Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Jill · Jill

help! something so trivial has robbed me of my day. I am reacting to minor day to day irritations at work - it's really embarassing to react to them but today they add up to to much. well from there it spiralled into other topics and by the time I reached my office I was not my highest self. I spent the day tryi...

lynnMat · lynnMat

I posted my dilemma about my husband who is an A and didn't stop drinking even after my daughter was born. Last night we got into an arguement and I locked my bedroom door. He has never been violent in the past, but he tried to storm into the room and when he found out that it was locked, he kicked in the door...

marmare · marmare

My daughter in-law is home. We have had to jump through many hoops to get assitance with her perscriptions. One perscription is $1200!!! Her medicade did not follow her from GA because medicade is state...so no insurance (my son is union but his medical doesn't start for 30 or 60 days...I made lots o...

omajoy · omajoy

I read two posts this morning where the action mentioned to get rid of the A was to "send him home to his mom". I know this is just desperation talking to get rid of him. Moms can't handle your A any better than you can. If she could, she would have by now. She didn't cause it, she can't contro...

Hopeless in AZ · Hopeless in AZ

Hello All, I haven't been here in a while, but I'm back for some thoughts and advice. The Alcoholic in my life is my dad. He's drank my entire life (I'm 27), and after almost 30 years of marriage my mom finally left my dad early this year. She just packed her and my little brother's things one day after o...

lynnMat · lynnMat

this is my first post. i grew up with an alcoholic father and ended up marrying an A too. he's a doctor and drinks 1-2 bottles of wine after work. he promised to quit after we had our baby, about a year ago, but the drinking and isolation in his home office has continued. I used to drink occ. but was neve...

ddub · ddub

I am so frustrated with the levels of acceptance there are. I had compassion for awhile but now I am having a temper tantrum (in my head) because I want to change things I cannot change. I have to accept my fantasy is not reality - fine, phooey!! Not much is going to change but me......at least there is t...

Heartbroken · Heartbroken

A Letter to my daughter/son My dear child It is never too late, I am told for anything, but sometimes it is too little just to admit that I was not a good mother during your formative years. However, I am attempting to say I am so sorry. For not being there when you needed me to beFor shouting at you [althoug...

maresie2 · maresie2

The holidays are a tough time for me. From day one on the holidays the A never did take me into consideraiton. Back in the day when we had money I once arranged a wonderful vacation for us. I have made all kinds of excuses but basically he allowed his addiction to ruin the holiday. I had my own issues around m...

spirit · spirit

Hi, I am living with an alcholic and at times it is not good. The verbal assalts are so rough, I find myself apoligizing for things that i didnt do and i fear the abandonment due to childhood stuff. This weekend I was really not good but I found comfort and people to talk with in the chat room here at alanon. T...

Kerowyn · Kerowyn

I was coming on here regularly for a while - right about the time that I realized that the A in my life (live-in bf) was really an alcoholic and out of control. RIght now I'm just venting - and breathing a sigh of relief. We lived together for about a year and 4 days. WOW!! Many episodes transpired, car a...

klm4446 · klm4446

I have not been to board for about 2 mos. Was feeling stronger and very busy with kids but seem to have crashed again recently. Just got the police report back on my BF's 8/1 fatal DUI crash. Blood alcohol was .23. Still having incredible guilt that I did not hear him leave the house that night or fores...

startingtoseethelight · startingtoseethelight

AH and I both had meltdowns Friday night. He'd lost his 3rd job this year and I told him when he started it that when this job is over so are we. When I left for work Friday morning I told him we needed to talk when I get home about splitting up. He took the opportunity to hit the bar and get drunk. He left me a...

RainyJamie · RainyJamie

I gotta make it so that if the AH screws everything up, I don't get screwed up right along it. Sometimes I have to reword things so that they will sink in. Maybe I just need to cover my ears with my hands and sing: (to the tune of "figaro") not my problem not my problem not my problem I actually feel...

maresie2 · maresie2

As you all know I really sweated to get the current job I have now which is a pretty long commute from my house. I leave my house at 6:00 a.m and rarely get back to the house till 7:00 p.m Then I often do another 2 hours or so at the 2nd job on top of that. I've been putting feelers out for a better job for a while. I d...

omajoy · omajoy

I have spent my entire life being a helpful, compassionate person. Most of the time those with whom I have a relationship return that to me. I have no experience with being hated. Now my worst case scenario has happened. Last night my ex DIL came to pick up the grandbaby as she does each day; my husband and...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I took a second job delivering pizzas for Dominos (don't freak out Diva :) so now I am working an insane amount and trying to figure out if I can really balance all this. I worked the last two days on my days off from the regular job which I am at now. I will probably be working nights from 7-9 during the week...

Godsgrl · Godsgrl

My hubby is a drug user and an occasional drinker. He got drunk this last weekend and became very verbal abusive (again) I've had enough so I've decided to kick him out. He is playing on my heartstring and I feel lower than a snakes belly right now. He says where will I go? I have no place to stay. I want to yel...

Heartbroken · Heartbroken

This is how I feel. If I sleep my brain won't hurt! I have worked on Step 4 for a couple of hours looking at my inventory. And I simply do not know what to do with it. It seems like I will NEVER ever get past this step as I simply have too much to put right. I just do not know what to do next. ...

lin0606 · lin0606

I've got a difficult situation to deal with, and I'd like some input on the alanon perspective. It's a long story, but I'd like to lay it out to get it straight in my own mind. My husband's younger sister was a world traveller in her youth, moved back to their home city about 20 years ago, pregnant and sing...

maresie2 · maresie2

I find I am having to confront another fantasy here. I did not want to leave the A because I had this fantasy about he would at some point change. I've been gone 6 months now, if anything he is worse than he has ever been. Now I find I am confronting another fantasy that I would fall on my feet and not have to wor...

omajoy · omajoy

I have written three posts tonight trying to unload my grief and hopelessness. I have deleted them and have decided that perhaps I try too hard. Perhaps it is best to shut the heck up and take what has been dealt to me. I have lost my little family to alcohol and divorce. I have lost the great relationship I...

Lauren ashley · Lauren ashley

Sometimes people come into your life and you know right away that they were meant to be there: they serve some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson or help figure out who you are or who you want to become. You never know who these people may be: your roommate, neighbor, professor, long-lost friend, lover o...

serenity62 · serenity62

MIP November business meeting: November 11/07 Chair opened meeting with the Serenity Prayer, 1st thing on agenda is OP schedule, which was posted along with a description of the requirements to be an OP. October Minutes were approved as written. Treasury report was given by dot: She reported t...

Positivelydee · Positivelydee

Okay, I am fortunate enough to have a "long" weekend in that I don't have work tomorrow (veteran's day) ... My intention was to work (finish) my step 4 Ahhhh intentions I have been working on (or I usually say "procrastinating on") Step 4 since JUNE I keep getting "stuck&qu...

islu1953 · islu1953

my dad is an alcholic. he has been for a couple years now. he stopped for a couple weeks when my mom gave him the ultimatum. i came home tonight, and he started again. i should be used to it by now, but everytime he starts up again i am just so hurt and angry. my mom wants to leave him- but cant, because of us, &qu...

cookie1971 · cookie1971

Well the AH hasn't had a drink for 3 days. But he's driving me insane. He wants to argue with me every minute of every day. I haven't been returning his arguments until today. I just lost it. The argument was over something stupid and I just went nuts. Usually I can busy myself with housework or something a...

Christy · Christy

Loupiness · Loupiness

It never ceases to amaze me how my ah can turn anything and everything into blame on my part. Somehow, I think many of you can relate! Some background - ah has been out of house for 6 mos. He sees the kids a lot, but not on a regular schedule; mostly when convenient for him, but at least 5-6 times a week. Has ha...

RainyJamie · RainyJamie

AH was real drunk and I sneaky asked about the court summons he got in the paper. He told me it was for open container and that his drivers liscence has been suspended. It is very likely that he will not remember telling me this. My mind is still processing this information. But I can say, he is the only one w...

Belladay · Belladay

Updating my last post: I passed! It was so awesome! I mean the test was really hard but I gave it all I had, took over two hours. I checked and rechecked and then turned it in. I had to check online from my desk at work and when I read I passed I was just so relieved. Everyone at work crowded around and we just che...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((((((Family))))), Just wanted to take the time to thank all the veterans today. My Dad, Uncles and Grandfathers were all vets. Hubby was in the Navy too and I have many friends who are still serving. Thank you for your service. To all those out there serving thank you too. To the families, th...

nmike · nmike

My AHsober that moved out 2 years ago said he would come over this weekend to help me with wood, fixing things up, etc. I have tried to get anyone to help me with those things particularly after my shoulder surgery. He always says "do you want me to come over?" I say "what do you want to do?&...

Heather72 · Heather72

On the way to work one morning, my daughter told me that Daddy hurt her. When I asked where, she pointed to it. As you can imagine, the worst fear that a mother could have was realized. I contacted her doctor, spoke with my AHs court therapist and now the Court Judge is aware of the situatio...

ke2 · ke2

I am new to thos board and so glad to have found it. My mother is an alcoholic and has been for the last 15 years. She goes through brief phases of sobriety. I am getting married next year. My mom and I were meant to go wedding dress shopping together a few weeks ago. She promised she would be sober. I turned u...

Positivelydee · Positivelydee

Hi all ~ I just need to vent ~ As most of you know, I had to put my precious cat, Buster Boy, down this past Thursday morning. It was the hardest thing my husband and I hever had to do - he was our baby with fur and a very big part of our lives and who we had become. Crazy as that may sound to some. The "firsts&...

Jean4444 · Jean4444

I asked a woman to sponsor me. She said she would. She said she wanted me to call her once a week. I said I thought I could do that and then did not. I apologized and said I wanted to try this again she said OK and now I do not call her, still. I have such a hard time reaching out. I cannot imagine bothering someo...

serendipity · serendipity

I've been watching tv since 8. All 3 shows have had drugs/alcohol story lines. Is this because of the writer's strike? Are they recruting alanon members to write the story lines?LOL! One was a dad trying to keep his sons from the lifestyle of drugs and gangs. The second one character found her husband'...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((((((((Family))))))), GOOD MORNING! Just wanted to officially document the first snowfall of the season here in NY! I'm so excited I can't stand it! While I can't make snow people yet or snowballs, it's truly beautiful. After a long tough week of work, I have a rare Saturday off, and lo and...

Positivelydee · Positivelydee

As many of you know, I had to put my precious Buster Cat to rest the other day and boy does this house feel EMPTY. The tears just keep flowing We decided to have Buster cremated and to receive his ashes back in an urn and we intend on doing a memorial of sorts ~ so ~ here is what I am looking for... There is a poem c...

Kim65 · Kim65

Help me put two and two together here . . . maybe it will equal ZERO and I'm imagining things, which is fine by me, I don't need the trouble! Yesterday mutual friends of exA and I brought over a cord of pine rounds for firewood. This was unannounced, as the puppies had chewed through my phone cord (again)....

sadako · sadako

my (sober) A is throwing a fit tonight, not directing it at me but he broke a glass bowl, called someone and swore them out at 10:30pm, then kicked the phone across the room. before that, he'd gone out way before dinner, stayed out til 10, didn't tell me when he'd be back, i was worried he'd run out of gas or s...

nycbt · nycbt

I found out that my husband was using herion again. I found out the other day that he was using when we went to the emergency room. He has been going to the meeting yesterday is when he started. I am hanging in there. I going to try and go to my meeting for face to face tonight. He is now taking a drug to help him...

elikapika · elikapika

Let me begin by introducing myself. I am a young mother of 2 little girls, and married to an alcoholic, drug user. My husband started AA in 2001, he did very well for his first year, he still has not had a drink since. He is also a drug user and has been for many years. He is not a constant user but has been caugh...

shimo · shimo

Please check for a private message. Thank you.

verenda · verenda

Hi everyone If you have read my topics you know that I have let my AH come back home. Now I am starting to regret my decision. Here is why and please tell me if I am being unreasonable or if he is reverting back to old abusive behaviors. It feels like the latter to me. Some background, my Ah was very emotionall...

RainyJamie · RainyJamie

AH opened a letter, his face fell and he quietly walked to where (he thought) I couldn't see him. "What is it?" I say, being nosy "oh, it's nothing" he says, with his back to me. "I got a ticket a while ago, and now I have to go to court" "What kind of a ticket?" I c...

LocoMotions · LocoMotions

I know AA has helped countless people, BUT has anyone else here seen an A use it as an excuse to drink? My AH attributes his "mess ups" to the fact that he can't control himself and that it's a disease, which he says comes from AA. He has made a profession out of being an alcoholic. He started dr...

Heartbroken · Heartbroken

Good morning everyone, It's me again. Trying to work on a self preservation recipe. Why? Well further to my inventory of myself, as required when one reaches Step 4 - "Make a searching and fearless moral inventory of self." - it all seems to be too late for me. I needed to do this twenty yea...

anahera · anahera

My husband is an alcoholic and I am a non-drinking non-alcoholic. Our experience of alcoholism seems to differ markedly in a couple of respects from all the stories we've come across (both online and in AA / Al-Anon meetings and literature). After 5 years of married hell I put myself through a recov...

New member-trying to figure this all out · Tree

I just joined and Thank you for the FAQ's they were helpful. I stumbled apon this website tonight in hopes of finding a chat for al anon. I have not really became a member of any al anon meetings in my town yet, but I did sit in on one but I was late so no one knew I was a newcomer. My husband is an alcoholic, we...

marmare · marmare

I am on my way to take my daughter in-law to hospital ER. She is the one with Cysic Fibrosis. Please say a prayer for her and the family. Last March she was given just 1 year. Hugs Mary

kissers · kissers

Hi everyone, I am beside myself. I am so full of anger right now. I got screwed over at work and did not receive my bonus. Everyone received their bonus, but me. I am also the only female. I'm starting to notice how oppressive the work environment is and I want to run away screaming. I am praying for HP to hel...

canadianguy · canadianguy

Hi everyone.... there has been a lot of discussion recently about the posting of religious statements/sentiments on this board, and what is appropriate, etc. Like many things, the answer isn't totally black & white, but I really think the summary below, which I posted (as a reprint) a few day...

canadianguy · canadianguy

It's often easy to fall into that "pity party" about how life isn't fair to us, particularly regarding our circumstances around addictions, etc... I laughed today at this quote, and thought it might bring a few smiles to you as well. Tom Expecting the world to treat you fairlyBecause y...

Lunamoth · Lunamoth

(((Everyone)))) My A has had some kind of awakening. He is so remorseful ..... about everything. Only he wants to forget everything that has happened over the last three yrs since he's left us. I'm about to lose my mind. He's here constantly, pushing, wanting me to say that everything is going to be...

david62 · david62

Hello ((((Family))))) This Sunday is our monthly business/group conscious meeting. The meeting will be at 8pm cst As of this time we dont have much on the agenda, if anyone has an item they would like to have considered for discussion, please send me a pm by tomorrow (Saturday) evening. Thanks! and Se...

babysteps · babysteps

I finally blew up at my AH last Friday. He had 34 days of sobriety that ended on 9/23, followed by about 34 days of chronic drinking. He was pulled over a week ago Wednesday and almost got a dui. If freaked him out but he came home drunk on Thursday. On Friday my check was rejected at Wal Mart because he kept ta...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Today is going by REALLY REALLY slow! I just want it to be over. I'd like to sleep for the next week and not feel this! My lungs feel tight and I know if I had a cigarette they would open up, how ironic is that? I have been totally tired and antsy alternating all day. I know the coughing will start tomorro...

david62 · david62

Al-anon is a program which is supposed to be spread through attraction rather than promotion. How do we do this? We live our lives in a manner that might cause another person to look at us and wonder how do they live their life with so much peace, serenity, joy, happiness, kindness, tolerance, consid...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	need ESH on resenting (Preview) help! something so trivial has robbed me of my day. I am reacting to minor day to day irritations at work - it's really embarassing to react to them but today they add up to to much. well from there it spiralled into other topics and by the time I reached my office I was not my highest self. I spent the day tryi...	Jill	5	825	Nov 16, 2007 by Jill
	so upset i can't eat (Preview) I posted my dilemma about my husband who is an A and didn't stop drinking even after my daughter was born. Last night we got into an arguement and I locked my bedroom door. He has never been violent in the past, but he tried to storm into the room and when he found out that it was locked, he kicked in the door...	lynnMat	2	474	Nov 16, 2007 by debilyn
	Daughter in-law update (Preview) My daughter in-law is home. We have had to jump through many hoops to get assitance with her perscriptions. One perscription is $1200!!! Her medicade did not follow her from GA because medicade is state...so no insurance (my son is union but his medical doesn't start for 30 or 60 days...I made lots o...	marmare	4	459	Nov 16, 2007 by belle1
	sending the A home to mom (Preview) I read two posts this morning where the action mentioned to get rid of the A was to "send him home to his mom". I know this is just desperation talking to get rid of him. Moms can't handle your A any better than you can. If she could, she would have by now. She didn't cause it, she can't contro...	omajoy	3	562	Nov 16, 2007 by lilms
	How do you prepare yourself? (Preview) Hello All, I haven't been here in a while, but I'm back for some thoughts and advice. The Alcoholic in my life is my dad. He's drank my entire life (I'm 27), and after almost 30 years of marriage my mom finally left my dad early this year. She just packed her and my little brother's things one day after o...	Hopeless in AZ	9	621	Nov 16, 2007 by Jeff Reynolds
	beginning phases (Preview) this is my first post. i grew up with an alcoholic father and ended up marrying an A too. he's a doctor and drinks 1-2 bottles of wine after work. he promised to quit after we had our baby, about a year ago, but the drinking and isolation in his home office has continued. I used to drink occ. but was neve...	lynnMat	3	600	Nov 16, 2007 by carolinagirl
	Acceptance (Preview) I am so frustrated with the levels of acceptance there are. I had compassion for awhile but now I am having a temper tantrum (in my head) because I want to change things I cannot change. I have to accept my fantasy is not reality - fine, phooey!! Not much is going to change but me......at least there is t...	ddub	2	412	Nov 15, 2007 by nmike
	Unconditional apology... (Preview) A Letter to my daughter/son My dear child It is never too late, I am told for anything, but sometimes it is too little just to admit that I was not a good mother during your formative years. However, I am attempting to say I am so sorry. For not being there when you needed me to beFor shouting at you [althoug...	Heartbroken	2	680	Nov 15, 2007 by Positivelydee
	Grief the holidays (Preview) The holidays are a tough time for me. From day one on the holidays the A never did take me into consideraiton. Back in the day when we had money I once arranged a wonderful vacation for us. I have made all kinds of excuses but basically he allowed his addiction to ruin the holiday. I had my own issues around m...	maresie2	1	444	Nov 15, 2007 by Positivelydee
	Thank you everyone in Chat room (Preview) Hi, I am living with an alcholic and at times it is not good. The verbal assalts are so rough, I find myself apoligizing for things that i didnt do and i fear the abandonment due to childhood stuff. This weekend I was really not good but I found comfort and people to talk with in the chat room here at alanon. T...	spirit	3	496	Nov 15, 2007 by spirit
	Finally had it (Preview) I was coming on here regularly for a while - right about the time that I realized that the A in my life (live-in bf) was really an alcoholic and out of control. RIght now I'm just venting - and breathing a sigh of relief. We lived together for about a year and 4 days. WOW!! Many episodes transpired, car a...	Kerowyn	3	379	Nov 15, 2007 by Kim65
	3 months later (Preview) I have not been to board for about 2 mos. Was feeling stronger and very busy with kids but seem to have crashed again recently. Just got the police report back on my BF's 8/1 fatal DUI crash. Blood alcohol was .23. Still having incredible guilt that I did not hear him leave the house that night or fores...	klm4446	6	549	Nov 15, 2007 by maresie2
	Glad I found you (Preview) AH and I both had meltdowns Friday night. He'd lost his 3rd job this year and I told him when he started it that when this job is over so are we. When I left for work Friday morning I told him we needed to talk when I get home about splitting up. He took the opportunity to hit the bar and get drunk. He left me a...	startingtoseethelight	3	548	Nov 15, 2007 by Kerowyn
	self help (Preview) I gotta make it so that if the AH screws everything up, I don't get screwed up right along it. Sometimes I have to reword things so that they will sink in. Maybe I just need to cover my ears with my hands and sing: (to the tune of "figaro") not my problem not my problem not my problem I actually feel...	RainyJamie	2	411	Nov 15, 2007 by canadianguy
	hard times and more hard times (Preview) As you all know I really sweated to get the current job I have now which is a pretty long commute from my house. I leave my house at 6:00 a.m and rarely get back to the house till 7:00 p.m Then I often do another 2 hours or so at the 2nd job on top of that. I've been putting feelers out for a better job for a while. I d...	maresie2	4	637	Nov 15, 2007 by maire rua
	worst case scenario reality (Preview) I have spent my entire life being a helpful, compassionate person. Most of the time those with whom I have a relationship return that to me. I have no experience with being hated. Now my worst case scenario has happened. Last night my ex DIL came to pick up the grandbaby as she does each day; my husband and...	omajoy	9	673	Nov 15, 2007 by DD
	Second Job and MAMA guilt (Preview) I took a second job delivering pizzas for Dominos (don't freak out Diva :) so now I am working an insane amount and trying to figure out if I can really balance all this. I worked the last two days on my days off from the regular job which I am at now. I will probably be working nights from 7-9 during the week...	carolinagirl	3	611	Nov 14, 2007 by maresie2
	New here (Preview) My hubby is a drug user and an occasional drinker. He got drunk this last weekend and became very verbal abusive (again) I've had enough so I've decided to kick him out. He is playing on my heartstring and I feel lower than a snakes belly right now. He says where will I go? I have no place to stay. I want to yel...	Godsgrl	2	493	Nov 14, 2007 by Kim65
	My brain hurts ... I just do not know what to do next! (Preview) This is how I feel. If I sleep my brain won't hurt! I have worked on Step 4 for a couple of hours looking at my inventory. And I simply do not know what to do with it. It seems like I will NEVER ever get past this step as I simply have too much to put right. I just do not know what to do next. ...	Heartbroken	11	784	Nov 14, 2007 by barisax
	Help me Clarify my Thoughts (Preview) I've got a difficult situation to deal with, and I'd like some input on the alanon perspective. It's a long story, but I'd like to lay it out to get it straight in my own mind. My husband's younger sister was a world traveller in her youth, moved back to their home city about 20 years ago, pregnant and sing...	lin0606	8	699	Nov 14, 2007 by greta
	slogging through molaases (Preview) I find I am having to confront another fantasy here. I did not want to leave the A because I had this fantasy about he would at some point change. I've been gone 6 months now, if anything he is worse than he has ever been. Now I find I am confronting another fantasy that I would fall on my feet and not have to wor...	maresie2	3	622	Nov 14, 2007 by carolinagirl
	I think I might as well shut up (Preview) I have written three posts tonight trying to unload my grief and hopelessness. I have deleted them and have decided that perhaps I try too hard. Perhaps it is best to shut the heck up and take what has been dealt to me. I have lost my little family to alcohol and divorce. I have lost the great relationship I...	omajoy	7	729	Nov 13, 2007 by maresie2
	Sometimes people come into your life and you know right away that they were meant to be there: (Preview) Sometimes people come into your life and you know right away that they were meant to be there: they serve some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson or help figure out who you are or who you want to become. You never know who these people may be: your roommate, neighbor, professor, long-lost friend, lover o...	Lauren ashley	4	5220	Nov 13, 2007 by maresie2
	November Business meeting Minutes: (Preview) MIP November business meeting: November 11/07 Chair opened meeting with the Serenity Prayer, 1st thing on agenda is OP schedule, which was posted along with a description of the requirements to be an OP. October Minutes were approved as written. Treasury report was given by dot: She reported t...	serenity62	0	422	Nov 13, 2007 by serenity62
	procrastination (Preview) Okay, I am fortunate enough to have a "long" weekend in that I don't have work tomorrow (veteran's day) ... My intention was to work (finish) my step 4 Ahhhh intentions I have been working on (or I usually say "procrastinating on") Step 4 since JUNE I keep getting "stuck&qu...	Positivelydee	2	552	Nov 13, 2007 by Karilynn
	he wont stop and it kills me (Preview) my dad is an alcholic. he has been for a couple years now. he stopped for a couple weeks when my mom gave him the ultimatum. i came home tonight, and he started again. i should be used to it by now, but everytime he starts up again i am just so hurt and angry. my mom wants to leave him- but cant, because of us, &qu...	islu1953	14	806	Nov 13, 2007 by Karilynn
	HES DRIVING ME CRAZY (Preview) Well the AH hasn't had a drink for 3 days. But he's driving me insane. He wants to argue with me every minute of every day. I haven't been returning his arguments until today. I just lost it. The argument was over something stupid and I just went nuts. Usually I can busy myself with housework or something a...	cookie1971	5	767	Nov 13, 2007 by Jerry F
	Believe in yourself (Preview)	Christy	2	354	Nov 12, 2007 by ddub
	baffling and brilliant (Preview) It never ceases to amaze me how my ah can turn anything and everything into blame on my part. Somehow, I think many of you can relate! Some background - ah has been out of house for 6 mos. He sees the kids a lot, but not on a regular schedule; mostly when convenient for him, but at least 5-6 times a week. Has ha...	Loupiness	2	399	Nov 12, 2007 by Kim65
	bummer (Preview) AH was real drunk and I sneaky asked about the court summons he got in the paper. He told me it was for open container and that his drivers liscence has been suspended. It is very likely that he will not remember telling me this. My mind is still processing this information. But I can say, he is the only one w...	RainyJamie	5	590	Nov 12, 2007 by RainyJamie
	RE: I Passed! (Preview) Updating my last post: I passed! It was so awesome! I mean the test was really hard but I gave it all I had, took over two hours. I checked and rechecked and then turned it in. I had to check online from my desk at work and when I read I passed I was just so relieved. Everyone at work crowded around and we just che...	Belladay	10	1191	Nov 12, 2007 by Karilynn
	Thank you Veterans (Preview) ((((((((Family))))), Just wanted to take the time to thank all the veterans today. My Dad, Uncles and Grandfathers were all vets. Hubby was in the Navy too and I have many friends who are still serving. Thank you for your service. To all those out there serving thank you too. To the families, th...	Karilynn	0	323	Nov 12, 2007 by Karilynn
	He is coming to help.... (Preview) My AHsober that moved out 2 years ago said he would come over this weekend to help me with wood, fixing things up, etc. I have tried to get anyone to help me with those things particularly after my shoulder surgery. He always says "do you want me to come over?" I say "what do you want to do?&...	nmike	4	557	Nov 12, 2007 by maresie2
	Marriage or "end of" marriage counseling (Preview) On the way to work one morning, my daughter told me that Daddy hurt her. When I asked where, she pointed to it. As you can imagine, the worst fear that a mother could have was realized. I contacted her doctor, spoke with my AHs court therapist and now the Court Judge is aware of the situatio...	Heather72	6	1597	Nov 12, 2007 by maresie2
	New and in need of advice. (Preview) I am new to thos board and so glad to have found it. My mother is an alcoholic and has been for the last 15 years. She goes through brief phases of sobriety. I am getting married next year. My mom and I were meant to go wedding dress shopping together a few weeks ago. She promised she would be sober. I turned u...	ke2	8	517	Nov 12, 2007 by ke2
	OUCH (Preview) Hi all ~ I just need to vent ~ As most of you know, I had to put my precious cat, Buster Boy, down this past Thursday morning. It was the hardest thing my husband and I hever had to do - he was our baby with fur and a very big part of our lives and who we had become. Crazy as that may sound to some. The "firsts&...	Positivelydee	5	481	Nov 12, 2007 by cookie1971
	Sponsorship is so hard for me, looking for advice please (Preview) I asked a woman to sponsor me. She said she would. She said she wanted me to call her once a week. I said I thought I could do that and then did not. I apologized and said I wanted to try this again she said OK and now I do not call her, still. I have such a hard time reaching out. I cannot imagine bothering someo...	Jean4444	7	603	Nov 11, 2007 by lin0606
	What is with the TV shows tonight? (Preview) I've been watching tv since 8. All 3 shows have had drugs/alcohol story lines. Is this because of the writer's strike? Are they recruting alanon members to write the story lines?LOL! One was a dad trying to keep his sons from the lifestyle of drugs and gangs. The second one character found her husband'...	serendipity	0	372	Nov 11, 2007 by serendipity
	WOOHOO! IT'S SNOWING! (Preview) (((((((((((Family))))))), GOOD MORNING! Just wanted to officially document the first snowfall of the season here in NY! I'm so excited I can't stand it! While I can't make snow people yet or snowballs, it's truly beautiful. After a long tough week of work, I have a rare Saturday off, and lo and...	Karilynn	6	456	Nov 11, 2007 by lilms
	Looking for a poem (Preview) As many of you know, I had to put my precious Buster Cat to rest the other day and boy does this house feel EMPTY. The tears just keep flowing We decided to have Buster cremated and to receive his ashes back in an urn and we intend on doing a memorial of sorts ~ so ~ here is what I am looking for... There is a poem c...	Positivelydee	9	1469	Nov 11, 2007 by Positivelydee
	I think I just got ripped off! (Long but what's new) (Preview) Help me put two and two together here . . . maybe it will equal ZERO and I'm imagining things, which is fine by me, I don't need the trouble! Yesterday mutual friends of exA and I brought over a cord of pine rounds for firewood. This was unannounced, as the puppies had chewed through my phone cord (again)....	Kim65	23	3080	Nov 11, 2007 by debilyn
	i "should know"?? (Preview) my (sober) A is throwing a fit tonight, not directing it at me but he broke a glass bowl, called someone and swore them out at 10:30pm, then kicked the phone across the room. before that, he'd gone out way before dinner, stayed out til 10, didn't tell me when he'd be back, i was worried he'd run out of gas or s...	sadako	3	500	Nov 11, 2007 by lin0606
	USING AGAIN (Preview) I found out that my husband was using herion again. I found out the other day that he was using when we went to the emergency room. He has been going to the meeting yesterday is when he started. I am hanging in there. I going to try and go to my meeting for face to face tonight. He is now taking a drug to help him...	nycbt	7	465	Nov 11, 2007 by aunitedway
	Confused and feeling alone (Preview) Let me begin by introducing myself. I am a young mother of 2 little girls, and married to an alcoholic, drug user. My husband started AA in 2001, he did very well for his first year, he still has not had a drink since. He is also a drug user and has been for many years. He is not a constant user but has been caugh...	elikapika	3	656	Nov 11, 2007 by Heather72
	Peggy7 (Preview) Please check for a private message. Thank you.	shimo	0	524	Nov 11, 2007 by shimo
	Am I being Unreasonable (Preview) Hi everyone If you have read my topics you know that I have let my AH come back home. Now I am starting to regret my decision. Here is why and please tell me if I am being unreasonable or if he is reverting back to old abusive behaviors. It feels like the latter to me. Some background, my Ah was very emotionall...	verenda	13	780	Nov 11, 2007 by LocoMotions
	To know or know not? (Preview) AH opened a letter, his face fell and he quietly walked to where (he thought) I couldn't see him. "What is it?" I say, being nosy "oh, it's nothing" he says, with his back to me. "I got a ticket a while ago, and now I have to go to court" "What kind of a ticket?" I c...	RainyJamie	10	688	Nov 10, 2007 by RainyJamie
	(new here) Is it possible for AA to backfire?... (Preview) I know AA has helped countless people, BUT has anyone else here seen an A use it as an excuse to drink? My AH attributes his "mess ups" to the fact that he can't control himself and that it's a disease, which he says comes from AA. He has made a profession out of being an alcoholic. He started dr...	LocoMotions	10	726	Nov 10, 2007 by abbyal
	Self preservation recipe... working STEP 4 (Preview) Good morning everyone, It's me again. Trying to work on a self preservation recipe. Why? Well further to my inventory of myself, as required when one reaches Step 4 - "Make a searching and fearless moral inventory of self." - it all seems to be too late for me. I needed to do this twenty yea...	Heartbroken	6	632	Nov 10, 2007 by Jen
	Marital Sex During Rehab (Preview) My husband is an alcoholic and I am a non-drinking non-alcoholic. Our experience of alcoholism seems to differ markedly in a couple of respects from all the stories we've come across (both online and in AA / Al-Anon meetings and literature). After 5 years of married hell I put myself through a recov...	anahera	3	708	Nov 10, 2007 by Diva
	New member-trying to figure this all out (Preview) I just joined and Thank you for the FAQ's they were helpful. I stumbled apon this website tonight in hopes of finding a chat for al anon. I have not really became a member of any al anon meetings in my town yet, but I did sit in on one but I was late so no one knew I was a newcomer. My husband is an alcoholic, we...	Tree	3	626	Nov 10, 2007 by david62
	Prayer Request (Preview) I am on my way to take my daughter in-law to hospital ER. She is the one with Cysic Fibrosis. Please say a prayer for her and the family. Last March she was given just 1 year. Hugs Mary	marmare	6	421	Nov 10, 2007 by carosie
	Seething with anger (Preview) Hi everyone, I am beside myself. I am so full of anger right now. I got screwed over at work and did not receive my bonus. Everyone received their bonus, but me. I am also the only female. I'm starting to notice how oppressive the work environment is and I want to run away screaming. I am praying for HP to hel...	kissers	5	688	Nov 10, 2007 by leo
	Religion in posts, Without Labels, etc (Preview) Hi everyone.... there has been a lot of discussion recently about the posting of religious statements/sentiments on this board, and what is appropriate, etc. Like many things, the answer isn't totally black & white, but I really think the summary below, which I posted (as a reprint) a few day...	canadianguy	2	712	Nov 10, 2007 by wp
	Quote that made me smile today (Preview) It's often easy to fall into that "pity party" about how life isn't fair to us, particularly regarding our circumstances around addictions, etc... I laughed today at this quote, and thought it might bring a few smiles to you as well. Tom Expecting the world to treat you fairlyBecause y...	canadianguy	7	676	Nov 10, 2007 by cookie1971
	Sobriety?? maybe... (Preview) (((Everyone)))) My A has had some kind of awakening. He is so remorseful ..... about everything. Only he wants to forget everything that has happened over the last three yrs since he's left us. I'm about to lose my mind. He's here constantly, pushing, wanting me to say that everything is going to be...	Lunamoth	5	721	Nov 9, 2007 by abbyal
	November Business Meeting - This Sunday! (Preview) Hello ((((Family))))) This Sunday is our monthly business/group conscious meeting. The meeting will be at 8pm cst As of this time we dont have much on the agenda, if anyone has an item they would like to have considered for discussion, please send me a pm by tomorrow (Saturday) evening. Thanks! and Se...	david62	0	345	Nov 9, 2007 by david62
	The days after the storm (Preview) I finally blew up at my AH last Friday. He had 34 days of sobriety that ended on 9/23, followed by about 34 days of chronic drinking. He was pulled over a week ago Wednesday and almost got a dui. If freaked him out but he came home drunk on Thursday. On Friday my check was rejected at Wal Mart because he kept ta...	babysteps	4	634	Nov 9, 2007 by Jen
	I want to rip my lungs out! (Preview) Today is going by REALLY REALLY slow! I just want it to be over. I'd like to sleep for the next week and not feel this! My lungs feel tight and I know if I had a cigarette they would open up, how ironic is that? I have been totally tired and antsy alternating all day. I know the coughing will start tomorro...	carolinagirl	11	829	Nov 9, 2007 by Chetch
	My Al-Anon Religion (Preview) Al-anon is a program which is supposed to be spread through attraction rather than promotion. How do we do this? We live our lives in a manner that might cause another person to look at us and wonder how do they live their life with so much peace, serenity, joy, happiness, kindness, tolerance, consid...	david62	3	607	Nov 9, 2007 by bob6502
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.