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Life Is Short
(Preview)
As a recovering alcoholic and a grateful member of Alanon...I have one question..
Are you going to stay stuck? With hope that things will change?
We all know that unless the practicing alcoholic hits a bottom or realization, of some kind, that absolutely nothing is going to change..
Yet we h...
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Phil
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10
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473
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must get a life
(Preview)
Today has been a long long lonely day. My husband is away for 11 days. My 3 older children are busy with their families and far from here, the weather is cold and rainy, I have eaten way too much and I am trying so hard to understand detach with love from my A son. How will he know I love him, if I stay far a...
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laurab
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5
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312
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Ups & Downs
(Preview)
Hello (((Everyone)))
Downs ... (I'd rather end on a up note)
My birthday was earlier this week it started with this ... I found out I am a prostitute according to my A to his friends, am disowned from a second family in one lifetime, and sold the short sale negoitating rights to my house for 10....
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Jennifer
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3
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255
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A Ray of Hope
(Preview)
Hello Dear Friends,
I was just sitting here thinking this morning about how we just follow along in life sometimes....how easy it is to get so caught up in making everything seem perfect that you can't see what is right in front of you.....get so use to just going along.....we forget how to get on wi...
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Andrea12
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6
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244
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Cried really hard tonight!
(Preview)
I am still greiving over the loss of my friend who "ditched me". I could feel the pain of my mother becoming a drunk and dropping our dear friendship/mother and daughter relationship. As I was crying and asking the Lord why this was happening to me. When I ask Him why my friend deserted me li...
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sensitive1
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4
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299
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Happy Autumn
(Preview)
Having a Higher Power in our life is like being a pumpkin.
He lifts you up, takes you in, and washes all the dirt off of you. He opens you up, touches you deep inside and scoops out all the yucky stuff-- including the seeds of doubt, hate, greed, etc. Then He carves you a new smiling face and pu...
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Maria123
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7
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276
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Today is a good day
(Preview)
Can I just say that today is a good day. I don't have an active alcoholic in my life, and I am not dealing with any adversity. Of course I have my whiney complaints, my life isn't perfect, but HP and this program have given me the gift of some wonderful friends, and the ability to recogn...
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bob6502
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4
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221
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Playing the Victim???
(Preview)
(((Good morning everyone)))
From snowy Colorado. It is pretty. I just wanted to see if anyone had some ESH on the Alcoholic playing the victim, or if that is what this is....
I have been going out almost every night, to an Alanon or AA meeting, because I HAVE to for my sanity. I do...
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hersh
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8
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491
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DO YOU STEER CLEAR OF GETTING OTHERS TO FEEL SORRY FOR YOU?
(Preview)
For years,,,when the insanity of my husbands drinking was progressing, I wanted friends and family to feel sorry for me. Oh woe is me! Sitting on the pity pot waiting for something good to happen. Somebody do something,,somebody stop all of this, somebody help me,,,,,etc,,,etc. Even when I started...
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gardengal
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5
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983
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does it always get worse?
(Preview)
I went away with my a this past weekend to a beach house. just the two of us. He knows when we do things like that there is no point in him drinking, coz if he does there is no point in us having a romantic weekend. And it was beautiful.
He used to drink all the time, thinking it was his only enjoyment.
These...
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arty
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6
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342
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When will it be my party
(Preview)
Well it looks like my plans for the holidays are on hold. I am not working enough to take time off so I will probably be working at the hotel. That will give me some respite. I will go out on the evening of New Years Eve to not have to deal with the fireworks. The bangs and the bombs and what...
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maresie2
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2
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360
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Let 'em whirl!
(Preview)
An old Arab, whose tent was pitched next to a company of whirling dervishes was asked, "Don't they bother you?" "No!" was his answer. "What do you do about them?" "I let them whirl."
Wouldn't that be easier? Instead of trying to control a whirlwind?
Probably any one of us can get along with pe...
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greta
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4
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3726
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I Want to Let Go, He Won't
(Preview)
In Jan. of 2004, my drunk AH and I were in our home, he became belligerant, and gesturing his arms around wildly, and hit me in the nose. What followed is greater than my greatest nightmare ever was.
I already have PTSSD, so everything was magnified. I wtnt o his mother's who took m...
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Becky1
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11
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295
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Happy Birthday JrtJosey!!
(Preview)
Hey (((((((((Josey)))))))))) Happy Birthday! Hope you have a wonderful wonderful day!!
Luv ya!!
Kis
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kismetstrand
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12
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404
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a new beginning (lovette)
(Preview)
Today is another new day. For a really long time I was focused on new beginnings needing to be some grand large change or shift. I am in the middle of a divorce right now and my daughters and I moved into our new apt on Wednesday. That is a big change, a big shift. What occurs to me that through these past few mo...
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sparkette
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5
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364
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lies! so much lying...why?
(Preview)
I don't understand all the lies - why? Not lies to cover up drinking - he is not actively drinking right now - but lies about so many other things - whether he is going to AA meetings, if he called - we started out the relationship with deceit - he told me so many things which were untrue - broke the trus...
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twinkie
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5
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395
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MIP Board Technical Question
(Preview)
Is there a way already, or would it be possible, to include a feature on the board where any user can see only the posts that they have posted (authored or posted within)?
Thanks.
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Noni
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1
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257
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Tiring and Weird Week
(Preview)
Just got home from walmart. Poor me! (I LOVE Walmart!)
Hubby is in his usual place, across the street, helping decorate for a Halloween party tomorrow night. His friends. I'm going to my friends party while he goes to his. This is different for us, we usually go together w...
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Becky1
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1
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208
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so hard to detach
(Preview)
I have to bite my tongue and need some detachment. My A just had a major relapse a few months ago - he went on a 12 day binge - his mother rescued him, took him to the hospital, cleaned up his apartment, etc etc. (enabler!) I moved out. As a result of his relapse his son's mother filed a cus...
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twinkie
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2
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287
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I haven't phoned in 24 hours
(Preview)
I haven't spoken to my son in over 24 hours. I don't know where he is, if he still has his job, or if he is sober today. I know the 3 Cs. I know that if I call him and all I hear is terrible stuff, I will be miserable all night. I know what I have to do for myself, meetings, detach etc. But all I want is to know that he is...
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laurab
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3
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331
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Friday Gratitude List....
(Preview)
((((Happy Friday))) Everyone...
Thought I would share a gratitude list - a lady at a meeting the other night said that she recited one in her head from A-Z so she could sleep at night... what a great idea! I did it last night and it actually worked.
A- Alanon and AA
B - Birds, breathing
C - Co...
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hersh
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6
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241
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feeling guilt from a mall trip
(Preview)
I went to the mall with my daughter today .
My dry A got mad I spent money on as my A says " junk". I bought her a necklace a pencil holder that had 4 things in it. and 2 lip glossess.
We had a nice time together. Im having trouble letting go of guilt i dont deserve.
Then my dry A says when home then im g...
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purplebutterfly
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3
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208
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Raging about Alcohol
(Preview)
I posted earlier about how my husband burned his camo sweatshirt jacket that I had worn. I used to always try to be nice about things, and try to smooth things over with him, but ever since I went off my antidepressants, I have just cut loose. It may be a good thing, or not. Hard to say. B...
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Becky1
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5
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335
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IRRATIONAL THINKING NOT SOLELY A CHARACTERISTIC OF ALCOHOLICS
(Preview)
I have severe nearsightedness. Several years before my father died, he offered me $6000 to have the operation to get my eyes fixed. I was surprised by the offer, but declined it right away. Anyway, I was sort of touched by my fath...
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athena12
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3
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326
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dry A craziness
(Preview)
I'm proably asking a crazy question.
Why is that my dry A has all these wild things that I may be doing and im not doing it.
I dont like being accused of things i havent done.
ie--- said saw me sneak "my money" to my daughter. (which didnt happen)
saying i sent someone pics i didn't
Its driv...
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purplebutterfly
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5
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336
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On from here with optimism
(Preview)
Talked to the A just now and he was happy and calm and I caught myself getting a little upset. I was so stressed out last night in large part because of his words and now today it's like nothing ever happened. He is better and I am still holding a grudge. ERRRRRRR!!!!
I would like to tu...
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carolinagirl
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1
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320
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My mom is visiting
(Preview)
My mom is here, visiting from out of town. She's making me my favorite dinner tonight. She and I will go tommorrow to visit my daughter at her rehab facility. Daughter is off restriction so we will see a matinee, have dinner, pretty good chance we'll end up at Walmart.
I have really leaned on my m...
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kabbie
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2
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182
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New Job?
(Preview)
Well I went on my ride along yesterday. It seems as the job will fit me very nicely. I can only find one draw back and that is the time I would be done. I got home around 8:30. Of course my A and 15 yr old had an argument before I was home and the 15 yr old called my cell phone. On m...
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marmare
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4
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183
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Feeling worthless!
(Preview)
Hi everyone! As some of you know I am new to here! I am also new to this. First I would like to express how I got here. Well I am seeing a counselor bout self esteem issues. On my second session she advised me to check out Al anon groups here locally. Well I do have to admit I am very shy to that so I thought I woul...
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sensitive1
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7
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425
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I went to an AlAnon meeting
(Preview)
I went to my first AlAnon meeting last night. It was very kind and loving and gracious and welcoming. But, I felt like my life is a nightmare of waiting for the next phone call police car jail blackout coke deal loss tears etc, while everyone there was so calm and optimistic. I of course realize tha...
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laurab
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7
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312
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Grateful
(Preview)
Just wanted to take a minute and speak to the positive side of recovery.
At 37 days sober, my daughter is saying please and thank you, asking about family members, telling me to drive carefully in bad weather, hugging and holding hands with her dad and I, taking NO for an answer, sharing her feelings....
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kabbie
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3
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178
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Where is
(Preview)
the photo page?
we have one don't we? thanks love,debilyn
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debilyn
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2
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278
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I am confused...
(Preview)
Dear ALL,
Hello. I am new to this site,new to Al-Anon and trying to find the new me...being the daughter of a drug addict and not too long married to an A without knowing it from day one makes me feel lost with mixed feelings and low self confident...I feel I am living my mother's life and it bother...
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Newme
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3
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220
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to everyone who responded to my post
(Preview)
i want to thank the few people who sent prayers and kind words,to me after the death of my dear father in law..it has been a rough month few weeks..first off i went on my cruise oct 8,on oct 9 my daughter who is 7 and half months pregnant went into premature,and was in the hospital for 2 days she is now on semi b...
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bev
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2
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309
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Taking advil PM to relax.... HELP!
(Preview)
Hi again. I wanted to share my story. My user name says it all... I am sensitive. VERY sensitive. As is my mother who is the alcholic in the family. She was bout 10 years older than I when she started to drink. (I am 32) and she was really upset bout work and then thought the booze would he...
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sensitive1
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7
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1364
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Miserable Day!
(Preview)
Today has been the worst day! My A came over last weekend and I believe he drank my son's codeine cough syrup and then watered it down. It was the consistency of honey and now it's like water. I am tired of questioning myself. He has every possible story in the book and swears up and down he didn't do it and I s...
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carolinagirl
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5
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230
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Perspective
(Preview)
Ok so last night was a miserable night. Today is better.
Last night I talked to my neice who is 20 and told her about the cough syrup dilemma. She just kept saying that she couldn't believe that he would steal medicine from a baby. I don't know why I found that amusing. I didn't even care that he took it I...
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carolinagirl
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1
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184
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Family members can untangle from a loved one's addiction
(Preview)
"I loved my husband. I thought I couldn't live without him," said Nancy L. "But I also hated him. I hated that he wasn't the husband or father I knew he could be."
At first, Nancy didn't recognize that her husband was drinking heavily and using marijuana and cocaine. However, she realiz...
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Phil
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1
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389
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Maybe Some Do Have a Reason
(Preview)
I have been reading all of the postings about how the A's always seem to have an excuse or a reason to drink. Most of them sound fairly absurd - and really are just excuses. My AW has never said why she feels like she has to drink, but I have a suspicion that I might know one of the main reasons.
...
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Juster
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6
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416
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Difference of Letting Go vs. Giving up
(Preview)
I came across this analogy of Letting Go vs. Giving up and thought I'd share.
In Thailand, they trap monkeys by tethering a coconut shell to a stake in the ground. They cut a hole in the shell just big enough for a monkey's hand and then put a piece of fruit in the shell. Then they hide and wait. A monkey w...
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Christy
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2
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333
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I almost died tonight
(Preview)
Yes,I was in a horrible car accident today at about 605pm.It was the scariest thing that has ever ever happened to me. I literally saw my life flash right before my eyes.
Ok I was getting onto the fwy and there was a red light as I got on I saw a puddle of water from a nearby sprinkler I went over the water and...
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Lauren ashley
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18
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534
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Nov AlAnon convention in NH, AA w/AlAnon in MA - anyone going?
(Preview)
Anyone planning on attending either the AlAnon convention in Nashua NH? or the AA w/AlAnon convention in Framingham MA this Nov? Havent heard too much about it. Havent heard about it in my f2f either
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Barbara
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2
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257
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Boy Scouting and Booze
(Preview)
((((Everyone))))
I survived the camp out ...and so did my program. I sit here and shake my head in unbelief, it was wonderful, insane, joyful, sickening and pleasant -- talk about a rollercoaster. Ah well, I learned a lot and have been wondering what my HP was trying to show me.
...
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Lunamoth
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8
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410
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Filing Charges against my husband
(Preview)
Hello Dear Friends,
Well it is 3:30 in the morning and I just can't sleep....so much has happened these past few days.....I am finding things out that my husband did to me every day...and it is not a good thing....
To date, I have received 3 letters from magistrates, he stole my check book and so...
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Andrea12
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14
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472
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Isabela??? Or.arty???
(Preview)
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debilyn
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2
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201
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farewell party
(Preview)
Well my Ah is away for one week and instead of spending his last night home with me he was out till 4 am at our local bar. Up and left without a word. Will have to work hard on my own program not to sit on the pity pot too long. Hard not to feel bad since he had been trying so hard to control his d...
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Elizabeth M
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2
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223
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What is going on with me?
(Preview)
A while back somebody posted questions that they had learned to ask themself. I found this an excellent source to use during times of confusion.
So what is going on with me?
I'm trapped between having the need to feel hurt but at the same time know that good can come from this situation. ...
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Cilla
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1
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308
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HP is talking...am I listening?
(Preview)
Absolutely!!!
3 things in the past couple of weeks have been on my mind with regard to taking care of myself.
1) Losing weight
I have been trying to decide about a program that I used to do online. It is based on
a book called "Potatoes Not Prozac". It is for healing addiction with nutritio...
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Gailey
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1
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207
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being accused
(Preview)
I am tired of my A accusing me of lying and haveing an internet affair. saying im doing things i havent dont.
Im losing my mind. I deep down wanna leave but am scared and afraid.
IM so ashamed of me.
I do nothing and im no good.
I do all the house chores etc
says i give my daughter money when i d...
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purplebutterfly
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6
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228
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Boundaries Boundaries Boundaries
(Preview)
On top of the A who collects chaos by the second, I also have to deal with a dysfunctional workplace.
I work in a corporation and they tend to hire college age kids who don't have work experience. They then sort of train them by immersion. I work part time in 2 locations stepping in for the m...
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maresie2
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3
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204
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What would you do?
(Preview)
Hi all,
Have a question. I have never given birth to a child. Have raised one and I know I would go to the ends of the earth for her. I can't imagine how things would be for a child I had carried and birthed.
So, here is my question. My A stepdaughter has been in trouble more tha...
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lilms
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8
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291
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I'm so scared. I need courage.
(Preview)
I'm new.
My A is my 29 year old son. Finally after 6 years of my enabling in every way I could, thousands of dollars, police, lawyers, smashed cars and no real consequences, he is up against it alone. I hope it is the bottom, but I'm not certain. His wife is gone. He lost his house. He has no money. He...
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laurab
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8
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514
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Well... probably no better time to work on my 4th
(Preview)
((((Everyone))))
Since our seperation a scant 5 days ago, there has been panic attacks about being alone, threats of suicide, tears and begging to just work out her sobriety together and finally she has already said she is getting to not want to come home and wants the number to our EAP so she can cont...
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rtexas
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7
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349
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MIP cookbooks...
(Preview)
Just wondered, any news about the cookbooks? Maybe I missed it on the board...
Thanks,
Kathi
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lmt123
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1
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194
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Interview
(Preview)
Okay it was a wonderful interview!!! I WOWED him!!! I have a ride along tomorrow and an interview after that to see if this is what I want to do and if they want me!!!!
Hugs Mary -- Edited by marmare at 21:14, 2006-10-25
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marmare
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9
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268
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I need to share this..
(Preview)
My daughter was critically injured in a car accident. Her best friend was killed and my daughter and another friend were in bed, wheelchairs, cruthes, surgeries for over 2 1/2 years. Physically my daughter can now walk and is doing ok. Looking back i suspect that she became addic...
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greta
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7
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391
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LIVING A LIE
(Preview)
Hi Roomies
I don't quite know how to start this, so I will just be Ally, and come right out with it. Someone came into the chat room the other night and said "the acoa meeting is just about to start, is anyone comming in. So the chat room was quiet, and I went in. I had been in a few times already before, I list...
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ally
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10
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510
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laurab----private message
(Preview)
I sent you a private message. you can retrieve that by looking at the top of the index page.
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Gailey
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0
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207
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barely there
(Preview)
i was dealing pretty good with my hub an A. Was going back to school, figured if he works out his end, we' d have a good life. He increasely drank more each year of 18 years together. 2 kids. 2 dogs. Last 2 weeks I found out he cheated on me. He was so drunk & telling someone on th...
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DeAnna
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5
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225
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In a funky mood today
(Preview)
Woke up this morning in a great mood. Went to work I got an email from my A first thing this morning, so I was feeling a little vunerable. Then a little while later I got a call from mom asked me to go to lunch so I said sure that would be fun. My mom and I have a strange re...
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DoN4me
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5
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236
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