Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's reading the author reflects on life before Al-Anon. The author felt as though life was on hold. They wanted change, and tried to MAKE it happen, but the changes the author wanted weren't changes in their power to make. The author is an action-taker, and feels better when doing so...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's page reminds us that AlAnon is not a single use service but of great value if used throughout our life. We change, life changes, but we will never run out of character defects or need for spiritual reassessment.The author remembered this after having slipped into an unhappy state of thinking...

Lyne · Lyne

The reading for Monday, 10/5, reminds us that to Think gives us the choice about where to put our attention. At times our thoughts may be on depression, doom sayings, and/or complaining, but its much more productive to look for positive qualities in ourselves, our circumstances, and in other human...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about breaking the big picture into smaller steps, especially as it applies to making changes in our lives. The writer uses a metaphor about having old and out of date wallpaper up in the kitchen. Rather than replace it, the writer begins to accept it so that h...

JerryF · JerryF

That is for my wife who is an Al-Anon member and worker of the program also. She wanted to keep the info anonymous but isn't my Higher Power I get to spill the beans now and then again later just to let her know I am still in the house and family and a recovering man to deal with...LOL We celebrate the same...

JerryF · JerryF

Just finished our weekly Thursday ZOOM facebook meeting and as usual for me as a gift from HP it was a winner. Grateful to have it and suggest we all make use of it. ((((hugs))))

Freetime · Freetime

Service and recovery -- the author of today's page finds that service to the Al-Anon group is essential to personal recovery, specifically because it brings them into contact with newcomers, which is a reminder of what is really important. Remembering what it was like to first come into Al-Anon, t...

PosiesandPuppies · PosiesandPuppies

Today I felt like taking/sharing knowledge from The Language of Letting Go - by Melody Beattie Getting Through the Discomfort "Our goal in recovery is to make ourselves feel comfortable, peaceful, content. Happy. We want to be at peace with ourselves and our environment. Sometimes, to do that, we n...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about the power of service within the program. The writer details coming to the program and finding a place where our opinions mattered. Encouraged to be part of the service, the writer realized this could take the form of everything from setting up/breakin...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading is about one of our tools - the support through fellowship when we are in need. The writing suggests that racing and crashing thoughts going through our minds - memories, broken promises, fears about the future, failed expectations of self & others - familiar chaos that we can n...

Skorpi · Skorpi

In today's reading, the author reflects on the slogan "Just for today" - There are many things to try out, just for today - a new behavior, a different point of view, a pattern of behavior, a more positive response. The author suggests that maybe, life is a series of experiments in which some succeed and...

Andrea253 · Andrea253

Hi everyone, hoping to get your advice on this. My younger brother has been struggling with alcohol use for a few years, but things have been significantly worse the last couple months. I don't think he would meet the criteria for alcoholism, but there are many concerning signs--drinking alone, dr...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Can we Listen and Learn from all shares in AlAnon? Today's writer first thought not, as not all in AlAnon follow suggestions such as not giving advice to others, or they may choose to constantly blame the alcoholic for how they feel.The page suggests, however, that this is the perfect time to analyze o...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I said goodbye to my mom tonight. Said what I had to say. She heard me. She is non responsive. Can't say much more but my family is coming up even though it is not a good idea. I need support as I go through this journey.

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

For all you who don't my story: I have been going down the path of letting go of my mom for several years now. She has been fighting mental illness for a long time as well. Now the time has come to really starting to say my final goodbyes. She is failing & is about 200 miles away from me in assisted living....

PosiesandPuppies · PosiesandPuppies

Hello MIP! Today's reading from C2C is about feelings. The book talks about when the author first came to Al-Anon... the feelings they had, anger, resentment, fear, jealousy were all wrapped up in one adjective, "bad." Al-Anon helped the author to see and to understand that feelings are neither goo...

Lyne · Lyne

The reading for Monday, 9/28, reflects upon why we go to alanon: to learn about alcoholism and its devastating results, that there is no cure, but sobriety is possible through AA, WHEN THE ALCOHOLIC IS READY. We also learn that we too, went downhill, and an honest appraisal of ourselves leads to imp...

DavidG · DavidG

I have a letter on my table... three foolscap pages of neatly written words... I have always loved letter- from when i was a kid- both sending and receiving... My nephew's partner responded to a card I sent to her treatment centre. Have been there myself, [as a family member] i saw the need for outsi...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Happy Thursday MIP family. Today's reading discusses how working the program helps us place our problems in true perspective. The quote of the day is from the Al-Anon suggested welcome - ". . . As we learn to place our problem in its true perspective, we find it loses its power to dominate our thought...

Freetime · Freetime

Step Three -- the author of today's page takes it over and over again, but usually waits until a problem is overwhelming before turning it over to the care of a Higher Power. The author is working on placing their entire will and life into their Higher Power's hands willingly, no matter what, writing "....

JerryF · JerryF

I haven't seen or read this pamphlet for a long time. My wife had it in her literature for a while and handed it to me this evening as I was reading Al-Anon literature. The title is THREE VIEWS OF AL-ANON...Alcoholics Speak to the Family. It was composed for Al-Anon by AA and is very telling. I believ...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I haven't been on here in a very long time I think. I am curious why I am unable to get on the mobile app? I just wonder. Things are better in my life after a lot of setbacks. I really need to get back on track. I have been trying to live w faith over fear. It has been easier w time. I feel some sense of relief. I have...

Maresie888 · Maresie888

One of the charecteristics of being in a relationship with an alcoholic is having a hard time. No matter what the alcoholic seems to.make life harder, much much harder. I already have a full olate. In a oandemic year that can put someone over the edge. This is a tine for me to be even mire cautious. In my...

DavidG · DavidG

Hi y'all... Spring is here- but the mornings are still cool. So I did my Step 11 in bed- stretched out like a cat. A good healthy cough often kicks starts my day. I have done a lot of breathing work over the last 5 years. Much more idea now of how a healthy body works. I do my meditation when I wake up- and do...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! Another perfectly timed C2C reading for me today! In today's reading, the author reflects on one of their character flaws - responding in kind to behavior directed at the author. Reacting to insults with insults, or rudeness with rudeness. One day, the author noticed that an Al-Anon fri...

Iamhere · Iamhere

I am blessed and humbled to celebrate my birthday with my brother from another mother, Jerry! Happy, happy birthday brother - please know I am extremely grateful to have you be a part of my journey! May this day be lovely for you and me and all of MIP. I am posting the daily for 9/19, Saturday, for PnP. Sh...

Lyne · Lyne

To be honest, I got stuck in a bad place for a few weeks. I have had multiple stressors, none life-threatening, but I couldnt overcome my defeatist mind set. This hasnt happened to me in several years. Usually my tools kick right in and Im back on track. I have focused hard especially on acceptance o...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

What we choose to focus on determines what looms largest in our mind. Today's reading reminds us that we have a choice: negatives and small annoyances that will grow into resentments, or positives that can also grow, that broaden our sense of well being and effectively reduce the influence and appea...

Ems298 · Ems298

My Brothers death from liver cirrhosis Hi everyone. Id like to share my story which is still very raw but this feels like the right place and the right time. My brother was an alcoholic for some years. It only became apparent to what extent around 2.5 years ago though. This was when him and his wife se...

DavidG · DavidG

Kia ora koutou... Howdy y'all... ... Generally I would get up on Saturday morning and share something. It is much later in the day now. Being a member of this group is like having four or more meetings a week. The scope is immense. And our members are drawn from every point in the globe- a great contras...

Lyne · Lyne

For Monday, 9/21, the writer talks about dreading change and being comfortable with chaos. Since change is inevitable, the author decided not to assume that change is bad. Actually, they see that changes have had a positive effect, such as coming to alanon. The writer still has many fears, but tr...

Freetime · Freetime

The author of today's reading in Hope for Today came into Al-Anon not interested in a Higher Power and skeptical of all the God references in the Twelve Steps. They didn't think they wanted or needed a higher power. Others in the program shared their own experiences without telling the author what to...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Todays reading is a description of the reason we come together in Alanon. The writer describes feeling different when he/she began attending meetings. It is difficult for the writer to see any similarity between him-her/self and others in the meetings. Although there was a...

Kokopelli · Kokopelli

So while going through the process of divorcing my AH we are still in the same house. Every day I get my guilt trip lectures from 15 minutes to an hour, then switches to begging and pleading, then repeat. On the days and nights he decides to argue with me that it's my fault and leave to a friend's house, I a...

mamalioness · mamalioness

Hey everyone!! Missed you guys, and after Linda went to nursing home, I really began to THINK, reflect on WHY so many back spasms, bee stings, seems my body was under some "attack" the bee sting was my not paying attention but the spasms, I truly believe are stored pain, trying to get out With no Linda to...

mamalioness · mamalioness

When Betty passed away, I felt like the entire bottom of this boat got blown away...Didn't know what to do or what to think, didn't know if I even wanted to hang out here at all. But BOTH of you have done such a great job, not taking her place as that is hers, noone could do that, but you two have filled her spac...

Fedora · Fedora

Today is a strange day. I finally realized that I am not going to be more clever than Alcoholism. For all my smarts, living with an active alcoholic is requiring too many mental (and financial) gymnastics in order to survive. So I told the spouse that we are done. He actually told me that he was going to...

Maresie888 · Maresie888

I still have to deal with my forner roommate because my dog is atayimg at his house. I am within a few weeks of being able to bring ny dog back to the building i live in. The rennovation of the building (which has been all year) is almost over For 20 years I have been friends with someone who deliberately tri...

Skorpi · Skorpi

In today's reading from courage to change, the author reflects on how, in the face of seemingly impossible problems, it is easy to believe that our most negative thoughts indicate reality. Worst-case-scenarios are plead in a convincing way, and a positive outcome seems impossible. However, the l...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Posting early for tomorrow....the reading discusses the reality that all humans want to fit in and be a part of. Balance is the key and most of us who arrived at Al-Anon affected by this disease lost our balance along the way. People pleasing becomes destructive when we ignore our own needs and sacri...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's page touches on a foundational concept of AlAnon: The level of felt Serenity is ours to control or give away, determined in part by how we choose to respond to people and situations around us.If we stop reacting to or acting upon everything that comes our way, instead choosing the factors that...

Friedmom · Friedmom

Hi, I'm new here and struggling with not being a co-dependent enabler for my dual diagnosis daughter. I know there are steps, but how do I find them? Where do I begin? I'd like to jump right in and learn as much as I can to try to make this horrific pain and devastation become less intense. I'd really like to...

DavidG · DavidG

Our welfare authorities are called Oranga Tamariki, or OT for short. The name means "healthy children". A goal and a vision that most everyone share. My nephew and partner had had their two kids taken off of them- and they are in foster care. I won't tell their story, as such, but share mine- and the...

Geoff · Geoff

So I was told yesterday that my AH wife has been going around and telling all the guys she works with that we are separated and not that we are on a trial separation as we agreed too. I guess I was the only one who was under the impression was a trial to figure out what she wanted. So I sent a text to her family so t...

Lyne · Lyne

The reading for Monday, 9/7, says that we should not look for pity. We should not expect other members to tell us our resentments are justified, nor should we take aggressive action. We hopefully will learn to change the way we see our family problems, and resist aggression by using dignity and pois...

Kokopelli · Kokopelli

Having to divorce my AH becuase I need to not because I want to has started making me think of all the traditions we have created in the past 17 years. With Fall right around the corner, Fall was our favorite season. We hosted a chili gathering, always spent Thanksgiving with just us, football watching,...

Lyne · Lyne

The reading for Monday, 9/14, talks about how the author decided it was best not to hope for anything. Life lessons were too painful, hopes became shattered, and despair set in. The writer says eventually they were completely shut down emotionally, and they refused to care or hope for anything. Bu...

Geoff · Geoff

Boundaries these are the guide lines we agreed too when getting together. There were some simple ones like don't commit adultery. When this happened and I chose to try to work it out we setup other boundaries. Like personal issue between the two of us is only meant for therapy or close family not a membe...

DavidG · DavidG

i bike around the valley a fair bit. The bike has about 18 gears. A long way away from the old bone shaker I rode as a kid. About 12 years ago i was biking around the lake. I looked around and realised that the trees were moving around- and even the hills were moving. The hills moved much slower than th...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone: The focus of todays reading is self awareness and how it can help us navigate the experiences of our lives. The writer describes having grown up with an alcoholic father who flew into rages. Because of the fear associated with these, the writer often would attack or provoke fi...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's page asks for our reflection to identify what really holds us back from turning things over to a higher power (HP) or God. It may not be an HP issue, or nature of the problems we hold on to. It likely is a growth opportunity to Let Go, Let God/HP.There is a cost to putting faith in something greater:...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading is all about denial. It suggests that when we come to Al-Anon, we often don't even recognize the disease of alcoholism in our lives, let alone how far it has affected and impacted us. As denial begins to lift, we often are horrified at the lies we told ourselves and others. The readin...

Freetime · Freetime

Doing the Fourth Step inventory, the author of today's reading thought they were doing it all wrong. Then they realized, with Higher Power's help, that their life-long problem had been that they always felt inadequate -- no matter what they were doing, it wasn't good enough. Now they have a better...

Geoff · Geoff

Well after 4 days of this. She spoke with her sponsor ( a woman) and her counselor/therapist from the center (the only one I trust he is a nice guy). They both recommended that we do a trial separation for 2weeks to see if this is what she and I actually want. I have been broken up all day cause I knew that this...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's reading in C2C, the author shares that they sometimes don't know how to ask for help. And so, instead of asking for help in an Al-Anon meeting, the author sits quietly and listens. From the outside, maybe people think everything is fine because the author might look calm, when in...

Maresie888 · Maresie888

This is the tine of year that I.usually simply slip and slide into wallowing in self pity. I get into comparison with s few se kn ected targets. Of courss I can only imagine wgar other people have. I do not really know Thiz year with Covid 19, having to move out of ny apartment, being sick, being separate...

Geoff · Geoff

She is going to stay here and apparently we are separated but going to stay under the same roof. I told her she needs to decide what to do by the end of the week. I am not sure if I can handle being close to her as I just want to kiss and hold her. All I get to do is watch her walk away and I don't have a clue if this is th...

SunnyFrogs · SunnyFrogs

It's true,all my expectations with/of AH always lead to disappointment. Why is that so hard to accept? Why is it so hard to stop expecting anything better or different? Every single time I expect something I am setting my own self up. He's not doing that to me,I am doing this to myself. I don't know wh...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about the strength of alanon literature and the support by others in Alanon, especially when getting to in person meetings is not feasible. The writer describes the Lone Member Service; this is something I am not familiar with but it is described as a way for...

Geoff · Geoff

Well we talked it out this morning over coffee. It turns out I was right she isn't in love with me she was just trying to make it work for convenience and the kids she doesn't share the same feeling I do for her. We are going to try separation see what happens from there.. She cannot invest anytime into our r...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Courage to Change October 7 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's reading the author reflects on life before Al-Anon. The author felt as though life was on hold. They wanted change, and tried to MAKE it happen, but the changes the author wanted weren't changes in their power to make. The author is an action-taker, and feels better when doing so...	Skorpi	4	437	Oct 7, 2020 by Maresie888
	10/6/20 Courage 2 Change: AlAnon for Life (Preview) Today's page reminds us that AlAnon is not a single use service but of great value if used throughout our life. We change, life changes, but we will never run out of character defects or need for spiritual reassessment.The author remembered this after having slipped into an unhappy state of thinking...	Enigmatic	4	380	Oct 6, 2020 by Maresie888
	C2C, 10/5 (Preview) The reading for Monday, 10/5, reminds us that to Think gives us the choice about where to put our attention. At times our thoughts may be on depression, doom sayings, and/or complaining, but its much more productive to look for positive qualities in ourselves, our circumstances, and in other human...	Lyne	3	1332	Oct 5, 2020 by JerryF
	Hope for Today Oct 4 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about breaking the big picture into smaller steps, especially as it applies to making changes in our lives. The writer uses a metaphor about having old and out of date wallpaper up in the kitchen. Rather than replace it, the writer begins to accept it so that h...	yanksfan51	3	1082	Oct 4, 2020 by Iamhere
	So Happy Birthday any way... (Preview) That is for my wife who is an Al-Anon member and worker of the program also. She wanted to keep the info anonymous but isn't my Higher Power I get to spill the beans now and then again later just to let her know I am still in the house and family and a recovering man to deal with...LOL We celebrate the same...	JerryF	6	453	Oct 4, 2020 by Hoot Nanny
	Z00M....DIFFERENT BUT SAME. (Preview) Just finished our weekly Thursday ZOOM facebook meeting and as usual for me as a gift from HP it was a winner. Grateful to have it and suggest we all make use of it. ((((hugs))))	JerryF	5	1025	Oct 3, 2020 by DavidG
	Courage to Change 10/2 (Preview) Service and recovery -- the author of today's page finds that service to the Al-Anon group is essential to personal recovery, specifically because it brings them into contact with newcomers, which is a reminder of what is really important. Remembering what it was like to first come into Al-Anon, t...	Freetime	4	444	Oct 3, 2020 by Maresie888
	SATURDAY 10/3/2020 (Preview) Today I felt like taking/sharing knowledge from The Language of Letting Go - by Melody Beattie Getting Through the Discomfort "Our goal in recovery is to make ourselves feel comfortable, peaceful, content. Happy. We want to be at peace with ourselves and our environment. Sometimes, to do that, we n...	PosiesandPuppies	1	318	Oct 3, 2020 by Maresie888
	Hope for Today Sept 27 (Preview) Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about the power of service within the program. The writer details coming to the program and finding a place where our opinions mattered. Encouraged to be part of the service, the writer realized this could take the form of everything from setting up/breakin...	yanksfan51	4	363	Oct 3, 2020 by Maresie888
	Courage to Change 10/1 (Preview) Today's reading is about one of our tools - the support through fellowship when we are in need. The writing suggests that racing and crashing thoughts going through our minds - memories, broken promises, fears about the future, failed expectations of self & others - familiar chaos that we can n...	Iamhere	3	351	Oct 1, 2020 by Maresie888
	Courage to Change September 30 (Preview) In today's reading, the author reflects on the slogan "Just for today" - There are many things to try out, just for today - a new behavior, a different point of view, a pattern of behavior, a more positive response. The author suggests that maybe, life is a series of experiments in which some succeed and...	Skorpi	4	367	Sep 30, 2020 by DavidG
	Advice to avoid projecting (Preview) Hi everyone, hoping to get your advice on this. My younger brother has been struggling with alcohol use for a few years, but things have been significantly worse the last couple months. I don't think he would meet the criteria for alcoholism, but there are many concerning signs--drinking alone, dr...	Andrea253	8	498	Sep 30, 2020 by Iamhere
	9/29/20 ODAT – Listen and Learn (Preview) Can we Listen and Learn from all shares in AlAnon? Today's writer first thought not, as not all in AlAnon follow suggestions such as not giving advice to others, or they may choose to constantly blame the alcoholic for how they feel.The page suggests, however, that this is the perfect time to analyze o...	Enigmatic	2	418	Sep 30, 2020 by Iamhere
	Saying goodbye (Preview) I said goodbye to my mom tonight. Said what I had to say. She heard me. She is non responsive. Can't say much more but my family is coming up even though it is not a good idea. I need support as I go through this journey.	Hoot Nanny	4	347	Sep 30, 2020 by PosiesandPuppies
	My mom...she's headed down that path (Preview) For all you who don't my story: I have been going down the path of letting go of my mom for several years now. She has been fighting mental illness for a long time as well. Now the time has come to really starting to say my final goodbyes. She is failing & is about 200 miles away from me in assisted living....	Hoot Nanny	5	366	Sep 29, 2020 by Jen
	COURAGE TO CHANGE Sept 26 (Preview) Hello MIP! Today's reading from C2C is about feelings. The book talks about when the author first came to Al-Anon... the feelings they had, anger, resentment, fear, jealousy were all wrapped up in one adjective, "bad." Al-Anon helped the author to see and to understand that feelings are neither goo...	PosiesandPuppies	13	1202	Sep 29, 2020 by Enigmatic
	ODAT in alanon, 9/28 (Preview) The reading for Monday, 9/28, reflects upon why we go to alanon: to learn about alcoholism and its devastating results, that there is no cure, but sobriety is possible through AA, WHEN THE ALCOHOLIC IS READY. We also learn that we too, went downhill, and an honest appraisal of ourselves leads to imp...	Lyne	5	356	Sep 28, 2020 by Maresie888
	Yippee... (Preview) I have a letter on my table... three foolscap pages of neatly written words... I have always loved letter- from when i was a kid- both sending and receiving... My nephew's partner responded to a card I sent to her treatment centre. Have been there myself, [as a family member] i saw the need for outsi...	DavidG	5	369	Sep 28, 2020 by Lyne
	Courage to Change 9/24 (Preview) Happy Thursday MIP family. Today's reading discusses how working the program helps us place our problems in true perspective. The quote of the day is from the Al-Anon suggested welcome - ". . . As we learn to place our problem in its true perspective, we find it loses its power to dominate our thought...	Iamhere	3	485	Sep 27, 2020 by mamalioness
	Courage to Change - September 25 (Preview) Step Three -- the author of today's page takes it over and over again, but usually waits until a problem is overwhelming before turning it over to the care of a Higher Power. The author is working on placing their entire will and life into their Higher Power's hands willingly, no matter what, writing "....	Freetime	6	1129	Sep 27, 2020 by mamalioness
	AA Alanon/Recovery Pamphlet P-15 (Preview) I haven't seen or read this pamphlet for a long time. My wife had it in her literature for a while and handed it to me this evening as I was reading Al-Anon literature. The title is THREE VIEWS OF AL-ANON...Alcoholics Speak to the Family. It was composed for Al-Anon by AA and is very telling. I believ...	JerryF	4	2125	Sep 26, 2020 by PosiesandPuppies
	What happened? (Preview) I haven't been on here in a very long time I think. I am curious why I am unable to get on the mobile app? I just wonder. Things are better in my life after a lot of setbacks. I really need to get back on track. I have been trying to live w faith over fear. It has been easier w time. I feel some sense of relief. I have...	Hoot Nanny	2	737	Sep 25, 2020 by Iamhere
	Doing it the hard way compulsively (Preview) One of the charecteristics of being in a relationship with an alcoholic is having a hard time. No matter what the alcoholic seems to.make life harder, much much harder. I already have a full olate. In a oandemic year that can put someone over the edge. This is a tine for me to be even mire cautious. In my...	Maresie888	0	955	Sep 24, 2020 by Maresie888
	Step 11... (Preview) Hi y'all... Spring is here- but the mornings are still cool. So I did my Step 11 in bed- stretched out like a cat. A good healthy cough often kicks starts my day. I have done a lot of breathing work over the last 5 years. Much more idea now of how a healthy body works. I do my meditation when I wake up- and do...	DavidG	3	2872	Sep 24, 2020 by Maresie888
	Courage to Change Sept. 23 (Preview) Hello MIP! Another perfectly timed C2C reading for me today! In today's reading, the author reflects on one of their character flaws - responding in kind to behavior directed at the author. Reacting to insults with insults, or rudeness with rudeness. One day, the author noticed that an Al-Anon fri...	Skorpi	4	1195	Sep 24, 2020 by Maresie888
	Happy Birthday Jerry and C2C for 9/19 (Preview) I am blessed and humbled to celebrate my birthday with my brother from another mother, Jerry! Happy, happy birthday brother - please know I am extremely grateful to have you be a part of my journey! May this day be lovely for you and me and all of MIP. I am posting the daily for 9/19, Saturday, for PnP. Sh...	Iamhere	23	1769	Sep 24, 2020 by Maresie888
	Pity Party (Preview) To be honest, I got stuck in a bad place for a few weeks. I have had multiple stressors, none life-threatening, but I couldnt overcome my defeatist mind set. This hasnt happened to me in several years. Usually my tools kick right in and Im back on track. I have focused hard especially on acceptance o...	Lyne	3	1402	Sep 23, 2020 by Iamhere
	9/22/20 ODAT - Giant, Terrifying Dust Mites (Preview) What we choose to focus on determines what looms largest in our mind. Today's reading reminds us that we have a choice: negatives and small annoyances that will grow into resentments, or positives that can also grow, that broaden our sense of well being and effectively reduce the influence and appea...	Enigmatic	4	326	Sep 23, 2020 by DavidG
	My Brothers death from liver cirrhosis (Preview) My Brothers death from liver cirrhosis Hi everyone. Id like to share my story which is still very raw but this feels like the right place and the right time. My brother was an alcoholic for some years. It only became apparent to what extent around 2.5 years ago though. This was when him and his wife se...	Ems298	6	3815	Sep 21, 2020 by Maresie888
	A Saturday share... clutter and an uncluttered mind... (Preview) Kia ora koutou... Howdy y'all... ... Generally I would get up on Saturday morning and share something. It is much later in the day now. Being a member of this group is like having four or more meetings a week. The scope is immense. And our members are drawn from every point in the globe- a great contras...	DavidG	11	1555	Sep 21, 2020 by DavidG
	C2C, 9/21 (Preview) For Monday, 9/21, the writer talks about dreading change and being comfortable with chaos. Since change is inevitable, the author decided not to assume that change is bad. Actually, they see that changes have had a positive effect, such as coming to alanon. The writer still has many fears, but tr...	Lyne	4	365	Sep 21, 2020 by Maresie888
	Hope For Today - September 18 (Preview) The author of today's reading in Hope for Today came into Al-Anon not interested in a Higher Power and skeptical of all the God references in the Twelve Steps. They didn't think they wanted or needed a higher power. Others in the program shared their own experiences without telling the author what to...	Freetime	4	477	Sep 20, 2020 by mamalioness
	Hope for Today Sept 20 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Todays reading is a description of the reason we come together in Alanon. The writer describes feeling different when he/she began attending meetings. It is difficult for the writer to see any similarity between him-her/self and others in the meetings. Although there was a...	yanksfan51	4	322	Sep 20, 2020 by JerryF
	What is this lonliness feeling? (Preview) So while going through the process of divorcing my AH we are still in the same house. Every day I get my guilt trip lectures from 15 minutes to an hour, then switches to begging and pleading, then repeat. On the days and nights he decides to argue with me that it's my fault and leave to a friend's house, I a...	Kokopelli	5	729	Sep 20, 2020 by newnoz
	Hey Everybody!!! (Preview) Hey everyone!! Missed you guys, and after Linda went to nursing home, I really began to THINK, reflect on WHY so many back spasms, bee stings, seems my body was under some "attack" the bee sting was my not paying attention but the spasms, I truly believe are stored pain, trying to get out With no Linda to...	mamalioness	13	3009	Sep 18, 2020 by mamalioness
	Gratitude to Iamhere and Freetime (Preview) When Betty passed away, I felt like the entire bottom of this boat got blown away...Didn't know what to do or what to think, didn't know if I even wanted to hang out here at all. But BOTH of you have done such a great job, not taking her place as that is hers, noone could do that, but you two have filled her spac...	mamalioness	5	3089	Sep 18, 2020 by mamalioness
	I am powerless over this disease. I am done trying to pretend I can manage it. Decided I need to file for divorce. (Preview) Today is a strange day. I finally realized that I am not going to be more clever than Alcoholism. For all my smarts, living with an active alcoholic is requiring too many mental (and financial) gymnastics in order to survive. So I told the spouse that we are done. He actually told me that he was going to...	Fedora	9	3383	Sep 18, 2020 by Maresie888
	Not responding as a technique (Preview) I still have to deal with my forner roommate because my dog is atayimg at his house. I am within a few weeks of being able to bring ny dog back to the building i live in. The rennovation of the building (which has been all year) is almost over For 20 years I have been friends with someone who deliberately tri...	Maresie888	6	2843	Sep 17, 2020 by Maresie888
	Courage to Change September 16 (Preview) In today's reading from courage to change, the author reflects on how, in the face of seemingly impossible problems, it is easy to believe that our most negative thoughts indicate reality. Worst-case-scenarios are plead in a convincing way, and a positive outcome seems impossible. However, the l...	Skorpi	3	2814	Sep 17, 2020 by Maresie888
	Courage to Change 9/16 (Preview) Posting early for tomorrow....the reading discusses the reality that all humans want to fit in and be a part of. Balance is the key and most of us who arrived at Al-Anon affected by this disease lost our balance along the way. People pleasing becomes destructive when we ignore our own needs and sacri...	Iamhere	5	464	Sep 17, 2020 by Maresie888
	9/15/20 ODAT - Let it Go... (Preview) Today's page touches on a foundational concept of AlAnon: The level of felt Serenity is ours to control or give away, determined in part by how we choose to respond to people and situations around us.If we stop reacting to or acting upon everything that comes our way, instead choosing the factors that...	Enigmatic	5	325	Sep 15, 2020 by mamalioness
	I'm new here... where do I begin? newbie new help guidance steps (Preview) Hi, I'm new here and struggling with not being a co-dependent enabler for my dual diagnosis daughter. I know there are steps, but how do I find them? Where do I begin? I'd like to jump right in and learn as much as I can to try to make this horrific pain and devastation become less intense. I'd really like to...	Friedmom	9	4449	Sep 15, 2020 by Maresie888
	My best shot... (Preview) Our welfare authorities are called Oranga Tamariki, or OT for short. The name means "healthy children". A goal and a vision that most everyone share. My nephew and partner had had their two kids taken off of them- and they are in foster care. I won't tell their story, as such, but share mine- and the...	DavidG	3	1498	Sep 15, 2020 by Maresie888
	hard decision (Preview) So I was told yesterday that my AH wife has been going around and telling all the guys she works with that we are separated and not that we are on a trial separation as we agreed too. I guess I was the only one who was under the impression was a trial to figure out what she wanted. So I sent a text to her family so t...	Geoff	9	1407	Sep 15, 2020 by Maresie888
	ODAT in alanon, 9/7 (Preview) The reading for Monday, 9/7, says that we should not look for pity. We should not expect other members to tell us our resentments are justified, nor should we take aggressive action. We hopefully will learn to change the way we see our family problems, and resist aggression by using dignity and pois...	Lyne	5	1362	Sep 14, 2020 by mamalioness
	Traditions (Preview) Having to divorce my AH becuase I need to not because I want to has started making me think of all the traditions we have created in the past 17 years. With Fall right around the corner, Fall was our favorite season. We hosted a chili gathering, always spent Thanksgiving with just us, football watching,...	Kokopelli	7	399	Sep 14, 2020 by Bettertomorrow
	C2C, 9/14 (Preview) The reading for Monday, 9/14, talks about how the author decided it was best not to hope for anything. Life lessons were too painful, hopes became shattered, and despair set in. The writer says eventually they were completely shut down emotionally, and they refused to care or hope for anything. Bu...	Lyne	2	243	Sep 13, 2020 by Iamhere
	Boundaries (Preview) Boundaries these are the guide lines we agreed too when getting together. There were some simple ones like don't commit adultery. When this happened and I chose to try to work it out we setup other boundaries. Like personal issue between the two of us is only meant for therapy or close family not a membe...	Geoff	8	2042	Sep 13, 2020 by Maresie888
	Steps one and twelve. (Preview) i bike around the valley a fair bit. The bike has about 18 gears. A long way away from the old bone shaker I rode as a kid. About 12 years ago i was biking around the lake. I looked around and realised that the trees were moving around- and even the hills were moving. The hills moved much slower than th...	DavidG	6	1505	Sep 13, 2020 by serenity47
	Hope for Today Sept 13 (Preview) Good morning everyone: The focus of todays reading is self awareness and how it can help us navigate the experiences of our lives. The writer describes having grown up with an alcoholic father who flew into rages. Because of the fear associated with these, the writer often would attack or provoke fi...	yanksfan51	0	242	Sep 13, 2020 by yanksfan51
	9/8/20 – C2C Struggle w/HP? Might be Control... (Preview) Today's page asks for our reflection to identify what really holds us back from turning things over to a higher power (HP) or God. It may not be an HP issue, or nature of the problems we hold on to. It likely is a growth opportunity to Let Go, Let God/HP.There is a cost to putting faith in something greater:...	Enigmatic	7	4934	Sep 13, 2020 by Maresie888
	Courage to Change 9/10 (Preview) Today's reading is all about denial. It suggests that when we come to Al-Anon, we often don't even recognize the disease of alcoholism in our lives, let alone how far it has affected and impacted us. As denial begins to lift, we often are horrified at the lies we told ourselves and others. The readin...	Iamhere	3	322	Sep 12, 2020 by mamalioness
	Courage to Change - 9/11 (Preview) Doing the Fourth Step inventory, the author of today's reading thought they were doing it all wrong. Then they realized, with Higher Power's help, that their life-long problem had been that they always felt inadequate -- no matter what they were doing, it wasn't good enough. Now they have a better...	Freetime	5	683	Sep 12, 2020 by mamalioness
	If they love you. They will run back not walk. That's what you deserve. (Preview) Well after 4 days of this. She spoke with her sponsor ( a woman) and her counselor/therapist from the center (the only one I trust he is a nice guy). They both recommended that we do a trial separation for 2weeks to see if this is what she and I actually want. I have been broken up all day cause I knew that this...	Geoff	10	2835	Sep 12, 2020 by mamalioness
	Courage to Change September 9 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's reading in C2C, the author shares that they sometimes don't know how to ask for help. And so, instead of asking for help in an Al-Anon meeting, the author sits quietly and listens. From the outside, maybe people think everything is fine because the author might look calm, when in...	Skorpi	7	2954	Sep 12, 2020 by mamalioness
	Responsibiity /the holidays (Preview) This is the tine of year that I.usually simply slip and slide into wallowing in self pity. I get into comparison with s few se kn ected targets. Of courss I can only imagine wgar other people have. I do not really know Thiz year with Covid 19, having to move out of ny apartment, being sick, being separate...	Maresie888	0	1011	Sep 11, 2020 by Maresie888
	what now (Preview) She is going to stay here and apparently we are separated but going to stay under the same roof. I told her she needs to decide what to do by the end of the week. I am not sure if I can handle being close to her as I just want to kiss and hold her. All I get to do is watch her walk away and I don't have a clue if this is th...	Geoff	7	1081	Sep 8, 2020 by Maresie888
	Expectations Are ALWAYS A Disappointment (Preview) It's true,all my expectations with/of AH always lead to disappointment. Why is that so hard to accept? Why is it so hard to stop expecting anything better or different? Every single time I expect something I am setting my own self up. He's not doing that to me,I am doing this to myself. I don't know wh...	SunnyFrogs	11	1264	Sep 6, 2020 by Iamhere
	Hope for Today Sept 6 (Preview) Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about the strength of alanon literature and the support by others in Alanon, especially when getting to in person meetings is not feasible. The writer describes the Lone Member Service; this is something I am not familiar with but it is described as a way for...	yanksfan51	2	943	Sep 6, 2020 by Iamhere
	Changes (Preview) Well we talked it out this morning over coffee. It turns out I was right she isn't in love with me she was just trying to make it work for convenience and the kids she doesn't share the same feeling I do for her. We are going to try separation see what happens from there.. She cannot invest anytime into our r...	Geoff	5	1092	Sep 6, 2020 by Iamhere
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.