The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I know that when an AA is active in his/her addiction, they don’t care about much i.e.; work, family, themselves and life in general.
What I’m confused about is: if the AA in your life is working on sobriety and working the steps going to meetings, going to work but can’t deal with anything but these priorities. He or she is unable and may not have the emotional stability or mental energy to deal with anything else? Also could this AA possibly be moody and angry and depressed even with 7 months of sobriety? Possibly say things and do things that could hurt others in life who aren’t AA’s? In other words what they do or say may not have a lot of significance to it? So we should not take things so personally? So, we have to find more patience and more compassion then what we have been giving?
Could it be that I finally after all these months understand a tiny bit of what the AA is going through? Or I’m incorrect completely?
It talks about this in the Big Book and How Alanon Works. It takes a lot of effort in sobriety. One thing is that everything is new to them because they are use to facing everything not sober. They could also be a dry drunk ie emotionally underdeveloped. For myself, dealing with my AHsober for 22 years has been at times way more difficult than dealing with him not sober. BUT sobriety is a gift for them and for us.
You are absolutely getting it! One has to remember that all those feelings that the A was trying to mask when they were drinking are now not "numbed" by it. They have all these feelings to deal with.
My hubby has 60 days (tomorrow) and has had long periods of sobriety before. I see a change in him this time that I haven't seen in other periods. He can get a bit grumpier towards the evenings, and sometimes some old behaviors rear their ugly heads, but for only short periods. I just try and give him a bit of space and let him work it out. It does help him that besides his meetings he has a mental health program.
One great thing we do is go to AA meetings together. I started going first when he got out of the hospital this last time and he was afraid to go alone in case he needed me. Now it's because we like going together. It has helped me gain perspective and understanding of his disease from his side. It has also made us closer. I encourage you if you can to attend some open AA meetings. They are eye-opening, insightful and hopeful. It's like a went off when I started listening to other people's stories. I knew my A's, but I didn't know others.
Remember to keep working your program too. A relationship with an Active A vs. Sober A is different. I am finding that I need my program now more than ever now.
Love and blessings to you.
Live strong,
Karilynn
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It's your life. Take no prisoners. You will have it your way.
I just try and give him a bit of space and let him work it out. It does help him that besides his meetings he has a mental health program. 
went off when I started listening to other people's stories. I knew my A's, but I didn't know others. 