The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Today's reading suggests that Step 7 -- "Humbly asked him to remove our shortcomings" -- can be taken with joy and humor. Being able to laugh about a shortcoming is a sign of being humble enough to ask for it to be removed. If we can see one of our past actions as ludicrous, it means our higher power has lessened the impact of our shortcoming on us. The author says that they can even laugh at their own intensity of struggling to get rid of a shortcoming. Letting go of the intensity, having humor, lets us get out of the way of our higher power so the shortcoming can be removed.
Today's Reminder: Desperation and pain can certainly lead me to humility, but in Al-Anon I'm cultivating a new and eager willingness to follow my higher power's guidance. Because I am willing, I am freer to learn from all of life's lessons, not just the ones that hurt.
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I am so lucky, being the Friday poster, that I get to post on Friday the 13th. I don't think I have noticed this page before, and it is such a great example of the gentleness of our program. I was so desperate when I came in, I was willing to do anything, and if I had to be humble, if I had to confess my misdeeds, so be it. In working and studying the steps with groups, a sponsor, and here -- I learned that humility does not mean being humiliated. In one of my groups we had a discussion about humility, and someone described their view that being humble means being teachable. I like that interpretation.
Laughing about my shortcomings -- what an amazing idea. And I have become able to do it. There was nothing funny about the reason I came to Al-Anon. But when I became able to take a step back from my pain, and look at myself, it gave me a bigger perspective, where the bad stuff was part of a bigger picture, but not the whole picture. Here's an idea -- removing my shortcomings means having more room for my positive assets. Kind of like Marie Kondo, the de-cluttering expert, who teaches people to remove possessions that don't spark joy.
I love the reminder I am freer to learn from all of life's lessons, not just the ones that hurt. Some experiences do hurt, but there are more possibilities in life than that, and when I step out of my intensive worrying and accept help from my higher powers, I can see them.
I hope you all find something to laugh joyfully about today.
Happy Friday the 13th Freetime - thanks for your service, the daily and your share! I was so intense and serious when I arrived, I really did not see any humor in anything!!! My obsession of what others were doing and the disease had truly robbed me of my sense of humor, lightness of heart and certainly my serenity.
I am a completely different person today. If/when I feel the old 'fear' try to rise up, I have a huge toolbox to help me pause and pray so I proceed differently. Humor for me has been an awesome addition to my toolbox and am grateful I am free to keep learning, growing and changing.
One of the many reasons I step sideways to avoid controlling and crazy people, places and things is I was 'that' and have no interest or desire to return. In letting go of many defects that revolved around controlling others and trying to force solutions, I've been able to attract and retain way healthier friends and adopted family. I believe like attracts like, so the healthier I become the more selective I am about who I spend time with and invest in.
I feel blessed to have the support of the God of my understanding who leads me each day to be humble, and just 'roll with it'. I have no issue laughing at the many gaffes and mistakes I make each day - unconditional acceptance of being human is liberating! Love and light to all - stay safe and find/keep your joy!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Thanks for your service FT and I enjoyed both above shares. I've come to accept my imperfections so much that asking HP to remove my character defects has become a regular part of my morning prayers. A couple weeks ago I had a massage and while I was lying there I asked God to come right into my head--feel free to take up space and help me every day. I do need help. That is a part of who I am now. I am comfortable to rely on program and every part of it to guide, strengthen and heal me. Let the sun shine in, Lyne
