Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I had to deal with my XAH yesterday and something that the kids immediately noticed after 9 weeks of not being around them is how things have slipped back to the way it was with me. At the time I did not realize what a blessing it was that I was removed from this man's life or him from mine. Is it sad that thing...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

LOL I thought I would begin a new post because it's been so long since I shared about this. My original post was on July 10. I had an interview and was asked immediately after if I could come back the next day or day after to be introduced to the other vp for whom I'd be working if I were selected for the job. I a...

serenity47 · serenity47

My AD has been lying chronically for the past four years. Often it is about things that are of no significance but in an attempt to make herself appear better more interesting then she believes she is. She also lies about the big things to. Just this past week she is again lying about another job loss...

Lost and scared · Lost and scared

The man I have loved for two years has over 15 years of sobriety. He called off the relationship 3 times in the first year. After a solid year, he's done so again. Each time has been for seemingly small issues. He comes back but I'm not sure if this is something that common with alcoholism or is it just not go...

Tashaking18 · Tashaking18

So my father has been seeking help. He stumbled across this. "Living with an alcoholic wife" some tips and ideas to help cope. And it read this.....mind you my mother yes is an alcoholic. But she binges. So it's either every night or every few nights. Depending I what she feels deserves a dr...

hotrod · hotrod

Hi , everyone I was walking in the park this afternoon and since I always carry my camera and am ever trying to be in the "moment", I was fortunate enough to see a mother sparrow gently feeding her baby on a bench. It was a perfect reminder of how nurturing my HP is to me. Thanks for letting me sha...

hotrod · hotrod

C2C reading for August 2 speaks about our need to be in control and to force solutions. It reminds us that the Second Tradition states that for our group purpose there is one authority-- a loving God. By practicing these traditions, we enable our groups to grow and remain healthy, and ifwe insist on h...

Mirandac · Mirandac

i am still struggling can not seem to get out of my funk and misery. I have had a bad month of dealing with highly Dysfunctional people on a case.That is done for the year. I Still have a tough caseload but not with family interference. I am going to rethink my two jobs when i get sane again. Now that the...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Nah-nana-nah nana-nah nana-nah nana-naaaah! The offspring woke me at 8.50am shrieking like some kind of disgruntled spirit. "OMG MUM I WAS MEANT TO BE AT SCHOOL HALF AN HOUR AGO!!!" Now said offspring catches a bus to school so strictly speaking she doesn't require my participation to g...

stephaniej · stephaniej

Hi all! I haven't been here in quite some time...for those of you who may remember me and my story, I just wanted to give you an update. My AH and I have been married for six years. He relapsed five years ago. There has been no physical abuse in our marriage, but the emotional abuse has been intense and gru...

IZ · IZ

Five years ago I went to an Al-Anon meeting. It wasn't for me. Those people weren't like me. My daughter was just a heavy drinker. So I never went back. I mean, she is married and has 2 kids and I've never seen her drunk. Sure, she drinks a lot and her house is always a wreck and she sleeps all the time. We bic...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I know that from my experience, God is very important in my life. I know some have another name for their understanding. If someone needs to have a different understanding, I hope you are not offended by what i say. I just want to remind myself of the power of God & of prayer. Once someone gets to step 1...

Karny · Karny

This is kind of long but I need to get it all out! My husband and I got sober in 1991, together, him through in-patient treatment and me through being required to attend therapy with him as part of his treatment, which led to me realizing I am alcoholic too. Recently we've had a lot of life changes involvi...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for August 1st speaks about our motives for attending our first Al-Anon Meeting. It states that most of us do so because we're trying to learn how to get somebody to stop drinking.When we keep coming back we discover the truth that we didn't cause the alcoholism, can't control it and...

Holly09 · Holly09

After a few lousy day's last weekend and beginning of the week dealing with my A's nonsense we have had a great few day's drama free and I am grateful! I have focused on me and the kids and things have smoothed out. I know this doesn't mean that is the end of the drama however I am focused on the good that is h...

likemyheart · likemyheart

I was asked the other day, wasn't I afraid to be alone? The question threw me a little because - of all the emotions/feelings I've gone through in the past years, fear of being alone just hasn't been one of them! Fear of being alone? Fear - of being alone in my peaceful house, able to do what I choose when I ch...

PaulF · PaulF

So finally after eight weeks she called. As I thought it wasn't good. She'd been locked in a house for several days and she'd been beaten. Sounds horrific. What I'm beating myself up for was I was so preoccupied about how hurt I'd felt it was hard to be compassionate. She didn't ask for it to happen. Whe...

andromeda · andromeda

Ok, so I need some advice about how to use program here. My son is 16 and old enough to learn how to handle his dad when he is required to spend time with him. I took my son to his first Al Anon meeting tonight and we talked about his father's drinking. Turns out there were things I didn't know, which I kind o...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Happy birthday and thank you for the amazing and selfless work you do. You are my biggest inspiration and I hope you have a wonderful day!!!

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for July 31 asks that we really think about and use the slogan:"Living one day at a time". It points out that when we take one day, one moment, one task at a time and really concentrate on it a lot more gets done. The reminder suggests that when we catch ourselves feeling o...

creatvepro · creatvepro

I have been attending Al-anon meetings for about 4 months now so I still consider myself relatively new. I hear some really sad and terrifying stories in my meetings and I sit there and think "my situation was so much different". My addict (family member) is in long-term recovery now and he...

PaulF · PaulF

Apologies for my overuse of this forum!

Italylover23 · Italylover23

Hi All, I am new to Ala-non and addiction somewhat as well. My sister is in recovery for 3 years but somehow now having an AH is a whole new ballgame. I guess it's the difference with living with the addict versus not. Anyway, my AH's "secret" was just found by me. He just spent 12 days (not nearl...

rainbow · rainbow

Many times have i wanted to reach out here but not feLt brave enough or worthy enough when i can see you have your own problems to deal with and there are so few of you always giving your time and precious support to those in need and I feel guilty drawing on your energy and time when i should be able to help m...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I do have to laugh we all got home however it was something. Spent the night at the airport I could have stood up a little more and probably gotten them to cover the hotel expense however .. you know it just wasn't worth it. LOL .. plus I figured well small airlines it's not like they are all going to talk to...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

and I mean well however good grief ... I really set myself up to be my own worst enemy. Today I'm suppose to fly out and pick the kids up. I booked tickets ohhh way long ago like in June. I got to the airport just to check .. gotta love small towns I can just fly in and out at a whim Anyway .. same crazy lady I had...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for today, July 30( my birthday incidentally), speaks about making a serious commitment to our recovery and that "finding happiness" is an inside job. It points out that we often are committed to happiness and working the program but at the first sign of trouble we abandon...

Theoceancalls · Theoceancalls

Well, i havent posted in awhile, id like to say its cuz im doing ok. .Which for the most part is true. But i realize staying away isnt good. Ive taken a new job. Working in a mental health clinic ft and summers as opposed to my former school job. the environment and peopke are FAR better. . Being away from hom...

almostThere · almostThere

Yes, I'm crazy. I've known this for a long time. Crazy and mean. Not mean in my soul, but mean on the surface from a lifetime of pain. I used to practice being mean in my head. I'm a professional. When someone stepped out of line, I could make them shrivel like a spider on a hot stove. And if no one was s...

Mattie · Mattie

I am trying with all my might to use my program tools and conduct my relationships in new healthier ways - but my emotions are scared as heck. One thing I've realized is that I typically have had a partner and friends who are not very sympathetic when things are hard. My parents were pretty dismissive of...

littlelionman · littlelionman

It just hit me. I have a fair amount going on...I share custody of 2 young kids that I'm present and engaged with, I'm navigating the emotions of divorce, drafted a legal separation mostly on my own, got our house repaired and under contract (fingers crossed the sale goes through), am getting my finan...

RealitySucker · RealitySucker

Hi all, I guess what I'm trying to ask is, is an alcoholic an alcoholic before they ever start drinking, and can behaviors/thought processes that occur earlier in the alcoholic's life be a result of the disease? My AH was talking to me the other night about some thought processes and behaviors that he...

PaulF · PaulF

Ok - first meeting done. Glad I did it. Felt comfortable and had a good safe place with which to share and identify. I'll certainly keep coming back. Naturally part of this is trying to understand my own actions in the situation with her. Sometimes I feel inadequate, sometimes I feel I'm losing my san...

el-cee · el-cee

Im struggling with a newish shortcoming recently, patience. What is it and how do i get it? What tools do i need? What causes impatience?

andromeda · andromeda

I left my bf's house last night in a foul mood and I know it had nothing to do with him, but everything to do with me. He was teasing me about the fact that I needed to go home and take care of my dog instead of spending the night with him and giving me a hard time. I know he was only kidding but I felt a bit put off:...

missmeliss · missmeliss

I made it to my class today, a little late so I had to squeeze in to a seat between 2 other ladies. One of them is a lovely smiling soul that I have sat with in classes before. The other was an older lady I've not met before who gave me a really dirty look when I sat down, enough to make me wonder if I'd forgotten to...

el-cee · el-cee

...just in case you were missing me. Im not recovered yet, all better!!! Haha, i wish, still affected by alcoholism, always will be. A lifelong member of this freedom programme, i love so much. Its given me new elements of freedom. First freedom from the addiction of alcoholics and dysfunction, mise...

Helpangel · Helpangel

I kicked my ah out of the house. He has been coming to visit my daughter and is charming one minute and then whamo. He says he can only say sorry so much and that I keep nagging him and wanting him to feel bad. I have been going back and forth with him every since When I have seen him, he makes a quick face of he is s...

PaulF · PaulF

Ok. Preparing for first Al-Anon meeting tonight. All I can say is I'm looking forward to it. I feel so impotent at the moment so I'm relieved I'm facing up to some pretty unpleasant feelings. I'm glad I found this board and over the last few days they have provided me with some small comfort. It's still so...

hotrod · hotrod

The Courage to Change reading for July 29 reinforces the fact that Al-Anon is a spiritual program and not a religious one. It points out that spirituality doesn't have to imply a particular philosophy or moral code. In alanon the principle of Spirituality simply means that we believe there is a Po...

missmeliss · missmeliss

So many new things are coming into my life just lately. I blame al-anon! I'm excited today. Daughter was sick and stayed home from school. (That wasn't the exciting bit, don't worry). I couldn't concentrate on my work with her chatter and the TV playing all day so instead I had one of those days where you...

ChamHam · ChamHam

My sister and I have always been best friends. We are a year apart and are adult women. Today, she went to her first AA meeting. I'm so incredibly proud of her... I didn't really think about how far her drinking had gotten but she has always been really wild when she drinks. She has a hard time maintaining c...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

good morning everyone- today's reading talks about sponsorship. It is the story of a young person who did not have alateen available to her, so was encouraged to attend alanon. She then asked for a sponsor and the sponsor tells how much she gained in working through the steps and program with her youn...

Quakeroat · Quakeroat

thank God for life changing honesty my local meeting is helping to make me see the need daily to practice this program every day of my life. my feelings may get hurt " just for today" but I will try not to show it. i worked through hurt feelings and overcame a terrible thought I had about my hermi...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

And the insanity that goes with it. How can one person do so much damage when they have only text 3x in a 5 week period to their kids? That is a redundant question do not answer that one .. lol. Oi. So I'm trying to figure out how to keep the focus on me and what is happening currently which is a move. First...

RealitySucker · RealitySucker

I'm new to the forums. Brief intro, I've been with my A for 4 years now, married for almost 2. I didn't even begin to suspect he might have a problem with alcohol until a couple of months before we got married, and even then I thought he'd just fallen into a bad habit, so we talked about it and agreed to cut bac...

Jacklynn · Jacklynn

Hello everyone! I might be new to this forum but I am definitely not new to being the daughter of an alcoholic mother. I think I am ready to cut all ties with my mother after 18 years of dealing with her crap. Heres my story. Please advise me as I have been going back and forth with the issue of finally sa...

PaulF · PaulF

firstly - my heartfelt thanks for all the responses yesterday. I'm getting some good perspective. A question that is on my mind a lot is the best way to communicate with the addict. I'm not looking for answers - just other people's experience. I like the notion of responding and not reacting. In my own c...

PaulF · PaulF

Bear with me - this is painful In brief - I'm an alcoholic with 15 months sobriety. I met a charming woman when I was in rehab. Nothing happened when we were there but we stayed in contact when she left in January. We admitted we had feelings for each other but what I didn't know was she'd relapsed soon aft...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

Today I'm suppose to be doing the grownup thing .. I'm sort of doing that I am sending out resume's at the moment. Well, here I sit at Starbucks and I'm eaves dropping on a conversation between two very attractive women and one of them had kids. I couldn't tell at first. As a woman I am always shocked bec...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for July 27 speaks about the words from the; "Al-Anon suggested closing" This statement , is truly gold and reminds us to "let there be no gossip or criticism of one another." The reading then goes on to explain that we need to leave our judgmental attitudes at t...

almostThere · almostThere

There's a big horsefly that's been hanging around my porch. He buzzes around me every now and then, and I swat at him. He hasn't bitten me (yet). I was sitting for a minute, taking a break and working a little al-anon when he landed on the railing near me. I had my flip-flop poised to squash him. I starte...

almostThere · almostThere

1. We admitted we were powerless over alcoholthat our lives had become unmanageable. 1. We admitted we were powerless over alcoholthat our lives had become unmanageable. 1. We admitted we were powerless over alcoholthat our lives had become unmanageable. 1. We admitted we were powerless over alc...

Stevie75 · Stevie75

Hi everyone, first post from a fairly desperate guy! My wife has been drinking on and off now for three years and over the past two / three months it's been every day. I've been reading up on topics such as how I should be dealing with this, and it turns out that I've recognised that my behaviour (losing my t...

Jozie · Jozie

So Today was a Typical Over Reacted Morning from my AH, Trying My Best not to Jump on "HIS" Crazy Train...lol I went out last night with some Al-Anon Ladies, for Dinner and a Swim, and didn't get home till almost 11pm ;) I had a Wonderful time, and the fellowship was amazing ;) There was a Lady...

pinkchip · pinkchip

I am visiting in-laws this weekend. Instead of being pleasant and relaxing, it's been stressful, tense, and drama filled. There are dynamics that are so crazy it's making my head spin. It does directly relate to damage from alcoholism and fallout from former allegiences and past abuse from my husb...

Holly09 · Holly09

The insanity roller coaster was at a lul for a long time until a couple of months ago, then at a lul again until this weekend and now I'm so angry that I can't tell if it's more at him or myself! I used to have to lock up certain meds my sons adderall and any narcotics that were prescribed to anyone other than t...

Holly09 · Holly09

A couple of months ago I told my A fiance he had to leave after a really long dry spell we had a night from hell (yet again) I told him when he came back and we talked (my aspergers 11 yr old had a breakdown and ended up in the er) if he was going to live here he was going to have to be sober I wasn't living like this 12...

DistantObserver · DistantObserver

Ever since I can remember, my mom would sleep the daylight away, secluding herself to her room. I was 14 years old, sitting alone in the living room watching TV. I never thought it was abnormal that my mom wasn't involved in my life the way she should have been. I thought it was normal. I grew up without g...

Braavos · Braavos

Hello everyone. I'm new to the Al Anon forum. My husband is an alcoholic. We've been together for 7 years and married for 4 years, we also have a 16 month old son. My husband has always been a problem drinker, he always overdid it and every social event or occasion inevitably resulted in him drinking, usu...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Honeymoon is over ... (Preview) I had to deal with my XAH yesterday and something that the kids immediately noticed after 9 weeks of not being around them is how things have slipped back to the way it was with me. At the time I did not realize what a blessing it was that I was removed from this man's life or him from mine. Is it sad that thing...	SerenityRUS	2	865	Aug 3, 2015 by Iamhere
	One Drama at a Time (Preview) LOL I thought I would begin a new post because it's been so long since I shared about this. My original post was on July 10. I had an interview and was asked immediately after if I could come back the next day or day after to be introduced to the other vp for whom I'd be working if I were selected for the job. I a...	tiredtonite	6	764	Aug 3, 2015 by tiredtonite
	Constant lies (Preview) My AD has been lying chronically for the past four years. Often it is about things that are of no significance but in an attempt to make herself appear better more interesting then she believes she is. She also lies about the big things to. Just this past week she is again lying about another job loss...	serenity47	10	869	Aug 3, 2015 by serenity47
	Do I belong? (Preview) The man I have loved for two years has over 15 years of sobriety. He called off the relationship 3 times in the first year. After a solid year, he's done so again. Each time has been for seemingly small issues. He comes back but I'm not sure if this is something that common with alcoholism or is it just not go...	Lost and scared	14	987	Aug 3, 2015 by Lost and scared
	Alcoholic mother/wife (Preview) So my father has been seeking help. He stumbled across this. "Living with an alcoholic wife" some tips and ideas to help cope. And it read this.....mind you my mother yes is an alcoholic. But she binges. So it's either every night or every few nights. Depending I what she feels deserves a dr...	Tashaking18	4	750	Aug 3, 2015 by Jazzie18
	Good evening (Preview) Hi , everyone I was walking in the park this afternoon and since I always carry my camera and am ever trying to be in the "moment", I was fortunate enough to see a mother sparrow gently feeding her baby on a bench. It was a perfect reminder of how nurturing my HP is to me. Thanks for letting me sha...	hotrod	8	779	Aug 3, 2015 by KennyFenderjazz
	C2C 8-2 (Preview) C2C reading for August 2 speaks about our need to be in control and to force solutions. It reminds us that the Second Tradition states that for our group purpose there is one authority-- a loving God. By practicing these traditions, we enable our groups to grow and remain healthy, and ifwe insist on h...	hotrod	2	673	Aug 3, 2015 by Iamhere
	Still struggling (Preview) i am still struggling can not seem to get out of my funk and misery. I have had a bad month of dealing with highly Dysfunctional people on a case.That is done for the year. I Still have a tough caseload but not with family interference. I am going to rethink my two jobs when i get sane again. Now that the...	Mirandac	16	890	Aug 2, 2015 by Mirandac
	PROGRAM!! (I got it early in the mornin' now) (Preview) Nah-nana-nah nana-nah nana-nah nana-naaaah! The offspring woke me at 8.50am shrieking like some kind of disgruntled spirit. "OMG MUM I WAS MEANT TO BE AT SCHOOL HALF AN HOUR AGO!!!" Now said offspring catches a bus to school so strictly speaking she doesn't require my participation to g...	missmeliss	4	1044	Aug 2, 2015 by Breakingfree
	It's Been a Long Time - Update (Preview) Hi all! I haven't been here in quite some time...for those of you who may remember me and my story, I just wanted to give you an update. My AH and I have been married for six years. He relapsed five years ago. There has been no physical abuse in our marriage, but the emotional abuse has been intense and gru...	stephaniej	7	752	Aug 2, 2015 by SerenityRUS
	My First Real Meeting (Preview) Five years ago I went to an Al-Anon meeting. It wasn't for me. Those people weren't like me. My daughter was just a heavy drinker. So I never went back. I mean, she is married and has 2 kids and I've never seen her drunk. Sure, she drinks a lot and her house is always a wreck and she sleeps all the time. We bic...	IZ	11	949	Aug 2, 2015 by IZ
	God never fails...just when needed He is always there. (Preview) I know that from my experience, God is very important in my life. I know some have another name for their understanding. If someone needs to have a different understanding, I hope you are not offended by what i say. I just want to remind myself of the power of God & of prayer. Once someone gets to step 1...	Hoot Nanny	4	684	Aug 2, 2015 by hotrod
	Thanks for being here (Preview) This is kind of long but I need to get it all out! My husband and I got sober in 1991, together, him through in-patient treatment and me through being required to attend therapy with him as part of his treatment, which led to me realizing I am alcoholic too. Recently we've had a lot of life changes involvi...	Karny	7	718	Aug 2, 2015 by milkwood
	C2C 8-1 (Preview) The C2C reading for August 1st speaks about our motives for attending our first Al-Anon Meeting. It states that most of us do so because we're trying to learn how to get somebody to stop drinking.When we keep coming back we discover the truth that we didn't cause the alcoholism, can't control it and...	hotrod	3	566	Aug 1, 2015 by serenity47
	A breath of fresh air! (Preview) After a few lousy day's last weekend and beginning of the week dealing with my A's nonsense we have had a great few day's drama free and I am grateful! I have focused on me and the kids and things have smoothed out. I know this doesn't mean that is the end of the drama however I am focused on the good that is h...	Holly09	4	707	Aug 1, 2015 by Debb
	No Spirit of Fear (Preview) I was asked the other day, wasn't I afraid to be alone? The question threw me a little because - of all the emotions/feelings I've gone through in the past years, fear of being alone just hasn't been one of them! Fear of being alone? Fear - of being alone in my peaceful house, able to do what I choose when I ch...	likemyheart	5	824	Aug 1, 2015 by Jerry F
	My alcoholic got back in contact (Preview) So finally after eight weeks she called. As I thought it wasn't good. She'd been locked in a house for several days and she'd been beaten. Sounds horrific. What I'm beating myself up for was I was so preoccupied about how hurt I'd felt it was hard to be compassionate. She didn't ask for it to happen. Whe...	PaulF	9	599	Aug 1, 2015 by missmeliss
	XAH drinking around our son (Preview) Ok, so I need some advice about how to use program here. My son is 16 and old enough to learn how to handle his dad when he is required to spend time with him. I took my son to his first Al Anon meeting tonight and we talked about his father's drinking. Turns out there were things I didn't know, which I kind o...	andromeda	5	491	Aug 1, 2015 by Iamhere
	Happy Birthday Betty!! (Preview) Happy birthday and thank you for the amazing and selfless work you do. You are my biggest inspiration and I hope you have a wonderful day!!!	missmeliss	22	945	Aug 1, 2015 by Quakeroat
	C2C 7 31 (Preview) The C2C reading for July 31 asks that we really think about and use the slogan:"Living one day at a time". It points out that when we take one day, one moment, one task at a time and really concentrate on it a lot more gets done. The reminder suggests that when we catch ourselves feeling o...	hotrod	8	786	Jul 31, 2015 by Debb
	New to Al-anon (Preview) I have been attending Al-anon meetings for about 4 months now so I still consider myself relatively new. I hear some really sad and terrifying stories in my meetings and I sit there and think "my situation was so much different". My addict (family member) is in long-term recovery now and he...	creatvepro	8	844	Jul 31, 2015 by creatvepro
	Thank you (Preview) Apologies for my overuse of this forum!	PaulF	5	566	Jul 31, 2015 by pinkchip
	Hi All, I am new here. (Preview) Hi All, I am new to Ala-non and addiction somewhat as well. My sister is in recovery for 3 years but somehow now having an AH is a whole new ballgame. I guess it's the difference with living with the addict versus not. Anyway, my AH's "secret" was just found by me. He just spent 12 days (not nearl...	Italylover23	7	806	Jul 31, 2015 by Jerry F
	Heart shattered (Preview) Many times have i wanted to reach out here but not feLt brave enough or worthy enough when i can see you have your own problems to deal with and there are so few of you always giving your time and precious support to those in need and I feel guilty drawing on your energy and time when i should be able to help m...	rainbow	14	924	Jul 31, 2015 by Enigmatic
	Different perspective .. (Preview) I do have to laugh we all got home however it was something. Spent the night at the airport I could have stood up a little more and probably gotten them to cover the hotel expense however .. you know it just wasn't worth it. LOL .. plus I figured well small airlines it's not like they are all going to talk to...	SerenityRUS	2	733	Jul 30, 2015 by Iamhere
	My own worst enemy .. (Preview) and I mean well however good grief ... I really set myself up to be my own worst enemy. Today I'm suppose to fly out and pick the kids up. I booked tickets ohhh way long ago like in June. I got to the airport just to check .. gotta love small towns I can just fly in and out at a whim Anyway .. same crazy lady I had...	SerenityRUS	7	796	Jul 30, 2015 by SerenityRUS
	C2C 7-30 (Preview) The C2C reading for today, July 30( my birthday incidentally), speaks about making a serious commitment to our recovery and that "finding happiness" is an inside job. It points out that we often are committed to happiness and working the program but at the first sign of trouble we abandon...	hotrod	4	636	Jul 30, 2015 by Iamhere
	havent been here in awhile. . need tlc (Preview) Well, i havent posted in awhile, id like to say its cuz im doing ok. .Which for the most part is true. But i realize staying away isnt good. Ive taken a new job. Working in a mental health clinic ft and summers as opposed to my former school job. the environment and peopke are FAR better. . Being away from hom...	Theoceancalls	5	875	Jul 30, 2015 by Debb
	A BAD Mutha - Shut your mouth! (Preview) Yes, I'm crazy. I've known this for a long time. Crazy and mean. Not mean in my soul, but mean on the surface from a lifetime of pain. I used to practice being mean in my head. I'm a professional. When someone stepped out of line, I could make them shrivel like a spider on a hot stove. And if no one was s...	almostThere	5	803	Jul 29, 2015 by missmeliss
	Oh the emotions! (Preview) I am trying with all my might to use my program tools and conduct my relationships in new healthier ways - but my emotions are scared as heck. One thing I've realized is that I typically have had a partner and friends who are not very sympathetic when things are hard. My parents were pretty dismissive of...	Mattie	17	939	Jul 29, 2015 by andromeda
	I'm so calm. (Preview) It just hit me. I have a fair amount going on...I share custody of 2 young kids that I'm present and engaged with, I'm navigating the emotions of divorce, drafted a legal separation mostly on my own, got our house repaired and under contract (fingers crossed the sale goes through), am getting my finan...	littlelionman	15	1039	Jul 29, 2015 by Yankeerose
	Does the disease affect behavior even before alcohol ever enters the picture? (Preview) Hi all, I guess what I'm trying to ask is, is an alcoholic an alcoholic before they ever start drinking, and can behaviors/thought processes that occur earlier in the alcoholic's life be a result of the disease? My AH was talking to me the other night about some thought processes and behaviors that he...	RealitySucker	7	791	Jul 29, 2015 by Jozie
	First meeting! (Preview) Ok - first meeting done. Glad I did it. Felt comfortable and had a good safe place with which to share and identify. I'll certainly keep coming back. Naturally part of this is trying to understand my own actions in the situation with her. Sometimes I feel inadequate, sometimes I feel I'm losing my san...	PaulF	4	581	Jul 29, 2015 by Jerry F
	help me get patience please, quickly.x (Preview) Im struggling with a newish shortcoming recently, patience. What is it and how do i get it? What tools do i need? What causes impatience?	el-cee	3	633	Jul 29, 2015 by hotrod
	HALT: I'm in a foul mood (Preview) I left my bf's house last night in a foul mood and I know it had nothing to do with him, but everything to do with me. He was teasing me about the fact that I needed to go home and take care of my dog instead of spending the night with him and giving me a hard time. I know he was only kidding but I felt a bit put off:...	andromeda	9	888	Jul 29, 2015 by Iamhere
	Needed all my tools today! (Preview) I made it to my class today, a little late so I had to squeeze in to a seat between 2 other ladies. One of them is a lovely smiling soul that I have sat with in classes before. The other was an older lady I've not met before who gave me a really dirty look when I sat down, enough to make me wonder if I'd forgotten to...	missmeliss	9	797	Jul 29, 2015 by Iamhere
	im still here... (Preview) ...just in case you were missing me. Im not recovered yet, all better!!! Haha, i wish, still affected by alcoholism, always will be. A lifelong member of this freedom programme, i love so much. Its given me new elements of freedom. First freedom from the addiction of alcoholics and dysfunction, mise...	el-cee	9	764	Jul 29, 2015 by el-cee
	I'm sorry from a 9 day sober ah (Preview) I kicked my ah out of the house. He has been coming to visit my daughter and is charming one minute and then whamo. He says he can only say sorry so much and that I keep nagging him and wanting him to feel bad. I have been going back and forth with him every since When I have seen him, he makes a quick face of he is s...	Helpangel	7	739	Jul 29, 2015 by maryjane
	First meeting tonight (Preview) Ok. Preparing for first Al-Anon meeting tonight. All I can say is I'm looking forward to it. I feel so impotent at the moment so I'm relieved I'm facing up to some pretty unpleasant feelings. I'm glad I found this board and over the last few days they have provided me with some small comfort. It's still so...	PaulF	5	670	Jul 29, 2015 by PaulF
	C2C 7-29 (Preview) The Courage to Change reading for July 29 reinforces the fact that Al-Anon is a spiritual program and not a religious one. It points out that spirituality doesn't have to imply a particular philosophy or moral code. In alanon the principle of Spirituality simply means that we believe there is a Po...	hotrod	2	730	Jul 29, 2015 by Debb
	Cool happenings :-) (Preview) So many new things are coming into my life just lately. I blame al-anon! I'm excited today. Daughter was sick and stayed home from school. (That wasn't the exciting bit, don't worry). I couldn't concentrate on my work with her chatter and the TV playing all day so instead I had one of those days where you...	missmeliss	8	632	Jul 29, 2015 by Sweet Stanley
	My sister went to her first meeting today... (Preview) My sister and I have always been best friends. We are a year apart and are adult women. Today, she went to her first AA meeting. I'm so incredibly proud of her... I didn't really think about how far her drinking had gotten but she has always been really wild when she drinks. She has a hard time maintaining c...	ChamHam	12	884	Jul 28, 2015 by Debb
	Hope for Today July 28 (Preview) good morning everyone- today's reading talks about sponsorship. It is the story of a young person who did not have alateen available to her, so was encouraged to attend alanon. She then asked for a sponsor and the sponsor tells how much she gained in working through the steps and program with her youn...	yanksfan51	2	633	Jul 28, 2015 by Iamhere
	I need daily therapy to keep me mentally emotionally and spiritually well (Preview) thank God for life changing honesty my local meeting is helping to make me see the need daily to practice this program every day of my life. my feelings may get hurt " just for today" but I will try not to show it. i worked through hurt feelings and overcame a terrible thought I had about my hermi...	Quakeroat	3	717	Jul 28, 2015 by Iamhere
	Trying to commuinicate with an A (Preview) And the insanity that goes with it. How can one person do so much damage when they have only text 3x in a 5 week period to their kids? That is a redundant question do not answer that one .. lol. Oi. So I'm trying to figure out how to keep the focus on me and what is happening currently which is a move. First...	SerenityRUS	5	852	Jul 28, 2015 by Iamhere
	Why do you stay with your active A? (Preview) I'm new to the forums. Brief intro, I've been with my A for 4 years now, married for almost 2. I didn't even begin to suspect he might have a problem with alcohol until a couple of months before we got married, and even then I thought he'd just fallen into a bad habit, so we talked about it and agreed to cut bac...	RealitySucker	17	872	Jul 28, 2015 by Jazzie18
	Hi, Im new here - need advice ASAP (Preview) Hello everyone! I might be new to this forum but I am definitely not new to being the daughter of an alcoholic mother. I think I am ready to cut all ties with my mother after 18 years of dealing with her crap. Heres my story. Please advise me as I have been going back and forth with the issue of finally sa...	Jacklynn	9	966	Jul 28, 2015 by Iamhere
	Communication with the addict (Preview) firstly - my heartfelt thanks for all the responses yesterday. I'm getting some good perspective. A question that is on my mind a lot is the best way to communicate with the addict. I'm not looking for answers - just other people's experience. I like the notion of responding and not reacting. In my own c...	PaulF	11	753	Jul 28, 2015 by PaulF
	First post - help! (Preview) Bear with me - this is painful In brief - I'm an alcoholic with 15 months sobriety. I met a charming woman when I was in rehab. Nothing happened when we were there but we stayed in contact when she left in January. We admitted we had feelings for each other but what I didn't know was she'd relapsed soon aft...	PaulF	15	838	Jul 28, 2015 by KennyFenderjazz
	Undervaluing me .. (Preview) Today I'm suppose to be doing the grownup thing .. I'm sort of doing that I am sending out resume's at the moment. Well, here I sit at Starbucks and I'm eaves dropping on a conversation between two very attractive women and one of them had kids. I couldn't tell at first. As a woman I am always shocked bec...	SerenityRUS	5	711	Jul 28, 2015 by SerenityRUS
	C2C 7-27 (Preview) The C2C reading for July 27 speaks about the words from the; "Al-Anon suggested closing" This statement , is truly gold and reminds us to "let there be no gossip or criticism of one another." The reading then goes on to explain that we need to leave our judgmental attitudes at t...	hotrod	7	670	Jul 28, 2015 by Quakeroat
	Dennis (Preview) There's a big horsefly that's been hanging around my porch. He buzzes around me every now and then, and I swat at him. He hasn't bitten me (yet). I was sitting for a minute, taking a break and working a little al-anon when he landed on the railing near me. I had my flip-flop poised to squash him. I starte...	almostThere	5	638	Jul 27, 2015 by Jozie
	The 8,000,000,000 Steps of Al-Anon (Preview) 1. We admitted we were powerless over alcoholthat our lives had become unmanageable. 1. We admitted we were powerless over alcoholthat our lives had become unmanageable. 1. We admitted we were powerless over alcoholthat our lives had become unmanageable. 1. We admitted we were powerless over alc...	almostThere	8	735	Jul 27, 2015 by littlelionman
	Enabling (Preview) Hi everyone, first post from a fairly desperate guy! My wife has been drinking on and off now for three years and over the past two / three months it's been every day. I've been reading up on topics such as how I should be dealing with this, and it turns out that I've recognised that my behaviour (losing my t...	Stevie75	10	885	Jul 27, 2015 by Debb
	Trying to Resist the Crazy Train... (Preview) So Today was a Typical Over Reacted Morning from my AH, Trying My Best not to Jump on "HIS" Crazy Train...lol I went out last night with some Al-Anon Ladies, for Dinner and a Swim, and didn't get home till almost 11pm ;) I had a Wonderful time, and the fellowship was amazing ;) There was a Lady...	Jozie	14	801	Jul 27, 2015 by Debb
	In-laws (Preview) I am visiting in-laws this weekend. Instead of being pleasant and relaxing, it's been stressful, tense, and drama filled. There are dynamics that are so crazy it's making my head spin. It does directly relate to damage from alcoholism and fallout from former allegiences and past abuse from my husb...	pinkchip	10	1054	Jul 27, 2015 by hotrod
	The insanity roller coaster (Preview) The insanity roller coaster was at a lul for a long time until a couple of months ago, then at a lul again until this weekend and now I'm so angry that I can't tell if it's more at him or myself! I used to have to lock up certain meds my sons adderall and any narcotics that were prescribed to anyone other than t...	Holly09	6	645	Jul 27, 2015 by Jozie
	Set my boundaries and being tested (Preview) A couple of months ago I told my A fiance he had to leave after a really long dry spell we had a night from hell (yet again) I told him when he came back and we talked (my aspergers 11 yr old had a breakdown and ended up in the er) if he was going to live here he was going to have to be sober I wasn't living like this 12...	Holly09	10	971	Jul 27, 2015 by The1975jen
	How do I let go? (Preview) Ever since I can remember, my mom would sleep the daylight away, secluding herself to her room. I was 14 years old, sitting alone in the living room watching TV. I never thought it was abnormal that my mom wasn't involved in my life the way she should have been. I thought it was normal. I grew up without g...	DistantObserver	6	764	Jul 27, 2015 by Jozie
	He has relapsed. Again. (Preview) Hello everyone. I'm new to the Al Anon forum. My husband is an alcoholic. We've been together for 7 years and married for 4 years, we also have a 16 month old son. My husband has always been a problem drinker, he always overdid it and every social event or occasion inevitably resulted in him drinking, usu...	Braavos	4	695	Jul 27, 2015 by pinkchip
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.