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What do you need?
(Preview)
This question is possibly the most dangerous ever asked by AH and my counselor. The question I can't let myself think about too long....yet it nags at the surface whether I want it to or not. What I need is simple, and yet so profound and far away from here. I need to see red flags faster. I need to use my voi...
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LedfootJenny
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6
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569
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any successful stories after separating from your loved one
(Preview)
Hello! I don't know if anybody posted this before... But I was wondering if you guys know anybody or has been through separation with your loved one without communication that was successful in the end. What made you be strong and what steps did you take? Thank you!
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needguidance
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9
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691
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C2C reading 7-1
(Preview)
The C2C reading for July 1 is extremely important. It points out that when we enter the rooms of Al-Anon, we have lost much of our self-esteem and feel full of self-pity and resentment. Living with the disease of alcoholism we have been harshly criticized by others,lost our perspective on the situat...
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hotrod
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2
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379
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I didn't handle myself too well.
(Preview)
I have had a rough couple of days back with my AH and his weekly benders. We are also in the middle of remodeling our home, so that adds a new dimension of stress. I got home from working all day and an hour at the gym and baking in the 102 degree weather outside, to find that the bender continues. AH is slur...
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Bethany66
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5
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560
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HP making me nervous...
(Preview)
and I had to ask "There's gotta be something You're needing in return". I'm silent and listening and will report what I'm directed to do. I was outside getting messy and trying no to make it catastrophic when my phone went off...my wife...I knew she was going to spend time with a sponsee...
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Jerry F
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3
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362
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Huge Slip!
(Preview)
What I'm about to share was not just a slip, it was a long slide crash and burn for me surrounded by some very sad circumstances. On Tuesday Dad who was 82 was killed in a car accident. He is in Heaven, I'm sure of that. I feel really good for him, I am sad for me. Dad and I did not agree on many things but some...
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glad
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6
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503
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So Angry
(Preview)
My dad has been alcohol-free for five weeks. He's also been in the hospital for that time. He attempted to do rehab last month and it seemed to uncover or exacerbate the neurological damage his drinking had caused. Five weeks ago, he walked into rehab under his own power. Now, he can't walk and if he's no...
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Mikhail
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8
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569
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I'm not a Codependent
(Preview)
I am not a codependent Since I know what's best for you! Without ME you might hurt yourself And then what would you do! No, I'm not codependent I just hate to see you hurt You say you have a headache? I'll call in "Sick" for you at work! I do enjoy the Theater And tennis is my game But not today, I...
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Beatrice
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13
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1003
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Looking for feedback from fellow members
(Preview)
Hello all! My wife and I recently found out her father was a phantom alcoholic from her mother. This all came about after he had fallen after driving to a store and needed to seek hospital treatment which uncovered a super high BAC. My MIL has been to al anon meetings but the advice she took from it was that...
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backcountry
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28
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988
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ODAT 6-29 We Share This in Common w/the Alcoholic...
(Preview)
...Self-deception. Today's page suggests that it is a natural tendency for all humans to omit our less flattering views and behaviors when presenting ourselves or our story to others. This is in evidence for some when we first arrive to AlAnon and share the unpleasantries that came at the hand of th...
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Enigmatic
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6
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440
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my dis-ease today
(Preview)
It seems this insidious disease is always with me. I wont ever be completely free from the effects of alcoholism, or will i? I dont know. The shortcomings that are strong in my life right now and act as a barrier to my serenity are impulsiveness and impatience. it seems i want what i want and i want it now an...
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el-cee
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5
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535
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C2C Reading 6-29
(Preview)
The C2C reading for June 29 speaks about the fact that Al-Anon is a spiritual program based on no particular religion, and no religious beliefs is required.. It points out that this freedom is extremely important because spirituality does not have to imply a particular philosophy or moral code; it...
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hotrod
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5
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440
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Hope For Today June 30
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Today's reading is about how futile it is to expect from the outside (with another person, job, home, etc) happiness we are looking for on the inside. Happiness comes from the work we do in the program and our relationship with our HP. At one time I remember struggling with a pa...
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yanksfan51
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3
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434
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taking it 30 minutes at a time
(Preview)
I drove down to my hometown yesterday because my best friends were having a birthday party. They invited me to stay at their home. And I helped them prepare for the party. We had a great time yesterday and today chatting and just joking around and laughing. An hour after the party started an ex friend sho...
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texasgal
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11
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529
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Made it :)
(Preview)
Here I am back in beautiful California and very glad to be! Saying it was an adventure is only part of it .. lol. I did discover a few tricks .. if you ever want to sit with someone especially a child just ask loudly on a crowded plane if they can locate the air sick bag we don't want a repeat of the last time we...
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SerenityRUS
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4
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754
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When Man Listens...God Speaks #2
(Preview)
I posted about what was happening here locally up on Mauna Kea. I'm sorry I felt strange doing that because of our traditions and then instead of erasing it I let it stand because we are family and today I can trust. I came back later and read your caring responses...always caring and I got weepy beca...
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Jerry F
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6
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649
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C2C 6-28
(Preview)
C2C Reading for today 6-28 speaks about keeping the focus on ourselves and not wasting our life worrying about another's behavior and actions. It points out that life is too short for us to allow our happiness to be dependent on another's actions.The time for us to seek recovery is NOW regardless...
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hotrod
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10
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520
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Dealing with the hate and disdain
(Preview)
My A and I have had a lot of problems, especially with our relationship in the last two years. Though sometimes we work at it, the disease does get in the way. But more than that, its the honesty of the relationship by and large that has taken the greatest hit. And I feel more than ever, if I dont do every...
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gabigail
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5
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897
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My widowed freind
(Preview)
I have a life long widowed freind that just lost a good husband of 14 yrs I've been staying with her for days off and on helping her then I told her I had to go home she got mad I thought cause she said well you want to go home right now I said jan I've got a home to and business to take care of so she finally hugged m...
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lookingup
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6
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498
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selling your contentment cheaply
(Preview)
Todays odat is a good one. It talks about how we can actually relish our own suffering, kind of enjoy it and we can blow up everything into huge proportions. We love been self pitiers and actively search out our martyrdom. Then we get serenity and contentment and we become freer. We need yo be good to ours...
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el-cee
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6
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549
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The Court that never ends
(Preview)
and I'm highly irritated .. enough to do something stupid which is why I'm sooooo glad I have alanon because if I didn't oi it would be bad. Turns out I heard from my atty and there is yet another delay to which I'm calling BS on .. thanks to alanon it reminded me to reach out to someone else and gain some pers...
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SerenityRUS
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4
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544
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Belated "Fathers Day" event - suggestions appreciated
(Preview)
Hi MiP friends, I need a bit of "encouragement" here ....and a few suggestions would not cause offense..lol Many here know my AH has been drinking since age 10, but is in recovery right now. He is a little over 2 1/2 months working a program and seems to be working it well, attending meeting...
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Doingmybest
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11
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487
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Toxic person
(Preview)
I was just reading a great blog on toxic people basically just get away and stay away. Do not take it personal. i try to figure out the whys of my ah behaviors in the last 15 years and i drive myself nuts. He has been dry for 30 years. We had what seemed like 15 good years Together then wham big changes in his a...
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Mirandac
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8
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552
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lifes magnificent boulevard
(Preview)
That's how courage to change described it today. Don't you think that is brilliant? Just had to highlight that today. I want to make sure my journey s good from here on in.x
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el-cee
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3
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399
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My Sober Guy
(Preview)
My husband has been sober for about two weeks now. This is the longest he's gone without drinking in at least 20 years. He's seeing a substance abuse counselor individually 1x per week and is attending group counseling three evenings per week. He has not started AA yet, but it's his recovery and I'm...
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Smiley99
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13
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726
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C2C 6-27
(Preview)
C2C reading for 6-27 talks about the importance of sponsoring and the fact that being a sponsor is as much a commitment to ourselves as it is to the person we have agreed to sponsor. The reading points out that often we are fearful when we are asked to sponsor another, however, we should remind our...
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hotrod
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1
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333
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Birthday deja vu
(Preview)
I've mentioned before that my A and I share a birthday and that every year has been a miserable disaster where we make plans and then instead he gets drunk and I cry and we stay home. So this year he has been announcing grand plans to have a special night together and I was getting excited about it. We chose a...
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missmeliss
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2
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417
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Who I can and cannot talk too
(Preview)
When my AH was first arrested for public intoxication - while with our three children - I spoke with his father. We talked about our mutual concernand support for AH. I felt that he was a good resource because his first wife - my AH's mother - was an alcoholic. A few days later when my AH spoke, I didnt kee...
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EarlyBird
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17
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769
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Ex MIL
(Preview)
Well ex MIL and i had words today. She said she was sorry about the divorce and understood she has been there Herself. i said yes i was doing fine and now i no longer had to deal with his alcoholism. It is not on me anymore! i did not stop what i was doing and went back in the house to scream after she left. S...
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Mirandac
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12
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921
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alcoholic is insane
(Preview)
I had to post this as the weekend is coming up and the alcoholic bf will be drinking tomorrow morning (works nights shifts) and I have to set up a plan to not listen to his insane talking and plans. I has plans in November to take out his RRSP and travel the world preaching the word of god and saving people. He...
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joker
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6
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476
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C2C 6-26
(Preview)
The C2C reading for 6-26 speaks about" forgiveness". It points out that when we first enter Al-Anon we are filled with bitterness towards many people in our lives. That after attending meetings for a while, keeping an open mind and listening to learn, we finally learn to keep the focus on o...
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hotrod
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5
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519
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Assets are hard
(Preview)
Assets are really hard to do. I was really surprised when I caught up with my old AA buddy recently and we were "talking program" and he told me he just doesn't do assets. After 30+ years, really? He finds it too uncomfortable. Gratitude is easy; assets are really hard. But I still do them; it'...
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missmeliss
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15
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782
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the power of change
(Preview)
It was just eight months ago when I started this program.First,I decided,in my despair,that I no longer wanted to live the way I was living.Living with an alcoholic had left me devastated.I cried myself to sleep,woke up in the night filled with panic, and thought of suicide.I picked up the phone and c...
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mjferg
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3
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336
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We're back......vacation update...
(Preview)
Hi my MIP friends......we're back!!! For those wondering, the vacation was lovely! It wa SO nice to be able to relax and let someone else drive (it's been 20 years) and to spend time with my wonderful family doing exactly what we wanted, for as long as we wanted, and to be able to relax and do nothing if we...
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Doingmybest
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2
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500
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Assets and Impostors
(Preview)
Been thinking about assets thanks to hotrod and MM bringing them to the forefront this week. I think I have, over time, developed a fear of one of my strongest assets. Tenacity. I'm not a quitter. I stick with things through the brutal end. This is an asset, similar to loyalty and devotion, but its im...
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almostThere
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1
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374
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Alcoholism and Narcotics
(Preview)
Hi all. I went to my first Al-Anon meeting last night. It took everything I had to get over my mortification and take the first steps in helping myself learn to cope with my younger sisters addiction. (She has lived with me for 5 - years.) I am learning the steps and working on finding a sponsor - and basi...
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JayOhDeeEye
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6
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2534
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One STONE At a Time ....
(Preview)
Welp... The Family Believes I'm Crazy... (Something different in my Alcoholic addicted World)...lol I Enjoy Photography, of many Kinds, My Favorite is Outdoors, and I'm Not much of a Fan of People Pics... I'd Much Rather do Critters and Such... BUT... I was Researching my Family at a Local Cemeter...
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Jozie
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3
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533
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Gracious...It's the old me!!
(Preview)
Wednesday Night Turning Point AFG is my home group and recently I invited an AA member who was being done in by a "qualifier" son. He came back last evening some what loosened up emotionally by the first meeting and God was I not face to face with my old ego and behavior? He ranted and did hi...
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Jerry F
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4
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521
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Sad...very sad...and angry and concerned
(Preview)
For my native brothers and sisters and wishing I was with them up on the Mountain as they stand for our native culture in solidarity while the police and state arrest the young and old who protect our Cultural Spiritual sites. Mauna Kea the sacred mountain considered by so many the center of spiritu...
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Jerry F
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11
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800
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Did I get the job?
(Preview)
Tomorrow marks one month since I started here. I'm counting that as my recovery anniversary. May 24th, 2015. Boy, that's not very long. Kinda scary that I've only been at this one month. Kinda puts things in perspective. (too much [sic] perspective). Deep Breath. Back to work. (God grant me...
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almostThere
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11
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590
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I live with a roomate
(Preview)
I have been reading a lot on the board and its helping me focus on me only. I feel alone a lot of times as my alcoholic BF is not present. He is either working, sleeping or drunk on his day off. He works 6 days a week night shift and on the one day off he has he is drunk out of his mind. He will start drinking at 6 am wh...
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joker
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3
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568
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Re-discovering Lost Passions
(Preview)
As I have progressed in my recovery one of the things that I began to lament was how many of the things I enjoyed doing, or people I enjoyed seeing, I left behind as my AW's disease spiraled out of control. I used to play golf every weekend, and discovered I had played maybe 2-3 rounds total in the past 3 yea...
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Dave2554
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5
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564
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C2C reading 6-25
(Preview)
C2C reading for today, June 25 speaks about Step Six--. Becoming entirely ready to have HP remove our defects of character. The reading defines the defects of characters as roadblocks that keep us stranded-- not able to freely travel life's magnificent Boulevard. The reading and goes on to d...
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hotrod
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2
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444
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Who invented this term and where can I find them?
(
1 2
)
(Preview)
"Functional Alcoholic" Not having the best day, but still better than it used to be because I have al-anon. Just feel a quick need to vent about this term. It's a veil. Rose colored glasses. A facade. A crutch. A license to steal. A license to abuse. A finger that points at everyone else. ...
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almostThere
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61
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1725
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Hope for Today 6-24 ...encouraging and understanding the A
(Preview)
Today's HfT addresses an important concept found in Tradition 5: "Each Al-Anon Group has but one purpose: to help families of Alcoholics. We do this by practicing the 12 Steps ourselves, by encouraging and understanding our alcoholic relatives,..." The contributor acknowledges the...
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Enigmatic
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3
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563
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Maybe he's right and it's not the booze. Maybe he's just an a**hole!
(Preview)
i'm of an age where I have gotten used to sleeping with a small fan clipped on my headboard blowing on my head. I get terrible night sweats and hot flashes and without my little fan I wake up several times a night. So, since my ah stopped drinking he has had trouble sleeping. When I have trouble sleeping bec...
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JukuVee
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7
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747
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Father's Day is hard
(Preview)
This is my first time here and my first time writing. Father's day was a rough day for me this year. I'm 30 years old, happily married, and far enough away from my hometown. My father is an alcoholic and a drug addict. My mom divorced my father when I was 4 and is married now. My father never did anything for...
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dandelion2007
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3
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524
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And now he steals my sadness!
(Preview)
My AH and I had to put our 8yr old Bullmastiff to sleep on Wednesday, he was battling a horrible infection that left him unable to walk and in a lot of pain. Anyone who has lost a pet knows how sad it is, they are like family members. In our house there is a huge void now (Literally HUGE, he was 140lbs) I am miss...
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CoopsMom
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11
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614
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I broke my bus
(Preview)
well, not completely broke but I bent it - from childhood, my first instinct is to hide it, don't talk about it, don't say anything and maybe it will blow over and no one will notice and I won't get in trouble for it. Of COURSE I didn't play it that way, I'm an adult now! I sent a text to my boss saying what had ha...
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likemyheart
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3
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448
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C2C 6-24
(Preview)
C2C reading for today stress the importance of changing our attitudes and viewing ourselves and our actions in a positive light It points out that as a result of living with the disease of alcoholism we become disappointed by our inability to fix the situation and our self esteem and self worth suff...
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hotrod
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3
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361
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Works When I Work it :)
(Preview)
Funny How things Have Changed :) When I Got to this Program I Was a Broken Mess of Emotions, I Assumed EVERYTHING and Knew Nothing... I Panicked at the Sight of On Coming Doom, I took Everything EVERYONE (Even those I Didn't Know) Personal.. And then Of Course Thru My Own Sick Piece of Panic to it and Mad...
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Jozie
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5
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413
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friendships
(Preview)
Winter came early here and I've just concluded a lovely lovely six weeks with my mother. We were grateful to have our time together, us and her grandchildren. It was different this time. Mum is turning 60, she's been a smoker for far too many years and had a hard life thanks to the family disease which bon...
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a4l
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2
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312
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Still at Drug and Alcohol studies and enjoying the challenges....
(Preview)
Just stopping in to say Hello, Hope you all doing good and taking those small steps to progress and growing along the way. I know I am Lots of challenges, in my 4th Mod, 8 more to go, passed my Ethics exam ....boy theres a lot to this counseling. Stay well and One Day At A Time... Hugs, Bettina Hey Jerry, A...
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Beatrice
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5
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370
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It's nice to get...
(Preview)
this (((((()))))) when I feel like this )))))) (((((( What a great place. Time to make a gratitude and assets list. Great weather My Kids My Kids My Kids My Kids My Job Good Father's Day New Shoes Most bills paid Son's got a gig on my birthday Daughter home safe from FireFly Festival Gas Tank Half Fu...
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almostThere
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3
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355
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Down to brass tacks
(Preview)
Struggling lately. Back to the beginning. Newbies (like me), it all starts with the Serenity Prayer. I find I'm having to say it out loud or under my breath repeatedly, and at times in a constant loop. The main thing it does, especially when repeated out loud, is to physically provide an audible sti...
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almostThere
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6
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518
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Haven't been online in ages but....(long post)
(Preview)
It's been quite some time since I have been on. I thought I was doing so well in my recovery, so we'll I don't need to go to meetings or practice daily meditations, denial at its finest I guess.....
Briefly, my father is a functioning alcoholic, my brother is what I consider a typical alcoholic; no job,...
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mynewlife
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4
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413
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Leaving on a jet plane ..
(Preview)
Don't know when I'll be back again .. LOL .. I wish. I know when I will be back. The kids are staying with my mom for 5 weeks total. I will be there for a week. I'm very nervous because she's very needy and I worry about the kids. Sooo grateful for program as well as a warped sense of humor. It will be a good...
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SerenityRUS
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8
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424
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When you listen...
(Preview)
God speaks. A while back I got a book, a meditational reader with that title from someone else in program. It was a great read and I passed it on to someone else in program. I wish I had another copy now. When I first got it the title messed with my thinking a bit, like maybe it was backwards or such...&q...
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Jerry F
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6
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596
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Hope for Today June 23
(Preview)
Good morning Everyone- Today's reading is about our ability to trust our intuition in various situations, and the many ways we are able to work the 12th step as we try to carry the message to others. The reading describes a scene where the writer spontaneously decided to hug someone she had been work...
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yanksfan51
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4
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458
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Overcoming Anger
(Preview)
First, I'd like to say what an inspiration everyone has been to me on here. Although I haven't posted myself, I've spent much time reading along with many of your stories and find much encouragement in all of your words. With that being said, I have to admit that in my own situation, I still have a lot of...
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WorkingOnMe
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4
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435
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