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Husband not following aftercare plan
(Preview)
My husband did 45 days of treatment and was so optimistic. I was there for the family portion of the program and he had all of these great plans. Then he comes home and each day seemed to take a step back. Met the IOP but didn't enroll. Has only been to one meeting in a week. He has a strong network that he can re...
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Lcle2017
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5
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537
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Called Police on binge drinking gf or 9 years
(Preview)
Let's start with the fact that my long-term live-in girlfriend is a warm, caring, driven, type A person. 99% of the time she is wonderful and then we go to a social function and she can't stop drinking once she has started. This typically results in having a great time until she hits a very defined tipp...
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Mar310
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8
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533
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Mother I haven't spoken to in 2 and a half years called tonight
(Preview)
Little background. My brother was an abusive drug/addict alcoholic who attempted to molest me growing up. She called and made up some story that a child had called her phone and she thought it was one of my boys. I told her it was not them and then she started with the I miss you and the boys. And that she lov...
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jenmom
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6
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434
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Awareness
(Preview)
Now that I have had another life learning experience I am very humbled & grateful. I really know it is true that God doesn't give me more than I can handle but I can't handle these times when I feel overwhelmed. My 74 year old mom is still declining. She is not dying but this is killing me. She still want...
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Hoot Nanny
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4
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374
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Called police
(Preview)
Went to my x-abfs flat today although he had been drinking. My mistake. I couldn't deal with the situation so I just left pretty soon. He hasn't been eating much, I didn't have money to bring over food. Anyway he kept sending me messeges afterwards and finally wrote something like - bye, this time I'll h...
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Aline
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11
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531
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new and struggling
(Preview)
it has been almost three years with my friend including job loss, relationship loss, family alienation, dui, legal troubles, bankruptcy, zero retirement savings anymore, health issues (obv), 15 detoxes, 30 days inpatient, etc. i never had any experience with addiction ever and i thought i was "d...
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bzz123
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14
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560
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New and feeling kind of lost.
(Preview)
I grew up in a home with an alcoholic/drug addict brother. It was an abusive upbringing. My brother was verbally and physically abusive. He attempted, unsuccessfully, to molest me at the age of 9. He would physically abuse me in front of my Mother and as long as she didn't have to deal with it she did noth...
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jenmom
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6
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472
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Second Al Anon Meeting....
(Preview)
My partner has been sober for 17 months now, and works the program very well. We have been together for 6 years, and have recently moved in together with promises made. Now that he is completely focused on himself, he dropped a bombshell and told me he never wants to get married or have kids. I don't know w...
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cristina622
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3
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387
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Meeting Dominance or Group Conscious Principals
(Preview)
Hi, is it ok for a chairperson to simply change a meeting format and do it "my way" (as it was said) even if there is a group conscious decided format?
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mydogisreallycute
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13
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4938
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Hope for Today July 11
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Today's reading is about the gentleness of our program. Specifically the writer mentions that in his/her recovery there was a realization that when acceptance or someone caring for him/her was felt, there was a type of pain associated with the pleasure. There was difficu...
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yanksfan51
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4
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392
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The obsession
(Preview)
I haven't posted in a while. Things have been very rocky with my alcoholic partner for a long time now, probably always, but there used to be some nice times which have gotten fewer and further between over the last year, whether he is drinking or not. I have been attending al-anon for a long time and real...
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Sorcha
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22
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655
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If I didn't have this program and this board, don't know what I would do!!!!
(Preview)
Every time I text my daughter or her daughters, i get more bad news about sister dearest NOW her lungs are filling up with fluid so bad, her legs look like balloons...she has asked for hospice care, Wednesday , the doctors will re-eval her and give prognosis...she is going out in such a HAAARD way....Pa...
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mamalioness
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6
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445
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Minding my own business .. Need ESH ..
(Preview)
So one thing I have been dealing with is the statement that's really none of my business .. I need a good response when I am told that my sig other doesn't like that statement. He believes as we all have that all aspects of our relationship are mine or his business and the reality is no .. it's not. My defin...
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SerenityRUS
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9
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557
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Losing my serenity
(Preview)
My son is bipolar and off his medication. He does not drink, and I am grateful for that. However, he keeps arguing with me, and he overdrew his checking account. He was arguing with my grandson's mom and I had to talk to her which is very rare. He lives with me and I honestly and thinking about calling the po...
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shrnp
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28
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821
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7/10/17 Courage to Change
(Preview)
Today's author lists our identity as something that is damaged as a result of alcoholism. In the process of fighting the effects of the disease with existing, less efficient tools, doubts and misconceptions about our own character can creep in and become part of how we see ourselves. AlAnon helps u...
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Enigmatic
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7
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401
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Do I stay or do I go?
(Preview)
I've been living with a highly functioning alcoholic for over 25 years. Some days are better than others. I've recently starting seeing a wonderful therapist who often encourages me to attend an Al-Anon meeting. With the help of a therapist, I've started communicating with my adult children ab...
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hopelessONE
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6
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512
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It's been a while
(Preview)
Hi everyone, I haven't posted in a while, things have been tense and strained and I haven't had a lot to say. My AH has been trying I guess, but things felt broken after he was physical with me in may for the first time. I was working everything over in my head and was ready to make a move and call the police if a...
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VickiR
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11
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462
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ODAT Reading 7-9-2017
(Preview)
The ODAT reading for July 9 speaks about self-pity and how destructive this can be to our minds and hearts. It suggests that we may be envying those who have more material things like a house etc or many could be resentful of others because we are bored an hate the monotony in our lives not having en...
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hotrod
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2
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725
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10th Step has been posted to the Step Work Board
(Preview)
Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery together! The 10th Step has been posted to the Step Work Board. Here is the link: http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t63730643...
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hotrod
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1
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284
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Coming of age in Alanon...
(Preview)
Hi y'all... kia ora... I have two 'coming of age' stories... one happened when I was 17. I was doing well at school outwardly- but I was sleepwalking... I was heading for the streets. Being a farm boy I knew how to forage, and never actually went hungry. Mum and dad came home from the pub about 7. Mum chippe...
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DavidG
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4
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429
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Back to normal somewhat??
(Preview)
Okay I've got a wife in the house and can give and receive kisses and truthfully we are just like when she left...normalcy. I love her steadfastness and her calm spirit...Mahalo Akua...Thank you God. Going to step up my Family Group attendance because I am aware of a return of an old defect which do...
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Jerry F
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8
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399
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Courage to Change 8/7
(Preview)
Today's C2c reading recalls the way we experience the world as a child...taking in nature with wonder and awe. It suggests that spending time appreciating nature is a wonderful way to help ourselves experience life one day at a time. It points out that creation doesn't waste time worrying or meddlin...
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MissM
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4
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394
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Parent of an alcoholic
(Preview)
I would like to find support from other parents of an alcoholic. For me it feels different when it's your child who is struggling with addiction. No one wants to lose a loved one but a parent especially doesn't want to lose their child.
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Arda
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13
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1198
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Full Relapse and Affair
(Preview)
I feel like a desperately need help. My husband gained sobriety at a very young age and had been sober many years when we were married. I never knew him as an alcoholic and we didn't discuss it very much. After about 16 years of sobriety, I caught him drinking when we were on vacation about 9 years ago. ...
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wonderwoman75
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13
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675
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How to Cope...
(Preview)
My father has been a drinker for most of his life but for the past five years it's been horrifically bad. Everything from washing him up to calling an ambulance due to his breathing everything has been done on his part as an alcoholic .He came to visit us for the weekend and I got a call from my grandma that m...
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MsMedina
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7
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415
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Courage to Change (C2C) 7/7/17
(Preview)
The daily reading today discusses 'chronic scorekeeping'. The author suggests that with each conflict, there needed to be an at fault person and blame assigning was the norm. The thinking applied included assigning blame, and this caused perpetual defensiveness and anxiety. In recovery, we l...
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Iamhere
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6
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418
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I can't stop crying, need help please!!!!!
(Preview)
Need help! Sorry if this post appears harsh but I am at a loss, and I don't know where to turn to for help. I just want to cry everyday. My /boyfriend/fiancee (will explain) and I have been together for 6 years. I had just gotten out of my marriage and he was getting out of his. Life with him was AMAZING!!!!, l...
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cristina622
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8
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513
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Making a comeback
(Preview)
So a few days ago I felt so defeated. I was excluded from a family gathering, and learned that yet another family member dislikes my A so much, that she never wants to see my A again. For the first time in a very long time, I found myself crying which rarely happens anymore. But when I wrote on the board, I...
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Lyne
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4
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386
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New here
(Preview)
Hi. Just introducing myself. I'm glad to find an online group and hope to connect with others. The last few years have been full of hardship. Now I am having some health problems and am still raising kids on my own . 2 special needs among the group. I am craving some serenity!!
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Rose52
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6
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374
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Dating a recovering alcoholic
(Preview)
I've dated a recovering alcoholic for two years. The relationship started off amazing, I had never felt loved like that before. I knew he was several years in recovery and seemed to be doing well. A few months in his mood swings started. I felt like when we got close he pulled away.
I knew going in there...
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Pacificgirl
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7
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2302
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What did I do to take care of me today????
(Preview)
I like to do "challenge" posts, kinda...FUN, but sorta keeps me focused on what did I do to take care of me today??? I had an old gift certificate from the animal shelter and I almost had forgotten it...well?? i went to the shelter today to visit the doggies and kitties and I met this canine charmer...3 m...
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mamalioness
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16
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530
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Courage to Change (C2C) 7/6/17
(Preview)
Good morning MIP - Happy Thursday!! Today's reading talks about how many of us came to Al-Anon with the deep feeling and thought that - "It isn't fair!!" Most of us feel we deserve better after all we've been through and just believe we've been dealt a "raw deal". The prayer quoted in the "Just for Today...
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Iamhere
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6
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489
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Grateful
(Preview)
I want to share my gratitude today. It's been exactly 6 months since my first Alanon meeting today, and I feel like celebrating. I've been looking forward to this "semi anniversary" for a couple of weeks now much like a kid waiting for her birthday, although I didn't really expect any presents :) I'm ju...
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Aline
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11
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484
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Recovery work is not easy at times ..
(Preview)
The holidays have always been stressful and it's been a long time since I have been through 3 day weekends and so on with another person. Christmas and T-day were easier because we were newer into the relationship I think. We were on his territory not mine. I'm flexible like that .. lol .. it has to be p...
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SerenityRUS
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9
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474
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Feeling Resentful
(Preview)
I am not sure what to do with these feelings, so I am posting about them in the hopes that I can release them into cyberspace and then move on. I was hit yesterday with AH's hospital bill... or at least the EOB saying the stay was "non-medical," and therefore denied. Over $35,000.00!!! I had a feeling that...
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PosiesandPuppies
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15
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591
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Alcoholism as a "brain disease"
(
1 2
)
(Preview)
I have been reading a lot lately. Mostly my codie books, but also the "Rethinking Drinking" series by Linda Burlison. These books speak to me, because I have a science background, and I have always loved science. Show me some facts/research and I can relate much better. Probably why religion has alwa...
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PosiesandPuppies
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53
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2151
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I'm losing her piece by piece
(Preview)
hospital will transfer my sister to a skilled care facility because our girls cannot cope with one so sick...her lungs are full of fluid so they are draining them as she cannot breathe....she will not get liver biopsy because she is well aware of the stress to her already frail and failing body....and...
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mamalioness
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19
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590
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Still Lost Even When He Is Sober
(Preview)
I am not sure what finally brought me here or admit my issues except I know that I cannot accept the person I have become any longer. My husband has not had a drink in 2 years 3 months 4 days yet I relive it daily. I am angry and scared every single day. I wait for the "slip up" always. I can't bring myself to...
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niki48
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11
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538
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Leaving with the kids.
(Preview)
Ok so it's not what the subject sounds like. I'm going on vacation and taking the kids out of town for a few days. My AW did not want to go so it's just us. It feels really weird. I know we'll have fun. I know she'll get some peace and quiet. I also know this could be a bad sign and I think it's why I've had a certain...
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WestMan
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24
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740
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7-5-17 C2C Detachment
(Preview)
Today's page is one of several pages in C2C which sheds light on the many ways detachment is helpful to recovery when put into action. The author describes detachment as 'freedom to own what is mine and to allow others to own what is theirs'. This is helpful in all interactions. Use within the fellowshi...
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Enigmatic
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6
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446
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Just for me
(Preview)
I've changed my avatar just for today because it helps to affirm my cultural spirit so much of which is anchored onto and in my program...I will not make any political or national statements just revealing my roots. Mahalo ((((Hugs))))
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Jerry F
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8
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461
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Jumbled- Status Quo.
(Preview)
Hi all--- I have been a little MIA, health and work and then much needed family time with my parents and boys. It's been relaxing, getting a lot of projects around the house done, cleaning out the crap... feels great! Everything here is... status quo. I'm going to meetings, reaching out when I'm react...
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pumkin26
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2
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384
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Partners do not always recover at the same time.
(Preview)
Today I went to see my A ex-bf. He is doing really good. He has not had anything to drink in six months, he found a nice house to rent. He lives in a quiet community near his family. He even has cats, and he is taking care of them. The small things are really important because previously he could barely take ca...
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shrnp
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9
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494
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Nightmares
(Preview)
I think I have posted about this before but it's back. It seems as though when my life starts to go smoothly and I have periods of not worrying so much about other things that I start to have nightmares. I've put more effort into my program lately than I have in a while and I have really seen the benefits. ...
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KT2015
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10
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451
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Having more difficulty with AH than usual
(Preview)
Yesterday evening I came home from work to find an empty vodka bottle on the living room floor. I wasn't surprised, yesterday was payday. I just picked it up and went into our bedroom where my AH was lying on the bed with the food and drink (that I've asked him before to not have b/c he spills it all the time)...
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PosiesandPuppies
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20
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3475
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recovery sure helps when you need it
(Preview)
Hi all! It's been months since I've been here. Durning that time I continued to work on my own recovery, I began to focus less on AH and more on me. Letting my faith grow. For whatever reason, I learnt I am ment to be where I am, HP has a plan for me. When I first came here that was very hard to understand. In the p...
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Curlyblu
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6
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374
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Meeting Room Chairs Needed
(Preview)
Hi Today ,i visited the chat room to check on the Morning meetings. Courage was there and ready to conduct a meeting. We chatted a little and it appears that we still need chair persons to conduct the meetings in both the morning and evening. it is quite simple and Training is available Let myself...
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hotrod
|
0
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285
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Hope for Today July 4
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- I apologize for the late posting today- I am away from home and it took me a bit to figure out how to log in to the site! Today's reading is a focus on how alcoholism impacts intimacy and sexuality. As I read this it was a reminder for me about how pervasive the disease is and the effec...
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yanksfan51
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3
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357
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7-3-17 ODAT
(Preview)
Today's author points to the joy of having members in the group who demonstrate a positive, joyful demeanor that is nearly impossible to grab onto and adopt. Yet it is often these same ones whose story includes very difficult times and who arrived AlAnon broken and hopeless. Reminder: The more I dig i...
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Enigmatic
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6
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466
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When it seems that LIFE has it in for you
(Preview)
Since december, it has been one thing after another: My client and friend gets killed in a car wreck and now my work is less and struggling more financially Sister #1 in March decides she wants out of here (she had Alzheimers) and so she stopped drinking and eating and is dead 1 week later April, I have to p...
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mamalioness
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14
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1402
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Family so dysfunctional
(Preview)
I guess I'm going to try and laugh at my family instead of having a pity party. My sister and nephews are visiting for 3 days from CA. They are staying with an older brother who is a borderline psychopath. My sister loves him. I have a really nice brother and he and my sister aren't speaking. The older...
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Lyne
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6
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1936
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Valuable Alanon lesson
(Preview)
Well last night I did get hurt and today I am using my tools and I KNOW I will make a strong comeback . The valuable Alanon lesson comes from learning to focus on myself. Because when the Foo and the spouse and other people hurt and let me down, I have myself, I have HP, I have my tools (getting a good workout...
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Lyne
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5
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487
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ODAT Reading 7-2-2017
(Preview)
The ODAT reading for July 2 speaks about experiencing the joy of living. It points out that, new members are astonished to learn that many of the happiest people at the meeting were also burdened with a wall black despair. when they first found program . It was Al-Anon that brought the joy of livin...
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hotrod
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8
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559
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Monday Morning Alanon Meeting in Progress
(Preview)
Please join us in the chatroom if you need a meeting. Our chair is Courage, our topics are GRATITUDE.. MAKING A LIST, AND OPEN ALANON TOPIC.
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tiredtonite
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1
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279
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Hi I'm Back Again 2 Years Later
(Preview)
I haven't been on this board for quite some time. I reread my old post and the responses and unfortunately, I am insane (doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results). My husband continues to relapse despite nearly dying from an overdose just over a year ago, and another overdo...
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misterpiko
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4
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456
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Step One.
(Preview)
My step one used to go like this: Admitted that I was powerless over xxxx and that my life had become unmanageable. Over the years I have put a lot of things in that middle frame- including alcoholism and addiction. Last night we had a 'chip night' with three grandkids, mum and dad... it was really good...
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DavidG
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10
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562
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Checking out this Al-Anon thing. Not sure I want to go to a meeting.
(Preview)
Ive resisted the Al-Anon program for years. My attitude has always been, Im not the alcoholic, why do I need to go to meetings? Im not the one who screwed up our family. I am VERY angry and bitter. I know this and I just dont think theres anything wrong with that. I hate my ex and why shouldnt I? My stor...
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Lu0519
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21
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598
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Overwhelmed with sadness
(Preview)
Well, My AH of almost 14 years came home drunk and very angry Friday morning (a week ago) because I wouldn't give him a ride home from the bar. I guess he ended up walking home and was fuming mad by the time he got there. He woke me up but when I layed back down to avoid the alcohol induced arguments he loved to g...
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Dlove
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21
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2710
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Tired and sad after every exchange.
(Preview)
I've a fairly odd relationship with my mother, really. If I tried to explain it all, I'd probably break the forum by submitting too much text. Maybe the whole internet. Theres a lot of "stuff" from childhood that I used to think didn't bother me and actually, as I get older (and I hope healthier) it actua...
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MissM
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8
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637
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I'm new and struggling
(Preview)
Hi, I'm new here and I'm hoping to find some support and maybe some helpful advice. I feel the need to share what got me here. My wife is an alcoholic. We have an 18 month old son. She ended up incarcerated after a violent altercation that landed me in the ER when our son was just over months old, yes a little o...
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Daddy M
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3
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561
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