The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
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information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
should you be struggling with what you surrendered....or does it mean you did not totally surrender. What I mean is....if you ask God to have your problems and have trouble not taking them back...is that truly surrender?
I've been practicing surrendering lately, and I am still very much a beginner at it.
What helps me is to give up one, smaller part of the larger problem and surrender it fully. With time, I'm hoping to be able to give up more and more. Giving up a smaller piece (rather than the whole she-bang), helps me to really release it and not take it back. I find that I'm still in the place where I hand over the whole huge problem, or my whole life, I'll hand it it over for 30 seconds LOL and snatch it back. I try to remember progress not perfection!
I have a ton of faith in God's perfect plan for my life, in knowing my suffering here cannot ever equal the supreme unimaginable fulfillment that I will have with Him when I die.
I have surrendered myself, my worries, my agony, my troubles to God over and over...He wants us to come to him, build our own personal relationship with him AND He knows that we are not perfect, He burdened us or blessed us, however you want to look at it, with free will.
It is NEVER easy to trust God all the time, though we know we should and we know we can. I know that I can come to him with the honesty of my soul, my deepest desires and most agonizing heartaches and that He will listen to me, He will show me the path He intends me to walk and that He loves me and will never give me more or less than I need to grown into the person He wants me to become.
SO, yes, once we give it to God, we have no need to think on it further, BUT He wants us to talk to Him and trust in Him, so I say if it is on your heart and you need relief there is no better outlet than trusting God and relying on His perfect plan for you too.
I am still learning daily from the wisdom of others on this site but it is amazing how much I can put into other areas of my life from simple al alanon principles. Today I had a major hiccup with flight plans and was woken up with a 7.00am call to say the only flight between my town and another that I was booked on had been cancelled for operational reasons. I calmly said to myself there is a reason for this I am not going to get angry. Even when things looked like I wa going to be stranded and not able to get home I said it is not the girl on the phones fault remain calm. Everything worked out fine in the end and I even thanked them for being so helpful. I say to HP I don't know why this is happening but I trust that everything will be okay. Hope I haven't confused you even more. Luv Leo xxx
I find that usually when we speak or ask questions, we are already answering our own questions. Yes, if you are trying to take it back it isn't completely surrenderred.
I think it is like forgiveness, when we have 3 tons to let go of, expecting to snap a finger & have it all gone, vanished is a bit much... new ways of behaving, chosing to act & not react, this is all new for us after a life time of being molded into 'good little enablers' willing to be martyred takes daily practise.
For a while I was having to stop & pray, saying, "God I freely & willingly surrender this negative feeling or obsessing about that incident or surrenderring another person to You HP" many & several times a day. Now it happens less that I have to recall I'm human & forgive myself for loving someone else more than myself but I keep at it.
Those that know me here, I am the Queen of slips, I was in Al-Anon for 2 years when I was 17 & had a 19 yr slip, then came flying, screaming & crying back into this Program, I sure don't 'know it all.' At least this last slip was 2-3 months and I'm back, so I'd say that's a huge improvement.
In my experience, just do it over & over, it will begin to take effect & you will feel a difference & get to where you are finding yourself doing it less often. One thing I did learn about my exp w/ HP is that b/c was have freedom of choice, God won't take anything from us we have to offer it up freely & instantly it is received (even if you have to do it every 25 minutes a day at first.
You had the awareness of it creeping back into your mind or realizing you haven't let it go completely, so you're 1/2way there. So many never come out of denial. When we completely, wholly, truly surrender ~ it doesn't come back.
Love, a sis in recovery, -Kitty of Light
-- Edited by kitty at 18:44, 2006-06-01
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Light, Love, Peace, Blessings & Healing to Us All. God's Will Be Done. Amen.
