If I understand your post, what I'm hearing is that "How do I protect the anonymoty of others, while sharing the message of al anon?" 

 In truth I haven't met anyone that hasn't gone into this field w/o having some how become associated with it. There are numerous alcholics that are now substance abuse councelors themselves; and you are a witness to the fact that families of the dysfunction can be witnesses to the family substance abuse counceling. When we discuss the anonymoty of al anon, what we're really asking about is that 1) we don't keep a membership roster--at no time is anyone gonna find any paper work any where that says who was where when at which meeting; 2)we discuss our organization in a general way, emphasising attraction not promotion--we use advertising gimmicks such as "is some one's drinking tearing your life apart? Al anon can help!"; "do you feel painted in a corner by someone's drinking? Ala teen can help!". These kind of slogans only offer to someone *who could click with them, someone whose life actually has been affected by another's drinking* a sense of, "Hey! Don't walk the road alone! Ever heard of al anon?" And ultimately, if you notice, these advertisements run in magazines, on TV, on radios *only in Sept, when our confrence has agreed to use funds, encourage the groups and designate members to go out and publicly discuss al anon; this is our public out  reach month when we give out literature to the professional community, when we beef up our meetings as an attempt to out reach, et cetera. After Sept, that's it.*   We consider "the seed planted" and let go, let god.

 As for your concerns about "attraction not promotion" keep in mind that alcholics find themselves in AA because of their liver, their lover, or their lawyer: someone, with some percieved power over them tells them "Get sober or else." You're not necessarily in that situation but what you are saying is, "I go there. They've given me solutions to manage my life. I've found ways to live with my life." And ultimately, remember, we may be the only symbol of the 12 steps someone ever sees.

 Lastly, about your husband--the only time I've ever heard someone genuinely express concern about their anonymoty was a high class atty who knew he had a drinking problem, and wanted help. But he refused AA because he didn't trust the people. The vast majority of the alcholics I've met take the attitude of "My biggest secret was the one I kept from myself, and I was the only one that didn't know it." You're not your husband. Your fine.

hi dear, I feel you are doing wonderfully.

If this were me, I would ask my employer if it would be ok to have alanon and AA pamphlets on my desk to give out.

You don't have to reveal you are in alanon.

You could say, you know 12 step programs can help everyone. All of us know someone who has the disease of alcoholism. Believe me, I relate.

This is wonderful of you to care. As far as being Codep. as long as you are not giving too much of yourself and exausted, you are doing your job with your heart and your skills.

Same goes with anyone in social services, nurses, doctors, counselors and even teachers.

If you can go home and leave the job at work, great! If not, then only you know where you must make boundaries.

Hugs. love,debilyn

I think its pretty simple to keep the A's anonymity in a situation where you're introducing Al-Anon to someone. We don't need to say who is the alcoholic, we can simply say a friend or family member (if we even feel it necessary to say that much).

I was first introduced to Al-Anon when I was sitting outside my office having lunch and another secretary sat down with me. I was upset about something and must have mentioned the alcoholic situation. This woman told me she could totally understand, she had experienced a lot of problems also in her previous marriage, she simply began to share her story with me and said that she went to Al-Anon which "saved her life". Looking at her that day, you would never have thought she'd gone through the hell we go through without any recovery, I mean here she was this bright, happy, laughing, engaged to be married to a wonderful man who loved her daughters as his own, funny, compassionate, simply lovely woman. Her life, the one she was living that very day, reflected her program. Attraction, not promotion. I never brought the subject up again, she never pushed it on me again. She did always ask how I was when we'd see each other.

I didn't go to Al-Anon right after that. It took me another 2 years to get here. But she planted the seed. That's all it took. One simple share over lunch. I will always be grateful she opened her heart to me and shared her story.

Luv, Kis