The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I have heard it thousands of times, and said it hundreds of time... the regular opening.
It is not cast in steel or bronze.
Over time it might change- and a lot of things change.
Alanon has district assemblies, and right up to WSO. Ideas come forward all the time and they should. Remits can go before conference.
This may take years- and change is not inevitable.
Individual groups have a certain amount of leeway- with tradition 4. No-one is going to worry what we do- unless it comes to the attention of GSO or WSO.
The main this is that groups work well- keep everybody working together, and we keep everything moving forward.
For one- I feel that our personal opinions are important, and even essential. I believe that our opinions are just as important as out emotions. In fact our beliefs and opinions, and our emotions, are closely intertwined.
What we all are passionate about- is important! ...
In our families we were often not heard, let alone heeded. Being listened to and understood is a great healer. And we earn to listen too- in a safe space.
In Alanon there are boundaries and limits- as to what we discuss and how. Some members may test these limits, which is fine. The loving interchange amongst members generally take care of this.
When the higher power issues come up- this will test the boundaries. This is a key learning arena. I actually believe that steps 2 and 3 are good to go- inside of a loving caring group. [I would not force that on anyone, of course!] But I like to see this even before someone considers looking for a sponsor. Learning to trust and to be trusting- is a great gift.
Our groups are strong and resilient- most of the time. We are winners, and survivors. ...
...whether, here, or in the USA I would try to get to a meeting if I could.
It is Sunday morning here- and a nice summer's day, on the way. The link above- was to a meeting which still reads from the AA Big Book. I doubt if many regular meetings still do this. The meeting mentioned must be one of very long standing!
Maybe we could start the week- with The Welcome which will be always with us, I am sure!
This comes from an anonymous share from A New Zealand member- about her first meeting.
My eyes blink with tears- tears of recognition- even as i read this now:
The three of us went along, listened to the sharings and had a cup of tea. We may have mingled afterwards, or we may have left straight away I cant recall because it was so long ago. What I do remember is that that night at that meeting someone I had never met before told my story out loud. She shared my secrets and it shook me to the core. I will never forget it. I spent much of the night blinking back tears pretending not to be affected by what I had heard. It took immense amounts of grit and strength to squash the violent wave of emotion that was threatening to erupt. But I held myself together, stuffed my feelings once again into that sad, dark and lonely secret place that lived inside me and I kept up appearances, just like Id been taught to do at home: dont show you are hurt, dont show your feelings, dont let people know the truth, shhh. It never happened. I was really good at that.