The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
The ODA T reading for May 7 points out that Al-Anon's main purpose is to help those living in an alcoholic situation. To that purpose, we are each helped by sharing our experience ,strength and hope. We don't and should not give advise or attempt to solve others financial or emotional issues. This is not helping!!!
We believe that we help best by inspiring people to think through and solve their own problems. Otherwise we deprive them of the opportunity to develop experience and strength in working things out themselves. We need and want inspiration and emotional support from those in the group because we know that the program has been their source of growth. We accept that we must not lean on them for help but must face our own problems . This is so even outside the program we should not interfere with the life of another even though I am motivated only my desire to help."
I love the principles outlined and adhered to in program. We do not give advice, we do not judge or gossip about another instead we let the love of the program grows within each I can see how this works each time I attend a meeting and feel the love and concern.
Good morning Betty and happy Sunday to you.....thank you for the daily, your ESH and your service. I am grateful that my group does adhere to these principles closely and gently redirects each of us to focus on self vs. the alcoholic/qualifier. If anyone would have warned me or advised me to run for the hills before marrying my A, I would not have listened and added to my insanity and resentments! I tend to avoid those who give advice directly or indirectly and instead align as best I can with those who are truly working this program and sharing their own Experience, Strength and Hope.
I am amazed almost daily by the miracle of recovery. Folks I never thought stood a chance to live sober have come out on the other side. Those with many years in recovery that I admired relapsed. It's truly what is suggested - a daily reprieve from the disease based on spiritual conditioning. This so applies to both sides of the room.
I have been a rebellion for as long as I can remember, so avoiding advice-giving isn't too hard. Where I had to make some changes is in the giving - I was one who did this often before recovery and also felt strongly about my experience being the 'only' experience or most likely. It's very freeing to be able to share my experience, if I have any and completely let go of what another does with it.
Make it a great day - off to play softball in a short while - make it a great day!!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
