Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

cdb · cdb

Hello John, Just want to thank you for all the support you have given me. I feel so lucky to be able to use this message board and the chatroom at MIP. You are so good at talking to me in a private secure way and I do appreciate that. I can tell that you are a person that is out for the good of the communit...

kismetstrand · kismetstrand

When I first came to Alanon, my thoughts were "it's all the A's fault". I get to Alanon and I'm told "you're just as sick, if not sicker, than the A". That didn't sit well with me. Made me mad. But I kept coming back to listen and learn. Pretty soon I realized, yeah, they'r...

jj · jj

My AH came home tonight and asked... Do you ever ask yourself "why me"? Almost before he finished I answered yes all the time. He had this supprised look on his face like what for?? He never said another word when I could tell he wanted to talk about how hard things are for him and he wanted me to feel sory for...

dori · dori

Good morning guys , I am in a dilema and I dont where to turn.I have been in alanon 2 years now.I am single mom of 2 teens , one is 18 works pt time and goes to college and the other in hs.My ex a is not in our life.I lost my job in octand how we have gotten by I would have to write a book of all the ways God ha...

John · John

The 12 Steps 1. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol, - that our lives had become unmanageable. 2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. 3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him. 4...

debilyn · debilyn

I have an iBook, every time now when I click on someones post my internet explorer quits. )c: I hate this, any ideas? I depend on this bb so much! love,debilyn

Lucy2 · Lucy2

I come here daily and read posts but rarely post myself. Today, I am in need of experience, strength, and hope from those of you who may have been through these things in the past. My 26 y/o daughter is one of the addicts/mental illness in my life. I got a call from...

Lanchas · Lanchas

I am totally new to this. I don't understand what the different 12 steps are. I would like to know what they are. I was also wondering if religion was a big part of this. I'm not very religious. I hope someone will help me understand all this. Lanchas

estrelladehope · estrelladehope

For some reason I just cannot seem to communicate with my A (husband). He has to constantly ask me a question several times before I actually answer it. I am not sure if I am just being defensive of his questions or as I told him earlier this morning that I decide that his question is not worth...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

...."May I turn myself inside out, air out the depression which has been closeted inside me, replace it with the comfortable feeling that I am cared about by real friends, then pass along that comfort to others, caught in the same despair." Today I Will Remember: "The onlry real despair is lo...

mastiff · mastiff

"Let Go" "As children bring their broken toys-with tears- for us to mend, I brought my broken dreams to Him because He was my friend. But then, instead of leaving Him in peace to work alone, I hung around and tried to help with ways that were my own. At last I snatched them back and cried, "H...

cdb · cdb

Hello friends, I talked to my dad today and he sounds good. He is surviving the visit with his brother and his wife,,,,the uncle/aunt of mine that screwed over my son and dad by selling the business out from under my son recently. Thanks for the prayers for my dad's health. My son is not a happy camper...

gardengal · gardengal

In all proceedings the World Service Confernece of Alanon shall observe the spirit of the traditions: 1: that only sufficient operating funds, including an ample reserve, be its prudent financial principle. 2: that no conference member shall be place in unqualified authority over other mem...

david62 · david62

Hi everyone! A friend in the chatroom wanted me to post this poem so she could read it. I wrote this poem for my two step sons before I got into the program. I was listening to someone talking about working the steps the other evening in the chat room and remembered the title of the poem.&...

Mark S · Mark S

We are all ready to recognize that our "A" is sick and actively seek their rehabilitation; it doesn't come so easy to see that I may need to change my mindset as well. While I have acknowledged that the "A" in my life has a disease, that doesn’t take rocket science, I am gratified that I was right about “the...

ReneeD · ReneeD

Hello.... My name is Renee and I've been in AA for 10 years, however, I am just starting out in Al-Anon. I work as a Chemical Dependency Counselor and have many family members who are alcoholics and/or addicts. I suppose "my bottom" as far as enabling is concerned, occurr...

Jeannie · Jeannie

Hi, I was reading a post Richard had written and he said "Love does not hurt." It got me thinking, no love shouldn't hurt. Love is pure and good. If we are hurt when someone we loves lets us down, it is not love that is hurting us, but our own expectations. When we hurt becoss of the loss of a loved one, t...

onerugrat · onerugrat

Hi, I need to know how I can support m husband who is trying to quit throug aa. -- Edited by onerugrat at 16:55, 2005-03-10

Lanchas · Lanchas

Hi. I'm new to this. I have alcoholic parents but my mom is the reason I'm here. I'm a little shy right now since I am new to this. I don't know what else to say right now so I'm done with this message. Lanchas

page · page

This place has been a comfort for me. My S/O is now in a wonderful treatment program. It focuses on her. Sure there is a group for us both to attend- "family night". It's great if your A partner doesn't cop out with fear and tears. They are here for her, not me. Angr...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

"Face your deficiencies and acknowledge them; but do not let them master you. Let them teach you patience, sweetness, insight. --Heller Keller

mjg · mjg

Hello I am a recovery alcholic, I have a spouse who is not an alcholic. Is it unreasonable for me to ask that spouse to not drink anymore? Or not to come home if they had been drinking ie.stay at a friends house? I am confused as to what I am supposed to expect from my spou...

Mark S · Mark S

Ran into a Dale Carnegie graduate that was in a class that I was Grad assisting last fall and while we were talking he mentioned something negative about a mutual acquaintance (another grad) and then stopped and said oops guess I’m not doing very well as I already forgot the 3 C’s (for Carnegie its criti...

jj · jj

Today i am greatful for my loving children Today I am greatful for alanon Today I am greatful that my husband came home so I could go to my f2f meeting Today I am greatful that my husband realized that alanon is good for me Today I am greatful that I have many supportive friends that help me when I am feeling b...

cdb · cdb

Thank you all for your recent prayers. I finally talked to my dad about that situation with my son about the business he was buying and so far dad is doing okay. He is hurt as we all are that my uncle did not at least give my son and dad the courtesy of talking to ...

Beskem · Beskem

I am a newbie, I went with my wife to her first AA meeting Sunday night. She has been drinking, self-medicating for six months, she is 36 yrs old and suffering depression for 3-4 years. She drinks about a fifth a day abuses prescription drugs when they are available&n...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

I remember Love feeling like a great, big, comfy Soft Easy Chair...Ah Hah...Where I could be myself! :)

Mamaklop · Mamaklop

I am so sorry for disappearing tonite...My baby needed me right in the middle of the meeting. It may happen more than I like but as most of you know that have kids...well they come first. I will try again tomorrow night. Thank you so much for being understanding.

kerry5 · kerry5

I was in mip in 2000 for two years. I left cause i was going through to much with a divorce at the time and i didnt know how to handle some things. I am a very intense person, i was angry at some people i thought that abandoned me. I was an op in Alanonchat, acoa c...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

Hi...At various alanon meetings, there are flyers given out for Alanon picnics, retreats, spring flings, dances (usually AA combined), rallies, conventions, potlucks. [This year there is a Spring Fling in Galesburg, IL for both Alanon and AA. I can post this in...

debilyn · debilyn

Ok what time is the meeting? I am in Oregon. love, debilyn who for some reason cannot keep her eyes open today...zzzzz

cdb · cdb

Hello everyone, I still haven't got an answer if there will be a vote tonite on whether we can give hugs, smiles, nods or agrees during a meeting. There are people that don't use this board and don't even know about the meeting as someone stated at open chat late last night. I am new here and I have voiced...

holly123 · holly123

Hi Everyone, I needed to just sit here and type. In a way I hate message boards because I can't get an immediate answer. I want it and I want it now. Guess that goes with the whole problems I suffer from huh, lol. Anyway I am so confused.&nbs...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

Gosh, went to an alanon retreat. Some of it is still sinking in. A friend of mine tried to remind me when dealing with my A, "No defense, (defensiveness) No retaliation." I guess I think of it as take no offense, no need to retaliate.

holly123 · holly123

Hello Everyone, Let me tell you about myself, I have been in Al-anon for almost a year, I have made great strides and great slides in this program. I have been married to my a for almost 10 years and new him much more than that. I previously had a online sponsor b...

fineline · fineline

I've worked the steps and discovered that I am emotionally immature and needy. I also discovered that I married a really decent man who is emotionally unavailable. (I'll pass on the hardware store theory have heard it plenty of times). What I need to know, is now what? I especially want to hear from any...

dogscribe · dogscribe

Hi everyone. I haven't posted here very often but I do come and read to gain some insight with everyone's experiences. First off I just want to say thank you to everyone for sharing and for willing to listen to my vents. It's weird - there must be different stages with dealing with an A.&n...

Jeannie · Jeannie

Hi, In another thread some one had asked me how Conner was, and how old he is now. Conner is now 15 months old, he is not walking, but he crawls and climbs faster than I can catch him. He is a little joy, laughing and smiling all of the time. He is so content, okay a little spoiled but Mom and Big Brothers...

richard · richard

At times, I say, “I wish I could get younger as I get older.” I say, I wish I could go back to younger years, only take with me what I know today. Only thing is though… if I took back what I know now… I would not do many, most of what I have done. However, if I did not do those things, done other things… I would not...

cloud · cloud

Hi all I am looking for a sponser who can help me begin working the steps and just lend a hand if I get off track, I really do not know to go about asking for one, so any input you can please give. Yes I am the lost puppy! LOL I need to find myself and I am not sure how since I have been not knowing me for so long, well,...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

I picked up my blue book "How Alanon Works for Family and Friends" and began to read about the slogans. Was pretty interesting how we study this slogan and really study the "Let Live" part very thoroughly, but we forget the "LIVE" part. The "LIVE" part is for US, and we have a right to a good l...

jj · jj

Lastnight all was going just fine and for once in such a long time I was headded to bed early, had a shower and getting ready for bed. When I got out of the shower I heard my daughter crying and since AH was home and not intoxicated I figured he would tend to daughters needs but no she continued to cry. So I quic...

cdb · cdb

Hello Everyone, Part of my journey though alanon is to make amends. WEll, I need to explain about what I found to be a problem for me lately. I have chronic pain and at nite I take a pain pill called methadone which is very strong and also latey a sleeping pill called ambien. I know that my pa...

kismetstrand · kismetstrand

I was just over reading the AA board and came upon a post that made me stop and think. To be honest, what this post mentioned had never crossed my mind. We refer people to books and pamphlets, the written word. Now here in chat or message board I think it is pretty safe to assume the person ca...

Maria123 · Maria123

Hey guys, is the page down tonight, Tuesday, March 8th?

Phil · Phil

Deal with Resentment Now!!! Remember the HALT formula - when you are Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired, you are more likely to act out. When you are hungry, you can eat. When you are lonely you can seek company or make a phone call. When you are tired you can give yourself some rest. But what can you do when...

shimo · shimo

 GENERAL BUSINESS GROUP CONSCIENCE MEETING March 9, 2005 - 7:00 PM EST in the Al-Anon Chatroom   &n...

kismetstrand · kismetstrand

I don't know if this is a recent upsurge of certain things happening, or if I just didn't notice it before. At any rate, since we have a lot of newcomers and others who are not able to attend face to face meetings, I just thought I would mention a few things. My humble opinion here. Take...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

Tell me what you pay attention to and I will tell you who you are. --Jose Ortegay Gasset Where the mind is, there will be the heart; we become what we think about. If that idea doesn't halt you in your tracks, it should. Why? Our sense of self is totally reflective of our habitual thi...

richard · richard

This detachment thing… hating the disease… loving the person inside… all beings of God deserves to be loved and are loved by God… God is in all and is all. A chronic drunk driver deserves to be loved… she or he deserves to be in prison for the protection of society and the drunk. A mate addicted to drugs lik...

jrtjosey · jrtjosey

I have a phone sponsor, but I would really like to be able to IM via yahoo or MSN someone. I have chronic health problems and need to work the steps for that as much as my families alcohol problem. anybody willing, I have p[lenty of friends to chat with so I wouldn't be bugging you all the time, I j...

whitie · whitie

In 2002 when I went to my first Ala-non meeting I hadn't worked in 5 years. I stayed home and managed everything, managed to enable my AH with all the freedom in the world. After 6 months in program I got a job that I love and found mmyself again. I take classes, work out and feel great. Yea, he quit drinking t...

cdb · cdb

Hello friends, My 20 year old alcoholic/drug addict daughter is still in the inpatient treatment center and probably will be some time still. It has been a month Wednesday that she was admited. We now owe $1,000 out of pocket which is good for most insurance companies but not good for my husband and m...

jj · jj

Step Three Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God, as we understood Him. There is a saying in the AlaTeen Twelve Step Program that says, “God Can’t do his work if you’re standing in His way.” Several years ago a popular song said, “If it don’t fit---don’t force it-...

debilyn · debilyn

Just wanted to thank you for always responding to messages. I feel you as being a real part of this alanon room here. You have hung in there thru hard stuff. I am so glad. Please update us how your daughter is, and how are you doing?? love,debilyn

Ava · Ava

Just a wee poem I wrote the other day dont know how good my poem writing skills are so laugh if you want to - Background to understand poem is that the city I live in has an east coast - white sandy beaches and an hour away a west coast (The Manukau) with black sand beaches pronounc...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

"A mob has many heads, but no brain. " Shankara Recent research has led brain specialists to understand that the human mind works less like a computer than a town meeting. kpparently there are many inputs offering different responses to the issues that confront us.&nb...

richard · richard

…my cats, I think about four years of age, so dislike being held huggy like, but much so crave it. And, I do hug them strongly, with locked hold but not squeezing and not locking to ‘keep’ them but a letting go hug… go as they will and ever so slowly do… funny thing about love, well maybe it ain’t so strange, j...

debilyn · debilyn

I don't feel much still. Just serene and I go on, move forward. A fixed what was needed on my rental. I saw no heart, not even a black one at first. He was ok but in two days I saw how the disease has progressed. I have a pot bellied pig named Luster who loves me. He is a guard pig when it comes to me. He hat...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

"I am not bound to win, but I am bound to be true. I am not bound to succeed, but I am bound by the light that I have. I must stand by anybody that stands right, stand with him while he is right, and part with him when he goes wrong." --Abraham Lincoln

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Thank you JOHN/OP (Preview) Hello John, Just want to thank you for all the support you have given me. I feel so lucky to be able to use this message board and the chatroom at MIP. You are so good at talking to me in a private secure way and I do appreciate that. I can tell that you are a person that is out for the good of the communit...	cdb	0	1226	Mar 13, 2005 by cdb
	Playing the Martyr/Blame Game (Preview) When I first came to Alanon, my thoughts were "it's all the A's fault". I get to Alanon and I'm told "you're just as sick, if not sicker, than the A". That didn't sit well with me. Made me mad. But I kept coming back to listen and learn. Pretty soon I realized, yeah, they'r...	kismetstrand	5	4140	Mar 13, 2005 by cdb
	Why Me? (Preview) My AH came home tonight and asked... Do you ever ask yourself "why me"? Almost before he finished I answered yes all the time. He had this supprised look on his face like what for?? He never said another word when I could tell he wanted to talk about how hard things are for him and he wanted me to feel sory for...	jj	5	1639	Mar 13, 2005 by megan
	when do you give and who do you give up to (Preview) Good morning guys , I am in a dilema and I dont where to turn.I have been in alanon 2 years now.I am single mom of 2 teens , one is 18 works pt time and goes to college and the other in hs.My ex a is not in our life.I lost my job in octand how we have gotten by I would have to write a book of all the ways God ha...	dori	6	1540	Mar 12, 2005 by sanddie
	The 12 Steps (Preview) The 12 Steps 1. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol, - that our lives had become unmanageable. 2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. 3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him. 4...	John	3	1274	Mar 12, 2005 by lalarainbow
	need help with mess. board (Preview) I have an iBook, every time now when I click on someones post my internet explorer quits. )c: I hate this, any ideas? I depend on this bb so much! love,debilyn	debilyn	2	1182	Mar 12, 2005 by Joat
	A mother's pain (Preview) I come here daily and read posts but rarely post myself. Today, I am in need of experience, strength, and hope from those of you who may have been through these things in the past. My 26 y/o daughter is one of the addicts/mental illness in my life. I got a call from...	Lucy2	5	1712	Mar 12, 2005 by Lucy2
	More about being new to this (Preview) I am totally new to this. I don't understand what the different 12 steps are. I would like to know what they are. I was also wondering if religion was a big part of this. I'm not very religious. I hope someone will help me understand all this. Lanchas	Lanchas	3	1470	Mar 12, 2005 by jo4
	Communication (Preview) For some reason I just cannot seem to communicate with my A (husband). He has to constantly ask me a question several times before I actually answer it. I am not sure if I am just being defensive of his questions or as I told him earlier this morning that I decide that his question is not worth...	estrelladehope	3	1581	Mar 12, 2005 by wallsal55
	Today I Pray... (Preview) ...."May I turn myself inside out, air out the depression which has been closeted inside me, replace it with the comfortable feeling that I am cared about by real friends, then pass along that comfort to others, caught in the same despair." Today I Will Remember: "The onlry real despair is lo...	wallsal55	1	1230	Mar 12, 2005 by Smeep61
	"Let Go" a poem to share with ya (Preview) "Let Go" "As children bring their broken toys-with tears- for us to mend, I brought my broken dreams to Him because He was my friend. But then, instead of leaving Him in peace to work alone, I hung around and tried to help with ways that were my own. At last I snatched them back and cried, "H...	mastiff	6	4469	Mar 12, 2005 by Smeep61
	Update on dad/son/etc. (Preview) Hello friends, I talked to my dad today and he sounds good. He is surviving the visit with his brother and his wife,,,,the uncle/aunt of mine that screwed over my son and dad by selling the business out from under my son recently. Thanks for the prayers for my dad's health. My son is not a happy camper...	cdb	3	1365	Mar 12, 2005 by Smeep61
	GENERAL WARRANTIES, FOR THOSE INTERESTED (Preview) In all proceedings the World Service Confernece of Alanon shall observe the spirit of the traditions: 1: that only sufficient operating funds, including an ample reserve, be its prudent financial principle. 2: that no conference member shall be place in unqualified authority over other mem...	gardengal	2	2135	Mar 12, 2005 by Smeep61
	Poem - Steps (Preview) Hi everyone! A friend in the chatroom wanted me to post this poem so she could read it. I wrote this poem for my two step sons before I got into the program. I was listening to someone talking about working the steps the other evening in the chat room and remembered the title of the poem.&...	david62	5	1546	Mar 12, 2005 by bob6502
	Choosing life this go (Preview) We are all ready to recognize that our "A" is sick and actively seek their rehabilitation; it doesn't come so easy to see that I may need to change my mindset as well. While I have acknowledged that the "A" in my life has a disease, that doesn’t take rocket science, I am gratified that I was right about “the...	Mark S	5	1407	Mar 12, 2005 by jj
	VERY new to Al-Anon.... (Preview) Hello.... My name is Renee and I've been in AA for 10 years, however, I am just starting out in Al-Anon. I work as a Chemical Dependency Counselor and have many family members who are alcoholics and/or addicts. I suppose "my bottom" as far as enabling is concerned, occurr...	ReneeD	5	1302	Mar 11, 2005 by jj
	Rambling (Preview) Hi, I was reading a post Richard had written and he said "Love does not hurt." It got me thinking, no love shouldn't hurt. Love is pure and good. If we are hurt when someone we loves lets us down, it is not love that is hurting us, but our own expectations. When we hurt becoss of the loss of a loved one, t...	Jeannie	3	1571	Mar 11, 2005 by cdb
	husband drinks and wants to quit (Preview) Hi, I need to know how I can support m husband who is trying to quit throug aa. -- Edited by onerugrat at 16:55, 2005-03-10	onerugrat	4	1262	Mar 11, 2005 by cdb
	New To This (Preview) Hi. I'm new to this. I have alcoholic parents but my mom is the reason I'm here. I'm a little shy right now since I am new to this. I don't know what else to say right now so I'm done with this message. Lanchas	Lanchas	2	1269	Mar 11, 2005 by jj
	In the middle of AA HELL (Preview) This place has been a comfort for me. My S/O is now in a wonderful treatment program. It focuses on her. Sure there is a group for us both to attend- "family night". It's great if your A partner doesn't cop out with fear and tears. They are here for her, not me. Angr...	page	4	1964	Mar 11, 2005 by KathyS
	Quote for Today - (4th step!) (Preview) "Face your deficiencies and acknowledge them; but do not let them master you. Let them teach you patience, sweetness, insight. --Heller Keller	wallsal55	2	1389	Mar 11, 2005 by ReneeD
	Advice Needed (Preview) Hello I am a recovery alcholic, I have a spouse who is not an alcholic. Is it unreasonable for me to ask that spouse to not drink anymore? Or not to come home if they had been drinking ie.stay at a friends house? I am confused as to what I am supposed to expect from my spou...	mjg	6	1683	Mar 10, 2005 by jo4
	Little Progress not Perfection thing I noted today (Preview) Ran into a Dale Carnegie graduate that was in a class that I was Grad assisting last fall and while we were talking he mentioned something negative about a mutual acquaintance (another grad) and then stopped and said oops guess I’m not doing very well as I already forgot the 3 C’s (for Carnegie its criti...	Mark S	2	1507	Mar 10, 2005 by cdb
	gratitude (Preview) Today i am greatful for my loving children Today I am greatful for alanon Today I am greatful that my husband came home so I could go to my f2f meeting Today I am greatful that my husband realized that alanon is good for me Today I am greatful that I have many supportive friends that help me when I am feeling b...	jj	5	1682	Mar 10, 2005 by babs
	Thanks for the prayers for my family..... (Preview) Thank you all for your recent prayers. I finally talked to my dad about that situation with my son about the business he was buying and so far dad is doing okay. He is hurt as we all are that my uncle did not at least give my son and dad the courtesy of talking to ...	cdb	6	1668	Mar 10, 2005 by lebe27
	Newbie (Preview) I am a newbie, I went with my wife to her first AA meeting Sunday night. She has been drinking, self-medicating for six months, she is 36 yrs old and suffering depression for 3-4 years. She drinks about a fifth a day abuses prescription drugs when they are available&n...	Beskem	6	1465	Mar 10, 2005 by Mark S
	Love (Preview) I remember Love feeling like a great, big, comfy Soft Easy Chair...Ah Hah...Where I could be myself! :)	wallsal55	2	1221	Mar 10, 2005 by Jeannie
	Apology (Preview) I am so sorry for disappearing tonite...My baby needed me right in the middle of the meeting. It may happen more than I like but as most of you know that have kids...well they come first. I will try again tomorrow night. Thank you so much for being understanding.	Mamaklop	2	1277	Mar 10, 2005 by Jeannie
	My Mip Experience (Preview) I was in mip in 2000 for two years. I left cause i was going through to much with a divorce at the time and i didnt know how to handle some things. I am a very intense person, i was angry at some people i thought that abandoned me. I was an op in Alanonchat, acoa c...	kerry5	7	1505	Mar 9, 2005 by cabecka
	Alanon Retreats/Spring Flings (Preview) Hi...At various alanon meetings, there are flyers given out for Alanon picnics, retreats, spring flings, dances (usually AA combined), rallies, conventions, potlucks. [This year there is a Spring Fling in Galesburg, IL for both Alanon and AA. I can post this in...	wallsal55	0	1423	Mar 9, 2005 by wallsal55
	Meeting? time? (Preview) Ok what time is the meeting? I am in Oregon. love, debilyn who for some reason cannot keep her eyes open today...zzzzz	debilyn	2	1232	Mar 9, 2005 by Maria123
	VOTING tonite at meeting (Preview) Hello everyone, I still haven't got an answer if there will be a vote tonite on whether we can give hugs, smiles, nods or agrees during a meeting. There are people that don't use this board and don't even know about the meeting as someone stated at open chat late last night. I am new here and I have voiced...	cdb	3	1398	Mar 9, 2005 by kismetstrand
	Need to get it off my chest (Preview) Hi Everyone, I needed to just sit here and type. In a way I hate message boards because I can't get an immediate answer. I want it and I want it now. Guess that goes with the whole problems I suffer from huh, lol. Anyway I am so confused.&nbs...	holly123	4	1536	Mar 9, 2005 by megan
	Defensiveness/Retaliation (Preview) Gosh, went to an alanon retreat. Some of it is still sinking in. A friend of mine tried to remind me when dealing with my A, "No defense, (defensiveness) No retaliation." I guess I think of it as take no offense, no need to retaliate.	wallsal55	4	1776	Mar 9, 2005 by nmike
	Looking for a sponsor (Preview) Hello Everyone, Let me tell you about myself, I have been in Al-anon for almost a year, I have made great strides and great slides in this program. I have been married to my a for almost 10 years and new him much more than that. I previously had a online sponsor b...	holly123	1	1360	Mar 9, 2005 by debilyn
	Emotionally Unavailable (Preview) I've worked the steps and discovered that I am emotionally immature and needy. I also discovered that I married a really decent man who is emotionally unavailable. (I'll pass on the hardware store theory have heard it plenty of times). What I need to know, is now what? I especially want to hear from any...	fineline	9	1379	Mar 9, 2005 by holly123
	Just a shell (Preview) Hi everyone. I haven't posted here very often but I do come and read to gain some insight with everyone's experiences. First off I just want to say thank you to everyone for sharing and for willing to listen to my vents. It's weird - there must be different stages with dealing with an A.&n...	dogscribe	8	1309	Mar 9, 2005 by richard
	My children (Preview) Hi, In another thread some one had asked me how Conner was, and how old he is now. Conner is now 15 months old, he is not walking, but he crawls and climbs faster than I can catch him. He is a little joy, laughing and smiling all of the time. He is so content, okay a little spoiled but Mom and Big Brothers...	Jeannie	6	1739	Mar 9, 2005 by richard
	A thought... thanks cdb... all... (Preview) At times, I say, “I wish I could get younger as I get older.” I say, I wish I could go back to younger years, only take with me what I know today. Only thing is though… if I took back what I know now… I would not do many, most of what I have done. However, if I did not do those things, done other things… I would not...	richard	1	1351	Mar 9, 2005 by cdb
	looking for a sponser (Preview) Hi all I am looking for a sponser who can help me begin working the steps and just lend a hand if I get off track, I really do not know to go about asking for one, so any input you can please give. Yes I am the lost puppy! LOL I need to find myself and I am not sure how since I have been not knowing me for so long, well,...	cloud	4	1680	Mar 9, 2005 by haximon
	"Live" and Let Live (Preview) I picked up my blue book "How Alanon Works for Family and Friends" and began to read about the slogans. Was pretty interesting how we study this slogan and really study the "Let Live" part very thoroughly, but we forget the "LIVE" part. The "LIVE" part is for US, and we have a right to a good l...	wallsal55	2	1417	Mar 9, 2005 by haximon
	almost slipped into old habbits (Preview) Lastnight all was going just fine and for once in such a long time I was headded to bed early, had a shower and getting ready for bed. When I got out of the shower I heard my daughter crying and since AH was home and not intoxicated I figured he would tend to daughters needs but no she continued to cry. So I quic...	jj	7	1428	Mar 9, 2005 by richard
	Am Making Amends so you all... (Preview) Hello Everyone, Part of my journey though alanon is to make amends. WEll, I need to explain about what I found to be a problem for me lately. I have chronic pain and at nite I take a pain pill called methadone which is very strong and also latey a sleeping pill called ambien. I know that my pa...	cdb	9	1691	Mar 9, 2005 by cdb
	Illiteracy and Recovery (Preview) I was just over reading the AA board and came upon a post that made me stop and think. To be honest, what this post mentioned had never crossed my mind. We refer people to books and pamphlets, the written word. Now here in chat or message board I think it is pretty safe to assume the person ca...	kismetstrand	4	1579	Mar 9, 2005 by richard
	Is our Webpage down? Anyone?? (Preview) Hey guys, is the page down tonight, Tuesday, March 8th?	Maria123	1	1266	Mar 8, 2005 by babs
	A share RE Resentment from the AA board (Preview) Deal with Resentment Now!!! Remember the HALT formula - when you are Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired, you are more likely to act out. When you are hungry, you can eat. When you are lonely you can seek company or make a phone call. When you are tired you can give yourself some rest. But what can you do when...	Phil	2	1509	Mar 8, 2005 by babs
	BUS MTG AGENDA (Preview)  GENERAL BUSINESS GROUP CONSCIENCE MEETING March 9, 2005 - 7:00 PM EST in the Al-Anon Chatroom   &n...	shimo	4	1489	Mar 8, 2005 by shimo
	Meeting Etiquette (Preview) I don't know if this is a recent upsurge of certain things happening, or if I just didn't notice it before. At any rate, since we have a lot of newcomers and others who are not able to attend face to face meetings, I just thought I would mention a few things. My humble opinion here. Take...	kismetstrand	20	8141	Mar 8, 2005 by Susanroo
	Thinking (more) (Preview) Tell me what you pay attention to and I will tell you who you are. --Jose Ortegay Gasset Where the mind is, there will be the heart; we become what we think about. If that idea doesn't halt you in your tracks, it should. Why? Our sense of self is totally reflective of our habitual thi...	wallsal55	5	1291	Mar 8, 2005 by dogscribe
	Did a lot of work on a reply... repeat here... (Preview) This detachment thing… hating the disease… loving the person inside… all beings of God deserves to be loved and are loved by God… God is in all and is all. A chronic drunk driver deserves to be loved… she or he deserves to be in prison for the protection of society and the drunk. A mate addicted to drugs lik...	richard	5	1447	Mar 8, 2005 by shimo
	jumping in with both feet (Preview) I have a phone sponsor, but I would really like to be able to IM via yahoo or MSN someone. I have chronic health problems and need to work the steps for that as much as my families alcohol problem. anybody willing, I have p[lenty of friends to chat with so I wouldn't be bugging you all the time, I j...	jrtjosey	4	1399	Mar 8, 2005 by cdb
	A work in progress (Preview) In 2002 when I went to my first Ala-non meeting I hadn't worked in 5 years. I stayed home and managed everything, managed to enable my AH with all the freedom in the world. After 6 months in program I got a job that I love and found mmyself again. I take classes, work out and feel great. Yea, he quit drinking t...	whitie	6	1264	Mar 8, 2005 by whitie
	Had to buy a lock today :( (Preview) Hello friends, My 20 year old alcoholic/drug addict daughter is still in the inpatient treatment center and probably will be some time still. It has been a month Wednesday that she was admited. We now owe $1,000 out of pocket which is good for most insurance companies but not good for my husband and m...	cdb	3	1329	Mar 7, 2005 by cdb
	step 3&4 explained (Preview) Step Three Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God, as we understood Him. There is a saying in the AlaTeen Twelve Step Program that says, “God Can’t do his work if you’re standing in His way.” Several years ago a popular song said, “If it don’t fit---don’t force it-...	jj	3	1779	Mar 7, 2005 by jj
	cdb (Preview) Just wanted to thank you for always responding to messages. I feel you as being a real part of this alanon room here. You have hung in there thru hard stuff. I am so glad. Please update us how your daughter is, and how are you doing?? love,debilyn	debilyn	4	1568	Mar 7, 2005 by cdb
	Anyone wanna read my poem (Preview) Just a wee poem I wrote the other day dont know how good my poem writing skills are so laugh if you want to - Background to understand poem is that the city I live in has an east coast - white sandy beaches and an hour away a west coast (The Manukau) with black sand beaches pronounc...	Ava	6	1887	Mar 7, 2005 by babs
	Thinking (Preview) "A mob has many heads, but no brain. " Shankara Recent research has led brain specialists to understand that the human mind works less like a computer than a town meeting. kpparently there are many inputs offering different responses to the issues that confront us.&nb...	wallsal55	3	1641	Mar 7, 2005 by babs
	Funny, odd funny... / my cats... (Preview) …my cats, I think about four years of age, so dislike being held huggy like, but much so crave it. And, I do hug them strongly, with locked hold but not squeezing and not locking to ‘keep’ them but a letting go hug… go as they will and ever so slowly do… funny thing about love, well maybe it ain’t so strange, j...	richard	5	1443	Mar 7, 2005 by mstrixe
	update to disease progression (Preview) I don't feel much still. Just serene and I go on, move forward. A fixed what was needed on my rental. I saw no heart, not even a black one at first. He was ok but in two days I saw how the disease has progressed. I have a pot bellied pig named Luster who loves me. He is a guard pig when it comes to me. He hat...	debilyn	17	3622	Mar 7, 2005 by estrelladehope
	Quote for Today (Preview) "I am not bound to win, but I am bound to be true. I am not bound to succeed, but I am bound by the light that I have. I must stand by anybody that stands right, stand with him while he is right, and part with him when he goes wrong." --Abraham Lincoln	wallsal55	0	1145	Mar 7, 2005 by wallsal55
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.