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admitting some inside stuff
(Preview)
nope sorry,no sex or violence...
I don't mention that everytime I hear a love song, when I am driving to town, my A
husband is in my heart. Or that I sometimes have to still let it out and cry about
the loss.
I don't mention I am so concerned about him, so little, so sick, so miserable. I wonder
...
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debilyn
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8
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500
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To admit
(Preview)
Last night was another hurtful experience, for someone not living this life, they would just say "whatever" My A always has time for everyone, mostly his friends and of course his drinking. We have stuff that needs to be done at our house, but it is always on hold. I know that I will end up ge...
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marmare
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5
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784
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HI dori
(Preview)
Dori I know, for me, sometimes I did not know how I really felt, until
I came and vented right here.
We are not robots who can control everything that comes out of us. I have written
posts and emails that did not come out right at all.
I see it as a positive when i see someone goof or say something...
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debilyn
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6
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466
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the graditude alphabet
(Preview)
Hi all, s.o. gave me this idea. Instead of spending hrs. on the pity pot, which I do too often, I say my graditude alphabet. Goes like this:
a for alanon, b for book (managed against all odds and with the help of good friend to get book off to publisher on time), c for church (be...
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toto12
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2
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692
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cbd where are you?
(Preview)
cbd,
I have been checking the chat room and message board and haven't seen you in awhile. I heard you were taking care of your mother. Hope that is going well. I just wanted to say Hi and that I miss you if you get a chance reply or send me private message, let me know how you are doing. I pray for you and your d...
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ItsmeTC
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2
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600
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A light at the end of the tunnel...
(Preview)
About a month ago, my A stopped drinking for about 4 days (which isnt unusual after a binge). I realized how much happier in life I was when he wasnt drinking. I talked to him about it and how it wasnt only taking over his life but mine and our son's as well. Oh, and we have another baby on the way...
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kimmie
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9
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960
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Giving in???
(Preview)
I've worked hard this past year, trying to build my own business (separate from my A). He's decided now he's not happy with his current job, and wants me to go back into business with him (we worked together for 15 years) and it was not a 50/50 relationship. I felt like his slave. We ma...
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Belongtome
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8
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615
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How stupid can i get
(Preview)
I wrote a post about my fiance telling me about his apartment and today I found out that he has had it for a couple of weeks and has slowly been putting stuff into. He says he stopped out of guilt towards me but his sponser told him to wait until I go to work then move his stuff out. And here...
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harleygirl555
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5
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784
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tears
(Preview)
Hi all
Thank you so much for your kindness and your acceptance.I was amazed again how this disease sneeks up on you and you are on the floor before you know what hits you.I have made choices in my life after growing up in achcholism and drug addiction and abuse being taken away from parents at the...
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dori
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5
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732
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Abandonment issues
(Preview)
Boy am I glad I have a place to go today. Thanks to anyone out there, everyone. I hope your day is going well.
I've been in a new relationship, for 3 months. It has been going mostly well, although a little fast. I'm 44 years old and have had my problems. Yesterday was a total meltdown for me in regards to fe...
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mo_a
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6
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615
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Quote for Today
(Preview)
"Today, I will do three nice things for myself."
WOW! I ran across this in one of my readings and this was the closing sentence. Wish I could remember which book. But think about it, after living w/alcoholism, raising families, being spouses---do we really do THREE nice...
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wallsal55
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3
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435
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ENOUGH IS ENOUGH
(Preview)
Today is the first day of the rest of my life. My ex-a (husband of 12 years who i divorced 3 years ago after he left for another women) , who I have been having an on off relationship with for past 7 months and supporting him in his sobriety, told me last night that whilst he was at the AA conventi...
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melanieL
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8
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530
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Looking for an online sponser
(Preview)
Hi everone, I'm new to alanon and am looking for a online sponser. I understand that some may feel that a face to face sponser is better, but I'm not able to do that. So if anyone is interested, or has any advice, I'd reallyreally appreciate the help. Thanks so much.
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truenames
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2
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643
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I'm new here...and have a question...
(Preview)
I've been married for 20 yrs. to a man who secretly drinks. I first noticed this about 15 yrs. ago when I'd find an occasional beer bottle some place strange. Now it's those little vodka bottles. Just found 2 more this morning. What I don't understand is: how can it be that I've never seen him drunk? His fa...
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Briarpatch
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2
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587
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I need advice
(Preview)
Today it was again. About 2 years ago my husband began drinking too much. Had always drank socially, but not to the extent of now. When it began it was "because his back hurt so much". He did break his back about 15 years ago. Then I was just trying to be understanding.&n...
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nmartin
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8
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515
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thinking outloud
(Preview)
I was thinking the other day, I wonder if there are A's out there that
are good people even if they use?
I would think we all come here becuz we love an A who's disease is driving us
crazy.
Guess in a way it is no surprise. It is like doing certain drugs make you act a certain way.
Alcohol makes t...
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debilyn
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4
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705
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Thank You
(Preview)
I only found this site a few days ago, but have been going to it at least twice daily since. The information I've gotten from reading all the postings has been really helpful - sometime almost a lifesaver. You feel like you are all alone in the fight and it helps to know that somebody else has...
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nmartin
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3
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596
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megan- grief
(Preview)
Hey,
It is amazing how our God works at times.I just wrote my post of goodby and I still mean it for now.I Read one most post and it was your reponse to someone who is seperating from her a in her life.
I read your things you need and my heart began to soften and began to cry than sob,The ex a i left 3 years ago...
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dori
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2
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600
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TO DORI
(Preview)
Thank you.......your post to "dating a recoverying alcoholic" brightened my day today, came on feel fed up and down and you made me really laugh. By the way totally agree with you.
Mel
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melanieL
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6
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582
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Enabling: Paying for booze/consequences
(Preview)
My A husband just entered in-patient rehab and we're hoping he can get the help he needs to begin to achieve sobriety. But I'm also now realizing how much in denial I was about enabling his addiction. He had complete control of finances and they're in a mess! He made some really poor decisions that I igno...
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Rocky38
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2
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467
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jo and who ever else good bye
(Preview)
Hey,
She asked what to do with just started dateing a a and I said i would tell any one run and not get involved .I know that is my opion but she didnt say she was in love with him or married to him she said she just started seeing for about a week so that was just my opion of it cause as you know it is alot of...
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dori
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2
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702
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Fear
(Preview)
Hi Friends,
Someone in the chat room mentioned page 305 from the Courage to Change book. It's a good reading about fear and how our reactions to it can sometimes hurt us more than help. I encourage everyone to read it.
One of my favorite slogans is "don't just do something, stan...
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bob6502
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4
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651
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why am I feeling like the bad guy?
(Preview)
My husband with whom I am separated from (almost 4 weeks now) is calling and telling me all the things he is doing since he has cut back from the drinking, partying, etc. (he is in counseling and I believe went to an AA meeting). I try to encourage him but I do not want him to think he can just pop back in, all fi...
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Becka
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6
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628
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goodbye
(Preview)
Hey guys
I didnt want you all to think I fell off the planet but right now with the ways things are in my lfie faceing some strong truths and moveing on.I am seting boundaries that I am not use to seting and one is not hanging where I fill misunderstood and attacked .
For now it is not...
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dori
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1
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644
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health/brain update
(Preview)
I got home from doc and the best MRI scanner in the area showed no new strokes and that my arteries in my neck and brain are ok. My headaches are undercontrol and it is time to get on with my life! Thanks for all your support these last two frustratating and scarey weeks, you all showed true fri...
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jrtjosey
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9
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472
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In Response to No Sympathy for A's...
(Preview)
My daughter is currently in an extensive rehabilitation program and as you I always believed that alcoholism was a choice and all it took was will-power and a firm desire to stop. Along with the addict recognizing the first step and sincerely believing it with all their heart, mind, and soul.&...
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sanddie
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1
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569
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New to Al-anon
(Preview)
My husband was clean for 6 years and the last 2 years he has been drinking again. I have never been to an al-anon meeting before. While he was clean he kept telling me I should go and I denied that I needed it and now with everything going on I want to know more. We have two children ages 4 a...
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kcovell1
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4
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443
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New to this
(Preview)
I am new to this.........If I were to start writing how I feel there would be no end. Ihave been married 30 years and my husband is an addict/alcoholic. This past week he was on vacation and it has been pure hell. Tried to run out in front of a car but he got me. I guess I am just looking for others who are g...
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CKH46
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4
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471
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Just found out father-in-law has Parkinson's
(Preview)
Dear All,
Yesterday my father-in-law went to doctor and found out something I think most of us have suspected for a while to be honest- he has Parkinson's disease. Tomorrow is his 81st birthday. He has had shaky hands for a couple of years now. This is kind blowing my mind r...
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DanaAngel
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4
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416
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Reality
(Preview)
Today I release old idealized versions of the past in exchange for a sturdy stance on firm ground.
One way I survived my childhood was to create an idealized version of it. ..... Long out of my family home I may still recreate versions of this idealized famil...
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wallsal55
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0
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376
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Group Campout Head Count
(Preview)
Hiya everyone,
Just trying to get an idea of who is coming to the campout this coming weekend. I am so looking forward to it. I have heard that many are interested in coming which is a real positive. It would be so nice to try and make this something we can put together in all areas of t...
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AlaMom
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1
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389
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walking on the highway
(Preview)
After work I went to the store to get my prescription filled for an ear infection.
On my way to the store I realized I was going to the wrong store and went on the highway.
There, walking on the side of the road with a backpack and a hat and drenched in sweat (it was 94) was my alcoholic husband who I left 9 w...
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megan
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7
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620
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i am new to the boards !!!
(Preview)
hello all, i am new to this board and i just wanted to say hi!! ive been a member of alanon for about 5 or so years..... its a great program!!!!! i have to admit i havent been to a meeting in a long while but what i have learned has stuck with me !!! and i use it on a daily basis!!!
i hope to be chatting with you s...
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serenity71
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2
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373
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For Lildee or anybody who knows
(Preview)
Hello everyone hope you are all well
I was reading a reply that lildee did to a previous post. She mentioned that you could get an online sponsor and work the steps that way. If so, does anyone have suggestions on how to go about it?
Also, thanks for the link to Hazeldon. An...
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browneyes
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2
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419
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new
(Preview)
I am new to this. My partner of 9 years has checked himself into alcohol rehab. He we in recovery when we first met. Then about 2 years ago he started drinking again. The past 6 months were really bad. I went to family group at the place he is at. The counselor there told me about al anon....
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kountrygal1996
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3
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443
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Monday the 11th
(Preview)
Good Morning,
I have to say knowing that you are here helps me in an odd way. Things have settled down, but I know that this is just the controled drinking state that my A is in.
There is hardly any talking of the subject anymore, I did share with my mother in-law who seems to think that if I divorc...
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marmare
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2
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526
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|
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BUS MTG AGENDA - JULY 13, 2005
(Preview)
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shimo
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0
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378
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NEED CHAIR - TUES A.M. MEETING
(Preview)
I regret that I am unable to chair the meeting for Tuesday morning due to circumstances beyond my control. Hoping once again that someone will step up and I thank you in advance.
Shimo (Jeri)
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shimo
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0
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407
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Can't let go of the anger and resentment
(Preview)
Today my husband has obviously taken pills, but instead of arguing with him about it...I told him to go to bed and sleep it off. Meanwhile, I am up and angry that he cannot leave the drugs alone. I am angry that I have to take care of everything while he sleeps. He does not even care that...
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Powerless
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4
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746
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FEELING REALLY DOWN AGAIN
(Preview)
Well my ex-A got back from Canada and the AA world convention on Friday and I have not had any peace since. He was absolutely full of it. But still made me feel bad. He came over on the Friday to see the kids, but spent the whole time talking to me about how wonderful it was , and how there w...
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melanieL
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2
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552
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I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND
(Preview)
Can someone please help me to understand!!! My fiance told me today that his sponser thinks it is best if he moves out and leaves his family-and he already has an apartment next to his sponsers house. My A tells me that he loves me but has no room in his life for us anymore. I am so confus...
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harleygirl555
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3
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642
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|
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My first time here...
(Preview)
I am so glad that I found this place. I've been to several meetings and really enjoy the support and friendship.
SO and I have been together for 5yrs. He is an alcoholic and I am the enabler. I think I probably could have written the book on enabling. Two weeks ago, something in me just snapped. He'd be...
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SexySadie
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3
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615
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|
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Holly are you around??
(Preview)
Was just thinking about you and wondering how you are?? Last I remember you
had shown some good progress.
I miss seeing you on here!!
love,debilyn
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debilyn
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0
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355
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feeling hurt and confused
(Preview)
Hi, I am brand new at this; I will try not to drag on.
I told my husband of only 2 ½ years to leave 3 weeks ago. I guess I basically threw him out. The staying out all night partying with his so called friends, the drinking and drug use (which I found out quite accidentally and then kept finding late...
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Becka
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8
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697
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Alcoholic Brother coming to visit
(Preview)
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pepodwyer
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4
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562
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NEW AND NEED HELP
(Preview)
My fiance has finally been sober for 5 months and I am so glad yet at the same time I have feelings of loneliness and fear. He is sober yet he still lies about supid things. I do my best to support him and his meetings because I know if he doesn't go he will relapse and lately he has been blowing th...
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harleygirl555
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6
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653
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help!
(Preview)
I am not sure what the topic of this post is. I am in a difficult situation right now. I am in Ahmenabad, India, teaching for 45 days. There are no meetings here - not even open AA, which always does in a pinch.
Most of the time I am fine, but lately I have been ill (its India, imagine). My thoughts and feelin...
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jamesthomas
|
11
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698
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Lessons
(Preview)
Lessons ............ A 91-year-old woman died after living a very long dignified life. When she met God, she asked Him something that had really bothered her for a very long time. "If Man was created in God's image, and if all men are created equal, why do people treat each other so...
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kerry5
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3
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446
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Emotions Anonymous link
(Preview)
As a service to those who access this board I am putting up the link to Emotions Anonymous
www.emotionsanonymous.org/
I am looking into seeing if this program fits me also (and I think it might). My other half has had the handbook for a couple of years and I just started reading it and just rec...
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DanaAngel
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3
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532
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Impartial feedback
(Preview)
Here's a copy of a letter I sent my wife the day after dropping our son off at camp. I have been in recovery after checking myself into a 90 day rehab 2 years ago. She got an attorney about a year ago to 'protect herself and the kids financially.' As far as I'm concerned our financial problems a...
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UncleLou
|
7
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605
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Crisis
(Preview)
hey everyone, hope all is well
needless to say all is not well with me. i have been struggling lately as some of you know. well things are not going well at home and i am trying to decide what is really the "right " thing to do. in short, here is the immediate problem (although not the o...
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browneyes
|
11
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1119
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no more excusses
(Preview)
well, I don't even know were to begin. I haven't been in here for about a month now and it's really starten to show in how I'm acting. The only place I can really come here is while I'm at work. Lately it's been real busy. I haven't made it to f2f meetings in about a month also. ...
First couple...
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dis5
|
5
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639
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New here and need some ESH
(Preview)
Good morning everyone,I really need some ESH on a problem,first tho some about me..
I have been married to same A for 42 years,he is presently in AA and sober now for 1 year,AGAIN.He has been to treatment 4 times since 1973,had 8 years sobriety once,then 3-4 years and now 1 year......ongoing thing it...
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Shetaz
|
8
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767
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Excuited
(Preview)
I haven't posted for a while and that is probably because not much has changed with my situation. What has changed is that I am working my program very well I think and I am feeling just great about ME!!! I have a great support group whom I am greatful to both Alanon and AA.
At this point I rea...
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jj
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5
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1515
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Meeting
(Preview)
Hello, all. I attended an Al-anon meeting last night. First one I've been to in about 6 months. My "A" attended the AA meeting a received his 6 year token. Those little tokens mean so, very much. I never thought he would ever stop drinking. It was nice to see my fellow "A...
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tk47834
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3
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432
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I dont understand People
(Preview)
I dont understand alot of things about the way people act. ANd i know that people are sick and in thier own stuff. But so am i and i am not mean, even when i didnt have recovery i still never understood. I am a very shy person extremely shy. But not shy to say whats on my mind and when im in person i talk to p...
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kerry5
|
5
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819
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detatching
(Preview)
I wonder whether anyone has any tips on detatching. I have now come to realise that there is absolutely no chance of a reconciliation with my ex-a and myself. He has told me that he loves me , but will always cheat on me with other women, it is something he cannot help and I deserve better.&nb...
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melanieL
|
7
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517
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Off My Pity Pot
(Preview)
I have spent a fair amount of time reflecting on my most recent post. I discussed with my sponsor and members of my group how I have been feeling. What it all boiled down to was I was doing a fair amount of the poor me's. I wanted people to feel sorry for me for whatever reason. Mos...
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AlaMom
|
3
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580
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hello
(Preview)
Hi,
My name is cheri. I am an alcoholic and have been sober 4 years. My husband has been sober 15 years. Recently I discovered some things about my husband that really disturb me, and my sponsor told me to start going to alanon, that I needed to learn what was mine and what wasn't. I have been walking on eg...
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cheri
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2
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390
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new to board
(Preview)
I am new to this board and am feeling very overwhelmed and hope someone can help. My mother and I have not spoken in about 18 months due to her alcoholism. I have been covering for her my whole life and finally had enough. I told her i would always be there for her but she needed to stop dr...
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laura
|
11
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582
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