The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
The C2C reading for 6-26 speaks about" forgiveness". It points out that when we first enter Al-Anon we are filled with bitterness towards many people in our lives. That after attending meetings for a while, keeping an open mind and listening to learn, we finally learn to keep the focus on ourselves we began to see that this bitterness only hurts us.
The more we practice the tools of the program, such as the serenity prayer and meditation we come to see the alcoholic in our lives may be a messenger that HP used to point us in the direction of help.
We choose to tolerate a great deal of unacceptable behavior because we were unwilling to admit that we needed help, and that our faulty belief system insisted that the alcoholic must change and that we were fine.
By finally surrendering and picking up the Al-Anon tools, we come to realize that although hurtful things were said and done along the way we have a choice and can refuse to carry the burden of bitterness any further-- instead I can pick up the tools offered by Al-Anon and be grateful for what I've learned.
The thought for the day suggests that we should not allow old resentments to drag us down because we are building a better and more loving life today.
And the quote is from Mary McLeod Bethune; "forgiving is not forgetting it is letting go of the hurt."
Thank you Al-Anon for giving me the 12 steps especially four through 10 because they were the short sometimes painful steps to freedom from the burden of my anger, resentment, self-pity and fear. What a burden it was to carry around all that negativity and how lovely serenity feels.
Thank you for sharing such a great page and topic. This page is a great example of the wisdom, strength and hope that can be found in the daily readers. Such a great reminder to start the day and recall when I struggle with feelings of resentment.
As I look back on my negative feelings when I first came to AlAnon, I too am so grateful for the guidance the Program supplies, along with the incredible strength of the fellowship.
Thank you AlAnon, and thank you for your service!
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Paul
"...when we try to control others, we lose the ability to manage our own lives." - Paths to Recovery
Thank you for sharing this Betty. It isn't always to easy to let go of old resentments and even bitterness. Sometimes the most helpful thought for me is to realize feeding those old feelings is not serving me in my new life.
Love this reading for today. It reminds me that holding on to all the issues, thoughts, feelings, etc. from the past are detrimental to my present and future.
The longer I am around, the more I can practice forgiving - and it's a practice for me as my old behaviors are still close to the surface.
We have a saying that we say around here, when angry and having difficulties letting go - I will show you.....I will hurt me! This reminds me that when I hold on to anger, resentment and the like, I am only hurting me. Those who I allow to disrupt my serenity usually don't even know it or give a second thought to it/me.
Thank you Betty as always for your share + ESH!!!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Thanks everyone-- As I reflected on this page I thought that alanon prinicples "Talk" easy but at times the walk is hard. That is why meetings and conecting with others who are walking the walk is so important.
In reading this page today, I was struck by the line that speaks of coming to believe that the A may be the messenger our HP uses to let us know we need to get help. And it isn't necessarily fair to the A to blame them that it took us so long to pay attention to that message.
Wow, so much insight. I love this program.
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Bethany
"Folks are usually about as happy as they make their minds up to be." Abe Lincoln