The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
The ODAT reading for July 24 speaks about entering an alanon meeting for the first time The reading points out that we are often confused, and feel as if we are drowning in a sea of trouble
The reading suggest that members offer a warm welcome and be grateful for this newer member as they will allow us many opportunities to share our message of recovery and to grow as we do.
I am off on vacation for a week so i posted this message day early. Be well an keep on keeping on .
Enjoy your vacation Betty - thank you for the daily, your service and your ESH too. I remember my first meeting and I did not want to return! It was a large group and they asked me to just sit and observe. I was given a phone list but nobody really talked to me. I felt a part from instead of a part of.
I left vowing crazily to not return! I got a bit more crazy and it was suggested that I try a different meeting. I did and am grateful for that group, and that suggestion. They had a different format, were very welcoming and shared the ESH with arriving at Al-Anon and more about Step 1.
Happy Monday all - been golfing and doing some 'tidy' work around here. Off to dinner in a while with program gal pals and golfing in the AM again. Enjoy your day!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Betty, I hope you have an awesome time!!! Thank you for the ODAT.
LOL IAH. My first meeting was bad too. It took me a long time to realize another group may not be the same tho. Enjoy your golf game. I can't wait to get my work done and off to play after my mom gets here:)
I was the only man at my first meeting- and the only man in the group- for many years... any barriers evaporated at my first meeting. I needed to be there, and that was that. I think that, over the years Alanon made me a better man; and my sense of identity was deepened and enriched. Well is make us all a better person- and that is what matters most!
Betty, enjoy your vacation and thank you for this reading! I remember my first meeting almost as if it were yesterday. The months before the meeting, I truly did feel that I was drowning. I agree so much with the importance of welcoming the newcomer. I still remember the woman who enthusiastically welcomed me at my first meeting... I call her my "Ala-Mom." I strive to be as welcoming as I can to newcomers.
I am late to this party, but I too, wish you a fun vacay!Thank you for your service Betty!
My first "rooms" were the rooms of NAR-Anon. I went many times. I was drowning and I needed the help! However, all I ever felt was despair each time I left a meeting. At that time I wanted my marriage to work - but in doing Step 4 this time, I realize I just wanted things back to the way they were - but those meetings were mostly about who was relapsing when. Those meetings did open my eyes to addiction however, I must say that. When I saw the elder women there who was dealing with her husband's third relapse (after 15 years of clean living) I knew in my gut I did not want to end up like her!
It wasn't until somebody mentioned I should try Al-Anon that I found something akin to hope. It took me several tries to find just the right meeting there too... but it was well worth it! The people within those rooms were welcoming and understanding. Even after all my Nar-Anon meetings, and the "family" meetings at his facility, the first meeting I went to, I just wept the whole time! Someone kind came up after (before I could run out) and gave me a hug and told me it does get better. I still remember the feeling of her arms around me!
This time around, I did not hesitate to get help. I sought out meetings. The welcoming feeling was still there!
It's going to be another triple-digit day here! Going to work...bye!
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
David, I think it's awesome that you jumped right in. I was a bit in shock at all the women in tears.......I can imagine your comfort level though. I was once sent to a veterans support group to help me with PTSD. I didn't go back. The men were all awesome but it was not the place for me. Back then, there were no answers for PTSD, and sure weren't support groups for women LOL.
Thanks.