Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

DavidG · DavidG

Hi y'all, asking for feedback from group shares. I am having a crack at re-starting a group in my home town. I believe that I an a natural victim- of the disease- but I do not have to be a martyr. All I have to do is to give it my best shot. The city south of here has four meetings. The biggest one had 15 o...

Lyne · Lyne

Today I am going to a work reunion, seeing people I haven't seen in 30 yrs. Many folks are bringing their spouses. Because (so far) I have chosen to stay with a dry drunk, I didn't even invite her. Although she has good attributes and is not acting alcoholic all of the time, she is also passive aggressi...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

So I had a good laugh at myself today some things are FINALLY getting straightened out at work .. I realize I am not the easiest person all of the time however again .. I get super tired of BS and the older I get the less patience I have for it .. pretty much I call people out where I see it and ask if my perception...

Iamhere · Iamhere

The reading for tomorrow is about First things First, self care and choosing wisely. There does not seem to be enough time in a day during stressful times. We might be tempted to miss a meal, push ourselves to exhaustion and just generally ignore our basic needs. In reality, it's during these tryin...

A nother · A nother

He's gone to the pub again. I've been working so hard to get better at this, I fully accept that I am powerless over alcohol. I'm acting as if it's fine that he's gone to the pub on his own again, but I'm sooo anxious! I've written my diary, gone through the questions in step 1. But now he is on the grog again I'...

luv123 · luv123

We just recently went through a death of a close young loved one. I feel sad. This sadness is also bringing up some other losses and impending losses (went to visit my last living aunt yesterday and she has some major health issues and it is hard to see her looking so fragile---the fragility and uncertai...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! Today's reading in Courage to Change is about the slogan "How important is it?" The author shares that, after living with the chaos of an alcoholic relationship, it can be hard to tell if something is a minor inconvenience or a major crisis. Asking "How important is it?" helps the author d...

uhohcheerio · uhohcheerio

My boyfriend had agreed to stop drinking around me. He did this and I appreciated it a lot. But I knew he was drinking when not around me. I didnt worry too much about that: I went to alanon and he respected my boundaries. But i think that his not drinking around me while not being ready to actually quit caus...

A nother · A nother

This was the subject of the meeting I went to yesterday. I haven't been focusing on one day at a time, but after listening to others in the group yesterday I think I get it. I get so angry about past ''wrongs", and so overwhelmed about what I have coming (selling the house, telling the children we are sepa...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODAT reading for today, 8-14 speaks about the alcoholic finally hitting hiss bottom and reaching for recovery. This reading points out that in the beginning it is extremely important to embrace the fact that both partners in the marriage have been affected by this disease and need a program o...

Jozie · Jozie

I have been in this Program long enough to know that Swimming in Fear is Never a Good thing, but Here I am... Some Know the first 18 years of my life, I Grew up in a Small One Horse town in Eastern US, Well when you live in such a small area, your family grows ten fold by the Time you hit 18, I have a Friend that I hav...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I will make this short because I am in a lot of pain. I have been struggling w an autoimmune condition for years. It has been so difficult but I don't think I mentioned it on here. It makes it hard to live one day at a time. I have been hanging out trying to keep my sanity. I know there are many others who are in wo...

JerryF · JerryF

I thought I had posted about this over the years and then all of my prior post have been eliminated as if I never existed...what a wish heh? I use to work as a BHT, Behavioral Health Therapist in a Recovery Program that gave service to individual addicts and alcoholics and their families; group and on...

A nother · A nother

Ah is at the second wedding today. Whilst picking flowers in the garden my 7 year old paused and said, '' I hope daddy doesn't get drunk today, but I wouldn't be surprised if he does'. My heart stopped and there was a pause and then she said, ''but if he does I won't tell him off. He can't help it.' then she wan...

A nother · A nother

I know we've talked about this before but I'm still really struggling to be around ah. I can't think of a thing to say. I asked him how the wedding was, but as he told me I felt that familiar anger welling up inside. So far today we have talked at length about the weather, about the food shopping and about wha...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

The past week has been beyond stressful with my oldest and OMGOSH I'm extremely over it. My oldest is being incredibly disrespectful and ignoring what I have asked which is DO NOT CALL ME ABOUT THIS AT WORK .. I have a job .. and if I don't have a job you will not have a place to live. This is not just about yo...

mamalioness · mamalioness

Hes on a biggie, this being over two weeks... I call and leave VM but now his cell is full and cannot take calls. so I just test him a "prayers rising" text and keep my distance with love I can't seem to get his enabling friends to back off and let him hit bottom..Each time this happens, he finally surfaces, ...

Lyne · Lyne

Leaning on HP-The author discusses the importance of Step 3: turning our will and life over to God's care. They learned that with good intentions, their suggestions for others may not be helpful. They also learned that fear may be an underlying factor. They realized that they don't always know w...

strangeworld · strangeworld

Hi all. Forgive my all over the place post here. I come here to read quite often but I admittedly don't get to many meetings. Husband got drunk at a party the other night and it was embarrassing for me. He gets loud and extemely animated - I think it is social anxiety mostly. Brief back story. I quit drink...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about how the Al-Anon program is a way to learn and show respect for one another. The writer mentions that in his/her family of origin this wasnt taught, but once in Alanon, the protocols such as taking turns to share by speaking, thanking one another for speak...

JerryF · JerryF

am I ending up at a internet pharmacy when I click on to Miracles in Progress??? Is my Higher Power telling me I should try some new drug??? LOL I get parked at the Pharmacy while the address says Miracles in Progress. Anyone else getting this form of service? ((()))

lookingup · lookingup

As I'm taking baby steps toward moving into an apt,I still haven't made it official,I do know what I got to do. 1st things 1st right? ok I gave my bro several time frames in which to move out,not complying or cooperating, he has been very hard to live with still love him to pieces despite all this, he has pla...

mamalioness · mamalioness

Found this in my library....this was soooo me before recovery....ENjoy the laugh 12-steps of non-recovery ...1) We admitted we were powerless over nothing, that we could manage our lives perfectly and those of anyone else who would allow us to.2) Came to believe there was no power greater than our...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's author acknowledged the draw to let anger bloom at the thought of mistreatment from others. Detachment is not the easy choice, but it helps us avoid damaging ourselves and others.Runaway anger and frustration opens the door to our harming innocent members in our lives and can add to existin...

lookingup · lookingup

C2C reading for Saturday 8-11 speaks about periods of sadness that we all experience The reading points out that this is normal and a part of everyone's life but if we do not use our tools it can become a habit and we will have difficulty shedding the depression., Meetings, readings and talks with spo...

A nother · A nother

I know I need to stop obsessing. But i'm out at a friend's hen do tonight and he is home with the kids. I'm driving as it is quite a distance away (45 mins). He won't hurt the children, I suppose, but will probably put them to bed then start on the wine. I need a life, so I'm going. If he's drunk I will smile and...

Iwantthemiddle · Iwantthemiddle

This afternoon we are going to a family function. Iâm going with my AH and his mother and golden child sister are coming along. They gossip and just talk crap and really donât stop talking. Itâs always about people I donât know and I think why would I want to know? Iâm just struggling with setting boundar...

Freetime · Freetime

The writer shares how the way we keep our home shows the effects of living with alcoholism. One person cannot feel comfortable unless his house is perfectly tidy, which makes him feel in control. Another person lives with clutter, which allows her to isolate and keep people at a distance. The write...

ling · ling

Hi AH very ill. He pushed me so have restriction order not to live at home. He's in his tiny workshop. It's unsafe as workshop. Can an alcoholic give up as he says he's trying but too hard??? Is it that he can't or doesn't want to? I've taken him a duvet and pillow. I need a break. Do I feed him? Where's my resp...

Surfergirl · Surfergirl

I have family visiting for the week and tonight we are ordering dinner as a pre anniversary-post birthday celebration. My AH said he was going to join us but I didn't get my hopes up. About 20 minutes before we are preparing to order he messages and says "I'm not coming it's taking too long" which is code f...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

Hi Everyone, I just wanted to say that I was contacted by HR for to meet this week with them and my boss. I don't know if this is a follow up to my meeting with HR about how my job is going which included discussion of many hours being left to sit with no work to lack of promised training. There has also been load...

mamalioness · mamalioness

I worked today and had a run in with a co-worker, whom I usually get along nicely with....She got ugly with me and I "outed her" about it......I called her on it....I told her that her behaviour was NOT acceptable, rudeness and ugly are never acceptable..no matter what...insults and put downs I will N...

DavidG · DavidG

The price we pay for being with family is emotion... and my FOO did not learn to express emotion in healthy ways... I owe my life to my hometown group... and a life worth living- surely... ...I always maintained my balance in group- in the rooms- by doing my own personal shares. in my small town it was ha...

lookingup · lookingup

for those here that know of my apt moving, ive done all I know to do on my part,phone calls,talking to landlord,along with lots of prayers to my hp on the what when and how part to all this, this was becoming very overwhelming to me thoughts of going from a big house to small apt,ha, with hp help only can make...

Iwantthemiddle · Iwantthemiddle

Hi everyone. Iâm in need of some examples of boundary setting. Iâm really bad at it. Yesterday my mil made us dinner and dropped in to see me at work to give me morning tea. Nice right? However there is always an alterior motive. My husband never calls his Mum. I was never aware until recently that I contro...

A nother · A nother

Husband couldn't hide his enthusiasm for putting the new bed up, so we did it tonight. He is sober tonight. I think this is his way of showing me how relieved he is to be rid of his nagging wife! Painful. I feel so rejected, which makes no sense because I want out of this relationship too!

A nother · A nother

I know I'm posting loads on here, and that much of it isn't enlightened or helpful to others, but I honestly don't know where else to go to sort my feelings out. I can't sleep. I've tried and tried, but it just won't come. My husband went out to the pub tonight. No big traumas when he came home, which I am gr...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's reading in Courage to Change, the author reflects on step 6: Were entirely ready to have HP remove these defects of character. The author shares that they worried whether there would be anything left of themselves if they let go of the defects of character, but decided that the...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning Everyone- Today's reading is about applying the tools we are given in a way that is helpful to our situation. The writer explains that there was a job he/she was not happy with at all; day after day they did the job, relying on Just for Today to get through it. After some time the realizatio...

andromeda · andromeda

So, my Al Anon girlfriends and myself were talking last week about dating alcoholics. We had a speaker at one of our meetings who talked about how she always managed to find the alcoholics on a group of men. ALWAYS. After 2 marriages to practicing alcoholics with no recovery, she was 60 years old when...

DavidG · DavidG

I have this movie at home. I bought the DVD in the Wilson's own garage- at Stepping Stones. in NY state. Early on I read "Lois Remembers". I was always interested in how our hope evolved... and manifested itself... with love... foe many years I fancied Lois and Bill as my mum and dad. Bonded, rather than...

Mcgreuder · Mcgreuder

Permalink Hi guys! Im back again. Really trying to work on some boundaries and having trouble. Im at work today and husband is at home with kids. Husband was out drinking til 3:30, and twin 21 mo olds were up and playing since 6:30 am. He didnt go in there to change their diaper and waited til nanny came a...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODAT reading for 8-7 Speaks about using the slogans and suggest keeping one at the forefront of our mind every day so that our troubles do not crowded out program principles. The reading points out the slogan "let go and let God" suggests that more tightly clutching our problems to our thoughts...

A nother · A nother

And I am so relieved! No tense silences tonight! I know I'm sick, but I had to share.

A nother · A nother

I went to my first face to face meeting today. I'm a bit embarrassed about it because every time I needed to speak I started crying and my voice kind of wailed, even when I only had to read one of the steps. I feel much calmer now though, and kind of wish I'd shared because I could relate to the topic. It was ab...

Elabella · Elabella

So it's been a while since I last posted anything. Lots has happened since then. The situation with my AH got so bad, after several police calls, me getting hit in the face by a giant box that he hurled in my direction during one of his crazy, drunken rage-filled outbursts-he finally agreed that he neede...

Surfergirl · Surfergirl

I remember someone mentioning a book about living with an alcoholic spouse but can't for the life of me remember the title. Anyone? I have a long wait at the hospital this week so I figured I would use my time wisely. Any other suggestions would be great too. Thanks!

JustForMeNow · JustForMeNow

I'm very new to this. I have no background with alcoholism or addiction. I'm taking a crash course with my husband. I have 2 children, 11 and 7. While he told our 11 year old daughter I feel like both kids need to know more. He isn't taking responsibility like he said he would and he has been very angry and...

Lyne · Lyne

Courage & Freedom-The writer today speaks of courage and freedom that he has been given through having a Higher Power. Where he once hesitated and felt helpless, has changed into recognizing that a miracle has already happened. His Higher Power gives him a freedom to make choices, and he is no...

A nother · A nother

Hi again. My husband has decided to plan ahead for a wedding he is attending next week and book himself into the hotel. I have a night away from him (I desperately want to move into my own place with the children so i am completely away from his chaos, but have agreed to wait 6 months so he can get used to the id...

Overcome · Overcome

August 6, 2018MONDAY MORNING AL-ANON MEETING 9 AM EST (6AM PACIFIC)Topic: Is it pity, love or co-dependence. How to know the difference. The 3 A's: Awareness, Acceptance, Action. Open topic as it relates to alcoholism and living with the alcoholic.The website link to the group meeting room is ht...

hotrod · hotrod

A Business meeting was held in the alanon chat room 8- 5i n order to review on line meeting protocols and obtain directions as to "ops status and establish char responsibilities. We discussed banning members or booting them from the chat room and it was agreed that these tools must only be used in dr...

Mcgreuder · Mcgreuder

This is my first experience with al-anon. My husband is not a full-blown alcoholic, but it doesn't seem that there are any outlets (except possibly here) to discuss my issues and get ideas of how to deal with him. He drinks most nights...a few beers if it's a work night, more on weekends. He has these...

hotrod · hotrod

Posting this reading overview for Looking up The Odat reading for today, 8-4 speaks about our our unrealistic expectations of others and ourselves. It points out by relying on this "Defect" we often become angry and DISAPPOINTED because other do not live up to OUR expectations, i have found th...

WestMan · WestMan

Hi all. Been a minute since I last came in here. Just to recap I'm single-dad, ExAW seems to be continuing in recovery and has the kids about 40% of the time. I moved us back in from the country so that we could be closer to work and their school. The kids go to a charter school in our town. I have three kids olde...

DavidG · DavidG

Hi y'all, I wasn't broken when i came here- but my home group was. My mum always taught me- when we get bucked off a horse- get straight back on. If my Alanon group was a horse- I needed to tend to the bleeding and bruises first- before getting back on. I knew when I came- that MIP Alanon did not have a...

Connection · Connection

thank you

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

So, it's been a LONG two weeks between hormones, oldest going to hospital and youngest going to visit friends, my dad popping up from the dead is what a couple friends are saying, I am going through other stuff as well. I am just highly overwhelmed and yet ok too. Yesterday another what I call forest fi...

Iwantthemiddle · Iwantthemiddle

Hi everyone, so I finally had the chance to attend a f2f Al-Anon meeting last night but it was cancelled :( so I attended the AA meeting instead as I was invited to stay. So I find it hard calling my Dad, Mum and husband alcoholics. When I listened to the alcoholics last night they drank day in day out all day...

bud · bud

Hi MIP family, I'm writing from Alaska, where I've enjoyed working the past week. I love it here and am feeling really blessed! I have mixed feelings left over from when my sister called me the other day. She's unstable and looking for attention. I've told her many times that I do not wish to receive phon...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Giving Alanon my best shot... (Preview) Hi y'all, asking for feedback from group shares. I am having a crack at re-starting a group in my home town. I believe that I an a natural victim- of the disease- but I do not have to be a martyr. All I have to do is to give it my best shot. The city south of here has four meetings. The biggest one had 15 o...	DavidG	15	492	Aug 18, 2018 by DavidG
	Down side of staying with my A (Preview) Today I am going to a work reunion, seeing people I haven't seen in 30 yrs. Many folks are bringing their spouses. Because (so far) I have chosen to stay with a dry drunk, I didn't even invite her. Although she has good attributes and is not acting alcoholic all of the time, she is also passive aggressi...	Lyne	10	684	Aug 17, 2018 by el-cee
	Darkly Amusing .. (Preview) So I had a good laugh at myself today some things are FINALLY getting straightened out at work .. I realize I am not the easiest person all of the time however again .. I get super tired of BS and the older I get the less patience I have for it .. pretty much I call people out where I see it and ask if my perception...	SerenityRUS	2	567	Aug 16, 2018 by Bo
	Courage to Change 8/16/19 (Preview) The reading for tomorrow is about First things First, self care and choosing wisely. There does not seem to be enough time in a day during stressful times. We might be tempted to miss a meal, push ourselves to exhaustion and just generally ignore our basic needs. In reality, it's during these tryin...	Iamhere	6	787	Aug 16, 2018 by Iamhere
	Why am I going round in circles??! (Preview) He's gone to the pub again. I've been working so hard to get better at this, I fully accept that I am powerless over alcohol. I'm acting as if it's fine that he's gone to the pub on his own again, but I'm sooo anxious! I've written my diary, gone through the questions in step 1. But now he is on the grog again I'...	A nother	12	599	Aug 16, 2018 by lookingup
	On NOT fixing myself or others (Preview) We just recently went through a death of a close young loved one. I feel sad. This sadness is also bringing up some other losses and impending losses (went to visit my last living aunt yesterday and she has some major health issues and it is hard to see her looking so fragile---the fragility and uncertai...	luv123	6	460	Aug 16, 2018 by mamalioness
	Courage to Change August 15, 2018 (Preview) Hello MIP! Today's reading in Courage to Change is about the slogan "How important is it?" The author shares that, after living with the chaos of an alcoholic relationship, it can be hard to tell if something is a minor inconvenience or a major crisis. Asking "How important is it?" helps the author d...	Skorpi	5	502	Aug 15, 2018 by mamalioness
	He gets so angry and then gets drunk and tells me he loves me and is sorry (Preview) My boyfriend had agreed to stop drinking around me. He did this and I appreciated it a lot. But I knew he was drinking when not around me. I didnt worry too much about that: I went to alanon and he respected my boundaries. But i think that his not drinking around me while not being ready to actually quit caus...	uhohcheerio	12	534	Aug 14, 2018 by milkwood
	One day at a time (Preview) This was the subject of the meeting I went to yesterday. I haven't been focusing on one day at a time, but after listening to others in the group yesterday I think I get it. I get so angry about past ''wrongs", and so overwhelmed about what I have coming (selling the house, telling the children we are sepa...	A nother	8	550	Aug 14, 2018 by mamalioness
	ODAT reading 8-14 (Preview) The ODAT reading for today, 8-14 speaks about the alcoholic finally hitting hiss bottom and reaching for recovery. This reading points out that in the beginning it is extremely important to embrace the fact that both partners in the marriage have been affected by this disease and need a program o...	hotrod	8	498	Aug 14, 2018 by mamalioness
	Stuck in Fear... Of that I Can't Control... (Preview) I have been in this Program long enough to know that Swimming in Fear is Never a Good thing, but Here I am... Some Know the first 18 years of my life, I Grew up in a Small One Horse town in Eastern US, Well when you live in such a small area, your family grows ten fold by the Time you hit 18, I have a Friend that I hav...	Jozie	15	685	Aug 14, 2018 by mamalioness
	in a lot of pain... (Preview) I will make this short because I am in a lot of pain. I have been struggling w an autoimmune condition for years. It has been so difficult but I don't think I mentioned it on here. It makes it hard to live one day at a time. I have been hanging out trying to keep my sanity. I know there are many others who are in wo...	Hoot Nanny	3	369	Aug 14, 2018 by WestMan
	Behavioral Health Counseling (Preview) I thought I had posted about this over the years and then all of my prior post have been eliminated as if I never existed...what a wish heh? I use to work as a BHT, Behavioral Health Therapist in a Recovery Program that gave service to individual addicts and alcoholics and their families; group and on...	JerryF	30	753	Aug 14, 2018 by mamalioness
	My 7 year old has more insight than me! (Preview) Ah is at the second wedding today. Whilst picking flowers in the garden my 7 year old paused and said, '' I hope daddy doesn't get drunk today, but I wouldn't be surprised if he does'. My heart stopped and there was a pause and then she said, ''but if he does I won't tell him off. He can't help it.' then she wan...	A nother	11	511	Aug 13, 2018 by Bo
	Living in silence is killing me! (Preview) I know we've talked about this before but I'm still really struggling to be around ah. I can't think of a thing to say. I asked him how the wedding was, but as he told me I felt that familiar anger welling up inside. So far today we have talked at length about the weather, about the food shopping and about wha...	A nother	14	596	Aug 13, 2018 by Bo
	Boundaries being ignored .. (Preview) The past week has been beyond stressful with my oldest and OMGOSH I'm extremely over it. My oldest is being incredibly disrespectful and ignoring what I have asked which is DO NOT CALL ME ABOUT THIS AT WORK .. I have a job .. and if I don't have a job you will not have a place to live. This is not just about yo...	SerenityRUS	15	622	Aug 13, 2018 by serenity47
	BOTH of my Brothers are missing for over 2 weeks now (Preview) Hes on a biggie, this being over two weeks... I call and leave VM but now his cell is full and cannot take calls. so I just test him a "prayers rising" text and keep my distance with love I can't seem to get his enabling friends to back off and let him hit bottom..Each time this happens, he finally surfaces, ...	mamalioness	19	626	Aug 13, 2018 by mamalioness
	C2C, 8/12 (Preview) Leaning on HP-The author discusses the importance of Step 3: turning our will and life over to God's care. They learned that with good intentions, their suggestions for others may not be helpful. They also learned that fear may be an underlying factor. They realized that they don't always know w...	Lyne	3	323	Aug 13, 2018 by PosiesandPuppies
	Feel Betrayed - Anxiety and sadness through the roof right now (Preview) Hi all. Forgive my all over the place post here. I come here to read quite often but I admittedly don't get to many meetings. Husband got drunk at a party the other night and it was embarrassing for me. He gets loud and extemely animated - I think it is social anxiety mostly. Brief back story. I quit drink...	strangeworld	12	549	Aug 13, 2018 by Iamhere
	Hope for Today Aug 12 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about how the Al-Anon program is a way to learn and show respect for one another. The writer mentions that in his/her family of origin this wasnt taught, but once in Alanon, the protocols such as taking turns to share by speaking, thanking one another for speak...	yanksfan51	6	457	Aug 12, 2018 by mamalioness
	Why ?? (Preview) am I ending up at a internet pharmacy when I click on to Miracles in Progress??? Is my Higher Power telling me I should try some new drug??? LOL I get parked at the Pharmacy while the address says Miracles in Progress. Anyone else getting this form of service? ((()))	JerryF	3	355	Aug 12, 2018 by JerryF
	Roller coaster ride. (Preview) As I'm taking baby steps toward moving into an apt,I still haven't made it official,I do know what I got to do. 1st things 1st right? ok I gave my bro several time frames in which to move out,not complying or cooperating, he has been very hard to live with still love him to pieces despite all this, he has pla...	lookingup	10	495	Aug 11, 2018 by lookingup
	my 12 steps b4 recovery (Preview) Found this in my library....this was soooo me before recovery....ENjoy the laugh 12-steps of non-recovery ...1) We admitted we were powerless over nothing, that we could manage our lives perfectly and those of anyone else who would allow us to.2) Came to believe there was no power greater than our...	mamalioness	8	500	Aug 11, 2018 by Aline
	ODAT 8/9/18 Anger, Detachment (Preview) Today's author acknowledged the draw to let anger bloom at the thought of mistreatment from others. Detachment is not the easy choice, but it helps us avoid damaging ourselves and others.Runaway anger and frustration opens the door to our harming innocent members in our lives and can add to existin...	Enigmatic	10	573	Aug 11, 2018 by Freetime
	CTC 08/11 (Preview) C2C reading for Saturday 8-11 speaks about periods of sadness that we all experience The reading points out that this is normal and a part of everyone's life but if we do not use our tools it can become a habit and we will have difficulty shedding the depression., Meetings, readings and talks with spo...	lookingup	3	340	Aug 11, 2018 by Iamhere
	I'm out tonight. Anxious about what state he will be in when I get home (Preview) I know I need to stop obsessing. But i'm out at a friend's hen do tonight and he is home with the kids. I'm driving as it is quite a distance away (45 mins). He won't hurt the children, I suppose, but will probably put them to bed then start on the wine. I need a life, so I'm going. If he's drunk I will smile and...	A nother	8	475	Aug 11, 2018 by Iamhere
	Anxious :( (Preview) This afternoon we are going to a family function. Iâm going with my AH and his mother and golden child sister are coming along. They gossip and just talk crap and really donât stop talking. Itâs always about people I donât know and I think why would I want to know? Iâm just struggling with setting boundar...	Iwantthemiddle	5	534	Aug 11, 2018 by lookingup
	Courage to Change 8/10 (Preview) The writer shares how the way we keep our home shows the effects of living with alcoholism. One person cannot feel comfortable unless his house is perfectly tidy, which makes him feel in control. Another person lives with clutter, which allows her to isolate and keep people at a distance. The write...	Freetime	4	551	Aug 10, 2018 by Iamhere
	AH very ill (Preview) Hi AH very ill. He pushed me so have restriction order not to live at home. He's in his tiny workshop. It's unsafe as workshop. Can an alcoholic give up as he says he's trying but too hard??? Is it that he can't or doesn't want to? I've taken him a duvet and pillow. I need a break. Do I feed him? Where's my resp...	ling	5	540	Aug 10, 2018 by Iamhere
	Frustrated (Preview) I have family visiting for the week and tonight we are ordering dinner as a pre anniversary-post birthday celebration. My AH said he was going to join us but I didn't get my hopes up. About 20 minutes before we are preparing to order he messages and says "I'm not coming it's taking too long" which is code f...	Surfergirl	27	700	Aug 10, 2018 by Bo
	Meeting with HR ( 1 2 ) (closed) (Preview) Hi Everyone, I just wanted to say that I was contacted by HR for to meet this week with them and my boss. I don't know if this is a follow up to my meeting with HR about how my job is going which included discussion of many hours being left to sit with no work to lack of promised training. There has also been load...	tiredtonite	51	3321	Aug 10, 2018 by SerenityRUS
	We really do teach others how to treat us (Preview) I worked today and had a run in with a co-worker, whom I usually get along nicely with....She got ugly with me and I "outed her" about it......I called her on it....I told her that her behaviour was NOT acceptable, rudeness and ugly are never acceptable..no matter what...insults and put downs I will N...	mamalioness	18	654	Aug 10, 2018 by mamalioness
	Boiled up with anger over old things... (Preview) The price we pay for being with family is emotion... and my FOO did not learn to express emotion in healthy ways... I owe my life to my hometown group... and a life worth living- surely... ...I always maintained my balance in group- in the rooms- by doing my own personal shares. in my small town it was ha...	DavidG	17	629	Aug 10, 2018 by Aline
	Update (Preview) for those here that know of my apt moving, ive done all I know to do on my part,phone calls,talking to landlord,along with lots of prayers to my hp on the what when and how part to all this, this was becoming very overwhelming to me thoughts of going from a big house to small apt,ha, with hp help only can make...	lookingup	10	506	Aug 9, 2018 by lookingup
	Mother in law detachment and boundaries (Preview) Hi everyone. Iâm in need of some examples of boundary setting. Iâm really bad at it. Yesterday my mil made us dinner and dropped in to see me at work to give me morning tea. Nice right? However there is always an alterior motive. My husband never calls his Mum. I was never aware until recently that I contro...	Iwantthemiddle	3	583	Aug 9, 2018 by Bo
	The new bed is up, the mattress arrives tomorrow. (Preview) Husband couldn't hide his enthusiasm for putting the new bed up, so we did it tonight. He is sober tonight. I think this is his way of showing me how relieved he is to be rid of his nagging wife! Painful. I feel so rejected, which makes no sense because I want out of this relationship too!	A nother	3	545	Aug 9, 2018 by Bo
	I'm having another sleepless night (Preview) I know I'm posting loads on here, and that much of it isn't enlightened or helpful to others, but I honestly don't know where else to go to sort my feelings out. I can't sleep. I've tried and tried, but it just won't come. My husband went out to the pub tonight. No big traumas when he came home, which I am gr...	A nother	10	649	Aug 9, 2018 by mamalioness
	Courage to Change August 8 2018 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's reading in Courage to Change, the author reflects on step 6: Were entirely ready to have HP remove these defects of character. The author shares that they worried whether there would be anything left of themselves if they let go of the defects of character, but decided that the...	Skorpi	3	629	Aug 8, 2018 by Iamhere
	Hope for Today Aug 5 (Preview) Good morning Everyone- Today's reading is about applying the tools we are given in a way that is helpful to our situation. The writer explains that there was a job he/she was not happy with at all; day after day they did the job, relying on Just for Today to get through it. After some time the realizatio...	yanksfan51	7	574	Aug 8, 2018 by A nother
	Would you date an alcoholic who has a recovery program? (Preview) So, my Al Anon girlfriends and myself were talking last week about dating alcoholics. We had a speaker at one of our meetings who talked about how she always managed to find the alcoholics on a group of men. ALWAYS. After 2 marriages to practicing alcoholics with no recovery, she was 60 years old when...	andromeda	18	714	Aug 8, 2018 by Green Eyes
	Our founders... (Preview) I have this movie at home. I bought the DVD in the Wilson's own garage- at Stepping Stones. in NY state. Early on I read "Lois Remembers". I was always interested in how our hope evolved... and manifested itself... with love... foe many years I fancied Lois and Bill as my mum and dad. Bonded, rather than...	DavidG	3	525	Aug 8, 2018 by DavidG
	What boundary do I set for my husband? (Preview) Permalink Hi guys! Im back again. Really trying to work on some boundaries and having trouble. Im at work today and husband is at home with kids. Husband was out drinking til 3:30, and twin 21 mo olds were up and playing since 6:30 am. He didnt go in there to change their diaper and waited til nanny came a...	Mcgreuder	6	559	Aug 7, 2018 by Bo
	ODAT Reading 8-7 (Preview) The ODAT reading for 8-7 Speaks about using the slogans and suggest keeping one at the forefront of our mind every day so that our troubles do not crowded out program principles. The reading points out the slogan "let go and let God" suggests that more tightly clutching our problems to our thoughts...	hotrod	4	460	Aug 7, 2018 by mamalioness
	He's 'nipped down the road for an hour' (Preview) And I am so relieved! No tense silences tonight! I know I'm sick, but I had to share.	A nother	5	492	Aug 7, 2018 by mamalioness
	I couldn't share in my first meeting, so I'm putting it here. (Preview) I went to my first face to face meeting today. I'm a bit embarrassed about it because every time I needed to speak I started crying and my voice kind of wailed, even when I only had to read one of the steps. I feel much calmer now though, and kind of wish I'd shared because I could relate to the topic. It was ab...	A nother	10	521	Aug 7, 2018 by Bo
	Focussing on me- major life changes... (Preview) So it's been a while since I last posted anything. Lots has happened since then. The situation with my AH got so bad, after several police calls, me getting hit in the face by a giant box that he hurled in my direction during one of his crazy, drunken rage-filled outbursts-he finally agreed that he neede...	Elabella	10	530	Aug 7, 2018 by JerryF
	Reading material (Preview) I remember someone mentioning a book about living with an alcoholic spouse but can't for the life of me remember the title. Anyone? I have a long wait at the hospital this week so I figured I would use my time wisely. Any other suggestions would be great too. Thanks!	Surfergirl	11	573	Aug 6, 2018 by Surfergirl
	talking to children (Preview) I'm very new to this. I have no background with alcoholism or addiction. I'm taking a crash course with my husband. I have 2 children, 11 and 7. While he told our 11 year old daughter I feel like both kids need to know more. He isn't taking responsibility like he said he would and he has been very angry and...	JustForMeNow	6	375	Aug 6, 2018 by JustForMeNow
	C2C, 8/6 (Preview) Courage & Freedom-The writer today speaks of courage and freedom that he has been given through having a Higher Power. Where he once hesitated and felt helpless, has changed into recognizing that a miracle has already happened. His Higher Power gives him a freedom to make choices, and he is no...	Lyne	4	340	Aug 6, 2018 by Iamhere
	What do you do to keep focused on yourself? (Preview) Hi again. My husband has decided to plan ahead for a wedding he is attending next week and book himself into the hotel. I have a night away from him (I desperately want to move into my own place with the children so i am completely away from his chaos, but have agreed to wait 6 months so he can get used to the id...	A nother	5	474	Aug 6, 2018 by Aloha
	Monday morning meeting starting now in chat (Preview) August 6, 2018MONDAY MORNING AL-ANON MEETING 9 AM EST (6AM PACIFIC)Topic: Is it pity, love or co-dependence. How to know the difference. The 3 A's: Awareness, Acceptance, Action. Open topic as it relates to alcoholism and living with the alcoholic.The website link to the group meeting room is ht...	Overcome	1	322	Aug 6, 2018 by hotrod
	Business meeting (Preview) A Business meeting was held in the alanon chat room 8- 5i n order to review on line meeting protocols and obtain directions as to "ops status and establish char responsibilities. We discussed banning members or booting them from the chat room and it was agreed that these tools must only be used in dr...	hotrod	2	320	Aug 5, 2018 by hotrod
	Binge Drinking Husband (Preview) This is my first experience with al-anon. My husband is not a full-blown alcoholic, but it doesn't seem that there are any outlets (except possibly here) to discuss my issues and get ideas of how to deal with him. He drinks most nights...a few beers if it's a work night, more on weekends. He has these...	Mcgreuder	38	11481	Aug 5, 2018 by Mcgreuder
	ODAT reading for 8-4 (Preview) Posting this reading overview for Looking up The Odat reading for today, 8-4 speaks about our our unrealistic expectations of others and ourselves. It points out by relying on this "Defect" we often become angry and DISAPPOINTED because other do not live up to OUR expectations, i have found th...	hotrod	4	342	Aug 5, 2018 by lookingup
	Decision was made but still struggling with it. (Preview) Hi all. Been a minute since I last came in here. Just to recap I'm single-dad, ExAW seems to be continuing in recovery and has the kids about 40% of the time. I moved us back in from the country so that we could be closer to work and their school. The kids go to a charter school in our town. I have three kids olde...	WestMan	9	1546	Aug 4, 2018 by PosiesandPuppies
	Alanon is the power of many... (Preview) Hi y'all, I wasn't broken when i came here- but my home group was. My mum always taught me- when we get bucked off a horse- get straight back on. If my Alanon group was a horse- I needed to tend to the bleeding and bruises first- before getting back on. I knew when I came- that MIP Alanon did not have a...	DavidG	8	452	Aug 4, 2018 by hotrod
	can someone let me know when the online meetings are held. I could use some supprt (Preview) thank you	Connection	2	417	Aug 4, 2018 by Overcome
	Update on 2 Weeks .. lol (Preview) So, it's been a LONG two weeks between hormones, oldest going to hospital and youngest going to visit friends, my dad popping up from the dead is what a couple friends are saying, I am going through other stuff as well. I am just highly overwhelmed and yet ok too. Yesterday another what I call forest fi...	SerenityRUS	8	447	Aug 4, 2018 by andromeda
	Alcoholic or not alcoholic (Preview) Hi everyone, so I finally had the chance to attend a f2f Al-Anon meeting last night but it was cancelled :( so I attended the AA meeting instead as I was invited to stay. So I find it hard calling my Dad, Mum and husband alcoholics. When I listened to the alcoholics last night they drank day in day out all day...	Iwantthemiddle	13	850	Aug 3, 2018 by Kcsnooze
	Need help with forgiveness please (Preview) Hi MIP family, I'm writing from Alaska, where I've enjoyed working the past week. I love it here and am feeling really blessed! I have mixed feelings left over from when my sister called me the other day. She's unstable and looking for attention. I've told her many times that I do not wish to receive phon...	bud	15	1951	Aug 3, 2018 by bud
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.