The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
For the first time in a long time i went to sleep feeling as if i knew someone who understands me-i am going to make it a mission to go to a meeting-i was wondering if i could get some info from you guys- 1. Do i have to start with a newcomers meeting?
2.Can i attend a closed meeting if its my first time attending a meeting? I read that it said it was for people whose life had been hurt by A. I am one
3. do they have something for kids age 9
I have looked up meeting times and if i dont make it by monday i will attend one on my lunch break monday-Thank you to everyone who replied to my last post.It is definitly amazing how much better i felt last nite-My AH even came into the room last nite while i was reading peoples story,he was'nt drinking but having a bad attitude as he usally does when he can't drink-He made some comments on OH Man your looking at stuff about that and I said go away this is not for you for once this is for me and I am happy about it. Thank you whoever started this, i at least know someone else is going through what i am!!!!
Welcome to Miracles In Progress! Good for you, this program is for you - not to help your husband. He's the only one who can help himself.
In answer to your questions, from my experience.
1) No you can go to any Al-anon meeting. It does not have to be a newcomers meeting. However if you find one, they sure are helpful for the many questions you will have.
2) Closed meetings simply mean that for professionals such as physiciatrists or others studying the effects of alcoholism are not welcome to these meetings. They can go to open meetings and in my area, they are supposed to identify themselves when we ask if there are any newcomers attending.
As a person affected by someone's drinking (whoever that may be) you are welcomed at any meeting.
3) A 9 year old - I'd suggest an Ala-tot meeting (though they are very hard to find and are few and far in between). There are also Ala-teen meetings (again hard to find but more numerous than Ala-tot meetings). As you know, teenagers have a whole other range of "issues" than a 9 year old. I would however suggest you order the book "What's drunk, Mama" to start to help your child understand the affects of alcoholism.
And just know that chances are you are going to get a lot of "kickback" from your hubby regarding this. They hate the fact that they have a drinking problem (though that's hard for us to believe in the beginning). They also hate the fact that we have found help. Things will begin to change once only one member of a family begins to seek help. The whole family dynamics will start to change.
So, welcome to Alanon. Get to a meeting no matter what. They were a life saver for me. I attend face to face meetings and come here to the boards and attend the chat meetings here. Alanon is now my "family of choice" where I have learned so much. I have matured in Alanon and am proud of the woman I am today and love the woman I am today. I hope that for you too.
yours in recovery, Maria123
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If I am not for me, who will be? If I am only for myself, then who am I? If not now, when?
Faith! That is fantastic. I think Maria gave yousome good input on your questions. I just wanted to take a chance to give you a big (((((HUG)))))) and so glad you are here, my new friend.
See, you've only been here a short time, and you're making progress already! Way to go!
Newcomers meeting are only so you can learn the jargon of Al anon and some of our tools. They are not mandatory. You are encouraged to go to Al Anon period. To supplement this with open AA meetings.
Heck yes go to closed meetings. Closed simply means that only people whose lives have been affected by drugs and alchol can attend. No visitors please.
Some areas have ala teen/ala tot. Some do not. Perhaps your 9 y.o. would benefit if your area has ala teen/ala tot. If it doesn't, perhaps give them some ala teen literature.
