Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

sunmustshine · sunmustshine

I've been doing well in recovery as has AH. He's had a few slips. I've established a boundary of not being able to be in the relationship if he drinks. How do I draw the line? Slips I've read are a part of recovery. I know Alcoholism is unmanageable. It will get worse if the past is an indicator. Is this where...

Dinner · Dinner

hello first time at alanon. My husband has been an AH since 2008. He has barely worked in that time only my income. He has spent so much on alcohol and he has a spending problem in general. I have worked so hard all these years to move up in my job to make more money to support everyone. I have three teenagers...

Ina · Ina

Hello I am extraordinary frustrated and can cry oceans and seas combined. I have a live in B.F. he has 3 kids in late teens that do not reside with us, however, my 2 special needs do. He is a functional alcoholic and gets very hot tempered when he drinks. He doesnt have to even be drunk when he begins his rant...

tealfighter · tealfighter

So when my qualifier and I were close we used to fly remote control airplanes together. I miss it. I also realize some of my insaine behaviour while a part of the group. I would like to fly again. I however feel shunned by some in the group. Of course my mom does not want me to fly again because she doesn't wan...

MissM · MissM

Today's c2c discusses the difficulties many of us face when trying to make decisions. Many of us that have lived in alcoholic chaos dread and avoid making decisions for fear that no matter what we decide, the consequences will be something we must "suffer". We also may perceive that there is a single "...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Good morning all and sorry for the late post of a daily reading! I've had little people spend the night again and it certainly changes up my routine. As I've heard - better late than never! The reading discusses how many of us show up to Al-Anon obsessively focused on our alcoholic. We want the secret...

Lana · Lana

I don't know what to do. My relationship with my adult alcoholic daughter, who lives several thousand miles away is in such bad shape. We talked yesterday because my husband is sick and needs one or possibly two surgeries. I could tell she was drunk and missed work again. This happened after a several d...

LoveNHope · LoveNHope

I've posted on here a couple of times about my issue, and those of you who responded- your thoughts were very helpful to me. My AH, sober for over 1 yr who relapsed 2 mos from us having our first child, is still drinking and has not stopped. I left the house and am staying with my mother in law (his mom). His...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I am working really hard to stay out of the co-dependent stuff relationship wise. If I had a choice in relationships what I want is an interdependent relationship something where we share a common goal rooted together however thrive independently of one another. Without the insecure issues of sel...

WestMan · WestMan

It's 2am and I slept about two hours. I'm so over this BS right now. Yesterday was a bit of a breaking point. I'm ready to throw in the towel on this marriage, my career and myself. I have so little support. I'm actively being undermined by people at work who are supposed to be helping me on a serious project...

Wilady8 · Wilady8

My fiancé of 2 years told me tonight that he is planning on moving out. I have been in recovery (al-anon) for one month and I feel like there is hope for me as a person as well as our relationship since joining Al-anon, going to meetings, and getting a sponsor. But now he says he is planning on moving out of ou...

Mcat54 · Mcat54

I'm happy I got divorced but still mad about the money I had to give my ex. I lived in small places and drove old cars to save for retirement as a single mom and put my daughter through college. He got the house and $100k from my IRA. I get to be divorced. In the long run I know I'll be fine financially, and that...

runi · runi

A relative with family 3 kids, moved in with my us. Idea was to help both families. For the most part it is good. But, a big but. Ive been thinking and praying over this for about 2 months. I go to 2-3 meetings per week, working hard to take care of myself, (self care so foreign for me). Any input ?? Wha...

Aerin · Aerin

In response to a lot of my posts, I often hear that I am putting too much focus on him and not enough on me. very true. And I also hear "the question..what are YOU going to do?" So over the last two years I have had boundaries which took awhile to put in use, but now I do great. He is actively in AA for 7 months but h...

Wilady8 · Wilady8

My fiancé who has been in AA , 11 years sober, has completely stopped approaching me for sex or wanting to have sex. It has been over 2 weeks which may not seem like very long but its the longest we have gone. When I bring it up he says he just doesn't want to. I ask him why and he says he has built a wall up and he do...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Today's reading is about forgiveness and the freedom it brings us. It's also a reminder that forgiveness isn't always finite- we may forgive ourselves or others only to have old resentments come back to us. It is suggested that revisiting and working the steps is a way to fre...

oceanpine · oceanpine

I just got back from my 2-hour hearing, and wanted to share with you all... the judge accepted my parenting plan as is, and stated in court that it was apparent that my AH has a drinking problem and is not doing anything about it, and that she found me to be a credible witness. She commented that many pare...

Funkified · Funkified

How have you all dealt with people at meetings that you found to be disruptive, or disrespectful? I recently missed a number of meetings in a row due to illness. Initially, I had something I could spread, then some of the symptoms died down, but not others, and a doctor visit was in order to be sure I di...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

One thing that has been really difficult for me to do is take the focus off of other people and putting it on me. I can talk about things in my life, what I'm doing, what my schedule is, however when I first came to Alanon I could not tell someone what my favorite color was, what kind of movies I liked, books I...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Good morning all and sorry for the late post of a daily reading! I've had little people spend the night and it certainly changes up my morning routine. I've left my Courage to Change at my meeting so we have One Day at a Time in Al-Anon for today. The reading discusses what stands between us and serenity...

PosiesandPuppies · PosiesandPuppies

So I have mouthwash in our bathroom. We were going through it like crazy! All this time, I thought it was my son (you know, being a teen and all). Last Saturday I bought another bottle of mouthwash... except this time it was a brand name, and had ZERO ALCOHOL in bold, large print on the label. Not only that,...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I did a HUGE disservice to my XAH while we were together because I did the emotional work of ALL of his relationships .. this went from me to his family. Apparently I deemed it my duty because I had a uterus that it was my "job". Something I look at today is again we are back to the issue of meddling, fixing a...

Momto3 · Momto3

Hello, Like so many I too, have been reading posts etc hoping to find or more so- let reality set in. Like a concrete slab to what I believe I already know. I'm a 44 yr old divorced mom of 3. Youngest is special needs so I still have to work pt around him. I lived a typical very normal life with my ex of 21 years...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's page takes a thought provoking look at the personal story told in AlAnon, as the writer asks: 'Is it our own?' In AlAnon, there is no spokesperson who gives an official narrative that covers all experiences. It is as each, unique member shares their own experience, strength, and hope that ot...

hotrod · hotrod

link:http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t63543370/step-6-alanon-5-10-2017Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on t...

Helpangel · Helpangel

I posted a couple of weeks ago about leaving the house because my ah got mad bc of dog poop, yep dog poop. somewhere, somehow I just had enough. Enough of the bad moods, enough of him being angry at the dogs, work, strangers anything and everything. The whole time I thought it was the alcohol but nope it's...

Sorcha · Sorcha

I need to share, I am at my wit's end and really I know it's probably ridiculous and a big overreaction on my part but I would like to hear other's opinions and suggestions. I finally got to talk to my dry alcoholic partner about the issues that came up between us a couple of weeks ago which I posted about her...

Bettertomorrow · Bettertomorrow

Hello - I would really appreciate anyone who can share ESH regarding an AH stealing money from their spouse. My AH are I separating due to his alcohol issues and he is going to return to his home country in 2 months (basically working a notice period at work and saving up some money to take with him)...

giraffe13 · giraffe13

I have not posted here in awhile. My ex A BF and I have been apart for a little over 1 year. I have been seeing someone new, meeting friends, my life has drastically improved to my old self. Relief there. But, of course we leave them and think they are going to just crumble in their disease and fall on a stree...

shrnp · shrnp

I had not heard from my A ex-bf in a few weeks. Then he calls because he has a lot of stressful things going on. He is not drinking still which is good, and he found a place to live which is even better. Then, after the stressful part of the move was over I did not hear from him for a few days. I figured that is how h...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hi, My face to face group has a few teen who come regularly, and I am wondering if anyone has experience working with an Alateen group, or with teens attending an Alanon Family group. If you do, could you PM me? Thanks!

oceanpine · oceanpine

hi friends - have been lurking lots but not posting. Started a full-time job in Feb, and between that and full-time parenting 2 kids, I have less energy than I ever have. This week, my STBX AH and I go to court for the first time. I am very very grateful that our children are both away on a school trip all wee...

Aerin · Aerin

I posted the other day that I once again declined my ABF hopes that I would move in with him (its been 5yrs but he has only been in AA for 7 months and not completely sober those 7 months) I know I made the right call, but it still sucks. It is hard living in separate homes and financially we would be way better o...

hotrod · hotrod

Good Morning MIP family-- Today is the 10 th Anniversary of my son, Stephen's passing from this dreadful disease. If you think of it, please remember us in your prayers . Thank you. http://hotrod.last-memories.com

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

AlAnon provides many gifts to its members. One of the greatest gifts is freedom from the despair many of us arrived with as we tried to control the uncontrollable, alcohol. Today's page notes that there is a price to be paid to receive them. This price is acceptance of Step 1, where we give up our self-di...

tealfighter · tealfighter

Have any of you ever gone back to a recovering alcoholic after a time apart? How did it work? Did you just fall into the same old habits?

PosiesandPuppies · PosiesandPuppies

How do you stick to your boundaries if your AH won't abide by them? I understand boundaries are for YOU, not the alcoholic. So here is my examples: My AH is angry that I took my teen son and the dog to my mom & dad's house last night. I have told him in the past that I can't handle being in the house when he i...

John Brady · John Brady

I'd like to introduce myself and summarize my story. I'm in my 50's and am married with two daughters. I grew up in a typically dysfunctional alcoholic house with a father who was violent and a mother who was clinically depressed. I loved them both very much and still do.; although, my dad passed two...

VickiR · VickiR

Feeling a lot of worry and sadness tonight. I work in the wedding industry and tomorrow marks the beginning of a busy work season for me for the next few months. AH is out at some bar at the moment and I am feeling such dread for tomorrow. All winter/spring when he doesn't wake up or help on the weekends I jus...

starcatcher2 · starcatcher2

Today has been rough. Missing my ex, but not missing the drama, or the alcohol. I guess IM just missing what could have been. So many obstacles that it never could have been. I just hate the thought of loosing all those "possibilitie", even though I know I gave what I could to a person that didn't think it w...

Summerlady · Summerlady

My son & his wife divorced over a year ago. Ex daughter-in-law remarried last Oct. Son is engaged. Ex daughter in law has been a stink. She bashes our son to the kids & my husband & I as well. And lots of other things too. I have learned a lot this year; we just try to pour into the kids lives, we d...

Lana · Lana

When are online meetings?

Lana · Lana

My adult unmarried 30 year old daughter has relapsed after 3 years of sobriety. She started dating a drinker about a year ago. She told him she was an alccoholic when they met, but she returned to alcohol again because he started excluding her from social events with his drinking friends. She also stop...

Bodhismom · Bodhismom

I found out that my fiance relapsed last month and dabbled with percoset he said he was done the last time he did it and he was glad I found out. He has been clean for almost 5 years. We have a wedding planned in 4 months. When. I met him he was 6 months clean. I've been to meetings with him over the last 5 years an...

WestMan · WestMan

I just took the dog outside. She walked around the corner of the house and I followed. Stumbled upon my AS who was running to hide a half empty bottle of wine. I was stunned. She had to tell me three months ago that she was and alcoholic. I took this as a good sign that she was willing to be honest about it. She'...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODA T reading for May 7 points out that Al-Anon's main purpose is to help those living in an alcoholic situation. To that purpose, we are each helped by sharing our experience ,strength and hope. We don't and should not give advise or attempt to solve others financial or emotional issu...

MissM · MissM

Today's C2C speaks of the fifth step-where we admit our wrongdoings to another person... and how intimidating it can be to contemplate admitting our shortcomings to another person, especially when we have poured time and energy into concealing what we see as terrible flaws in our characters, fear...

grateful al anon member · morganalfie

hello everyone been going to marvellous weekly al anon meetings for two years got a lovely sponsor and starting to work step one . iam fully committed to al anon it saved my sanity I had no idea my husband was an alcoholic weve been together 17 years he never drank in front of me . he lost his health job and dr...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

My son's cremation is next Wednesday and I think I just about cried my eyes out. I'm asking for a little prayer just to get through this next faze of grieving. Don't have anyone here to talk to and I'm feeling quite alone right now. I hurt alot

Bethany66 · Bethany66

I am sad. I am lonely. I miss my partner. I miss spending time together. I miss sleeping together in the same bed at the same time. I miss the life I thought we would have after 22 years of marriage. I am having to face up and keep my boundaries and start going places without him. I am going to have to fi...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Today is a good day. I am enjoying the days when we don't have any rain. It sure is nice to see the flowers blooming & even the neighbors mowing the lawns . I have been feeling like making some changes in my life. I know that I hoard stuff. I know that I will always be a hoarder. It is just time to take everyt...

PosiesandPuppies · PosiesandPuppies

This is long, so please bear with me, I need to get it out... So last Wednesday I went to bed at 1:10 am after a movie and some MIP board viewing. I was awoken by my AH in obvious distress. Since he has suffered from an unprovoked PE 3 years ago, I was somewhat concerned. I say somewhat b/c lately he has resort...

starcatcher2 · starcatcher2

Hello Everyone,I've been on this forum quite a few times. I appreciate all the support people have given me in making whatever decision I have made. What brought me to this forum was because I found out my now xab was cheating online. Going on dating web sites etc. Fast forward to now, and I think of h...

hotrod · hotrod

The transition committee is in the final stages of transitioning the Miracle in Progress, Account from John over to the committee. We have been advised that the chat room and meeting room costs of $149.00 for the year needs to be paid by May 15. The message board bill has already been paid and we are n...

Sus · Sus

I did it again.. I went back to my addict ex expecting a different outcome. Things were great for four months and BOOM, he exploded over nothing and blamed it all on me. What is wrong with me continually returning to the scene of the crime?

el-cee · el-cee

Ive heard people say to let the feelings flow and pass. What does that mean? For me, I can let the feelings dominate me and grow and then Im confused and any action I take in this mode is usually a disaster. Ive learned to 'Stop' and 'Think' and I am aware that my feelings are in charge and rational thought i...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

One thing about this program that has REALLY come out in my own behavior is how I like to fix, manage and control situations that are seriously NONE OF MY BUSINESS. This was one of those lessons that open AA meetings served me better than Alanon meetings .. sometimes my brain relates better to those mee...

_bunny_ · _bunny_

What are the most helpful/brilliant/enlightening/encourageing words your sponsor has shared with you?

Iamhere · Iamhere

Good morning MIP family - happy Friday!! Today's reading in Courage to Change is about humility. It suggests many of us were taught from an early age to place the wants and needs of others ahead of our own. This taught us to equate humility with taking care of others and ignoring our own feelings and ne...

a4l · a4l

One of the sharpest blades of alcoholism both mine and others, is embarrassment. I know we can't control others, but how exactly do you avoid being tarred with the same brush as loved ones? I've had a lifetime of defending sick alcoholics and I'm done with it now. How do you brush off the gossipers? Wit...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Alcoholism is sneaky (Preview) I've been doing well in recovery as has AH. He's had a few slips. I've established a boundary of not being able to be in the relationship if he drinks. How do I draw the line? Slips I've read are a part of recovery. I know Alcoholism is unmanageable. It will get worse if the past is an indicator. Is this where...	sunmustshine	4	740	May 13, 2017 by Lyne
	How do I support him but keep our heads above water? (Preview) hello first time at alanon. My husband has been an AH since 2008. He has barely worked in that time only my income. He has spent so much on alcohol and he has a spending problem in general. I have worked so hard all these years to move up in my job to make more money to support everyone. I have three teenagers...	Dinner	8	648	May 13, 2017 by Mattie
	Intimacy and alcohol (Preview) Hello I am extraordinary frustrated and can cry oceans and seas combined. I have a live in B.F. he has 3 kids in late teens that do not reside with us, however, my 2 special needs do. He is a functional alcoholic and gets very hot tempered when he drinks. He doesnt have to even be drunk when he begins his rant...	Ina	1	542	May 13, 2017 by andromeda
	Fixing your mistakes (Preview) So when my qualifier and I were close we used to fly remote control airplanes together. I miss it. I also realize some of my insaine behaviour while a part of the group. I would like to fly again. I however feel shunned by some in the group. Of course my mom does not want me to fly again because she doesn't wan...	tealfighter	3	545	May 13, 2017 by Iamhere
	Courage To Change 13/5 (Preview) Today's c2c discusses the difficulties many of us face when trying to make decisions. Many of us that have lived in alcoholic chaos dread and avoid making decisions for fear that no matter what we decide, the consequences will be something we must "suffer". We also may perceive that there is a single "...	MissM	3	532	May 13, 2017 by Jayla
	One Day at a Time in Al-Anon - 5/12/17 (Preview) Good morning all and sorry for the late post of a daily reading! I've had little people spend the night again and it certainly changes up my routine. As I've heard - better late than never! The reading discusses how many of us show up to Al-Anon obsessively focused on our alcoholic. We want the secret...	Iamhere	5	592	May 12, 2017 by hotrod
	HELP needed!! (Preview) I don't know what to do. My relationship with my adult alcoholic daughter, who lives several thousand miles away is in such bad shape. We talked yesterday because my husband is sick and needs one or possibly two surgeries. I could tell she was drunk and missed work again. This happened after a several d...	Lana	9	693	May 12, 2017 by serenity47
	Conflicted- about to have baby in 8 days. (Preview) I've posted on here a couple of times about my issue, and those of you who responded- your thoughts were very helpful to me. My AH, sober for over 1 yr who relapsed 2 mos from us having our first child, is still drinking and has not stopped. I left the house and am staying with my mother in law (his mom). His...	LoveNHope	5	564	May 12, 2017 by a4l
	Interdependency/ Co-Dependency How to end a relationship (Preview) I am working really hard to stay out of the co-dependent stuff relationship wise. If I had a choice in relationships what I want is an interdependent relationship something where we share a common goal rooted together however thrive independently of one another. Without the insecure issues of sel...	SerenityRUS	5	589	May 12, 2017 by a4l
	So Done with this. (Preview) It's 2am and I slept about two hours. I'm so over this BS right now. Yesterday was a bit of a breaking point. I'm ready to throw in the towel on this marriage, my career and myself. I have so little support. I'm actively being undermined by people at work who are supposed to be helping me on a serious project...	WestMan	4	638	May 12, 2017 by Iamhere
	He says he is planning on moving out ending a relationship moving out break up (Preview) My fiancé of 2 years told me tonight that he is planning on moving out. I have been in recovery (al-anon) for one month and I feel like there is hope for me as a person as well as our relationship since joining Al-anon, going to meetings, and getting a sponsor. But now he says he is planning on moving out of ou...	Wilady8	4	2897	May 12, 2017 by Iamhere
	I paid $1250 for every month I was married (Preview) I'm happy I got divorced but still mad about the money I had to give my ex. I lived in small places and drove old cars to save for retirement as a single mom and put my daughter through college. He got the house and $100k from my IRA. I get to be divorced. In the long run I know I'll be fine financially, and that...	Mcat54	7	784	May 12, 2017 by Iamhere
	do i speak up? (Preview) A relative with family 3 kids, moved in with my us. Idea was to help both families. For the most part it is good. But, a big but. Ive been thinking and praying over this for about 2 months. I go to 2-3 meetings per week, working hard to take care of myself, (self care so foreign for me). Any input ?? Wha...	runi	12	729	May 12, 2017 by Iamhere
	CONSEQUENCES (Preview) In response to a lot of my posts, I often hear that I am putting too much focus on him and not enough on me. very true. And I also hear "the question..what are YOU going to do?" So over the last two years I have had boundaries which took awhile to put in use, but now I do great. He is actively in AA for 7 months but h...	Aerin	8	511	May 12, 2017 by runi
	He stopped wanting to have sex sex running away (Preview) My fiancé who has been in AA , 11 years sober, has completely stopped approaching me for sex or wanting to have sex. It has been over 2 weeks which may not seem like very long but its the longest we have gone. When I bring it up he says he just doesn't want to. I ask him why and he says he has built a wall up and he do...	Wilady8	14	695	May 12, 2017 by Bo
	Hope for Today May 9 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Today's reading is about forgiveness and the freedom it brings us. It's also a reminder that forgiveness isn't always finite- we may forgive ourselves or others only to have old resentments come back to us. It is suggested that revisiting and working the steps is a way to fre...	yanksfan51	4	590	May 11, 2017 by hotrod
	update on court hearing (Preview) I just got back from my 2-hour hearing, and wanted to share with you all... the judge accepted my parenting plan as is, and stated in court that it was apparent that my AH has a drinking problem and is not doing anything about it, and that she found me to be a credible witness. She commented that many pare...	oceanpine	5	553	May 11, 2017 by hotrod
	Dealing With Personalities At Meetings (Preview) How have you all dealt with people at meetings that you found to be disruptive, or disrespectful? I recently missed a number of meetings in a row due to illness. Initially, I had something I could spread, then some of the symptoms died down, but not others, and a doctor visit was in order to be sure I di...	Funkified	12	837	May 11, 2017 by tiredtonite
	Retraining my focus (Preview) One thing that has been really difficult for me to do is take the focus off of other people and putting it on me. I can talk about things in my life, what I'm doing, what my schedule is, however when I first came to Alanon I could not tell someone what my favorite color was, what kind of movies I liked, books I...	SerenityRUS	16	733	May 11, 2017 by Junenine
	ODAT in Al-Anon Daily Reading 5/11/17 (Preview) Good morning all and sorry for the late post of a daily reading! I've had little people spend the night and it certainly changes up my morning routine. I've left my Courage to Change at my meeting so we have One Day at a Time in Al-Anon for today. The reading discusses what stands between us and serenity...	Iamhere	4	1861	May 11, 2017 by Iamhere
	Funny, but not. (Preview) So I have mouthwash in our bathroom. We were going through it like crazy! All this time, I thought it was my son (you know, being a teen and all). Last Saturday I bought another bottle of mouthwash... except this time it was a brand name, and had ZERO ALCOHOL in bold, large print on the label. Not only that,...	PosiesandPuppies	4	556	May 11, 2017 by SerenityRUS
	Doing the Emotional Work .. (Preview) I did a HUGE disservice to my XAH while we were together because I did the emotional work of ALL of his relationships .. this went from me to his family. Apparently I deemed it my duty because I had a uterus that it was my "job". Something I look at today is again we are back to the issue of meddling, fixing a...	SerenityRUS	4	573	May 11, 2017 by Bo
	Intro (Preview) Hello, Like so many I too, have been reading posts etc hoping to find or more so- let reality set in. Like a concrete slab to what I believe I already know. I'm a 44 yr old divorced mom of 3. Youngest is special needs so I still have to work pt around him. I lived a typical very normal life with my ex of 21 years...	Momto3	10	576	May 10, 2017 by Jayla
	5/10/17 Courage to Change – Telling Our Own Story (Preview) Today's page takes a thought provoking look at the personal story told in AlAnon, as the writer asks: 'Is it our own?' In AlAnon, there is no spokesperson who gives an official narrative that covers all experiences. It is as each, unique member shares their own experience, strength, and hope that ot...	Enigmatic	4	961	May 10, 2017 by Iamhere
	Step 6 posted (Preview) link:http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t63543370/step-6-alanon-5-10-2017Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on t...	hotrod	0	418	May 10, 2017 by hotrod
	It's so...peaceful (Preview) I posted a couple of weeks ago about leaving the house because my ah got mad bc of dog poop, yep dog poop. somewhere, somehow I just had enough. Enough of the bad moods, enough of him being angry at the dogs, work, strangers anything and everything. The whole time I thought it was the alcohol but nope it's...	Helpangel	6	537	May 10, 2017 by Sorcha
	Button pressing (Preview) I need to share, I am at my wit's end and really I know it's probably ridiculous and a big overreaction on my part but I would like to hear other's opinions and suggestions. I finally got to talk to my dry alcoholic partner about the issues that came up between us a couple of weeks ago which I posted about her...	Sorcha	11	632	May 10, 2017 by Sorcha
	ESH please regarding AH stealing money (Preview) Hello - I would really appreciate anyone who can share ESH regarding an AH stealing money from their spouse. My AH are I separating due to his alcohol issues and he is going to return to his home country in 2 months (basically working a notice period at work and saving up some money to take with him)...	Bettertomorrow	23	687	May 10, 2017 by Bettertomorrow
	questioning my sanity (Preview) I have not posted here in awhile. My ex A BF and I have been apart for a little over 1 year. I have been seeing someone new, meeting friends, my life has drastically improved to my old self. Relief there. But, of course we leave them and think they are going to just crumble in their disease and fall on a stree...	giraffe13	10	476	May 10, 2017 by Iamhere
	Same old patterns (Preview) I had not heard from my A ex-bf in a few weeks. Then he calls because he has a lot of stressful things going on. He is not drinking still which is good, and he found a place to live which is even better. Then, after the stressful part of the move was over I did not hear from him for a few days. I figured that is how h...	shrnp	4	543	May 10, 2017 by Iamhere
	Anyone have experience with Alateen? (Preview) Hi, My face to face group has a few teen who come regularly, and I am wondering if anyone has experience working with an Alateen group, or with teens attending an Alanon Family group. If you do, could you PM me? Thanks!	Skorpi	2	511	May 10, 2017 by Skorpi
	court date thurs - would love ESH from anyone who has been through this (Preview) hi friends - have been lurking lots but not posting. Started a full-time job in Feb, and between that and full-time parenting 2 kids, I have less energy than I ever have. This week, my STBX AH and I go to court for the first time. I am very very grateful that our children are both away on a school trip all wee...	oceanpine	14	550	May 9, 2017 by a4l
	I feel bad for him... ugggg (Preview) I posted the other day that I once again declined my ABF hopes that I would move in with him (its been 5yrs but he has only been in AA for 7 months and not completely sober those 7 months) I know I made the right call, but it still sucks. It is hard living in separate homes and financially we would be way better o...	Aerin	7	558	May 9, 2017 by Aerin
	Prayers (Preview) Good Morning MIP family-- Today is the 10 th Anniversary of my son, Stephen's passing from this dreadful disease. If you think of it, please remember us in your prayers . Thank you. http://hotrod.last-memories.com	hotrod	21	550	May 9, 2017 by oceanpine
	5/8/17 ODAT - The Price We Pay... (Preview) AlAnon provides many gifts to its members. One of the greatest gifts is freedom from the despair many of us arrived with as we tried to control the uncontrollable, alcohol. Today's page notes that there is a price to be paid to receive them. This price is acceptance of Step 1, where we give up our self-di...	Enigmatic	7	564	May 9, 2017 by Iamhere
	Going back? (Preview) Have any of you ever gone back to a recovering alcoholic after a time apart? How did it work? Did you just fall into the same old habits?	tealfighter	10	626	May 9, 2017 by Iamhere
	Needing some ESH (Preview) How do you stick to your boundaries if your AH won't abide by them? I understand boundaries are for YOU, not the alcoholic. So here is my examples: My AH is angry that I took my teen son and the dog to my mom & dad's house last night. I have told him in the past that I can't handle being in the house when he i...	PosiesandPuppies	15	720	May 9, 2017 by PosiesandPuppies
	Newbie story (Preview) I'd like to introduce myself and summarize my story. I'm in my 50's and am married with two daughters. I grew up in a typically dysfunctional alcoholic house with a father who was violent and a mother who was clinically depressed. I loved them both very much and still do.; although, my dad passed two...	John Brady	7	832	May 8, 2017 by a4l
	Back to work and my daughter (Preview) Feeling a lot of worry and sadness tonight. I work in the wedding industry and tomorrow marks the beginning of a busy work season for me for the next few months. AH is out at some bar at the moment and I am feeling such dread for tomorrow. All winter/spring when he doesn't wake up or help on the weekends I jus...	VickiR	8	589	May 8, 2017 by VickiR
	Just looking for positive words (Preview) Today has been rough. Missing my ex, but not missing the drama, or the alcohol. I guess IM just missing what could have been. So many obstacles that it never could have been. I just hate the thought of loosing all those "possibilitie", even though I know I gave what I could to a person that didn't think it w...	starcatcher2	16	480	May 8, 2017 by starcatcher2
	ESH for grandchildren whose parents have divorced. (Preview) My son & his wife divorced over a year ago. Ex daughter-in-law remarried last Oct. Son is engaged. Ex daughter in law has been a stink. She bashes our son to the kids & my husband & I as well. And lots of other things too. I have learned a lot this year; we just try to pour into the kids lives, we d...	Summerlady	6	418	May 7, 2017 by Summerlady
	Online meeting (Preview) When are online meetings?	Lana	1	336	May 7, 2017 by KennyFenderjazz
	So lost (Preview) My adult unmarried 30 year old daughter has relapsed after 3 years of sobriety. She started dating a drinker about a year ago. She told him she was an alccoholic when they met, but she returned to alcohol again because he started excluding her from social events with his drinking friends. She also stop...	Lana	24	1578	May 7, 2017 by Lana
	Don't know what to do (Preview) I found out that my fiance relapsed last month and dabbled with percoset he said he was done the last time he did it and he was glad I found out. He has been clean for almost 5 years. We have a wedding planned in 4 months. When. I met him he was 6 months clean. I've been to meetings with him over the last 5 years an...	Bodhismom	9	519	May 7, 2017 by Junenine
	Well, that's new. (Preview) I just took the dog outside. She walked around the corner of the house and I followed. Stumbled upon my AS who was running to hide a half empty bottle of wine. I was stunned. She had to tell me three months ago that she was and alcoholic. I took this as a good sign that she was willing to be honest about it. She'...	WestMan	14	566	May 7, 2017 by WestMan
	ODAT Reading 5-7 (Preview) The ODA T reading for May 7 points out that Al-Anon's main purpose is to help those living in an alcoholic situation. To that purpose, we are each helped by sharing our experience ,strength and hope. We don't and should not give advise or attempt to solve others financial or emotional issu...	hotrod	1	499	May 7, 2017 by Iamhere
	Courage To Change 6/5 (Preview) Today's C2C speaks of the fifth step-where we admit our wrongdoings to another person... and how intimidating it can be to contemplate admitting our shortcomings to another person, especially when we have poured time and energy into concealing what we see as terrible flaws in our characters, fear...	MissM	2	363	May 7, 2017 by hotrod
	grateful al anon member (Preview) hello everyone been going to marvellous weekly al anon meetings for two years got a lovely sponsor and starting to work step one . iam fully committed to al anon it saved my sanity I had no idea my husband was an alcoholic weve been together 17 years he never drank in front of me . he lost his health job and dr...	morganalfie	5	2479	May 7, 2017 by hotrod
	Sad (Preview) My son's cremation is next Wednesday and I think I just about cried my eyes out. I'm asking for a little prayer just to get through this next faze of grieving. Don't have anyone here to talk to and I'm feeling quite alone right now. I hurt alot	Cathyinaz	30	1016	May 7, 2017 by _bunny_
	Feeling very down today (Preview) I am sad. I am lonely. I miss my partner. I miss spending time together. I miss sleeping together in the same bed at the same time. I miss the life I thought we would have after 22 years of marriage. I am having to face up and keep my boundaries and start going places without him. I am going to have to fi...	Bethany66	6	682	May 7, 2017 by Marie71
	here I go again (Preview) Today is a good day. I am enjoying the days when we don't have any rain. It sure is nice to see the flowers blooming & even the neighbors mowing the lawns . I have been feeling like making some changes in my life. I know that I hoard stuff. I know that I will always be a hoarder. It is just time to take everyt...	Hoot Nanny	2	358	May 6, 2017 by Iamhere
	It's Been A Tough Ride Lately (Preview) This is long, so please bear with me, I need to get it out... So last Wednesday I went to bed at 1:10 am after a movie and some MIP board viewing. I was awoken by my AH in obvious distress. Since he has suffered from an unprovoked PE 3 years ago, I was somewhat concerned. I say somewhat b/c lately he has resort...	PosiesandPuppies	11	679	May 6, 2017 by Stan1
	Struggling to forgive....myself (Preview) Hello Everyone,I've been on this forum quite a few times. I appreciate all the support people have given me in making whatever decision I have made. What brought me to this forum was because I found out my now xab was cheating online. Going on dating web sites etc. Fast forward to now, and I think of h...	starcatcher2	21	777	May 6, 2017 by starcatcher2
	Transition update and donation request (Preview) The transition committee is in the final stages of transitioning the Miracle in Progress, Account from John over to the committee. We have been advised that the chat room and meeting room costs of $149.00 for the year needs to be paid by May 15. The message board bill has already been paid and we are n...	hotrod	23	891	May 6, 2017 by Enigmatic
	I did it again.... (Preview) I did it again.. I went back to my addict ex expecting a different outcome. Things were great for four months and BOOM, he exploded over nothing and blamed it all on me. What is wrong with me continually returning to the scene of the crime?	Sus	21	522	May 6, 2017 by Sus
	How do you do 'feelings?' (Preview) Ive heard people say to let the feelings flow and pass. What does that mean? For me, I can let the feelings dominate me and grow and then Im confused and any action I take in this mode is usually a disaster. Ive learned to 'Stop' and 'Think' and I am aware that my feelings are in charge and rational thought i...	el-cee	11	732	May 5, 2017 by Cathyinaz
	I'm a bonifide meddler .. (Preview) One thing about this program that has REALLY come out in my own behavior is how I like to fix, manage and control situations that are seriously NONE OF MY BUSINESS. This was one of those lessons that open AA meetings served me better than Alanon meetings .. sometimes my brain relates better to those mee...	SerenityRUS	2	579	May 5, 2017 by el-cee
	Sponsor Share (Preview) What are the most helpful/brilliant/enlightening/encourageing words your sponsor has shared with you?	_bunny_	7	508	May 5, 2017 by el-cee
	Courage to Change (C2C) 5/5/17 (Preview) Good morning MIP family - happy Friday!! Today's reading in Courage to Change is about humility. It suggests many of us were taught from an early age to place the wants and needs of others ahead of our own. This taught us to equate humility with taking care of others and ignoring our own feelings and ne...	Iamhere	3	499	May 5, 2017 by hotrod
	Overcoming embarrassment. (Preview) One of the sharpest blades of alcoholism both mine and others, is embarrassment. I know we can't control others, but how exactly do you avoid being tarred with the same brush as loved ones? I've had a lifetime of defending sick alcoholics and I'm done with it now. How do you brush off the gossipers? Wit...	a4l	6	2531	May 5, 2017 by a4l
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.