Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Becky1 · Becky1

Hubby has been pestering me to death to talk, after almost 3 years of not. I don't know how to act, how to handle this revelation. Truth is, I am confused, scared, etc. I left him a 2 page scribbled note on the kitchen table on the way to work yesterday morning. Told him I was confused. How I felt shut dow...

serendipity · serendipity

So, I am again in financial straights. I am seeing the pattern (FINALLY!) and am trying to figure it out. Ok, I am 56 dollars overdrawn in my checking. And that is all I have. NO savings, no IRA or 401K or credit, nothing. I live paycheck to paycheck and that doesn't begin to cover living. It really should s...

Heartbroken · Heartbroken

As a direct result of the very violent relationship that I experienced as the battered wife of an A, I have found it really difficult to even contemplate a loving relationship that might result in my finding a husband that I can go through the rest of my life with. I saw my marriage as being a union for life...

Heartbroken · Heartbroken

...whilst I feel that I have made progress during the last week, I am a little concerned about the hospital appointment that I have tomorrow and the brain scan - though that will not take long as I am ' a bear of little brain...'[ similar to Pooh Bear] - none-the-less, it is a little scarey. Should get th...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

I wasn't exactly brought up in one of those Norman Rockwell paintings you used to see on the cover of the Saturday Evening Post. --Reggie Jackson We have many myths about other people's lives. When we compare ourselves to these stories, we come up short. We have the TV families in our minds. We may have s...

Tenderheartsks · Tenderheartsks

We can go forward with our life and recoveries, even though someone we love is not yet recovering. Picture a bridge. On one side of the bridge it is cold and dark. We stood there with others in the cold and darkness, doubled over in pain. Some of us developed an eating disorder to cope with the pain. Some dr...

silverbrumby · silverbrumby

I kicked my husband out of the house 10 days ago and every day I feel different. I miss him and I don't. I just feel so weird. I can't decide that I have done the right thing or not, now that I have leveled out. I crack a tooth and needed emergency treatment, guess who I rang when I didn't have enough money? Gues...

debilyn · debilyn

Hi family,Some of you know that my first husband of 26 was an A. He was killed in a pedestrian accident. He was at a major event here in Oregon setting up a band my second husband played bass in. Sadly he left the mountain setting,walked to the nearby tourist restaurant and drank hard stuff. Got on the hiwa...

ernie · ernie

Can anyone tell me how many of you have had your husband/wife/Sig other find soberity in AA, worked the program and have had stayed together? I see so many in AA who are hooked up with other recovering A's I just wonder whats the norm, what are the chances of "relationship survival" once the a...

AlaMom · AlaMom

How the time flies around here. I was reviewing my profile this morning and discovered that as of this past Friday I have been a member of this site for 3 years. I think I toiled around on here for about a year before that. I wanted to let you all know that this has been an amazing journey here with you all....

Jean4444 · Jean4444

I have noticed that I tend to pile on tasks, jobs, etc. when I am freaking out and feeling overwhelmed instead of simplifying. I can see that this "saying yes" or not being able to say "no" re: work/career stuff right now is my way of burying land mines for myself and sabotaging my s...

Codependent · Codependent

Well, The A got beat up by 5 people in the jail he was originally placed. Not sure what happened, but apparently he broke 4 or 5 bones around his eye socket and it may require reconstructive surgery. His mom paid to have him bonded out of that jail and transferred to another one that has a warrant on him- g...

Aloha · Aloha

Ugh. I really dislike having to recognize things in me that I thought, somehow, I was "above" or even incapable of being. I finally got my AH to see a counselor. Nooo. NO! Wait - *I* didn't get him to see the counselor. HE made the appointment. It just sucks that I was the one to initially su...

silverbrumby · silverbrumby

Had a phone call to AH regarding finances. It's a nightmare and humiliating to go through it but I will cause I have to. I'm not going back to him. Not for a long time.... I am confused though because in all this I have not told him that he has to stop drinking to reconcile with me. But today he said, "Why...

ally · ally

((((((((((((((Guys))))))))))))))) I've been doing some "soul searching" tonight. The last year of my life has been one big, ugly, merry-go-round. I have had every emotion know to man and woman, I've felt, jealousy, fear, pain, anger, hate, I've cried buckets over and over again. Rese...

Dale · Dale

If anyone is going to the conferance in july, and is looking for someone to split the cost of a room. send me a message. Thanks, Dale

melamom815 · melamom815

Hi Everyone!! It has been forever since I have been here. We still don't have internet at home so I am at my mom's catching up on everything internet! lol. Just a quick catch up for everyone. The kids and I are doing great. My AH has been sober for almost a year now and is doing wonderful! We all are stil...

concerned123 · concerned123

I am new to this board and new to being in a relationship with an A. I read so many posts and so many stories and most of the time it scares me because it seems like it is almost inevitable that my A will not be able to recover and eventually i will have no choice but to leave. Is my hope that he will beat this and...

Destynee · Destynee

My 72 day sober AH relapsed. I found beer cans hidden in the garbage (by accident-I dropped my keys in there and was digging them out.) And then I saw the 12 pack box in the outside garbage. I kind of felt he may have been drinking because he came to bed really late the last 2 nights which is unusual. Do I sa...

concerned123 · concerned123

My AB gave me the best news 3 days ago. He said that he was going to quit drinking because he was tired of it and "tired of feeling like shit every morning". he said this as he was pouring all of his leftover beer down the drain. i was thrilled, but i remained calm and told him that i was proud of h...

Becky1 · Becky1

Friday, after almost 2 months of non-communicating, except to tell me he wants a divorce and hates me, my AH sends me a text that says "I love You" Big whoop-d-doo! I am numb. I am beyond tired of dealing with his crap. It took me a long, long time to get to this point. So, I just didn't answer him....

ddub · ddub

So isn't it amazing how we can feel or look at things in ways that are all mixed up. In some ways I feel I can see some things clearly now but another one will sneak away and hide from me somehow. ah-ha, this is the what is my part in all this. So I am giving myself my own intro to step 4 which I will look at next....

tea2 · tea2

Hi Family One of the reoccuring topics I see on here is money and finances.I'm certainly not breaking news by saying the cost of gas is ever rising. So I felt by sharing these links (which I have found to be pretty accurate) others might find them to be a useful tool as well. http://www.gasbuddy.com/an...

Barbs45 · Barbs45

Hi everyone, I've not posted in quite a while,but felt the need to come and share with all you wonderful people again. It's about a year ago since I first found MIP, and I realise today when I reflect back to last year how very confused I'd become again then. I'm still challenging myself to live in this day...

maresie · maresie

As you all know I moved into a house with a lot of of other people which has been very very stressful for me. One of the people in the house turned out to be a psychopath. A total liar, bully and a well I won't say anymore. Eventually after tons of complaints the landlord made him move out. He went last Saturda...

round3 · round3

As I posted earlier, I've been having issues with cutting people off who I have trouble with in my life. Sometimes that may be okay, sometimes I know it just isn't. Sometimes other things are at play and I just need to use the tools of al-anon to deal with it. Last night is a perfect example. Last night...

maresie · maresie

One of my cats died yesterday. He had been poorly for some time. He had not been taking care of his fur and had been very very tired. I had no idea he was so ill. I felt tremendously guilty because I was gone a while interviewing. Then i remembered there was no way that this cat would have survived without...

redrelic · redrelic

Hey everyone I'm brand new to Al Anon, and new to this group. My spouse is an alcoholic. I feel pretty empty right now, because it hurts too much to feel - so I guess feeling empty is good. I know I'm not perfect, and I make alot of mistakes. I know that there were problems in our relationship waaaaaaaay befo...

jmh137 · jmh137

Hello to everyone, I am a mother of an alcoholic and drug user. It hurts. I want some place to go to relate to others like myself. jmh137

silverbrumby · silverbrumby

Dear Alanons, After being so distraught with grief, for a few days, I am feeling much better! Much better. Actually....I am feeling stronger by the minute! I feel so much weight has been taken off me. I am not trying to make this heavy, demanding, draining relationship HAPPEN ANYMORE! Even though I am...

Jean4444 · Jean4444

I was just reading some CAL (al-anon Conference Approved Literature) this after noon and read about something I had not read about before. The 4 M's. They are Managing, Manipulating, Martyrdom and Mothering. From what I read, these four characteristics can go either way for us al-anoners. I though...

maresie · maresie

I am just determined to get benefits, holidays and time to myself. I am sick of being a slave. I got stuck with all the work in my last job while everyone else could take off for everything. I asked for one morning off to go tot he doctor and they had a fit! I deserve better. I deserve to have a life. I deserve t...

Diva · Diva

My A has had severe back troubles..stenosis, which I guess is very, very painful. He had a series of injections into his back which may have eased his pain somewhat, but not entirely. He was given vicodin for the pain, which scares me to death. He has not ever been addicted to drugs as far as I know, but...

david62 · david62

Hello ((((Family))) This Sunday Feb 10th at 9pm EST is our monthly group conscious/business meeting. The agenda for the meeting is: Secretary's Report Treasurer's Report Old Business: Meeting Schedule/Chair Schedule Update New Business: Meeting Protocol & Manners The meeting will be i...

Heartbroken · Heartbroken

...collapsed at the doctors' surgery today and had to be brought home after being taken to hospital for another check up. My friend is clearing up down stairs after bringing me home, feeding me and making up drinks for the night. So this is just a quickie before I bed down for the rest of the night. My ve...

Loupiness · Loupiness

As I last posted, my ah is about to significantly reduce his time at work in order to heal his back and work his recovery program. This is a man whose greatest addiction has been work, and ultimately his out of balance life got him to the point he is today. He has gone from not being able to attend his child...

maresie · maresie

I'm off to another interview this morning. I need those benefits so bad! Please send up some prayers for me to have some stabilty, sanity and comfort in my work environment. Maresie.

silverbrumby · silverbrumby

Thankyou for your caring replies to my posts. I hope I am not posting too much. I met my A today to talk after being separated for 6 days. We hugged each other and he (and I) sobbed out loud. He doesn't understand why I am doing this and is concerned about how we are going to manage two homes. I wrote him a lon...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Since the A has been out of jail he has insisted on emailing, calling, texting and completely violating the restraining order and disrespecting my wishes. My son answered the phone once and I told him don't call me anymore. I will call you in March if you're still doing well you can see the kids. I tho...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Hi everyone! I am struggling with a few things but basically my life is great! Jen is without power I think. She and I talk everyday sometimes late at night! One time I called her because I hit my head and couldn't reach my alcoholic! Anyway, Jen is so special to me. I don't know what I would do without h...

Christy · Christy

It was my Grandson Devyn's 4th Birthday yesterday. I decided to take him out to dinner so he could tell me all about his party at day care etc. Here is the conversation as we were driving to Applebee's. Devyn: Gramma Jo? (my name is Christy Jo) Me: Yes Devyn? Devyn: I'm really hungry Me: Good! What do...

maresie · maresie

Last year when the A was ill, I pulled out al the stops to take care of him, found him a place, fed him, took care of him, supported him, encouraged him and worked day and night to support it all. Now I am ill, really absolutely exhausted to the bone and I don't have the same ferocious passion to take care of me...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Lately, I have been feeling like my life has sunk into a rut. Same thing day in day out. 4 days a week I get up early and go to a job an hour away, 2 or 3 nights a week I go to another job. I spend every weekend working. That affects both my social life and my daughter's. Neither of us has one basically. Some...

gardengal · gardengal

Every year I post this same question, to make people think. Finding a nook in your home, a place in the garden or yard, that you call your very own. An oasis of sorts where you can escape to when needed to regain your sanity. In our harried lives we tend to forget to take time to rest, meditate, relax, find...

QOD · QOD

He called to apologize again and tell me how much he LOVES me and doesn't want to live without me. He gave me all the same crap he always gives me. How I am what keeps him going every day and he needs me. How much he loves. How he is going to prove to me that he loves me and be a better man. He is going to work har...

Loupiness · Loupiness

I Hi Friends, I've been in a funk the past few weeks, but think I finally cracked it a bit by looking at my divorce papers (a month later) and making a decision about and phoning an attorney. Time to move on. Things are shifting a bit, and I see God clearly at work. It's odd though, it doesn't bring me peac...

Heartbroken · Heartbroken

Some days ago someone in the family recommended this Thought for the day website and I went to visit it. Since then I have read some great thoughts, however I was particularly struck by this one and it has made me reassess my own Strength and Weakness. Take what you like from it or simply discard it, how...

silverbrumby · silverbrumby

Hullo fellow alanons. After refusing to play alcoholic games anymore and asking my AH to stay away, I am now in my 5th day of separation. The pain is setting in. The loss the sadness. Oh how I miss him He is distraught and shocked beyond belief that I actually mean it. I have taken the biggest risk of my life...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((((((Family))))), For all of you in the path of the storms, I'm sending you all the love and prayers I can. Here's hoping you're all safe and sound. Let us know you're okay or if you need anything. Love and prayers for all those affected by the storms. I know we have some Alanon families in the area...

round3 · round3

Not sure where I am with myself right now. I've been processing a lot of things that have gone on in the past couple of months and I think I'm beginning to get to the anger portion of my "stuff". As many of you know, my A broke off our long distance relationship following his slip at Thanksgivi...

maresie · maresie

As you all know I have reached a point where my stress was overwhelming. Things started to shift me for me. The house I live in has become more bearable because of the exit of two people. I left the job that was causing me tremendous stress. I will get unemployment for a while which gives me some time to r...

maresie · maresie

Every bit of me wants to be out there in a panic looking for work but my health is at a standstill and I am going to have to take some time to regroup. I am absolutely tired to the bone and do not know how to get beyond the fatigue state I am in. I also feel incredibly alone. I am trying to rest and eat right and reg...

QOD · QOD

Well, I have to say that I expected him to EVENTUALLY regret how he treated me Sunday and Monday night. I figured he would apologize and ask for forgiveness. I just didn't expect it this soon. He called me at lunch time today and said he was sorry for the things he said and he didn't mean any of it. He was h...

bev · bev

i went to his work at lunch time and told him about my daughter and that i want to go to ny in case something happens to the baby,he in return tells me to wait until she is born then go up,i told him i want to be up there in case it does happen that she doesnt make it,his words{WAIT TO SEE AFTER MY DAUGHTER HAS THE B...

Christy · Christy

This is Eckhart Tolle speaking of living in the NOW. He has a wonderful way of explaining that we are not the things we have been through. It is simply that, things we have lived through. He also explains what the NOW is. As usual I have to say this may be a bit out there for some... but then you don't h...

Tenderheartsks · Tenderheartsks

Before recovery, many of us lacked a frame of reference with which to name the victimization and abuse in our life. We may have thought it was normal that people mistreated us. We may have believed we deserved mistreatment; we may have been attracted to people who mistreated us. We need to let go, on a de...

gknee · gknee

I'm warning you now-- I'm on a rant. SA/AH is "sick" in bed, I'm at home, kids have snow day from school. We are buried in a big winter storm. I've shoveled twice, ran 3 miles on my treadmill. spending some time here answering others posts. I can't stop obsessing about H using again! He h...

greta · greta

Last night my brother mercifully died from lung cancer. He had been on hospice since October and had been doing very well. He was able to say goodbye and make amends to those close to him before the end. The end came so fast it was surprising. I am happy he did not suffer a long and painful death. Howev...

verenda · verenda

Hi I have been very detached from AH since last Saturday, mainly because I am just trying to protect myself from his emotional abuse, which he denies. Because of the total lack of emotional intimacy, emotional abuse, his violent anger, etc I have not wanted any pyhsical contact, I talk very little exc...

bev · bev

hi my family, i was wondering if some of have gone though this..my daughter is expecting in 4 weeks as in my earlier post the baby isnt gaining weight{daughter hasnt gained any weight in 2 months}THE ULTRASOUND SAID THE BABY IS ALMOST 2LBS{DEC 10}i want to go up there to be with my daughter and also in cas...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Baby, Baby...Where Did Our Love Go? (Preview) Hubby has been pestering me to death to talk, after almost 3 years of not. I don't know how to act, how to handle this revelation. Truth is, I am confused, scared, etc. I left him a 2 page scribbled note on the kitchen table on the way to work yesterday morning. Told him I was confused. How I felt shut dow...	Becky1	2	480	Feb 14, 2008 by hersh
	graditude...lots of it! (long) (Preview) So, I am again in financial straights. I am seeing the pattern (FINALLY!) and am trying to figure it out. Ok, I am 56 dollars overdrawn in my checking. And that is all I have. NO savings, no IRA or 401K or credit, nothing. I live paycheck to paycheck and that doesn't begin to cover living. It really should s...	serendipity	5	549	Feb 13, 2008 by cookie1971
	FEAR of never sharing love again... (Preview) As a direct result of the very violent relationship that I experienced as the battered wife of an A, I have found it really difficult to even contemplate a loving relationship that might result in my finding a husband that I can go through the rest of my life with. I saw my marriage as being a union for life...	Heartbroken	3	540	Feb 12, 2008 by Tenderheartsks
	Please would you say a prayer... (Preview) ...whilst I feel that I have made progress during the last week, I am a little concerned about the hospital appointment that I have tomorrow and the brain scan - though that will not take long as I am ' a bear of little brain...'[ similar to Pooh Bear] - none-the-less, it is a little scarey. Should get th...	Heartbroken	8	496	Feb 13, 2008 by Maria123
	Understanding reality (Preview) I wasn't exactly brought up in one of those Norman Rockwell paintings you used to see on the cover of the Saturday Evening Post. --Reggie Jackson We have many myths about other people's lives. When we compare ourselves to these stories, we come up short. We have the TV families in our minds. We may have s...	Tiger2006	1	365	Feb 12, 2008 by Heartbroken
	Letting Go Of Those Not In Recovery (Preview) We can go forward with our life and recoveries, even though someone we love is not yet recovering. Picture a bridge. On one side of the bridge it is cold and dark. We stood there with others in the cold and darkness, doubled over in pain. Some of us developed an eating disorder to cope with the pain. Some dr...	Tenderheartsks	4	1224	Feb 14, 2008 by Codependent
	Reality bites (Preview) I kicked my husband out of the house 10 days ago and every day I feel different. I miss him and I don't. I just feel so weird. I can't decide that I have done the right thing or not, now that I have leveled out. I crack a tooth and needed emergency treatment, guess who I rang when I didn't have enough money? Gues...	silverbrumby	10	628	Feb 12, 2008 by round3
	I thought it was my fault (Preview) Hi family,Some of you know that my first husband of 26 was an A. He was killed in a pedestrian accident. He was at a major event here in Oregon setting up a band my second husband played bass in. Sadly he left the mountain setting,walked to the nearby tourist restaurant and drank hard stuff. Got on the hiwa...	debilyn	10	705	Feb 13, 2008 by Maria123
	Question/Poll (Preview) Can anyone tell me how many of you have had your husband/wife/Sig other find soberity in AA, worked the program and have had stayed together? I see so many in AA who are hooked up with other recovering A's I just wonder whats the norm, what are the chances of "relationship survival" once the a...	ernie	10	668	Feb 13, 2008 by Jen
	Anniversary... (Preview) How the time flies around here. I was reviewing my profile this morning and discovered that as of this past Friday I have been a member of this site for 3 years. I think I toiled around on here for about a year before that. I wanted to let you all know that this has been an amazing journey here with you all....	AlaMom	7	518	Feb 13, 2008 by Maria123
	Too many plates in the air = anxiety (the opposite of serenity?) (Preview) I have noticed that I tend to pile on tasks, jobs, etc. when I am freaking out and feeling overwhelmed instead of simplifying. I can see that this "saying yes" or not being able to say "no" re: work/career stuff right now is my way of burying land mines for myself and sabotaging my s...	Jean4444	6	542	Feb 12, 2008 by Jean4444
	Beat up in Jail (Preview) Well, The A got beat up by 5 people in the jail he was originally placed. Not sure what happened, but apparently he broke 4 or 5 bones around his eye socket and it may require reconstructive surgery. His mom paid to have him bonded out of that jail and transferred to another one that has a warrant on him- g...	Codependent	10	645	Feb 12, 2008 by Codependent
	"Co-dependent"? Noooo!! (Preview) Ugh. I really dislike having to recognize things in me that I thought, somehow, I was "above" or even incapable of being. I finally got my AH to see a counselor. Nooo. NO! Wait - I didn't get him to see the counselor. HE made the appointment. It just sucks that I was the one to initially su...	Aloha	10	635	Feb 13, 2008 by Aloha
	Told him sobriety is only way for us....? (Preview) Had a phone call to AH regarding finances. It's a nightmare and humiliating to go through it but I will cause I have to. I'm not going back to him. Not for a long time.... I am confused though because in all this I have not told him that he has to stop drinking to reconcile with me. But today he said, "Why...	silverbrumby	3	546	Feb 11, 2008 by debilyn
	WHEN OUR ACTIONS HIDE OUR TRUE FEELINGS.. (Preview) ((((((((((((((Guys))))))))))))))) I've been doing some "soul searching" tonight. The last year of my life has been one big, ugly, merry-go-round. I have had every emotion know to man and woman, I've felt, jealousy, fear, pain, anger, hate, I've cried buckets over and over again. Rese...	ally	5	681	Feb 11, 2008 by maresie
	International conferance (Preview) If anyone is going to the conferance in july, and is looking for someone to split the cost of a room. send me a message. Thanks, Dale	Dale	5	261	Feb 12, 2008 by Tuggboat
	Been a long time!!! (Preview) Hi Everyone!! It has been forever since I have been here. We still don't have internet at home so I am at my mom's catching up on everything internet! lol. Just a quick catch up for everyone. The kids and I are doing great. My AH has been sober for almost a year now and is doing wonderful! We all are stil...	melamom815	3	477	Feb 11, 2008 by debilyn
	Does it ever work out? (Preview) I am new to this board and new to being in a relationship with an A. I read so many posts and so many stories and most of the time it scares me because it seems like it is almost inevitable that my A will not be able to recover and eventually i will have no choice but to leave. Is my hope that he will beat this and...	concerned123	8	615	Feb 11, 2008 by debilyn
	Sober AH relapsed-what do I do? (Preview) My 72 day sober AH relapsed. I found beer cans hidden in the garbage (by accident-I dropped my keys in there and was digging them out.) And then I saw the 12 pack box in the outside garbage. I kind of felt he may have been drinking because he came to bed really late the last 2 nights which is unusual. Do I sa...	Destynee	5	600	Feb 12, 2008 by Tuggboat
	Should I nag or support? Should I be angry or undertanding? (Preview) My AB gave me the best news 3 days ago. He said that he was going to quit drinking because he was tired of it and "tired of feeling like shit every morning". he said this as he was pouring all of his leftover beer down the drain. i was thrilled, but i remained calm and told him that i was proud of h...	concerned123	6	509	Feb 12, 2008 by Karilynn
	Here We Go Again (Preview) Friday, after almost 2 months of non-communicating, except to tell me he wants a divorce and hates me, my AH sends me a text that says "I love You" Big whoop-d-doo! I am numb. I am beyond tired of dealing with his crap. It took me a long, long time to get to this point. So, I just didn't answer him....	Becky1	4	478	Feb 11, 2008 by maresie
	avoidance of reality (Preview) So isn't it amazing how we can feel or look at things in ways that are all mixed up. In some ways I feel I can see some things clearly now but another one will sneak away and hide from me somehow. ah-ha, this is the what is my part in all this. So I am giving myself my own intro to step 4 which I will look at next....	ddub	2	452	Feb 10, 2008 by round3
	Daily Finances (a tool I find helpful) (Preview) Hi Family One of the reoccuring topics I see on here is money and finances.I'm certainly not breaking news by saying the cost of gas is ever rising. So I felt by sharing these links (which I have found to be pretty accurate) others might find them to be a useful tool as well. http://www.gasbuddy.com/an...	tea2	0	306	Feb 9, 2008 by tea2
	It's Been A While. (Preview) Hi everyone, I've not posted in quite a while,but felt the need to come and share with all you wonderful people again. It's about a year ago since I first found MIP, and I realise today when I reflect back to last year how very confused I'd become again then. I'm still challenging myself to live in this day...	Barbs45	4	320	Feb 10, 2008 by ddub
	more hard news (Preview) As you all know I moved into a house with a lot of of other people which has been very very stressful for me. One of the people in the house turned out to be a psychopath. A total liar, bully and a well I won't say anymore. Eventually after tons of complaints the landlord made him move out. He went last Saturda...	maresie	2	390	Feb 9, 2008 by kissers
	Cutting people off (part 2) (Preview) As I posted earlier, I've been having issues with cutting people off who I have trouble with in my life. Sometimes that may be okay, sometimes I know it just isn't. Sometimes other things are at play and I just need to use the tools of al-anon to deal with it. Last night is a perfect example. Last night...	round3	8	539	Feb 10, 2008 by round3
	sad news (Preview) One of my cats died yesterday. He had been poorly for some time. He had not been taking care of his fur and had been very very tired. I had no idea he was so ill. I felt tremendously guilty because I was gone a while interviewing. Then i remembered there was no way that this cat would have survived without...	maresie	12	586	Feb 11, 2008 by carosie
	I'm New, and Feeling Raw (Preview) Hey everyone I'm brand new to Al Anon, and new to this group. My spouse is an alcoholic. I feel pretty empty right now, because it hurts too much to feel - so I guess feeling empty is good. I know I'm not perfect, and I make alot of mistakes. I know that there were problems in our relationship waaaaaaaay befo...	redrelic	10	552	Feb 11, 2008 by CoDependant
	Just joined to relate (Preview) Hello to everyone, I am a mother of an alcoholic and drug user. It hurts. I want some place to go to relate to others like myself. jmh137	jmh137	22	798	Feb 11, 2008 by jmh137
	Feeling good. (Preview) Dear Alanons, After being so distraught with grief, for a few days, I am feeling much better! Much better. Actually....I am feeling stronger by the minute! I feel so much weight has been taken off me. I am not trying to make this heavy, demanding, draining relationship HAPPEN ANYMORE! Even though I am...	silverbrumby	4	468	Feb 10, 2008 by Becky1
	The 4 M's (Preview) I was just reading some CAL (al-anon Conference Approved Literature) this after noon and read about something I had not read about before. The 4 M's. They are Managing, Manipulating, Martyrdom and Mothering. From what I read, these four characteristics can go either way for us al-anoners. I though...	Jean4444	18	14435	Aug 7, 2017 by mamalioness
	going on anoher interview on monday (Preview) I am just determined to get benefits, holidays and time to myself. I am sick of being a slave. I got stuck with all the work in my last job while everyone else could take off for everything. I asked for one morning off to go tot he doctor and they had a fit! I deserve better. I deserve to have a life. I deserve t...	maresie	2	353	Feb 8, 2008 by nmike
	That old devil suspicion (Preview) My A has had severe back troubles..stenosis, which I guess is very, very painful. He had a series of injections into his back which may have eased his pain somewhat, but not entirely. He was given vicodin for the pain, which scares me to death. He has not ever been addicted to drugs as far as I know, but...	Diva	17	742	Feb 11, 2008 by Jerry F
	February Business Meeting-Sunday Night! (Preview) Hello ((((Family))) This Sunday Feb 10th at 9pm EST is our monthly group conscious/business meeting. The agenda for the meeting is: Secretary's Report Treasurer's Report Old Business: Meeting Schedule/Chair Schedule Update New Business: Meeting Protocol & Manners The meeting will be i...	david62	0	291	Feb 8, 2008 by david62
	Poorly... (Preview) ...collapsed at the doctors' surgery today and had to be brought home after being taken to hospital for another check up. My friend is clearing up down stairs after bringing me home, feeding me and making up drinks for the night. So this is just a quickie before I bed down for the rest of the night. My ve...	Heartbroken	13	396	Feb 10, 2008 by cookie1971
	What do you think? (Preview) As I last posted, my ah is about to significantly reduce his time at work in order to heal his back and work his recovery program. This is a man whose greatest addiction has been work, and ultimately his out of balance life got him to the point he is today. He has gone from not being able to attend his child...	Loupiness	8	669	Feb 8, 2008 by Tenderheartsks
	prayers please (Preview) I'm off to another interview this morning. I need those benefits so bad! Please send up some prayers for me to have some stabilty, sanity and comfort in my work environment. Maresie.	maresie	6	329	Feb 8, 2008 by maresie
	He doesn't understand???Why??? (Preview) Thankyou for your caring replies to my posts. I hope I am not posting too much. I met my A today to talk after being separated for 6 days. We hugged each other and he (and I) sobbed out loud. He doesn't understand why I am doing this and is concerned about how we are going to manage two homes. I wrote him a lon...	silverbrumby	7	458	Feb 13, 2008 by Jen
	Why won't he just leave me alone? (Preview) Since the A has been out of jail he has insisted on emailing, calling, texting and completely violating the restraining order and disrespecting my wishes. My son answered the phone once and I told him don't call me anymore. I will call you in March if you're still doing well you can see the kids. I tho...	carolinagirl	6	472	Feb 8, 2008 by Jean4444
	It is worth the wait! (Preview) Hi everyone! I am struggling with a few things but basically my life is great! Jen is without power I think. She and I talk everyday sometimes late at night! One time I called her because I hit my head and couldn't reach my alcoholic! Anyway, Jen is so special to me. I don't know what I would do without h...	Hoot Nanny	0	341	Feb 7, 2008 by Hoot Nanny
	Some Grandson Humor (Preview) It was my Grandson Devyn's 4th Birthday yesterday. I decided to take him out to dinner so he could tell me all about his party at day care etc. Here is the conversation as we were driving to Applebee's. Devyn: Gramma Jo? (my name is Christy Jo) Me: Yes Devyn? Devyn: I'm really hungry Me: Good! What do...	Christy	13	630	Feb 11, 2008 by Hoot Nanny
	Taking care of myself the hardest topic (Preview) Last year when the A was ill, I pulled out al the stops to take care of him, found him a place, fed him, took care of him, supported him, encouraged him and worked day and night to support it all. Now I am ill, really absolutely exhausted to the bone and I don't have the same ferocious passion to take care of me...	maresie	5	484	Feb 8, 2008 by maresie
	I think I'm in a rut (Preview) Lately, I have been feeling like my life has sunk into a rut. Same thing day in day out. 4 days a week I get up early and go to a job an hour away, 2 or 3 nights a week I go to another job. I spend every weekend working. That affects both my social life and my daughter's. Neither of us has one basically. Some...	carolinagirl	2	460	Feb 7, 2008 by maresie
	Where is YOUR private space away from it all? (Preview) Every year I post this same question, to make people think. Finding a nook in your home, a place in the garden or yard, that you call your very own. An oasis of sorts where you can escape to when needed to regain your sanity. In our harried lives we tend to forget to take time to rest, meditate, relax, find...	gardengal	15	556	Feb 10, 2008 by gardengal
	My ex called again last night -Urrgghhh (Preview) He called to apologize again and tell me how much he LOVES me and doesn't want to live without me. He gave me all the same crap he always gives me. How I am what keeps him going every day and he needs me. How much he loves. How he is going to prove to me that he loves me and be a better man. He is going to work har...	QOD	4	557	Feb 8, 2008 by maresie
	Moving Forward (Preview) I Hi Friends, I've been in a funk the past few weeks, but think I finally cracked it a bit by looking at my divorce papers (a month later) and making a decision about and phoning an attorney. Time to move on. Things are shifting a bit, and I see God clearly at work. It's odd though, it doesn't bring me peac...	Loupiness	7	387	Feb 7, 2008 by ddub
	Strength and Weakness... (Preview) Some days ago someone in the family recommended this Thought for the day website and I went to visit it. Since then I have read some great thoughts, however I was particularly struck by this one and it has made me reassess my own Strength and Weakness. Take what you like from it or simply discard it, how...	Heartbroken	2	696	Feb 8, 2008 by cookie1971
	Separation Pain so great (Preview) Hullo fellow alanons. After refusing to play alcoholic games anymore and asking my AH to stay away, I am now in my 5th day of separation. The pain is setting in. The loss the sadness. Oh how I miss him He is distraught and shocked beyond belief that I actually mean it. I have taken the biggest risk of my life...	silverbrumby	10	614	Feb 7, 2008 by silverbrumby
	Prayers for our Alanon families (Preview) ((((((((Family))))), For all of you in the path of the storms, I'm sending you all the love and prayers I can. Here's hoping you're all safe and sound. Let us know you're okay or if you need anything. Love and prayers for all those affected by the storms. I know we have some Alanon families in the area...	Karilynn	2	348	Feb 8, 2008 by cookie1971
	Boundaries vs cutting people off (Preview) Not sure where I am with myself right now. I've been processing a lot of things that have gone on in the past couple of months and I think I'm beginning to get to the anger portion of my "stuff". As many of you know, my A broke off our long distance relationship following his slip at Thanksgivi...	round3	8	809	Feb 7, 2008 by round3
	Letting go (Preview) As you all know I have reached a point where my stress was overwhelming. Things started to shift me for me. The house I live in has become more bearable because of the exit of two people. I left the job that was causing me tremendous stress. I will get unemployment for a while which gives me some time to r...	maresie	5	278	Feb 7, 2008 by maresie
	pacing myself (Preview) Every bit of me wants to be out there in a panic looking for work but my health is at a standstill and I am going to have to take some time to regroup. I am absolutely tired to the bone and do not know how to get beyond the fatigue state I am in. I also feel incredibly alone. I am trying to rest and eat right and reg...	maresie	0	251	Feb 6, 2008 by maresie
	My ex called to apologize (Preview) Well, I have to say that I expected him to EVENTUALLY regret how he treated me Sunday and Monday night. I figured he would apologize and ask for forgiveness. I just didn't expect it this soon. He called me at lunch time today and said he was sorry for the things he said and he didn't mean any of it. He was h...	QOD	7	688	Feb 7, 2008 by Codependent
	update (Preview) i went to his work at lunch time and told him about my daughter and that i want to go to ny in case something happens to the baby,he in return tells me to wait until she is born then go up,i told him i want to be up there in case it does happen that she doesnt make it,his words{WAIT TO SEE AFTER MY DAUGHTER HAS THE B...	bev	5	403	Feb 6, 2008 by Tenderheartsks
	The Power of Now. (Preview) This is Eckhart Tolle speaking of living in the NOW. He has a wonderful way of explaining that we are not the things we have been through. It is simply that, things we have lived through. He also explains what the NOW is. As usual I have to say this may be a bit out there for some... but then you don't h...	Christy	7	540	Feb 7, 2008 by Christy
	Stopping Victimization (Preview) Before recovery, many of us lacked a frame of reference with which to name the victimization and abuse in our life. We may have thought it was normal that people mistreated us. We may have believed we deserved mistreatment; we may have been attracted to people who mistreated us. We need to let go, on a de...	Tenderheartsks	1	345	Feb 6, 2008 by maresie
	Oh where, oh where has my serenity gone? (Preview) I'm warning you now-- I'm on a rant. SA/AH is "sick" in bed, I'm at home, kids have snow day from school. We are buried in a big winter storm. I've shoveled twice, ran 3 miles on my treadmill. spending some time here answering others posts. I can't stop obsessing about H using again! He h...	gknee	3	498	Feb 7, 2008 by QOD
	should I have or shouldn't I have gone? (Preview) Last night my brother mercifully died from lung cancer. He had been on hospice since October and had been doing very well. He was able to say goodbye and make amends to those close to him before the end. The end came so fast it was surprising. I am happy he did not suffer a long and painful death. Howev...	greta	11	633	Feb 9, 2008 by Maria123
	Sober AH ...his response to my detachment...what to say (Preview) Hi I have been very detached from AH since last Saturday, mainly because I am just trying to protect myself from his emotional abuse, which he denies. Because of the total lack of emotional intimacy, emotional abuse, his violent anger, etc I have not wanted any pyhsical contact, I talk very little exc...	verenda	8	563	Feb 6, 2008 by Tenderheartsks
	has anyone else felt this way (Preview) hi my family, i was wondering if some of have gone though this..my daughter is expecting in 4 weeks as in my earlier post the baby isnt gaining weight{daughter hasnt gained any weight in 2 months}THE ULTRASOUND SAID THE BABY IS ALMOST 2LBS{DEC 10}i want to go up there to be with my daughter and also in cas...	bev	7	549	Feb 8, 2008 by leo
«First < 1 … 585 586 587 588 589 … 822 > Last» \| Page of 822 sorted by

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.