Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

_bunny_ · _bunny_

Today I told my AH that the boys and I are not coming home this weekend. I could use some time to myself, to catch up on some cleaning and errands and also self care kind of stuff, yoga, reading etc....I continue to live an hour away from our home during the work week and go home on the weekends. The move and ne...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I am looking outside the box at this point and I am ok with where I am at .. my daughter goes for her appointment and I have 100 other stresses happening all of which I create for myself .. LOL .. somehow it will all workout .. it's all I have at the moment. This week has been stressful however been incredibly...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading discusses how the program helps us accept who we are as well as accepting who others are. We are reminded that the tools of our program help us recognize that we have value - simply because we breathe the breath of humanity. As we use the program tools, work with a sponsor and recover, w...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

Topics are "Enabling, how am I contributing?" and Open Topic (Alanon) Courage is our chairperson this morning.

sunmustshine · sunmustshine

On vacation. AH was doing great staying sober then began to slip. Realized he had a sunburn last night and flew off the handle claiming I didn't put sunblock on him properly when asked because I'm so lazy. So gross. The kicker is I have the same sunburn on my back. Guess who put my sunblock on? Ha! Of course...

a4l · a4l

So I abandoned FB five or six years ago, because I didn't like it. Recently, for the sake of my family project, I had to get back on. It made me a bit anxious but there were also long-term friends I cut off in the process whom it was good to contact again. True friends, you know who they are with time, that's fo...

Teddy · Teddy

My A Husband and I have been separated for 16 months - he lives in an apt building we own. He has been mia since last Wednesday. Holder up in his apt now for days drinking alone. This happens every few months. I am wirried bevause he is not gking to wotk. We have 3 children. what am I to do? In the pas...

Lyne · Lyne

I accept, detach, don't try to control, etc., and I cannot get used to my A's continued lying. She expects me to instantaneously believe her, after 20+ years of lying. Last night and this morning she is angry, has a very loud volume, and I am trying to stay calm. She is unable to put herself in my shoes....

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading is about denial and learning how to face the reality of the past without placing blame or wallowing in self-pity but instead to learn from it. Today's reminder --- There is much to learn from the past, but I cannot allow past hurts to smolder and destroy today. Instead, I can ask my Hi...

Mercywilkins · Mercywilkins

Hello Im New here! My husband just got back from rehab he was there for two months He has been back for two weeks now and I am wondering what is happening with our marriage. For three years he was not available to us for two months he was gone he is back and only into himself we live apart we have two grown chil...

WestMan · WestMan

A couple weeks ago my AW had me look at a new red/purple mark that had appeared on her breast. It's an odd pattern and just a bit bigger than a quarter. Obviously not normal and I urged her to make an appointment with the physician. I'm not too worried yet. She does have an immune disease which results in all...

Blue61 · Blue61

I am new here. My AB has been sober for 6 weeks now and before he was sober he would be so attentive loving and would want to hang out all the time. Now he doesn't call me, text or come over ( we are neighbors) I feel like he can only love me when he has been drinking. I really am upset by his behaviour towards me as...

bud · bud

Hi my Alanon Family, It's been a while between my posts. I've been struggling because my relationship has been declining. I knew for a while my needs were not getting met and when I approached my bf, I realized he had put up walls and was not emotonally available. I couldn't pull the trigger on the relati...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Good morning MIP! Today's reading in Courage to Change is about the Second Tradition (For our group purpose there is but one authority - a loving God as he may express himself in our group conscience. Our leaders are but trusted servants - they do not govern). The author reflects on their desire to con...

girlinthisworld · girlinthisworld

I'm 19 years old, and my mum has been drinking since I was about 10/11, and it's gradually worsened over the years. She's not a physically abusive drunk but instead is emotionally abusive, saying horrible things to me and my dad, and really anyone who's in the room and may have challenged her about her d...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Glad I had a program to take with me and use cause other wise I would still be in tantrums. Was in the wrong place at the wrong time with the wrong people who had no power to do anything except to point in other directions at other people in office. I have to go knock on the doors of others, some of whom I ha...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

My daughter has been battling consistent anxiety of sorts for a LONG time and we are in the throws of figuring out a few things. Yesterday was the scariest day as a parent to date and if I don't have a scarier moment I'm seriously ok with that for like .. ever. My girl had a panic attack which lead to literal...

a4l · a4l

Well, I had a nice experience that was also new for me recently. As part of my foo project, I've been getting hold of as many cousins as possible. I sent a quick, polite message to one cousin and she replied. After that, I felt a deep, aching sadness, and I came to reflect on our relationship, which began...

Jerry F · Jerry F

I have been invited by the mayor and county council to speak with them about the alcohol problems we are and have been having on the island. I got into the literature to help me align motives and expectations so will leave the house in just over an hour with a more humble attitude. I did not Cause it, I ca...

hotrod · hotrod

Step 12 has been posted to the Step Work Board Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery together! Here is the link: http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t63800690/al...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am undergoing a lot of stress due to anxiety bad sleep & mom issues. My mom was in the hospital for an extended period of time. Now she is out & I am concerned. Sleep is rough. But I am hanging in there. A little stress from the hot days but isn't it hot everywhere? I will take it day by day. I will reme...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning Everyone: Today's reading highlights an issue many of us have had as a result of having lived with alcoholism in our lives: the tendency to withdraw inward, have difficulty saying what we need to, having difficulty sharing (especially at the first meetings we attended). I apologize to...

NatalieP · NatalieP

Hello all, First just a little bit of info about my situation...I joined this group a few years ago and posted once or twice but went no further.Â Life has been up and down like a roller coaster, as I'm sure you all have experienced.Â I think I've been resistant to finding a local meeting or coming back...

El · El

Hello MIP family! I read the board every single day, but have not felt the energy to participate. It has been an extremely stressful time, but we have all been there, I know. Since December, we have gone from one medical issue to the next, with my 90 year old mother most recently in the hospital. She is...

KT2015 · KT2015

I noticed a little while ago that so much of my frustration was due to me not speaking up. It's kind of hard to describe but some of my old behaviour would be to let everything go, tell everyone everything is ok even if it wasn't and then blow up at the smallest thing that went wrong when I couldn't take it an...

septembergirl · septembergirl

Hi, I am new here. I wonder if anyone relates or can help. This is a long post, I know. I have an alcoholic sister. She is 33. She drinks daily, has had a DUI, and even been to rehab. She has been one for about a decade now. It hasn't affected my life much until 4 years ago because we've lived in separate places...

Aline · Aline

Today my ex-abf got bitten pretty badly by our/his cat. He's not castrated, and can become crazy sometimes with no good reason. The good news - I didn't rush to ex-abf's apartment to save the day like I have done so many times before. He asked me to come over and bring him painkillers. He said I was the only...

Jerry F · Jerry F

When I first got into the program the ladies in the room use to talk about "Their Qualifier" and/or "Their Alcoholic" I was intrigued until I came to understand that truthfully could not qualify the person who got them into the room as the husband the wanted to be married to and live their lives out wi...

Jayla · Jayla

So I have posted before about my prayers to HP to know the truth about my AH. And HP's answers were quick and enlightening. Very quickly after asking HP, I found out my AH was having an affair and kicked him out of our home. I had already had enough of being left home alone while he was out drinking and partyi...

Charlotte22 · Charlotte22

Hi Everyone, I do NOT want to isolate and I need to call or go to a meeting but my father who is my qualifier died 6 months ago and he was very rageful and hurtful to me. We did not really have a proper goodbye and I THOUGHT that I had forgiven him and healed but it opened up flood gates for me. I am in my 50s now a...

Lyne · Lyne

The reading for today discusses how easily one can become overwhelmed, especially in an alcoholic household. It can be difficult to get organized and know what to do first. But if you can break things down into manageable pieces, that is the idea behind "One Day At A Time." You can even take one task a...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODAT reading for today, July 30 (my birthday) is very apropo. The reading asks the question:' what am I going to do with this day"? It points out that the day has so many hours in it and in order to really appreciate it to the fullest we can make a plan to not waste a moment worrying about yesterday nor...

el-cee · el-cee

Self doubt and insecurity have leaked into my relationship a little. I get the negative self talk like am I attractive enough for him? Are the women he was with better at...being women really. I feel like I'm a new women. While living with my ex I refused to be a woman. I wouldn't wear make up or get my hair d...

JDas09 · JDas09

I am struggling while the alcoholic I love is in treatment. He relapsed two weeks ago and made the decision to not just detox but to go away and get the help he needs. I am very happy for him as he wouldn't even talk about going away again it was a hot topic. But he did it! The problem is I am struggling with the l...

Isthisreallife · Isthisreallife

It's been a few months since.i posted last. I swear I like I'm with Dr jackel and mr Hyde. My husband is a train wreck and he knows. The last.of the shenanigans I posted about breaking into my medication lock box and taxing 5 of Ambien and several bubitol asspap caps (benzo for migraine) and drank 1/2 of 1...

a4l · a4l

I think I have grown as a person over the last five years. Still a bit bull at a gate but not without stopping to think a whole heap more than I used to. I've taken it upon myself to attempt pulling together my wider foo for a cultural matter. I wish I had the solid program of my program idols like Betty

no l...

mamalioness · mamalioness

Gratitude list might sound "odd" as I grieve the death of my only BIO sister but really it helps me to go ODAT in relative peace I am thankful that my sister is not in pain anymore and who now is whole and in the happy place I am grateful that my health is good and my blood tests came out good Grateful that my o...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's page points to AlAnon as a spiritual program in which religious affiliation or belief is not required. It is vital, however, to conceive of and rely on a power greater than ourselves that will bring meaning to our Step work and recovery.It matters not what we call our higher power, for some it h...

mamalioness · mamalioness

Hi everyone!!! I hope this evening finds you all well and at peace..I am doing the ODAT slogan big time...There are times I am "normal" (oh yea! right!) and then like the tides, the grief comes in a wave and I have to let the feelings pass through me... Practicing being in the present helps, AND I am in cha...

Iamhere · Iamhere

I am so grateful that I do the best I can to work a program....sometimes, life just 'builds up' - this is my 'dump' ... if you will. I am heading out the door for softball shortly and just need to share... I've spoken before - large family. I am close with all my cousins and we all have families, children, e...

hotrod · hotrod

Good Morning All. The ODAT reading for today 7-28 speaks about progress in alanon recovery . It notes that progress in the Al-Anon program may appear to be lacking but that if we keep coming back and using the tools, meetings, slogans, steps, sponsors, and daily readings. one day we will find...

usf1970 · usf1970

I'm in a bit of a crisis (self-inflicted) and my sponsor is on vacation. I don't want to bother her. I have a medically complex 8 yo grandson and he is currently in the hospital. I read a FB post on my daughter's page about another child having similar problems and it turned out that the issue was cancer. Th...

WestMan · WestMan

Was giving a good friend a ride this morning. Eventually during our conversation she asked how my AW has been and was wondering if she was still going to meetings. She said my wife had told her about the addiction and starting AA. I told her that I appreciated her asking but that she would have to ask my wif...

Iamhere · Iamhere

The reading today is about adopting healthy behaviors to replace adaptive unhealthy behaviors many of us practice before recovery. The writer discusses the suggested closing portion --- "let there be no gossip or criticism of one another." --- and works hard to leave judgmental attitudes out...

SoggySlippers · SoggySlippers

Just wanted to say hello again.It's been awhile since I've been here and it's good to be back. As much as I try to make myself believe that I don't need people,that I can deal with all of this on my own,it's simply a big fat lie.

mamalioness · mamalioness

I wrote this on Facebook this morning the doctors told the girls Jane was imminent and they would give her one more morphine to make sure there was no pain They didn't have to drug her..She , when her breathing mask was pulled off, barely fluttered her eyes and she passed away peacefully....Thank you A...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

This weekend was the trip back to Illinois and really had a nice time .. it was good to see old friends and watch the kids have fun. I did not see my daughter much as she was out and about with her BFF. I love those kids without question and I feel so badly that they don't have the same relationships here curr...

Kmtaylor · Kmtaylor

Hi today the concept of powerlessness has been reinforced. I realize I can't control or change what my AH is doing. I feel so disrespected I just don't know how to handle it. My AH uses other things as well and has been leaving things around the house. I don't want to see it, smell it, nothing. I don't want i...

Ducky · Ducky

Hello, I am new to this forum, and came her specifically for some opinions on the matter of my MIL. My husband and I are expecting our first child in January and had our gender reveal this last weekend. I picked up his mother and brought her to our home, when she got to our home within 15 minutes she could bar...

BethBethBeth · BethBethBeth

Hi all. I just need to vent and hopefully get some ESH. My AH and I have been in therapy a month. He admitted to being a 'problem drinker' (right?) in our first session. I have known this for a while and been going to alanon and working the steps one day at a time so I am a baby in recovery. In our third sessi...

a4l · a4l

It drives me absolutely nuts to deal with a 62 year old professional victim. Everything's so rooted in the past and its just selfish. Everyone has had problems been hurt. Why can't we lock people in a room and slogan them to health?? Grrr. Just a foo vent. I must remind myself, Christopher Robyn didn't t...

kadriliisa · kadriliisa

Where i can find al anon book Pathways to recovery electronically?

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

The author of today's page addressed the illusions that can limit serenity: The illusion that we can or should control others, and the illusion that the emptiness we feel inside can be filled with something outside of our self. AlAnon suggests that healing begins when we see what we need to heal withi...

Rakiaanan · Rakiaanan

i am really weak now , i keep forgiving my boyfriend drunk behavior . up and down . i can love him anymore

a4l · a4l

Today I am grateful for my sanity as I know it, work in progress that it is. I'm waist deep with the foo, and its great but there are definite aspects of certifiably insane, literally. Having said that, every generation brings a bit of hope. Makes me wonder how much of mental illness is a fear defense. ...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good Morning Everyone- Today's reading is about the defense mechanisms we may learn having grown up or living with alcoholism. The writer specifically mentions how he/she learned to hide from his/her alcoholic parents. Over time the writer learned to hide in obvious ways, and more subtle, such...

Mapper · Mapper

I am someone who is a doer. I've always been one to get things done when they need to get done. I'm constantly cleaning the house, doing yardwork, running errands, paying bills. I rarely sit still for 5 minutes when H is at work because that's my time to get things done. Because when he's home he'll make ja...

kayS · kayS

I'm new here and, I don't know, sort of new to life with an alcoholic/addict. 6 years now. To me it feels more and more like this is my life rather than a bump in the road. My husband of 23 years - someone I've been involved with since we were both in 8th grade (so 33 years now), is addicted to opiates. It st...

nobody7 · nobody7

I am new to this message though not new to the program. I have gone through so many changes in the last five years that were very necessary for my well being. I am in a safe place and doing okay. But I am having trouble with going to any meetings so this feels safe to me for right now. I work the program as b...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's page considers the struggling newcomer to AlAnon, and suggests not overwhelming them further with a flood of advice. A warm welcome, some encouragement and reassurance is suggested. A newcomer's arrival can benefit all as it is an opportunity for them to find relief and hope, and for us to b...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Not my norm (Preview) Today I told my AH that the boys and I are not coming home this weekend. I could use some time to myself, to catch up on some cleaning and errands and also self care kind of stuff, yoga, reading etc....I continue to live an hour away from our home during the work week and go home on the weekends. The move and ne...	_bunny_	4	823	Aug 5, 2017 by mamalioness
	Outside the box .. (Preview) I am looking outside the box at this point and I am ok with where I am at .. my daughter goes for her appointment and I have 100 other stresses happening all of which I create for myself .. LOL .. somehow it will all workout .. it's all I have at the moment. This week has been stressful however been incredibly...	SerenityRUS	6	504	Aug 4, 2017 by shrnp
	Courage to Change (C2C) 8/4/17 (Preview) Today's reading discusses how the program helps us accept who we are as well as accepting who others are. We are reminded that the tools of our program help us recognize that we have value - simply because we breathe the breath of humanity. As we use the program tools, work with a sponsor and recover, w...	Iamhere	6	453	Aug 4, 2017 by Iamhere
	Friday Morning Meeting in Progress (Preview) Topics are "Enabling, how am I contributing?" and Open Topic (Alanon) Courage is our chairperson this morning.	tiredtonite	1	467	Aug 4, 2017 by hotrod
	Nastiness (Preview) On vacation. AH was doing great staying sober then began to slip. Realized he had a sunburn last night and flew off the handle claiming I didn't put sunblock on him properly when asked because I'm so lazy. So gross. The kicker is I have the same sunburn on my back. Guess who put my sunblock on? Ha! Of course...	sunmustshine	8	641	Aug 4, 2017 by KT2015
	Mental and emotional freedom (Preview) So I abandoned FB five or six years ago, because I didn't like it. Recently, for the sake of my family project, I had to get back on. It made me a bit anxious but there were also long-term friends I cut off in the process whom it was good to contact again. True friends, you know who they are with time, that's fo...	a4l	12	721	Aug 4, 2017 by bud
	Ah on a bender been days since anyone has seen him (Preview) My A Husband and I have been separated for 16 months - he lives in an apt building we own. He has been mia since last Wednesday. Holder up in his apt now for days drinking alone. This happens every few months. I am wirried bevause he is not gking to wotk. We have 3 children. what am I to do? In the pas...	Teddy	5	536	Aug 4, 2017 by Skorpi
	Lying is so destructive (Preview) I accept, detach, don't try to control, etc., and I cannot get used to my A's continued lying. She expects me to instantaneously believe her, after 20+ years of lying. Last night and this morning she is angry, has a very loud volume, and I am trying to stay calm. She is unable to put herself in my shoes....	Lyne	6	549	Aug 3, 2017 by Iamhere
	Courage to Change (C2C) 8/3/17 (Preview) Today's reading is about denial and learning how to face the reality of the past without placing blame or wallowing in self-pity but instead to learn from it. Today's reminder --- There is much to learn from the past, but I cannot allow past hurts to smolder and destroy today. Instead, I can ask my Hi...	Iamhere	5	552	Aug 3, 2017 by mamalioness
	Alone and angry (Preview) Hello Im New here! My husband just got back from rehab he was there for two months He has been back for two weeks now and I am wondering what is happening with our marriage. For three years he was not available to us for two months he was gone he is back and only into himself we live apart we have two grown chil...	Mercywilkins	16	690	Aug 3, 2017 by mamalioness
	AW won't go to Dr. (Preview) A couple weeks ago my AW had me look at a new red/purple mark that had appeared on her breast. It's an odd pattern and just a bit bigger than a quarter. Obviously not normal and I urged her to make an appointment with the physician. I'm not too worried yet. She does have an immune disease which results in all...	WestMan	10	648	Aug 3, 2017 by KT2015
	Dazed and confused (Preview) I am new here. My AB has been sober for 6 weeks now and before he was sober he would be so attentive loving and would want to hang out all the time. Now he doesn't call me, text or come over ( we are neighbors) I feel like he can only love me when he has been drinking. I really am upset by his behaviour towards me as...	Blue61	4	1381	Aug 3, 2017 by Iamhere
	looking at my part- ESH appreciated (Preview) Hi my Alanon Family, It's been a while between my posts. I've been struggling because my relationship has been declining. I knew for a while my needs were not getting met and when I approached my bf, I realized he had put up walls and was not emotonally available. I couldn't pull the trigger on the relati...	bud	18	721	Aug 3, 2017 by mamalioness
	C2C August 2 second tradition (Preview) Good morning MIP! Today's reading in Courage to Change is about the Second Tradition (For our group purpose there is but one authority - a loving God as he may express himself in our group conscience. Our leaders are but trusted servants - they do not govern). The author reflects on their desire to con...	Skorpi	6	664	Aug 2, 2017 by bud
	My mother is blaming me for everything.. Mum alcoholic daughter mother emotional abuse (Preview) I'm 19 years old, and my mum has been drinking since I was about 10/11, and it's gradually worsened over the years. She's not a physically abusive drunk but instead is emotionally abusive, saying horrible things to me and my dad, and really anyone who's in the room and may have challenged her about her d...	girlinthisworld	4	7826	Aug 2, 2017 by Aline
	Ohhhhhhh well (Preview) Glad I had a program to take with me and use cause other wise I would still be in tantrums. Was in the wrong place at the wrong time with the wrong people who had no power to do anything except to point in other directions at other people in office. I have to go knock on the doors of others, some of whom I ha...	Jerry F	4	468	Aug 2, 2017 by Iamhere
	Prayers Please (Preview) My daughter has been battling consistent anxiety of sorts for a LONG time and we are in the throws of figuring out a few things. Yesterday was the scariest day as a parent to date and if I don't have a scarier moment I'm seriously ok with that for like .. ever. My girl had a panic attack which lead to literal...	SerenityRUS	17	774	Aug 2, 2017 by _bunny_
	A patient amends (Preview) Well, I had a nice experience that was also new for me recently. As part of my foo project, I've been getting hold of as many cousins as possible. I sent a quick, polite message to one cousin and she replied. After that, I felt a deep, aching sadness, and I came to reflect on our relationship, which began...	a4l	13	590	Aug 2, 2017 by PosiesandPuppies
	Intentions and perspectives (Preview) I have been invited by the mayor and county council to speak with them about the alcohol problems we are and have been having on the island. I got into the literature to help me align motives and expectations so will leave the house in just over an hour with a more humble attitude. I did not Cause it, I ca...	Jerry F	10	590	Aug 2, 2017 by Jerry F
	Step 12 (Preview) Step 12 has been posted to the Step Work Board Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery together! Here is the link: http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t63800690/al...	hotrod	0	530	Aug 1, 2017 by hotrod
	stress but ok (Preview) I am undergoing a lot of stress due to anxiety bad sleep & mom issues. My mom was in the hospital for an extended period of time. Now she is out & I am concerned. Sleep is rough. But I am hanging in there. A little stress from the hot days but isn't it hot everywhere? I will take it day by day. I will reme...	Hoot Nanny	5	460	Aug 1, 2017 by Iamhere
	Hope for Today Aug 1 (Preview) Good morning Everyone: Today's reading highlights an issue many of us have had as a result of having lived with alcoholism in our lives: the tendency to withdraw inward, have difficulty saying what we need to, having difficulty sharing (especially at the first meetings we attended). I apologize to...	yanksfan51	4	493	Aug 1, 2017 by Iamhere
	Help with anger? (Preview) Hello all, First just a little bit of info about my situation...I joined this group a few years ago and posted once or twice but went no further.Â Life has been up and down like a roller coaster, as I'm sure you all have experienced.Â I think I've been resistant to finding a local meeting or coming back...	NatalieP	8	624	Aug 1, 2017 by Iamhere
	Tired.... (Preview) Hello MIP family! I read the board every single day, but have not felt the energy to participate. It has been an extremely stressful time, but we have all been there, I know. Since December, we have gone from one medical issue to the next, with my 90 year old mother most recently in the hospital. She is...	El	6	643	Aug 1, 2017 by KT2015
	How important is it? (Preview) I noticed a little while ago that so much of my frustration was due to me not speaking up. It's kind of hard to describe but some of my old behaviour would be to let everything go, tell everyone everything is ok even if it wasn't and then blow up at the smallest thing that went wrong when I couldn't take it an...	KT2015	7	720	Aug 1, 2017 by Bo
	Sister Has Been an Alcoholic for a Decade and Mother Won't Admit it and also Enables (Preview) Hi, I am new here. I wonder if anyone relates or can help. This is a long post, I know. I have an alcoholic sister. She is 33. She drinks daily, has had a DUI, and even been to rehab. She has been one for about a decade now. It hasn't affected my life much until 4 years ago because we've lived in separate places...	septembergirl	4	512	Jul 31, 2017 by Iamhere
	(Not) owning my choices (Preview) Today my ex-abf got bitten pretty badly by our/his cat. He's not castrated, and can become crazy sometimes with no good reason. The good news - I didn't rush to ex-abf's apartment to save the day like I have done so many times before. He asked me to come over and bring him painkillers. He said I was the only...	Aline	7	662	Jul 31, 2017 by Aline
	So who is she really? (Preview) When I first got into the program the ladies in the room use to talk about "Their Qualifier" and/or "Their Alcoholic" I was intrigued until I came to understand that truthfully could not qualify the person who got them into the room as the husband the wanted to be married to and live their lives out wi...	Jerry F	11	661	Jul 31, 2017 by mamalioness
	HOW CAN I POSSIBLY DECIDE THIS??? (Preview) So I have posted before about my prayers to HP to know the truth about my AH. And HP's answers were quick and enlightening. Very quickly after asking HP, I found out my AH was having an affair and kicked him out of our home. I had already had enough of being left home alone while he was out drinking and partyi...	Jayla	31	919	Jul 31, 2017 by Iamhere
	Struggling with Depression and Anxiety in Recovery (Preview) Hi Everyone, I do NOT want to isolate and I need to call or go to a meeting but my father who is my qualifier died 6 months ago and he was very rageful and hurtful to me. We did not really have a proper goodbye and I THOUGHT that I had forgiven him and healed but it opened up flood gates for me. I am in my 50s now a...	Charlotte22	4	619	Jul 31, 2017 by Lyne
	C2C 7/31/17. ODAT (Preview) The reading for today discusses how easily one can become overwhelmed, especially in an alcoholic household. It can be difficult to get organized and know what to do first. But if you can break things down into manageable pieces, that is the idea behind "One Day At A Time." You can even take one task a...	Lyne	5	454	Jul 31, 2017 by El
	ODAT READING 7-30-2017 (Preview) The ODAT reading for today, July 30 (my birthday) is very apropo. The reading asks the question:' what am I going to do with this day"? It points out that the day has so many hours in it and in order to really appreciate it to the fullest we can make a plan to not waste a moment worrying about yesterday nor...	hotrod	11	562	Jul 30, 2017 by El
	Being good enough (Preview) Self doubt and insecurity have leaked into my relationship a little. I get the negative self talk like am I attractive enough for him? Are the women he was with better at...being women really. I feel like I'm a new women. While living with my ex I refused to be a woman. I wouldn't wear make up or get my hair d...	el-cee	7	584	Jul 30, 2017 by mamalioness
	Confronting The Recovering Alcoholic (Preview) I am struggling while the alcoholic I love is in treatment. He relapsed two weeks ago and made the decision to not just detox but to go away and get the help he needs. I am very happy for him as he wouldn't even talk about going away again it was a hot topic. But he did it! The problem is I am struggling with the l...	JDas09	10	713	Jul 30, 2017 by Bo
	Going to burst (Preview) It's been a few months since.i posted last. I swear I like I'm with Dr jackel and mr Hyde. My husband is a train wreck and he knows. The last.of the shenanigans I posted about breaking into my medication lock box and taxing 5 of Ambien and several bubitol asspap caps (benzo for migraine) and drank 1/2 of 1...	Isthisreallife	4	629	Jul 30, 2017 by Iamhere
	Stress, pressure, trying to let go of results. (Preview) I think I have grown as a person over the last five years. Still a bit bull at a gate but not without stopping to think a whole heap more than I used to. I've taken it upon myself to attempt pulling together my wider foo for a cultural matter. I wish I had the solid program of my program idols like Betty no l...	a4l	8	591	Jul 30, 2017 by a4l
	What am I thankful for in the midst of my grief (Preview) Gratitude list might sound "odd" as I grieve the death of my only BIO sister but really it helps me to go ODAT in relative peace I am thankful that my sister is not in pain anymore and who now is whole and in the happy place I am grateful that my health is good and my blood tests came out good Grateful that my o...	mamalioness	1	515	Jul 30, 2017 by Jerry F
	7-29-17 C2C - A Spiritual, Not Religious Program (Preview) Today's page points to AlAnon as a spiritual program in which religious affiliation or belief is not required. It is vital, however, to conceive of and rely on a power greater than ourselves that will bring meaning to our Step work and recovery.It matters not what we call our higher power, for some it h...	Enigmatic	5	656	Jul 29, 2017 by mamalioness
	Just checking in (Preview) Hi everyone!!! I hope this evening finds you all well and at peace..I am doing the ODAT slogan big time...There are times I am "normal" (oh yea! right!) and then like the tides, the grief comes in a wave and I have to let the feelings pass through me... Practicing being in the present helps, AND I am in cha...	mamalioness	2	504	Jul 29, 2017 by hotrod
	God's Will & Acceptance.... (Preview) I am so grateful that I do the best I can to work a program....sometimes, life just 'builds up' - this is my 'dump' ... if you will. I am heading out the door for softball shortly and just need to share... I've spoken before - large family. I am close with all my cousins and we all have families, children, e...	Iamhere	5	585	Jul 29, 2017 by Iamhere
	ODAT READING 7-28 (Preview) Good Morning All. The ODAT reading for today 7-28 speaks about progress in alanon recovery . It notes that progress in the Al-Anon program may appear to be lacking but that if we keep coming back and using the tools, meetings, slogans, steps, sponsors, and daily readings. one day we will find...	hotrod	4	526	Jul 28, 2017 by maryjane
	acceptance (Preview) I'm in a bit of a crisis (self-inflicted) and my sponsor is on vacation. I don't want to bother her. I have a medically complex 8 yo grandson and he is currently in the hospital. I read a FB post on my daughter's page about another child having similar problems and it turned out that the issue was cancer. Th...	usf1970	20	739	Jul 28, 2017 by usf1970
	I think I did the Right Thing (Preview) Was giving a good friend a ride this morning. Eventually during our conversation she asked how my AW has been and was wondering if she was still going to meetings. She said my wife had told her about the addiction and starting AA. I told her that I appreciated her asking but that she would have to ask my wif...	WestMan	14	677	Jul 28, 2017 by shrnp
	C2C (Courage to Change) 7/27/17 (Preview) The reading today is about adopting healthy behaviors to replace adaptive unhealthy behaviors many of us practice before recovery. The writer discusses the suggested closing portion --- "let there be no gossip or criticism of one another." --- and works hard to leave judgmental attitudes out...	Iamhere	7	562	Jul 28, 2017 by 2HP
	It's Been Awhile (Preview) Just wanted to say hello again.It's been awhile since I've been here and it's good to be back. As much as I try to make myself believe that I don't need people,that I can deal with all of this on my own,it's simply a big fat lie.	SoggySlippers	5	488	Jul 28, 2017 by a4l
	Sister died today (Preview) I wrote this on Facebook this morning the doctors told the girls Jane was imminent and they would give her one more morphine to make sure there was no pain They didn't have to drug her..She , when her breathing mask was pulled off, barely fluttered her eyes and she passed away peacefully....Thank you A...	mamalioness	20	4758	Jul 27, 2017 by hotrod
	Weekend Visit .. (Preview) This weekend was the trip back to Illinois and really had a nice time .. it was good to see old friends and watch the kids have fun. I did not see my daughter much as she was out and about with her BFF. I love those kids without question and I feel so badly that they don't have the same relationships here curr...	SerenityRUS	8	498	Jul 27, 2017 by Aline
	I am powerless (Preview) Hi today the concept of powerlessness has been reinforced. I realize I can't control or change what my AH is doing. I feel so disrespected I just don't know how to handle it. My AH uses other things as well and has been leaving things around the house. I don't want to see it, smell it, nothing. I don't want i...	Kmtaylor	5	591	Jul 27, 2017 by Iamhere
	Need advice for relapsing MIL (Preview) Hello, I am new to this forum, and came her specifically for some opinions on the matter of my MIL. My husband and I are expecting our first child in January and had our gender reveal this last weekend. I picked up his mother and brought her to our home, when she got to our home within 15 minutes she could bar...	Ducky	4	467	Jul 26, 2017 by WestMan
	Alcohol, intimacy and ridiculousness (Preview) Hi all. I just need to vent and hopefully get some ESH. My AH and I have been in therapy a month. He admitted to being a 'problem drinker' (right?) in our first session. I have known this for a while and been going to alanon and working the steps one day at a time so I am a baby in recovery. In our third sessi...	BethBethBeth	6	589	Jul 26, 2017 by Iamhere
	The victim routine is killing me. (Preview) It drives me absolutely nuts to deal with a 62 year old professional victim. Everything's so rooted in the past and its just selfish. Everyone has had problems been hurt. Why can't we lock people in a room and slogan them to health?? Grrr. Just a foo vent. I must remind myself, Christopher Robyn didn't t...	a4l	8	590	Jul 26, 2017 by Iamhere
	Step one stories electronically? (Preview) Where i can find al anon book Pathways to recovery electronically?	kadriliisa	3	572	Jul 26, 2017 by kadriliisa
	7-26-17 C2C - Illusion of Control (Preview) The author of today's page addressed the illusions that can limit serenity: The illusion that we can or should control others, and the illusion that the emptiness we feel inside can be filled with something outside of our self. AlAnon suggests that healing begins when we see what we need to heal withi...	Enigmatic	3	604	Jul 26, 2017 by Lyne
	hi i want some support (Preview) i am really weak now , i keep forgiving my boyfriend drunk behavior . up and down . i can love him anymore	Rakiaanan	29	1006	Jul 26, 2017 by Aline
	Gratitude and sanity (Preview) Today I am grateful for my sanity as I know it, work in progress that it is. I'm waist deep with the foo, and its great but there are definite aspects of certifiably insane, literally. Having said that, every generation brings a bit of hope. Makes me wonder how much of mental illness is a fear defense. ...	a4l	5	605	Jul 25, 2017 by a4l
	Hope for Today July 25i h (Preview) Good Morning Everyone- Today's reading is about the defense mechanisms we may learn having grown up or living with alcoholism. The writer specifically mentions how he/she learned to hide from his/her alcoholic parents. Over time the writer learned to hide in obvious ways, and more subtle, such...	yanksfan51	5	489	Jul 25, 2017 by PosiesandPuppies
	The frustration of things piling up that don't get finished! (Preview) I am someone who is a doer. I've always been one to get things done when they need to get done. I'm constantly cleaning the house, doing yardwork, running errands, paying bills. I rarely sit still for 5 minutes when H is at work because that's my time to get things done. Because when he's home he'll make ja...	Mapper	6	670	Jul 25, 2017 by Bo
	letting go (Preview) I'm new here and, I don't know, sort of new to life with an alcoholic/addict. 6 years now. To me it feels more and more like this is my life rather than a bump in the road. My husband of 23 years - someone I've been involved with since we were both in 8th grade (so 33 years now), is addicted to opiates. It st...	kayS	6	686	Jul 25, 2017 by Jerry F
	Feeling inadequate (Preview) I am new to this message though not new to the program. I have gone through so many changes in the last five years that were very necessary for my well being. I am in a safe place and doing okay. But I am having trouble with going to any meetings so this feels safe to me for right now. I work the program as b...	nobody7	13	732	Jul 24, 2017 by Iamhere
	7/24/17 ODAT Newcomer Greetings (Preview) Today's page considers the struggling newcomer to AlAnon, and suggests not overwhelming them further with a flood of advice. A warm welcome, some encouragement and reassurance is suggested. A newcomer's arrival can benefit all as it is an opportunity for them to find relief and hope, and for us to b...	Enigmatic	5	581	Jul 24, 2017 by Aline
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.