Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

stephaniej · stephaniej

Hello, my beloved MIPers! You may recall that my long-term temporary job ended on November 1. In mid-December I had an interview for a very, very good job with my county. Yesterday they called me and asked me to come in on Wednesday morning (tomorrow) to "meet with" the big cheese. I assu...

Aloha · Aloha

I was reading through some posts and was reminded very clearly that A's do what A's do... and time and again folks like myself get bowled over in shock when we expect the A to suddenly behave like someone other than an A. I even had this experience with my exA. He called me back in October to let me know that h...

willowtree · willowtree

The last 2 months have been really challenging for me. I planned my inlaws 50th wedding anniversary, it was Christmas, kept helping SO many people out to the point of exhaustion and then slight resentment, and my brother in law and his 3 kids stayed with us for a week. Having my BIL stay with us really p...

el-cee · el-cee

I've been thinking about why I ended up as a codependant enabler. At what point in my life did I become like this? Is it a self esteem issue? I think it comes from my childhood, I've always people pleased and was brought up like this. My ex ah and I were made for each other really, two mixed up people who got si...

Pushka · Pushka

I know it's before the court time .. LOL .. that's OOOOKKKKK. Turns out my atty and her folks found out I didn't need to be there today. They have continued the case until??? Don't know that answer just yet. Suffice to say that doing the next right thing is a good thing. I highly encourage anyone deal...

John · John

Rarely am i someone at a loss for words. However, i feel like i was hit with a stun gun lately. I paid to bring my 32 yr old son here to North Carolina after his marriage took the plunge. First thing he found was alcohol, then a girlfriend he got preg, then two felony charges for b&e at a closed store a few block...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

I guess I've always liked hearing that "today is another chance to get it right." Of course this has mean't not only days of second chances but years of trying to make progress. I am sometimes better than other times but I know I will never get it "right." I'm not sure I even know w...

DellaB · DellaB

I made it to and through my first meeting and went to another yesterday. Thank you ALL for your encouragement to go! I felt like I should have signed in though with a big fat Crayon instead of a pen! :) But seriously, I could relate to so many, cried the whole time, and have felt numb since......but it i...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I just celebrated 27 years in the program on Friday! I am so grateful to this program; it has saved my life more than once--it can save & change your lives too. I have never been able to find anything that was more effective than alanon. It really is the best thing that has ever happened to me except the...

Gw · Gw

Their father gets out of jail this month and I am wondering how to protect the kids from contact When it was just alcohol that was the addiction, I could tell when he was under the influence after one spoken word. Now that drugs are involved, I am unaware. I am concerned the drugs have done permanent br...

hightlyfavored · hightlyfavored

My a/a daughter called, told me about the program to get her GED, before the conversation ended she asked if I had any pants or warmup suits she could have, she said she can't wear jeans to class. I told to go to the thrift store, she said she didn't have any $. She reminded of my surplus of clothes, I told h...

frannix · frannix

After my brother went through rehab, I allowed him to move into my house until he got on his feet. He was sober for the first year and I gave him all the support I could. But then he started drinking more and more. He just ruined our Christmas celebration for the 3rd year in a row -- as well as our Easter d...

cinders · cinders

I have to say I am very proud of myself. When my AH and I seperated, I moved to a new house. He does not have the address, phone number or new email address. I chose to create a very large barrier in order to start finding my sanity and having as much division between us as possible. I was really hurt and th...

Annie1234 · Annie1234

Well, best laid plans. I attempted to go to my first F2F meeting today at 1:00. When I arrived at the location that was listed on the Al-Anon meeting website, I was told that they stopped having meetings there on Tuesday afternoons. I'm having such a rough time today, and really felt it was time for m...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

All was well last night as I retired and I wake up to a message that my son had this burning desire to drink. He said he called his sponser but I don't know if it did any good or not. Can only pray Not doing so well this morning so I understand my need of continued support and help of Al-anon. I let my guard down...

Pushka · Pushka

It was another sleepless night last night each time I think I'm ok, I wind up with some weird dream I can't remember. Asking for prayers again my friends, .. I do not know the outcome .. I do know God is bigger and has a better plan. I have tried not to choose or push the "if you insist" door. It'...

tortuga · tortuga

I want to share here today, for isolation is not good for me, and because sharing with some people in my life isn't always easy, and keeps them worrying, and sometimes they cannot understand the actual situation I am in, because they stand outside the madness. here in MIP I have been feeling safe since t...

imom · imom

So tonight I finally got to my first f2f meeting in a few months. I have made every excuse in the book about why I cannot get to them. I knew I would be late because I had to pick up my daughter from practice first, but I allowed myself to do that and walk in late. I was only ten minutes late and I still made it. I t...

amarchand · amarchand

Hello this is my first time on here and looking for advice. My husband and i have been married 9 years and together 14 years (we are 33). We started dating when we were 19 and partied full on with alcohol and all kinds off drugs till we were 24 (got married). We started for baby and 2 miscarraiges and a year of...

Kismet · Kismet

My AH has been sober for 5 months now; 3 months in rehab and home for the past 2 months. He is doing really well and is very active in his AA and NA meetings, he has been approached to be someone's sponsor and he is really enjoying helping people. I have been working on my co-dependency and have really begun t...

stephaniej · stephaniej

I have been a grateful member here for over 2 years. In the past 18 months, during which my AH's drinking has escalated steadily, I have slowly worked toward detaching from his behavior. I have been feeling more and more like I am ready to leave him. One of the reasons I have been able to detach is that h...

Debilyn · Debilyn

We met here at MIP, over ten years ago. He and I kept in communication over ten years, we were very close friends. Reminded each other of our Al Anon skills dealing with my now ex AH, and his soon to be ex AW. Kids are grown now and gone, he is done. Very sadly he has found the evidense of the drug use. We had seen...

1976love · 1976love

Since my AH has been going to AA and has been sober for 4weeks now, he is starting to do more around the house and thinks everyone else should too. Today he flipped his lid when he was trying to move a chair from the basement to the upstairs. While he was in the basement my younger son was down there playing...

Pushka · Pushka

You know you would think I would get that lesson and seriously it still boggles my mind. There are some freaky things going on at the moment. I have court tomorrow and I am asking for prayers. I feel like the best thing that could happen is (I know wait for it .. LOL) it would actually be delayed. I can't...

ParisMemories · ParisMemories

I've been to 5 or 6 meetings over the last few months, and just recently made the commitment to come at least once a week. I came to my first meeting in complete desperation, having just had another blow out argument with my husband, an active alcoholic / addict. The cycle was the same, he would be drunk wh...

bryteyes · bryteyes

Been with my verbally abusive AB for 2 years and although his drinking has slowed down extremely im still terrified of what could happen and find myself scared every time he walks out the door which is a lot because we have no transportation and he walks everywhere. Ive been diagnosed with PTSD just fro...

willowtree · willowtree

Has anyone heard about the law of attraction? I am getting stuck with how I can use it with alanon as well. My conflict is coming in because I feel like a lot of the LOA teachers speak as if we have all of this power with in us - but alanon teaches us we are powerless over others. I feel so conflicted because...

savvygirl · savvygirl

Hey everyone, I was linked to this site by a friend and I honestly have no idea if I'm posting in the right place or not. I've never looked into Al-Anon or anything of the sort because I've never felt the need to before. The alcoholic is my godfather, so he's not blood related but he was there during child...

robin1212 · robin1212

Hi, I've been through a lot with my AW and reading some of the posts on this site I have come to realise there is some hope for myself. I'm sitting in a hotel room now after another incident with AW and I feel that a great weight has been lifted of my shoulders. I've known my AW for just over 20 years and at the st...

bryteyes · bryteyes

My boyfriends dad died 16 years ago that he has issues with. My boyfriend has been doing good with his drinking but days like this not so much. This morning he started out positive so I hope it stays that way. He took extra money tho and has to walk passed all the liquor stores. Is there any key words that wou...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

We had court today for my 14 year old to get a permanent restraining order on a boy from her school that has been stalking her and had a few scary incidents. The judge approved the protective order and for the next 4 years if he shows up around here or harasses her in any way we can have him arrested. They stil...

texas yankee · texas yankee

I attend very helpful meetings with a mixed group of folks dealing with pretty typical AlAnon issues - some have spouse issues, some have "growing up in al alcoholic family" issues, some are parents with kid \ adult children issues - some of the folks in our AlAnon group want to have addit...

LiliesForPeace · LiliesForPeace

Hello all, I'm hoping I can gain some insight through this community. I have yet to attend a face-to-face AlAnon meeting, but will definitely be looking into meetings. I have never posted on this sort of site and am feeling rather embarrased to share my long story. I had been with my boyfriend for si...

Lammy · Lammy

Hi Al-Anon, I am living with a boyfriend that has had alcohol problems in the past, but that is "no longer an issue". I can't handle a relationship with an alcohol problem, and he occasionally acts odd, which makes me think he has been drinking something and hiding it, or maybe taking some...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Had a good weekend. I've decided to back off a little from my son. I'm getting envolved again and I don't want myself back into the crazyness...although there hasn't been any lately. We did have a nice Friday night going out to dinner and going to one of his meetings. He was listening so I hope he will c...

imom · imom

We are very near the end of our family unit as we know it. My AH has hit bottom...at least I hope it cannot get lower than this. He despises me right now because I am divorcing him and I called 911 on him and he keeps saying I am feeding lies about him to our children and everyone else. My kids want him out of the h...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

I have had my sponsor since July. I am working slowly through the steps and I try to contact her weekly. She works full time and has 2 other sponsees along with her own program to work and I know she's quite busy. I texted her on Christmas to wish her a good holiday and then again on New Year's to do the same...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hi Everyone, So, I am at my father's getting some laundry done. I come here to do it because he has the machine available and it gives me time to spend with him. I came over and he was passed out. He woke up and we began to chat. He went up to take a shower then came down more drunk than he was when he woke up. I can a...

imom · imom

I am very lonely tonight but really need to stop this pity party inside my head. Seeing happy families tonight has really hit me hard. I know in my sane mind that I am making the right decision to get off this crazy train, but I still have very sad moments where I wonder if it could ever go back to being good. I...

WorkingThroughIt · WorkingThroughIt

...may not show for some time. Whenever we are in doubt - don't. Wait for His say-so. Most people in recovery (including myself when I'm prideful & angry) will say to not tolerate being controlled etc. But my greatest teacher taught me to break DOWN my pride and tolerate. I'm at Mom & Dad's hous...

Aat · Aat

20 years this April. Can't even remember when life was 'normal'. Six years into our relationship, we adopted our son. That was what 'should come next' right? All downhill from there. I thought it was all about being new parents, but 4 years later the truth showed itself. By that time, I'd been out of the...

Ojwoman · Ojwoman

My son is married to an alcoholic who has recently been placed on two 72 hour hold in the last two weeks for suicidal ideation and depressions issues. In between her last two in patient stays, she was home with my son and their 4 month old daughter. During this time she swore she was taking Antabuse. Long s...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

Hello, yes it is me, Sarah, aka Tiger2006. I wanted to let y'all know, so y'all weren't like "OMG, did her account get hacked?" My AA sponsor told me to come back to al anon, so, I decided to take her suggestions....4 weeks after she made it. Anyway, I wanted to let you know it really is me here,...

teetree · teetree

I'm a total newbie and have not yet been to an alanon meeting so I thought I'd start sharing my story here. My husband is an alcoholic/drug addict/compulsive gambler (lottery). Initially he just drank but then when that became problematic and I made an issue of it he "quit" but actually beg...

Nicoledilo · Nicoledilo

I met this guy Michael only 3 weeks ago..but instantly I felt I needed to help him. When I met him all my friends told me he has done drugs and drinks a lot and a part of me didn't care and I talked to him anyway..most people would think I'm dumb for being drawn to that kind of person, but 2 years ago my father pas...

Highlyfavored · Highlyfavored

My A/A daughter just called to ask me to pick her up and give her a ride home, she said she was at herald college, an appt. to get GED or some training, and it took longer than she expected. She was very nice about it, I told her no, I had not been out of the house today, and didn't feel like it. Mind you I've tol...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Hi Everyone: It's been a while as I feel I have been embroiled in this sickness bigtime, especially the last 2 yrs of my 21 yr marriage. Where we are now: I thought I was practicing detachment and confused this with complete apathy...I was giving nothing to our marriage at all but deciding I had had en...

midas · midas

Hi folks, I married a man who'd been sober over 3 yrs. I only ever knew him as straight, sober & stable. We eloped in the spring but waited until October for a real wedding party. Little did I know that he drank one week before the wedding- a night I went for dinner with girlfriends- a night that he had hi...

abbyalana · abbyalana

I had been with my (now ex) AH for 23 years; since age 14 and physically separated for 6 months/divorced for 2. Over the years, he's been abusive, alcoholic, addicted to drugs...you name it - even attempting suicide and being arrested for domestic violence and taking anger management classes. I st...

AlAnonDave · AlAnonDave

Even though The whole Christmas phone tag thing was bothering me, I decided to call my Dad, and I'm glad I did. I do love my Dad but this whole thing every year is aggravating. But not enough to keep me from calling him. It was a nice conversation and I'll work a bit harder at staying in touch. Maybe one day we...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Hi all I don't know what's been happening but from just before Christmas until now my son has not drank. Didn't have him for Christmas but he did come over for New Years and we had a great time cooking ( he loves to cook) and watching movies. It's so nice when he is not drinking. He seems to have his head t...

oldergal · oldergal

Just like to say a big THANK YOU, to all the great sponsors out there. The ones who go out of their way to help, when its not convenient for them or their families, the ones online too who are in the wings ready to give some ESH, thanks for all you do....Oldergal

Abtmc · Abtmc

My husband decided to go to a basketball game after work tonight. He swore his drinking will be "under control" (he'll stick to 1 beer per hour) since he already has 2 DUIs and doesn't want to risk another. Am I the only one who thinks this is a joke/ridiculous/total denial??? And yet here I am...

cinders · cinders

I have been on a roller coaster yet wonderful at times emotional journey. I am a researcher. I read what ever I can get my hands on and become, at times, too obsessive with trying to gather as much information as possible. So, in my quest to try and understand, heal from and deal with my broken heart fro...

ItsMe · ItsMe

Hi, I am new to this world and am looking for support from people who have been there. My husband, whom I love very much has had substance abuse issues since we meet. I stupidly thought it was all fun of our youth, I grew up, but he still acts recklessly even though we have two children and a mortgage, high le...

one_moment · one_moment

I am having a very difficult time understanding the mind of a recovering (or so I am told) A. My AH is sober or at least that's what he tells me, but I find it very difficult to believe when lately he has been disappearing for a couple days at a time. He was home last night yet is gone today. I am going to f2f meet...

Josephine · Josephine

Hi all.....wish I'd found this forum a long time ago.....my husband has always drank, we met at 19 almost thirty years ago ...we have three beautiful adult children my youngest with special needs is 18 yrs old.....me being sooo busy with kids over the years I was blinded by how dependent to alcohol he w...

DellaB · DellaB

Hello, Wise Ones, Its been at least ten years since my last Al-Anon meeting. My husband and his two grown daughters are alcoholics. Through the years, Ive found Peace by keeping it simple and walking away from their drinking behavior when I can. I think of it as a tornado and its much safer from afar...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hi, my name is slogan_Jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon.Over the holidays I came to a bit of a realization. I have a hard time around families. A friend of mine had a birthday party at a restaurant and invited his whole extended family. His girlfriend also invited her parents.This is someone I hav...

daisy chain · daisy chain

I have something on my mind. I saw on the TV a programme about surrendering as a wife to improve your marriage. There is a web-site about it. What they endorse reminds me of Alanon, self care and letting husband get on with it. It's scaring me a makes me think of step ford wives. I think I sound a little mad, b...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Second Interview (Preview) Hello, my beloved MIPers! You may recall that my long-term temporary job ended on November 1. In mid-December I had an interview for a very, very good job with my county. Yesterday they called me and asked me to come in on Wednesday morning (tomorrow) to "meet with" the big cheese. I assu...	stephaniej	10	396	Jan 11, 2013 by orchidlover
	Quit expecting irrational people to suddenly behave rationally (Preview) I was reading through some posts and was reminded very clearly that A's do what A's do... and time and again folks like myself get bowled over in shock when we expect the A to suddenly behave like someone other than an A. I even had this experience with my exA. He called me back in October to let me know that h...	Aloha	5	546	Jan 11, 2013 by orchidlover
	Am I feeling sorry for myself? (Preview) The last 2 months have been really challenging for me. I planned my inlaws 50th wedding anniversary, it was Christmas, kept helping SO many people out to the point of exhaustion and then slight resentment, and my brother in law and his 3 kids stayed with us for a week. Having my BIL stay with us really p...	willowtree	8	561	Jan 11, 2013 by orchidlover
	why? (Preview) I've been thinking about why I ended up as a codependant enabler. At what point in my life did I become like this? Is it a self esteem issue? I think it comes from my childhood, I've always people pleased and was brought up like this. My ex ah and I were made for each other really, two mixed up people who got si...	el-cee	7	415	Jan 11, 2013 by orchidlover
	Court Results!!! (Preview) I know it's before the court time .. LOL .. that's OOOOKKKKK. Turns out my atty and her folks found out I didn't need to be there today. They have continued the case until??? Don't know that answer just yet. Suffice to say that doing the next right thing is a good thing. I highly encourage anyone deal...	Pushka	3	345	Jan 11, 2013 by orchidlover
	At a loss... (Preview) Rarely am i someone at a loss for words. However, i feel like i was hit with a stun gun lately. I paid to bring my 32 yr old son here to North Carolina after his marriage took the plunge. First thing he found was alcohol, then a girlfriend he got preg, then two felony charges for b&e at a closed store a few block...	John	9	536	Jan 11, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	Starting Again Today (Preview) I guess I've always liked hearing that "today is another chance to get it right." Of course this has mean't not only days of second chances but years of trying to make progress. I am sometimes better than other times but I know I will never get it "right." I'm not sure I even know w...	tiredtonite	5	497	Jan 10, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	First local meeting(s) (Preview) I made it to and through my first meeting and went to another yesterday. Thank you ALL for your encouragement to go! I felt like I should have signed in though with a big fat Crayon instead of a pen! :) But seriously, I could relate to so many, cried the whole time, and have felt numb since......but it i...	DellaB	10	388	Jan 9, 2013 by hotrod
	27 years & counting... (Preview) I just celebrated 27 years in the program on Friday! I am so grateful to this program; it has saved my life more than once--it can save & change your lives too. I have never been able to find anything that was more effective than alanon. It really is the best thing that has ever happened to me except the...	Hoot Nanny	4	372	Jan 9, 2013 by tiredtonite
	How to protect the kids? (Preview) Their father gets out of jail this month and I am wondering how to protect the kids from contact When it was just alcohol that was the addiction, I could tell when he was under the influence after one spoken word. Now that drugs are involved, I am unaware. I am concerned the drugs have done permanent br...	Gw	5	421	Jan 9, 2013 by stephaniej
	More questions? (Preview) My a/a daughter called, told me about the program to get her GED, before the conversation ended she asked if I had any pants or warmup suits she could have, she said she can't wear jeans to class. I told to go to the thrift store, she said she didn't have any $. She reminded of my surplus of clothes, I told h...	hightlyfavored	5	485	Jan 9, 2013 by el-cee
	I really need your support on this family problem brother evict (Preview) After my brother went through rehab, I allowed him to move into my house until he got on his feet. He was sober for the first year and I gave him all the support I could. But then he started drinking more and more. He just ruined our Christmas celebration for the 3rd year in a row -- as well as our Easter d...	frannix	9	1501	Jan 8, 2013 by frannix
	I did what was best for me (Preview) I have to say I am very proud of myself. When my AH and I seperated, I moved to a new house. He does not have the address, phone number or new email address. I chose to create a very large barrier in order to start finding my sanity and having as much division between us as possible. I was really hurt and th...	cinders	4	320	Jan 9, 2013 by Annie1234
	Ugh (Preview) Well, best laid plans. I attempted to go to my first F2F meeting today at 1:00. When I arrived at the location that was listed on the Al-Anon meeting website, I was told that they stopped having meetings there on Tuesday afternoons. I'm having such a rough time today, and really felt it was time for m...	Annie1234	6	423	Jan 8, 2013 by Annie1234
	Need of some words (Preview) All was well last night as I retired and I wake up to a message that my son had this burning desire to drink. He said he called his sponser but I don't know if it did any good or not. Can only pray Not doing so well this morning so I understand my need of continued support and help of Al-anon. I let my guard down...	Cathyinaz	8	330	Jan 8, 2013 by Breakingfree
	Another court day .. (Preview) It was another sleepless night last night each time I think I'm ok, I wind up with some weird dream I can't remember. Asking for prayers again my friends, .. I do not know the outcome .. I do know God is bigger and has a better plan. I have tried not to choose or push the "if you insist" door. It'...	Pushka	2	285	Jan 8, 2013 by Jackie11
	in the struggle. still...an update! (Preview) I want to share here today, for isolation is not good for me, and because sharing with some people in my life isn't always easy, and keeps them worrying, and sometimes they cannot understand the actual situation I am in, because they stand outside the madness. here in MIP I have been feeling safe since t...	tortuga	6	512	Jan 8, 2013 by tiredtonite
	Being honest with myself (Preview) So tonight I finally got to my first f2f meeting in a few months. I have made every excuse in the book about why I cannot get to them. I knew I would be late because I had to pick up my daughter from practice first, but I allowed myself to do that and walk in late. I was only ten minutes late and I still made it. I t...	imom	3	409	Jan 8, 2013 by Jozie
	can't let it go... (Preview) Hello this is my first time on here and looking for advice. My husband and i have been married 9 years and together 14 years (we are 33). We started dating when we were 19 and partied full on with alcohol and all kinds off drugs till we were 24 (got married). We started for baby and 2 miscarraiges and a year of...	amarchand	8	470	Jan 8, 2013 by amarchand
	Struggling to be patient, please help (Preview) My AH has been sober for 5 months now; 3 months in rehab and home for the past 2 months. He is doing really well and is very active in his AA and NA meetings, he has been approached to be someone's sponsor and he is really enjoying helping people. I have been working on my co-dependency and have really begun t...	Kismet	3	333	Jan 8, 2013 by Kismet
	Change in Perspective (Preview) I have been a grateful member here for over 2 years. In the past 18 months, during which my AH's drinking has escalated steadily, I have slowly worked toward detaching from his behavior. I have been feeling more and more like I am ready to leave him. One of the reasons I have been able to detach is that h...	stephaniej	3	304	Jan 8, 2013 by orchidlover
	Things can change so fast! (Preview) We met here at MIP, over ten years ago. He and I kept in communication over ten years, we were very close friends. Reminded each other of our Al Anon skills dealing with my now ex AH, and his soon to be ex AW. Kids are grown now and gone, he is done. Very sadly he has found the evidense of the drug use. We had seen...	Debilyn	5	565	Jan 8, 2013 by AlAnonDave
	the feelings come back (Preview) Since my AH has been going to AA and has been sober for 4weeks now, he is starting to do more around the house and thinks everyone else should too. Today he flipped his lid when he was trying to move a chair from the basement to the upstairs. While he was in the basement my younger son was down there playing...	1976love	8	381	Jan 8, 2013 by orchidlover
	God is bigger than me ... Share (Preview) You know you would think I would get that lesson and seriously it still boggles my mind. There are some freaky things going on at the moment. I have court tomorrow and I am asking for prayers. I feel like the best thing that could happen is (I know wait for it .. LOL) it would actually be delayed. I can't...	Pushka	6	428	Jan 8, 2013 by orchidlover
	I'm a newcomer and I have to say, this works (Preview) I've been to 5 or 6 meetings over the last few months, and just recently made the commitment to come at least once a week. I came to my first meeting in complete desperation, having just had another blow out argument with my husband, an active alcoholic / addict. The cycle was the same, he would be drunk wh...	ParisMemories	8	357	Jan 8, 2013 by orchidlover
	scared every time he walks out the door (Preview) Been with my verbally abusive AB for 2 years and although his drinking has slowed down extremely im still terrified of what could happen and find myself scared every time he walks out the door which is a lot because we have no transportation and he walks everywhere. Ive been diagnosed with PTSD just fro...	bryteyes	2	306	Jan 8, 2013 by orchidlover
	law of attraction and alanon question (Preview) Has anyone heard about the law of attraction? I am getting stuck with how I can use it with alanon as well. My conflict is coming in because I feel like a lot of the LOA teachers speak as if we have all of this power with in us - but alanon teaches us we are powerless over others. I feel so conflicted because...	willowtree	7	831	Jan 7, 2013 by Gette
	Newbie in need of encouragement drinkng (Preview) Hey everyone, I was linked to this site by a friend and I honestly have no idea if I'm posting in the right place or not. I've never looked into Al-Anon or anything of the sort because I've never felt the need to before. The alcoholic is my godfather, so he's not blood related but he was there during child...	savvygirl	1	470	Jan 7, 2013 by hotrod
	in the end nothing else matters (Preview) Hi, I've been through a lot with my AW and reading some of the posts on this site I have come to realise there is some hope for myself. I'm sitting in a hotel room now after another incident with AW and I feel that a great weight has been lifted of my shoulders. I've known my AW for just over 20 years and at the st...	robin1212	10	657	Jan 7, 2013 by Jozie
	needing support today (Preview) My boyfriends dad died 16 years ago that he has issues with. My boyfriend has been doing good with his drinking but days like this not so much. This morning he started out positive so I hope it stays that way. He took extra money tho and has to walk passed all the liquor stores. Is there any key words that wou...	bryteyes	2	313	Jan 7, 2013 by el-cee
	Court today and some victim thinking on my part (Preview) We had court today for my 14 year old to get a permanent restraining order on a boy from her school that has been stalking her and had a few scary incidents. The judge approved the protective order and for the next 4 years if he shows up around here or harasses her in any way we can have him arrested. They stil...	Breakingfree	6	398	Jan 7, 2013 by Debilyn
	Minimum requirements for an Al Anon meeting? (Preview) I attend very helpful meetings with a mixed group of folks dealing with pretty typical AlAnon issues - some have spouse issues, some have "growing up in al alcoholic family" issues, some are parents with kid \ adult children issues - some of the folks in our AlAnon group want to have addit...	texas yankee	6	852	Jan 7, 2013 by hotrod
	Newcomer at a crossroads (Preview) Hello all, I'm hoping I can gain some insight through this community. I have yet to attend a face-to-face AlAnon meeting, but will definitely be looking into meetings. I have never posted on this sort of site and am feeling rather embarrased to share my long story. I had been with my boyfriend for si...	LiliesForPeace	2	742	Jan 7, 2013 by hotrod
	I'm not sure if he's drinking.... (Preview) Hi Al-Anon, I am living with a boyfriend that has had alcohol problems in the past, but that is "no longer an issue". I can't handle a relationship with an alcohol problem, and he occasionally acts odd, which makes me think he has been drinking something and hiding it, or maybe taking some...	Lammy	3	316	Jan 7, 2013 by Lammy
	Doing something for yourself (Preview) Had a good weekend. I've decided to back off a little from my son. I'm getting envolved again and I don't want myself back into the crazyness...although there hasn't been any lately. We did have a nice Friday night going out to dinner and going to one of his meetings. He was listening so I hope he will c...	Cathyinaz	1	302	Jan 7, 2013 by oldergal
	Nearing the end (Preview) We are very near the end of our family unit as we know it. My AH has hit bottom...at least I hope it cannot get lower than this. He despises me right now because I am divorcing him and I called 911 on him and he keeps saying I am feeding lies about him to our children and everyone else. My kids want him out of the h...	imom	4	407	Jan 7, 2013 by Josephine
	Question about sponsors/sponsees relationship (Preview) I have had my sponsor since July. I am working slowly through the steps and I try to contact her weekly. She works full time and has 2 other sponsees along with her own program to work and I know she's quite busy. I texted her on Christmas to wish her a good holiday and then again on New Year's to do the same...	ilovedogs	2	380	Jan 7, 2013 by Pushka
	delaying his return to work (Preview) Hi Everyone, So, I am at my father's getting some laundry done. I come here to do it because he has the machine available and it gives me time to spend with him. I came over and he was passed out. He woke up and we began to chat. He went up to take a shower then came down more drunk than he was when he woke up. I can a...	slogan_jim	2	304	Jan 7, 2013 by slogan_jim
	Not alone but lonely (Preview) I am very lonely tonight but really need to stop this pity party inside my head. Seeing happy families tonight has really hit me hard. I know in my sane mind that I am making the right decision to get off this crazy train, but I still have very sad moments where I wonder if it could ever go back to being good. I...	imom	4	374	Jan 6, 2013 by Auntyaya
	What God Wants Us To See (Preview) ...may not show for some time. Whenever we are in doubt - don't. Wait for His say-so. Most people in recovery (including myself when I'm prideful & angry) will say to not tolerate being controlled etc. But my greatest teacher taught me to break DOWN my pride and tolerate. I'm at Mom & Dad's hous...	WorkingThroughIt	4	354	Jan 6, 2013 by AStrongerMe
	20 years of 'marriage' (Preview) 20 years this April. Can't even remember when life was 'normal'. Six years into our relationship, we adopted our son. That was what 'should come next' right? All downhill from there. I thought it was all about being new parents, but 4 years later the truth showed itself. By that time, I'd been out of the...	Aat	4	427	Jan 6, 2013 by GreenerGrass
	Alcoholic daughter in law Ojwoman (Preview) My son is married to an alcoholic who has recently been placed on two 72 hour hold in the last two weeks for suicidal ideation and depressions issues. In between her last two in patient stays, she was home with my son and their 4 month old daughter. During this time she swore she was taking Antabuse. Long s...	Ojwoman	5	3804	Jan 6, 2013 by Jerry F
	I'm back! (Preview) Hello, yes it is me, Sarah, aka Tiger2006. I wanted to let y'all know, so y'all weren't like "OMG, did her account get hacked?" My AA sponsor told me to come back to al anon, so, I decided to take her suggestions....4 weeks after she made it. Anyway, I wanted to let you know it really is me here,...	Tiger2006	7	331	Jan 6, 2013 by Peggy7
	How do I really let go and focus on myself? (Preview) I'm a total newbie and have not yet been to an alanon meeting so I thought I'd start sharing my story here. My husband is an alcoholic/drug addict/compulsive gambler (lottery). Initially he just drank but then when that became problematic and I made an issue of it he "quit" but actually beg...	teetree	4	1265	Jan 6, 2013 by teetree
	He doesn't care (Preview) I met this guy Michael only 3 weeks ago..but instantly I felt I needed to help him. When I met him all my friends told me he has done drugs and drinks a lot and a part of me didn't care and I talked to him anyway..most people would think I'm dumb for being drawn to that kind of person, but 2 years ago my father pas...	Nicoledilo	5	520	Jan 6, 2013 by Breakingfree
	Losing ability to know next right thing to do! Help!! (Preview) My A/A daughter just called to ask me to pick her up and give her a ride home, she said she was at herald college, an appt. to get GED or some training, and it took longer than she expected. She was very nice about it, I told her no, I had not been out of the house today, and didn't feel like it. Mind you I've tol...	Highlyfavored	7	717	Jan 6, 2013 by Breakingfree
	I'm baaack! And need some help (Preview) Hi Everyone: It's been a while as I feel I have been embroiled in this sickness bigtime, especially the last 2 yrs of my 21 yr marriage. Where we are now: I thought I was practicing detachment and confused this with complete apathy...I was giving nothing to our marriage at all but deciding I had had en...	yanksfan51	8	524	Jan 6, 2013 by yanksfan51
	Newbie here- introducing myself newbie introduction first post triggers (Preview) Hi folks, I married a man who'd been sober over 3 yrs. I only ever knew him as straight, sober & stable. We eloped in the spring but waited until October for a real wedding party. Little did I know that he drank one week before the wedding- a night I went for dinner with girlfriends- a night that he had hi...	midas	5	4472	Jan 6, 2013 by midas
	Sometimes I feel a little crazy (Preview) I had been with my (now ex) AH for 23 years; since age 14 and physically separated for 6 months/divorced for 2. Over the years, he's been abusive, alcoholic, addicted to drugs...you name it - even attempting suicide and being arrested for domestic violence and taking anger management classes. I st...	abbyalana	4	600	Jan 5, 2013 by milkwood
	I elected to call my father tonight (Preview) Even though The whole Christmas phone tag thing was bothering me, I decided to call my Dad, and I'm glad I did. I do love my Dad but this whole thing every year is aggravating. But not enough to keep me from calling him. It was a nice conversation and I'll work a bit harder at staying in touch. Maybe one day we...	AlAnonDave	2	386	Jan 5, 2013 by hotrod
	Tonight (Preview) Hi all I don't know what's been happening but from just before Christmas until now my son has not drank. Didn't have him for Christmas but he did come over for New Years and we had a great time cooking ( he loves to cook) and watching movies. It's so nice when he is not drinking. He seems to have his head t...	Cathyinaz	7	522	Jan 5, 2013 by Jerry F
	AWESOME SPONSORS (Preview) Just like to say a big THANK YOU, to all the great sponsors out there. The ones who go out of their way to help, when its not convenient for them or their families, the ones online too who are in the wings ready to give some ESH, thanks for all you do....Oldergal	oldergal	3	311	Jan 5, 2013 by Jerry F
	Always nervous (Preview) My husband decided to go to a basketball game after work tonight. He swore his drinking will be "under control" (he'll stick to 1 beer per hour) since he already has 2 DUIs and doesn't want to risk another. Am I the only one who thinks this is a joke/ridiculous/total denial??? And yet here I am...	Abtmc	7	453	Jan 5, 2013 by wp
	Living in the present (Preview) I have been on a roller coaster yet wonderful at times emotional journey. I am a researcher. I read what ever I can get my hands on and become, at times, too obsessive with trying to gather as much information as possible. So, in my quest to try and understand, heal from and deal with my broken heart fro...	cinders	5	475	Jan 5, 2013 by hotrod
	Advice? Please.. Newbie (Preview) Hi, I am new to this world and am looking for support from people who have been there. My husband, whom I love very much has had substance abuse issues since we meet. I stupidly thought it was all fun of our youth, I grew up, but he still acts recklessly even though we have two children and a mortgage, high le...	ItsMe	6	567	Jan 5, 2013 by orchidlover
	What do you think? (Preview) I am having a very difficult time understanding the mind of a recovering (or so I am told) A. My AH is sober or at least that's what he tells me, but I find it very difficult to believe when lately he has been disappearing for a couple days at a time. He was home last night yet is gone today. I am going to f2f meet...	one_moment	6	491	Jan 5, 2013 by midas
	Newbie......Australia......it's near the end.....very painful (Preview) Hi all.....wish I'd found this forum a long time ago.....my husband has always drank, we met at 19 almost thirty years ago ...we have three beautiful adult children my youngest with special needs is 18 yrs old.....me being sooo busy with kids over the years I was blinded by how dependent to alcohol he w...	Josephine	4	395	Jan 5, 2013 by Josephine
	Amends gone bad (Preview) Hello, Wise Ones, Its been at least ten years since my last Al-Anon meeting. My husband and his two grown daughters are alcoholics. Through the years, Ive found Peace by keeping it simple and walking away from their drinking behavior when I can. I think of it as a tornado and its much safer from afar...	DellaB	8	613	Jan 4, 2013 by DellaB
	I feel I am isolating (Preview) Hi, my name is slogan_Jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon.Over the holidays I came to a bit of a realization. I have a hard time around families. A friend of mine had a birthday party at a restaurant and invited his whole extended family. His girlfriend also invited her parents.This is someone I hav...	slogan_jim	4	477	Jan 4, 2013 by xeno59
	Surrender (Preview) I have something on my mind. I saw on the TV a programme about surrendering as a wife to improve your marriage. There is a web-site about it. What they endorse reminds me of Alanon, self care and letting husband get on with it. It's scaring me a makes me think of step ford wives. I think I sound a little mad, b...	daisy chain	3	326	Jan 4, 2013 by daisy chain
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.