The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
The writer shares an experience about learning detachment with love. Her husband fell out of bed often. When she first heard the idea of detachment, she stopped helping him back in bed. But as she learned about detachment with love, from that point on she still left him on the floor, but covered him with a blanket.
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I had a situation with my A where most nights my sleep was disturbed by my A making large movements with arms and legs and talking very loudly while sleeping. I learned from my therapist with alcohol training, that this is common with alcoholics. Since I've resigned from the Doormat Club, I decided I needed to take some action. I could sleep in another room, but I thought that a lesser action to try first was to put a very large body pillow between us. And that worked very well. I'm rephrasing from the quote, but detachment is not isolating or a wall; it can be a bridge to life and relationships.
Thanks Lyne for this reading and your share. Thanks to Al-anon and increased understanding of alcoholism as an illness. Working the program continues to help me check my motivates for my actions. Working through resentments, seeing the person under the illness of alcoholism helps with feelings of anger, hurt, disappointment. Choosing compassionate actions rather than retaliatory actions is Al-anon progress.
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Surround yourself with people and elements that support your destiny, not just your history.