Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Iwantthemiddle · Iwantthemiddle

This afternoon we are going to a family function. Iâm going with my AH and his mother and golden child sister are coming along. They gossip and just talk crap and really donât stop talking. Itâs always about people I donât know and I think why would I want to know? Iâm just struggling with setting boundar...

Freetime · Freetime

The writer shares how the way we keep our home shows the effects of living with alcoholism. One person cannot feel comfortable unless his house is perfectly tidy, which makes him feel in control. Another person lives with clutter, which allows her to isolate and keep people at a distance. The write...

ling · ling

Hi AH very ill. He pushed me so have restriction order not to live at home. He's in his tiny workshop. It's unsafe as workshop. Can an alcoholic give up as he says he's trying but too hard??? Is it that he can't or doesn't want to? I've taken him a duvet and pillow. I need a break. Do I feed him? Where's my resp...

Surfergirl · Surfergirl

I have family visiting for the week and tonight we are ordering dinner as a pre anniversary-post birthday celebration. My AH said he was going to join us but I didn't get my hopes up. About 20 minutes before we are preparing to order he messages and says "I'm not coming it's taking too long" which is code f...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

Hi Everyone, I just wanted to say that I was contacted by HR for to meet this week with them and my boss. I don't know if this is a follow up to my meeting with HR about how my job is going which included discussion of many hours being left to sit with no work to lack of promised training. There has also been load...

mamalioness · mamalioness

I worked today and had a run in with a co-worker, whom I usually get along nicely with....She got ugly with me and I "outed her" about it......I called her on it....I told her that her behaviour was NOT acceptable, rudeness and ugly are never acceptable..no matter what...insults and put downs I will N...

DavidG · DavidG

The price we pay for being with family is emotion... and my FOO did not learn to express emotion in healthy ways... I owe my life to my hometown group... and a life worth living- surely... ...I always maintained my balance in group- in the rooms- by doing my own personal shares. in my small town it was ha...

lookingup · lookingup

for those here that know of my apt moving, ive done all I know to do on my part,phone calls,talking to landlord,along with lots of prayers to my hp on the what when and how part to all this, this was becoming very overwhelming to me thoughts of going from a big house to small apt,ha, with hp help only can make...

Iwantthemiddle · Iwantthemiddle

Hi everyone. Iâm in need of some examples of boundary setting. Iâm really bad at it. Yesterday my mil made us dinner and dropped in to see me at work to give me morning tea. Nice right? However there is always an alterior motive. My husband never calls his Mum. I was never aware until recently that I contro...

A nother · A nother

Husband couldn't hide his enthusiasm for putting the new bed up, so we did it tonight. He is sober tonight. I think this is his way of showing me how relieved he is to be rid of his nagging wife! Painful. I feel so rejected, which makes no sense because I want out of this relationship too!

A nother · A nother

I know I'm posting loads on here, and that much of it isn't enlightened or helpful to others, but I honestly don't know where else to go to sort my feelings out. I can't sleep. I've tried and tried, but it just won't come. My husband went out to the pub tonight. No big traumas when he came home, which I am gr...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's reading in Courage to Change, the author reflects on step 6: Were entirely ready to have HP remove these defects of character. The author shares that they worried whether there would be anything left of themselves if they let go of the defects of character, but decided that the...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning Everyone- Today's reading is about applying the tools we are given in a way that is helpful to our situation. The writer explains that there was a job he/she was not happy with at all; day after day they did the job, relying on Just for Today to get through it. After some time the realizatio...

andromeda · andromeda

So, my Al Anon girlfriends and myself were talking last week about dating alcoholics. We had a speaker at one of our meetings who talked about how she always managed to find the alcoholics on a group of men. ALWAYS. After 2 marriages to practicing alcoholics with no recovery, she was 60 years old when...

DavidG · DavidG

I have this movie at home. I bought the DVD in the Wilson's own garage- at Stepping Stones. in NY state. Early on I read "Lois Remembers". I was always interested in how our hope evolved... and manifested itself... with love... foe many years I fancied Lois and Bill as my mum and dad. Bonded, rather than...

Mcgreuder · Mcgreuder

Permalink Hi guys! Im back again. Really trying to work on some boundaries and having trouble. Im at work today and husband is at home with kids. Husband was out drinking til 3:30, and twin 21 mo olds were up and playing since 6:30 am. He didnt go in there to change their diaper and waited til nanny came a...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODAT reading for 8-7 Speaks about using the slogans and suggest keeping one at the forefront of our mind every day so that our troubles do not crowded out program principles. The reading points out the slogan "let go and let God" suggests that more tightly clutching our problems to our thoughts...

A nother · A nother

And I am so relieved! No tense silences tonight! I know I'm sick, but I had to share.

A nother · A nother

I went to my first face to face meeting today. I'm a bit embarrassed about it because every time I needed to speak I started crying and my voice kind of wailed, even when I only had to read one of the steps. I feel much calmer now though, and kind of wish I'd shared because I could relate to the topic. It was ab...

Elabella · Elabella

So it's been a while since I last posted anything. Lots has happened since then. The situation with my AH got so bad, after several police calls, me getting hit in the face by a giant box that he hurled in my direction during one of his crazy, drunken rage-filled outbursts-he finally agreed that he neede...

Surfergirl · Surfergirl

I remember someone mentioning a book about living with an alcoholic spouse but can't for the life of me remember the title. Anyone? I have a long wait at the hospital this week so I figured I would use my time wisely. Any other suggestions would be great too. Thanks!

JustForMeNow · JustForMeNow

I'm very new to this. I have no background with alcoholism or addiction. I'm taking a crash course with my husband. I have 2 children, 11 and 7. While he told our 11 year old daughter I feel like both kids need to know more. He isn't taking responsibility like he said he would and he has been very angry and...

Lyne · Lyne

Courage & Freedom-The writer today speaks of courage and freedom that he has been given through having a Higher Power. Where he once hesitated and felt helpless, has changed into recognizing that a miracle has already happened. His Higher Power gives him a freedom to make choices, and he is no...

A nother · A nother

Hi again. My husband has decided to plan ahead for a wedding he is attending next week and book himself into the hotel. I have a night away from him (I desperately want to move into my own place with the children so i am completely away from his chaos, but have agreed to wait 6 months so he can get used to the id...

Overcome · Overcome

August 6, 2018MONDAY MORNING AL-ANON MEETING 9 AM EST (6AM PACIFIC)Topic: Is it pity, love or co-dependence. How to know the difference. The 3 A's: Awareness, Acceptance, Action. Open topic as it relates to alcoholism and living with the alcoholic.The website link to the group meeting room is ht...

hotrod · hotrod

A Business meeting was held in the alanon chat room 8- 5i n order to review on line meeting protocols and obtain directions as to "ops status and establish char responsibilities. We discussed banning members or booting them from the chat room and it was agreed that these tools must only be used in dr...

Mcgreuder · Mcgreuder

This is my first experience with al-anon. My husband is not a full-blown alcoholic, but it doesn't seem that there are any outlets (except possibly here) to discuss my issues and get ideas of how to deal with him. He drinks most nights...a few beers if it's a work night, more on weekends. He has these...

hotrod · hotrod

Posting this reading overview for Looking up The Odat reading for today, 8-4 speaks about our our unrealistic expectations of others and ourselves. It points out by relying on this "Defect" we often become angry and DISAPPOINTED because other do not live up to OUR expectations, i have found th...

WestMan · WestMan

Hi all. Been a minute since I last came in here. Just to recap I'm single-dad, ExAW seems to be continuing in recovery and has the kids about 40% of the time. I moved us back in from the country so that we could be closer to work and their school. The kids go to a charter school in our town. I have three kids olde...

DavidG · DavidG

Hi y'all, I wasn't broken when i came here- but my home group was. My mum always taught me- when we get bucked off a horse- get straight back on. If my Alanon group was a horse- I needed to tend to the bleeding and bruises first- before getting back on. I knew when I came- that MIP Alanon did not have a...

Connection · Connection

thank you

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

So, it's been a LONG two weeks between hormones, oldest going to hospital and youngest going to visit friends, my dad popping up from the dead is what a couple friends are saying, I am going through other stuff as well. I am just highly overwhelmed and yet ok too. Yesterday another what I call forest fi...

Iwantthemiddle · Iwantthemiddle

Hi everyone, so I finally had the chance to attend a f2f Al-Anon meeting last night but it was cancelled :( so I attended the AA meeting instead as I was invited to stay. So I find it hard calling my Dad, Mum and husband alcoholics. When I listened to the alcoholics last night they drank day in day out all day...

bud · bud

Hi MIP family, I'm writing from Alaska, where I've enjoyed working the past week. I love it here and am feeling really blessed! I have mixed feelings left over from when my sister called me the other day. She's unstable and looking for attention. I've told her many times that I do not wish to receive phon...

A nother · A nother

I'm new to this so please be gentle. I rang Al anon a few weeks ago who gave me the details of a local meeting, but I've 3 children under 10 and daren't leave them at the moment. I will sort something out after the holidays though. I could do with some advice though, because I can't think clearly at the mome...

Aloha · Aloha

I am so glad I remembered the MIP message board. I don't know why it fell off my radar for a couple of years, but so glad to be back. One thing I had fun doing was going back and viewing my old posts from my very first post here (back in 2007!), which reminded me that I had started getting unsettled by the alcoho...

hotrod · hotrod

Reply Quote More Group Business meeting will be held Sunday 8-5 in the Chat Room at 8 PM -- after the regular meeting- We will discuss meeting chairs schedule and any other topic you feel is necessary- See you there

Freetime · Freetime

The writer talks about moving from denial of the alcoholism in her family, to making the family disease the subject of all her conversations. A fellow Al-Anon member pointed out that if we keep living in the past, we are not living in the present. Unlocking the secrets of the past is not meant to place b...

PosiesandPuppies · PosiesandPuppies

I saw this today and it moved me... I wish I would've seen it when I was questioning if I was doing the right thing a few months back. Since I know we all go through those times of doubt, and that doubt sometimes keeps us "stuck" in re-living the "good times" with our qualifiers so that we can't see another wa...

Hsquared · Hsquared

My partner, or ex-partner possibly, admitted he is an alcoholic and wants to seek help to stop drinking. This happened after he blacked out and woke up with somebody else. He has no recollection, but was clearly functioning throughout the night. Do I believe him that he doesnt remember or had ill-int...

ling · ling

Feel horrible. I can't accept that AH loves drink more than me. My tolerance has gone. Everything's gone down the pan. I'm in torment because I love him immensely. He will always drink and lie. If he gives up he maye drink again and I can't do it as I hate drink so much. I can't deal with it.

Iamhere · Iamhere

Tomorrow's reading talks about the 2nd tradition of Al-Anon - "For our group purpose there is but one authority - a loving God as He may express himself in our group conscience. Our leaders are but trusted servants; they do not govern." The writer shares that often our desire for control can play out i...

leannecph · leannecph

My husband is taking Antabuse to stop him from drinking Vodka. Were on day 8 and going well with the alcohol. Though I suspect he is only managing to not drink because he is buying (his other problem) drugs - cocaine specifically. He has been very affectionate the last few nights and thought it was do...

Dancer66 · Dancer66

So my husband who is a problem drinker the other day majorly blew up at me. I had come back from gym in evening after working and he was drinking watching sports in front room with the kids (teens) and he was on the loud side. So I just went in back room, had dinner watched TV. My kids left to go out for a littl...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's Courage to Change, the author shares that they first came to Al-Anon to discover how to get a loved one to stop drinking. The author hoped that their life would them return to normal. Through time in Al-Anon, the author realized the 3 C's (We didn't cause our loved one to drink, we c...

mamalioness · mamalioness

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!! To our Betty!!!! To the lady who isn't just a moderator extraordinaire, but a friend indeed..A shining example of the program and what miracles it can bring To somebody who speaks her truth and does it with strength, yet softly To the lady who can make anyone feel better..Want t...

hotrod · hotrod

H4T's today's daily reading speaks about the 3rd and 11th step. It said "learned in my study of Step Three that 'will' referes to our thoughts and feelings and the 'lives' refers to our actions. When I pray in accordance with the Eleventh Step, I am asking to know what thoughts and feelings God wants me t...

hopefulmom1 · hopefulmom1

I am finding myself in a difficult situation and for the first time I am really allowing myself to figure out and speak my own feelings without worry about how he will handle the information. Here is a little backstory (sorry if it is so long). My husband has been abusing alcohol since my twins were bor...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

A couple of days ago my husband & I got into a car accident. It was in a city 60 miles away from home. Anyhow, we didn't get hurt & it wasn't our fault. We were at a gas station, had already got our gas & were pulling out of the parking lot. A guy backed up into us. We don't have a chance t really get ou...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

It has really been a hell of a two week period around here. I can't put my finger on it. I have sort of been reading boards I plan on listening to podcasts this weekend, I'll be driving 1/2 way to meet my bff and drop youngest off for a week with his friend and then we will be trying to get boy registered for hi...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

It's been awhile since I've posted an update about my work situation with my awful supervisor. Another person was added to our dept. and my boss is giving this person some of the work that was meant for me. I have not been there very long and my boss has not taught me all I need to fully perform the job of the p...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

I just want to share my personal experience with grief and forgiveness. If you're in pain due to emotional and or physical abandonment, I can relate to those feelings. I can remember having so much resentment toward my alcoholic father for how he treated me and our family. I was the scapegoat in the fam...

Lyne · Lyne

Happiness-The writer reflects upon his choice to be happy. He believes he needs to make a firmer commitment to his decision to be happy, and not abandon his choice when trouble hits. A commitment takes discipline, and it requires breaking old habits like becoming a helpless victim. He points out...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning Everyone: Todays reading is about the power, strength and hope of step two, in which we came to believe a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. One of the reasons I love this step so much is the humility that is behind it. There is a hopefulness in it too- that what we are pu...

Lyne · Lyne

In a few minutes , I am leaving for oral surgery. In the past, I would have been a complete basket case. I wouldn't have slept for a week, and I would be sick literally, to face this procedure. I am a little hungry, and I am a little nervous, but this is the calmest I have been in my entire life facing a medic...

hotrod · hotrod

Step 8 has been posted to the Step Board. Please join in and share your thoughts http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t64827137/alanon-step-8-7-29-2018/ Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on th...

lookingup · lookingup

,this writer speaks about how a stonecutter strikes a rock 99 times without a crack on the surface,then on the 100th blow the stone splits in two,it wasn't the final blow that did the trick but all that had gone before. same is true with alanon recovery,whatever I'm struggling with ,learning to detac...

lookingup · lookingup

Here's my update on my daughter and family, we now can talk on phones everyday without messenger ,where is before only way for us to communicate for 4 yrs while they were stationed with air force in Japan, now daughter and husband ,3 g,sons are stationed in Las Vegas ,Nevada , we can actually talk over p...

Mcat54 · Mcat54

H left early this a.m. for a brunch 1.5 hrs away with son. I found his money clip on kitchen counter. He misplaces keys, glasses, wallet, etc., frequently. I have been Ms. Find It for way too long. His son gave him a set of tags and an app to help him find stuff but he hasn't set it for anything besides keys....

DavidG · DavidG

Ah done it yesterday... at last... I have bin doing Odat and C2C reading here- to get prepared... but I have booked a room- for a monthly meeting... I have done group startin' before... with weekly meetings. Our town had 1000 people when I began Alanon 37 years ago... now it has about 4000. But sitting...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Anxious :( (Preview) This afternoon we are going to a family function. Iâm going with my AH and his mother and golden child sister are coming along. They gossip and just talk crap and really donât stop talking. Itâs always about people I donât know and I think why would I want to know? Iâm just struggling with setting boundar...	Iwantthemiddle	5	611	Aug 11, 2018 by lookingup
	Courage to Change 8/10 (Preview) The writer shares how the way we keep our home shows the effects of living with alcoholism. One person cannot feel comfortable unless his house is perfectly tidy, which makes him feel in control. Another person lives with clutter, which allows her to isolate and keep people at a distance. The write...	Freetime	4	644	Aug 10, 2018 by Iamhere
	AH very ill (Preview) Hi AH very ill. He pushed me so have restriction order not to live at home. He's in his tiny workshop. It's unsafe as workshop. Can an alcoholic give up as he says he's trying but too hard??? Is it that he can't or doesn't want to? I've taken him a duvet and pillow. I need a break. Do I feed him? Where's my resp...	ling	5	602	Aug 10, 2018 by Iamhere
	Frustrated (Preview) I have family visiting for the week and tonight we are ordering dinner as a pre anniversary-post birthday celebration. My AH said he was going to join us but I didn't get my hopes up. About 20 minutes before we are preparing to order he messages and says "I'm not coming it's taking too long" which is code f...	Surfergirl	27	793	Aug 10, 2018 by Bo
	Meeting with HR ( 1 2 ) (closed) (Preview) Hi Everyone, I just wanted to say that I was contacted by HR for to meet this week with them and my boss. I don't know if this is a follow up to my meeting with HR about how my job is going which included discussion of many hours being left to sit with no work to lack of promised training. There has also been load...	tiredtonite	51	3590	Aug 10, 2018 by SerenityRUS
	We really do teach others how to treat us (Preview) I worked today and had a run in with a co-worker, whom I usually get along nicely with....She got ugly with me and I "outed her" about it......I called her on it....I told her that her behaviour was NOT acceptable, rudeness and ugly are never acceptable..no matter what...insults and put downs I will N...	mamalioness	18	735	Aug 10, 2018 by mamalioness
	Boiled up with anger over old things... (Preview) The price we pay for being with family is emotion... and my FOO did not learn to express emotion in healthy ways... I owe my life to my hometown group... and a life worth living- surely... ...I always maintained my balance in group- in the rooms- by doing my own personal shares. in my small town it was ha...	DavidG	17	730	Aug 10, 2018 by Aline
	Update (Preview) for those here that know of my apt moving, ive done all I know to do on my part,phone calls,talking to landlord,along with lots of prayers to my hp on the what when and how part to all this, this was becoming very overwhelming to me thoughts of going from a big house to small apt,ha, with hp help only can make...	lookingup	10	595	Aug 9, 2018 by lookingup
	Mother in law detachment and boundaries (Preview) Hi everyone. Iâm in need of some examples of boundary setting. Iâm really bad at it. Yesterday my mil made us dinner and dropped in to see me at work to give me morning tea. Nice right? However there is always an alterior motive. My husband never calls his Mum. I was never aware until recently that I contro...	Iwantthemiddle	3	701	Aug 9, 2018 by Bo
	The new bed is up, the mattress arrives tomorrow. (Preview) Husband couldn't hide his enthusiasm for putting the new bed up, so we did it tonight. He is sober tonight. I think this is his way of showing me how relieved he is to be rid of his nagging wife! Painful. I feel so rejected, which makes no sense because I want out of this relationship too!	A nother	3	607	Aug 9, 2018 by Bo
	I'm having another sleepless night (Preview) I know I'm posting loads on here, and that much of it isn't enlightened or helpful to others, but I honestly don't know where else to go to sort my feelings out. I can't sleep. I've tried and tried, but it just won't come. My husband went out to the pub tonight. No big traumas when he came home, which I am gr...	A nother	10	737	Aug 9, 2018 by mamalioness
	Courage to Change August 8 2018 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's reading in Courage to Change, the author reflects on step 6: Were entirely ready to have HP remove these defects of character. The author shares that they worried whether there would be anything left of themselves if they let go of the defects of character, but decided that the...	Skorpi	3	750	Aug 8, 2018 by Iamhere
	Hope for Today Aug 5 (Preview) Good morning Everyone- Today's reading is about applying the tools we are given in a way that is helpful to our situation. The writer explains that there was a job he/she was not happy with at all; day after day they did the job, relying on Just for Today to get through it. After some time the realizatio...	yanksfan51	7	671	Aug 8, 2018 by A nother
	Would you date an alcoholic who has a recovery program? (Preview) So, my Al Anon girlfriends and myself were talking last week about dating alcoholics. We had a speaker at one of our meetings who talked about how she always managed to find the alcoholics on a group of men. ALWAYS. After 2 marriages to practicing alcoholics with no recovery, she was 60 years old when...	andromeda	18	794	Aug 8, 2018 by Green Eyes
	Our founders... (Preview) I have this movie at home. I bought the DVD in the Wilson's own garage- at Stepping Stones. in NY state. Early on I read "Lois Remembers". I was always interested in how our hope evolved... and manifested itself... with love... foe many years I fancied Lois and Bill as my mum and dad. Bonded, rather than...	DavidG	3	622	Aug 8, 2018 by DavidG
	What boundary do I set for my husband? (Preview) Permalink Hi guys! Im back again. Really trying to work on some boundaries and having trouble. Im at work today and husband is at home with kids. Husband was out drinking til 3:30, and twin 21 mo olds were up and playing since 6:30 am. He didnt go in there to change their diaper and waited til nanny came a...	Mcgreuder	6	654	Aug 7, 2018 by Bo
	ODAT Reading 8-7 (Preview) The ODAT reading for 8-7 Speaks about using the slogans and suggest keeping one at the forefront of our mind every day so that our troubles do not crowded out program principles. The reading points out the slogan "let go and let God" suggests that more tightly clutching our problems to our thoughts...	hotrod	4	538	Aug 7, 2018 by mamalioness
	He's 'nipped down the road for an hour' (Preview) And I am so relieved! No tense silences tonight! I know I'm sick, but I had to share.	A nother	5	567	Aug 7, 2018 by mamalioness
	I couldn't share in my first meeting, so I'm putting it here. (Preview) I went to my first face to face meeting today. I'm a bit embarrassed about it because every time I needed to speak I started crying and my voice kind of wailed, even when I only had to read one of the steps. I feel much calmer now though, and kind of wish I'd shared because I could relate to the topic. It was ab...	A nother	10	603	Aug 7, 2018 by Bo
	Focussing on me- major life changes... (Preview) So it's been a while since I last posted anything. Lots has happened since then. The situation with my AH got so bad, after several police calls, me getting hit in the face by a giant box that he hurled in my direction during one of his crazy, drunken rage-filled outbursts-he finally agreed that he neede...	Elabella	10	611	Aug 7, 2018 by JerryF
	Reading material (Preview) I remember someone mentioning a book about living with an alcoholic spouse but can't for the life of me remember the title. Anyone? I have a long wait at the hospital this week so I figured I would use my time wisely. Any other suggestions would be great too. Thanks!	Surfergirl	11	657	Aug 6, 2018 by Surfergirl
	talking to children (Preview) I'm very new to this. I have no background with alcoholism or addiction. I'm taking a crash course with my husband. I have 2 children, 11 and 7. While he told our 11 year old daughter I feel like both kids need to know more. He isn't taking responsibility like he said he would and he has been very angry and...	JustForMeNow	6	446	Aug 6, 2018 by JustForMeNow
	C2C, 8/6 (Preview) Courage & Freedom-The writer today speaks of courage and freedom that he has been given through having a Higher Power. Where he once hesitated and felt helpless, has changed into recognizing that a miracle has already happened. His Higher Power gives him a freedom to make choices, and he is no...	Lyne	4	420	Aug 6, 2018 by Iamhere
	What do you do to keep focused on yourself? (Preview) Hi again. My husband has decided to plan ahead for a wedding he is attending next week and book himself into the hotel. I have a night away from him (I desperately want to move into my own place with the children so i am completely away from his chaos, but have agreed to wait 6 months so he can get used to the id...	A nother	5	547	Aug 6, 2018 by Aloha
	Monday morning meeting starting now in chat (Preview) August 6, 2018MONDAY MORNING AL-ANON MEETING 9 AM EST (6AM PACIFIC)Topic: Is it pity, love or co-dependence. How to know the difference. The 3 A's: Awareness, Acceptance, Action. Open topic as it relates to alcoholism and living with the alcoholic.The website link to the group meeting room is ht...	Overcome	1	385	Aug 6, 2018 by hotrod
	Business meeting (Preview) A Business meeting was held in the alanon chat room 8- 5i n order to review on line meeting protocols and obtain directions as to "ops status and establish char responsibilities. We discussed banning members or booting them from the chat room and it was agreed that these tools must only be used in dr...	hotrod	2	375	Aug 5, 2018 by hotrod
	Binge Drinking Husband (Preview) This is my first experience with al-anon. My husband is not a full-blown alcoholic, but it doesn't seem that there are any outlets (except possibly here) to discuss my issues and get ideas of how to deal with him. He drinks most nights...a few beers if it's a work night, more on weekends. He has these...	Mcgreuder	38	12385	Aug 5, 2018 by Mcgreuder
	ODAT reading for 8-4 (Preview) Posting this reading overview for Looking up The Odat reading for today, 8-4 speaks about our our unrealistic expectations of others and ourselves. It points out by relying on this "Defect" we often become angry and DISAPPOINTED because other do not live up to OUR expectations, i have found th...	hotrod	4	405	Aug 5, 2018 by lookingup
	Decision was made but still struggling with it. (Preview) Hi all. Been a minute since I last came in here. Just to recap I'm single-dad, ExAW seems to be continuing in recovery and has the kids about 40% of the time. I moved us back in from the country so that we could be closer to work and their school. The kids go to a charter school in our town. I have three kids olde...	WestMan	9	1676	Aug 4, 2018 by PosiesandPuppies
	Alanon is the power of many... (Preview) Hi y'all, I wasn't broken when i came here- but my home group was. My mum always taught me- when we get bucked off a horse- get straight back on. If my Alanon group was a horse- I needed to tend to the bleeding and bruises first- before getting back on. I knew when I came- that MIP Alanon did not have a...	DavidG	8	528	Aug 4, 2018 by hotrod
	can someone let me know when the online meetings are held. I could use some supprt (Preview) thank you	Connection	2	481	Aug 4, 2018 by Overcome
	Update on 2 Weeks .. lol (Preview) So, it's been a LONG two weeks between hormones, oldest going to hospital and youngest going to visit friends, my dad popping up from the dead is what a couple friends are saying, I am going through other stuff as well. I am just highly overwhelmed and yet ok too. Yesterday another what I call forest fi...	SerenityRUS	8	499	Aug 4, 2018 by andromeda
	Alcoholic or not alcoholic (Preview) Hi everyone, so I finally had the chance to attend a f2f Al-Anon meeting last night but it was cancelled :( so I attended the AA meeting instead as I was invited to stay. So I find it hard calling my Dad, Mum and husband alcoholics. When I listened to the alcoholics last night they drank day in day out all day...	Iwantthemiddle	13	926	Aug 3, 2018 by Kcsnooze
	Need help with forgiveness please (Preview) Hi MIP family, I'm writing from Alaska, where I've enjoyed working the past week. I love it here and am feeling really blessed! I have mixed feelings left over from when my sister called me the other day. She's unstable and looking for attention. I've told her many times that I do not wish to receive phon...	bud	15	2260	Aug 3, 2018 by bud
	There's a wedding coming up, I don't want to go. ( 1 2 ) (Preview) I'm new to this so please be gentle. I rang Al anon a few weeks ago who gave me the details of a local meeting, but I've 3 children under 10 and daren't leave them at the moment. I will sort something out after the holidays though. I could do with some advice though, because I can't think clearly at the mome...	A nother	60	2932	Aug 3, 2018 by DavidG
	This message board is a treasture-trove (Preview) I am so glad I remembered the MIP message board. I don't know why it fell off my radar for a couple of years, but so glad to be back. One thing I had fun doing was going back and viewing my old posts from my very first post here (back in 2007!), which reminded me that I had started getting unsettled by the alcoho...	Aloha	4	458	Aug 3, 2018 by Iamhere
	Business meeting (Preview) Reply Quote More Group Business meeting will be held Sunday 8-5 in the Chat Room at 8 PM -- after the regular meeting- We will discuss meeting chairs schedule and any other topic you feel is necessary- See you there	hotrod	1	405	Aug 3, 2018 by Iamhere
	C2C 8/3 (Preview) The writer talks about moving from denial of the alcoholism in her family, to making the family disease the subject of all her conversations. A fellow Al-Anon member pointed out that if we keep living in the past, we are not living in the present. Unlocking the secrets of the past is not meant to place b...	Freetime	3	421	Aug 3, 2018 by Iamhere
	Good quotes (Preview) I saw this today and it moved me... I wish I would've seen it when I was questioning if I was doing the right thing a few months back. Since I know we all go through those times of doubt, and that doubt sometimes keeps us "stuck" in re-living the "good times" with our qualifiers so that we can't see another wa...	PosiesandPuppies	6	2007	Aug 2, 2018 by PosiesandPuppies
	Advice needed (Preview) My partner, or ex-partner possibly, admitted he is an alcoholic and wants to seek help to stop drinking. This happened after he blacked out and woke up with somebody else. He has no recollection, but was clearly functioning throughout the night. Do I believe him that he doesnt remember or had ill-int...	Hsquared	9	1058	Aug 2, 2018 by Bo
	feeling angry and upset (Preview) Feel horrible. I can't accept that AH loves drink more than me. My tolerance has gone. Everything's gone down the pan. I'm in torment because I love him immensely. He will always drink and lie. If he gives up he maye drink again and I can't do it as I hate drink so much. I can't deal with it.	ling	4	920	Aug 2, 2018 by JerryF
	Courage to Change 8/2/18 (Preview) Tomorrow's reading talks about the 2nd tradition of Al-Anon - "For our group purpose there is but one authority - a loving God as He may express himself in our group conscience. Our leaders are but trusted servants; they do not govern." The writer shares that often our desire for control can play out i...	Iamhere	2	572	Aug 2, 2018 by PosiesandPuppies
	unsure of what to say or not to say (Preview) My husband is taking Antabuse to stop him from drinking Vodka. Were on day 8 and going well with the alcohol. Though I suspect he is only managing to not drink because he is buying (his other problem) drugs - cocaine specifically. He has been very affectionate the last few nights and thought it was do...	leannecph	3	717	Aug 2, 2018 by JerryF
	What to do when they blow up? (Preview) So my husband who is a problem drinker the other day majorly blew up at me. I had come back from gym in evening after working and he was drinking watching sports in front room with the kids (teens) and he was on the loud side. So I just went in back room, had dinner watched TV. My kids left to go out for a littl...	Dancer66	16	1399	Aug 1, 2018 by Bo
	Courage to Change August 1 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's Courage to Change, the author shares that they first came to Al-Anon to discover how to get a loved one to stop drinking. The author hoped that their life would them return to normal. Through time in Al-Anon, the author realized the 3 C's (We didn't cause our loved one to drink, we c...	Skorpi	4	2155	Aug 1, 2018 by PosiesandPuppies
	Happy birthday to Betty (Preview) HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!! To our Betty!!!! To the lady who isn't just a moderator extraordinaire, but a friend indeed..A shining example of the program and what miracles it can bring To somebody who speaks her truth and does it with strength, yet softly To the lady who can make anyone feel better..Want t...	mamalioness	17	689	Aug 1, 2018 by hotrod
	HFT 7-31 (Preview) H4T's today's daily reading speaks about the 3rd and 11th step. It said "learned in my study of Step Three that 'will' referes to our thoughts and feelings and the 'lives' refers to our actions. When I pray in accordance with the Eleventh Step, I am asking to know what thoughts and feelings God wants me t...	hotrod	3	856	Jul 31, 2018 by Iamhere
	How to move on from a difficult situtaion (Preview) I am finding myself in a difficult situation and for the first time I am really allowing myself to figure out and speak my own feelings without worry about how he will handle the information. Here is a little backstory (sorry if it is so long). My husband has been abusing alcohol since my twins were bor...	hopefulmom1	6	973	Jul 31, 2018 by joker
	got in a minor car accident... (Preview) A couple of days ago my husband & I got into a car accident. It was in a city 60 miles away from home. Anyhow, we didn't get hurt & it wasn't our fault. We were at a gas station, had already got our gas & were pulling out of the parking lot. A guy backed up into us. We don't have a chance t really get ou...	Hoot Nanny	7	1703	Jul 31, 2018 by hotrod
	Rough two weeks (Preview) It has really been a hell of a two week period around here. I can't put my finger on it. I have sort of been reading boards I plan on listening to podcasts this weekend, I'll be driving 1/2 way to meet my bff and drop youngest off for a week with his friend and then we will be trying to get boy registered for hi...	SerenityRUS	11	2383	Jul 30, 2018 by PosiesandPuppies
	Continuing to take care of myself at work (closed) (Preview) It's been awhile since I've posted an update about my work situation with my awful supervisor. Another person was added to our dept. and my boss is giving this person some of the work that was meant for me. I have not been there very long and my boss has not taught me all I need to fully perform the job of the p...	tiredtonite	18	2413	Jul 30, 2018 by tiredtonite
	Forgiving My Father (Preview) I just want to share my personal experience with grief and forgiveness. If you're in pain due to emotional and or physical abandonment, I can relate to those feelings. I can remember having so much resentment toward my alcoholic father for how he treated me and our family. I was the scapegoat in the fam...	tiredtonite	7	771	Jul 30, 2018 by SerenityRUS
	C2C, 7/30 (Preview) Happiness-The writer reflects upon his choice to be happy. He believes he needs to make a firmer commitment to his decision to be happy, and not abandon his choice when trouble hits. A commitment takes discipline, and it requires breaking old habits like becoming a helpless victim. He points out...	Lyne	4	1627	Jul 30, 2018 by PosiesandPuppies
	Hope For Today July 29 (Preview) Good morning Everyone: Todays reading is about the power, strength and hope of step two, in which we came to believe a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. One of the reasons I love this step so much is the humility that is behind it. There is a hopefulness in it too- that what we are pu...	yanksfan51	4	365	Jul 29, 2018 by PosiesandPuppies
	Oral surgery (Preview) In a few minutes , I am leaving for oral surgery. In the past, I would have been a complete basket case. I wouldn't have slept for a week, and I would be sick literally, to face this procedure. I am a little hungry, and I am a little nervous, but this is the calmest I have been in my entire life facing a medic...	Lyne	12	1071	Jul 29, 2018 by tiredtonite
	Step 8 (Preview) Step 8 has been posted to the Step Board. Please join in and share your thoughts http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t64827137/alanon-step-8-7-29-2018/ Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on th...	hotrod	0	558	Jul 29, 2018 by hotrod
	CTC 7/28 (Preview) ,this writer speaks about how a stonecutter strikes a rock 99 times without a crack on the surface,then on the 100th blow the stone splits in two,it wasn't the final blow that did the trick but all that had gone before. same is true with alanon recovery,whatever I'm struggling with ,learning to detac...	lookingup	7	910	Jul 28, 2018 by Aline
	Daughter and family (Preview) Here's my update on my daughter and family, we now can talk on phones everyday without messenger ,where is before only way for us to communicate for 4 yrs while they were stationed with air force in Japan, now daughter and husband ,3 g,sons are stationed in Las Vegas ,Nevada , we can actually talk over p...	lookingup	6	2226	Jul 28, 2018 by DavidG
	Golden rule vs enabling/rescuing (Preview) H left early this a.m. for a brunch 1.5 hrs away with son. I found his money clip on kitchen counter. He misplaces keys, glasses, wallet, etc., frequently. I have been Ms. Find It for way too long. His son gave him a set of tags and an app to help him find stuff but he hasn't set it for anything besides keys....	Mcat54	14	3370	Jul 27, 2018 by Bo
	Step 12... (Preview) Ah done it yesterday... at last... I have bin doing Odat and C2C reading here- to get prepared... but I have booked a room- for a monthly meeting... I have done group startin' before... with weekly meetings. Our town had 1000 people when I began Alanon 37 years ago... now it has about 4000. But sitting...	DavidG	11	1018	Jul 27, 2018 by DavidG
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.