|
|
The Email
(Preview)
This is the email that I sent my ex right after he broke up with me. I never got a response. I haven't heard from him, and am realizing I may not. I'm trying to put my focus elsewhere, but it's SO SO difficult. I have so much love for him. Here it is: Where do I even begin? I am hurt beyond measure. I am confused,...
|
Restless Soul
|
11
|
741
|
|
|
|
New Job ..
(Preview)
All I can say is WOW .. I don't even know where to start ... no job is perfect that's the truth .. I want to say I have never ever worked in a company like this one .. the opportunity to grow and learn is out there all I have to do is take it. It is like having the brass ring on a merry go round and now my destiny is min...
|
SerenityRUS
|
10
|
402
|
|
|
|
like riding a bike?
(Preview)
Hello out there, it's been a long time since I've been here. Last year I was changed to the graveyard shift at work. To make the prologue a bit shorter, it had a very bad effect with my health issues. Just a few months ago I finally was able to return to daytime hours and am trying to get my health to a better pl...
|
Raven Juniper
|
6
|
644
|
|
|
|
Now I have two to worry about
(Preview)
DS was in a shelter and then in a room at a gym. He had a job interview set up in NYC for Monday. So Sunday he called my 73 year sister, in NYC, who has never lived with anyone as a grownup and asked if he could come and sleep on her couch. She is very fragile, nervous, and gets distressed easily. I can't tell if he...
|
laurab
|
4
|
690
|
|
|
|
The Forum
(Preview)
I was wondering while having breakfast and reading the Al-Anon monthly FORUM magazine how many of the MIP Fellowship also have this tool within arms reach. Like MIP the shares come from all over the world and for me are often right on regarding recovery. Does your meetings have copies and do your g...
|
Jerry F
|
2
|
475
|
|
|
|
Detachment
(Preview)
I really need some specific material regarding detachment. I am eager to start working it, but I don't have anything to teach me. Any suggestions? (None of my meetings have had anything available)
|
mosaicmax
|
6
|
2928
|
|
|
|
Just For Today ~ Agreeable ~ 10/04/15
(Preview)
JUST FOR TODAY I will be agreeable. I will look as well as I can, dress becomingly, keep my voice low, be courteous,criticize not one bit. I wont find fault with anything, nor try to improve or regulate anybody but myself.{{Wishing you a bright and cheerful Sunday}}
|
Debb
|
3
|
429
|
|
|
|
C2C (Courage to Change) for 10/4/15
(Preview)
Our lovely Betty is sailing the high seas for the week, so I will try and do some justice to the daily C2C readings. Today's reading begins with discussing our need to look for the similarities in this program vs. the differences. It suggests that we remember why we are all here and while we are all diffe...
|
Iamhere
|
1
|
324
|
|
|
|
Feeling angry
(Preview)
Today, my AH who is not supposed to have unsupervised contact with kids, came home! And drunk! .I was upstairs, suddenly I hear his voice downstairs talking to the kids...my heart skipped a beat. I came downstairs, there he is, on the couch talking to the kids.Both kids looked scared, teary .Omg! What...
|
mvg
|
4
|
432
|
|
|
|
Just For Today ~ 10/03/15
(Preview)
JUST FOR TODAY I will exercise my soul in three ways: I will do somebody a good turn, and not get found out; if anybody knows of it, it will not count. I will do at least two things I dont want to do just for exercise. I will not show anyone that my feelings are hurt; they may be hurt, but today I will not show i...
|
Debb
|
4
|
563
|
|
|
|
C2C 10-3
(Preview)
Hi everyone As I reported a short time ago my favorite alanon Step and tradition meetinhas been experiencing problems with our Meeting room availability at the VA. I did resolve the alanon meeting room issue to the satisfaction of all concerned, so I can really relax when I go on vacation..C2C re...
|
hotrod
|
4
|
571
|
|
|
|
sorry but one more thing.. a question really.
(Preview)
I don't know what it is, but for some reason, I don't feel like I've been very clear on here. This just hit me and I have to ask... what do you do when: Your AH doesn't do anything wrong but want to be left alone to watch TV and drink? Here's the nightly scenario- he comes home from work on weekdays and just want...
|
beacheemom
|
11
|
566
|
|
|
|
My Two Stories ..
(Preview)
So a couple of days ago I mentioned some stories about how my brain works or doesn't work and how easy it is for me to be very impulsive. My first story is about my first X who had issues with drugs. After my X and I had our altercation, and afterwards he tried to scare me into coming back .. I was staying with...
|
SerenityRUS
|
3
|
470
|
|
|
|
Trying to detach
(Preview)
Today marks two long weeks since my AH broke it off with me abruptly. As mentioned in my first post he was 7 months sober when we met, and quickly fell "in love"; And 1 1/2 year of sobriety, and 11 months into our relationship is when he cut me off. I've since left 2 voicemails (I'm certain he bloc...
|
Restless Soul
|
5
|
627
|
|
|
|
I guess I'm not angry anymore.
(Preview)
there is back story here... Long story short my step mother died of chirrosis on September 3rd. I had been dealing and continued to deal with a lot of anger before, during and after her death. I'm not mad anymore. the farther i get away from it, the sadder it becomes. My older sister and I coordinated h...
|
scootypuffjunior
|
5
|
576
|
|
|
|
Partner in rehab and struggling again.
(Preview)
Since I first posted on here, I've joined face to face Al-anon groups and have identified a sponsor as I've decided to throw myself fully into this programme as i realize even more now how I need help for me and how out of control my own life has become and I have allowed things to get. I thought I was doing...
|
Carmel 15
|
2
|
726
|
|
|
|
Just For Today ~ 10/01/15
(Preview)
JUST FOR TODAY I will adjust myself to what is, and not try to adjust everything to my own desires. I will take my luck as it comes, and fit myself to it.Have a great day {{everyone}}.
|
Debb
|
4
|
296
|
|
|
|
Feeling the need to tell him what he did - advice welcome
(Preview)
My first post, and I'm pretty new to the program, though dabbling in it for years. Through my my readings and therapy sessions, I've become a lot better at not enabling, setting boundaries and avoiding trying to solve my husband's problems. I still pick fights when I've hit my limit, but have learned...
|
Mermaid4
|
16
|
1131
|
|
|
|
C2C 9-30
(Preview)
The C2C reading for September 30 speaks about the slogan:"Just for today." It points out that Just for Today, we can take a different point of view and try changing some pattern of behavior that causes problems, just to see what happens. For example, if we are in the habit of responding...
|
hotrod
|
4
|
554
|
|
|
|
Just For Today ~ 10/02/15
(Preview)
JUST FOR TODAY I will try to strengthen my mind. I will study. I will lean something useful. I will not be a mental loafer. I will read something that requires effort, thought and concentration.TGIF {{HUGS}}
|
Debb
|
2
|
290
|
|
|
|
C2C 10-2
(Preview)
The C2C reading for October 2 speaks about giving service in Al-Anon. It points out that the reason that service is so important is that it usually brings us in frequent contact with newcomers and we are then able to share the vital gifts that we have received, and reflect on our growth at the same...
|
hotrod
|
0
|
294
|
|
|
|
miracles & misery
(Preview)
here are some miracles and some misery i had today AH's brother called me and actually was borderland polite to me regarding my AH who after 14 days in still in the fair's motel. ah is now in the horrible stage of his binges, weak,dizzy,cant walk or stand,electrolytes veirtually gone and hasnt had his...
|
YARNCRAZY
|
5
|
532
|
|
|
|
Step 6 posted
(Preview)
http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t60956386/alanon-step-6-10-2015/Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of
|
hotrod
|
0
|
282
|
|
|
|
C2C 10-1
(Preview)
The C2C reading for October 1 is an interesting one. It speaks about thoughts racing through our heads. The reading portrays these thoughts as crashing around at alarming speeds bringing up painful memories, broken promises, fears about the future, lost expectations. In other words, chaos. Pri...
|
hotrod
|
2
|
392
|
|
|
|
went crazy tuesday, back on track now
(Preview)
I have not been on this board for a very long time but I attend about two f2f meetings a week. I have been in Al-Anon since 2011. I am going through some really hard stuff right now and I'm so grateful to have Al-anon to turn to. I went to three meetings this week, which helped, but they sort of felt helpless an...
|
Michelle814
|
11
|
669
|
|
|
|
Just For Today ~ 9/30/15
(Preview)
JUST FOR TODAY I will be happy. This assumes to be true what Abraham Lincoln said, that Most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be.Our minds focus on the past and future when we are fearfuland anxious. Focus on your good qualities and the the giftsthat you have right now.{{HUGS}}
|
Debb
|
6
|
591
|
|
|
|
my mom is visiting for now
(Preview)
Just that. It is still a challenge for me& it will always be. For some reason she treats me differently than other people. I wonder why? Actually I know. I am always going to be her daughter & I always see the real her. You all pretty much know that she has been ill but now she seems alright.
Not muc...
|
Hoot Nanny
|
0
|
301
|
|
|
|
Could we both be DV perpetrators?
(Preview)
I am so so confused. I know my behaviour is very controlling and less than desirable in dealing with and responding (reacting really) to alcoholism. I absolutely own that. But now I am very, very confused as my partner who hurt me physically the other day is saying that its because he is at his wits end an...
|
brightyellow
|
20
|
797
|
|
|
|
what is my actual worth?
(Preview)
So AH got mad at me because I had Wednesday off and never told him. I work the weekend and have to take a day off during the week, guess I just didn't think about it. So yesterday he was pissed as soon as I told him and that went on all day while I was at work. Nasty texts, I tried not to get into it but I had to def...
|
confused2015
|
14
|
784
|
|
|
|
what can I do? My 23 year old keeps getting kicked out of sober houses for drinking. We have break downs when she
(Preview)
stays with us for more than a few days. We have been through rehabs, and then they recommend sober houses as step downs, but it is a viscous cycle. Now we have exhausted insurance payments for rehab, partial hospitalization or IOPs.
|
Cind
|
3
|
490
|
|
|
|
What next?
(Preview)
And the fun ha begun. AH brought me to my daughter in laws mothers house as we are supposed to leave this morning and head out to Indiana. And of course the phone rings last night and already something is wrong...the dogs this and the dogs that,, says what if we don't get a signal at that distance.... Now o...
|
Broken513
|
3
|
446
|
|
|
|
Need to vent before I react
(Preview)
My BF came home from work on Saturday and he was sober. I was grateful for that. Sunday, we went to a new church and I did not agree with the teaching. They preached about preaching the word of god and and the people in the church were nice but I felt smothered. People after people gathered around me and I had...
|
joker
|
3
|
630
|
|
|
|
The root of my fears
(Preview)
I have been doing serious journaling recently and what came to light through some prayer and hitting my knees, is that my base fear is the fear of being made fun of. My dad was a master at belittling me, making me feel like I'll never measure up, heckling me, criticizing me regularly, etc. I was always s...
|
andromeda
|
12
|
706
|
|
|
|
Hope for today sept 29
(Preview)
Good morning everyone-- Today's reading is about including our HP in all our affairs. If I could describe myself one way before program and one way since I have been working a program it would be: before program-- willful. Since program-- willing. That's not to say I don't have plenty of days when I...
|
yanksfan51
|
4
|
527
|
|
|
|
Just For Today ~ 9/29/15
(Preview)
JUST FOR TODAY I will try to live through this day only, and not tackle all my problems at once. I can do something for twelve hours that would appall me if I felt that I had to keep it up for a lifetime.Short and sweet .... "Just For Today" Al-anon Quotes.{{HUGS To Everyone}}
|
Debb
|
3
|
503
|
|
|
|
Learning to take care of me!
(Preview)
I have become more aware of myself lately, which is good,my daughter and I are animal lovers and we have several already,we recently came upon a stray kitten and tried to save him.He was tiny,had been abandoned and almost hit by a car.I don't even think he should have been taken from his mama yet.I looke...
|
mjferg
|
1
|
508
|
|
|
|
Socializing with old friends
(Preview)
I need some advice here. My AH has been sober for going on four months. We have been invited out to dinner with some friends of ours that we use to socialize with before he got sober. They do not know what is going on and I feel like that should be my AH who provides those details. I am a bit worried as this c...
|
Jazzie18
|
6
|
710
|
|
|
|
Wish Me Success & Prayers Please....
(Preview)
So - my active son reached out to me this morning. He is coming over to visit. He texted only so I don't know his current state. Last I knew, he was involved in the marijuana maintenance program sprinkled with some bar hopping. We've not seen each other or talked in almost 6 weeks. I've been praying al...
|
Iamhere
|
18
|
778
|
|
|
|
A Thought for Today ~ Let The Mud Settle ~ 9/27/15
(Preview)
Meditation sitting quietly and letting the mud settle ~ Al-anonAs Lao Tzu put it, Do you have the patience to wait until your mud settles and the water is clear? Can you remain unmoving until the right action arises by itself?Try setting aside 15 minutes per day, and dedicate it to simply sit in solitu...
|
Debb
|
2
|
448
|
|
|
|
I stayed strong today!!!!
(Preview)
My son called today. He sounded good and I know that he was sober. He is staying with a trusted family friend and she confirmed that! He is broke and his good "buddies" stole all his belonging while he was in jail for two months. I have "caved" in the past and sent him money, but today...
|
carolm
|
19
|
858
|
|
|
|
Facing fears at 2nd f2f meeting
(Preview)
This is all good stuff..LOL OK So my latest thing I am working on is to face some of my many many numerous fears. I will start with Thursday and work my way to my 2nd meeting this morning. Thursday: I had lunch with my daughter in laws mother who was in town. I live in FL she now lives in Indiana where my son,...
|
Broken513
|
6
|
613
|
|
|
|
In my dreams
(Preview)
Hi all~This is so funny I had to share it (funny but actually good!). I had a dream last night that my A caused me so much anger, really rage. And in the dream as I was fuming I said to myself, Where are my alanon tools? I better call someone. Isn't that hysterical and great! Lyne
|
Lyne
|
4
|
358
|
|
|
|
C2C 9-27
(Preview)
The C2C reading for September 27 speaks about wanting Instant wisdom, so that we can know everything that will happen in our lives, and plan for it. I know that prior to Al-Anon, I truly believed that this was possible. I planned my life accordingly , and did not see how irrational and unreasonab...
|
hotrod
|
2
|
482
|
|
|
|
Family member supervising Antabuse compliance
(Preview)
I'm looking for input about whether asking my qualifier to take Antabuse, and be supervised when he does to insure compliance is a good or not so good idea. I am the caregiver for my mother with late stage cancer and for my dad, the alcoholic. I'm concerned that his return to drinking will jeopardize h...
|
ihs4hpe
|
12
|
1007
|
|
|
|
A Thought for Today ~ Energy Flows ~ 9/28/15
(Preview)
Where ever I place my attention, energy flows. ~ Al-anon Whatever you spend most of your conscious and unconscious time thinking off, will grow in your reality. This works on the positive as well as on the negative side. If you focus the majority of your attention on why things are not working out the w...
|
Debb
|
3
|
470
|
|
|
|
Grateful
(Preview)
This week was one of the worst weeks I have had in about a year. I have done A LOT of venting, obsessing, complaining, ruminating, and attempting to change outcomes that are out of my control. With that being said, I have A LOT to be grateful for: * YOU GUYS in Al-Anon have guided me through this dark week an...
|
Restless Soul
|
4
|
416
|
|
|
|
Hello everyone , I am new here and need help and guidance to find meetings to attend as an enabler.
(Preview)
I would like to find out where I can attend meeting to help me stop being an enabler to my 22 years old niece. i am very close to her but I noticed her eccessive pot smoking and drinking are taking over her life. i am embarrassed to say that I was providing money for her to go out. she goes to college( failed 1 ye...
|
Joeb
|
5
|
490
|
|
|
|
Drinking v relationship issue
(Preview)
I'm struggling with determining what issues are related to alcohol and what are just issues that have noting to do with it. MY AW and I have been married for about 4 years and during our dating and early part of our marriage she was just heavily drinking (but not quite totally uncontrollable) sever...
|
uva25
|
12
|
703
|
|
|
|
I'm new... and need advice
(Preview)
I guess I will try to make this short... because it could get long... But I am 32. My partner is 34. We started dating two years ago. I noticed right away he drank frequent... daily. I just didn't realize how much. About 4-5 months into our relationship, I realized he drank 12-15 beer every night. ...
|
Jle32
|
1
|
446
|
|
|
|
C2C 9-28
(Preview)
The C2C reading for September 28 speaks about practicing the slogan:"Letting go and Letting God". It suggests that when attending an Al-Anon meeting, if we learn to use alanon tools such as placing principles above personalities , letting go of our egos in the safety of Al-Anon roo...
|
hotrod
|
2
|
427
|
|
|
|
Nothing really, just saying hi :-)
(Preview)
Hi MIP family! It's been a while. I've enjoyed my day today. Not that anything went especially right, but I enjoyed it anyway. For starters, it has been school holidays (again). Daughter was to spend this week at her fathers (she wanted to go), and she's been emailing me every day to tell me she's bored,...
|
missmeliss
|
6
|
704
|
|
|
|
best efforts give best results?
(Preview)
If nothing changes nothing changes right? So as I go along the road to happy destiny l make the best effort I can to get the best results. I am yearning to find the happy medium I think I deserve. So I wake up every morning & do the next right thing. I use FROG & fully rely on God & PUSH pray until so...
|
Hoot Nanny
|
2
|
317
|
|
|
|
Acceptance
(Preview)
Today was tough. I did not hear from my ex. As the day went on, and he didn't reach out I couldn't help but feel deflated. I work as a hospice nurse, and I find that lately it's been difficult to focus on the care of my patients because I start to ruminate over what transpired. I reached out to close friends an...
|
Restless Soul
|
8
|
818
|
|
|
|
A Thought for Today ~ Change/Acceptance ~ 9/26/15
(Preview)
Change can only come from a position of acceptance.I think the best way to arrive at personal acceptance is to do an on-going, daily gratitude list. A great idea would be to do it alphabetically, say in a journal, once a day, begin with the letter A and end with Z. That attitude helps us survivethe roug...
|
Debb
|
4
|
559
|
|
|
|
Read Should I stay or should I go by Bancroft and patrissi. Ah and I have completely different views
(Preview)
I have been reading a lot about why I can't just let go. My ah has been moved out about 45 days now. I told him to leave after He relapsed twice since December where he was in a 30 day treatment. Since he has left he has been seeing a therapist, a minister, psychologist, another therapist and going to meeting...
|
Helpangel
|
6
|
564
|
|
|
|
I'm Trying
(Preview)
Short history: AH started his program after an arrest in late April. I found out he was still drinking in late August. He made a promise to stop completely that day.
--- I am trying really really hard to believe him and to detach from my need to search out the truth. But I am having a hard time with it. No, o...
|
EarlyBird
|
8
|
494
|
|
|
|
C2C 9-26
(Preview)
The C2C reading for September 26 speaks about feelings. It points out that anger, resentment, self-pity and fear are merely feelings. They are part of who we are as human beings and neither a bad or good. If I attempt to shut down my negative feelings I also shut down my happiness and joy. It is bett...
|
hotrod
|
6
|
522
|
|
|
|
What a difference a year makes
(Preview)
This time last year, the fuel pump on my truck went in a smaller town outside the capitol city of the state where I live. I completely broke down, sobbing uncontrollably, because although I got the truck into a safe parking spot in a parking lot, it was after 9 pm and I didn't know who to call for a ride home,...
|
Skorpi
|
23
|
873
|
|
|
|
rock bottom
(Preview)
This week has been so low after more than 40 years i finally admitted no myself i really don't want to live like this any more. i have lost family members friends relationships all because i dont know how to say no!
|
fij
|
4
|
606
|
|
|
|
good start to the day!
(Preview)
I just want to share w/ you how amazing life is when I don't complain. I got off to a good start this morning. Kathleen
|
Hoot Nanny
|
3
|
332
|
|