Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

almostThere · almostThere

Been thinking about assets thanks to hotrod and MM bringing them to the forefront this week. I think I have, over time, developed a fear of one of my strongest assets. Tenacity. I'm not a quitter. I stick with things through the brutal end. This is an asset, similar to loyalty and devotion, but its im...

JayOhDeeEye · JayOhDeeEye

Hi all. I went to my first Al-Anon meeting last night. It took everything I had to get over my mortification and take the first steps in helping myself learn to cope with my younger sisters addiction. (She has lived with me for 5 - years.) I am learning the steps and working on finding a sponsor - and basi...

Jozie · Jozie

Welp... The Family Believes I'm Crazy... (Something different in my Alcoholic addicted World)...lol I Enjoy Photography, of many Kinds, My Favorite is Outdoors, and I'm Not much of a Fan of People Pics... I'd Much Rather do Critters and Such... BUT... I was Researching my Family at a Local Cemeter...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Wednesday Night Turning Point AFG is my home group and recently I invited an AA member who was being done in by a "qualifier" son. He came back last evening some what loosened up emotionally by the first meeting and God was I not face to face with my old ego and behavior? He ranted and did hi...

Jerry F · Jerry F

For my native brothers and sisters and wishing I was with them up on the Mountain as they stand for our native culture in solidarity while the police and state arrest the young and old who protect our Cultural Spiritual sites. Mauna Kea the sacred mountain considered by so many the center of spiritu...

almostThere · almostThere

Tomorrow marks one month since I started here. I'm counting that as my recovery anniversary. May 24th, 2015. Boy, that's not very long. Kinda scary that I've only been at this one month. Kinda puts things in perspective. (too much [sic] perspective). Deep Breath. Back to work. (God grant me...

joker · joker

I have been reading a lot on the board and its helping me focus on me only. I feel alone a lot of times as my alcoholic BF is not present. He is either working, sleeping or drunk on his day off. He works 6 days a week night shift and on the one day off he has he is drunk out of his mind. He will start drinking at 6 am wh...

Dave2554 · Dave2554

As I have progressed in my recovery one of the things that I began to lament was how many of the things I enjoyed doing, or people I enjoyed seeing, I left behind as my AW's disease spiraled out of control. I used to play golf every weekend, and discovered I had played maybe 2-3 rounds total in the past 3 yea...

hotrod · hotrod

C2C reading for today, June 25 speaks about Step Six--. Becoming entirely ready to have HP remove our defects of character. The reading defines the defects of characters as roadblocks that keep us stranded-- not able to freely travel life's magnificent Boulevard. The reading and goes on to d...

almostThere · almostThere

"Functional Alcoholic" Not having the best day, but still better than it used to be because I have al-anon. Just feel a quick need to vent about this term. It's a veil. Rose colored glasses. A facade. A crutch. A license to steal. A license to abuse. A finger that points at everyone else. ...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's HfT addresses an important concept found in Tradition 5: "Each Al-Anon Group has but one purpose: to help families of Alcoholics. We do this by practicing the 12 Steps ourselves, by encouraging and understanding our alcoholic relatives,..." The contributor acknowledges the...

JukuVee · JukuVee

i'm of an age where I have gotten used to sleeping with a small fan clipped on my headboard blowing on my head. I get terrible night sweats and hot flashes and without my little fan I wake up several times a night. So, since my ah stopped drinking he has had trouble sleeping. When I have trouble sleeping bec...

dandelion2007 · dandelion2007

This is my first time here and my first time writing. Father's day was a rough day for me this year. I'm 30 years old, happily married, and far enough away from my hometown. My father is an alcoholic and a drug addict. My mom divorced my father when I was 4 and is married now. My father never did anything for...

CoopsMom · CoopsMom

My AH and I had to put our 8yr old Bullmastiff to sleep on Wednesday, he was battling a horrible infection that left him unable to walk and in a lot of pain. Anyone who has lost a pet knows how sad it is, they are like family members. In our house there is a huge void now (Literally HUGE, he was 140lbs) I am miss...

likemyheart · likemyheart

well, not completely broke but I bent it - from childhood, my first instinct is to hide it, don't talk about it, don't say anything and maybe it will blow over and no one will notice and I won't get in trouble for it. Of COURSE I didn't play it that way, I'm an adult now! I sent a text to my boss saying what had ha...

hotrod · hotrod

C2C reading for today stress the importance of changing our attitudes and viewing ourselves and our actions in a positive light It points out that as a result of living with the disease of alcoholism we become disappointed by our inability to fix the situation and our self esteem and self worth suff...

Jozie · Jozie

Funny How things Have Changed :) When I Got to this Program I Was a Broken Mess of Emotions, I Assumed EVERYTHING and Knew Nothing... I Panicked at the Sight of On Coming Doom, I took Everything EVERYONE (Even those I Didn't Know) Personal.. And then Of Course Thru My Own Sick Piece of Panic to it and Mad...

a4l · a4l

Winter came early here and I've just concluded a lovely lovely six weeks with my mother. We were grateful to have our time together, us and her grandchildren. It was different this time. Mum is turning 60, she's been a smoker for far too many years and had a hard life thanks to the family disease which bon...

Beatrice · Beatrice

Just stopping in to say Hello, Hope you all doing good and taking those small steps to progress and growing along the way. I know I am Lots of challenges, in my 4th Mod, 8 more to go, passed my Ethics exam ....boy theres a lot to this counseling. Stay well and One Day At A Time... Hugs, Bettina Hey Jerry, A...

almostThere · almostThere

this (((((()))))) when I feel like this )))))) (((((( What a great place. Time to make a gratitude and assets list. Great weather My Kids My Kids My Kids My Kids My Job Good Father's Day New Shoes Most bills paid Son's got a gig on my birthday Daughter home safe from FireFly Festival Gas Tank Half Fu...

almostThere · almostThere

Struggling lately. Back to the beginning. Newbies (like me), it all starts with the Serenity Prayer. I find I'm having to say it out loud or under my breath repeatedly, and at times in a constant loop. The main thing it does, especially when repeated out loud, is to physically provide an audible sti...

mynewlife · mynewlife

It's been quite some time since I have been on. I thought I was doing so well in my recovery, so we'll I don't need to go to meetings or practice daily meditations, denial at its finest I guess..... Briefly, my father is a functioning alcoholic, my brother is what I consider a typical alcoholic; no job,...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

Don't know when I'll be back again .. LOL .. I wish. I know when I will be back. The kids are staying with my mom for 5 weeks total. I will be there for a week. I'm very nervous because she's very needy and I worry about the kids. Sooo grateful for program as well as a warped sense of humor. It will be a good...

Jerry F · Jerry F

God speaks. A while back I got a book, a meditational reader with that title from someone else in program. It was a great read and I passed it on to someone else in program. I wish I had another copy now. When I first got it the title messed with my thinking a bit, like maybe it was backwards or such...&q...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning Everyone- Today's reading is about our ability to trust our intuition in various situations, and the many ways we are able to work the 12th step as we try to carry the message to others. The reading describes a scene where the writer spontaneously decided to hug someone she had been work...

WorkingOnMe · WorkingOnMe

First, I'd like to say what an inspiration everyone has been to me on here. Although I haven't posted myself, I've spent much time reading along with many of your stories and find much encouragement in all of your words. With that being said, I have to admit that in my own situation, I still have a lot of...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Daughter's father has been attempting to engage me in "talking" lately. I never know exactly what he means by this because we don't communicate well and the "talking" always ends with either he expressing bizarre and kind of offensive concerns (like, recently, "shou...

el-cee · el-cee

.... so choose happiness today MIP friends.x

el-cee · el-cee

The disease of alcoholism is a family disease. That means the whole family have symptoms. When we focus solely on the alcoholic we are failing to see ourselves, there's nothing we can do about the drinker, only ourselves. You could spend your whole life complaining about the same boring stuff almost...

nannyg · nannyg

Hi all, For he last few weeks I have been struggling dealing with one of my AS, I just talked to the counselor at the recovery home he is in and it looks lie there may be some major issues far beyond what I was worried about. He needs proper diagnosis and it looks like hes either borderline, narcissistic or m...

missmeliss · missmeliss

2 years ago, when I was just new here, I wrote a post about how I was isolated and socially kind of phobic. I had an on-line friend (I used to play online computer games a lot) from interstate who was going to coming near me on his way to a wedding and had decided to come and meet me (with his wife). And I was so ne...

Iamhere · Iamhere

At times, I am 'stuck' in a moment of doing the next right thing. There are situations that 'normal folks' face that the logical response is accurate and appropriate. However, my experience is that when we are dealing with this disease, the 'normal' can become a catalyst for chaos. Long story short...

lgnutah · lgnutah

I actually felt I was a good mother. I was a stay at home mom who "lived" for her 4 children (spaced 5 years apart so i ciuld give each "his" time in his early years. While I was by no means perfect, I spent my years caring for them, reading to them, making art projects with them, taking...

ruthstoops · ruthstoops

i really don't know what to do. my friend won't try aa. she has all sorts of denialist reasons why not to go. i recently lost a family member (a close one) to alcoholism. i feel as if i have a lot of regrets about that which i know is irrational. but i want to try with this friend, who has kids etc. many sober fr...

catlover26 · catlover26

Last week I went to my first Al-Anon meeting. It is a very small group with only 4 members all of them so much younger than me. I just think it would help if I had a sponsor that I might be able to relate better with. Maybe it wasn't just their age or maybe it was just me. I got the feeling they were a close group an...

texas yankee · texas yankee

I stopped enabling my adult son (30) almost a year ago - it was mainly financial support - occasional rent checks, occasional car insurance, paying the occasional traffic tickets, occasional groceries, occasional utility bills, etc., etc., etc. - of course, I had been doing it with all good intent...

sweetie · sweetie

We have just recently found out that our 40 year old son has a "drinking problem." He was raised in a very religious home with absolutely no history of even drinking alcohol, so this was pretty shocking to us and we don't have a clue how to help him. He has lived in another state for a number of...

lookingup · lookingup

i never learned how to love myself,and just how do you open up to. A freind never had I.need all esh I can get here get me back on track plz.....hugs

PennyJenny010115 · PennyJenny010115

I haven't been on in awhile, but I had posted about my AH who was physically abusive in the past, but not so much anymore, and had even curbed his drinking to a tolerable amount on most occasions, but that the abuse even while sober was still enough to make me want to leave. Well, it really hit the fan last w...

Lyne · Lyne

My father died over 30 years ago, due to lack of self care after a heart attack. I was in my late 20's. So he has missed out on my son growing up, having a daughter of his own, my getting my education which I had had to stop after surgery, and I never got to relate to him as a mature adult. He had some major fl...

hotrod · hotrod

Happy first day of summer. Today's reading in the C2C speaks about the power of meditation. The reading breaks down the definition of meditation into an easy to understand form as It defines meditation as ability to think contemplatively and that to contemplate simply means to " view tho...

00islandgirl00 · 00islandgirl00

I've been in an alcoholic/drug abuse relationship with my husband for over 20 yrs. He is now 2 years sober but the pain and misery is still there. I thought for sure if he stopped doing drugs and alcohol all of problems would go away. I was wrong. It's seems worse now then it was when he was drinking. Befo...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading discusses detaching with love and allowing our A(s) to hit their own bottom by experiencing natural consequences for their choices and actions. It also discusses that with the best of intentions, we have often interrupted their success too. Only through working the program, an...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading reminds us that we are seeking peace through progress, not perfection. Al-Anon helps many of us to cope with crises that we simply could not have managed on our own. The program teaches us to lean on a Power greather than ourselves and discover that we can live and even grow through the...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for June 22 speaks about what it was like when we first entered the rooms and how our attitudes have changed since. It points out that many of us unknowingly gave our power away by our attitudes and belief systems. We did this by blaming others for our situation and feelings and...

Jozie · Jozie

Truth · Truth

I am well rested, had my breakfast, hugged my son ... I am going to spend this beautiful day doing some chores and some play

Praying for all of you on this beautiful day

andromeda · andromeda

Hello everyone, I need advice on a situation with my ds and XAH. My ds will have 2 more years of high school to finish, after being homeschooled for the past 16 years. I have been working full time and that means my XAH has had to step up and handle a lot more of ds' schedule. For now, things are tolerable b...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for June 20 speaks about living with the disease of alcoholism and how we unconsciously develop negative coping tools to protect ourselves from the insanity of the disease. The reading suggests that we often" react :out of fear -- go silent, and keep quiet when confronted ins...

Tampa · Tampa

No matter what I do or how hard I work the steps I find myself after a period of time losing it. Today my active qualifier went out to pick up some tea and powerade for me and to stop by Sears for a sparkplug. He was gone for three hours and my thoughts were racing. I tried calling him and he ignored calls, no res...

lookingup · lookingup

I'm haveing good days when I'm with healthy ppl but wen I'm alone which I live alone I get depressed my freind told me I'd better be careful or I'd fall into another bad relationship,prolly true.im doing good today so all I can do is take one day at a time ,even baby steps........thanks for listening hugs...

Flower49 · Flower49

I am trying to figure out how to discuss this with my A. We have some boundaries in place that we both agreed on. One is that if he knows he will not be home within 20 minutes after work, AA whatever it is he is doing he will call and I too do the same. As of the past couple of weeks, suddenly he no longer calls and w...

missmeliss · missmeliss

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vt1Pwfnh5pc

Debb · Debb

Something dawned on me just now and I googled it ... What part does alcohol consumption play in increasing estrogen in a drinker? I noticed that when AH is beside himself he acts like someone who is not only out of control with emotions but like someone whose hormones are raging as well. I discovered...

hotrod · hotrod

C2C reading for today speaks about taking everything that happens personally and that by doing this I remain a victim and blame others for my discomfort. Accepting life on life's terms is the key . The reading emphasizes the fact that things will not always go our way and that learning how to acc...

missmeliss · missmeliss

I seem to have to learn this lesson over and over and over and over and over. Knowing the pitfalls, knowing the outcomes and knowing the wrong course of action through tried and tested experience just doesn't make bad decisions work any better! For example, for various reasons I am 2 weeks into an 8 week...

KrissySmith · KrissySmith

Seventeen years ago I was attending family week at my then newly wedded husband's rehab facility after he was arrested for dealing drugs. I met a woman in her early forties, whose husband had held a high profile job in their small town before he made headlines for a drunk driving accident. She said it wa...

Mirandac · Mirandac

I guess i needed a reality check. I stated how i felt in an email to ex in just a basic way. Stated i needed more time to move out i was trying to do too much and having a hard time emotionally. I only said "i was hurt very deeply by someone i thought i knew and had trusted" He spins it back that i ha...

Debb · Debb

I am going to share some of what I wrote when in the process of working the the first ten steps and thought I would start at the beginning, with Step 1:We admitted we were powerless over the Alcoholic that our lives had become unmanageable.I began Step One in May of last year, it was a huge relief admitting...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's C2C is one that resonated deeply within my mind and heart early on in my AlAnon journey; it is one of the key texts that allowed me to see the 'Why' and 'How' of Detachment with love. AlAnon introduced me to the concept of allowing the A to face the consequences of their actions; the concept that th...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Assets and Impostors (Preview) Been thinking about assets thanks to hotrod and MM bringing them to the forefront this week. I think I have, over time, developed a fear of one of my strongest assets. Tenacity. I'm not a quitter. I stick with things through the brutal end. This is an asset, similar to loyalty and devotion, but its im...	almostThere	1	389	Jun 26, 2015 by hotrod
	Alcoholism and Narcotics (Preview) Hi all. I went to my first Al-Anon meeting last night. It took everything I had to get over my mortification and take the first steps in helping myself learn to cope with my younger sisters addiction. (She has lived with me for 5 - years.) I am learning the steps and working on finding a sponsor - and basi...	JayOhDeeEye	6	2660	Jun 26, 2015 by Dave2554
	One STONE At a Time .... (Preview) Welp... The Family Believes I'm Crazy... (Something different in my Alcoholic addicted World)...lol I Enjoy Photography, of many Kinds, My Favorite is Outdoors, and I'm Not much of a Fan of People Pics... I'd Much Rather do Critters and Such... BUT... I was Researching my Family at a Local Cemeter...	Jozie	3	549	Jun 25, 2015 by Iamhere
	Gracious...It's the old me!! (Preview) Wednesday Night Turning Point AFG is my home group and recently I invited an AA member who was being done in by a "qualifier" son. He came back last evening some what loosened up emotionally by the first meeting and God was I not face to face with my old ego and behavior? He ranted and did hi...	Jerry F	4	533	Jun 25, 2015 by Iamhere
	Sad...very sad...and angry and concerned (Preview) For my native brothers and sisters and wishing I was with them up on the Mountain as they stand for our native culture in solidarity while the police and state arrest the young and old who protect our Cultural Spiritual sites. Mauna Kea the sacred mountain considered by so many the center of spiritu...	Jerry F	11	816	Jun 25, 2015 by Skorpi
	Did I get the job? (Preview) Tomorrow marks one month since I started here. I'm counting that as my recovery anniversary. May 24th, 2015. Boy, that's not very long. Kinda scary that I've only been at this one month. Kinda puts things in perspective. (too much [sic] perspective). Deep Breath. Back to work. (God grant me...	almostThere	11	605	Jun 25, 2015 by Saucy
	I live with a roomate (Preview) I have been reading a lot on the board and its helping me focus on me only. I feel alone a lot of times as my alcoholic BF is not present. He is either working, sleeping or drunk on his day off. He works 6 days a week night shift and on the one day off he has he is drunk out of his mind. He will start drinking at 6 am wh...	joker	3	583	Jun 25, 2015 by Iamhere
	Re-discovering Lost Passions (Preview) As I have progressed in my recovery one of the things that I began to lament was how many of the things I enjoyed doing, or people I enjoyed seeing, I left behind as my AW's disease spiraled out of control. I used to play golf every weekend, and discovered I had played maybe 2-3 rounds total in the past 3 yea...	Dave2554	5	579	Jun 25, 2015 by Jozie
	C2C reading 6-25 (Preview) C2C reading for today, June 25 speaks about Step Six--. Becoming entirely ready to have HP remove our defects of character. The reading defines the defects of characters as roadblocks that keep us stranded-- not able to freely travel life's magnificent Boulevard. The reading and goes on to d...	hotrod	2	459	Jun 25, 2015 by Iamhere
	Who invented this term and where can I find them? ( 1 2 ) (Preview) "Functional Alcoholic" Not having the best day, but still better than it used to be because I have al-anon. Just feel a quick need to vent about this term. It's a veil. Rose colored glasses. A facade. A crutch. A license to steal. A license to abuse. A finger that points at everyone else. ...	almostThere	61	1749	Jun 25, 2015 by almostThere
	Hope for Today 6-24 ...encouraging and understanding the A (Preview) Today's HfT addresses an important concept found in Tradition 5: "Each Al-Anon Group has but one purpose: to help families of Alcoholics. We do this by practicing the 12 Steps ourselves, by encouraging and understanding our alcoholic relatives,..." The contributor acknowledges the...	Enigmatic	3	579	Jun 24, 2015 by hotrod
	Maybe he's right and it's not the booze. Maybe he's just an a**hole! (Preview) i'm of an age where I have gotten used to sleeping with a small fan clipped on my headboard blowing on my head. I get terrible night sweats and hot flashes and without my little fan I wake up several times a night. So, since my ah stopped drinking he has had trouble sleeping. When I have trouble sleeping bec...	JukuVee	7	772	Jun 24, 2015 by Iamhere
	Father's Day is hard (Preview) This is my first time here and my first time writing. Father's day was a rough day for me this year. I'm 30 years old, happily married, and far enough away from my hometown. My father is an alcoholic and a drug addict. My mom divorced my father when I was 4 and is married now. My father never did anything for...	dandelion2007	3	544	Jun 24, 2015 by KennyFenderjazz
	And now he steals my sadness! (Preview) My AH and I had to put our 8yr old Bullmastiff to sleep on Wednesday, he was battling a horrible infection that left him unable to walk and in a lot of pain. Anyone who has lost a pet knows how sad it is, they are like family members. In our house there is a huge void now (Literally HUGE, he was 140lbs) I am miss...	CoopsMom	11	631	Jun 24, 2015 by Mike B
	I broke my bus (Preview) well, not completely broke but I bent it - from childhood, my first instinct is to hide it, don't talk about it, don't say anything and maybe it will blow over and no one will notice and I won't get in trouble for it. Of COURSE I didn't play it that way, I'm an adult now! I sent a text to my boss saying what had ha...	likemyheart	3	463	Jun 24, 2015 by Jozie
	C2C 6-24 (Preview) C2C reading for today stress the importance of changing our attitudes and viewing ourselves and our actions in a positive light It points out that as a result of living with the disease of alcoholism we become disappointed by our inability to fix the situation and our self esteem and self worth suff...	hotrod	3	379	Jun 24, 2015 by Skorpi
	Works When I Work it :) (Preview) Funny How things Have Changed :) When I Got to this Program I Was a Broken Mess of Emotions, I Assumed EVERYTHING and Knew Nothing... I Panicked at the Sight of On Coming Doom, I took Everything EVERYONE (Even those I Didn't Know) Personal.. And then Of Course Thru My Own Sick Piece of Panic to it and Mad...	Jozie	5	427	Jun 24, 2015 by Jozie
	friendships (Preview) Winter came early here and I've just concluded a lovely lovely six weeks with my mother. We were grateful to have our time together, us and her grandchildren. It was different this time. Mum is turning 60, she's been a smoker for far too many years and had a hard life thanks to the family disease which bon...	a4l	2	327	Jun 24, 2015 by Iamhere
	Still at Drug and Alcohol studies and enjoying the challenges.... (Preview) Just stopping in to say Hello, Hope you all doing good and taking those small steps to progress and growing along the way. I know I am Lots of challenges, in my 4th Mod, 8 more to go, passed my Ethics exam ....boy theres a lot to this counseling. Stay well and One Day At A Time... Hugs, Bettina Hey Jerry, A...	Beatrice	5	386	Jun 24, 2015 by Iamhere
	It's nice to get... (Preview) this (((((()))))) when I feel like this )))))) (((((( What a great place. Time to make a gratitude and assets list. Great weather My Kids My Kids My Kids My Kids My Job Good Father's Day New Shoes Most bills paid Son's got a gig on my birthday Daughter home safe from FireFly Festival Gas Tank Half Fu...	almostThere	3	368	Jun 24, 2015 by Beatrice
	Down to brass tacks (Preview) Struggling lately. Back to the beginning. Newbies (like me), it all starts with the Serenity Prayer. I find I'm having to say it out loud or under my breath repeatedly, and at times in a constant loop. The main thing it does, especially when repeated out loud, is to physically provide an audible sti...	almostThere	6	533	Jun 23, 2015 by el-cee
	Haven't been online in ages but....(long post) (Preview) It's been quite some time since I have been on. I thought I was doing so well in my recovery, so we'll I don't need to go to meetings or practice daily meditations, denial at its finest I guess..... Briefly, my father is a functioning alcoholic, my brother is what I consider a typical alcoholic; no job,...	mynewlife	4	427	Jun 23, 2015 by Iamhere
	Leaving on a jet plane .. (Preview) Don't know when I'll be back again .. LOL .. I wish. I know when I will be back. The kids are staying with my mom for 5 weeks total. I will be there for a week. I'm very nervous because she's very needy and I worry about the kids. Sooo grateful for program as well as a warped sense of humor. It will be a good...	SerenityRUS	8	441	Jun 23, 2015 by Iamhere
	When you listen... (Preview) God speaks. A while back I got a book, a meditational reader with that title from someone else in program. It was a great read and I passed it on to someone else in program. I wish I had another copy now. When I first got it the title messed with my thinking a bit, like maybe it was backwards or such...&q...	Jerry F	6	614	Jun 23, 2015 by Jerry F
	Hope for Today June 23 (Preview) Good morning Everyone- Today's reading is about our ability to trust our intuition in various situations, and the many ways we are able to work the 12th step as we try to carry the message to others. The reading describes a scene where the writer spontaneously decided to hug someone she had been work...	yanksfan51	4	476	Jun 23, 2015 by Mark17
	Overcoming Anger (Preview) First, I'd like to say what an inspiration everyone has been to me on here. Although I haven't posted myself, I've spent much time reading along with many of your stories and find much encouragement in all of your words. With that being said, I have to admit that in my own situation, I still have a lot of...	WorkingOnMe	4	451	Jun 23, 2015 by Mark17
	I suck at mothering a teenager. (Preview) Daughter's father has been attempting to engage me in "talking" lately. I never know exactly what he means by this because we don't communicate well and the "talking" always ends with either he expressing bizarre and kind of offensive concerns (like, recently, "shou...	missmeliss	9	550	Jun 23, 2015 by nannyg
	Happiness is a Choice... (Preview) .... so choose happiness today MIP friends.x	el-cee	6	1039	Jun 22, 2015 by LinSC
	Can you see your own shortcomings? (Preview) The disease of alcoholism is a family disease. That means the whole family have symptoms. When we focus solely on the alcoholic we are failing to see ourselves, there's nothing we can do about the drinker, only ourselves. You could spend your whole life complaining about the same boring stuff almost...	el-cee	18	863	Jun 22, 2015 by Jen61
	At wits end.....TaT (Preview) Hi all, For he last few weeks I have been struggling dealing with one of my AS, I just talked to the counselor at the recovery home he is in and it looks lie there may be some major issues far beyond what I was worried about. He needs proper diagnosis and it looks like hes either borderline, narcissistic or m...	nannyg	6	488	Jun 22, 2015 by Jerry F
	The upwards spiral (Preview) 2 years ago, when I was just new here, I wrote a post about how I was isolated and socially kind of phobic. I had an on-line friend (I used to play online computer games a lot) from interstate who was going to coming near me on his way to a wedding and had decided to come and meet me (with his wife). And I was so ne...	missmeliss	3	436	Jun 22, 2015 by Iamhere
	The Natives are Restless.... (Preview) At times, I am 'stuck' in a moment of doing the next right thing. There are situations that 'normal folks' face that the logical response is accurate and appropriate. However, my experience is that when we are dealing with this disease, the 'normal' can become a catalyst for chaos. Long story short...	Iamhere	2	437	Jun 22, 2015 by Iamhere
	Son says I have to apologize for being a terrible mother to him (Preview) I actually felt I was a good mother. I was a stay at home mom who "lived" for her 4 children (spaced 5 years apart so i ciuld give each "his" time in his early years. While I was by no means perfect, I spent my years caring for them, reading to them, making art projects with them, taking...	lgnutah	14	720	Jun 22, 2015 by missmeliss
	totally new - 12 years sober, trying to get a drunk friend into aa (Preview) i really don't know what to do. my friend won't try aa. she has all sorts of denialist reasons why not to go. i recently lost a family member (a close one) to alcoholism. i feel as if i have a lot of regrets about that which i know is irrational. but i want to try with this friend, who has kids etc. many sober fr...	ruthstoops	14	544	Jun 22, 2015 by Joe S
	I'm new--Are there online sponsors (Preview) Last week I went to my first Al-Anon meeting. It is a very small group with only 4 members all of them so much younger than me. I just think it would help if I had a sponsor that I might be able to relate better with. Maybe it wasn't just their age or maybe it was just me. I got the feeling they were a close group an...	catlover26	5	510	Jun 22, 2015 by maryjane
	Guilt from my past enabling behavior (Preview) I stopped enabling my adult son (30) almost a year ago - it was mainly financial support - occasional rent checks, occasional car insurance, paying the occasional traffic tickets, occasional groceries, occasional utility bills, etc., etc., etc. - of course, I had been doing it with all good intent...	texas yankee	9	519	Jun 22, 2015 by maryjane
	newbie who needs help (Preview) We have just recently found out that our 40 year old son has a "drinking problem." He was raised in a very religious home with absolutely no history of even drinking alcohol, so this was pretty shocking to us and we don't have a clue how to help him. He has lived in another state for a number of...	sweetie	8	572	Jun 22, 2015 by Mark17
	This ones tough (Preview) i never learned how to love myself,and just how do you open up to. A freind never had I.need all esh I can get here get me back on track plz.....hugs	lookingup	7	656	Jun 22, 2015 by missmeliss
	Scary times here. (Preview) I haven't been on in awhile, but I had posted about my AH who was physically abusive in the past, but not so much anymore, and had even curbed his drinking to a tolerable amount on most occasions, but that the abuse even while sober was still enough to make me want to leave. Well, it really hit the fan last w...	PennyJenny010115	2	555	Jun 22, 2015 by Mark17
	Father's Day (Preview) My father died over 30 years ago, due to lack of self care after a heart attack. I was in my late 20's. So he has missed out on my son growing up, having a daughter of his own, my getting my education which I had had to stop after surgery, and I never got to relate to him as a mature adult. He had some major fl...	Lyne	6	484	Jun 22, 2015 by Mark17
	C2C 6-21 (Preview) Happy first day of summer. Today's reading in the C2C speaks about the power of meditation. The reading breaks down the definition of meditation into an easy to understand form as It defines meditation as ability to think contemplatively and that to contemplate simply means to " view tho...	hotrod	4	438	Jun 22, 2015 by Mark17
	New to Alanon (Preview) I've been in an alcoholic/drug abuse relationship with my husband for over 20 yrs. He is now 2 years sober but the pain and misery is still there. I thought for sure if he stopped doing drugs and alcohol all of problems would go away. I was wrong. It's seems worse now then it was when he was drinking. Befo...	00islandgirl00	9	593	Jun 22, 2015 by Mark17
	Courage to Change 6/16 C2C (Preview) Today's reading discusses detaching with love and allowing our A(s) to hit their own bottom by experiencing natural consequences for their choices and actions. It also discusses that with the best of intentions, we have often interrupted their success too. Only through working the program, an...	Iamhere	9	570	Jun 22, 2015 by Mark17
	Courage to Change 6/17 C2C (Preview) Today's reading reminds us that we are seeking peace through progress, not perfection. Al-Anon helps many of us to cope with crises that we simply could not have managed on our own. The program teaches us to lean on a Power greather than ourselves and discover that we can live and even grow through the...	Iamhere	5	470	Jun 22, 2015 by Iamhere
	C2C 6-22 (Preview) The C2C reading for June 22 speaks about what it was like when we first entered the rooms and how our attitudes have changed since. It points out that many of us unknowingly gave our power away by our attitudes and belief systems. We did this by blaming others for our situation and feelings and...	hotrod	3	379	Jun 22, 2015 by Iamhere
	Per Request from My Last Kayak Trip :) (Preview)	Jozie	12	729	Jun 22, 2015 by Jozie
	Beautiful Day.... (Preview) I am well rested, had my breakfast, hugged my son ... I am going to spend this beautiful day doing some chores and some play Praying for all of you on this beautiful day	Truth	8	400	Jun 21, 2015 by Truth
	Need prayer and support (Preview) Hello everyone, I need advice on a situation with my ds and XAH. My ds will have 2 more years of high school to finish, after being homeschooled for the past 16 years. I have been working full time and that means my XAH has had to step up and handle a lot more of ds' schedule. For now, things are tolerable b...	andromeda	8	515	Jun 21, 2015 by Jill
	C2C 6-20 (Preview) The C2C reading for June 20 speaks about living with the disease of alcoholism and how we unconsciously develop negative coping tools to protect ourselves from the insanity of the disease. The reading suggests that we often" react :out of fear -- go silent, and keep quiet when confronted ins...	hotrod	5	346	Jun 20, 2015 by Truth
	I've done it now (Preview) No matter what I do or how hard I work the steps I find myself after a period of time losing it. Today my active qualifier went out to pick up some tea and powerade for me and to stop by Sears for a sparkplug. He was gone for three hours and my thoughts were racing. I tried calling him and he ignored calls, no res...	Tampa	12	691	Jun 20, 2015 by Jerry F
	Good days and bad days (Preview) I'm haveing good days when I'm with healthy ppl but wen I'm alone which I live alone I get depressed my freind told me I'd better be careful or I'd fall into another bad relationship,prolly true.im doing good today so all I can do is take one day at a time ,even baby steps........thanks for listening hugs...	lookingup	8	590	Jun 20, 2015 by Jerry F
	Boundaries (Preview) I am trying to figure out how to discuss this with my A. We have some boundaries in place that we both agreed on. One is that if he knows he will not be home within 20 minutes after work, AA whatever it is he is doing he will call and I too do the same. As of the past couple of weeks, suddenly he no longer calls and w...	Flower49	11	685	Jun 20, 2015 by Iamhere
	johnny cash (Preview) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vt1Pwfnh5pc	missmeliss	3	464	Jun 20, 2015 by almostThere
	I had no idea!! (Preview) Something dawned on me just now and I googled it ... What part does alcohol consumption play in increasing estrogen in a drinker? I noticed that when AH is beside himself he acts like someone who is not only out of control with emotions but like someone whose hormones are raging as well. I discovered...	Debb	18	759	Jun 20, 2015 by Iamhere
	C2C reading 6-19 (Preview) C2C reading for today speaks about taking everything that happens personally and that by doing this I remain a victim and blame others for my discomfort. Accepting life on life's terms is the key . The reading emphasizes the fact that things will not always go our way and that learning how to acc...	hotrod	9	482	Jun 20, 2015 by Mark17
	Awareness won't do it for me! (Preview) I seem to have to learn this lesson over and over and over and over and over. Knowing the pitfalls, knowing the outcomes and knowing the wrong course of action through tried and tested experience just doesn't make bad decisions work any better! For example, for various reasons I am 2 weeks into an 8 week...	missmeliss	9	853	Jun 20, 2015 by Mark17
	Lurked for a bit and then took the plunge. (Preview) Seventeen years ago I was attending family week at my then newly wedded husband's rehab facility after he was arrested for dealing drugs. I met a woman in her early forties, whose husband had held a high profile job in their small town before he made headlines for a drunk driving accident. She said it wa...	KrissySmith	5	578	Jun 20, 2015 by Mark17
	Relearn my lessons (Preview) I guess i needed a reality check. I stated how i felt in an email to ex in just a basic way. Stated i needed more time to move out i was trying to do too much and having a hard time emotionally. I only said "i was hurt very deeply by someone i thought i knew and had trusted" He spins it back that i ha...	Mirandac	12	637	Jun 20, 2015 by Mirandac
	My Experience Working Step 1 (Preview) I am going to share some of what I wrote when in the process of working the the first ten steps and thought I would start at the beginning, with Step 1:We admitted we were powerless over the Alcoholic that our lives had become unmanageable.I began Step One in May of last year, it was a huge relief admitting...	Debb	4	2378	Jun 20, 2015 by Mark17
	C2C - Detachment With Love...Why? (Preview) Today's C2C is one that resonated deeply within my mind and heart early on in my AlAnon journey; it is one of the key texts that allowed me to see the 'Why' and 'How' of Detachment with love. AlAnon introduced me to the concept of allowing the A to face the consequences of their actions; the concept that th...	Enigmatic	11	701	Jun 20, 2015 by Jock
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.