The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Hi y'all... in any group I really like to see feedback.
So, the way to get feedback is easy-peasy... I just give it. ...
My local meeting now has a zoom meeting- and the numbers have grown.
So I found out that there is another member in my home town- a seasoned member from Sydney.
I am in no big hurry to restart the group here- and promised myself to just offer back-up and support.
Over lock-down I finally realised- that in both Alanon and ACA I am no longer a newcomer.
To be honest I have always felt like a newcomer! I have always been one of those people who rarely missed a meeting, and rarely missed getting to a meeting- where ever I was.
The other person is a woman- and I tend not to make any move, outside of the meeting. Boundaries are really precious to me. The things that are really important to me are both: the rituals of encounter and the rites of passage.
So it does take time to create trust- and to establish bonds of various kinds. When it was a F@F group, the group I go to has really strong bonds- with its established members.
Part of me still feels codependent and needy- but it is about awareness, acceptance and action.
The good side is being emotionally vulnerable- and safe and suitable places...
...for me- empathy and emotion go together.
So- not really an "agony aunt" sort of posting. Just a regular share- a treat.
{{{David}}}. Your posts always give me something to think about. Trust for me is a tough one. I have some family and some friends that I do trust. But to let new people in is not easy for me. Over the years I was unlikely to start new friendships even when invited. One reason I stay with my A that Im not proud of, is that I dont ever want to be vulnerable again in a romantic way. Ive come to not need others to be content and happy. Dont get me wrong, today I am FaceTiming with my sister who lives across the USI cherish these moments with her. But alanon has broken me of a very bad habitcodependency. And Im ever so grateful, and maybe not as healthy as I could be, but a work in progress for sure! Lyne
I love reading your shares, David! This one seems contemplative and peaceful.
I had learned to mistrust. I used to be pretty gullible. If you told me it was so, then I would take you at face-value... I mean, I wouldn't lie, so why would they (or anyone I was dealing with)? So yeah, you can imagine how Addiction tore me up!! I can acknowledge it now, but I still suffer the collateral damage - which is I don't trust anyone but my parents...it really is sad.
"I don't ask for much, I only want trust, and you know it don't come easy!" - Ringo Starr
Thank you David and Lyne for sharing your thoughts. &
__________________
"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
Hi y'all... in any group I really like to see feedback. 
...
I can acknowledge it now, but I still suffer the collateral damage - which is I don't trust anyone but my parents...it really is sad.
& 