The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I'm the 20 year old daughter of an alcoholic mother.She has been an alcoholic my entire life, and lost custody of my brother and I as a kids. My 50 year old mother tried to kill herself a year ago and then was in rehab for several months and did GREAT. It was like meeting a new version of my mother I'd never seen before. Recently she moved to a halfway house type situation...and she started drinking again. I'm torn between disappointment and anger and not caring (to protect myself) and wanting to shake her silly and not let go. And to make things even more complicated by brother has been showing signs of having a drinking problem. I just need to feel like I'm not alone. I don't know what to do.
Welcome to MIP HappySad- You are definitely not alone. Alcoholism is a progressive, chronic, fatal disease that affects the entire family. A is the support group for the person who drinks and Alanon has been established to aid families of the alcoholic. Alanon holds face to face meetings in most communities and the hot line number is in the white pages.
I am so sorry that you are experiencing this dreadful disease in your family and would like to say that in alanon I learned that I was powerless over the disease and that I did not cause it, cannot control it and cannot cure it. Since this is the truth the best action that I can take is to find new tools to live by and help myself. Alanon has those tools and a support group that helped me through many difficult days
Please search out the meetings and keep coming back Your brother would also benefit
Coming here was a good first step. Many of us come from families plagued by alcoholism. You are not alone. F2F alanon and maybe ACOA (adult children of alcoholics ) might help.
HappySad - welcome to MIP - so glad you found us and glad you found your courage to join in and share.
So sorry for what you brought you here - relapse is a huge part of the disease and Al-Anon is the best medicine I know for those who are trying to support another with this disease. You have every right to be disappointed, it's a set back and it sucks.....However, you have no control over what she does next, but you can choose you, your recovery, your happiness, etc.
Try a meeting or 10 (ha.ha). Seriously - pinkchip has suggested two different programs, and I believe either will give you some support from others who totally understand what you're living what, how you feel and what it's been like.
We are a great group here too - so stick around and post anytime! We suggest the F2F (Face to Face) meetings so that you have local support and when ready, a local sponsor.
Keep coming back!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
