The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I woke up this morning with the word "Harmony" on my mind. It applies to so much of what we all are trying to accomplish in Al-Anon. Harmony in marriage, friendship, family, groups.
So I pulled out my trusty "Pathways to Recovery" to Tradition One (Our Common welfare should come first, personal progress for the greatest numbers, depends on Unity) didn't read far and there was the word! I will give a brief quote for those that don't have the book. p136
It's talking about finding a group that you are comfortable with and we feel at home.
"Sometimes however, members conscienciously or unconsciencely disregard the Traditions. In such instances each of us has a responsponsibility to remind them of the Traditions, in a caring, loving way. When making such a suggestion it helps if we remember that guidelines for the group are HARMONY."
My HP always puts just what i need to hear right in front of me when I need to find! It's up to me to practice it.
Josey
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Julianne - It's best to move on. You cannot look back in anger in life. It's too short
Hello Josey , thanks for the reminders latley . Good stuff !!!!
I get so ticked when little "stupid " things start disrupting our chat room. We come from all situations and lifestyles there is no room for judgment here . We are bound to disagree ocassionally with what is said in an meeting room and taking things personally just makes things worse. It simply dosent matter that we don't agree , thats what makes Al-Anon work for me , it dosen't mean that either of us are wrong ,we simply don't agree.
Let it go and get on with recovery works . I have found over that years that most of us are overly sensitive anyway when we first arrive and always take it personally. we have a oldtimer in our f2f who always says ,early on we are people pleasers always wanting everyone to liKe us when were young we are so concerned about what others think of us and when we reach 60 we find out that they weren't thinking of us at all !! gotta love it.
The continuous picking apart a post that is simply someones opinion only keeps things volitile and such a waste of good space. seems to me some of us fall into the catagory of If we knew how Al-Anon works we would have to "change it " nature of the beast"
What works for me is if something is offending me I leave the room ,it's definetly my problem and when I hear the word am sorry if someone missunderstood said over and over again it really ticks me off. If they are truly sorry they would stop it ! so again I just watch what people do don't pay much attention to what they say. This is about change and the only thing we have any control over is ourselves and our attitudes about what is going on around us.
In reading these post it makes me wonder about things.Kinda raises some thoughts to think about. Its seems to be that you may be upset about someonr or something and I thought I'd try to help , as I'm curious to understand this too.
I 1st picked up the blue book,one day at a time in alanon. I looked up in the back at tradition 1 and it refers to pgs 20, 77, 322 You may particularly be interested in 77. That might be the closest one to reference here. part of it starts out saying "If my life is in chaos, I will look into myself for the cause and cure and use the 12 steps to improve my shortcomings." There are other references to alanon being a program of self improvement and nourishment and concern for ALL members. And my understanding is if my life was affected by alcohol I am a member of equal entitlement to what the program has to offer as the others in the same position are. We all came affected in different ways and im sure whoever you are refering to , if all they want is trouble will leave or not stay interested for the approapriate reasons. I wouldnt let them upset harmony and make such an issue of it as there may be something that person is trying to heal you may be unaware of. All of us have a right to grow at owr own pace and not to someone elses disgression. Resistance to others can sometimes mean resistance to our own growth and self serving needs. Its a touchy thing treading on these waters.
The other idea that stuck out and seems interesting to discuss is where it says about getting ticked when "stupid" things start disrupting "OUR CHATROOM" ???????????????? Who's is it ? Does some one here own it ????I thought it was for ALL members !!! If we are at different stages at the time we come , we are not all working on the same issues at the same time. How is it we then can make room for ALL the members that the program is for ??
I hope that the turmoil you are refering to is just one persons personal opinion and there isn't anyone in there attempting to do that. I'm sure if there is and you leave them alone and put energy into your growth you will feel better. Beings there are no authorities in alanon I'm not sure what else to say to assist you.
BLESSINGS, PEACE, HARMONY, SERENITY..............YOUR SISTER IN RECOVERY
Take what you need and leave the restLive and Let Live
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I tell myself when times are rough, "this to shall pass!!!" Ask HP for guidance, if the door is open, and I know how to look, I will become aware! I also visit http://www.inspiringthots.net/ . Blessings , Your sister in Recovery
Dear friends, This is a good post. Thank you. A good teacher told me a long time ago to hold a quality in your mind as you go through your life. "Harmony" is a good example. When you hold it in your mind, you will be seeking harmony, you will look for harmony. That can only make your life better! Thanks for the reminder. I am going to begin again today. Blessings, mebjk
......YOUR SISTER IN RECOVERY 
Take what you need and leave the rest