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Post Info TOPIC: Hope for Today Oct 16

~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 1116
Hope for Today Oct 16

Good morning everyone:

Todays reading is about what we do when we realize we have the strength and ability to make changes in our lives. The writer describes passing a frozen lake, including a spot with some cracks in it where ducks had been swimming. One of the ducks tried to get to the other side by scrambling over the thin sheet of ice, repeating with the motion until the ice began to crack. It seemed the duck forgot that another option was to take flight.  The writer saw this as a metaphor for how often we insist on trying to do the same thing over and over again and expect that the outcome might be different.  The writer began looking at the tools within alanon to find his/her wings and net become mired in the legacy of the alcoholic family.

I remember at one point in my life, recognizing  that I was playing a part in the cycle of alcoholism in my house.  It was not about one person making changes or not, it involved me too! It was a revelation, and also emboldened me to make changes that helped bring peacefulness in and replace the chaos that had been taking up so much space. The writer references the fourth step and taking a personal inventory to see strengths as well as character defects.  It was difficult for me to name strengths alongside all of the defects I could very easily name, but practicing this has helped me build my confidence, just as the writer noted in this reading.

The quotation from Living Today in Alateen (p55): This program has shown me that I have choices. I could stay the way I was, or I could change.

I hope everyone enjoys a peaceful Sunday:)



~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 917

Good morning Mary,

Thank you for sharing this great page and for your ESH.

This is such a powerful concept in Alanon recovery, it is always helpful for me to recall that realization you describe in my own life, the push me over with a feather moment of dawning followed by an incredible excitement as I realized the implications: I need not rely any longer on the desperate need for someone else to change in order for me to experience change in the relationship. I was no longer subject to their choices and behavior as frames of my present and astounding revelation.

When I think of this, I often picture two plotted points making a line (or perhaps a segment or ray, technically ). If one point will not or cannot be moved, the other can pivot 360 degrees to entirely change the line of direction. This visual helps me remember the power of Alanon lies, not in directly changing the position of others, but first the perspective, then thoughts and behaviors of myself.

There are no limits on the changes I can make, I truly do have a choice....change my perspective, change the world...grateful for the wisdom of the program



"...when we try to control others, we lose the ability to manage our own lives."  - Paths to Recovery 

~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 841

Thank you and happy Sunday Mary, Paul and the MIP Family!

I too marvel at the peace I am able to experience once I put into action the lessons of Al-Anon.

Perspective and expectations are entirely up to me, their importance and place in the scheme

of my life really do determine how I can change my circumstances from chaotic to peaceful,

and read that it is likened to having a thorn stuck in your finger, that one would not allow

the thorn to stay and fester so why allow pointless "stinkin thinkin" to stay in ones thoughts

and infect one's life?! {{HUGS}}


"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but it

does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart". ~ unknown


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