The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I have learned that when something insignificant,like the lid not being on the toothpaste,is blown out of proportion it means there are other,major things going on that need to be addressed. While at the time it may feel/seem like it's actually the toothpaste it's not. When I take a look at what's really going on then I can find ways to work through whatever it is. And if it's something that can't be resolved or changed right away then I need to use coping skills/this program to get through it.
I honestly thought not living with an A anymore would instantly transform my life. Well, I guess it actually did transform it in many different ways but it didn't transform me into an instantly rational,sane person. That's going to take a lifetime of work. But it can only be done one day at a time.
Thanks DM for your service and to you and Sunnyfrog for your shares. To "live this day only," is enough for me. Grateful to practice Step 11 one day at a time, sometimes one hour at a time even one minute at a time. Working Step 11, I'm no as easily overwhelmed when met with multiple challenges. My best progress has come from admitting I can't do it alone, don't have all the answers and asking my hp and others for help. Some rewards of asking for help have been that it's created a "loving interchange" between myself and my higher power, opened my mind to soliciting and trusting people's skills and talents rather than just my own. It's gives me opportunities to learn and share that I would otherwise not have. Grateful to have progressed from human doing to human just being ;)
__________________
Surround yourself with people and elements that support your destiny, not just your history.
Happy Friday! Thank you Debbie for your service and all shares. For me, the little thing was being asked what's for lunch, dinner the minute I entered the house. First I would let out a big sigh followed by a sarcastic remark. I would prepare the meal of choice for my master making sure he knew this was a great hardship. I realized over time I resented doing something he could have done for himself and my attitude easily turned a simple request into grounds for divorce. First I gave up the sigh and sarcasm. Then I asked that in future, wait until I've taken a breather before making meal requests. Sometimes he'll text me to pick up something so I don't have to bother with cooking (yay) It has taught me to set clear boundaries on what works best for me in other areas and has improved my communication skills...sigh...of relief (lol)
Thanks Debbie for your service and all the ESH above. Yes, change takes time, and time takes time. That's why one day at a time, one hour at a time, and one minute at a time, all make sense to me and provide me with help changing my attitude. Attitude and acceptance are also important. Grateful member always.
