Left the A. several messages last week-one apologizing for giving him crap and the other to thank him for telling me about a certain hiking path-it was so beautiful.

Didn't hear back.  Didn't expect to.

I started moving my stuff to the new place back home.  He knows nothing about this move.  No reason to tell him-we're not in contact.  After a lot of hemming and hawing I felt positive about this move and decided it also had the added bonus of no distractions for either of us-he is here working on him, and I would be there working on me.

I happened to notice his car was back at his apartment there last night.  So much for distractions.

It's still good, I'm not changing my plans because of him.  This is the best thing for me.  That is why I am doing it.

However, it is bringing me back to anticipating the future and thinking about the past...and looking for motives.

He left everything there to get sober and work the steps.  This is the only place he can do so with a support system.  He has nothing there for a support system-other than AA.  He has a boss who has told him he will always have a job-no matter how much he drinks or how often he shows up.  He has a landlord who will let him slide on the rent, move out after a week, and then come back.  He has a world of lifelong friends and acquaintances who are all alcoholics or addicts. 

Chances are, realistically, that he is thinking about drinking. 

I don't know that he even told me the truth about why he was down here.  It all could've just been a lie to begin with.  Who knows what he actually told his family, and if he ever even really called his sober friend?

And being with me last week probably did some damage if he was hoping to get back with her. 

And I am back to questioning everything again.

I've heard it said that alcoholics (and others) blame others for their mistakes.  He blames his drinking on everything.  Everything that goes wrong is because he was drinking.  Never does he say he screwed up. 

The difference this time, I am keeping my mouth shut and continuing on with what I was doing.  Time will tell.