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He stopped wanting to have sex
(Preview)
My fiancé who has been in AA , 11 years sober, has completely stopped approaching me for sex or wanting to have sex. It has been over 2 weeks which may not seem like very long but its the longest we have gone. When I bring it up he says he just doesn't want to. I ask him why and he says he has built a wall up and he do...
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Wilady8
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14
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520
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Hope for Today May 9
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Today's reading is about forgiveness and the freedom it brings us. It's also a reminder that forgiveness isn't always finite- we may forgive ourselves or others only to have old resentments come back to us. It is suggested that revisiting and working the steps is a way to fre...
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yanksfan51
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4
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405
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update on court hearing
(Preview)
I just got back from my 2-hour hearing, and wanted to share with you all... the judge accepted my parenting plan as is, and stated in court that it was apparent that my AH has a drinking problem and is not doing anything about it, and that she found me to be a credible witness. She commented that many pare...
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oceanpine
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5
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387
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Dealing With Personalities At Meetings
(Preview)
How have you all dealt with people at meetings that you found to be disruptive, or disrespectful? I recently missed a number of meetings in a row due to illness. Initially, I had something I could spread, then some of the symptoms died down, but not others, and a doctor visit was in order to be sure I di...
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Funkified
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12
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660
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Retraining my focus
(Preview)
One thing that has been really difficult for me to do is take the focus off of other people and putting it on me. I can talk about things in my life, what I'm doing, what my schedule is, however when I first came to Alanon I could not tell someone what my favorite color was, what kind of movies I liked, books I...
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SerenityRUS
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16
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595
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ODAT in Al-Anon Daily Reading 5/11/17
(Preview)
Good morning all and sorry for the late post of a daily reading! I've had little people spend the night and it certainly changes up my morning routine. I've left my Courage to Change at my meeting so we have One Day at a Time in Al-Anon for today. The reading discusses what stands between us and serenity...
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Iamhere
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4
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1566
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Funny, but not.
(Preview)
So I have mouthwash in our bathroom. We were going through it like crazy! All this time, I thought it was my son (you know, being a teen and all). Last Saturday I bought another bottle of mouthwash... except this time it was a brand name, and had ZERO ALCOHOL in bold, large print on the label. Not only that,...
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PosiesandPuppies
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4
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402
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Doing the Emotional Work ..
(Preview)
I did a HUGE disservice to my XAH while we were together because I did the emotional work of ALL of his relationships .. this went from me to his family. Apparently I deemed it my duty because I had a uterus that it was my "job". Something I look at today is again we are back to the issue of meddling, fixing a...
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SerenityRUS
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4
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420
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Intro
(Preview)
Hello,
Like so many I too, have been reading posts etc hoping to find or more so- let reality set in. Like a concrete slab to what I believe I already know.
I'm a 44 yr old divorced mom of 3. Youngest is special needs so I still have to work pt around him. I lived a typical very normal life with my ex of 21 years...
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Momto3
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10
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429
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5/10/17 Courage to Change – Telling Our Own Story
(Preview)
Today's page takes a thought provoking look at the personal story told in AlAnon, as the writer asks: 'Is it our own?' In AlAnon, there is no spokesperson who gives an official narrative that covers all experiences. It is as each, unique member shares their own experience, strength, and hope that ot...
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Enigmatic
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4
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593
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Step 6 posted
(Preview)
link:http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t63543370/step-6-alanon-5-10-2017Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on t...
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hotrod
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0
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302
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It's so...peaceful
(Preview)
I posted a couple of weeks ago about leaving the house because my ah got mad bc of dog poop, yep dog poop. somewhere, somehow I just had enough. Enough of the bad moods, enough of him being angry at the dogs, work, strangers anything and everything. The whole time I thought it was the alcohol but nope it's...
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Helpangel
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6
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401
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Button pressing
(Preview)
I need to share, I am at my wit's end and really I know it's probably ridiculous and a big overreaction on my part but I would like to hear other's opinions and suggestions. I finally got to talk to my dry alcoholic partner about the issues that came up between us a couple of weeks ago which I posted about her...
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Sorcha
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11
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476
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ESH please regarding AH stealing money
(Preview)
Hello - I would really appreciate anyone who can share ESH regarding an AH stealing money from their spouse. My AH are I separating due to his alcohol issues and he is going to return to his home country in 2 months (basically working a notice period at work and saving up some money to take with him)...
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Bettertomorrow
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23
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527
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questioning my sanity
(Preview)
I have not posted here in awhile. My ex A BF and I have been apart for a little over 1 year. I have been seeing someone new, meeting friends, my life has drastically improved to my old self. Relief there. But, of course we leave them and think they are going to just crumble in their disease and fall on a stree...
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giraffe13
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10
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317
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Same old patterns
(Preview)
I had not heard from my A ex-bf in a few weeks. Then he calls because he has a lot of stressful things going on. He is not drinking still which is good, and he found a place to live which is even better. Then, after the stressful part of the move was over I did not hear from him for a few days. I figured that is how h...
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shrnp
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4
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385
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Anyone have experience with Alateen?
(Preview)
Hi, My face to face group has a few teen who come regularly, and I am wondering if anyone has experience working with an Alateen group, or with teens attending an Alanon Family group. If you do, could you PM me? Thanks!
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Skorpi
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2
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277
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court date thurs - would love ESH from anyone who has been through this
(Preview)
hi friends - have been lurking lots but not posting. Started a full-time job in Feb, and between that and full-time parenting 2 kids, I have less energy than I ever have. This week, my STBX AH and I go to court for the first time. I am very very grateful that our children are both away on a school trip all wee...
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oceanpine
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14
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395
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I feel bad for him... ugggg
(Preview)
I posted the other day that I once again declined my ABF hopes that I would move in with him (its been 5yrs but he has only been in AA for 7 months and not completely sober those 7 months) I know I made the right call, but it still sucks. It is hard living in separate homes and financially we would be way better o...
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Aerin
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7
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423
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Prayers
(Preview)
Good Morning MIP family-- Today is the 10 th Anniversary of my son, Stephen's passing from this dreadful disease. If you think of it, please remember us in your prayers . Thank you. http://hotrod.last-memories.com
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hotrod
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21
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397
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5/8/17 ODAT - The Price We Pay...
(Preview)
AlAnon provides many gifts to its members. One of the greatest gifts is freedom from the despair many of us arrived with as we tried to control the uncontrollable, alcohol. Today's page notes that there is a price to be paid to receive them. This price is acceptance of Step 1, where we give up our self-di...
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Enigmatic
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7
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417
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Going back?
(Preview)
Have any of you ever gone back to a recovering alcoholic after a time apart? How did it work? Did you just fall into the same old habits?
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tealfighter
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10
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469
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Needing some ESH
(Preview)
How do you stick to your boundaries if your AH won't abide by them? I understand boundaries are for YOU, not the alcoholic. So here is my examples: My AH is angry that I took my teen son and the dog to my mom & dad's house last night. I have told him in the past that I can't handle being in the house when he i...
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PosiesandPuppies
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15
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507
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Newbie story
(Preview)
I'd like to introduce myself and summarize my story. I'm in my 50's and am married with two daughters. I grew up in a typically dysfunctional alcoholic house with a father who was violent and a mother who was clinically depressed. I loved them both very much and still do.; although, my dad passed two...
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John Brady
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7
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583
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Back to work and my daughter
(Preview)
Feeling a lot of worry and sadness tonight. I work in the wedding industry and tomorrow marks the beginning of a busy work season for me for the next few months. AH is out at some bar at the moment and I am feeling such dread for tomorrow. All winter/spring when he doesn't wake up or help on the weekends I jus...
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VickiR
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8
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452
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Just looking for positive words
(Preview)
Today has been rough. Missing my ex, but not missing the drama, or the alcohol. I guess IM just missing what could have been. So many obstacles that it never could have been. I just hate the thought of loosing all those "possibilitie", even though I know I gave what I could to a person that didn't think it w...
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starcatcher2
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16
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335
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ESH for grandchildren whose parents have divorced.
(Preview)
My son & his wife divorced over a year ago. Ex daughter-in-law remarried last Oct. Son is engaged. Ex daughter in law has been a stink. She bashes our son to the kids & my husband & I as well. And lots of other things too. I have learned a lot this year; we just try to pour into the kids lives, we d...
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Summerlady
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6
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249
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Online meeting
(Preview)
When are online meetings?
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Lana
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1
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201
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So lost
(Preview)
My adult unmarried 30 year old daughter has relapsed after 3 years of sobriety. She started dating a drinker about a year ago. She told him she was an alccoholic when they met, but she returned to alcohol again because he started excluding her from social events with his drinking friends. She also stop...
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Lana
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24
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1205
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Don't know what to do
(Preview)
I found out that my fiance relapsed last month and dabbled with percoset he said he was done the last time he did it and he was glad I found out. He has been clean for almost 5 years. We have a wedding planned in 4 months. When. I met him he was 6 months clean. I've been to meetings with him over the last 5 years an...
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Bodhismom
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9
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325
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Well, that's new.
(Preview)
I just took the dog outside. She walked around the corner of the house and I followed. Stumbled upon my AS who was running to hide a half empty bottle of wine. I was stunned. She had to tell me three months ago that she was and alcoholic. I took this as a good sign that she was willing to be honest about it. She'...
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WestMan
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14
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417
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ODAT Reading 5-7
(Preview)
The ODA T reading for May 7 points out that Al-Anon's main purpose is to help those living in an alcoholic situation. To that purpose, we are each helped by sharing our experience ,strength and hope. We don't and should not give advise or attempt to solve others financial or emotional issu...
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hotrod
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1
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342
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Courage To Change 6/5
(Preview)
Today's C2C speaks of the fifth step-where we admit our wrongdoings to another person... and how intimidating it can be to contemplate admitting our shortcomings to another person, especially when we have poured time and energy into concealing what we see as terrible flaws in our characters, fear...
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MissM
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2
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217
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grateful al anon member
(Preview)
hello everyone been going to marvellous weekly al anon meetings for two years got a lovely sponsor and starting to work step one . iam fully committed to al anon it saved my sanity I had no idea my husband was an alcoholic weve been together 17 years he never drank in front of me . he lost his health job and dr...
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morganalfie
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5
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1956
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Sad
(Preview)
My son's cremation is next Wednesday and I think I just about cried my eyes out. I'm asking for a little prayer just to get through this next faze of grieving. Don't have anyone here to talk to and I'm feeling quite alone right now. I hurt alot
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Cathyinaz
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30
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835
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Feeling very down today
(Preview)
I am sad. I am lonely. I miss my partner. I miss spending time together. I miss sleeping together in the same bed at the same time. I miss the life I thought we would have after 22 years of marriage. I am having to face up and keep my boundaries and start going places without him. I am going to have to fi...
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Bethany66
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6
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525
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here I go again
(Preview)
Today is a good day. I am enjoying the days when we don't have any rain. It sure is nice to see the flowers blooming & even the neighbors mowing the lawns . I have been feeling like making some changes in my life. I know that I hoard stuff. I know that I will always be a hoarder. It is just time to take everyt...
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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216
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It's Been A Tough Ride Lately
(Preview)
This is long, so please bear with me, I need to get it out... So last Wednesday I went to bed at 1:10 am after a movie and some MIP board viewing. I was awoken by my AH in obvious distress. Since he has suffered from an unprovoked PE 3 years ago, I was somewhat concerned. I say somewhat b/c lately he has resort...
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PosiesandPuppies
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11
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525
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Struggling to forgive....myself
(Preview)
Hello Everyone,I've been on this forum quite a few times. I appreciate all the support people have given me in making whatever decision I have made. What brought me to this forum was because I found out my now xab was cheating online. Going on dating web sites etc. Fast forward to now, and I think of h...
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starcatcher2
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21
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604
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Transition update and donation request
(Preview)
The transition committee is in the final stages of transitioning the Miracle in Progress, Account from John over to the committee. We have been advised that the chat room and meeting room costs of $149.00 for the year needs to be paid by May 15. The message board bill has already been paid and we are n...
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hotrod
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23
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733
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I did it again....
(Preview)
I did it again.. I went back to my addict ex expecting a different outcome. Things were great for four months and BOOM, he exploded over nothing and blamed it all on me. What is wrong with me continually returning to the scene of the crime?
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Sus
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21
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357
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How do you do 'feelings?'
(Preview)
Ive heard people say to let the feelings flow and pass. What does that mean? For me, I can let the feelings dominate me and grow and then Im confused and any action I take in this mode is usually a disaster. Ive learned to 'Stop' and 'Think' and I am aware that my feelings are in charge and rational thought i...
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el-cee
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11
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551
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I'm a bonifide meddler ..
(Preview)
One thing about this program that has REALLY come out in my own behavior is how I like to fix, manage and control situations that are seriously NONE OF MY BUSINESS. This was one of those lessons that open AA meetings served me better than Alanon meetings .. sometimes my brain relates better to those mee...
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SerenityRUS
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2
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397
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Sponsor Share
(Preview)
What are the most helpful/brilliant/enlightening/encourageing words your sponsor has shared with you?
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_bunny_
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7
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363
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Courage to Change (C2C) 5/5/17
(Preview)
Good morning MIP family - happy Friday!! Today's reading in Courage to Change is about humility. It suggests many of us were taught from an early age to place the wants and needs of others ahead of our own. This taught us to equate humility with taking care of others and ignoring our own feelings and ne...
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Iamhere
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3
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363
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Overcoming embarrassment.
(Preview)
One of the sharpest blades of alcoholism both mine and others, is embarrassment.
I know we can't control others, but how exactly do you avoid being tarred with the same brush as loved ones? I've had a lifetime of defending sick alcoholics and I'm done with it now. How do you brush off the gossipers? Wit...
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a4l
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6
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1985
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relationships with alcoholic family members
(Preview)
I'm 35 and have cut off all of my family of origin. There are a few who I am in occasional contact with, and I love all of them, even the ones I know I will never let back in not even minutely. Its a very sick family in the affected by alcoholism sense. So for some members, the only boundary understood is No Entr...
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a4l
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7
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418
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New
(Preview)
Hi all, thank you for listening. I went to one meeting several months ago but I'm really struggling. A conversation with my husband today made me see that he still doesn't seem to think his drinking is a problem, and when I tell him I feel we're growing more and more emotionally distant and I can't see us c...
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Ladybug8
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5
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354
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Leaving Sponsor
(Preview)
I've chosen to end this relationship. It didn't go well. I realize I need a new sponsor and perspective. I have seen changes in my sponsor in the last few years that were very unsettling. I hesitate to reach out to her. She got rather ugly with me and that was when I said enough finally. She's been my sponso...
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tiredtonite
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11
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947
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Can I skip being new?
(Preview)
Hello all, I've been lurking around here for a month or so, and have gained so much comfort and peace from just checking in every few days and reading all the feedback & shares...... I've also been to a F2F meeting every week for a month now and wow - what a difference. I'm not sure what it is exactly (an...
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Habari76
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4
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224
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Survivor's Guilt
(Preview)
I think I'm realizing more how the alcoholism in my extended family has impacted my life more than I realized. I had actually considered attending Al-Anon years ago because a few things were stuck in my craw in regards to these relatives. But at the time life was looking up, I had plenty of excuses to mai...
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WestMan
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6
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467
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Courage to Change (C2C) 5/4/17
(Preview)
Today's daily reading is about finding ourselves through recovery. The reading suggests that Recovery is a wonderful word - it means getting something back. When we align with the program and work the 12 Steps, what we actually get back is ourselves - something wonderful in recovery is returned....
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Iamhere
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5
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363
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DUI's and the possibility
(Preview)
Hello Everyone, Just a question about DUI's. My exAB got another DUI a week ago, apparently this is like the 7th one ( I would say within 10 years). I don't know the time frame, but I do know he's had 2 in 2 years. I've tried googling questions about DUI's and what the possible outcome could be. I'...
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starcatcher2
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7
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1094
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First timer..
(Preview)
Hi there. I'm a first time poster. I have been to 2 Al-Anon meetings, one of which was very small, 3 people, myself, and a close friend that has been in AA for 4 years. The second meeting was about 40 people and felt very rushed with people not respecting the speakers as they were given their limited time of...
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losinghopeny
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3
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378
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Recovery Question
(Preview)
ABF has been going to AA 8 months now.. missing some meetings here and there. Has not been drinking anywhere close to how he drank a year ago. It is obvious he understands he is an alcoholic and has made many improvements. But I notice he is starting to drink just one day a week now. (he justifies it with a sl...
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Aerin
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3
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334
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Finally told my family
(Preview)
For those of you that have followed my posts, my husband has been pretty out of control with his drinking for close to two years (shortly after the birth of our daughter) - we have had flare ups with his drinking before that but nothing this severe and he was able to pull back. This past stint has lasted si...
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VickiR
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7
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672
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I can't believe how much I miss him.
(Preview)
It has been 3 months since I have spoke to him. I can not believe how much I miss him. I honestly feel that the pain will never go away. That I will never feel like I belong. Not like I do with him. Now I know how rediculous and emotional this sounds. I am jusy trying to work through all of this mess.
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tealfighter
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6
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369
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Spontaneous recovery from heroin addiction?
(Preview)
Hi
Can you tell me a little about spontaneous recovery from heroin addiction? I'm so confused.Always thought opioid addicts needed treatment or some type of recovery support system like AA or NA in order to maintain long-term sobriety. I have a niece who was a heroin addict for three years and says...
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Turbos02
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31
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493
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Alcoholic Sibling 302 and Custody Issues
(Preview)
I'm grateful I found this room, and I intend to also get to some local meetings as my life is being affected by my alcoholic, and perhaps bipolar, brother who is 46. This is the second time in his life that he is homeless and is the process of divorce and custody of his daughter who just turned 4. For the last...
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kdawg
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2
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370
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Im Back !!
(Preview)
ive been away from the board while in transit to my new home which belongs to my boyfriend. he has never had a girlfriend live with him. he is a total packrat and ive been busy cleaning and sorting just to feel comfortable here. we have had a few spats but ive used alot of alanon tools. i got my disability so n...
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YARNCRAZY
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7
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2384
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