The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Since meeting my husband 8 years ago, he and my youngest bio daughter haven't seen eye to eye at all. I have tried so hard to let them work it out. The other night she finally came to him and said that she was sorry for being such a pain towards him all these years. His response while still staring at the television is yeah, thanks. I saw the hurt and lack of validation, but I can't control his reaction. I later that night told her I was so proud of her awareness and that it's in his ball park to forgive or have more conversation about that later and she opened the door. I am proud of her and as a 12 year old has come a long way. Lots of late night talks about respect, forgiveness and grace is working out. Our house is chaotic a lot of day with 6 daughters, 2-bio's, 2 step & 2 foster girls all 12-23 years old. But I love my life and we are doing our best. I want to shake my husband but I can not fix him or force him to forgive all his resentments from her past behaviors, words and attitudes towards him. So I pray they will continue to grow in their relationship and Let Go and Let God! Sending you all love and support on your journey's!
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Sending you love and support on your journey always! BreakingFree
Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666
" Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional."
"Serenity is when your body and mind are in the same place."
Thank you for sharing this look into your home life, Breakingfree.
You know, sometimes kids just need to mature a little. I thought it was great that you expressed to her that you were proud of the growth, and pointed out the ball is now in the step-father's court. Your bio-daughter is learning to live with the consequences of her behaviors. Not always easy. Hopefully, future behaviors show that she really meant the amends, and your hubby can eventually validate her in a meaningful way.
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
(((BF))) - you done good! You clearly have raised one (probably all) great gal who will keep making you proud and keep making mistakes. It's part of our human experience. Staying in my lane at times like this isn't always easy yet you did it with grace, faith and trust for a better tomorrow. Way to go!!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Oh great share, BF... sounds promising... 
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