The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Like the author of this page, I had great difficulty accepting that alcoholism was a disease. It seemed like it was a choice--to drink or not. The author heard that alcoholism was similar to Alzheimer's. We see the person we know and love slipping away, they become more irrational and difficult to be around, and eventually we resent them. Once accepting the "disease" framework, it is easier to separate the disease from the person. And of course we are powerless except to focus on ourselves and our own growth.
I'm not sure how long it took me to accept this, but certainly when I did see my spouse as a person who is ill, it did help. I also had to accept how ill I had become as a result, and needed just as much work. Well I'm still in alanon, almost 14 years now. I consider it one of the best decisions I have made. I keep coming back because the damage is so deep, I can't really get free of it all. But I certainly make progress, one day at a time.
Hi Lyne, I can so relate to your sharing,for me 'Accepting Alcoholism" being a Disease. By the time I was given Al-Anon, and being affected in my childhood, I already had an awful lot of anger, pain, to find myself in a Marriage, full of violence, also a very, very strong will. My HP had to bend my knees, make me become pliable and then become teachable.
On looking back on my earlier journey in Al-Anon, I could see myself so determined that this Disease wasn't going to beat me, I was a fighter, and didn't give in easy. But after awhile I realized that I was acting like a Steam Roller, and guess who got rolled, me. My HP had started to get through to me, making me see what I was doing, and how much pain I was causing myself. It took me an awfully long time to get Step One, but I kept coming back, and finally I was able to separate the person from the Disease.
Now because I have the Wisdom, I have a lot of compassion, love and caring for others, who walk a different path that I do. Simply because I can understand the dynamics of the Disease. The gratitude I feel for Al-Anon is up to the Moon and back.
