me with some small comfort. It's still so...

hotrod · hotrod

The Courage to Change reading for July 29 reinforces the fact that Al-Anon is a spiritual program and not a religious one. It points out that spirituality doesn't have to imply a particular philosophy or moral code. In alanon the principle of Spirituality simply means that we believe there is a Po...

missmeliss · missmeliss

So many new things are coming into my life just lately. I blame al-anon! I'm excited today. Daughter was sick and stayed home from school. (That wasn't the exciting bit, don't worry). I couldn't concentrate on my work with her chatter and the TV playing all day so instead I had one of those days where you...

ChamHam · ChamHam

My sister and I have always been best friends. We are a year apart and are adult women. Today, she went to her first AA meeting. I'm so incredibly proud of her... I didn't really think about how far her drinking had gotten but she has always been really wild when she drinks. She has a hard time maintaining c...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

good morning everyone- today's reading talks about sponsorship. It is the story of a young person who did not have alateen available to her, so was encouraged to attend alanon. She then asked for a sponsor and the sponsor tells how much she gained in working through the steps and program with her youn...

Quakeroat · Quakeroat

thank God for life changing honesty my local meeting is helping to make me see the need daily to practice this program every day of my life. my feelings may get hurt " just for today" but I will try not to show it. i worked through hurt feelings and overcame a terrible thought I had about my hermi...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

And the insanity that goes with it. How can one person do so much damage when they have only text 3x in a 5 week period to their kids? That is a redundant question do not answer that one .. lol. Oi. So I'm trying to figure out how to keep the focus on me and what is happening currently which is a move. First...

RealitySucker · RealitySucker

I'm new to the forums. Brief intro, I've been with my A for 4 years now, married for almost 2. I didn't even begin to suspect he might have a problem with alcohol until a couple of months before we got married, and even then I thought he'd just fallen into a bad habit, so we talked about it and agreed to cut bac...

Jacklynn · Jacklynn

Hello everyone! I might be new to this forum but I am definitely not new to being the daughter of an alcoholic mother. I think I am ready to cut all ties with my mother after 18 years of dealing with her crap. Heres my story. Please advise me as I have been going back and forth with the issue of finally sa...

PaulF · PaulF

firstly - my heartfelt thanks for all the responses yesterday. I'm getting some good perspective. A question that is on my mind a lot is the best way to communicate with the addict. I'm not looking for answers - just other people's experience. I like the notion of responding and not reacting. In my own c...

PaulF · PaulF

Bear with me - this is painful In brief - I'm an alcoholic with 15 months sobriety. I met a charming woman when I was in rehab. Nothing happened when we were there but we stayed in contact when she left in January. We admitted we had feelings for each other but what I didn't know was she'd relapsed soon aft...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

Today I'm suppose to be doing the grownup thing .. I'm sort of doing that I am sending out resume's at the moment. Well, here I sit at Starbucks and I'm eaves dropping on a conversation between two very attractive women and one of them had kids. I couldn't tell at first. As a woman I am always shocked bec...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for July 27 speaks about the words from the; "Al-Anon suggested closing" This statement , is truly gold and reminds us to "let there be no gossip or criticism of one another." The reading then goes on to explain that we need to leave our judgmental attitudes at t...

almostThere · almostThere

There's a big horsefly that's been hanging around my porch. He buzzes around me every now and then, and I swat at him. He hasn't bitten me (yet). I was sitting for a minute, taking a break and working a little al-anon when he landed on the railing near me. I had my flip-flop poised to squash him. I starte...

almostThere · almostThere

1. We admitted we were powerless over alcoholthat our lives had become unmanageable. 1. We admitted we were powerless over alcoholthat our lives had become unmanageable. 1. We admitted we were powerless over alcoholthat our lives had become unmanageable. 1. We admitted we were powerless over alc...

Stevie75 · Stevie75

Hi everyone, first post from a fairly desperate guy! My wife has been drinking on and off now for three years and over the past two / three months it's been every day. I've been reading up on topics such as how I should be dealing with this, and it turns out that I've recognised that my behaviour (losing my t...

Jozie · Jozie

So Today was a Typical Over Reacted Morning from my AH, Trying My Best not to Jump on "HIS" Crazy Train...lol I went out last night with some Al-Anon Ladies, for Dinner and a Swim, and didn't get home till almost 11pm ;) I had a Wonderful time, and the fellowship was amazing ;) There was a Lady...

pinkchip · pinkchip

I am visiting in-laws this weekend. Instead of being pleasant and relaxing, it's been stressful, tense, and drama filled. There are dynamics that are so crazy it's making my head spin. It does directly relate to damage from alcoholism and fallout from former allegiences and past abuse from my husb...

Holly09 · Holly09

The insanity roller coaster was at a lul for a long time until a couple of months ago, then at a lul again until this weekend and now I'm so angry that I can't tell if it's more at him or myself! I used to have to lock up certain meds my sons adderall and any narcotics that were prescribed to anyone other than t...

Holly09 · Holly09

A couple of months ago I told my A fiance he had to leave after a really long dry spell we had a night from hell (yet again) I told him when he came back and we talked (my aspergers 11 yr old had a breakdown and ended up in the er) if he was going to live here he was going to have to be sober I wasn't living like this 12...

DistantObserver · DistantObserver

Ever since I can remember, my mom would sleep the daylight away, secluding herself to her room. I was 14 years old, sitting alone in the living room watching TV. I never thought it was abnormal that my mom wasn't involved in my life the way she should have been. I thought it was normal. I grew up without g...

Braavos · Braavos

Hello everyone. I'm new to the Al Anon forum. My husband is an alcoholic. We've been together for 7 years and married for 4 years, we also have a 16 month old son. My husband has always been a problem drinker, he always overdid it and every social event or occasion inevitably resulted in him drinking, usu...

oceanpine · oceanpine

This is a very confusing time. I have been out of my house for 2 weeks. My 10 and 12 yr old sons our at home with him. I have no idea if he is drinking but at least they are all just at home, not really going anywhere. I have had a strong desire to not be in the same house with him for at least 14 months - since he first...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Abf turned up here late Wednesday night. Surprisingly he didn't walk right in but stood on the doorstep, handed me my long-lost bag, and told me "I came to give your bag back. I'd love to come in and see you but if you don't want me here, I'll turn around and go home and no hard feelings, I'll just tell y...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for July 26 speaks about identifying illusions that can make our lives unmanageable. One of the illusions. that the meditation speaks about is that we act" as if" we have the power to control others--. once we accept. our powerlessness-as is suggested in the fir...

likemyheart · likemyheart

I wish I could bring Al-Anon to my family, certain friends. I have gotten so much good peace and contentment from having it in my life I wish I could share it with people and help them achieve it as well. Visiting my family I sat back and cringed at the way people who care about each other miscommunicated, i...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for July 25. speaks about the anger, resentments, self-pity ,and guilt that we carry about within us. prior to finding Al-Anon. The reading suggests that by working the Al-Anon program the answer became apparent--." We lacked courage to validate ourselves" If w...

mjferg · mjferg

I am a neat freak,a perfectionist and a little obsessive about my house.The first thing I do when I move into a new place is make it pretty.I can't stand clutter and chaos,it actually makes me physically anxious.The problem is I ran out of time on the house I bought and we had to move in early.So I am livin...

nightlight · nightlight

My boyfriend is a binge drinker alcoholic (as opposed to a daily drinker alcoholic, i guess). He just told me this in an email. We're on a break right now because of his drinking. We've been together for 2 years and we frequently would hang out and drink together. I would have 3 or 4 and stop, but he would ke...

Starting Again · Starting Again

It's been over a year since I have posted here but nothing much has changed. My husband is still drinking and hiding it (not very well). I have had to set some boundaries, keep the bottles in the garage away from the kids, I don't want him to ever drive with kids in the car (he's had 1 dui that he thinks is a flu...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

So I'm a bit of a wild spirit sometimes free sometimes wild sometimes both .. I did have a lovely young man tell me I was someone who was unforgettable and that got proven the other night .. LOL! I took off to St Louis the other night it was a cheap flight, I was meeting a girlfriend of mine who flew in on busine...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Briefly I will summarize my yesterday. I had a real birthday yesterday! What I really mean is an unreal birthday. I spent all day w/ my AH. We ate,shopped & saw a movie. Come to think of it my dad & step mom pretty much did the same when they could especially when I was younger. That was a side note. A...

Paradigm · Paradigm

Hello everyone, My wife who previously had an addiction problem before we met and went through the program to get clean 15 years ago started drinking a few years ago. It has slowly progressed into a serious problem and I am pretty new to understanding this and trying to get her help. With some help from h...

pinkchip · pinkchip

Well, I am going to be Clinical Director of an adult rehab after a year and a half of being director of a program for Juvenile Delinquents. Obviously a big raise but it's anxiety provoking. It is mostly just change. It is going to be a stressful transition. Short staffed where I am at and also where I am go...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

A MUST READ :The Awakening~~ The Awakening~~ A time comes in your life when you finally get it... when, in the midst of all your fears and insanity, you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the voice inside your head cries out - ENOUGH! Enough fighting and crying or struggling to hold on. And, like a ch...

Kekelle · Kekelle

My husband and I have been together since high school - 24 years. Married almost 20. Have 3 amazing kids. And he has been an alcoholic since I met him. After years of begging, pleading, threatening everything I could think of, I reached the end of my rope. I threw out one more life preserver to him an...

Flower49 · Flower49

Saturday was the last day of marriage counseling. Our counselor was incredible and awesome and no words can ever express my gratitude. I had some angst with leaving his care, but I know if I use all tools available to me, it will be just fine. Strange to think we finished because at this time last year my A...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for July 24. speaks about the 11th step--praying for the knowledge of HP's will and the power to carry it out. It suggests that doing. HP's will does not mean that we do something spectacular every day., but that we stay present in our lives . Listening to the small voice within and th...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's reading from One Day at a Time in Al-Anon asks us to consider our interactions with Newcomers to the Program. The text reminds us of what it can feel like when we first come to the program: like we are on the verge of drowning. It does not take long to benefit from the AlAnon wisdom of focusing on hea...

YARNCRAZY · YARNCRAZY

I got to always keep in mind that i have no control over my ah's alcohlism. This past week,he was appearing less drunky and appeared just to be drinking a few beers and eatting. i told him how nice it was to see him productive,aware and 'more with it' tyhis past week. oh im just drinking beer,he said with a s...

ccb223 · ccb223

Hi all. I'm hoping someone can give me a thought or perspective on this. My qualifier is my parent; she is a functional alcoholic, however lately I think her depression is getting worse. I am the child of two functioning alcoholics, though my dad committed suicide when I was a teen. It's 7 years later, a...

Helpangel · Helpangel

I couldn't hear anymore about him, I just couldn't. I know I wanted to wait till Bulls got paid but I just couldn't. I just got mad when he was talking the usual manipulation games and told him that I couldn't do it anymore. I actually told him to take his stuff and his money and go on a post it note! Yes folks I...

hotrod · hotrod

We are beginning a new round of the Steps on the Step Work BoardThe first Step has been posted Learn How The Twelve Steps Work. Please join in and share your thoughts Here is the link http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t60562974/step-one-alanon-7-2015

Jozie · Jozie

Funny how when I look back from where I started to where I am Now, I would like to think I have Moved some Mountains I think Growing up under the thumb of active alcoholics & addicts makes me someone at times I cant even understand When I got to Al-Anon almost 7yrs ago, I was Broken I Couldnt tell you wha...

PUPPY · PUPPY

I am new to this, but have been going to Al-anon meetings in my area. We haven't heard from our son since his release from a 3 months jail stent for possession of drugs. This has been going on since he was 15, he is now 30. He has stole from us, lied to us, made up stories about us; yet as his mother I kept givi...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for today, July 23 speaks about developing/ or reclaiming our sense of humor. It points out that when we first enter the rooms we have lost our ability to see the humor in life as we always seem to view it as chaotic and filled with tragedy and pain. The reading goes on to suggest that the...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hi Everyone! Things are still going well for me, and my AW is still sober and working her AA program, and I am moving closer to finding a sponsor in my face to face group. This weekend, we are going north to the small hunting shack my grandfather built. The foundation is sinking on one side, and the shack...

oceanpine · oceanpine

Last time I posted, in Feb, I was just moving out from my house. My AH had done the same bad behavior one more time - secretly drinking and then acting aggressively mean to me. I had told him that I would leave if he did that again. So I did. I haven't posted again because I did have support from friends and my...

holdemfoldem · holdemfoldem

My daughter is 26, is an alcoholic for some years now. She got clean and was staying with friends in a recovery house. She was walking the walk and talking the talk. I was looking forward to meeting up with her, (as I'd done before), at an AA meeting where she was to receive acknowledgement for staying...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I just need some positive thoughts and prayers at the moment. My mom is being extremely manipulative and wants us to come to California. All of a sudden now that she realizes we are not moving to California she's going on about how she can't really help. I was counting on her helping and this really pu...

hopefortoday29 · hopefortoday29

I've been reading the step 4 section of Paths to Recovery recently as I start my own inventory. The four words that keep coming up are love, kindness, honesty and balance. There are a couple of suggestions about using key words as the backbone of our inventory for example managing, martyrdom, manipul...

Debb · Debb

Have a wonderful day my friends! {{HUGS}}

hotrod · hotrod

The ODA T reading for July 22 speaks about the fact that it is a waste of time to attempt to understand the disease of alcoholism by studying books on the disease. It points out that most of us do this because we believe the more information we have, the better we will be able to cope with the disease and...

missmeliss · missmeliss

I worked up the nerve to text my ex, "I am not comfortable with you being in my house and I don't want it to happen again" The reply I got back was "I needed to be sure our daughter isn't living in a scene from trainspotting" Trainspotting is a 90's cult movie about heroin addicts. Odd...

sweeetr · sweeetr

So my AexH is in 1/2 way house for now and then possibly some jail time. I take care of our son, and I got his two BIG dogs, by default..... At the time I didnt mind as I knew they would continue to be neglected and not fed or watered as I was only one that did that when I realized he didnt .. He left them in horribl...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	help me get patience please, quickly.x (Preview) Im struggling with a newish shortcoming recently, patience. What is it and how do i get it? What tools do i need? What causes impatience?	el-cee	3	507	Jul 29, 2015 by hotrod
	HALT: I'm in a foul mood (Preview) I left my bf's house last night in a foul mood and I know it had nothing to do with him, but everything to do with me. He was teasing me about the fact that I needed to go home and take care of my dog instead of spending the night with him and giving me a hard time. I know he was only kidding but I felt a bit put off:...	andromeda	9	766	Jul 29, 2015 by Iamhere
	Needed all my tools today! (Preview) I made it to my class today, a little late so I had to squeeze in to a seat between 2 other ladies. One of them is a lovely smiling soul that I have sat with in classes before. The other was an older lady I've not met before who gave me a really dirty look when I sat down, enough to make me wonder if I'd forgotten to...	missmeliss	9	678	Jul 29, 2015 by Iamhere
	im still here... (Preview) ...just in case you were missing me. Im not recovered yet, all better!!! Haha, i wish, still affected by alcoholism, always will be. A lifelong member of this freedom programme, i love so much. Its given me new elements of freedom. First freedom from the addiction of alcoholics and dysfunction, mise...	el-cee	9	643	Jul 29, 2015 by el-cee
	I'm sorry from a 9 day sober ah (Preview) I kicked my ah out of the house. He has been coming to visit my daughter and is charming one minute and then whamo. He says he can only say sorry so much and that I keep nagging him and wanting him to feel bad. I have been going back and forth with him every since When I have seen him, he makes a quick face of he is s...	Helpangel	7	622	Jul 29, 2015 by maryjane
	First meeting tonight (Preview) Ok. Preparing for first Al-Anon meeting tonight. All I can say is I'm looking forward to it. I feel so impotent at the moment so I'm relieved I'm facing up to some pretty unpleasant feelings. I'm glad I found this board and over the last few days they have provided me with some small comfort. It's still so...	PaulF	5	549	Jul 29, 2015 by PaulF
	C2C 7-29 (Preview) The Courage to Change reading for July 29 reinforces the fact that Al-Anon is a spiritual program and not a religious one. It points out that spirituality doesn't have to imply a particular philosophy or moral code. In alanon the principle of Spirituality simply means that we believe there is a Po...	hotrod	2	610	Jul 29, 2015 by Debb
	Cool happenings :-) (Preview) So many new things are coming into my life just lately. I blame al-anon! I'm excited today. Daughter was sick and stayed home from school. (That wasn't the exciting bit, don't worry). I couldn't concentrate on my work with her chatter and the TV playing all day so instead I had one of those days where you...	missmeliss	8	509	Jul 29, 2015 by Sweet Stanley
	My sister went to her first meeting today... (Preview) My sister and I have always been best friends. We are a year apart and are adult women. Today, she went to her first AA meeting. I'm so incredibly proud of her... I didn't really think about how far her drinking had gotten but she has always been really wild when she drinks. She has a hard time maintaining c...	ChamHam	12	760	Jul 28, 2015 by Debb
	Hope for Today July 28 (Preview) good morning everyone- today's reading talks about sponsorship. It is the story of a young person who did not have alateen available to her, so was encouraged to attend alanon. She then asked for a sponsor and the sponsor tells how much she gained in working through the steps and program with her youn...	yanksfan51	2	511	Jul 28, 2015 by Iamhere
	I need daily therapy to keep me mentally emotionally and spiritually well (Preview) thank God for life changing honesty my local meeting is helping to make me see the need daily to practice this program every day of my life. my feelings may get hurt " just for today" but I will try not to show it. i worked through hurt feelings and overcame a terrible thought I had about my hermi...	Quakeroat	3	597	Jul 28, 2015 by Iamhere
	Trying to commuinicate with an A (Preview) And the insanity that goes with it. How can one person do so much damage when they have only text 3x in a 5 week period to their kids? That is a redundant question do not answer that one .. lol. Oi. So I'm trying to figure out how to keep the focus on me and what is happening currently which is a move. First...	SerenityRUS	5	726	Jul 28, 2015 by Iamhere
	Why do you stay with your active A? (Preview) I'm new to the forums. Brief intro, I've been with my A for 4 years now, married for almost 2. I didn't even begin to suspect he might have a problem with alcohol until a couple of months before we got married, and even then I thought he'd just fallen into a bad habit, so we talked about it and agreed to cut bac...	RealitySucker	17	723	Jul 28, 2015 by Jazzie18
	Hi, Im new here - need advice ASAP (Preview) Hello everyone! I might be new to this forum but I am definitely not new to being the daughter of an alcoholic mother. I think I am ready to cut all ties with my mother after 18 years of dealing with her crap. Heres my story. Please advise me as I have been going back and forth with the issue of finally sa...	Jacklynn	9	843	Jul 28, 2015 by Iamhere
	Communication with the addict (Preview) firstly - my heartfelt thanks for all the responses yesterday. I'm getting some good perspective. A question that is on my mind a lot is the best way to communicate with the addict. I'm not looking for answers - just other people's experience. I like the notion of responding and not reacting. In my own c...	PaulF	11	621	Jul 28, 2015 by PaulF
	First post - help! (Preview) Bear with me - this is painful In brief - I'm an alcoholic with 15 months sobriety. I met a charming woman when I was in rehab. Nothing happened when we were there but we stayed in contact when she left in January. We admitted we had feelings for each other but what I didn't know was she'd relapsed soon aft...	PaulF	15	702	Jul 28, 2015 by KennyFenderjazz
	Undervaluing me .. (Preview) Today I'm suppose to be doing the grownup thing .. I'm sort of doing that I am sending out resume's at the moment. Well, here I sit at Starbucks and I'm eaves dropping on a conversation between two very attractive women and one of them had kids. I couldn't tell at first. As a woman I am always shocked bec...	SerenityRUS	5	595	Jul 28, 2015 by SerenityRUS
	C2C 7-27 (Preview) The C2C reading for July 27 speaks about the words from the; "Al-Anon suggested closing" This statement , is truly gold and reminds us to "let there be no gossip or criticism of one another." The reading then goes on to explain that we need to leave our judgmental attitudes at t...	hotrod	7	543	Jul 28, 2015 by Quakeroat
	Dennis (Preview) There's a big horsefly that's been hanging around my porch. He buzzes around me every now and then, and I swat at him. He hasn't bitten me (yet). I was sitting for a minute, taking a break and working a little al-anon when he landed on the railing near me. I had my flip-flop poised to squash him. I starte...	almostThere	5	518	Jul 27, 2015 by Jozie
	The 8,000,000,000 Steps of Al-Anon (Preview) 1. We admitted we were powerless over alcoholthat our lives had become unmanageable. 1. We admitted we were powerless over alcoholthat our lives had become unmanageable. 1. We admitted we were powerless over alcoholthat our lives had become unmanageable. 1. We admitted we were powerless over alc...	almostThere	8	605	Jul 27, 2015 by littlelionman
	Enabling (Preview) Hi everyone, first post from a fairly desperate guy! My wife has been drinking on and off now for three years and over the past two / three months it's been every day. I've been reading up on topics such as how I should be dealing with this, and it turns out that I've recognised that my behaviour (losing my t...	Stevie75	10	744	Jul 27, 2015 by Debb
	Trying to Resist the Crazy Train... (Preview) So Today was a Typical Over Reacted Morning from my AH, Trying My Best not to Jump on "HIS" Crazy Train...lol I went out last night with some Al-Anon Ladies, for Dinner and a Swim, and didn't get home till almost 11pm ;) I had a Wonderful time, and the fellowship was amazing ;) There was a Lady...	Jozie	14	681	Jul 27, 2015 by Debb
	In-laws (Preview) I am visiting in-laws this weekend. Instead of being pleasant and relaxing, it's been stressful, tense, and drama filled. There are dynamics that are so crazy it's making my head spin. It does directly relate to damage from alcoholism and fallout from former allegiences and past abuse from my husb...	pinkchip	10	861	Jul 27, 2015 by hotrod
	The insanity roller coaster (Preview) The insanity roller coaster was at a lul for a long time until a couple of months ago, then at a lul again until this weekend and now I'm so angry that I can't tell if it's more at him or myself! I used to have to lock up certain meds my sons adderall and any narcotics that were prescribed to anyone other than t...	Holly09	6	527	Jul 27, 2015 by Jozie
	Set my boundaries and being tested (Preview) A couple of months ago I told my A fiance he had to leave after a really long dry spell we had a night from hell (yet again) I told him when he came back and we talked (my aspergers 11 yr old had a breakdown and ended up in the er) if he was going to live here he was going to have to be sober I wasn't living like this 12...	Holly09	10	848	Jul 27, 2015 by The1975jen
	How do I let go? (Preview) Ever since I can remember, my mom would sleep the daylight away, secluding herself to her room. I was 14 years old, sitting alone in the living room watching TV. I never thought it was abnormal that my mom wasn't involved in my life the way she should have been. I thought it was normal. I grew up without g...	DistantObserver	6	621	Jul 27, 2015 by Jozie
	He has relapsed. Again. (Preview) Hello everyone. I'm new to the Al Anon forum. My husband is an alcoholic. We've been together for 7 years and married for 4 years, we also have a 16 month old son. My husband has always been a problem drinker, he always overdid it and every social event or occasion inevitably resulted in him drinking, usu...	Braavos	4	567	Jul 27, 2015 by pinkchip
	He won't move out so I am (Preview) This is a very confusing time. I have been out of my house for 2 weeks. My 10 and 12 yr old sons our at home with him. I have no idea if he is drinking but at least they are all just at home, not really going anywhere. I have had a strong desire to not be in the same house with him for at least 14 months - since he first...	oceanpine	12	679	Jul 26, 2015 by a4l
	An unexpected visit. (Preview) Abf turned up here late Wednesday night. Surprisingly he didn't walk right in but stood on the doorstep, handed me my long-lost bag, and told me "I came to give your bag back. I'd love to come in and see you but if you don't want me here, I'll turn around and go home and no hard feelings, I'll just tell y...	missmeliss	3	419	Jul 26, 2015 by Debb
	C2C 7-26 (Preview) The C2C reading for July 26 speaks about identifying illusions that can make our lives unmanageable. One of the illusions. that the meditation speaks about is that we act" as if" we have the power to control others--. once we accept. our powerlessness-as is suggested in the fir...	hotrod	4	547	Jul 26, 2015 by hotrod
	I wish I could (Preview) I wish I could bring Al-Anon to my family, certain friends. I have gotten so much good peace and contentment from having it in my life I wish I could share it with people and help them achieve it as well. Visiting my family I sat back and cringed at the way people who care about each other miscommunicated, i...	likemyheart	5	606	Jul 26, 2015 by Debb
	C2C 7-25 (Preview) The C2C reading for July 25. speaks about the anger, resentments, self-pity ,and guilt that we carry about within us. prior to finding Al-Anon. The reading suggests that by working the Al-Anon program the answer became apparent--." We lacked courage to validate ourselves" If w...	hotrod	6	537	Jul 26, 2015 by catlover26
	chaos and anxiety! (Preview) I am a neat freak,a perfectionist and a little obsessive about my house.The first thing I do when I move into a new place is make it pretty.I can't stand clutter and chaos,it actually makes me physically anxious.The problem is I ran out of time on the house I bought and we had to move in early.So I am livin...	mjferg	4	496	Jul 25, 2015 by hotrod
	Newbie here. Should I stay or should I go? (Preview) My boyfriend is a binge drinker alcoholic (as opposed to a daily drinker alcoholic, i guess). He just told me this in an email. We're on a break right now because of his drinking. We've been together for 2 years and we frequently would hang out and drink together. I would have 3 or 4 and stop, but he would ke...	nightlight	13	835	Jul 25, 2015 by tiredtonite
	It never stops (Preview) It's been over a year since I have posted here but nothing much has changed. My husband is still drinking and hiding it (not very well). I have had to set some boundaries, keep the bottles in the garage away from the kids, I don't want him to ever drive with kids in the car (he's had 1 dui that he thinks is a flu...	Starting Again	11	590	Jul 25, 2015 by SerenityRUS
	Some funnies .. (Preview) So I'm a bit of a wild spirit sometimes free sometimes wild sometimes both .. I did have a lovely young man tell me I was someone who was unforgettable and that got proven the other night .. LOL! I took off to St Louis the other night it was a cheap flight, I was meeting a girlfriend of mine who flew in on busine...	SerenityRUS	3	539	Jul 24, 2015 by hotrod
	birthday fun & then some... (Preview) Briefly I will summarize my yesterday. I had a real birthday yesterday! What I really mean is an unreal birthday. I spent all day w/ my AH. We ate,shopped & saw a movie. Come to think of it my dad & step mom pretty much did the same when they could especially when I was younger. That was a side note. A...	Hoot Nanny	6	545	Jul 24, 2015 by Iamhere
	Looking for help/advice and an interventionist in the NJ area (Preview) Hello everyone, My wife who previously had an addiction problem before we met and went through the program to get clean 15 years ago started drinking a few years ago. It has slowly progressed into a serious problem and I am pretty new to understanding this and trying to get her help. With some help from h...	Paradigm	6	516	Jul 24, 2015 by Yankeerose
	New Job (Preview) Well, I am going to be Clinical Director of an adult rehab after a year and a half of being director of a program for Juvenile Delinquents. Obviously a big raise but it's anxiety provoking. It is mostly just change. It is going to be a stressful transition. Short staffed where I am at and also where I am go...	pinkchip	25	927	Jul 24, 2015 by el-cee
	The Awakening~Author unknown (Preview) A MUST READ :The Awakening~~ The Awakening~~ A time comes in your life when you finally get it... when, in the midst of all your fears and insanity, you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the voice inside your head cries out - ENOUGH! Enough fighting and crying or struggling to hold on. And, like a ch...	Breakingfree	8	709	Jul 24, 2015 by el-cee
	New to this (Preview) My husband and I have been together since high school - 24 years. Married almost 20. Have 3 amazing kids. And he has been an alcoholic since I met him. After years of begging, pleading, threatening everything I could think of, I reached the end of my rope. I threw out one more life preserver to him an...	Kekelle	11	578	Jul 24, 2015 by Debb
	Graduated Marriage Counseling (Preview) Saturday was the last day of marriage counseling. Our counselor was incredible and awesome and no words can ever express my gratitude. I had some angst with leaving his care, but I know if I use all tools available to me, it will be just fine. Strange to think we finished because at this time last year my A...	Flower49	8	699	Jul 24, 2015 by KennyFenderjazz
	C2C 7-24 (Preview) The C2C reading for July 24. speaks about the 11th step--praying for the knowledge of HP's will and the power to carry it out. It suggests that doing. HP's will does not mean that we do something spectacular every day., but that we stay present in our lives . Listening to the small voice within and th...	hotrod	3	465	Jul 24, 2015 by Debb
	ODAT 7-24 Newcomers to Al-Anon: Am I Helping or Overwhelming? (Preview) Today's reading from One Day at a Time in Al-Anon asks us to consider our interactions with Newcomers to the Program. The text reminds us of what it can feel like when we first come to the program: like we are on the verge of drowning. It does not take long to benefit from the AlAnon wisdom of focusing on hea...	Enigmatic	3	2472	Jul 24, 2015 by Debb
	i have no control (Preview) I got to always keep in mind that i have no control over my ah's alcohlism. This past week,he was appearing less drunky and appeared just to be drinking a few beers and eatting. i told him how nice it was to see him productive,aware and 'more with it' tyhis past week. oh im just drinking beer,he said with a s...	YARNCRAZY	4	537	Jul 24, 2015 by Jozie
	Emotional Blackmail (Preview) Hi all. I'm hoping someone can give me a thought or perspective on this. My qualifier is my parent; she is a functional alcoholic, however lately I think her depression is getting worse. I am the child of two functioning alcoholics, though my dad committed suicide when I was a teen. It's 7 years later, a...	ccb223	6	1024	Jul 24, 2015 by Iamhere
	I did it, he is gone! I couldn't wait another second! (Preview) I couldn't hear anymore about him, I just couldn't. I know I wanted to wait till Bulls got paid but I just couldn't. I just got mad when he was talking the usual manipulation games and told him that I couldn't do it anymore. I actually told him to take his stuff and his money and go on a post it note! Yes folks I...	Helpangel	4	688	Jul 24, 2015 by Jozie
	Step One on the Step Board (Preview) We are beginning a new round of the Steps on the Step Work BoardThe first Step has been posted Learn How The Twelve Steps Work. Please join in and share your thoughts Here is the link http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t60562974/step-one-alanon-7-2015	hotrod	2	333	Jul 24, 2015 by The1975jen
	Crazy, Tragic, Sometimes Magic, Awful Beautiful life :) (Preview) Funny how when I look back from where I started to where I am Now, I would like to think I have Moved some Mountains I think Growing up under the thumb of active alcoholics & addicts makes me someone at times I cant even understand When I got to Al-Anon almost 7yrs ago, I was Broken I Couldnt tell you wha...	Jozie	8	540	Jul 24, 2015 by Jozie
	how much detactment? (Preview) I am new to this, but have been going to Al-anon meetings in my area. We haven't heard from our son since his release from a 3 months jail stent for possession of drugs. This has been going on since he was 15, he is now 30. He has stole from us, lied to us, made up stories about us; yet as his mother I kept givi...	PUPPY	7	690	Jul 23, 2015 by Jerry F
	C2C 7-23 (Preview) The C2C reading for today, July 23 speaks about developing/ or reclaiming our sense of humor. It points out that when we first enter the rooms we have lost our ability to see the humor in life as we always seem to view it as chaotic and filled with tragedy and pain. The reading goes on to suggest that the...	hotrod	3	418	Jul 23, 2015 by Hoot Nanny
	Getting Ready for a Challenge (Preview) Hi Everyone! Things are still going well for me, and my AW is still sober and working her AA program, and I am moving closer to finding a sponsor in my face to face group. This weekend, we are going north to the small hunting shack my grandfather built. The foundation is sinking on one side, and the shack...	Skorpi	12	708	Jul 23, 2015 by Iamhere
	overwhelmed with grief today (Preview) Last time I posted, in Feb, I was just moving out from my house. My AH had done the same bad behavior one more time - secretly drinking and then acting aggressively mean to me. I had told him that I would leave if he did that again. So I did. I haven't posted again because I did have support from friends and my...	oceanpine	9	700	Jul 23, 2015 by Mirandac
	Hi, new to this forum (Preview) My daughter is 26, is an alcoholic for some years now. She got clean and was staying with friends in a recovery house. She was walking the walk and talking the talk. I was looking forward to meeting up with her, (as I'd done before), at an AA meeting where she was to receive acknowledgement for staying...	holdemfoldem	11	3508	Jul 23, 2015 by holdemfoldem
	Manipulation (Preview) I just need some positive thoughts and prayers at the moment. My mom is being extremely manipulative and wants us to come to California. All of a sudden now that she realizes we are not moving to California she's going on about how she can't really help. I was counting on her helping and this really pu...	SerenityRUS	5	686	Jul 23, 2015 by Debb
	Love, kindness, honesty and balance (Preview) I've been reading the step 4 section of Paths to Recovery recently as I start my own inventory. The four words that keep coming up are love, kindness, honesty and balance. There are a couple of suggestions about using key words as the backbone of our inventory for example managing, martyrdom, manipul...	hopefortoday29	2	627	Jul 23, 2015 by Debb
	Ultimate Detachment (Preview) Have a wonderful day my friends! {{HUGS}}	Debb	4	1033	Jul 23, 2015 by Jerry F
	ODAT 7-22 (Preview) The ODA T reading for July 22 speaks about the fact that it is a waste of time to attempt to understand the disease of alcoholism by studying books on the disease. It points out that most of us do this because we believe the more information we have, the better we will be able to cope with the disease and...	hotrod	2	419	Jul 22, 2015 by Debb
	It is written. (Preview) I worked up the nerve to text my ex, "I am not comfortable with you being in my house and I don't want it to happen again" The reply I got back was "I needed to be sure our daughter isn't living in a scene from trainspotting" Trainspotting is a 90's cult movie about heroin addicts. Odd...	missmeliss	9	700	Jul 22, 2015 by Iamhere
	Dont know what to do ...DOGS (Preview) So my AexH is in 1/2 way house for now and then possibly some jail time. I take care of our son, and I got his two BIG dogs, by default..... At the time I didnt mind as I knew they would continue to be neglected and not fed or watered as I was only one that did that when I realized he didnt .. He left them in horribl...	sweeetr	4	681	Jul 22, 2015 by Flower49
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.