The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
The writer talks about frustration and disappointments when we expect too much. It's good to have high standards, but only if we can accept with serenity, when the results fall short. We expect more of an alcoholic than they can deliver, and often the expectations we have for ourselves are way too demanding. Let us learn to accept less than we were expecting, and accept gratefully the good that comes to us.
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One of the life lessons that Betty tried to pound into my head was to have NO expectations. Believe me I tried and am still trying. Often I succeed but many times I don't. Some things don't come easy. Lately I'm working on acceptance, gratitude, and no expectations. When I can combine this triplet of tools, I'm so much better off. Progress not perfection.
This past weekend was "supposed" to be special but instead of expecting it to be I decided to accept reality, that it wouldn't be what I wanted it to be.I was pleasantly surprised though. I was actually happy with how things went.
It was such a good reminder that many(most) of my issues and problems are due to my expectations.
Thanks Lyne and everyone. Expectations are disappointments in progress is how I remember it. It's somewhat easier to remember it with other people, but I frequently forget to apply it to myself and when I am frustrated with myself, I am more likely to be irritable with others so it's a really important one to remember.
