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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Needing some advice
Post Info TOPIC: Needing some advice
LALA1


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Needing some advice
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I wanted to know if anyone could help me on the topic of a sponsor.  I am still fairly new to alanon and I am really trying to learn as much as I can.  I have been reading constantly and I am finally ready to try to change for me and me only,  I can say the past few days I have felt more at peace than I have in a long time.  I am finally trying to work on me and stop worrying about him all the time.  I know this will take time and a lot of work.  I have been too some f2f meetings and there are only a few people at the ones I have been too so far.  I want to work on my steps and I would like to have the guidance of a sponsor.  This is hard with it only being a few people at the meetings I have been too.  I am going to try to go to more and I just found out about a co-dependency meeting 2 nights a week so I am going to attend those also.  I wanted to know is it better to have a sponsor f2f or can you have one online and talk on the phone??  I would really like to know some thoughts about this because I am still trying to learn.



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Take one dy at a time.....
Jerry F


~*Service Worker*~

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Aloha Lala1 !!


It's exciting to watch a person go after recovery and listen to their desire for better.  Face to Face sponsors are more effective for lots of honest reasons.  I chose sponsors for what they had that I did'nt have and wanted.  I chose sponsors that had more time than I and who were not likely to give into my early control and manipulation (this was not an easy program for me in the beginning.)  I knew sooooo little especially about me and I needed so much and therefore I needed to be around open and honest sponsors who were courageous enough to confront my insanity.  At first it was never fun but I wasn't looking for fun at first I was looking for something or someone to save my life. 


Fun comes now!!  Happy, joyous and free is now!!


You can also get support from others from where ever you find it if you are honest and willing to change your mind, body, spirit and emotions from sick to well and focus on recovery.


I don't know how long you've been in program or searching for a sponsor.  However long it's been? turn the process over to your Higher Power and use patience and open mindedness.  "The teacher(s) arrive when the student is ready."  I have had many sponsors over the years.  All of them possessed some characteristic I needed to replace one of my own that wasn't useful in trying to live within the disease of addiction.  This is what has helped me.  At one time I had a sponsor and two spiritual advisors (not gurus) that reattached me to my Higher Power.  They knew more about that relationship than I ever had at that time.


Ask HP for guidence as you search.  Shop around and ask questions.  If you find one that doesn't work out? go to the next one and then the next until you find the help you need. 


Keep coming back cause there is great support here........((((((hugs))))))  


 



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nycbt


~*Service Worker*~

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Welcome to MIP
Chat room is open 24/7 there here the link to www.mipchat.net or http://www.12stepforums.net/chatroom2.html
 
 
Ways to get a sponsor

  • If the person has complete there 12 steps
    Place to meet a sponsor



  • Has some time in the program

  • Has a sponsor there self

  • Person u will be able to talk to

Place to meet a sponsor

  • Online post board

  • Online chat room

  • Face to face meeting

A GOOD SPONOSR


 



  • Someone that accepts u for what u are ,Believes in u, Keeps in touch with u, Doesn’t give up on u, Doesn’t judge u, Someone that helps u look at ur self, loves u no matter what, Doesn’t try to run your life

  • Make a difference in your life and help u see your mistakes

  • Offers support by Listening and supporting u

  • Says nice things to u about ur self

  • Honest with u, Understand u, Values you

  • Walk with u through all ur good and bad times

  • the best thing you can do is stick around a bit, listen in meetings and find someone you can relate too someone who's program you can respect

  • be selective its important someone who has the kinda program you want works the steps


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Hey everyone watch me grow. I go thru good & bad times. each day i am getting stronger.
rosie light shines


~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 729
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fac2fac is best,  but i had  all my sponsers  either on line or on phones.....


i surfed the posts,  looked at all the ones that i "resonated"  with and when i was ready to make decision, i asked them


now if someone said  "NO"   i figured it was cuz they didn't think they could offer me anything...so don't take it personally if one says  "NO"......just keep surfing and u will find...


i have a co-sponser now and we do ok together..........hope this helped....rosie



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rosie light shines
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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Needing some advice