The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
This honest writer admitted they would likely be judged insane if observed while interacting with the alcoholic. A combination of poor behavior and poor state of mind were the results of trying to control alcohol with reason or force of will.
Restoration of sanity was the promise, a higher power was the means, and Alanon was the way. We may lose our way at times, but with Alanon we know how to get back.
Reminder: Today, focus on my own behavior and ask my higher power for help.
"If we do not change our direction, we are likely to end up where we are headed." - Chinese proverb ---------------- This was so me...a bellowing bull, announcing, denouncing, pronouncing judgments, searching for bottles, demanding, commanding, feeling justified yet finally reaching the point of complete and utter defeat.
I felt insane, trying to control alcohol left me willing to admit my powerlessness, and willing to try something different, something with more wisdom, power, answers than I had.
Since my journey with Alanon began, my times of felt distress are always traceable to attempts to control other people or situations...every time. The answer is also the same: Live and Let Live, Let it Begin with Me.
The program is simple, yet when I am willing and hold to the basics, it has a 100% success rate.
Grateful for the reminders
__________________
Paul
"...when we try to control others, we lose the ability to manage our own lives." - Paths to Recovery
Thanks Paul for your service and all above ESH. Oh how the insanity of the dance with my A controlled my life for many years. I chose behaviors I had never done before looking for lies and drinking behavior. I was desperate to "fix" things which of course, was impossible. Alanon was my last hope, and what a brave and good choice this has turned out to be! Came to program to change my A, and am learning how to fix me. Just this morning, unhappy about something my spouse did, I recited to myself, Bless them, change me. And that's what it's all about!
Thanks Paul for the reading and to all for the shares. Such an important reading about control. Before recovery, daily living felt a bit like an out of body experience. I was overly involved in the lives of others rather than self focused. Unlike the non recovery behaviors I displayed as a newcomer to Al-anon, I can make better choices today by self-regulating thoughts, words and actions. Instead of catastrophizing, then reacting impulsively, I've learned to stop, breathe and check in with myself.
I learned in Al-anon that on the flip side of a defect is an asset. Control when used in a balanced way has been an asset for me. Al-anon has shown me how a defect like control can make a transformation into a healthier behavior. I can practice Al-anon recovery with detachment, boundaries, responsibility and motivation.
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Surround yourself with people and elements that support your destiny, not just your history.