The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
This writer describes a common evolution for new fellowship members: first discover or acknowledge the anger long suppressed or denied, the anger now untethered flexes its power until it contributes to more pain; it turns out that the alcoholic is not responsible for all of our unhappiness.
Alanon offers a sanity saving perspective that encourages healthy acknowledgement and expression of our anger toward the pain and damage from alcohol, tempered by acceptance that we are powerless to control it. We are able to turn our focus and efforts toward what we can change: ourselves and our role in our dealings with others.
Reminder: Anger can deliver only an illusion of power over our situation and people that will always fail. Step 11 points to a power that will not fail us derived from thought and meditation connecting us to our higher power.
"No one can control the insidious effect of alcohol, or its power to destroy the graces and decencies of life...But we do have a power, derived from God, and that is the power to change our own lives." ODAT ------------------------- I was full of anger when I found Alanon, tied directly to the belief that I was a victim of a misbehaving, undisciplined person who was not following my well laid plans and directives.
Alanon has helped me immensely and improved my worldview dramatically. Anger still emerges as an issue, and for the same reasons: someone not behaving or responding as I think they should...Step 1...control...the absolute basics of Alanon.
Grateful for the needed reminders
__________________
Paul
"...when we try to control others, we lose the ability to manage our own lives." - Paths to Recovery
Thanks Paul for your service and all above ESH. Anger, denial, and a host of other feelings kept me from seeing that I also had problems and the A was not totally to blame. It was a difficult but necessary step in my life. And I think I couldn't have taken that step without this program. It's easy to blame others; it's difficult to take responsibility. I just have to keep on keeping on. :)
Thank you Paul for your service and all shares. I used sarcasm as a socially acceptable tool to deal with most situations that angered me. The emotionally painful stuff I suppressed. Al-Anon gives me tools to identify the feelings hidden behind my anger and respond appropriately/maturely.
